The Amazon Jungle Friday, June 2nd 2017
Previously on Cartoon Crossover Survivor!
~Spencer rants about losing. He continues to express his anathema toward the Savage Tribe. Lola Bunny is frustrated. She has done everything in her power to connect with her tribemates while also contributing in challenges and around camp life~
The Paradigm Tribe seemed at a tipping point. Having lost three challenges in a row they suddenly found themselves tied, number wise, with a tribe they once dominated. Nothing was going right. Even the zen filled leader of the tribe, Angel Whis had trouble finding a silver lining.
~An interesting juxtaposition…we are shown the jovial Savage Tribe. They joke around, revel in their win streak. Life in the Amazon doesn't seem so bad~
The Savage Tribe seemed empowered by their success. A new energy permeated within…their attitudes had reached all-time highs. Even Daniel Keem, a man known to get on a monks last nerve was engaging in jocular behavior with his tribe mates.
~We see Whis emerge from his hut. Several minutes later Lola sneaks out of the very same hut, trying to keep her emergence a secret. She hurries to catch up with Angel, we guess, down by the Amazonian river~
Recent behavior suggested that a potential power couple was in the works between Angel Whis and Lola Bunny. They appeared to do everything within their power…aside from staying away from one another…to conceal their interactions. Both obviously aware of the type of target that's placed on a couple's back.
~Sam Manson, missing for a few days, emerges from the jungle. She appears annoyed that nobody noticed her absence~
A slight disruption on the Savage Tribe when Sam Manson, who had apparently been missing for a few days, re-emerges to the shock and relief of nobody. Her absence more of an afterthought amongst the rest of the tribe did not sit well with her.
~The Paradigm Tribe is shown preparing for the challenge. Spencer is lit up. He's focused…the last thing he wants is to see another Savage victory. At the challenge's conclusion, however, the Paradigm Tribe would taste its fourth consecutive defeat~
Despite their best efforts, the Paradigm Tribe succumbed to the momentum garnered by the Savage Tribe. Their loss at the Immunity Challenge ensured that they would, for the first time all game, be at a numbers disadvantage.
~The Savage Tribe parties…they look for Abu...a missing monkey is their only concern. Meanwhile, The Paradigm Tribe is shown going over their most recent defeat. Spencer is furious, as always~
With Spencer about the crack, The Paradigm Tribe appeared lost and confused. One of their leaders, Phillip DeFranco wondered aloud about ratings – for some reason. Leafy took the loss personally…Lola hoped for change. They traveled to Tribal Council with a lot on their minds
~Another GRILLING by Chris is shown. And, by grilling, we of course mean slow pitched softballs. It seems to come down to Leafy and Lola Bunny. The votes are cast…Chris reveals the names and Lola Bunny is sent home~
Lola's efforts weren't enough. After all the work she put into the game, she was dealt a pre-merge elimination. One challenge, one more vote remains before the merge. Who will win? Can the Paradigm Tribe even the numbers to five a piece? Will the Savage Tribe continue their dominant streak entering into the merge with a six to four advantage? Tune in tonight to find out on this week's episode of Cartoon Crossover Survivor!
~We cut to the intro~
PARADIGM TRIBE - DAY 24 - POST TRIBAL COUNCIL
~An exhausted Angel Whis walks out in front of the rest of the Paradigm tribe as they make their way back to camp. He appears calm as usual, but as they enter the campsite proper, he suddenly launches his torch like an Olympic javelin into the forest, landing it somewhere in the distance with a clang of wood and loud rustling of leaves. An animal of some sort is heard baying, likely having just been hit in the head with a wooden torch on what was otherwise a fine day~
~Whis turns toward his tribemates and glowers at each of them, perhaps looking for some explanation as to why they voted off someone he had developed a bond with over the course of the game, Lola Bunny. Or maybe that much was obvious, and he is simply looking for someone to confirm it. He takes a deep breath. The Perfect One sees. It had nothing to do with broken alliances or men vs. women or old vs. new. It had everything to do with one loudmouthed ignoramus on the Savage Tribe named Daniel Keem and eliminating anyone who was close to him~
Angel Whis: Keem caused this.
~Whis postulates to the tribe, an air of indignation narrowly breaking through his zen-like exterior~
Angel Whis: The Perfect One will not stop until I personally break Daniel's torch in two.
