A/N: Hello everyone!
First of all - Minicuda: thanks for your reviews...can't answer you since you are just a guest. But a word about huskies. They are the most amazing dogs ever. Raising a whole litter has been a life changing experience (giving some of the puppies away was not easy though, but all of them have found good homes with friends, so it's okay) and four huskies in my own life is the most precious gift ever. I don't want to miss them for a second.
Thanks for everyone's reviews, messages, follows and favorites - I'm flattered!
You guys are seriously THE BEST and most wonderful people :)
And now on with the story...let me tell you that this chapter is just a filler, but it is necessary none-the-less.
Hope it doesn't bore you out.
Much love
xoxo
TAKE ME TO WONDERLAND
Chapter 16
The drive back home was a silent one.
Emma and Regina were content and glad that everything had went over smoothly, that Gold had not done anything to stop Regina from leaving.
And while Emma expected that he was up to something, that he had something up his sleeve for her – it did not really matter, because Regina was free.
She would worry about the rest when the time came.
Standing in the elevator, on their way up to Emma's penthouse, Regina finally looked at her, endless gratitude shining in her eyes, "I..."
Emma reached out, giving Regina time to pull back, but the brunette never backed away, so she took Regina's hand as gentle as ever and squeezed it softly, "You don't have to say anything. It's okay. I'm just glad it's finally over...and now you can live your life the way you want it."
Henry was sound asleep on the couch when they entered the loft and so were Ruby, Graham and Killian.
It was quite the sight, especially with the 'The Lion King' running in the background.
Emma and Regina bit their lips to stop themselves from laughing out loud, but Emma could not help it and sneaked around to take a picture of the four of them with her mobile phone.
They would never live that down.
Her best friends, the ultimate party people, worn out by a disney movie and a nine year old.
Priceless.
She sent the pic to her friends cell phones, even to Regina's and motioned for the brunette to follow her to her home office, which the brunette did without even questioning it.
"You can sleep in the guest room as usual...if you want. Or you can sleep in my...bedroom...if you don't want to be so close to everyone...I'll be working anyway", Emma stated quickly, turning on her computer.
"What? Emma...you need to rest. You're looking tired since days", Regina countered, her brows furrowed in confusion.
"I can't. I have to get some work done...because I have a meeting with Gold on the 2nd of January and I need to talk to a friend, who is an interior designer, first thing in the morning to ask if what I have in mind is possible after all. Don't worry, I'll be fine...really. But I need to get this done, because I have to take care of my other assignments first thing in the new year...so I need to coordinate wisely...like I always do when I take an extra job that was not planned..." Emma explained with a tired smile and grabbed a file from the table, just to roam over it a second later.
Regina instantly felt guilty again, because Emma did not deserve all this trouble. The blonde should be in bed, getting the rest she needed.
"Is there anything I can do to help?"
Emma shook her hand, "I appreciate it, Regina, but no...everything's fine...although...you could make breakfast in the morning."
The brunette sighed, but nodded, "Fine. I can do that. Good night then, Emma. Don't stay up too long."
"I won't."
Regina had slept in the guestroom as usual, because she trusted Emma's judgement about her friends.
She would probably never trust them completely, but she did trust Emma and that was enough for Regina to fall asleep after the emotional roller coaster ride she had been on all day.
Henry had woken her around eight and Regina had gotten up to find Killian, Graham and Ruby setting the table and making coffee.
"Good morning, Regina", Ruby greeted, "We got already started, but we thought we'd leave breakfast to you...because what can I say...my cooking skills are lacking...kind of."
Regina nodded with a chuckle and headed right for the fridge, checking for ingredients while Henry bounced down the corridor to Emma's bedroom, "I'll wake up Emma."
He came back only a moment later, stating that Emma was not in her bed and Regina sighed.
She knew exactly where the blonde would be.
"Henry, can you put the eggs into the bowl for me, please?"
He looked at his mother, slightly confused by her request, but showed up right next to her anyway, "All twelve?"
"Yes, sweetheart. All of them."
That said Regina made her way over to Emma's office and knocked softly.
No reply.
She knocked again, a bit louder, but there was still no reaction.
Regina prepared herself for the sight that would greet her and opened the door, but to her surprise the room was empty.
Where was Emma?
"She's not in her office", Regina announced when she returned to the kitchen and everyone's head shot up in surprise.
