Come on, Edelgard thinks to herself, wiping away the cold sweat from her brow she thought was a myth until tonight. Just relax and Byleth will be able to get insi-"Nn! O-ow ow," Edelgard cries, gritting her teeth dangerously hard as her head drops backward into her pillow. Soft lips immediately kiss her cheek in apology. When the emperor's eyes open slightly, she can faintly make out the worry on her wife's face. It's nearly pitchblack in the room as per Edelgard's request. Of course Byleth tried arguing this at first.

"But El I've washed your body myself. I know your scars by heart." Byleth had stopped arguing the second Edelgard met with her teary eyes that night. The empress knew then that it wasn't negotiable, but the empress also knew it was just another wall she'd have to work to either break down or climb over with time.

Yet there are bigger issues on the table.

"El I really didn't believe you when you said you were tight," Byleth whispers, trying not to aggravate her already hypersensitive wife. "...But now I see you were telling the truth." Byleth winces for Edelgard as she pulls her middle finger out from between Edelgard's legs.

"Ah-urgh. Dammit!" Edelgard slams her fist against the headboard and it rattles against the wall far too loudly. Byleth hardly gets a chance to duck out of the way when Edelgard abruptly sits up, covering her breasts with the crimson quilt that's as soft as a rabbit's hair. "Why must my body be so-so useless?! All I ask of it is to be able to be made love to. So why? Why can't anything about myself just work?" Edelgard slaps a hand over her face and whimpers from high in her throat.

"You work perfectly, El." Edelgard sucks her teeth and angrily lifts her eyes toward Byleth.

"Don't coddle me," she snaps. "I can do nothing in my life properly but work myself numb!" The emperor kicks the sheets off of her legs and stumbles out of the bed, reaching for her robe that's set out on a white armchair just a few feet from the bed where her and Byleth typically read to each other from (that's always especially effective on Edelgard once Byleth wakes her from a bad dream).

"You don't have to yell," Byleth calmly reminds her, trying to keep her eyes wide so she can get as much of the faint blue moonlight that peeks out from the curtains to reach her pupils. "And it's only the third time we've tried this, Edelgard. I'm sure you'll become looser with time."

"I don't want to have to wait to be able to give myself to you. I've waited years. Years!" Edelgard shouts, striking a match and lighting a candle stick on Byleth's side of the bed. Once the small bit of light illuminates Edelgard's face that's marred with a deep and bitter frown, Byleth holds her tongue. The empress gives her steaming wife a minute before she gently takes Edelgard's hand in hers and pulls the emperor into her lap. She's pleased that Edelgard doesn't fight her, yet she's even more thrilled by the feeling of Edelgard's thinly covered body pressed up against her own naked skin as she hugs her tightly.

"It's ok. We'll figure this out," Byleth assures her.

"I just hate…" My body. Myself. I don't know why you choose me still, Byleth. The empress can almost sense the bitterness right off of Edelgard's tongue, and she frowns deeply up at her wife.

"I love you," Byleth breathes, trying and failing to think of something better, stronger, to say in a heavy moment like now. She rattles her fist at her side, feeling heat in her chest makes its way onto her face as her breath catches in her throat. El I love you and I don't care if we can never have this part of our relationship. I want you… but if this isn't meant to be, I can accept you still. "...I'm sorry," Byleth relents, wrapping her arms around Edelgard's waist and pulling her in closer. Edelgard relaxes into it at last, putting her arms around the ones on her waist. They let the silence settle over them while their minds stir.

Even with five months of marriage under their belt, they struggle with giving up the privacy of the last few thoughts they hide from everyone but themselves. Edelgard's scared of the honesty; Byleth just doesn't know how to be open. A desperate itch demands Edelgard's attention someplace in the recesses of her mind, asking her what that fear is even founded upon. Byleth loves me. She's seen me at my worst. She's by my side everyday as we forge the path ahead for Fodlan's future. When we kiss I feel light, free, unbothered. As she thinks to herself, Byleth's fingers dance along Edelgard's thigh over the top of her long nightgown. As minutes go by, Edelgard relaxes even deeper into her wife's hold, asking the empress to spread her legs and lean back against the rickety headboard. The emperor sighs in relief as she entertains her fingers with Byleth's, encouraging her to continue her petting by nudging Byleth's other wrist.

"El."

"Mm," she hums with eyes closed.

"I don't want sex." Edelgard blinks and slowly turns towards her wife. Byleth seems to mentally stutter when she catches the subtle hurt in those lilac eyes she adores so much. "I… don't want something that hurts you more than helps you." Edelgard bites her lip, holding back whatever her brain tried to spew out without enough thought behind it. And maybe that's Edelgard's problem, anyhow; she can't do anything without thinking about it ten-thousand times. The damage was already done anyhow, because Byleth takes her hiccup as agreement, and for once, Byleth winces, frowning afterward as she dodges Edelgard's eyes.

"Byleth?"

