A/N: Hello lovelies,

thanks for the great response to the last chapter.

It's so wonderful to see that you are all so invested in this story. As am I.

I wish I'd have the time to answer all your lovely reviews - unfortunately I don't, because I'll be gone over the weekend, visit family.

But I hope the early update will make up for it.

Hope you'll enjoy reading...I know the situation with our favorite ladies is a bit frustrating at the moment.

Let me assure you it's not forever.

The ladies are in a complicated place right now, but you'll see some changes - soon-ish ;)

Much love to everyone...have a nice weekend! xo


TAKE ME TO WONDERLAND

Chapter 28

Regina stormed out of the elevator and headed for the penthouse as if the devil would be after her.

She had been on her way to work when Mary Margaret had called her and had asked if she had seen Emma in the morning.

But of course she had not.

She tried to avoid Emma whenever possible, but when Mary Margaret had informed her that Emma had not shown up for a meeting and that she did not answer the phone either Regina had become alarmed.

Emma was a responsible person, she would not stay away without an explanation.

The blonde had been out with Ruby, had probably had a drink or two.

And then Regina remembered how Emma had collapsed after she had gotten drunk after their fight before Christmas, how she had suffered a panic attack because she had been so sure that she had lost Regina.

A shiver ran down Regina's spine at the memory, because she realized that Emma must feel pretty much the same now – the situation was truly painful.

For everyone.

What if Emma had gotten drunk with Ruby and something happened?

What if she was lying on the floor unconscious or...

No.

She had called Killian right then and had told him that she needed to check on Emma and of course he had understood.

And now here she was – in front of the penthouse with a racing heart, afraid of what she might find once she unlocked the door.

But it was not the time to be scared or full of doubt so she opened the penthouse door and rushed inside, just to stop dead in her tracks mere seconds later.

All she could see were entangled limbs, brunette and blonde hair and Regina wanted to puke.

God, she was so naive.

She had been worried sick while Emma and her doctor friend had...no!

She would not go there.

Regina wanted to turn round and leave when one head was lifted up from the couch and she stared right into the eyes of a confused...Ruby Lucas.

What?

"Regina?!"

"Ruby..."

It was barely a whisper.

"Regina, are you okay?"

When Ruby tried to sit up she felt the heavy pounding in her head and rubbed her temple, "Oh God..."

That did the trick and got Regina moving, "I'll make some coffee."

"Thanks! What time is it?"

"Almost eleven. Emma did not show up for a meeting...Miss Blanchard called and I thought I better check on her..." Regina tried to explain her presence although she did not even know why she felt the need to.

"She had a rough night."

Regina winced at Ruby's comment and she knew there was no point in asking what this was about, but she had to do it anyway, "What's wrong? Emma seems so sad sometimes. And not only recently."

She grabbed a mug to bring it over to Ruby, but to Regina's surprise the leggy brunette was standing right behind her, "It's not my place to tell. If you really want answers I suggest you talk to Emma yourself."

Regina nodded in understanding and wondered why Ruby appeared to be so tense, but decided that she would most likely not get an answer to that question either.

"Shit! I forgot...I need to be at work in an hour..." Ruby announced and downed the almost burning hot liquid in one gulp, causing Regina to frown.

And before Regina knew what was going on Ruby headed for the bathroom, mumbling something about Emma sure would not mind.

...

She did not know why, but she had taken a seat on the couch next to a still comatose Emma and watched the blonde once again.

It was a stupid idea and Regina knew it, but she could not stay away.

Blonde locks were covering some of Emma's face and Regina was so very tempted to move them away, but she did not dare.

But she caught herself wishing that she would be in a position to do just that without hesitating or doubting herself.

More than that she wished that she could just lie down next to Emma and sleep, knowing that she was safe, feeling the warmth she was missing desperately since this whole ordeal with Milah had started.

Since she could not do either she kept staring at Emma, wondering what it would be like if they were together.

And for a moment Regina could really picture it.

Waking up in Emma's arms, the blonde's smile the first thing she would see in the morning,...

"Regina?"

