Chapter 11 of In Love & War

The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.

Author: Isabelle

Summary: Post 1.13. Chuck Bass left New York after he lost Blair and Nate in one day. Years later, a deep economic crisis has left the world broke, and the only family in the UES with money left is the Bass family and its sole heir: Chuck Bass. Eleanor convinces Blair to marry Chuck for his money, but all the feelings Blair left buried a long time ago start to surface when she realizes he's not the man she thought he was. CB. NV.

Disclaimer: I own nothing, not Gossip Girl, not any quotes/lyrics used.

Rating: PG-15

A/N – A special thanks to the ever lovely Tatiana for her BETA.

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He seems to be a god, that man
Facing you, who leans to be close,
Smiles, and, alert and glad, listens
To your mellow voice

And quickens in love at your laughter
That stings my breasts, jolts my heart
If I dare the shock of a glance.
I cannot speak

Sappho

It's not that she disliked horses or anything like that – she hadn't been thrown off an animal like Hazel had, or sold one for coke like Ms. Sparks. She just had other things to do. Be Queen B, for starters. That had occupied nearly all of her time. Hence, she hadn't been interested in riding anymore. Her pure-bred Diana (yes, like the Princess), had long ago been sold when her father realized her interest lay elsewhere.

Yet thinking of all of the land out there and the beautiful mountains made an exited quiver run through her stomach. So she woke early, like she promised Chuck she would, and got ready for a morning ride.

When she got out of the bath, she found Dorota and her mother in her room.

"Doctor coming in afternoon to see your mamma," Dorota told her, and Blair nodded, walking towards her mother.

"Mom?" She asked her, kneeling before Eleanor, who was dressed impeccably in vintage Armani green slacks and a soft ivory cashmere sweater. Eleanor turned and stared at her.

"Blair!" Eleanor smiled at her.

Blair sighed in relief. "Do you like it here?"

"It's a bit chilly," Eleanor informed her, pointing to the goosebumps on her hand.

"We'll get you a shawl," Blair stated and turned to find Dorota already coming over with one, wrapping it over Eleanor's slight frame.

"Oh… Burberry…" Eleanor commented, touching the patterned cloth.

Blair smiled. "The doctor's going to come see you. If I'm not back by then, you'll be good, right?"

Eleanor stared at her and rolled her eyes. "I'm not a child, Blair."

Blair stood up and stared down at her. "Fine."

"I'd like a window," Eleanor suggested purposely.

"Dorota, there's sitting room off the dining area – take her there. Chuck says there's a view of the village," Blair informed her, and Dorota nodded, taking Eleanor with her.

"Be careful, Miss Blair," Dorota said over her shoulder, but was interrupted by an eager Ruby carrying some clothes with her.

"Good morning Miss Blair." She gave her a small curtsey, and Blair smiled.

"You don't have to bow. I'm not royalty," Blair told her, pointing to the bed for her to deposit the clothing.

"These were left for you." Ruby watched Blair as Blair admired the riding breeches, knee-high boots, fitted black jacket, gloves, and matching hat.

"You'll look wonderful on Hera," Ruby continued, still smiling.

"Who's Hera?" Blair asked her.

"The mare Lord Bass has picked for you, she's so very pretty. Lord Bass says I can ride her when I'm older." Ruby watched as Blair changed into her new clothing, helping her with the zippers and buttons.

"Don't you go to school?" Blair asked her.

"Oh, yes!" Ruby nodded. "All the kids go to school – we attend Constance in the village four times a week. I'm fluent in French, and Lord Bass has been teaching me some Japanese, but I think they're just curse words."

Blair laughed, taking the gloves and hat from Ruby.

"How do I look?" She asked her.

"Like a Barbie!" Ruby beamed at her.

"Good enough." Blair patted her head and headed out the door with Ruby following her every step and never stopping to take a breath as she chatted about anything and everything.

When they finally made it out, Jacob was there, holding the door for them.

"Good morning, Miss Waldorf." Jacob nodded, and Blair stopped to stare at him.

"I think I should properly thank you," she said, and Jacob looked taken aback.

Blair swallowed, feeling she should explain. "For Japan and for Chuck. For what you did. It was very decent of you."

Jacob looked pale and opened his mouth to respond, but then closed it, thinking better of it.

"If there's anything Ma'am needs, I do hope she doesn't hesitate to ask?" He arched a brow at her, and she nodded, smiling.

"Keep an eye out for my mother and Dorota, please – do have someone get me if it's something serious, and I'm not back," she insisted, and he nodded, showing her out into the stables.