"It's fine." Shff. Tppp. Before she knows it, Edelgard's getting pushed away, and Byleth huffs before pulling the sheets up to her ear, turning her back to Edelgard as she begrudgingly wishes the emperor a good night. Edelgard groans aloud, rubbing the bridge of her nose.

"What exactly are you upset about?" Edelgard asks, losing her temper far too quickly. Oh Goddess this is going to get out of hand isn't it? Byleth says nothing. "Oh come-Don't be childish now."

"I'm not the one holding myself back," Byleth mumbles. There's a bitterness there that Edelgard's never heard from the empress before, and a shocked spark zips through her veins before she grits her own teeth and digs her fingers into the velvety sheets pooling around her waist.

"The problem here is that my body is too tight. I physically can't Byleth."

"Sure. And I get that. But you won't open up to me emotionally either. What's the point of even having sex if you can't even talk to me?" And instead of reacting normally, taking in what Byleth's trying to say, Edelgard dismisses her, smacking a fist against the mattress.

"As if you're any better with your lack of-" Byleth sits up, straight as a nail and stares Edelgard in the eyes with all the seriousness in the world. The emperor shuts her mouth immediately, regretting words that were spoken between the lines.

"I'm trying to be better," Byleth hisses, trying and failing to hold back her anger that's bubbling up inside her stomach like boiling water with heat turned up as high as can be. "When are you going to try, Edelgard?"

"Hah! When do I have time?! Were you not there just last week when Faerghus tried to attack us again? Does it look like I have the pleasure of time to work on anything about myself?! What does it matter anyhow?" Edelgard coughs, waving her hand through the air as Byleth sadly tightens her lips and gets out of the bed. "Don't walk away from me now. You don't leave this room unless I tell you to," Edelgard declares, sounding completely detached as she takes on the persona of the uptight emperor she has to be. Byleth shakes her head in disbelief as she backs away, stopping when the back of her leg bumps into the chair she threw her clothes on from earlier. Frantically does the empress take off her clothes and get into her daytime ones. "Byleth. Did you not hear-"

"-Just stop," Byleth bleats, getting her royal black and burgundy jacket buttoned up, leaving the cape for her shoulder out of the equation. "Do you even hear yourself right now, Edelgard? Talking to me as though I'm anyone else-El I'm me!" Byleth slaps her hand against her chest, leaning forward for emphasis. Edelgard's hands stop shaking with aggravation just so they can wrap around her own torso. It feels like she's coming in on herself now, the whiplash of her emotions throwing her into a hole she doesn't know how to crawl out of. "Dammit," Byleth sighs, clenching a fist and pressing it against her face as hard as she can. "I lied, Edelgard."

"...You lied?" she asks fearfully, hugging herself even tighter as her knees come up to her chest on the bed. Byleth hasn't taken her fist away from her face as she stands there in her royal coat and her pinstriped pajama pants, and Edelgard can tell the empress is on the verge of crying as she swallows jaggedly outloud. The last time she cried was… when her Father died. "I'm selfish for this, and I know I am, but you not wanting to tell me the truth after everything I've done for you and you alone..." Byleth finishes with a long exasperated sigh that Edelgard can feel in her own bones. "Why can't you just open yourself to me like you did before? Even when we were student and teacher, you told me about your past, your trauma, and you let me in and trusted me enough to stand against the Church right by your side! But now, after we married, after we swore our vows and announced our titles to the world, you still can't let me in. When was the last time you even let me hold your hand in the throne room? When was the last time you didn't stop me from talking about our relationship in front of the Eagles? ...Why don't you love me as much as I love you?" Byleth finishes, tears falling from her eyes that she roughly dabs away.

Edelgard's jaw is just about touching the floor as tears litter her own eyes, yet there's that disgusting pride still in her chest keeping her from saying she's sorry, and instead, Edelgard says not a word, hurting herself, but hurting Byleth triplefold.

At her lack of response, Byleth sniffs back an uglier cry and turns her back to Edelgard, kicking off her pants and replacing them with fitted slacks that tuck into her tall boots that Hubert can't ever seem to tear away from her. Byleth's rushed footsteps crashing down against the floorboards hardly covers up her ragged breath before she turns the handle and pushes her body out, slamming the door shut as she goes.

…..

…..

Edelgard slaps a hand against her face much like Byleth did, whimpering, "I hate myself."

Hours Later, Lunchtime:

I'm a terrible communicator when it comes to my emotions. I can hardly even admit that to myself, so telling you, Byleth… it's so painfully difficult.

….

Byleth stares at her, one brow quirks as she stands in front of the emperor, hand on her own hip. Edelgard blinks herself back to reality rather bluntly. Right. I called her here to say these things. Out loud! Not… ugh. As Edelgard fiddles with her crimson gloves, wringing her hands together, Byleth glances around the gardens they're standing in. She had been here before the sun rose, hiding away here amongst the treasure trove of flowers she and Bernadetta have managed to grow here throughout the end of the war when they'd pass by the palace until now. It was an impressive front, and the friends had goals to expand it to even greater proportions once fall came around and Petra could bring them back all-year-round flowers from Brigid where she and her husband Caspar reside now. Just next to where Byleth heel digs into the lush grass is her favorite part of the garden, and it's a spot she's sweat over for hours a week as she delicately tended to it; it being the patch of carnations which widely varies in color, all for the sake of Edelgard.

