A/N: Hello lovelies,
I wish everyone who is celebrating MERRY XMAS!
And on top of it all I got sick as hell. I'm feeling pretty miserable at the moment.
But I thought I'd update anyway...since everyone is suspecting drama in Wonderland.
And we all need a bit of drama here and there, right?
I hope you enjoy the chapter...I'm almost certain it's not what everyone is expecting.
Thanks for all the love and support of for this story!
You are all amazing!
Much love,
Raven
TAKE ME TO WONDERLAND
Chapter 35
To say that Regina was a nervous wreck was an understatement.
When Emma had told her that the Swans expected her to come to dinner she had wanted to run away and hide, but of course she could not do that.
No matter what Roger Swan had in store for her – Regina was very much aware that she had to face him and deal with it if she wanted this relationship with Emma to go anywhere at all.
But of course that was easier said than done.
Luckily for her Killian and his monologues about how awesome of a wedding Neal would plan for Mary Margaret and David and how much of a genius the handsome wedding planner was in general had kept her distracted for the most part of her work day, but now that she was standing in front of her wardrobe she felt like puking.
Henry would be spending the night over at Roland's place and considering that she might be a mess after this dinner it had been a smart decision to agree to it.
Marian Locksley had been so excited to see her it had been almost ridiculous.
Now that she thought about it she had to chuckle though, because not too long ago she had wanted to have a talk with Marian to set her straight about her relationship with Emma being nothing, but a friendship.
Well.
A glance onto the alarm clock made her jump.
She barely had half an hour to get ready and she still had no clue what to wear.
Clearly she could not show up in jeans and a simple shirt, but she did not want to be overdressed either.
A knock on the door had her out of her thoughts in an instant though and she hurried over to pull the door open, sure it would be Emma.
And it was, but what Regina had not expected was the startled look on the blonde's face, "Uh..."
"What?" she watched Emma in confusion till it finally hit her that she was not wearing anything, but a bra and panties and she blushed furiously, "I...apologize."
"No need to", Emma chuckled sheepishly which made Regina blush even more, "Let me guess...you can't decide what to wear?"
Regina nodded and stormed off to her bedroom all of a sudden, Emma following right behind her.
"Just wear something you are comfortable in", the blonde offered, sitting down on the edge of the bed.
"Easy for you to say", Regina growled, "You always look like you'd jumped right out of a fashion magazine."
Emma got up and made the few steps over to her, moving a strand of hair out of Regina's face, "You are beautiful...you know that, right?"
"I...thank you."
Emma only smiled at her and stepped back, "I'll go sit in the living room and wait for you to get ready, okay?"
Regina nodded, aware that they had been so awfully close only a second ago and it impressed her once again that Emma always managed to treat her with so much respect, never even trying to push her into something she was not ready for.
She truly was one lucky woman.
In the end she had decided to wear a dress in a darker shade of red, because she loved it and it made her feel a bit more self-confident.
And she would definitely need that tonight.
The whole drive to the Swan mansion was a silent one, simply because Regina could not manage to say a word.
Her nerves were slowly getting the better of her.
And once the huge estate appeared in front of them her eyes grew wide.
That was where Emma had grown up?
Good God.
Emma put the car in park right in front of the staircase that led up to the main building and joked, "Perks of being the daughter of the house."
When Regina did not respond she took her hand and squeezed it reassuringly, "It will be okay. We can leave any time...just say a word, okay?"
"Okay."
Christine Swan already awaited them when they arrived at the front door and Regina had to admit that she would not have expected that.
She had thought some servant would probably let them in, but she was positively surprised to see Emma's mother instead.
"It's good to see you again, Miss Mills", Christine announced with an honest smile and offered her hand to Regina, who took it immediately, "Thank you for the invitation, Misses Swan. And it's Regina."
"Very well...Regina. Please call me Christine then."
That said Emma's mother led them through the house, right into the living room, where she offered them a drink, but Emma declined because she was driving and Regina did because she was sure if she would start she would get hopelessly drunk out of fear what Emma's father might want from her.
Or them.
But before she could worry about it any longer the man in question entered the room and Regina realized there was no escape anymore.
"Emma..." he went over and pulled her into a hug, "How are you?"
"I'm good, dad. Just been really busy lately", the blonde wiggled out of her father's embrace, chuckling, "You wanna choke me?"
He chuckled as well, "I'm sorry. I got a bit too excited over seeing you it seems."
"It's okay", she smiled, glad that her father seemed to be in a good mood.
That was the man she knew and loved, the one she knew how to handle.
