"I'll be with you… forever," Her voice was soft, and her hand rested on his shoulder like it was meant to be there, with just enough pressure to remind him that she was real, that this moment was just as tangible as the lapis lazuli ring he was twisting in his hand. He couldn't stop himself from thinking that she was perfect. Alright, maybe she was far from perfect, but she was perfect for him. With her, while she was looking at him with those eyes and making his heart jump with every word… forever wasn't long enough. And then, her lips curled up into a little smirk when she added, "if I want," as if she had other plans. But he knew otherwise. He knew where her future rested just as well as she did.
And then, she leaned forward and kissed him. Or maybe he kissed her. They'd done it a thousand times, and yet, every single kiss was different. He could practically taste the love on her mouth, feel the compassion in her touch. It was not too long, or too short, but the numbness lingered on his lips long after she pulled away.
She absently licked her lips."I'm going to get through this, just like we get through everything." He gazed at her as she stared off at the front yard of the Salvatore mansion. The view from the roof was nothing special really, but next to her, it was. "One day at a time."
One day at a time. That sounded like a plan.
"We should get inside before sunrise," she sighed.
Before the frown could settle into her face, he opened his palm, never tearing his gaze away from hers. "Bonnie made this for you yesterday," he began, a grin pulling his lips up when the pleasant shock registered in her face. He offered it to her, feeling his heart race a little more. Nothing made him happier than to bring her joy. Nothing. "Just in case."
"Daylight ring?" she asked, her voice replete with wonder and surprise.
With a little nod, he gently raised her hand up and placed the blue gem on her finger. He couldn't help but feel a bit giddy as he did this… how ridiculous was that? After all of these years he could still get giddy. As the ring slid onto her finger, he wondered what it would look like if it had been a diamond instead; what would the expression on her face be then?
"One day at a time, right?" he repeated.
She kissed him again.
He closed his eyes and swore to himself that he would never forget this moment.
Stefan winced when the light shone into his eyes, snapping him out of the dream. With a groan, he lifted his arms to cover the brightness. "What the—"
"Rise and shine, Steffy!" Damon's voice was loud and obnoxious. "It's been a few days since you decided to drop back on earth, and you're going to school today."
The younger Salvatore rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling, trying to analyze the lucid dream he had just experienced. His heart was still racing! He was filled with this strange sense of euphoria that shook him to the bone in the best of ways. The girl… In that dream, she had been the core of his existence, the purpose to his every breath, and for those first moments as he woke, every movement he made seemed to have meaning. He tried to remember her face and voice, but when he did, he came up blank. All he knew was that her voice sounded something like a symphony and her eyes contained a world of their own. But he could not visualize her.
"Hello? Please don't be one of those pain-in-the-ass teenage brothers who needs to be dragged out of bed. Because I will do it," Damon teased, that ever present smirk glued to his face.
Stefan blinked. "Damon," he muttered dazedly, having completely forgotten that his brother was there. "School?"
Damon rolled his eyes. "Did you forget what that was too? Well, it's this really fun place that you seem to really like where you have to write papers and—"
"I know what school is," Stefan huffed, sitting up slowly. For a brief moment, when he thought about getting out of bed, he could have sworn that his heart leaped in excitement; maybe it was a phantom action he'd experienced before.
I will see her again, a distant part in his mind whispered, and he shivered.
That dream, there was no way it'd been just that. It was a memory. He knew it. She was real. Their plans for forever had been real.
Then, with a loud exhale, Stefan turned to Damon. "How old am I?" he questioned. Damon, who was fixing shades –trying to dramatically show that he felt like he was Stefan's mother—suddenly turned.
"You're seventeen," he answered simply, arching a brow. "I thought you knew that much."
Stefan nodded, pensive. "Oh. I'm not… I don't know… older?" In that dream, the possibility of forever had been so real to him. Like he actually planned to love her and be with her for the rest of eternity.
Damon smirked once again. "Sorry, Brother, but you're not twenty-one yet. So if you want to go partying with a bunch of sorority girls…" When Damon's comment did not get a chuckle out of Stefan, who was now a little annoyed by his usage of the word brother, Damon dropped the act. "You want the real answer?"
Stefan nodded.
"Promise not to freak out?"
Stefan nodded.
"Do you want an explanation first or…"
Crossing his arms over his chest, he shook his head. "Tell me, Damon."
Damon held his breath. "A century and a half, give or take thirteen years." When Stefan did nothing but nod, the older Salvatore wondered if his brother had heard him right. "Okay, well, I meant give. One hundred and sixty three. You're one hundred and sixty three, Stefan."
"Okay."
"Okay?"
Stefan looked up at his brother, shrugging. "I guess that feels right."
Damon looked at his brother like he had two heads. "That feels right? You do realize that being more than a century old kind of exceeds the lifespan of a person, right? It's not normal."
Stefan stretched and moved over to his drawer of clothes before turning to his brother, a somewhat aggravated expression on his tired face. "How am I supposed to know what normal is?" Somewhat forcefully, he opened a drawer and looked through shirts.
Damon frowned. "Look, you wanted an answer, and I gave it to you."
Stefan sighed, trying to look more concentrated on shirts than the conversation at hand. "How old are you?"
Uncomfortably, Damon replied, "Older than you."
Stefan dropped the shirt, turning to face Damon. "If we're not normal, then what are we?"
Damon wanted to be anywhere but in this room. "Vampires, Stefan. We're vampires. Caroline is, too." As soon as he said the words, he wanted to take them back. He didn't want to drag his brother back into this world; ignorance would have been more than fine, for it wouldn't be long before Stefan –even without his memories—started to feel remorse. "Well, you're not a vampire anymore. You're normal now, like Elena. When you came back from… going missing… you were human. We don't know why, but call it a blessing. Trust me."