Every morning, Byleth brings her wife a single carnation set delicately on a wooden tray that carries either lunch or dinner depending on what meetings they sit through. Why she does it? Just to see Edelgard smile at her. Her heart sinks. I miss seeing that smile, she realizes as her eyes refocus on Edelgard's face, zooming in on the purplish bags under her eyes. Soon Byleth feels this irrational guilt over it, thinking, if I just let her get out her frustrations at me, we wouldn't have fought, and she'd have slept fine. I should have stayed quiet. I should have kept my mouth shut. What I'm feeling doesn't matter if-

"My heart? Are you listening to me?" Edelgard asks, still wringing her hands together. Her pale cheeks are faintly dusted red purely out of frustration, though it isn't helping that the blazing summer sun is beating down on them without the cover of a marble gazebo.

"I was thinking," Byleth admits, shrugging lightly before guiding Edelgard into shade and pulling out the emperor's heavy garden chair for her. Edelgard was about to sit down, but then she snaps right back up, gawking at Byleth with an accusatory finger up in the empress's face.

"Stop doing that!"

"...Doing what?" Byelth asks, scratching the back of her pencil straight neck. Edelgard drops her hand and pulls the other chair out, offering it to her wife who stares at her blankly.

"Sit." Byleth obeys, just to hear Edelgard sigh again. "...I just ordered you to do something so needless."

"It's fine."

"I don't believe you when you say that," Edelgard mumbles, sitting in her respective chair rather dejectedly.

"But I like doing what you say. It's fine."

"Byleth do something because you want to, not because I tell you to."

"...But I want to do what you say," Byleth reiterates, tipping her head to one side like an innocent puppy. Edelgard holds back her cooing but it certainty isn't the time for that. The emperor pulls herself together, snapping her fingers beside her thigh just loud enough for herself to hear.

"What you said yesterday," Edelgard starts pensively. "About doing what I say… you meant that."

"I just… I'm not mad about doing what you say El. Far from it. I guess it's just… nevermind. It's fine," she sighs, crossing her arms tight. Edelgard brushes a hand over her knee and leans in.

"Byleth this has to go two ways. If we want to be better together, we need to work on communication don't we? So please, tell me what you're feeling."

"Only if you tell me what you're feeling," Byleth counters, fixing her wife with her blue gaze. I'm thinking too many things, Edelgard muses to herself, crossing her legs as a distraction. Although it seems the empress is having a hard time saying anything really, and they sit in silence, both fiddling with their clothing. Edelgard notices this skittishness and rolls her eyes at her own folly. "It seems we both don't want to rock the boat. Ironic, isn't it? Seeing as who we are and what we've done."

"But the war was different," Byleth argues, leaning on the table before getting up and putting her chair closer to Edelgard's. Once she's seated again, she hesitantly brushes her hand against Edelgard's, looking at her eyes for acceptance, to which the emperor agrees. The sense of elation Byleth feels flood throughout her spine at just the simple touch is comforting. She never thought of herself as one to constantly seek physical touch, but when it comes to Edelgard… she feels a lot of things she never thought she'd feel.

"Our conviction led us through," Edelgard says, agreeing as she nods. "Though now," she lowers her voice, and her warm breath brushes against Byleth's jaw. "We really do need to focus on us as well as all of our work. I… what you said yesterday, when you thought I… didn't love you as much as you-"

"-I didn't mean it," Byleth tries, turning her head to Edelgard's and accidentally brushing their noses together. They don't comment on it, only moving the barest amount apart so they can see in focus.

"I think you did," Edelgard refutes quietly. "Something in you thinks that's so, and I-argh. It hurts me like nothing else to know I'm making you feel such a way, my light." Edelgard trembles for a second, desperately grabbing at Byleth's arm so she can pull her close enough to whisper in her ear. Her paranoia of someone she doesn't trust overhearing them always burns in the back of Edelgard's mind, so her eyes dart around her periferary. "I hate that I'm the kind of person who has to be told I hurt someone for me to see it, but I am. And I'm so sorry," she whispers, pressing her lips against Byleth's earlobe. The empress hears her words, feels them, understands their meaning, and her body squirms closer, seeking more of what Edelgard is willingly giving. To that, Edelgard stuffs her face into the crook of Byleth's neck, wrapping her arms around her firm torso.

"El." Byleth snakes her arm around Edelgard's back while the other pulls the emperor's waist closer in until they're embracing tightly. "I can't stay mad at you for more than a few seconds, you know? I'm sorry I fought you at all." Edelgard chuckles without humor.