Roger Swan turned to face Regina, "Miss Mills. Thanks for coming."
She shook the offered hand, aware that her own hand was trembling, but Emma's father did not comment on it – thankfully.
"Please, call me Regina, Mister Swan. And thank you for the invitation."
He nodded in acknowledgment when Christine Swan clapped her hands together, "I think dinner is ready. Let's go."
Impressive was not nearly enough to describe the Swan mansion, but Regina had not expected anything less.
The whole furniture, the decoration, everything was really exclusive and fit well together and was chosen wisely.
Once seated at the dining table Regina finally calmed down a bit although she feared the almost friendly greeting had only been the quiet before the storm.
She could not put her finger on it, but something was up.
Dinner started out in silence, but it took not long till Roger Swan began asking questions about Emma's current projects and seemed satisfied when she told him that everything was going well, especially with the new deals she had gotten lately.
"You haven't forgotten about Ingrid's charity event at the opera next week, have you?" Roger asked all of a sudden and caught Emma off guard.
Of course she had not forgotten about it. How could she?
She had attended that specific event every year since she was fourteen.
"No, I haven't. I already filled out my check", she commented with a smile.
Her father nodded in appreciation, "You don't mind accompanying Elsa, do you?"
"What do you mean?" Emma looked at him dumbfounded.
"Well...Ingrid told me that she broke up with her girlfriend only recently...so I suggested that you could accompany her. You know how Ingrid is...her nieces are everything to her...and since you're single I didn't think it would a problem", Roger stated as if it would be the most obvious thing in the world.
Emma dropped her fork, "I...uh...dad, I'm not sure that's a good idea."
She looked towards Regina helplessly because truth be told she had no idea what to do.
They had agreed that it was too early to tell the Swans about their blossoming relationship, but her father had put her in an impossible position.
"Why not?" Roger eyed her in confusion, "You always liked Elsa..."
"I do like Elsa, but...can I think about it?"
Christine chimed in, sensing that there was something Emma had not told them, "Of course, honey. Just let us know tomorrow."
Emma nodded and took a deep breath.
"The other thing I wanted to talk to you about is...you know we're presenting our new cruise ship on New Year's eve..."
"Yes, dad...I know. You're talking about it constantly although it's still months away", Emma chuckled.
"I want you there with us. Your mother and I will go on this first cruise and I want you to be with your family", he announced, making sure that this was not up for discussion.
And yet Emma could not keep quiet, "Dad, I...I'd love to go and I think it's going to be beautiful, but I'd rather spend New Year's eve with..."
"Regina and Henry. Yes, I know", her father interrupted, "That's why I invited the both of you for dinner...to talk about that."
Regina almost choked on her water.
Here it comes.
"What do you mean?" Emma eyed him warily, fearing the worst from one second to the next.
"I knew right away I would not get you to agree to going...because of your commitment to Miss Mills and her son...that's why your mother and I decided we might invite her and her son along. In case that's okay with her?" he looked directly at Regina, who basically squirmed under his gaze.
"I can't accept that. It's too much, really. And I don't want to intrude on your family vacation, but thank you", she managed to say after a minute, but Christine shook her head, "It's not a problem. It's our own ship after all. And you're welcome, Regina. Otherwise we wouldn't have suggested it."
She did not know what to say, because that was not what she had expected, not at all.
But then she felt Emma's hand squeezing her knee and she finally snapped out of it, "Thank you. I think it would be nice...to go on a cruise. My son would be thrilled. He loves everything about ships."
"Is that a yes then?" Roger asked curiously.
"It's a yes", Regina nodded.
"Emma?" he looked at his daughter expectantly.
"Uh yeah...fine with me. Count me in."
"Very well", her father seemed pleased, "I'd like to talk to you in private for a minute once we are finished with dinner, Miss Mills."
Of course it had been to good to be true.
He would probably tell her that he expected her to "fall sick" right before they would leave or something like that.
Never would Roger Swan allow for her to go on this cruise for real – that Regina was sure about.
"I won't lie to you, Miss Mills...I'm not too happy that Emma is so attached to you", Roger Swan said as soon as he closed the door to his study behind her, "But you already know that. I have to admit that Emma is a lot happier lately nonetheless. And that's why my wife and I decided to give you a chance...to prove to us...that you are trustworthy. And we can't do that when we never get to see you. Because let me tell you...I will have an eye on you, is that clear?"
"Of course. I completely understand that", Regina answered quietly.
Roger Swan intimidated her to no end and that would not change any time soon.
"Good. Your son...Henry is it if I recall correctly...is he really that into ships?" he asked all of a sudden, catching Regina by surprise once again.
