Hi again…
I guess writing that letter did help somewhat, since I'm here writing to you again. Or maybe I just…feel really guilty. Probably both.
Maybe you'd want to hear how Leaf's doing? I know you two were really close. He's been chosen as a dragonmancer apprentice. Yeah, I know you hate the idea too. To be honest with you, the two of us hate it as well.
I'm sure his reasons are vastly different from mine. He's still adamant on becoming a dragonslayer - he's been training by himself time to time, too. I'm getting more worried, but the last time I brought it up with him, he just ignored me and said that he "had to do it." I really wish I knew how to help him, but…yeah…
If you're wondering why he's becoming a dragonmancer apprentice, it was mainly my idea - or my fault, if we're being exact. I wanted him to infiltrate them myself, but…I think the dragonmancers have some level of hatred for me, after I tried to interrupt their ceremony. So I asked Leaf to do it. And he's not happy with me about it, either.
So that development is going just great.
I've been trying to convince myself that I did the right thing, but…I don't think so. Grove's been trying to tell me otherwise as well, but that isn't working either. I really wish I could believe him, but I can't. What if they do something to hurt Leaf like they did to you? It'd be all my fault again, and I don't think I could forgive myself for letting something like that happen. I can only hope that nothing bad happens at this point, since mom and dad are pleased about it (though in my weak defense, they had been pushing the idea for a while now). Moons, I'm sorry that we got further involved with the dragonmancers in the first place. I can imagine your frustration with us right now, and I can't blame you. If it was up to me, I would've taken Leaf and left the village by now, but…
I still have three other siblings to protect, as well as my friends (yeah, friends…shocking, I know). I can't just leave them here. I hope you can understand that.
On the bright side, I did make a new friend? Or best friend? That's what she's been saying, anyways. Well, we accidentally became friends, but…that's besides the point. Her name is Cranberry. She's…actually one of the nicest people I've met. Okay, it doesn't seem like it means much considering the majority of the people I've met, but not my point. I haven't told her the whole story yet (or any of it, really), but she might just be the sweetest person I know. She's been so understanding and enjoyable to be around…I think you really would've liked her, Wren. I should probably stop gushing about her, since I don't want you to suffer like you did whenever I talked about Grove.
Bluebell's also been doing a bit better since I last wrote to you. She still doesn't really want to talk to anyone, but she has been taking a few walks lately, and is eating a bit more. I have tried reaching out to her, and I'm pretty sure she didn't want to talk to me, but maybe she's happy that I'm trying to help her out? Maybe? I don't know, but maybe I can fix that if I keep trying…
I'm trying really, really hard to leave this off on a positive note. Things have just been so stressful with the dragonmancers and Leaf, and that's not even touching the whole thing going on with our parents (they aren't…they happiest with me for hanging out with Grove and Cranberry, I suppose - I don't think they'll ever warm up to "those outsiders," as they called them). And I really just want to give up and collapse already. But because I know if I give up now, you'd probably just yell at me…I'll try my best to just make it through tomorrow.
Your just barely managing to survive sister, Rowan