As Blair descended the steps, a coal-black Arabian came trotting out of the stables with none other than Chuck Bass perched high on top of it. His hair was tossing in the wind and he wore a simple form-fitting polo shirt with riding pants and knee-high boots.

Though Chuck had also been in their little horse-riding group when they were younger, and his father had owned the most impressive collection of pure-breeds, he was never one to really love riding the horses. He was more a fan of pursuing the female jockeys that rode them.

But he did always know what he was doing, and if she was going to be honest with herself, she thought he looked stunningly handsome perched like he was.

Ruby let out a dreamy sigh. "Isn't he handsome?"

Blair bit back a smile as she slid on her hat and gloves.

"Good morning, Miss Waldorf," Chuck greeted her, smirking down at the girls. "And Miss Laurent, you are looking prettier every day."

Blair watched the young girl flush a furious pink color as she hid behind Blair.

"Stop it, Chuck," Blair chided.

Out of the stables came a short man with a grandfather beard and a thick argyle sweater, and behind him trailed a stunning Palomino mare with a silky coat and a white diamond patch on her nose. Her eyes were light caramel as she blinked at Blair.

"Oh, she's beautiful!" Blair said, adjusting her gloves a she walked to her. "I heard her name is Hera."

She threw Chuck a glance which he avoided, pretending to pet his own animal.

The man holding Hera smiled at her.

"So you're the pretty bride, eh?" The man asked in a slight Scottish accent.

Blair gave him a tight smile. "Blair Waldorf."

"Connor Grant at your service, Ma'am." Mr. Grant tipped his hat. Ruby peeked behind Blair's form and smiled at him. "I see Miss Ruby has taken a liking to you."

"Yes, she has." Blair nodded and then leaned in. "Oh, and thank you for the magic beans. They were most helpful last night."

Mr. Grant let out a loud belly laugh. "Can never be too careful."

Before Mr. Grant could give her a lift, a horse rode past her so fast that it upset Hera. Blair quickly pushed Ruby away from Hera's startled hooves, and Chuck jumped down from his own horse.

Blair was out of a breath when she looked to find Clara happily mounted on top of her horse, looking innocently down at her. Blair's mouth dropped opened, but she turned to Ruby, who looked pale and scared and certain that she didn't want to be on a horse any more.

Mr. Grant tried to control Hera, but the horse was not having it, and Blair felt Chuck's arms around her as he pulled her and Ruby out of the way.

"Are you alright?" Chuck asked, startled himself, as he studied Blair and Ruby.

"I-I'm fine. Ruby?" Blair was looking at the little girl.

"I'm ok." But her voice was small and pale compared to the usually warmth it carried.

Chuck looked up at Clara. "What are you doing?"

"Apologies, Sir." Clara was all wide-eyed innocence. "I didn't mean to startle the mare."

Chuck turned to Blair, who was holding Ruby to her, her own heart still beating furiously.

"Maybe you should stay," Chuck said.

Blair considered it for a moment, almost afraid of getting on Hera, despite the fact that Mr. Grant seemed to have a handle on her now. But Clara's ears perked up, making Blair's eyes narrow.

"I could ride with you, sir – if you like," Clara offered. Chuck's eyes were still on Blair, whose lips were now set.

"No need," Blair replied. "I will be fine. Ruby, go see Dorota and ask her to tell you a story."

Ruby slowly nodded, her pigtails moving with her. "Yes, Miss. Blair."

Jacob quickly scurried forward and took the child's hand. "I'll take you to Miss Dorota, Ruby."

Blair took a sharp breath and turned to Chuck, a smile plastered on her face. "Shall we?"

Chuck looked over her, still unsure as to what to think. A moment a go she had looked frazzled, completely taken by surprise. Now she looked determined. It was downright confusing… And sexy.

Chuck offered his hand. "M'lady."

She smiled indulgently at him as he walked her to the horse and helped her up a now tranquil Hera. The moment she was up, she felt at ease. The animal calmed under her slight weight, and she relaxed her legs against her.

"Ready?" Chuck asked, looking up at her, his hand resting on her thigh. She felt every inch of his hand as it made her skin prickle and rise to meet him under her thin pants.

She nodded.

"Clara, Mr. Bass and I will be fine on our own. No need for an escort, Blair smirked at the girl, who provided a new definition of 'if looks could kill you, I would beat you with my horse'.

"Mr. Bass and I always ride together to oversee the village in the mornings," she snapped back, but Chuck had already mounted his black Arabian and nodded at Blair.