"You're allowed to be upset with me," Edelgard reassures her, pressing a kiss to Byleth's neck that causes the empress to shimmy back and forth in her seat. There's always that ticklish itch under her skin when Edelgard does that. Edelgard pulls back, grinning at her wife that's quite obviously avoiding her gaze. "Though… you are hard to stay angry at for me as well, my light." Byleth grins back at her this time, and the emperor's heart pounds incessantly under her battered ribcage. The proximity of their bodies out here in the gardens where anyone can stumble upon them would usually trip Edelgard up, but not this time. The tip of her pink tongue flicks against her lush bottom lip, and Byleth's eyes snap right to it as her head leans forward a bit more. Edelgard parts her lips instinctually, feeling the sting of her wife's eyes looking right through her before Byleth turns her head away and rubs the tip of her long nose. Such a nervous tick reads as childish nervousness, and Edelgard finds it more enduring than anything in the world.

"How are things in Faerghus today?" Byleth abruptly asks, still looking off to the side.

"Lo-" Edelgard shuts her mouth just as quickly as it opens. She nearly ordered Byleth to look at her. What is my obsession with telling her what to do, now? This has to end. Byleth tips her head slightly, clearly wondering what would even make someone so sure of every word suddenly inhale them. With the gentleness given to a kitten, Edelgard hooks a finger under Byleth's jaw and urges her to face her again. The slightest quirk in Byleth's brow can be read as surprise or amusement, but it matters not. Anytime cobalt meets lilac, Edelgard's world stops for at least a handful of seconds that she would never trade for any grail. "Things are better," she finally responds.

"I-I see." Byleth swallows, and she's staring at Edelgard's mouth again. "...Is Hubert mad at me?" Edelgard laughs abruptly, and Byleth lips quirk upward at the sound.

"Why on Earth would he be, my light?"

"Because I was busy out here in the garden while you had to do the meeting alone." Edelgard shrugs it off, answering with an easy-going,

"I care not. If he is, he can pout to himself, yes? As long as we are alright, which we are…?" Byleth nods. "Then Faerghus and everyone else can perish for all I care." Byleth chuckles for a second before wiping the smile off of her face.

"You can't say that, Emperor of Fodlan." The empress picks at the arm of her chair, eyes slightly glazed over.

"I do mean it," Edelgard sighs, putting her hand over the one Byleth is using to fiddle with things. "None of this matters if you aren't happy."

"...Yeah," Byleth murmurs, looking… very mixed up someplace deep down. To which Edelgard frowns and bites her lip.

"Please, tell me what's on your mind." Byleth takes a massive breath, flipping her hand over so she can interlace her fingers with Edelgard's (and yeah that still feels just as good as the first time).

"When I went to Garreg Mach last week," Byleth starts, "I noticed the few locals left were glaring at me, even if I was buying a hefty amount of materials from them. And the week before that, when you and I had to go to-well what's left of Arianrhod, I just… noticed how many people glared at your back or, I mean there was that one man who tried to throw a rock at me. Not that he hit me… but still."

"Sorry. I must cut in," Edelgard declared, sitting straighter. "Someone tried to assault you? I'll kill them. Why did you not-"

"-El that's not the point," Byleth explains, slouching over. "I just don't understand how you deal with all of this attention. Good or bad. I can't even walk down the street here in Enbarr without someone chanting my name and claiming I'm some hero."

"You are a hero. Are you doubting what we fought for? I… I suppose you're really seeing it now." Byleth looks up, taking in Edelgard's rigid posture and squeezing the emperor's hand. "I'm sorry I got you into this."

"Don't say that," Byleth argues, speaking quietly. "I don't regret the outcome, I just hated the buildup."

"As did I," Edelgard reveals for the first time. Usually she avoids spilling any of her feelings about her decisions during the war, but the broken look souring her expression says it all; the guilt she has for the lives she's taken eats away at her nightly. The hunch in Edelgard's back shows the wear and tear of day and night battles that stretched for days. The clenching of her fist in her lap shows her aggression, all waiting to explode at any moment. That wrinkle in her brow mirrors the one she wears as she sleeps, no doubt dreaming of terrible things she's seen or done with her own battered hands she won't let anyone but Byleth touch. "I still can't imagine it having gone any other way. The uproar we're seeing now in Faerghus just proves how unwilling people are to let change happen. Imagine if Claude had tried it his way, laying down 'law' over Fodlan from Almyra. Tch. Each section of Fodlan would have been serenely festering a plan to upheave his rule. And if the church had won, nothing would have changed, and that literal monster of a woman would have slayed people left and right for so much as questioning her too pointedly." Edelgard finishes with a huff, adjusting one of the horns attached to her hair out of habit.

"I think you're right," Byleth says, brushing her fingers against Edelgard's face and kissing her forehead. "It's just… all hard. I guess I only feel it now that I feel in general."

"I see."

….

"What about Dimitri?" Byleth asks, nervously pursing her lips once the words leave her mouth. Edelgard's face goes cryptically neutral, and Byleth knows it's just her mask coming back up. The neutral, authoritative flame emperor that holds the weight of the world without a single ounce of hesitation for anyone to spot. Anyone except Byleth, who abruptly stands up. Edelgard glances up at her before she's being pulled along towards one of the palace doors.

"Where are we going?"