Stefan furrowed his brows. If he had been a vampire, then he was planning to live forever, right? And the girl from his dream was a vampire too and probably still was.
How was he going to live forever with her now?
The school bell rang loudly, signaling the start of lunch.
"That's a really bad noise," Stefan observed, wincing a bit. Caroline laughed and dragged him through the hallway, firmly holding his arm as they navigated through the sea of people. Occasionally, an unfamiliar person would look at him and give a very enthusiastic "hey, Stefan!" to which he did not know how to respond, so Caroline would say "sorry, amnesia," and continue to drag him along.
When they got outside, Stefan was itching to talk to his friend. Once they were far away from everyone, he asked, "How long have you been a vampire?"
Her blue eyes widened, and she stopped moving. "How do you know about that?" she whispered a little too loudly. "What are you talking about?"
"Damon told me everything. I was a vampire before I went missing," Stefan answered honestly, his mind spinning a mile a minute, his eyes alit with this strange enthusiasm and curiosity that Caroline couldn't quite place. "Vampires can't die, right? They live forever?"
"Why would Damon do that!" she exploded, her fists clenched. As they walked, and Caroline ranted about how irresponsible and terrible the older Salvatore was, they approached a tree, where Elena was sitting. They took a seat, as Caroline continued to mumble on and on about how she liked Stefan so much better. "He shouldn't have told you."
Elena slowly turned up. "Shouldn't have told who what?" she asked, her eyes quickly falling on Stefan. She turned away before he would notice, her heart aching a little more every time he absently glanced at her.
"Damon told Stefan all about vampires! He knows!" Caroline said furiously.
Elena frowned and glanced at Stefan, who was quietly and politely trying to interrupt her friend's rant. "I mean, you do have a right to know," she tried.
"Damon can't keep his mouth shut!" Caroline complained, quickly excusing herself to go make an angry phone call with Damon. She walked a few hundred feet away, and Stefan laughed to himself when he heard her screaming.
"Do you think I should tell her that I asked Damon about it first?" he smiled. Elena smiled back a little bit, despite the fact that every glance at him filled her with guilt.
She forced herself to laugh. "How did you know to ask about vampires?" she asked. "Did you find a blood bag in the trashcan?"
"Not exactly," Stefan said, before biting his lip and glancing down to hide a bashful smile. Elena couldn't help but think that he looked so young. For the first time in a long time, he looked seventeen, and Elena actually smiled with him. When Stefan turned his head up again, he was whispering. "If I tell you something, promise you won't tell Damon."
She cautiously agreed.
"You know how I said I wanted to start over?" he asked, and when Elena smiled and nodded, Stefan kept going, his whole face lighting up. "I think I figured out how to do that."
"How?"
"I had a dream last night," Stefan started; she'd never seen him so excited. "A memory. I was on the roof of the mansion, Elena, and I was with this girl, a vampire. And I don't really remember what love is, but I'm almost positive that that's what it was, because she… she was… everything. Anyway, we were talking about forever and I put this ring on her finger. I wanted to be with her for the rest of my life. Until the world ended, and even after. More than anything in the world Elena."
Elena's face dropped. She remembered that night perfectly, the night that she drank human blood and started off her life as a vampire. She'd promised Stefan forever. They were so in love, but everything fell through because of her. Because of her and Damon. But Stefan remembered her. It was his first real memory! Half of her wanted to hold him tight and tell him she was the vampire who still wanted that, but the other half forced her to sit still. Don't say anything, Elena, her conscience whispered. You'll just break him again. You break everything you touch.
She swallowed thickly, trying to stay composed. "That's… that's great that you're remembering things. Do you… know what… who she was?" Her heart twisted. Was she hoping that he would look into her eyes and recognize her as the girl he so madly loved?
Stefan shook his head sadly, though the light in his eyes did not go out. "I can't remember her face, but she is beautiful. I know it." He leaned a little closer, his face full of wonder as he said, "This girl is a vampire, so she has to be alive somewhere, right? I don't know how long ago it was, and I don't know what happened between us, but I'm going to find her."
Elena's world froze over. "Stefan…"
"You don't understand, Elena. I know it sounds crazy, but there's nothing I want more than to be with this girl. And it would mean so much to me if you'd help me find her."
Her heart was going to beat out of her chest, her eyes about to burst with fresh tears. How was she supposed to tell Stefan that the girl he once loved was long gone? The girl he loved wanted to be with him more than words could explain… but she was far too broken because she had broken him…
But how could she crush the hope in his eyes? How could she tell him that the world he'd been thrown into was much worse than he initially anticipated, that love was more complicated and earth shattering than he thought?
"Yeah, I'll help you," Elena finally said.
After all, she needed to find that girl again, too.
A/N: A big plot twist! I was really nervous about updating this chapter because I don't think it's my best work. I hope you guys liked it anyway! Please let me know. Every review means so much, and I am not kidding when I say that it inspires me to get another update up. I read every comment and they mean so much to me. As long as you want me to update, I will.
So, Stefan wants to find love again with this "mystery girl" who is really looking him right in the eyes! Will Elena ever be able to tell Stefan that she in fact is the girl he thinks he's trying to find, or will he discover her all on his own? And will Stefan ever learn that he actually died? Please let me know what you're thinking of this plot. Tell me what you loved, what you hated, and what you want to see, etc! Thank you so much and I hope you all had/have a good holiday! :)
Xoxo,
Sara :)
