wow, i appreciate all the reviews and follows this fic got! i hope you enjoy this!

Rick Grimes was a loud person. He was boisterous, and could get a party started just with his voice. He now curses his loudness, because apparently the gene rubbed off on Carl.

His cries could more than likely be heard by the neighbors, which he was embarrassed about. His son had kept him up all night, and probably the Williams' that lived right next door. He'd been crying pretty much all night, and almost all day. One would think Carl would want a break from yelling, but apparently not.

The reason he was crying so much? Rick wasn't 100% sure. But he's 73% sure it has to do with Carl's favorite blankie that he'd managed to lose.

"It's okay, Carl. Sssshhh." He bounces up and down softly as he walks around the living room, trying to calm his child down, but it's not working. He throws another couch pillow onto the ground with his free hand, to see if the small blanket is hiding under there.

It's not.

As if he's figured that out, Carl's cries get louder. He wasn't sure that was possible, but Rick's eardrums are traumatized from the screaming.

After Carl threw up on his shirt, he was forced to take it off, which now resulted in his skin being soaked with tears and snot. He would be disgusted, but right now the only thing he was worried about was getting the fucking blankie.

"Okay, why don't we try something else?" He walks to his play area, and picks up a different blanket. "This one is nice! This one Michonne brought, and-" Carl drops it on the ground, and Rick huffs.

This wouldn't be happening if Lori was here. She would've found the stupid grey bunny blankie, and Carl would be happy, thus making Rick happy.

If Lori were there, he would've at least gotten a good 4 hours of sleep, and he could probably eat something that wasn't instant ramen. She could breastfeed, and he wouldn't be left stressing about whether the milk was too hot or not.

But she's not, because she took off, and left him alone in a big house they were supposed to be moving in together. She left him struggling to take care of a newborn, knowing he didn't have a clue on what to do. He'd never read the baby books she pushed on him, despite the amount of times she threw them at his head. He told her he'd learn through experience.

That obviously didn't work out, and now the small amount of free time he did get, it was spent reading on bonding and soothing, and how he should figure out Carl's sleeping schedule.

They had a plan. Or at least, he did. To raise Carl together, and give him a loving happy environment. But apparently Lori had a different idea.

The sudden quietness in the room brings Rick back to the present, and he looks at Carl to see him whimpering. His bottom lip juts out, and he's frowning at him with teary eyes.

"Carl, I don't know what to do."

He doesn't, and tears start welling in his own eyes as he looks at his son. This isn't the way things should be happening. He should have two parents that would help him navigate through the world, instead of just the one that didn't have a clue of what he was doing.

He hears Carl's voice start to hum, and he mutters a silent 'fuck' before the yelling starts again.

It's back to looking for the blankie again, and tears start falling down his face.

He's not supposed to be doing this alone. He doesn't know what the fuck he's doing, and now he's soley responsible for a tiny human. Carl doesn't have a mother, and Rick doesn't have a partner to help him through anything that's going on. She was the one that knew everything about taking care of a child. She was the one that was supposed to help him.

She's gone, and now he's standing in (what was supposed to be) their house, crying with Carl over a bunny blankie.

The doorbell suddenly rings, and Rick rolls his teary eyes. Now isn't the best time for someone to be coming over, but he walks to the door anyway. He's prepared to yell at the person 'get away', until he opens the door and sees who it is.

Michonne stands there, another dish in her hands, and the smile on her face immediately falls. The sight of a crying Rick and Carl is probably the last thing she was expecting, and she immediately makes her way into his house, kicking her shoes off at the door.

"What's wrong, Rick?" Her voice is laced with concern and worry, and it makes Rick's tears fall quicker. His mind is screaming at him to get a grip so he doesn't look like a complete fool, but he's too overwhelmed with emotion.

She sets her dish on the coffee table, and immediately walks back to the crying Grimes'. She takes Carl out of his arms, and Rick uses the opportunity to wipe the tears on his face with his hands.

Michonne bounces the same way Rick was just before he came in, but it doesn't make his son's cries lessen.

"Rick tell me what's wrong."

He sniffs, and he thinks he looks pathetic as hell, but her voice is comforting.

"Carl lost his blankie." He sounds so stupid. "We can't find it even though we looked through the whole house, and-"

"We can handle that-"

"-it's gone and it's never coming back. And now Carl is sad and I'm sad because the fucking blankie is gone."

He chokes on his words at the end, and he looks at Michonne.

"Rick-"

"It's the only blankie he likes. There are no other blankies. And I don't even know if he's crying over the blankie but it always makes him stop crying when he's sad, y'know?"

He sniffs, and wipes the falling tears with his hands, given he doesn't have a shirt. The fact that he doesn't even have a shirt on somehow embarrasses him even more.

"I can find the blankie Rick, but you need to calm down."

"I'm calm." He crosses his arms.