"She isn't?" Ruby seemed to be truly confused.
Graham grabbed his jacket and headed for the door, "Just get breakfast ready...I'll get her. I'm pretty sure I know where she is."
Emma was sitting in the gazebo in the park not far from her penthouse, lost in thought.
She had sneaked out in the early morning to go for a run, to clear her head and somehow she had ended up right there.
It was one of her favorite places, because the park was almost empty in the mornings, especially during the colder seasons of the year – in fact it was hardly ever crowded, not even in summer.
The gazebo had become her hiding place during the time she had been living here, but she was not sure what she was hiding from today.
Everything was fine, she should be happy.
And she was – just not exactly as happy as she thought she would be.
"Penny for your thoughts?"
Graham's voice made her jump and she glared at her friend for a few seconds before she registered what was going on, "What are you doing here?"
"Breakfast is ready, princess."
"Don't call me that!" Emma mock glared at him and bumped him with her shoulder, "Seems I've forgotten time."
"So, you and Killian seemed to be okay yesterday", Emma announced on their walk back.
"If you think we are getting back together then I have to disappoint you", Graham replied, "But yes, we get along. Hope it stays that way...because I don't want to lose him as a friend."
"I get that", Emma stated, "And it would be a shame if we couldn't hang out together anymore...I mean...all of us...together...that would totally suck."
"It would...but enough of the gay drama...how are things with you and Regina?"
Emma chuckled, "Didn't you say enough of the gay drama?"
Graham laughed out at that, "Right...but I'm serious, Em...are you okay? You seem a little off this morning."
"Everything's fine. I'm just stressed with all the extra work for Gold...but it will be alright. Once we've done the photo shoot and I have material to work with...it will be alright."
Breakfast had been delicious and a lot of fun and Emma was surprised that nobody had brought up going for a party tonight – since it was New Year's Eve.
Sure, Regina had promised to cook dinner yesterday, but still – none of her friends seemed to be in the mood to party, but before she could have given that fact any more thought, Ruby had solved the riddle for her.
"We decided to stay in this year...with David still in coma and everything...it just doesn't feel right to...you know...celebrate...hope you don't mind everyone coming to your place?"
Emma shook her head, "It's quite alright...I'm sure it's going to be a great evening...even without the big parties."
"That's what I said", Graham stated matter-of-factly and smiled at Emma.
"I have to head home though...I have some stuff to prepare for my gallery opening, but I'll be back at five", the photographer announced with an apologetic smile.
"Sure. See you later, Graham", Emma hugged him quickly, "I'll take a shower, but then I have some work to do as well..."
Regina cleared her throat to say something about that, but decided against it in the last second. There was no point in arguing with Emma about work, at least not at the moment, "Any special wishes for dinner...because I have to go and do some shopping."
"Mooom...please, don't make me come with you...I wanna stay home", Henry whined at his mother's statement, clearly not fond of the idea to get dragged from one store to the next. He knew how picky his mother could be when it came to cooking for guests. Not that she had done it often in the past, but even when Ashley had been over for lunch or dinner on rare occasions Regina had almost flipped over shopping and he was pretty sure that she would top it all today.
Killian chuckled at the desperate look in the boy's eyes, "I could keep you company...if your mom allows it."
Regina nodded, "Very well."
"Awesome!" Henry was overjoyed at the news.
"Well, then I'll go shopping with you...if you don't mind", Ruby offered, "Someone has to help you carry all the bags after all."
"That would be great", Regina approved although she would not have minded to go by herself.
Emma smiled at the people in her living room, because things seemed to work out well between all of them and she was glad.
She had no idea what she would do if her friends would not accept Regina and Henry, but thankfully she did not have to worry about that.
"Rubes, you can take my car...I know how much you love it...oh right...and take my credit card too...since I'm obviously hosting."
That said Emma disappeared into the bathroom and Ruby jumped in victory, because she did indeed love Emma's black Mercedes.
New Year's Eve at the penthouse had been a full success.
Everybody had complimented Regina on her cooking and to everyone's surprise Belle had made an appearance together with Mary Margaret.
Henry had taken tons of photos with his new camera and Graham had showed him how to make the best out of every picture, had explained to him the importance of light and the right angle and Henry had listened to every single word carefully.
