"She is fragile like a dead flower
Her petals fall by the hour
She is three or four
She sees no sky to soar"
~Jessica Semaan

"Sora," my sister's voice was brittle and hard to hear as she struggled to find the energy to speak, "This isn't your fault. You are my sister. Some stupid test doesn't determine that."

"That stupid test could've allowed me to save your life, Kanna-onee-chan! If I was your real sister, I could have been a match! But instead, I have to sit here and watch you struggle and hope that another match will show up soon," I snapped through angry, hot tears as my heterochromatic eyes met her amber ones. I had always wished that I could have the beautiful amber ones that my mom and sister had. They had blamed it on genetics, but now I knew what they meant in full.

"Sora," her tired voice sounded angry as she broke into a fit of coughs. Unable to watch her struggle without doing something, I quickly brought her a bottle of water from the mini-fridge in her hospital room as well as a wet washcloth to clean up the inevitable mess I knew would be in her hand following her coughing fit.

Sure enough, when I reached my sister, though her coughing fit has subsided, her hand was covered scarlet from the blood she had coughed up. Gently taking the wet cloth, I wiped off her hand and passed her the now open bottle of water. With a nod of thanks, she took a couple of sips before placing it on the bedside table with a shaky hand.

"Sora," she tried again, her glare weaker than before and largely undermined by the bags under her eyes, "My death will not be your fault."

"You're not going to die," I insisted. She gave me a weak, bittersweet smile, but there was no grief in her eyes. She was at peace with what was to come.

"I am. And soon. But I'm glad I got to watch you perform at least once on your college stage before I do," Kanna said before reaching out her arms for a hug, which I gladly took, "I'll always be proud of you, my little star. I can't wait to see how bright you shine." As tears filled my eyes once again, I couldn't help but think to myself that there's no way I could ever shine as bright as her.

Unfortunately, the brightest stars often burn out the fastest, and just like the bright stars in the sky that burn out far too quickly, Kanna did the same that very night. By the time I woke up, her light had burnt out, but despite that, her body still had a calm and at peace smile.

That day, a song began in my heart, way too soft as though it were trying to not be heard, and if I was honest, I had no interest in hearing any song or seeing any light. My sister, my guiding light, had moved on to live among the stars, leaving me behind to navigate a world that I wasn't so sure of anymore.

The following days were filled with words of condolences from people I didn't know, and I was pretty sure Kanna hadn't known either. My parents wanted me to sit with them, but I refused. Thanks to their lies, I had had a false hope that I could help my sister. I was tired of the pain, tired of the lies, and tired of being close to people. The Sorashi that all of them had known had died with Kanna. The light in my one blue and one gray eye were gone, leaving them looking dull. My long straight black hair was brushed enough to look presentable, but if anyone looked at me, I looked much more like a corpse than my sister did.

At the end of all of this, the only thing left was for me to return to my college dorm and the only true comfort I would allow myself to have in this world: my piano.

The night of Kanna's funeral, I went straight back to the music room at Sendai college and allowed all the hurt and tears that I had been unable to shed at the funeral come out as I played my heart out a million different ways through the melodies I had learned for years. I played all of our favorites, but none of them fit what I wanted to say to Kanna. Unable to cry any more tears, I returned to my dorm room, my eyes subconsciously lifting to see the myriad of lights the sky held, but that night, my eyes didn't focus on the stars.

Instead, I found myself looking at the moon. I smiled bitterly as I thought about how it too would lose its ability to shine once the sun was longer there.

"When the sun no longer shines, will you be as lonely as me?" I thought out loud as just a couple of more tears fell down my face. I received no answer. The full moon continued to shine way too damn brightly. Meanwhile, I was left, duller than ever, as though my light had lost the will to shine.

-

Song: Saturn by Sleeping At Last