"Did you sleep today?" He took a 30 minute cat nap while Carl was sleeping, but he woke up when he heard his cries through the baby monitor.

"I took a nap."

"Okay, this is what we're going to do." She shifts Carl, who's still wailing, to her other hip, and continues to bounce. "You're going to sleep, and I'll handle Carl."

"But-"

"We'll find the blankie. You're exhausted, and you're not going to help us."

"Michonne, I'm fine. Honest, I took a nap-"

"I'm being authoritative." He realizes she's serious, and she furrows her eyebrows in an attempt at being 'authoritative'. "Take a nap. That's my order. Okay?"

He doesn't want to. He would much rather help, and do something useful, to bandage his wounded pride. But instead he nods, and makes his way up the stairs.

And when he lays in his bed, his mind tunes out Carl's cries, and the yelling in his head. Instead, he goes into a deep sleep.


When he wakes up, he immediately looks at the baby monitor, and is relieved to see Carl sleeping in his crib, bunny blankie in hand. He looks at the clock next to the monitor, and it reads 2:07 AM, which means he'd slept 10 hours.

Rick gets out of bed with a groan, and makes his way downstairs. He's expecting to see a handwritten note from Michonne, which is why it shocks him to see her sleeping on his couch.

He makes his way over to her, and sits on the ground in front of her.

Her hair is in her face, and he tucks the strands behind her ear. Behind the curtain of hair shows her parted lips.. She looks peaceful. So peaceful, that he almost doesn't want to wake her up. But he does, by gently shaking her shoulder. She moans, which makes him blush, and her eyes flutter open in confusion.

"Good morning. Or, good night I should say." He smiles, and she sleepily blinks.

"Did Carl wake you?"

"No, um…I woke up myself." She nods. "I want to thank you. For what you did today. Y'know, like finding the blankie and everything. And for letting me sleep."

She nods and sits up, but Rick doesn't move from his position on the floor.

"How was your rest?" Her voice is laced in sleep, but he doesn't mind. It's still comforting to him.

"It was really good. I haven't slept like that in forever." He actually really needed the rest, and the time alone without Carl, so he's genuinely grateful to her.

"I'm glad." She smiles at him, and he sheepishly grins. Having her attention directed towards him always made him nervous, and he scratches the back of his head. "Do you want to tell me why you were crying now?"

"What?" The question catches him off guard.

"I know you weren't crying about the blankie Rick." He wonders if it was that obvious, or if she just knew him too well.

"It's nothing. I'll be fine."

She frowns. "You know you can talk to me about anything." She places a hand on his bended knee, and the touch makes him relax. "I'm here for you."

His eyes widen. Hearing those words from her makes his stomach flip, which he's slightly annoyed about. He was sure he'd buried the feelings he had for her a long time ago, but being around her makes it difficult for him.

"It's really nothing." He would smile, but he doesn't feel like forcing it.

"Tell me what nothing is." She's being persistent, and he has a feeling that she's not going to leave his house until she gets an answer from him.

"I'm just worried. That's it." He scratches his hair, and looks at the ground.

"What are you worried about?" He knows it's easy to talk to Michonne, he'd ranted to her on more than one occasion during their youth, but now he curses her ability to get him to talk.

"I um…I'm just worried about Carl. That's it." His gaze is still on the ground, and it doesn't move when he feels her legs brush against his arm. She's sitting next to him now.

"There's nothing to be worried about. He's healthy, and happy-"

"No he's not." He doesn't mean to say it out loud, but it slips out anyway.

"What do you mean?" She had an ability to get him to talk, and he hates it right now.

"He's not happy with me."

"Why wouldn't he be happy with you?" She knows how to say the right things. He shouldn't be surprised; she could breathe and he'd be at her beck and call. He was always like this. They were always like this.

"Um…he cries all the time. And I thought it was just a normal baby thing, but he cries more than most babies do." He knows, because he looked up on it. "And um…I realized it's probably because he misses…he misses his mom." He doesn't want to say her name out loud.

"And I tried to do everything to get him to love me. Like all the bonding and soothing tricks I read up on. But it's not working." Tears start welling up in his eyes, and he groans. He can't even talk without getting emotional.

"Keep going. I'm listening."

"Um…y'know, it's just…I think he wants something that I can't give him. He wants his mom, and I can't be that for him." His voice cracks, and he groans again, because he's fucking crying and he doesn't have a grip on his emotions. "I can't…I can't be his mom and his dad, y'know?"

"It's not your job to be."

"Yes it is. Because I'm the only person he has." He wipes his tears away, and continues. "He doesn't have anyone else because she left him, and now I'm stuck not knowing what to do."

"Rick." She places a hand on his arm, and he hesitantly looks at her. "Carl has a lot of people in his life that care about him. He has me, and Glenn and Maggie, and his grandparents, and-"

"He doesn't have a mother though." The room grows silent, as she thinks of what to say.