The hoarse whisper pulled the brunette out of her thoughts and she looked straight into Emma's confused eyes, "Miss Blanchard had me check on you, because you didn't show up for your meeting."

Regina thought it might be best to explain her presence once again, because Emma seemed to be a little disorientated.

A groan escaped the blonde's lips at the reminder and she tried to sit up, her hands immediately shooting up to her head, "Oh God..."

The brunette chuckled at the gesture, because Ruby had looked pretty much the same only minutes ago.

"I'll get you some coffee...you should probably call your assistant."

...

Emma had followed Regina's advise and had called into her office to instruct Mary Margaret to reschedule all her appointments, including the dinner with Milah, but to her surprise her pixie haired friend and personal assistant had already done that and Emma was relieved.

She knew she had to talk to Milah sooner rather than later, but she felt like chewed up and spit out so it would have to wait another day.

Or two.

Today she would not leave the couch.

She had felt okay when she had come home, but now not so much.

But she was glad to see Regina, was happy that the brunette cared enough that she had come to check on her when she should actually be at work.

Work...

She wanted to ask Regina about that, but right that second Ruby came out of the bathroom in nothing, but a towel, wearing a fake smile in an attempt to hide the pained expression on her face – clearly she was having a major headache too.

"Hey Em, can I...borrow some clothes?"

"Sure...you know where the wardrobe is."

Regina stood next to the kitchen counter, staring at the floor uncomfortably, but Ruby disappeared into Emma's bedroom before she knew it.

"I'll go and take Tamo-tsu for a walk. When you didn't pick him up in the morning I left him in my apartment."

"Thanks."

It was all Emma could say, because the whole situation was simply too confusing.

Things were getting out of control.

...

By the time Regina returned, the dog in tow, Ruby was already gone.

Tamotsu must have sensed that Emma was not feeling well, because he jumped right onto the couch and curled himself up right next to her without a word from the blonde or Regina.

"I better go to work then", Regina announced, playing with her keys.

"Uh...sure. Thanks for checking in on me...you didn't have to do that", Emma answered weakly.

Hearing those words Regina froze.

Did Emma really think she did not care anymore? Did Emma really think she would not worry?

How had things gotten so bad between them?

They had to find a way to save their friendship, their family.

She would worry about her feelings later.

"Do you want me to stay?" she asked carefully and her question caught Emma off guard if the blonde's dumbfounded expression was anything to go by.

A dismissive gesture, then a shake of the head, "Nah, I'm good. Go to work...I don't want to get you in trouble or anything."

But they both knew it was just a lame excuse, because Killian would never give Regina a hard time over looking out for one of his best friends.

"That's not what I asked, Miss Swan. Do you want me to stay?" Regina repeated the question and Emma stayed silent for a long while, but in the end her heart beat reason, "Yes."

"I'll give Killian a call then."

...

They had spent the whole afternoon in silence, except for the TV noise in the background.

Both of them had been aware that neither of them was ready to have a conversation about what was going on and forcing each other into talking would ruin the little bit of "peace" they had created.

Sitting next to each other on the couch was enough – at least for now.

Because it was quite obvious that their truce would not last forever as if they would be at war.

And somehow they even were.

At war with themselves, with their feelings and in some sense even with each other.

But this particular day they were as okay as they could be, considering the circumstances, sitting next to each other and finding comfort in the presence of one another.

...

Regina had made chicken soup for Emma, because the blonde's stomach was still revolting from all the whiskey.

Thankfully dinner had been far more relaxed than the last couple of days.

Henry had noticed it too and had been overjoyed that Emma and his mom seemed to be working through whatever it was that was going on.

Although he had a fairly good idea what was going on.

Well, at least he had a theory.

And he would check if he was right, because if he was his mom clearly needed help.

...

Emma had went straight to bed after dinner and Regina and Henry had taken Tamotsu for a walk to end their evening with a bit of fresh air.

Now they were both sitting on his bed, because Regina had promised Henry a story, but when she was ready to start reading Henry took the book out of her hands and closed it before he looked his mother straight in the eye, "You really like Emma, don't you?"

To say that Regina was startled by her son's question would be an understatement.

"Yes, sweetheart. I like Emma, but don't you know that?"