"No need, Clara – I'll have plenty of companionship today."

Blair met his eyes, and a dark shiver went through him as she did the unexpected: she pressed her knees firmly against the mare.

"C'mon, girl!" And the mare was off, in such speed that her hat flew off and all her curls cascaded behind her.

Chuck's heart sped up – he did love a good chase. His lips smirked and his eyes narrowed, and he was after her in a heartbeat.

Clara was left all saddled and staring after them.

Blair hadn't felt this liberated in such a long time. She felt like singing and dancing and throwing her hands to the wind. She looked behind her and, sure enough, Chuck was chasing after her with a smirk on his face.

She felt a thrill of exhilaration and urged Hera to go faster.

"Faster, girl!"

Her body easily remembered the feel of a running horse under her as they galloped through the grassy area with mountains surrounding them and the warmth of the sun appearing in the horizon.

And before she knew it, he had sped past her, his hair as wild as her own. He looked over his shoulder, smirking.

She gasped, a smile plastered on her face, and urged Hera along – intent on beating him at whatever game it was they were playing.

He hadn't felt so very alive in such a long time. Usually his morning rides consisted of Clara's droning voice updating him on all aspects of the village. This time, it felt like an adventure. Just Blair and him, riding around, no agenda – just seeing where the day would take them.

She was just as good as he remembered, perched high on the pony her father had gotten her for her birthday. She always wore her hair back, pulled in by a red bow. He remembered.

Now she was a woman, still all fire underneath her cool exterior – hot enough to burn Chuck Bass. Hot enough to melt him.

And he loved the chase – when he saw her hair flash in the wind as she threw a flirtatious smile over her thin shoulder, he was a goner. He needed to play. His entire being begged him to play with her, because she was intoxicating.

So he chased her down, flew past her, and challenged her. And if he remembered anything about Blair Waldorf, it was that she never backed down from a challenge. And suddenly he felt seventeen again.

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The village of Wallace Hills was a peaceful place, reserved for those who had been saved by a man people knew very little about as he seldom let them see the real man behind the façade.

Yet they all looked forward to his morning rides. It was a chance for them to tell him what was going on or simply to make a generic conversation. So when the two horses came into view with a playful 'Lord Bass' and his new bride-to-be, it became the talk of the town.

The villagers watched as they played with one another, casting glances back and forth. He would get ahead of her, and she would purposely speed past him. He would lose sight of her only to find her hiding behind a home, chatting with a villager, and the game would be up because they couldn't chase one another in the presence of mere mortals.

"Who lives here?" She asked, galloping past him.

"Jonas," he replied, urging his horse to catch up with her.

"So far away from the village?" She asked, staring at the small cottage.

"He's our warning system," he explained. "Ex Navy seal."

And sure enough, Jonas himself walked out of a small side garden. He was a tall – broad shouldered man. Chuck's warning system.

"Mr. Bass," the man nodded and greeted.

"Jonas, morning," Chuck's horse came to a stop with Blair next to him.

Jonas studied Blair, and his eyes questioned Chuck.

"Miss Blair Waldorf," Chuck introduced them, and Blair nodded, trying to tuck her wild curls behind her ear.

"Ahhh, you're the one no one can stop chatting about?" He smirked at her.

Blair nodded, smiling herself.

"Jonas has a good view of the ocean, come see," Chuck said.

"The ocean?" Blair asked, confused.

Chuck nodded and dismounted his horse, walking it behind the cottage. Blair followed his lead and walked Hera behind her.

"Leave 'em here," Jonas urged them as he took the reins, and Chuck nodded gratefully. He continued his trek with Blair in tow over a small hill located behind the Jonas home.

There was nothing out here, Blair noted. She wasn't distracted, of course – not by how well Chuck fit into his riding pants. She wasn't.

Once they stood over the hill, Blair's breath stopped. What a view!

"You'll get a better view from behind the ruins," Chuck assured her as she stared, mystified, over the peek of water seen from between two great mountains. The sun was fully out, but the chill facing the water cooled her from the heat she'd felt riding around.

"We really are away from everything, aren't we?" She asked softly.

He turned to look at her, her hair was disheveled and her cheeks were pink from exercise.

"Yes we are." He nodded and cleared his throat. "C'mon."

She nodded, following him down the hill and back to the cottage. Jonas was studying Hera's hoof when they walked to him.

"You've got a lame mare here, Miss Blair," he told her, setting the horse's leg down and watching Hera limp.

"Oh!" Blair looked concerned then looked for the house, which was too far away to see. There was no way she could walk.