SAVAGE TRIBE - DAY 25
~The Savage Tribe seems peaceful, sanguine as always. Or, well since they started winning. Abu continues to be missing despite his immunity challenge contributions one day earlier. He's a capricious primate…here one day, gone the next! Killer Keemstar continues to develop a strange fascination with Prince's buddy and Sam's admirer~
Daniel Keem: Well here comes another cycle of preparation. If we don't find Abu before the merge then he may be lost forever. In other news I am sure I am going to be blamed by everyone over the elimination on that other tribe. That's fine with me. I am the King of Controversy for a reason and anyone who wants to come at me, bring it on because I am waiting for it. Let's see what your best shot is.
~A monkey cries from within the jungle. Daniel looks…he turns toward Ali. Ali rushes into the protective foliage in search for his beloved Abu. He runs past Frieza and Tennyson who are looking at the ground. It seems to be moving~
Frieza: Well, that's not good
Ben Tennyson: A surprise ant infestation!
~Frieza follows the giant line of ants. It ends at the base of the dead, decaying fish~
Ben Tennyson: Any theories?
Frieza: The fish?
Ben Tennyson: More fish?
Frieza: No, I said…
~Tennyson grabs his spear and heads for the river. Frieza lowers his head and whispers to himself~
Frieza: …the fish…
~Katz walks up getting a whiff of the decaying fish~
Katz: Smells like a cheap strip club
~Frieza sighs and heads over to the pile of fish…he sifts through them, removing the rotting carcasses. Katz dunks his head in "Hail, Sleet, Tornadoes, Snow, Jellybeans, California Sunshine, Purple Heart, Blaze, Speedballs, and Spaceballs"
PARADIGM TRIBE – DAY 25
~Leafy emerges from his hut. He doesn't seem to be his carefree, what-the-fuck-ever self. He finds Angel's torch and picks it up. He returns it to the exterior of Angel's hut. He takes a moment to look over the camp. It feels like it's disintegrating~
Calvin Veil: I'm glad I'm still around…
~It's obvious Leafy felt he was done. Lola's departure was a last minute reprieve. Whis steps out of his hut and spots the returned torch. He looks down at it and sighs. DeFranco steps into view noticing what's got his partner's attention~
Phillip DeFranco: Sorry Angel. I enjoyed having Lola around too. Perhaps a 10 air horn salute?
~DeFranco removes his air horn from…somewhere. He raises it into the air and fires off ten delayed horn blows in honor of the Lola Once finished, Spencer staggers into view looking like a man battling a hangover. Which is strange because he's been out of alcohol or weeks~
Richard Spencer: Hey... fellas... Your ears bothering you? Angel? Phillip? I have this suspicion someone is talking shit about us. Some... idiot.
~Spencer spots Angel and Phillip looking at the torch. He doesn't get it. He looks around confused. Leafy whispers into his ear. Richard's eyes focus with knowledge~
Richard Spencer: Oh, yea, right! Lola was a nice gal, I'm sorry, Angel. The 10 air horn salute was a nice touch.
~ Spencer kneels and bows his head in a prayer for Lola's remembrance~
SAVAGE TRIBE – DAY 27 – PRE IMMUNITY CHALLENGE
~Daniel is seen doing his best Montana Max impression. He's drawing some numbers in the sand, obviously thinking about the impending merge. Frieza is in the background dragging an old parachute behind him…it's carrying loads of rotting fish. Daniel looks at the numbers and smiles, knowing the numbers are in their advantage. Katz is once again dipping his nose into "Hail, Sleet, Tornadoes, Snow, Jellybeans, California Sunshine, Purple Heart, Blaze, Speedballs, and Spaceballs"
Daniel Keem: I can feel it. The merge is coming soon and if you thought I was an asshole before just wait until I have to see the likes of Angel, Richard and Phillip every day until "we" take them out one by one. They won't have any idea that this was the plan all along. I don't even care if Whis has a hidden immunity idol it won't save him.
