A/N: Hello lovelies,
sorry for the wait again...got a little side tracked with my new story "Possession" *evil smirk*
I had not planned on posting it yet, but well...with my friend MG's birthday...I thought it would be a nice idea since her video inspired me so much.
Anyway...
Here is Chapter 22 of "Take me to Wonderland".
I'm quite happy how it turned out although I had planned to write this evil cliffhanger...but I thought I'd be nice for once.
Yeah, I know...no idea what has gotten into me xD
Hope you'll enjoy reading...and I was not kidding when I said it's going to be a slow born story, but I'm sure everyone has figured that out by now. Hope you all don't mind.
Thanks for your continued love and support - it makes all the difference
much love xo
ps.: LSutcliff *evil grin* It takes more to scare me, dear. Believe me. A lot more.
On that note you've been spying on me again, haven't you? Well, well...what am I going to do with you?
Hm...I'll think of something. *evil laugh*
That said...I will drop you a message later...hope you don't mind.
TAKE ME TO WONDERLAND
Chapter 22
Brunch with the Swans had not taken place, because Emma had been stuck at work since Gold had announced some more wishes.
Of course he was just trying to make her life miserable, but Emma had managed to organise everything and the first of two parties could come.
She was ready.
But before that would happen next weekend she had to survive this one.
It was Henry's birthday after all.
She loved the kid and she was looking forward to the party Mary Margaret and Ruby had volunteered to plan, because neither her nor Regina would have found the time since both of them had been incredibly busy with work lately.
But Emma was worn out.
Too much work, too many times she had droven over to Graham's old apartment over the last two weeks in the middle of the night to comfort Ruby, who loved the place, but could barely handle the memories.
The whole situation was difficult for everyone, but Emma slowly came to peace with it – thanks to the support of Regina and Henry.
Ruby on the other side had the hardest time and it did not look as if it would get better any time soon.
At least the whole situation had brought them closer together again and Emma was thankful for that because she loved Ruby with all her heart.
She was her best friend after all.
And Emma also knew that if she ever found the courage to talk to someone – about her feelings for Regina and all the worries and fears these feelings brought with them – it most likely would be Ruby.
She trusted Ruby and she was aware that the leggy brunette would listen, that she would care and that she would not judge. She would try to help, but she would never judge.
And that knowledge alone made Emma feel so much better.
But an apartment full of people did not sound too appealing still.
Not when all she wanted to do was sleep, get some much needed rest.
And yet she stood in the kitchen, cutting tomatoes while Regina was busy with making a cake.
Emma sighed.
As much as she wished she could find the time to relax she would not trade this sight for anything in the world.
It felt so domestic, it felt like they would be a family for real.
The cake was ready, the lasagna in the oven and Regina was nervous.
This was Henry's first birthday party and she wanted everything to be perfect.
Ruby and Mary Margaret had done a great job with the decoration and everything, but Regina was anxious still.
Some of Henry's classmates were coming and Archie Hopper would make an appearance as well since he was a family friend of the Swans.
He seemed to be a nice man, but Regina was still wary.
And so very nervous.
She felt Tamotsu's nose on her palm and looked down to stare right into the dog's warm eyes.
In the beginning he had given her an almost heart attack whenever he had done that, but she had gotten used to it by now.
She had gotten used to him by now.
Regina would never admit it, but she had grown quite fond of their fury family member and she petted his head gently, knowing that Tamotsu enjoyed every bit of attention he could get.
Especially from her.
Henry was reading in the fairytale book Emma had given him for Christmas and the blonde was typing a message on her phone.
She was worried about Emma and they needed to have a talk soon – probably tomorrow after breakfast – because Emma looked completely exhausted.
And Regina could not stop feeling guilty about it, because without her Emma would have never taken that job for Gold and then she would not have to work so much, would not be under so much pressure and stress.
But it had to wait till after the party, because the first guests would arrive soon.
She checked the kitchen counter once again.
The dough for the mini pizzas was ready, the vegetables were cut, cheese, salami and bacon was there as well – so the kids could choose for themselves what they wanted later.
Regina felt the dog nudge her once again and she smiled.