"No, mom. I mean...you like Emma...like like her. Like Roland's mom likes her girlfriend", Henry stated carefully and Regina's eyes went wide, "Henry, that's...no. You're wrong...Emma and I...we're just..."

Henry frowned.

Yep, this would be a piece of work.

"So, it doesn't bother you that she is dating Milah?"

Regina's face darkened instantly at the mention of the doctor. She wanted to deny it, she wanted to tell Henry she was happy for Emma, but she could not bring herself to say it out loud, because the truth was that she did not want that British...whatever...anywhere near Emma.

"That's what I thought", Henry grinned.

"Henry, it's complicated, okay? You don't know...", Regina tried to convince her son to drop it, but he would not have any of it.

"Mom, I might be only ten, but I'm not blind, duh."

A small smile appeared on Regina's lips although she felt more like crying, but Henry was simply too adorable, "I know. And I also know that you are too smart for your own good. Or mine."

"So?"

"So what, Henry?"

He looked at her expectantly, "Are you going to tell Emma?"

A heavy sigh, "I can't. Henry, please understand that this is not easy for me."

He took her hand and squeezed it, "I understand that, mom. Just know that if you and Emma would want to be together...I'd be fine with it. I think she is awesome and she treats you well. That's all that matters."

A single tear escaped Regina's right eye, overwhelmed by her son's concern for her well-being, "Oh Henry..."

She hugged him close, "I wish it would be that simple. I have no idea if I will ever be able to have a relationship...and even if...Emma has Milah...and..."

"She's not in love with Milah!"

"Henry, you don't know that..." Regina tried to reason with him.

"But I do. I do know. Because she said it herself...just the other day. When we had dinner without you...after Milah left", he started his rant, "She said that she likes her, but that it doesn't feel right...and that she would always choose you...that she would always choose us over anyone else."

Regina did not know what to say to that.

First of all because she had not even been aware that Henry had known about Emma and Milah dating, but clearly he had. Otherwise he would not have started this conversation in the first place. He really was a damn smart kid and she remembered once again to never underestimate him.

And second because Emma and Milah seemed to be a great fit.

Why would the blonde not try to persume anything with her?

Hell, this...Milah...she was pretty...she was a doctor with an outstanding career...her family was wealthy and she obviously really liked Emma. What more could the blonde ask for?

The Swans would love to see her by Emma's side for sure.

"Think about it, okay? You don't have to talk to her right away...but maybe one day?" Henry suggested and Regina sighed once again, "Maybe...one day. But I don't promise anything, okay? Because I don't want to lose Emma as a friend...in case she doesn't...and then everything becomes even worse than it is now..."

"I get that", he answered, but Regina honestly doubted that he did.

"Please, Henry...you can't tell anyone. Or do your famous scheming or something. I'm not ready for this kind of...thing", she pleaded, begged almost and he hugged her instantly, "Your secret is safe with me. I love you, mom."

"I love you too."

...

Regina could not sleep.

She had rolled around in bed for almost an hour – to no avail.

Her conversation with Henry had been overwhelming, especially since he had taken her by surprise.

She would have never seen this coming.

A part of her wished she had denied everything, wished that she had told her son that he had gotten it all wrong, but she had made a promise to herself when Henry had been born.

She had promised to never lie to him if not necessary and the only time when she had witheld information had been when it had come to his father.

She had not lied, but she had not told him the truth either, because she had not said anything at all.

Lying about her feelings for Emma though – it had felt wrong since he had already figured it out anyway.

Realizing that her son would be supportive of the both of them had given her some kind of much needed peace though and she felt calmer now.

And yet again she could not sleep.

Because she was thinking about his words, about him pointing out that Emma would always choose them.

The blonde had said pretty much the same thing to her as well, but hearing it from Henry, hearing him so confident and full of believe in Emma, made it real.

And now Regina's mind was playing the famous 'What if...' game, robbing her of her night's rest.

What if she found the courage to tell Emma?

What if Emma returned her feelings?

What if not?

What if they would be a couple? Could she handle it?

She doubted it.

Did she want it?

Well, at least a part of her did.