"Yes. Henry is obsessed with ships since I can remember."
Roger Swan seemed to think about it for a second, "One of our ships is in for repair at the moment and I'm going to check on it before it gets cleared to leave again. I could give him a tour if you want to."
"I...I'm sure Henry would love that", Regina managed to say, not sure about his motives.
"Alright. I'll let Emma know about the time and date as soon as I know", he grabbed a book from one of the shelves and handed it to Regina, "Give this to your soon. It was my favorite when I was his age."
She took the book, an old copy of Moby Dick and met Roger Swan's intense gaze, "I will."
He did not let go of the book though, eyeing her even closer, "And now, Miss Mills...tell me...how long has this been going on?"
"I'm not sure I understand..."
"You and Emma...you aren't just friends, are you?"
Regina contemplated to lie for a moment, but she was aware that Roger Swan probably already knew and how should she ever gain his trust if she lied him straight in the face?
And so she took a deep breath and braced herself for the storm that would inevitably follow after her answer, "No...no, we aren't."
"So you did lie to me when we first met."
"No! We really didn't. Emma and I...we've only started seeing each other as more than friends recently. This is all new for us. Especially for me. I never thought...that I would fall in love again. At all. And surely not with...a woman. But Emma...she's...I don't know how to explain it. She's everything."
Regina was not sure if it made any sense at all to someone else, but her – then again she was not prepared for this kind of conversation with the father of her girlfriend just yet.
And it was not supposed to happen anyway, but here she was.
"I hope you are serious about this, Miss Mills. Because if you hurt my daughter you will regret it."
And with that Roger Swan let go of the book.
"I assure you, Mister Swan. I've never been so serious about anything in my life. I know you might not believe me...but I would never intentionally hurt Emma. Doesn't mean I never will...simply because people sometimes fight and then they say something stupid and it hurts. But I would never betray Emma like her ex girlfriend did. I'm not after her money...I never have been. I'm here for her...because she is the most amazing person I've ever met", Regina stated and was proud that her voice sounded as strong as she had intended to.
"Alright."
They had driven home in silence not long after Regina's conversation with Roger Swan because she had no idea how to tell Emma that her father knew about them being together.
She should have never told him, at least not without Emma being there to or knowing about it and Regina feared the blonde would get mad as soon as she found out.
Entering the penthouse she felt as nervous as when they had left for dinner with Emma's parents and Regina was aware that it was not a good sign.
Because Emma would ask what was wrong eventually and she tended to snap when she felt cornered.
She put the book Roger Swan had given her on the couch table, sat down and took a deep breath.
"I hope my father did not insult you or anything" Emma said and took a seat right next to her.
"No, he didn't."
"Well, good. He better not treat my girlfriend like crap or else", the blonde smiled, "He knows, doesn't he?"
Regina nodded and dropped her head, "Yes. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to tell...but he asked me and I thought lying would only make it worse."
"Hey", Emma took her hand, "I'm not mad at you. I'm glad you decided to be honest...because you are right. Had you lied to him it would have been a disaster."
"So we are good?" Regina glanced up and Emma simply pulled her into a hug, "Of course we are. I'm proud of you. I know my father can be scary."
Emma had been quite surprised when Regina had announced that she wanted to stay with her that night, but had agreed gladly.
They had ended up sleeping on the couch again though, simply because they had kept sitting there for a while once they had changed into their pajamas, enjoying the view out of the floor-to-ceiling windows while they talked and had been too lazy to move in the end.
And she did not care where they slept as long as she got to hold Regina in her arms, because to Emma it was the best feeling in the whole world.
Regina wanting to be with her was like a miracle to her still and she enjoyed every second of it, no matter the pace.
The next two weeks took quite a toll on them both, especially after that charity event Roger Swan had mentioned at dinner.
Regina had insisted that it would be alright if she would take this Elsa as her "date", telling her that she trusted her and that Emma should have fun since she would not be able to go anyway because of a night shoot she was working at.
She would not even have gone if she had been free, simply because it was not Regina's world and Emma knew and respected that.
But once Regina had seen the pictures in the newspaper – pictures of Emma laughing and smiling, enjoying the event and the company of Boston's high society – doubt had started to eat away on her.
Emma belonged into this world, but she did not.
What if they were too different after all?
It had taken Emma a few days to figure out why Regina had been so distant, but once the cat was out of the bag she had assured her time and time again that she did not care about this life.
That she did enjoy seeing some of the people she had met at the charity event because she had known them her whole life, but that she could live without all of it.