~ Daniel just smirks at the thought of this master plan coming together~
~ It's been a long, quiet weekend as the Savage Tribe has put everything together over the last month. Now, the final stretch appears to be before them. Frieza returns without the parachute and sits on a nearby rock, contemplating the coming challenge. Katz is shivering and sweating with red eyes now as he lays next to the lake.~
Frieza: So we're expecting a merge any day now. Bringing the tribes together. It looked like it was all over for the Savage Tribe early on, but when we figured things out, we locked it down. Now, we've got a chance to go into the merge potentially 6-4, which would guarantee our domination. If everyone is on their A game one more time, control of Survivor will be in our grasp.
~Frieza climbs down off the rock, as he's not foolish enough to attempt anything stupid. That guy came and went already. Daniel overhears Frieza and responds~
Killer Keemstar: Very true it will be Frieza but we have one more challenge to win tonight. I have faith in our tribe after the string of wins we put together.
Ben Tennyson: Let's finish strong boys!.. And girl. Can I interest anyone in a last second snack? Still got a few fish... Better eat 'em while we can, I think we're running out in the water!
Daniel Keemstar: I am down for some protein before tonight's challenge.
~Tennyson drops a bunch of fresh, dead fish onto the shortened pile. Frieza looks over and sighs, lowering his head. Daniel grabs the freshest fish he can find. Katz is now shaking like an Earthquake hit him head on as he fondly touches a bag of white powder and pills~
Daniel Keem: I must say Tennyson has become a marvelous fisherman since being out here. Kudos to you.
~Tennyson nods and stands confidently with his hands atop his hips. A few fish come wiggling atop the sand…they stop at his feet and die~
PARADIGM TRIBE – DAY 27 – PRE IMMUNITY CHALLENGE
~DeFranco is wandering around the jungle. He's by himself. He doesn't seem himself. He starts talking TO himself~
Phillip DeFranco: Man I hope I don't suck in the challenge tonight... I've come down with a pesky cold out here in the Amazon.
~He continues walking, stumbling a bit. Is he drunk? Is he sick? Or, worse, is his young age finally catching up to him? He's covered in sweat…he's been walking for what looks like hours. He finally takes a seat against a log~
Phillip DeFranco: Ugh... I'm feeling miserable today. I must be allergic to losing.
~DeFranco leans his head back, his eyes grow heavy. He stares into the sky through his narrowed eye lids. He calls out to nobody in particular~
Phillip DeFranco: I know this may seem like a weird time to bring this up... but Angel, what do you think about another run in Cartoon Crossover?
~Phillip passes out for a while. He wakes up to voices. He gets to his feet and follows them~
Phillip DeFranco: Angel? Richard? Samurai Jack? Veil?
~He reaches a clearing…he sees figures, but they are blurred. He collapses to the ground~
IMMUNITY CHALLENGE
~The Paradigm Tribe is ready and waiting. They are missing someone. DeFranco is nowhere to be seen. Chris notices the absence of the most Marvelous man in the game~
Chris McLean: What happened to Phillip?
Richard Spencer: We don't have a fuckin clue. Guy went out into the woods and never came back. We tried looking for him but…well, I don't know. We had this challenge to win.
Chris McLean: Nothing like the team spirit! Well, I hate to tell you this but if he doesn't show up to the challenge he will be automatically eliminated from the game. The good news is, however, you guys wouldn't be forced to suffer another challenge loss!
Samurai Jack: Fuck you, Chris/
~The irascible Paradigm members loudly express their displeasure toward Chris. Whis tries calming them down…them being Richard and Samurai Jack, of course. Voices emerge to their right…they turn and see the Savage Tribe. Tennyson and Frieza are carrying DeFranco. They deposited DeFranco in front of his tribe mates. Tennyson wipes his hands~
Ben Tennyson: I think he called me honey.
~Angel's brow wrinkles. He kneels over and lightly taps Phillip in the face. He reaches back and gives him a good, hard slap. Phillip sits up, awakened. He looks at Angel~
Angel Whis: You okay?
Phillip DeFranco: Is this the challenge?
Angel Whis: Yep.
Phillip DeFranco: What happened?
Angel Whis: I'm guessing you got lost…became dehydrated and passed out near the Savage Tribe. In a very un-savage like act of compassion, they brought you here for the challenge.
Phillip DeFranco: Oh, okay. Well, let's kick their asses!
~Angel helps Phillip to his feet. Daniel's arms are folded…his head is shaking~
Daniel Keem: Aye! Just so you know, we didn't do it to be nice. We did it so we could enjoy kicking your asses one last time!