Taking a quick glance over her shoulder she realized that Emma was still typing on her phone and so she grabbed a piece of bacon and fed it to Tamotsu, "There you go, little bear."
The Akita seemed to be very pleased and sighed in content.
"Regina, don't feed Tamo-tsu with pizza stuff", Emma chuckled, still typing on her phone.
"I have no idea what you are talking about, dear", the brunette replied innocently, looked at the dog and winked.
The party was a full success.
The kids had fun, Henry was smiling all the time and Regina thought he would burst at some point.
She was glad that he had found friends, that he had settled into everything so well in general and from what Archie had told her he was an excellent student and all the teachers were quite fond of him.
Roland's mother Marian was talking to Emma about some charity project and although Regina was not sure if it was okay to interrupt she went over still and handed Emma a cup of coffee – the blonde clearly needed it.
"Thank you", Emma gave her a warm smile and Regina nodded, "You're welcome, dear."
That said she left the women alone once again and found Killian standing on the balcony, looking into the distance.
"Are you alright?" she asked carefully, "If you want to be alone I can go back inside..."
He shook his head, "No, it's quite alright, love. Please stay...I was just thinking...it's the first time we celebrate without Graham...and it's...hard. I miss him...we've been friends for so long...and I loved him...I..."
Tears were running down his cheeks and before Regina could think about it she stepped forward to wipe them away, "I know."
"God, I loved him so much...I still do..." Killian sobbed, "I'm such a mess...I'm sorry."
"Don't be sorry. I can't imagine how hard it must be for you...to be here today...but it means a lot to me...and to Henry...that you came", Regina replied and took his hand to squeeze it.
She had no idea when it had happened, but she had started to trust Killian. He was not only her boss, but also an incredible friend.
Working together with him had turned out to be one big blessing and it had brougth them closer together.
Sure, the knowledge that he was one of Emma's best friends and that the blonde would trust him with her life was a big help, but it did not change the fact that Regina had come to realize that he meant no harm.
"I drove the Mustang today", Killian said all of a sudden, "Graham was so ridiculously proud of that damn car...I remember the day he bought it as if it would have been yesterday. He had been talking about nothing else for weeks and it drove me crazy. He had fallen in love with some old, run down car for crying out loud. And I said if it was so important to him he should buy it...and have it restored. And he did! He jumped up right that second, dragged me with him and we drove almost sevenhundred miles to buy the damn thing. A few weeks later it looked better than new and even I fell in love with it."
He laughed out loud and Regina could not keep herself from chuckling.
"And I drove the Mustang today...and it was as if he would be still here...driving with me...like he said it would be", Killian turned his head to look up into the sky, "I hope he is happy...wherever he is."
Once they returned to the living room Regina caught sight of Emma, who was reading a story to the kids, out of the fairytale book and Killian announced that he would grab them a drink, which left Regina by herself before Marian appeared right in front of her.
"Thanks for inviting Roland, Miss Mills. He's been a bit of a loner lately, but he seems to have found a friend in Henry."
Regina nodded in understanding, but was not quite sure what to reply, but Marian continued before Regina could have made a decision, "Anyway...it was a pleasure meeting you, Miss Mills, but I'm afraid I have to go...I have plans with my partner Linda tonight. My ex husband will pick up our son."
"Yes, sure", was all Regina could manage to say, "Have a lovely evening then, Miss Locksley."
"Thank you", Marian turned to leave, but stopped mid track, "Before I forget it...I thought maybe we could set up a play date for our sons...somewhen in the future...I think it helps Roland to see that there are other kids with two moms...it has taken him quite a while to come to terms with the fact that I have a relationship with a woman now...not to mention Robin...my ex husband."
"I think a play date should be fine", Regina replied with a nod.
It was only when Marian Locksely headed for the door that her words finally sunk in and Regina's eyes grew wide.
Wait, what?
Had she just agreed to a play date for her son, because Roland's mother thought her and Emma were...were a couple?!
Her heart started racing and she could feel a wave of panic rushing through her body when Killian stepped in front of her and held out a glass of wine, which she grabbed and emptied in one gulp.