They had sat together for a long while, talking about the events of the year, bathing in memories, sharing a lot of laughter till the clock had stroke midnight.
Toasts had been made then and everyone had started the New Year on a good note, surrounded by friends and family.
The next few weeks were rather busy for everyone.
Regina had started to work for Killian, which had turned out to be a great decision, because she did really well and enjoyed every second of working for and with the most eccentric of Emma's friends.
Killian and her had started to bond the second he had picked her up for her first day of work, because a gay man clearly would be no threat to her.
Especially since he was one of Emma's best friends.
Some of the other make up artists working for Killian had given her a hard time the first couple of days when they had found out that she was a former stripper, but Killian had jumped right to her defense and had told them that he would fire everyone, who would not behave, that he would not tolerate people bullying Regina.
The brunette had been surprised, but Killian had only shrugged, "Emma would kill me if I would let anything happen to you...and besides...you are really talented, Regina. And you are my friend."
And in that moment she had realized that Emma had been right all along – everything would be fine.
Emma was busy with all her projects, especially with the planning for Gold's events, but she tried her hardest to find enough time to see her friends and hang out with Regina and Henry anyway.
Graham was occupied with work as well and with his gallery opening and of course with editing the pictures he had taken during the photo shoot for The Rabbit Hole campaign.
The shoot had been an interesting project altogether, because it had been a while since Graham, Emma, Ruby and Killian had worked together, but they had enjoyed every second of it and the photos had turned out to be absolutely stunning.
So, everything was going good so far – the new year had started out great.
But the best news had been the ones of David waking up from his coma a couple of days ago.
Emma, Regina and Henry had been on the way to the zoo when Emma had gotten the call and they had visited him the same day.
Mary Margaret had not been able to stop crying, happy tears of course, and Regina could see how much the pixie haired woman loved her fiancé.
They clearly were meant to be together.
To everyone's surprise Henry had taken to David right away and David had been quite fond of the boy from the start as well.
And so Henry had visited David practically every day after school ever since.
David was bored anyway, but the doctors had told him that he would be released soon and everyone was thrilled about the news – especially Henry since David had promised him that he would take him camping as soon as he would be fully recovered.
It would be a long way back for him, but with the support of his friends and family David would get through rehab and all the other obstacles waiting from him on the road.
Regina was not sure what to think of the whole situation, because obviously Henry was looking for a father figure in his life, which was understandable, but she was wary.
David seemed to be a nice guy and although she would never fully warm up to Mary Margaret, they got along.
Something about the pixie haired woman bothered her, but she was not sure what it was.
Probably her naive view on the world, her weird belief that everything was about peace, love and forgiveness.
What bothered her the most though was Belle's and Mary Margaret's lifestyle, the way they spent money without questioning it.
They bought whatever they wanted and if they got tired of it they replaced it with something new and more interesting, more glitterly or whatever.
What if David was the same?
What if he got tired of Henry at some point?
Regina did not know how to handle this situation, because she had never been in a situation like this before.
Probably she should let Henry make his own experiences, but she just could not do that.
She had to protect Henry although she knew it was not necessarily for his best, but her own past did not allow her to let go.
She was worried sick that Henry would get hurt, paranoid even and she would try to avoid that at all costs.
But the closer Graham's gallery opening came the more Henry tried to convince Regina that she should go there with Emma.
That she should go out for one night and have fun, because she had not done anything for herself in forever.
And when David got released right in time Regina had no arguments anymore and so it was settled – they would have an early dinner at Emma's, all of them, and while everyone would show up at the gallery to support Graham, David would keep Henry company, because he could not walk or stand for long periods yet anyway.
He would probably even need another surgery on his damaged knee.
Graham showed up at Emma's place the night before the gallery opening, completely worn out.
He looked like a ghost in fact, because he had been working like a maniac to get everything done in time.
He was pale and the dark circles under his eyes were the proof that he had not slept much during the last weeks, but Emma knew all of that too well to give him a pep talk about working too much since she had been quite busy herself.
Time was running for all of them after all.
"You know...we really should go on a vacation or something once that opening is over", Emma announced once they were seated on the couch with a glass of wine.
"I absolutely agree, sweetheart. That sounds like a lovely idea..."
"It does, doesn't it? And we've been talking about going to Hawaii for so long...but we never did. Something came up...every damn time", Emma sighed and took a sip of the white liquid.