Chris McLean: Alright, well I'm glad you're all here. Unfortunately, you're going to have to head back to your camps.
~The tribes murmur…a few 'whats?' are heard~
Chris McLean: Yea, sorry, I forgot to bring tree mail. Anyway, take this box…each tribe gets one. Inside are the details pertaining to today's challenge!
Richard Spencer: This is some weak ass hosting.
Sam Manson: This is next-level bad.
Chris McLean: No comment. A plane will fly overhead in a few hours. The winning tribe will receive a crate filled with, umm, special things.
Prince Ali: *cough* Merge supplies *cough*
Chris McLean: Noooo comment. So, head back to your camps, read your challenge rules and watch for that plane!
~The disgruntled tribes head back to camp feeling like the past few hours have been wasted. They aren't wrong. The whole thing is fairly disorganized. CLASSIC Cartoon Crossover, BABY!~
SAVAGE TRIBE – IMMUNITY CHALLENGE
~Killer Keemstar and Sam Manson read the instructions~
Daniel Keem: Alright…we have to build a distress signal. The tribe with the best distress signals…as judged by the plane flying overhead wins.
Sam Manson: I could take my top off…
~The five males on Sam's tribe nod in appreciation. Abu suddenly leaps into view, having been miraculously found! Frieza shakes his head, snapping out of the image of a topless Sam~
Frieza: No, no, no…that's not very distressful.
Daniel Keem: Frieza's right. We need a fire or a giant SOS.
Katz: We could just spell Paradigm in the sand…they are pretty distressed right now.
~The rest of the Savage Tribe laughs at Katz's joke. Abu HOWLS with laughter before quietly suggesting they return to Sam's idea. We cut to the Paradigm Tribe~
PARADIGM TRIBE – IMMUNITY CHALLENGE
~The Paradigm Tribe is hard at work. Whis is building his vision. Leafy is using his craftsman skills to quickly construct a distressful structure. Samurai Jack, Spencer and DeFranco use their strength to move the process along as quickly as possible without compromising its integrity~
Angel Whis: This is going to be perfect.
Calvin Veil: Should I bring out the hot tub?
Angel Whis: In a minute.
Samurai Jack: This would be a lot easier if we had beer.
Richard Spencer: No shit, we'd better fucking win. I didn't come out here so I could move shit around without getting paid.
Phillip DeFranco: It'll be fine. We get to use our brains in this challenge…something the Savage Tribe lacks.
~Several minutes elapse. Whis nods at the logs positioned in the ground and turns to Leafy~
Angel Whis: Alright, bring out the Jacuzzi!
Phillip DeFranco: I'll go get the wild pig we caught.
~Whis removes a blade as we fade out~
SAVAGE TRIBE – IMMUNITY CHALLENGE
~Tennyson is leaning against a tree, shaking his head. Frieza and Ali arrange dead finish in an effort to spell HELP. Daniel and Katz climb trees, looking down to make sure everything is spelled properly~
Daniel Keem: Looks good from up here...
Katz: Yea, I can't see any issues from my spot. The 'P' is a little weird…looks almost like a flag, but I think they'll get the message...maybe it's my eyes, I have to quit the LSD.
~Tennyson stands and walks away~
Sam Manson: Where are you going?
Ben Tennyson: To fetch my spear. We're definitely going to need more fish after this waste!
Daniel Keem: Ben, I think we'll be okay!
~Daniel yells from his tree. Tennyson ignores the advice, making his way across the giant HELP lettering. The fish being used smell. They leak fish blood and guts into the dirt. They are near the river bank. The ground begins to shake…Tennyson freezes~
Prince Ali: Earthquake?
~Abu shrieks! Killer Keemstar and Katz descend quickly and carefully. Frieza looks around, he spots a cross impaled nearby. It seems to be the shakiest spot~
Frieza: No way…
~We cut out~
IMMUNITY CHALLENGE
~Chris McLean is aboard a helicopter flying over the Amazon. He's strapped to a chair making his position far safer than it looks. He's leaning near an opening, staring down. His hair is flying in a thousand different directions. A headset is over his head. He speaks into it~
Chris McLean: How much further?