"Woah there, love...what have you done? Pissed off Locksley?"
"No...I...I wouldn't say pissed off...wait, you know her?" Regina glared at him in disbelief and Killian broke out in laughter, "Yeah, of course I do. She has this charity thing going on...one of the projects the Swans support. So, what did you do?"
Regina paled even more, "I...she...uh...she thinks...that...Emma...that Emma and I...that...we are...uh...you know..."
She could not look at him anymore, especially because Killian cringed while laughing like a maniac, "Hold on...are you telling me that Locksley thinks you and Emma are couple?"
"That's not funny!" Regina insisted.
"Of course it is..." Killian replied, still laughing, "Has it never occured to you that people could jump to that conclusion?"
"No?!" she looked at him, caught completely off guard, "Why would anyone think that? I mean okay...Emma is gay, but that doesn't mean we can't be friends...or a faaamily."
Regina's words had turned into a whisper by the end of her sentence and realization finally hit her.
Of course that would be what people thought.
How had she not seen this coming?
Her mind was rushing, everything was a jumble, a blur, "Do you think I should call Marian Locksley and set her straight?"
"Have fun trying...but from what I hear she's pretty much playing for our team now", Killian chuckled and Regina, paniced or not, had to laugh herself.
"Does it bother you that much that people could think you and Emma are an item?" he asked, all of a sudden completely serious.
"Yes...no...I don't know", Regina admitted and her shoulders slumped, "It's not that...I mean...I don't care what people think about me...hell, I've been a stripper for the most part of my life...but Emma...she has a reputation and...and..."
"Emma gives shit about people and their opinion if that's what's bothering you. She cares what her friends and family have to say, what they think...but the rest can go to hell", Killian assured her, "People gossip anyway. No matter what you do. Who cares what other people think about you and Em, love?"
"I...I..."
But before Regina could say anything else the door bell of the penthouse rang and the moment it was opened it revealed two quite unexpected guests – a smiling Christine Swan and her not so enthusiastic husband Roger.
"I'm so sorry, Regina. I had no idea that they would show up", Emma stated as soon as she had dragged the brunette to her home office, "I just mentioned to my mother that we couldn't come for brunch this weekend, because of Henry's birthday."
"It's fine, dear. It's not your fault."
"Still...I should have known. My mother is...well, complicated. She gets too excited for her own good at times", Emma sighed, "And if my father says anything inappropriate...I'll make them leave. I swear."
"Emma, relax", Regina stepped closer to take Emma's hand and squeezed it reassuringly, "It will be fine. They even brought a gift for Henry."
"Okay."
The blonde pulled her hand back and started to pace the room anyway, "It's just...it's been a hell of a week...and I...I don't know if I have the energy to argue with my father...not today."
Regina watched Emma for a few moments, but then she grabbed the blonde's arms and pulled her into a gentle embrace, offering comfort and reassurance, because Emma clearly needed it.
And if Regina was honest she needed it too.
Standing there, holding Emma close, made the tension in the room disappear, made them both relax and focus on what was important, because at the end of the day the only thing that mattered was that they had each other.
Christine had taken Emma's place to read to the children, but Roger Swan was nowhere to be seen.
Marian Locksley's assumption long forgotten Regina went in search of the one person she wished she could avoid – at all costs.
But being a part of Emma's life meant that she had to find a way to deal with the blonde's father.
They would most likely never become friends, but she was willing to find a way to get along at least.
She found him sitting on the balcony, a glass of red wine in hand.
"I'm sorry, Mister Swan. I don't mean to disturb you", she began and he made a gesture for her to take a seat.
"I'm not here to ruin your son's birthday if that's what you're afraid of", he stated dryly.
"That's not what I was thinking. I just wanted to talk to you for a moment", Regina started again, her heart rate increasing drastically with every word.
God, she was not good at talking in general, but this. This was torture.
She could not screw this up.
"I..." she cleared her throat nervously, "I just wanted to...well, I am aware, Mister Swan...that...no matter what I would say now...you would never believe me. You would never trust me. I understand that you are suspicious and you have every right...but let me tell you that I will stick around to prove to you...that I truly care about Emma."