Graham chuckled at that, "True that. We've been talking about it since 'Forgetting Sarah Marshall'...oh, how much you were whining...Graham, let's go to Turtle Bay...that resort is sooo beautiful...we have to go there..."
Emma laughed out loud as well, "And you know I am right...it is a great place for a vacation...I mean it's ridiculous...we don't have to worry about money and yet we never made it there...because we were too busy with our careers...because we are two damn workaholics."
"It's really a shame, Em...we should focus on the important things in life from time to time...like family and friends..."
"We'll do...right after your successful gallery opening tomorrow", Emma raised her glass, "To Turtle Bay."
Graham did the same and smiled, "To Turtle Bay."
And since they were already talking about it they decided that they could as well watch the movie.
By the time the credits rolled Graham and Emma were sore from laughing and Graham coughed wildly.
That movie was hysterical.
And the Turtle Bay resort stunning.
Nobody could say otherwise, right?
"You know what, Em? I'm going to get us tickets...first thing in the morning...we deserve this", Graham exclaimed once he had calmed down.
"We do", Emma agreed, but at the same time she cringed at the idea of going on a vacation without Regina and Henry.
It did not feel right, but she did not want to disappoint Graham either.
And she certainly did not want to give him the impression that he would not be enough, because he was.
But she would miss Regina and the kid terribly.
They had talked about the project for Gold for a while, about David finally waking up and about the wedding that would probably happen soon now that he was awake, but in the end they had landed back on the one topic only Graham was aware of – Emma's feelings for a certain brunette.
Her feelings for Regina Mills.
"Come on, Em...spill it. And don't even try to tell me that everything is okay...I can see it in your eyes...how sad you are I mean...trouble in paradise?"
Emma shook her head, "No, no trouble...it's just..."
Graham put his hand on her arm for comfort, "Let me guess...your feelings are not going away, right?"
Of course he had figured it out, of course he had seen right through her, so Emma shrugged helplessly, "No, they haven't...it's so hard sometimes, Graham...to talk to her, to see her practically every day...and to know that we can never..."
"You don't know that, sweetheart", he tried to encourage her, but Emma shook her head once again, "No, you don't understand. Even if Regina wouldn't be straight...even if the circumstances were different...it wouldn't change anything, Graham. The things she's been through...her whole past...I'm not even sure if she is capable of loving anyone...except from Henry."
"It's really that bad, huh?"
"You can't even imagine...I'm still struggling with everything she's told me...I had so many nightmares since that day...sometimes I'm scared to fall asleep..." Emma confessed and ducked her head.
She should not feel like this, because nothing of it had happened to her, but she could not stop herself from feeling what she was feeling.
This was about Regina after all.
And everything that concerned Regina, especially her awful past, made Emma want to rip off her own skin.
She could barely wrap her head around everything the brunette had told her.
How much Regina must have suffered, how little she thought of herself. And while Emma had sworn to herself that she would make it all better for Regina, she doubted that she really could.
Because there was absolutely nothing that could ease a pain like that.
"So, that's the reason for your sleepless nights...for working so much", Graham stated matter-of-factly, "Does Regina know about this?"
"No. And she can never know. She's struggling with nightmares of her own...and I don't want to burden her with my crap...she's been through enough...and now that life's finally getting better for her...I mean you should see her at work...she is so awesome...Killian adores her...", Emma smiled at her own words.
"I get that, Em. And I'm happy that she is doing so well...but you can't forget about yourself...no matter how much you want to help her...you and your life...your happiness count too."
Silence hung over them for a while till the first tears started to run down Emma's cheeks and the pain she had been holding in for weeks finally broke its way to the surface, "I don't know what to do, Graham. I can't lose her...I can't lose her...I want her to be okay...I want all of us to be okay...and happy..."
Graham pulled Emma into a warm embrace and rubbed circles over her back in an attempt to give her more comfort, "Everything will be fine, Emma...you have to have faith...and then everything will be fine. But you have to talk to Regina...you are friends after all. And no matter whether you will ever be more than friends or not...you can trust her and you know it...and besides that she deserves the truth...give her a chance to be there for you...she might surprise you, because she clearly is stronger than everyone of us has given her credit for."
And then Graham said a silent prayer for his desperately hurting friend, glad that Emma could not see the pain in his own eyes.