"To go dance," Byleth answers, grinning at the emperor over her shoulder. Edelgard looks disgruntled, trying to take a huge step forward so she can keep up with Byleth and not look like a mere pet (but once she gets next to Byleth, the little devil smirks and walks at a speed she knows Edelgard's short legs can't quite do). She's really trying to play with me at a time like this, Edelgard begrudgingly muses, crossing her arms as she follows after the bizarre woman she married.

GGGSH-KKT!

"After you," Byleth says, holding the door open with her foot. Edelgard rolls her eyes and shoves Byleth in first, chuckling all the while. "You can't say I don't try to treat my emperor right."

"Uh-huh." Edelgard folds her hands behind her back, stalking her way to the center of the ballroom that's more massive than the established one at Garreg Mach. I still remember the first time I walked in here, Byleth thinks, grinning as she walks to each massive window with a gold drapery pull rod to open the deep red curtains. And wow, the golden light that pours into the room stretches on and on through the grayish diamond floor and up the dark bricks of the walls, casting shadows that come to life and dance like Byleth wants to. Once she's finally done, setting the stick down with a satisfied huff, she sees Edelgard up on the small platform in the center of the room, sitting at the piano bench with the cover still over the keys. Ah. That's right.

"You gonna play something, El?" Edelgard smiles at her faintly, holding a hand out for Byleth to hold, which she does. The empress playfully pinches Edelgard's hip, earning a little squeak before the emperor scoots over and lets her wife sit down, thigh to thigh.

"You know… back at the Academy, well I hesitate to say it was good, but I… made a song. For you, really."

"What?" Byleth asks, ears perked up. "You never told me. That's amazing."

"Don't get ahead of yourself. I'm not about to burst into song no matter how much I love you."

"Oh come on, baby."

"'Baby,' hmm?" Edelgard points out, resting her hand on Byleth's knee. "You've never called me that before."

"It just slipped out," Byleth claims, voice raspier than before. It… really turns Edelgard on when Byleth sounds like that. Edelgard squeezes her legs a little closer together and runs a free hand up Byleth's chest, tangling her slender fingers in blue hair seconds later. Byleth just about purrs as Edelgard leans in, pressing one slow kiss to the empress's lips.

"I wonder what else might happen to slip out," Edelgard jests, playing with the top button of Byleth royal top. Byleth's jaw drops slightly before she laughs under her breath.

"I like this side of you."

"You just like seeing me nearly naked," the emperor insists jokingly. Byleth smirks, not bothering to deny it.

"I also like hearing your voice, watching you move, feeling every bit of you. I can keep going."

"No, no," Edelgard coughs, cheeks turning red. "Um. Did you actually want to hear the song?" Byleth nods, rubbing Edelgard's back encouragingly.

"Please."

"Uh." Edelgard rubs her bare neck, bashfully lifting the keyboard cover with her other. "G-give me your right hand." Byleth does. "Set your fingers here, and…" Edelgard sets her fingertips over Byleth's, pressing down on them as the keys sing for them. "Start with C, and…" Edelgard repeats it again, and then once more, before Byleth remembers it herself this time. "Well done, my light. You keep doing that. And… I'll mentally prepare myself for embarrassment." Byleth laughs and kisses Edelgard's white haired temple.

"These are romantic goals for some."

"For who?" Edelgard scoffs. "Dorothea? I can't imagine her and Hubert serenading one another."

"Hubert actually has a lovely voice," Byleth mentions, watching carefully as her hands move again and again. Edelgard smiles, listening to the sound… and… in her mind, it sounds like the color of sunrise, just as it did when she first looked out at the sky on the dawn of the first day of a Fodlan with no war. Edelgard straightens her spine, sets her hands on the keys with all of the elegance in the world as her stark red fingers paint the white for mere seconds of time. Her fingers press down and Byleth stutters over her own part, nearly in awe as Edelgard plays on so flawlessly, as if she had played this song a thousand times. Edelgard peeks at her from the corner of her eye and points at the keys with her nose, smiling at her gently. Keep going, she says with her eyes. Of course, Byleth agrees, playing and matching right back up with the emperor. Still… Edelgard doesn't sing. "El? You… have lyrics too, right?" Edelgard's face goes red, but she doesn't stop her hands.

"Right. Just… don't make fun of me. I made this when I was eighteen and… incredibly desperate for you." Byleth grins, giving Edelgard space by just looking away for now.

…..

….

Ahem, Edelgard clears her throat loudly, voice quivering on the first word before sucking it back in. Then she starts again.

"Reach for my hand," she says, more than sings, clearly trying to save herself from embarrassment. "I'll soar away. Oh, I wish I could stay," she says, right on the cusp of truly singing. Her fingers pick up their speed, and so do Byleth's. "Here in cherished halls~, in peaceful days~, I fear the edge of dawn~, knowing time betrays~." Then Edelgard's fingers go absolutely wild, with no hesitation, cutting the piano through the heart as she manipulates its beating by her own will. Byleth stops playing altogether, absolutely enthralled as Edelgard opens her mouth again. She sings and sings, passionate with every word with her face painted red, and just as Byleth thinks she'll pick up again, her playing slows, yet her voice becomes more and more desperate as she sings,

"As the rain falls on the path

I chase your shadow

I don't feel a single drop,

Or the ground below

Then you turn to me and I

Stop before I know

And the lie upon my lips,

I let it go…."