Roger Swan just sat there and watched the city lights, which gave Regina the opportunity to take him in.
Because the first time she had seen him she had been too stressed to bother, but now that he was sitting next to her she realized how tall he was.
How strong he seemed.
Clearly he was a well respected man in this city if his dark grey power suit was anything to go by.
His face was stern, but his eyes gave him away.
They were kind and there was a spark of worry shining in them and Regina saw it for what it was.
A father's concern for his child.
"I know I was rather harsh the first time we met", he began all of a sudden, "And I assure you, Miss Mills...this is nothing personal. But you have to understand that we want what's best for Emma. She's our only child and while we might have been absent a lot...we always loved her...from the bottom of our hearts. The day we first saw her in the harbor...we knew. We knew she was meant to be ours..."
Another minute of silence.
"I regret that we've left her alone so many times...but it doesn't mean that we didn't watch out for her. We always had people taking care of her...qualified people...and she grew up to be this strong, independent woman...but then...when she met this...this Jade", his voice trembled, "We thought she was the one...she had us all wrapped around her little finger...and Emma was so happy..."
He took a sip of his wine, "The day she called me...the day she found out what this person was after...it changed Emma. The sparkle in her eyes, the sparkle that had been there all this years since I've seen her for the first time...it was gone...as if a part of Emma had died...she was so heart broken...and it took her forever to get back on her feet...I will not let that happen ever again...not when I can protect her."
Regina gulped.
She had known that it had been hard for Emma, that the blonde had lost her trust in humanity back then, but hearing the hurt in Roger Swan's voice, witnessing how much it had pained him to see Emma like that, gave the whole thing a completely new dimension.
"I'm sorry your family had to go through that. I can't imagine how terribly it must have been. Emma deserves so much better than that", Regina managed to say before her voice gave out.
"Yes, she does. She deserves better than that. And that is why I don't trust you. Because someone needs to look out for Emma...she is this good hearted person and when she really likes someone she throws all her doubts and everything out of the window...but the world isn't kind. As I said...it's nothing personal", Roger Swan stated again.
"No, I get that. Especially since I have a son myself. If it wouldn't be for my own past...I still would be wary", Regina admitted sincerely and got up, ready to leave.
"Miss Mills...for what it's worth...I'm glad you took the chance Emma offered you. That you got out of that establishment...that you found a decent job with Mister Jones."
"I'll be forever grateful, because it gives Henry a way better perspective for the future and he deserves it."
She gave him a small smile. It was not much, but it was honest and that was what mattered.
"We can agree on that. Our children deserve everything", Roger Swan replied and he nodded his approval.
The simply gesture lifted a huge weight off Regina's shoulders and she knew that she could not expect more from the man, because Emma's well being was his priority.
As it should be.
The party was long over, the guests had left and the penthouse was all cleaned up, but Emma was restless still.
She could not seem to calm down although she was so very tired and she had no idea why.
Regina was sound asleep in the guestroom, Henry was passed out on the couch with Tamotsu right next to him, but the silence did nothing to slow down her mind.
Maybe it was the upcoming event for Gold that had her so on edge, because so much was depending on it.
Maybe it was the fact that she missed Graham like crazy. She had witnessed the scene with Killian and Regina on the balcony earlier that night – out of the corner of her eye and she had been glad that Regina had felt safe enough to comfort him, because she would not have found the strength to do it.
Or maybe it was that aching feeling in her heart whenever she thought about Regina.
She was falling deeper in love with her ever day and Emma knew that at this point there was nothing she could do to stop herself from falling deeper and deeper still.
She could see herself sharing her life with Regina, raising Henry together, being a family and being in love.
So very in love that it scared her.
And yet, every day she woke up she craved for Regina's presence as if nothing else in her life mattered.
And maybe it did not.
She pulled herself another glass of wine and sneaked out onto the balcony to sit and enjoy the fresh air for a moment, wishing that Graham would be here, because he would know what to say to cheer her up.
To make her heart and mind lighter.
He would be able to help her through it all.