"You know my mother died when I was young. I don't remember her." He looks at her. "I turned out alright, didn't I?" She turned out perfect, but he wouldn't say that out loud. "I know the situation is different, but it'll end up being okay. Because he has you."

"I'm an awful dad." He's wallowing in self pity now, but he finds that it's kind of nice to talk to someone about everything that's been plaguing his mind.

"Rick no you're not. It's only been two months." She rubs his arm.

"I don't even know what I'm doing. And he can probably tell."

"You love him. And you're trying your best. That's all you can really do, right?"

He nods, and her hand cups his cheek. He turns to look at her.

"You're doing everything you can to give Carl the life you know he deserves. I know it's hard, and you probably feel like you're doing it alone, but you have so many people that are here to help." They hold eye contact, and he's not strong enough to look away.

"Carl doesn't hate you. He's a baby, he doesn't even know what that word means." He gives a weak smile at her attempt at a joke. "The only thing you can do is try your best. Right?"

"Yeah."

"Okay then." She smiles. "So let's do everything in our power to take care of Carl."

She's trying so hard to give an encouraging speech. He was the one that was better at speeches than she was, but the fact that she's trying makes his heart tug. And oddly, her small speech makes him feel better. A lot better.

"Thank you." Her hand moves from his cheek to his bare shoulder, and she squeezes the muscle.

"I'm here for you. Always." He nods, and she crosses her legs.

"So is there anything you want to tell me?" She looks at him. "Y'know, since I just finished pouring my heart and soul to you."

She smiles. "Maybe another day." He nods, and she struggles to stand up, but she eventually does. "I should be heading home."

"Oh! Right." He stands up next to her.

"Carl fell asleep a couple of hours ago, so you should have some time to relax."

He's happy at that fact. He'll definitely squeeze in a shower before he wakes up, given it's been a couple of days.

"I really appreciate you, Michonne." She blushes, and he smiles.

"It's no problem. I'll come back as soon as I can to check up on you."

"You don't have to-"

"I insist." She walks towards the door, and he follows her.

"By the way, where did you find the blankie?"

Michonne laughs before answering. "It was in the refrigerator."

His face crinkles in confusion, until he remembers what happened. He'd read somewhere that babies liked warm blankies, so he'd tried heating it up. Long story short, he overheated it, and decided to put it in the fridge.

"I'm so stupid."

"No you're not." He certainly feels like he is. "I'll see you soon."

She squeezes his arm, before walking out the door, leaving him again. He doesn't mind the fact that he's alone now, because she gave him time to relax, without having to think about Carl.

He spends that time finally showering, and eating the home cooked mac and cheese she left in the fridge, with a note that said 'it's better than the microwaveable kind!'.

He spends that time thinking of her.

A part of Rick was still surprised at the fact that she was helping him out so much. He shouldn't be shocked though, she was always there for him. When they were kids, she let him copy off her schoolwork. And when they were teens, she tutored him (because there were only so many times one could cheat without getting caught). And now as adults, she was helping him with Carl.

She was always there for him, and no matter how many times he thought she would leave his side, she never did. He made a promise to himself that he would never take her kindness for granted.

But he was always there for her too. When she got bullied, he was the one that would defend her (even though he always ended up getting beat up). And he was the one that encouraged her when she told him she was feeling down, and felt like giving up.

Rick and Michonne would always be there for each other. And everyone around them knew it. He was also fairly certain everyone knew they both had feelings for each other too.

For as long as he could remember, Rick was in love with Michonne Jesekai. He loved her as a child, when he was a loud energetic kid, and she was a socially anxious loner. He loved her when they were teens, when he was still loud and energetic, and she was still a popular quiet loner. He always loved her.

And as one does when they're in love with someone, he confessed.

It wasn't really a confession, it was more of him telling him he loved her in the heat of the moment. I love you could mean a lot of different things. It could mean he was in love with her, or it could mean he loved her as a friend. She assumed he meant the latter, because all she said was I love you too and walked away.

Even if she did love him back, it could never work out in high school. And they both knew that fact. Mainly because of the fact that her dad hated him, but also because he would be going to college miles away from Konoha, and she would stay home.

And sometimes he wondered if now that they were older, they could get together. But he was married, and she was engaged to the asshole. There was always something in the way of them getting together.

And he wondered if maybe it simply wasn't meant to be.

Carl moving in the sleep monitor distracts him from his thoughts, and he makes his way back to the nursery.

His break is over, and it's back to another day as a father.

"Alright Carl, let's go."


so, i hope you enjoyed this, and i hope it gave you a feel of their characters in this! michonne is more reserved, while rick is loud and energetic. again, i have five chapters already ready, I just need to change the names and post! :) have a good day or night and be safe!