Chuck sighed. "Walk her to the house, Jonas – I'll take Miss Blair," Chuck instructed, and Jonas nodded. Chuck swiftly mounted his horse as Jonas began walking Hera back.

Blair watched as Hera was taken away from her with a slight frown on her face. When Blair looked back at Chuck, he was a bit away, looking on over some other homes.

"What are you doing?" She asked him.

"Have you ever been pulled to a horse?" He asked her, a small devious smile on his lips.

She smiled, shaking her head. "No. Where was I going to be swept off my feet? In Connecticut?"

He let out a laugh. "Fair enough."

And then he kicked his horse and the animal jumped up and started a full gallop ahead.

"What are you doing?" She cried.

"C'mon!" He cried back, leaning over his animal as she looked on with wide eyes.

"No!"She ran away from his impending form. She heard him laugh behind her. "Stop it, Chuck."

"If you continue running away, I'm just going to have to grab you," he teased, and she squealed when he came near her once more, running. She turned suddenly, and he was nearly on her. Before she knew it, he had grabbed her arm and pulled her up swiftly onto the horse. She slid in behind him in a huff, grabbing on to his waist as she yelped.

"Chuck!" She cried.

She saw him smiling as he tossed a look over his shoulder at her and placed his own hand firmly over hers. That's when she relaxed into him as they rode towards the house.

"That wasn't so bad, was it?" He asked, still smirking as she pressed her cheek to his shoulder blade.

"I suppose it was kinda heroic," she murmured.

The villagers now watched as Mr. Bass pass through the village in his horse with a Miss Waldorf riding closely behind him.

"The wedding is happening soon, I take it?" They asked each other.

"It better."

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They galloped to the house, and Blair watched the people milling around, doing their everyday activities as they looked on atop of the horse.

"It's so lovely here… I can see why you never wanted to leave," she whispered quietly, and he didn't say a word. Not one. She did study his profile. At moments, she thought she saw him. Small and vulnerable, still a boy, still longing for affection. At others… He was lost even to himself. It wasn't that she wanted to rescue him back. It was just that she noticed.

He led the horse around the house and towards the castle that protected the house as she held onto him.

The castle stood high, almost twice as high as the house, and three times wider. It completely covered the house, and she realized it was just not coincidence. The place must've been at least seven thousand years old. It was stunning and breathtaking.

"It was originally built to protect against the Vikings," he said as he stopped the horse upon reaching the ruins. He threw his leg over the saddle and dismounted the horse, then turned to look up at her. She held out her arms, and he grabbed her waist, helping her down. They reached an awkward moment as they stood entirely too close to one another, his hands on her small waist, her hands on his shoulders. Their faces together. The ruins of a castle around them.

She felt short of breath and, this time, there were no magic beans, no fairies to blame it on. The wind whipped around them as he stared at her with those intense brown eyes of his.

"Chuck…" she whispered. She had no idea when she had become so very attracted to this man she was agreeing to marry.

He seemed to blink and quickly dropped his hands from her waist, turning sharply. She let out a breath she didn't know she was holding as she watched his retreating figure. Her heart was beating furiously and her legs felt shaky. Good thing she had no heels on.

She followed him through the ruins, taking in the magical splendor of the stone around them. He continued through the crumbled building until he reached the edge, and that was when Blair realized they were at a cliff.

She gasped, looking out into the angry, intense sea.

He turned to her and studied her expression as she gasped, entranced by the sight. He remembered the very first time he saw it – he had been speechless, and that was when he realized this is where he wanted to be. The perfect place for forgetting.

"What is this place?" She asked softly.

"I don't know…" he replied, placing his hands on his waist. "But it's beautiful."

She nodded in agreement.

"So…" he began. And she raised a brow. "I was thinking of Sunday."

"Sunday? For what?" She asked, confused.

"The wedding," he explained.

"Oh," she responded, eyes wide. "Four days."

He nodded slightly. "It doesn't have to be anything big," he assured her.

"Oh," she continued.

"And you have the dress… And we have take advantage of my priest… Who is also the doctor," he rambled as she stared at him.

This was so business-like, she hated it.

"O-ok." she answered, and he nodded, turning on his heel and walking back to the house with purpose. She stared after him, blinking and not knowing exactly what to think.

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When she got back to the house, she found Dorota and her mother in the room where she'd left them. Dorota looked concerned as a man finished, putting away things in an old-fashioned black bag. The man turned to her and smiled.

"Miss Waldorf, I presume?" He greeted.

"Yes. How is she?" Blair went straight to business, observing as her mother continued drawing on her pad, endless designs.