Byleth knows it's about her. It's always been about her. So much of what Edelgard did, she did for Byleth. How can anyone feel more loved?

"The blue moonlight

Cuts across our sight

As pure and clear as a ringing bell

Reaching for us in the night

As the wind calms my thoughts,

I held strong on this terrace

I feel at peace,

Carried away by the wind's song~!"

And Byleth knows exactly what she means. She can feel it throughout the entirety of her body.

"Open the door

And walk away

Never give in

To the call of yesterday~

Memories that made

Those days sublime

These ruined halls entomb

Stolen time~!"

Her fingers slam back down on the piano keys, and she lets them carry the song until the end, ebbing and flowing and taking all of the dampness out of Byleth's tongue. She finishes with a melody that's more uplifting than any before, and as soon as her thumb presses down on the final key, Edelgard releases her breath, just to choke it out when Byleth scoops her up in the tightest bone crushing hug ever known to man.

"Ah! Byleth. I swear you're killing me!"

"Then kill me back." Edelgard pouts for a second, being smothered against Byleth's jacket before easing into it slowly. "Your song was beautiful. I've never felt so much emotion from a song. And," Byleth pulls back just enough to look into Edelgard's eyes. "I really appreciate how-er-The way you sang about me. I never knew I could impact som-you so much. I-um. It meant a lot… to know that." Byleth embarrassedly huffs out a laugh at the mush that just fell out of her mouth.

"I love you," Edelgard breathes. Byleth looks at her again, seeing not the slightest grin because of foolish words, only the frown of someone who's bottling in a cry stemmed from unadulterated affection. "I love you so much," she whispers, her lilac eyes filling up with sudden wetness. "As silly as it sounds, I think I always have." She laughs at herself after, dismissing it entirely as she bats her lids. Byleth quickly takes those gloved hands in hers, wanting those tears to fall just so she can wipe them for Edelgard.

"I loved you as soon as I saw you, El. I just didn't get it then." Edelgard sniffs, nodding as she smiles in understanding. Byleth holds her wife's jaw, caressing it with her thumb as she takes time to just appreciate the softness, the structure, the beauty of Edelgard's sleek face with all of its tiredness and its tears. It's all Edelgard. It's everything Byleth loves. "Argh, I love you so much." She leans in to kiss the emperor, desperately sucking on her bottom lip.

"Mmm. Only you make me feel this good," Edelgard says against Byleth's partly opened mouth. Something in Byelth switches, and she suggestively grips at Edelgard's hips, pulling her impossibly closer before suggesting that,

"I can make you feel even better." They both pause. "...If you want to," she mumbles afterward, blinking hard as she reminds herself not to push anything on he-

"Right here," Edelgard states abruptly. Byleth blinks again. "Here. Right now. Go lock the door. I'll close some of the drapes."

"Uh. R-really?" Edelgard laughs at her this time, and now it's Byleth who's pouting.

"I'm trying to be fun," Edelgard sighs, half-chuckling still. "Maybe this is exactly what we needed." Byleth doesn't argue this time, and-yeah… when she got up… well. So much is happening between her legs. Moments later they come back together near the piano, both of them not feeling nearly as awkward as they expected (nor as they usually do when they try planning for sex). They kiss once, twice, then one more time before Byleth unsnaps Edelgard's cape off of her back and throws it over her own shoulder. "What are you doing?" Edelgard asks.

"Can you close the lid?" She points to the piano, and Edelgard does as told. Soon Byleth tosses the cape out flat across the grand piano, hiding its pure white with crimson instead. She grins at Edelgard before pressing a kiss to her nose and lifting her onto the edge of the top.

"...I see. Well this is quite handy then. Good thinking, yes." There's just the slight buzzing of something or another outside, with very little light getting in, just how Edelgard prefers it. This may not be the most "passionate" way of going about it, but Byleth crouches down to pull Edelgard's boots off and ease her tights down. Edelgard gets to undoing her horns, it always takes a bit of time, but neither of them mind, this isn't at all about being quick anyway. When Byleth comes back up, kicking her own boots off to the side, she wraps her arms around Edelgard's back, playing with the seam near the top.

"You want to leave this on?" No judgment in her voice.

"Take it off." No hesitation.

"Are you sure?" Byleth doublechecks. Edelgard just nods, already pulling her gloves off with her teeth. Nnn. That's… hot, Byleth thinks. Anyhow, the empress first unbuttons the choker around Edelgard's neck, pushing it down her shoulders. She takes time to kiss the skin there, starting at the emperor's earlobe, against her jaw, down her neck, and then all the way to the end of her shoulder. With every little kiss, Edelgard lets out soft breaths of relief, untensing every muscle in her body until all she can do is hold onto Byleth. In the meantime, Byleth unzips Edelgard's top all the way down to her skirt that's a separate piece. Yet Byleth can't remove the top since Edelgard is purposefully holding her too tight to be able to move. They don't say anything, they just wait. A little more. Then a little more.