~He receives an answer, nodding along. He turns his attention to the camera~
Chris McLean: Alright, in just a few minutes we'll be flying over the Paradigm Camp. Sitting next to me is a member of a South American rescue team. He's an expert on what to look for when discerning whether or not a situation is truly distressful. He will observe both camps from above and declare a winner!
~Something catches Chris's eye~
Chris McLean: Ah! It looks as though the Paradigm Tribe is straight ahead. Mr. Silva! We're almost there!
~A middle aged man of South American heritage leans forward, nodding. He turns and stares out the other side of the chopper. They fly over the Paradigm Tribe…the members are standing proudly, pointing at their creation. They have constructed two giant 'S' formations using giant, dark logs. They are extremely visible. The prestige, however, is the O. It's the homemade Jacuzzi from Calvin Veil's hut…the water is a dark, blood red. It swirls around, creating a hypnotic vortex. It is quite the image~
Chris McLean: Wow! That is amazing! What do you think, Mr. Silva?
Mr. Silva: It is striking! I believe they have used animal blood in the water. Very distressful. I cannot see how this can be topped. One of the most distressful images I've ever seen.
Chris McLean: Wonderful! I'd drop the crate now…but we must follow procedure. We'll hurry over the Savage Tribe, make a quick U turn and deliver the goods to the winning Paradigm Tribe
Mr. Silva: Sounds good! Nothing can top what I've seen, in my expert opinion.
~Quietly they await the Savage Tribe's demonstration with minimal expectations. The chopper flies over trees, canvassing a large portion of the jungle. The river appears in the distance. They are close~
Chris McLean: We're almost there! Just beyond the trees!
~The chopper sails over the trees, revealing the Savage Tribe. Chris nearly falls out of the chopper. Thank goodness for his restraints! NEW ERA Cartoon Crossover, BABY! Mr. Silva goes silent~
Chris McLean: Is that…what is that?!
Mr. Silva: El Diablo!
~Screams echo throughout the Amazon. We look down and see a bunch of undead monkeys running around, sucking the blood from fish and attempting to do the same to members of the Savage Tribe. Tennyson throws his spear, impaling one. It's dead – for a moment. It rises up, like an unkillable slasher. It removes the spear and hobbles towards Tennyson. Abu screams, throwing rocks at them. Katz and Daniel are kicking them away, trying to smash their heads. Sam stands in the background thinking she should be getting paid more. Ali tries to reason with them, citing Abu being their relative. Frieza beheads one of them. The body continues to move around while the head, face down, eats dirt~
Chris McLean: Are those…are those UNDEAD monkeys?
Mr. Silva: Vampire monkeys! This…this is the most distressful thing these eyes have ever seen!
~Chris kicks the crate out of the chopper. In such a hurry to get away, he forgets to open the chute. The falling crate creates a shadow. The vampire monkeys run underneath it, preferring shade. It SMASHES on top of them, crushing them instantly. Even if they AREN'T dead, they are in such tiny parts that they couldn't possibly do any harm. The Savage Tribe stands around for a moment…they finally realized what's happened. Not only did they WIN the challenge…but the vampire monkeys are no longer a threat! They begin to rejoice as they remove the items from the crate. It's a new flag, paint cans and brushes…all the makings for a new tribe logo~
Chris McLean: In an unexpected turn of events the Savage Tribe's entirely way too distressful situation has upset the perfectly constructed SOS over at camp Paradigm! So, it appears as though the Paradigm Tribe has lost the final team challenge and will be seeing ME at Tribal Council later tonight!
~Chris, Mr. Silva and the chopper fly away. We fade out~
PARADIGM TRIBE – DAY 27 – POST IMMUNITY CHALLENGE
~It's getting late. Leafy and Whis continue to watch the sky. Their eagerness has long gone. Realization is setting in. Samurai Jack and Spencer shake their heads, frustrated. DeFranco is in the background, cooking the pork. The aroma of roasting pork tickles the olfactory senses belonging to the other four. Whis looks at his idea put into art~
Angel Whis: I'm shocked we didn't win.
Calvin Veil: Yea, we either lost or that plane went down.
Richard Spencer: Fucking Chris…conspiracy is against us. I've got a feeling this Daniel Coyote guy is going to fuck all us old guys over.
Samurai Jack: All the more reason for me to not return to the ring.