That Regina and Henry meant more to her than anyone else ever would.
That she would give up all of it in a heartbeat because all she needed to be happy was her family, was Regina.
And Henry.
Since the last two weeks had been busy at work and had also been an emotional roller coaster of sorts Emma and Regina had decided that they would stay in on the weekend.
Henry would spend it at David's and Mary Margaret's, who had volunteered to take the boy to see Emma's father and the ship he had mentioned to Regina.
The blonde truly was too exhausted to go there and so was Regina.
In the end they had taken Tamotsu too at Henry's insistence and Emma was thankful for it.
She had thought about ordering take out, but Regina had only glared at her and so she had caved and went grocery shopping with Regina's shopping list in the end.
Looked like they would be cooking together again.
Oh, how much she loved it.
Cooking with Emma had always been something she had thoroughly enjoyed.
From day one.
It had always put her at ease, no matter how difficult or exhausting a day it had been.
Standing next to Emma in the kitchen now calmed her nerves immensely.
Regina was aware that she had been awfully tense lately.
She worried too much.
She had caught herself overthinking the whole situation more times than she cared to admit.
Her sessions with Wendy Darling had helped her a great deal and Emma being as patient, supportive and understanding as ever had done the rest to make it possible for Regina to settle into this slowly blossoming relationship with Emma emotionally.
Unfortunately her fears had a chokehold on her still and made it impossible for Regina to move forward.
She had been so frustrated by herself the last couple of days, but Emma had been there for her all the same.
Emma had been the rock she had needed from the moment they had first met at The Rabbit Hole all this months ago if Regina was honest.
Emma.
A smile appeared on Regina's face while she stirred the chicken curry they were cooking.
Emma had saved her and more.
Emma had given her happiness and freedom.
Safety and warmth.
A home.
And love.
Regina turned around and caught sight of her leaning against the kitchen counter, chewing on a piece of pineapple and she could not stop the chuckle that left her lips.
"What?"
Emma feigned innocence, but Regina was not impressed and took a step towards her, "I told you not to touch those because I need them for the curry."
She put her hands on her hips and glared at Emma playfully.
"But..." the blonde seemed to contemplate her answer for a moment before she continued, "They are delicious...and I'm starving."
Her expression was childlike and carefree.
Regina shook her head and chuckled again.
God, Emma could be such a kid.
"Well, we can't let that happen, now can we?" she challenged, causing Emma to shake her own head 'no', a smirk appearing on the blonde's face because she believed she had won.
Regina made the few steps over to her, took a pineapple cube out of the bowl, watching Emma, who was focusing on the piece of fruit in anticipation, out of the corner of her eye.
Emma's eyes followed the pineapple holding fingers until Regina plopped it into her own mouth in one swift move.
"Hey!"
The pout on Emma's face was heart melting and Regina almost caved.
Almost.
She kept chewing enthusiastically though, "You're right. They are delicious."
"You're evil", Emma whined.
Raising an eyebrow Regina countered, "Am I now?" a devilish grin on her face.
She enjoyed this playful banter they would occasionally engage in.
It always made her heart lighter.
"You are. But I wouldn't have it any other way."
Regina's smirk turned into a warm smile at Emma's loving comment, because she knew it was sincere.
Emma smiled as well, looking absolutely radiant, her eyes sparkling wildly, almost blinding Regina because of their close proximity.
Regina became aware of how close they actually were when she reached out to move a strand of hair out of Emma's face.
God, Emma was so beautiful.
She was so lucky to have her.
And while Regina stared at Emma, who's confident smile had turned into a shy one, the whole situation shifted as well.
Gone was the playfulness, replaced by a cloud of appreciation and emotion.
And before reason could stop her once again Regina cupped Emma's cheek and closed her eyes.
When she felt Emma's hands on her lower back, carefully holding her like the precious treasure Emma considered her to be, Regina knew that it was time to jump.
And so Regina leaned in to meet Emma's lips for the first time.
The moment they did her knees went weak, but Emma's strong arms held her upright and kept her safe like they always did.
It was just a simple kiss.
And at the same time it was so much more.
It felt like the touch of a feather.
Unbelievably soft, but powerful enough to make her shiver.
The sensation tore her apart and glued her back together at once.
It soothed the wounds of the past, made whole what had been broken.
This simple kiss, this gentle touch of lips shattered Regina's world and everything she believed in.
It blew her mind and healed her heavy heart.
This first, simple kiss connected her with Emma in a way that ran even deeper than her feelings and made them one.
It was not just a simple kiss at all.
It was everything.