Edelgard lets go. Byleth pulls the dress down her wife's arms and takes in the sight before her. Absolutely perfect. She doesn't speak, she just leans down and presses a kiss over Edelgard's heart. She hears a whimper from above her. Sure, the skin is hard, scarred, jagged even, but what does it matter compared to being blessed with the privilege of Edelgard letting her in like this. After pressing one more kiss there, she tosses Edelgard's top onto the piano bench and quickly unbuttons her own top, so they can at least be bare for each other. Like a moth to flame, Edelgard's hands go for her breasts, and this time, Byleth can finally do the same.

"Hnn." Their heads fall forward, knocking their forehead together as they tease each other's nipples. "Byleth that feels…."

"Good?"

"Yeah," Edelgard breathes, her eyes fluttering closed. Byleth feels it too, the goosebumps going up her back, the excitement in her stomach, and that drumming of her heart and groin. Experimentally, Byleth tugs just a little harder on both buds at the same time, and Edelgard keens, shakily saying the empress's name again. With such encouragement, Byleth may as well be able to touch the sky, right? She grins as she pulls Edelgard against her and lifts with one arm, peeling the skirt off of the emperor's wide hips with one frisky hand. When Edelgard is finally, finally naked, Byleth doesn't spend time staring. Even though she desperately wants to. She knows that if she stares, Edelgard will shy away, and Byleth honestly can't stomach the thought this time. Ducking down to kiss Edelgard's thigh before coming right back up, she threads her fingers through the hair at the base of her wife's skull and takes her lips with vigour. The little noises between the two of them, from the hums to the wetness of their lips, all play its own harmony that Byleth could listen to all day. But I have something better waiting.

"Lay back," Byleth softly orders. Her hands won't stop moving all over Edelgard's skin, greedily feeling all she can. When Edelgard back, holding herself on her elbows, she looks at Byleth rather worriedly.

"You aren't coming with me?" Byleth shakes her head no.

"Just tell me if I should stop." And she bends over, adjusting the emperor's thighs over her sturdy shoulders. Edelgard's mind goes blank as she watches Byleth get closer and closer to her vagi-

"Wait!" Byleth pulls back, worriedly blinking up at Edelgard whose eyes are big and round. "I-I don't, I-I-" Quickly does Byleth let her thighs down, stepping between them instead as she pulls Edelgard back up.

"It's ok. It's ok, El." Cautiously does Byleth rub up and down her wife's sides, making sure not to touch anything else. It hurts her seeing Edelgard trembling like this, but she doesn't say anything unnecessary, just repeats her last words once more.

"I must overcome this," Edelgard declares, still shaking in Byleth's arms. "Try again. The same thing." Edelgard lays back on her own this time, locking Byleth between her thighs. The empress tales one big breath, putting her hands on Edelgard's hips before diving in with a long tentative lick. "Shit."

"Bad?"

"Hah. Quite the-mm-opposite." Edelgard puts her hand on the top of Byleth's head, rubbing inconsistently. It's never felt this good before, nor has it been this easy for her body to give in to Byleth's demands. Edelgard's head is up in the clouds, thinking only of the pleasure Byleth is giving her, especially when she nips gently at Edelgard's swollen clitoris. "Unghh." Byleth's eyes squeeze shut, groaning out as she licks deeper, feeling the heat radiating off of Edelgard. Not wanting to ruin a good thing, Byleth keeps up with what she doing, but I don't really know the sign that El's gonna finish. I can't really say words right now…. Hm. She figures she may as well just happen upon it when the time comes. Edelgard is jerking up pretty hard already, so Byleth takes the plunge. Slowly, and very very cautiously, she drags her finger over the tight opening she's only gotten into once (and that did not end well). Edelgard bucks for a second, clearly about to move away before slowly sinking back down onto the piano lid.

Easy, Byleth says to herself, playing with the hole a little as she ever-so-slightly pushes a fingertip in. Her eyes widen as she feels Edelgard actually loosen up for a second. That just spurs the empress on even more. Edelgard tightens her thighs around Byleth's head, forcing her in as she grinds up into that perfect mouth of hers. Edelgard moans so loudly when Byleth bites down on her again that her ears pop, and she embarrassedly covers her mouth right afterward. She glances down at Byleth whose eyes are completely glazed over in awe as she licks and licks. That has to be hurting her jaw, Edelgard thinks, wanting to ask but not being able to get a single word out. And then that wandering finger of Byleth's pushes in a little more, and Edelgard's jaw clenches in anticipation just for Byelth to pull out again.

"My love," she rasps. "Please. I'm ready this time." Byleth's foams at the mouth.