Phillip DeFranco: Pork is ready!
~One by one they turn and head toward an impending feast. Whis is the last man left to linger. He kicks at some sand and shakes his head~
Angel Whis: Oh well.
~He joins his tribe for one last feast. The group of five dining together for one final meal before tribal council and the merge~
TRIBAL COUNCIL
~The Paradigm Tribe arrives at Tribal Council. They each place their torch down and take a seat. Chris nods, feeling a tremendous sense of déjà vu~
Chris McLean: Alright, welcome to Tribal Council! Another tough loss earlier this afternoon…two straight close losses…Richard, does it hurt more to lose a close challenge?
Richard Spencer: Every time I lose to that tribe it feels like jacking off to pictures of Rosie Keem with razor blades. It fucking sucks.
Chris McLean: Wow…now THAT would have been a truly distressful sight.
Angel Whis: Since you bring up distress…how did we lose, exactly?
Chris McLean: You guys had a great design…GREAT design and we were ready to declare your tribe victorious. However, once we saw the Savage Tribe…I mean, words can't describe. It was like hell on earth.
Angel Whis: Hell on Earth? Explain that to me…
Chris McLean: You'd have to see it, honestly. I would have taken a picture but, well, I didn't.
Richard Spencer: Weak ass host.
Angel Whis: Hmm.
Chris McLean: Just trust me on this one, guys. Samurai Jack! You've been sort of flying under the radar…are we seeing a new, changed Samurai Jack?
Samurai Jack: I don't know.
Chris McLean: Alright! Leafy…you seemed to be on the chopping block last week. When Lola Bunny was voted off you were, in my opinion, the most surprised member of the tribe. How are you feeling tonight?
Calvin Veil: Not good. I've been loyal…I've done all I can. I'd like to make the merge so, we'll see.
Chris McLean: The merge is upon us, Phillip. Thoughts?
Phillip DeFranco: IT'S ABOUT TIME
Chris McLean: Agreed! Well, it's that time…time to vote!
~The super intense voting music plays. One by one the Paradigm members approach the voting box and cast a name down. Once they've all returned Chris stands and retrieves the votes. He returns to his spot of judgment~
Chris McLean: If anybody has a hidden immunity idol and would like to play it…now would be the time to do so.
~Spencer laughs. Samurai Jack rolls his eyes. DeFranco moves his hands as if to say 'get on with it.' Whis remains composed…Leafy sighs~
Chris McLean: Once the votes are read the decision is final. The person with the most votes will be asked to leave the tribal council area immediately. I'll read the votes!
First vote….Calvin Veil
Second vote…Calvin Veil
Third vote…Richard Spencer
That's two votes Leafy, one vote Spencer…I'll continue
Fourth vote….and the tenth person voted out of Cartoon Crossover Survivor…Calvin Veil
~Leafy stands and heads for his torch. As he does the other four members of the Paradigm tribe stand. One by one they shake his hand out of respect. Leafy reaches Chris and places his torch into the ground~
Chris McLean: Leafy, the tribe has spoken. It's time for you to go
~Leafy watches his fire extinguish. He turns and nods toward the remaining four members of the Paradigm Tribe. He then exits the tribal council area~
Chris McLean: Another tough vote…they will only get tougher from this point forward. With a merge on the horizon a lot of questions will surely rise. You can all head back to camp…busy day tomorrow!
~The final four Paradigm members stand, grab their torches and exit~
NEXT TIME ON Cartoon Crossover SURVIVOR: THE MERGE! Yes, the merge is here! The Savage and Paradigm Tribes merge and the game shifts from team to individual warfare! Alliances will be tested…loyalties questioned…the biggest vote of the game so far will go down…all next week on Cartoon Crossover Survivor!
~We cut to Leafy sitting in front of the camera. His face and clothes is as fresh and coherent as it was on day 1~
Calvin Veil: Losing all those challenges did me in. Had we won just one other challenge, I might have won. Sucks. Oh well…good luck to the veterans from the Paradigm Tribe. And, if anybody needs a Jacuzzi built.
Calvin Veil laughs about him discovering this obscure skill.
Leafyishere: I will be making a TON of YouTube as soon as I return home. This was fun, I want to let everyone know this was an amazing experience.
~We cut out and fade to black~