When she had first realized that she was falling for Emma she had freaked out.

It had scared her to death.

But the more she thought about it the more she got used to the idea, especially now that Henry had given his 'okay'.

Just in case.

Probably she should tell Emma, but Regina knew that she could not.

She was nowhere near ready for a conversation like this.

And there was Milah.

Whether she liked it or not.

For now she would try to save their friendship, because if today had proven one thing, it was the fact that their bond was not completely broken yet.

It was fragile, but it was still there.

And that knowledge was what provided enough comfort for Regina to drift off at last.

There was still hope.

...

Since the summer holidays were not far away anymore and Henry had managed to convince Regina to let him go camping with David and Mary Margaret for a few days she found herself in need for a shopping trip to get some proper outdoor clothes for her son two days later.

And since she had no idea where to go and what to look for Regina had asked Emma for help.

Maybe it would be a good way to get rid of some more of the awkwardness between them.

She just had to ignore her growing feelings and act "normal".

And she had to pray that Emma would not bring up the doctor from overseas or Regina could not guarantee for anything.

At least she felt up to saving their friendship – thanks to Henry.

Even if she could not tell Emma what was going on, talking about it with her son had taken the edge off and now she did not feel so tense anymore.

Thank God.

...

When Regina and Emma got out of the cab they were both laughing and it felt good.

They had spent an afternoon at the mall, buying camping gear for Henry and having a lot of fun in the process.

Emma could be such a goofball, it had made Regina forget all her worries. At least for the time being.

Sure, there had been some awkward moments here and there - where they had stared at one another and neither of them had known what to say, but all in all they had spent a great time as the friends they were supposed to be.

Regina had stolen some glances when she was sure that Emma would not realize it and she was proud that she had been bold enough to do that at least.

It was something.

It was a start.

A start of what she was not sure yet.

For now it did not matter.

They had made plans to cook dinner together like they had done countless times in the past and Regina looked forward to it.

And so did Emma – that much was obvious.

They headed for the entrance of their building, countless bags in hand, Emma following right after Regina, when the brunette was hit by a sudden realisation, "I knew I forgot something! We're out of..."

She turned around, almost bumping into the blonde, who was only mere inches away, simply because Regina had stopped unexpectantly and Emma had not managed to react faster.

"Red pepper flaaakes..." Regina's voice became a whisper when she met Emma's eyes.

Eyes that were sparkling curiously, so very intense in color and telling a story of their own.

She was captivated by them, not able to blink, nor to move.

Neither was Emma.

Regina could feel Emma's breath on her face and the tingling sensation surprised her more than she cared to admit.

It would be so easy to lean in, but she would not dare, not even in her wildest dreams.

Emma seemed to be struggling for composure as well, blinking frantically now, obviously in an attempt to get her mind under control – her eyes were locked on Regina's though.

One moment of bravery, one moment of courage was all she needed to do something, say something that could change everything.

Maybe it would be her one and only chance.

Would she ruin everything by taking it?

What if the banter from today would not last?

Because Emma had a feeling that it would not last for long.

Today she had been able to push her feelings for Regina to the back, but they would not stay there.

And then?

What would be tomorrow?

What if Regina's strange mood would return and somehow she was even sure that it would – sooner or later.

It had been a good day though.

She should be grateful. She was.

Would it be stupid to say something?

Yes.

But it was also stupid to stay silent.

She blinked again.

Regina had not moved from her spot, there noses were almost touching.

All background noise had disappeared when they had connected in their own little bubble.

As if the world would stand still.

This was it and Emma knew it.

Now or never.

"Regina..."

Her voice was trembling.

She wished it would not be.

"I need to tell you something...", Emma rasped out with force.

God, she did not have the strength for this.

"Regina, I..."

And then the brunette's face darkened, a wave of pain washing over her eyes and Emma's lips pressed together while her own eyes grew wide in confusion.

Seeing the hurt in Regina's usually warm, brown eyes made her heart ache, made her chest clench and Emma did not understand what just happened.

Until she heard a familiar voice with a certain accent, "Emma, I'm sorry for the interruption...but I really need to talk to you."