"I love you," Byleth whines before pressing the entirety of her finger into Edelgard. The way Edelgard's back arches up off the surface is a sight Byelth will never have erased from her memories. But… trying to give head while moving her finger is… hard, especially being bent over. Byleth hums, and Edelgard yelps at the sensation. Hot. But I need to figure out how to even do this. Byleth moves in and out, in and out, then flips her hand over, but that hurts too. Still, there's not really a way for her to get into a vetted position, so she's just going to work with this. There's plenty to be distracted by anyhow; for one, Edelgard is so tight around her finger. Her velvety insides are contracting around her finger every other second, and this thin clear liquid keeps spilling out between the hole and her finger. Carefully she presses a second finger up against the other, trying to push in.

"Htt-" Byleth stops. "J-just keep trying," Edelgard says, mouth still pressed to the back of one shaky hand. Obeying, Byleth tries pushing in, biting her lip as Edelgard's voice quivers. It's about as easy as pressing your fingers into a tightly bound ball of rubber bands, but she's trying. When she finally gets past her second nail bed, Edelgard groans and grabs at her cape, tugging roughly.

"We don't have to do two, El. Just one is an achievement."

"I… know. Try moving... again." Byleth smiles purely out of victory for her wife and pushes in further, this time at her first knuckle. "It feels so… oddly comforting. But it-it hurts a little still."

"Should I stop?"

"Don't," Edelgard pleads, getting up on her elbows to look down. The sight before her, her legs spread with Byleth so intimately close to her as she litters kisses on her white scared thighs and presses even deeper in is just… I can't describe it. Her entire body is yearning for more anyhow. She puts a hand on Byleth's head and urges her closer, wanting her to kiss her there again. Byleth smiles at her sweetly, whispering,

"Good job El. You did it," before getting back to work. Her excitement proves to be a bit too much however when she starts fucking her too roughly with those fingers.

"Oof! Slower, please, my love. Just for now."

"Nn." She slows it down, carefully pulling out and then pushing in a bit faster. Together they build to a rhythm, and Edelgard's hips actively seek out Byleth's tongue to get that extra bit of friction she wants so badly. And there's that coiling low in her waist that makes Edelagrd feel like her body is about to burst into flames. It's starting to hurt more, and she can feel the stretch of skin down there, but it feels… good. She's satisfied knowing it's Byleth's fingers in her, that it's Byleth who's giving her this pleasure, and so any shooting pain just transitions into one of need.

"Ungh! Byleth! Do that again." Byleth's gotten the hang of pressing the tips of her fingers up into this harder muscle deep inside of Edelgard, and everytime she does so, Edelgard gasps out her approval.

"You're so hot," Byleth half-laughs. "How are you so hot?" Edelgard, light-headed as she is, laughs as well.

"I co-hah. Ask the same of you."

"You taste so good," Byleth adds, licking and pumping faster, driving the emperor up the piano with her strength. "Don't end this yet, El. Keep going for me." Edelgard's face feels a hundred degrees hotter at that, and she covers her eyes with her wrist, wanting to only be here, with Byleth, not in the palace, not even in this world. Her bare breasts feel so good against the air, but they feel even better when Byleth reaches up and pinches at one.

"Fuck Byleth." As soon as she says it she has a need to apologize.

"Heh. Let your tongue go, baby. I'm the only one here. I want to hear everything that comes out of you." Mmmmf that voice, Edelgard thinks to herself, whining as she bucks up again. And those fingers! How is she so good at this?! Just as she thinks that, Byleth moves the slightest bit faster, and Edelgard's jaw falls open into the loudest, longest moan yet. Both of them feel their insides drop at that, and Byleth groans out into the air.

Nff! Sqksqksqksqk!

Edelgard squeezes that cloak bunched up under her, tighter and tighter and tighter as the pace picks up quicker and better and perfect and don't you dare stop! Byleth's finally worked her open enough to get all the way to the knuckle of her fist, jamming those fingers into her with force strong enough to wrack her bones.

"Hah! Definitely… going to… finish," Edelgard pants. Is that smoke she smells? Whatever. It's fine. Byleth isn't commenting either. "There there there there!"

She finishes with a strangled cry, and a gush of arousal floods Byleth's tongue in tandem that's strong enough to sate every craving she's ever had. All of those muscles inside of Edelgard pulse and scream and just exhaust themselves to give Edelgard a perfect orgasm at long last.

….

….

BRKT! DFDFDFDF!

Edelgard's eyes pop open and Byleth is hunched over her legs frantically patting away the flames that are covering Edelgard's cape. Edelgard lets out a sharp laugh, completely useless at helping as her eyes tear up with elation and just pure joy. It takes Byleth a good minute to get rid of the flames, and now they're both curled up on the piano lid laughing into their fists.

"How will I ever tell you just how much I fall in love with you more and more each day?" Then they both quiet down, still smiling from ear to ear. The emperor meant to say that to herself, but… she let it slip. She finally spoke her mind. She's capable of expressing herself after all (and in more ways than one). Byleth gives her the softest, sweetest look she's ever seen in her life, and her heart throbs.

"I love you like nothing else Edelgard."

They hug for far too long after that.