He took a breath. "May I speak with you privately?"

Blair's stomach dropped as she nodded, and she led him to a corner of the room, away from her mother's ears.

"Miss. Waldorf… Your mother suffered from a slight stroke…" Blair felt numb. "… It was minor, yes but it caused the disorientation and the memory loss."

Blair took a sharp breath and willed tears not to come to her eyes as she pressed her hand to her mouth. Her mother…

"I think it must've happened recently. I don't have the proper equipment here to properly analyze the situation but… From what I can tell, she is most likely suffering from vascular dementia… Caused by this stroke."

Blair sat down, staring ahead as the doctor looked concerned at her.

"Is there anything we can do?" She whispered.

He shook his head slowly. "Not with what we have… And once it happens, you can't reverse the effects. I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news."

Blair looked at her mother, drawing happily on her pad, pausing at times, confused.

A stroke. Her mother had a stroke, and she was completely losing it.

"T-thank you for coming," she managed to tell him.

"I'm sorry I can't do more. Lately I've mostly been helping with broken bones and childbirths…" he continued.

"I don't need you for the childbirth," she snapped, and he looked at her in confusion. She nodded and stood to walk to her mother. She sat next to her and watched her draw.

"Mom?" She asked Eleanor, who stopped, pulling her glasses from her nose.

"Yes?" Eleanor asked her, looking at her like she was a stranger.

"What are you doing, Mom?" She asked softly.

Eleanor sighed, as if she was annoyed at one of her interns. "For Christsakes, Dorota – I'm working on my designs for Bergdorf."

Blair blinked as Eleanor turned back to continue scribbling. She gulped and closed her eyes. Her mother was slowly leaving her, and she would be the last of the Waldorfs.

"Miss Blair…" Dorota came to her, concern and unshed tears evident in her eyes.

Blair quickly stood and walked out of the room, determination on her face.

"Where's Mr. Bass?" She demanded of the first maid she found.

"I-in his room," she stuttered.

Blair thanked her and headed to her room, making long strides with her short legs. She passed Clara who was walking down the hall, and the woman fixed her with an icy glare.

Blair walked right up to her.

"The stunt you pulled this morning? You will never do it again." She deadpanned, and Clara's eyes narrowed.

"You have no right talking to me this way," she snapped.

Blair arched a brow. "Clara…" she said loudly. "Do begin the preparations for Sunday."

"Sunday?" Clara asked, annoyed.

"Oh, didn't you hear? The wedding will be Sunday. I expect everything to be just perfect, and all preparations go through me." Blair smiled sweetly at her.

Clara's eyes widened as Blair walked swiftly past her. Blair entered her room, a sense of satisfaction covering up the fact that her heart was breaking. It was a welcome change. She walked to their connecting door and yanked it opened.

She walked down the small hall and knocked at his door.

"Blair?" He asked from the other end, confused.

"Yes, open up," she requested.

He slowly opened the door to reveal that he was missing his polo shirt and was now only in riding pants and boots. She gulped because he was a far cry from the boy she had known. Chuck was never one to be chunky, but he had never been sculpted like Nate had been. He had a normal body, lean and well shaped. But this Chuck before her was a man. He still had the chest hair he was always proud of, but he sported a well-defined hip bone and a flat stomach with a slightly sculpted chest.

She was not turned on.

She was not.

Shit. She was.

"I-I just wanted to let you know," she stuttered, almost angry. "Sunday is perfect. We should begin preparations today."

He studied her.

"Sunday it is," he nodded, leaning back and staring at her.

"Good," she snapped and strode down her own hallway, slamming the door behind her.

Shit. She hissed inside of her head.

Her mother was sick, and she was lusting after her almost-husband.

She had not counted on the preparations taking over her life. But they did. The moment a date was set, the house became a flurry of activity. Blair was bombarded with everything from the food that Pierre was preparing to the flowers they could get this time of year.

Before she knew it, the day had passed and she was left exhausted on the bed and back to thinking about the fact that she had an ailing mother. The wedding was a welcome distraction, and that's why she had urged it. She needed to not think about the fact that she was losing her mother. Or had lost her already.

She slept restlessly that night. She didn't know why. She woke later than usual. In New York, she had been used to waking around 6 am and helping Dorota out. This was a change of pace. A definite change of pace.

Her comforter felt strange around her. She blinked, sat up and gasped, a scream erupted from her throat. Because her beautiful Badgley Mischka vintage gown that Chuck had bought her was cut up in chunks and sprinkled all over the bed.

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To be continued