When she heared footsteps she turned around to catch sight of Henry, who rubbed at his eyes sleepily, Tamotsu right beside him and she had to smile, "Sorry, kid...did I wake you?"
Henry shook his head, "No. I had to pee. I guess I drank too much sweet stuff last night."
Emma nodded her head in understanding, "Want to sit with me for a minute?"
The boy ddid not reply, but plopped down on the chair next to hers and Tamotsu sat down between them and so they watched the sky in comfortable silence for a while.
Till Henry broke it.
"Emma, can I ask you something?"
His eyes were pleading and she knew right away whatever he was going to say would have her heart skip a beat, but she agreed anyway, "Sure, kid. Ask away."
"It's about my dad..." Henry started, sounding more insecure than she had ever heard him and Emma's heart indeed skiped a beat. Her gut feeling had not betrayed her.
"Maybe you should talk with your mom about that?" she suggested carefully and it reminded her that she had forgotten to tell Regina about her first conversation with Henry about that specific topic and she scolded herself. Work had been busy, but that was no excuse. She could not let Regina walk into that one unprepared.
Henry shook his head vehemently and that brought Emma back to the here and now, "I don't think I can...talk to her about it."
That got him Emma's full attention, "Why not?"
"Because I think that my dad...that he was not a nice man. I think...I think he hurt my mom...pretty bad", Henry dropped his head and Emma's heart was racing in her chest now.
How on earth could he possibly know that?
"Why would you think that, kid?"
"Mom never talks about him. Not once. She has not even mentioned his name...all my life. But she has this nightmares sometimes...it's not that bad anymore now...but it was...in the past...and how she reacts when people try to...just shake her hand or something. I know Mister Gold was not always nice to her...but still...I think it was my dad...who really hurt her..."
Emma did not know what to do, what to say.
God, she was not ready for this, she was not the person he should have this conversation with in the first place, but then again...would Regina be able to talk about it with her son?
"Please, Emma...just tell me. I need to know", Henry begged and she sighed.
"I'm sorry, kid. About your dad. And you are right...he did not treat your mom well I'm afraid", Emma stated and tried not to sound too hateful and angry, because the situation was hard enough as it was.
"I knew it. But he can't hurt her anymore, right?" Henry looked at her expectantly, eyes full of hope and it was Emma's turn to shake her head, "No, kid. He can't hurt her anymore. I promise."
"Good."
And in that moment Emma knew that he knew.
Henry knew that his father was dead without her saying it. He just knew somehow.
"What if I turn out like him?" the boy asked all of a sudden and Emma almost dropped her glass in shock.
She managed to put it on the floor and turned to look fully at Henry, grabbing his little hands, "I want you to listen to me, kid...you could never be anything like him, okay? You are a kind, loving and caring boy...your mom did an amazing job of raising you and it doesn't matter who your father was...because you are nothing like him. You never will be..."
"You sure?"
"Absolutely. Henry, you are so protective of your mom...and I admire that. But that alone proves how much you care...about her. You always want to be strong for her although you are just a kid...you're so smart...and funny...you're great. And everyone knows how much you love your mom...you'd never hurt her...I know that. And because you love her you would never hurt anyone else either...because you would never do anything to make her unhappy...or cry. I know that...you want her to be happy...and so do I...and we'll make sure that she is...always."
"Deal. But how do we do that?" he watched Emma closely.
"We show her how much we love her every day."
The words were out of her mouth before she could stop herself, but Henry only smirked at her.
"I think we should go to bed then...and do something nice for mom tomorrow...starting with breakfast?" he suggested, his smile never leaving his face.
"You know what, kid? That's an excellent idea..."
Emma had no idea how she had ended up on the couch next to Henry and the dog, but here she was – Tamotsu's head on her legs, Henry's arm wrapped around her.
And she had finally calmed down enough to get some sleep if her fluttering eyes were any indication at all.
"Emma?"
It was only a mumble, but she caught up on it anyway.
"Yes, kid?"
"I love you too."
"And I love you, Henry. You're my family."
"Me and my mom."
"Yes, you and your mom."
And then they both closed their eyes and fell asleep.
