Hey guys! I'm sorry that I could not upload within a month like I planned to do but I wanted this one to turn out as good as possible and with work and uni stuff keeping me busy it was a little bit hard to find the time to write.
As always; I do not own digimon, but I own my OCs!
English is not my first language, please excuse possible errors. (oh and there are still parts of sentences being deleted when I upload the file on this site... idk why but SORRY)
I'm done playing nice
My legs hurt. My eyes burn. And my head is spinning.
The thick, heavy, grey clouds are hanging low in the night's sky, darkening the whole area to the point of being unbearable…This darkness seems to press me down on the ground. The smell of burnt land and blood that oozed into the ground is still as present as ever, burning my nostrils and causing the nausea to worsen.
It's absolutely silent. I can hear my shallow breaths and my steady heartbeat. The only thing that still rings in my ears is the sorrowful cries of people I can't remember. They were in deep pain before they died.
I've seen this before... why am I here again?
I take a step forward before my gaze falls on the ground and I spot a rose. It's a tiny red rose that somehow managed to break through the hard, burnt soil. Strong little ro –
Wait. No.
This happened before. I can remember dreaming this!
Am I waiting for someone?
No... No I'm all alone. I'm the only one left.
Why? Where is everybody?
My gaze, as naturally as ever, wanders over the destroyed landscape where a few hours before – I remember – I was fighting.
But who was I fighting? And with whom? And where are they now?
A few meters afield I spot a stock of blonde hair. He's lying on his stomach, his face buried in dirt. From where I am standing right now, I can see the shimmer of his ring I know so well; it's the same I am wearing. My breath hitches and I feel my heart sink.
This...This is new.
If he's here then...
I turn around and draw in a sharp breath. Every inch of me tightens and I feel like there is not enough air anymore. A pain I never experienced before dares to drive me insane right here and now, clouding my mind and waking up the desire to scream out. Hot tears well up in my eyes, blurring my sight.
No baby please no.
I stumble over to her lifeless body and as if someone just took away every bit of strength I still had I collapse next to her. I force my arms to move and grab her by her shoulders, placing the upper part of her body on my lab.
I try my hardest to ignore the weird greyish color of her skin. She's okay. She's just... sleeping.
Right?
It has to be it. She's drained from the battle… I am sure she fought like a champ. She always does.
She's just sleeping…
Just… resting.
My gaze sticks to the dark ground in front of me. I don't dare to look around more. I don't want to risk seeing anyone else.
I feel sick.
What happened? Why the hell can't I remember a thing?!
Suddenly a pair of feet appears in my field of vision, causing me to look up into his merciless blue eyes.
"You should have killed me when you had the chance."
His voice feels like someone just slapped me across my face, waking me up from a trance I was in. I can feel the coldness spreading through my whole body, slowing down my accelerated heartbeat and calming my nerves. The voices I've been ignoring for most of the time grow louder but I push them away the best I can. I can feel the foreign power begging me to give in to it. But I am not on the edge.
Not yet.
"I will get my chance again." I whisper and immediately frown; I don't even recognize my own voice anymore.
"How? You're all alone now."
The voices grow louder... and damn. I look down on her angelic, dead, face. Her crimson eyes are still wide open, her expression one of pure horror.
There's really no point in fighting it anymore is it? She's gone, it makes no sense holding onto my old self longer…
Maybe I am on the edge after all...
Instead of refusing I embrace the ice-cold grip on my heart… Take it with you, and never give it back to me. I don't need it anymore.
I don't want to feel like this.
I will never feel like this again.
I jolt awake and sit up, holding onto my head because I feel like it will explode any second. I can feel my vivid heartbeat in my throat, making me kind of sick and light headed all at once.
A nightmare... it was only a freaking nightmare. Again.
Or was it?!
I turn around in a second and breathe out in deep relief when I see my girl sleeping next to me, her burgundy hair draped on her cushions and her arms wrapped around the edge of her blanket. She looks peaceful, and save.
I slowly massage the spot on my chest, right above my heart. Although it hurts like a bitch to touch myself, I can't help it... somehow my heart feels cold.
So. Damn. Cold.
ALEC'S POV
The sound of the computer refusing the password sounds again, for the millionth time tonight. I groan in frustration and lean back in my seat, staring at the giant letters in front of me.
ACCESS DENIED. NOT PHOENIX?
Duh... how do I tell a freaking computer that the person who knows the password is dead?
I grab the bottle in my lap and take a gulp before I give it another shot. Without much hope I type; Phoenix is the best.
Only to be met with another annoying sound and the screen lighting up in a red light. Access denied.
My dick is bigger than anyone else's – BEEP – Access denied.
Phoenix handsome guy – BEEP – Access denied.
"God dammit!"
"I see you didn't lose your temper after all these years. Simple things could always make you so mad, so fast."
I turn around to the source of the voice and see Gennai entering the command center, steaming cup in his hand and a smile on his face. I quickly check the time – 5.14am – and shot him a questioning glance.
"What on earth are you doing here?"
His smile grows before he takes a seat at the table where we hold our meetings:" I could ask you the same thing."
I just shrug before I look up the screen again:" I'm trying to log into the general system of the base but it requires his password."
"Why do you need to log in?"
"I don't know if Beelzemon had the chance to share all the information he had about our systems with the other ones. If so, I want to change everything before they come up with the idea to storm our base a second time."
Gennai looks at me with an unreadable expression before he looks up to the screen:" You should try something simple. Phoenix was a very obvious person, if you really think about it."
The sheer mention of his name makes me twitch unwillingly. But as soon as Gennai's words sink in another thought pops up in my head and I lean forward, typing another password; Alec1780.
I knit my eyes and wait for the well – known beeping sound and the screen to light up again but to my endless relief I hear a "Bing" sound and the screen turns green; ACCESS GRANTED.
I gape stupidly at the screen before realization hits me and I feel my chest tightening at the same time as my sight gets blurry.
That sentimental dick.
I try to take deep breaths but that freaking hole in my chest makes it hard. I carefully place my hand over the heavy bandages and calm down before I lean back again. There's really no time for this shit anymore, I let myself slip enough.
Another "Bing" sound coming from the computer next to me makes me turn around and once again, look at Gennai in confusion. As much as I noticed, Gennai doesn't have anything to do with the systems in the base, nor is he really interested in it.
"What are you doing?"
He opens several windows, ignoring me completely. It takes him a few minutes before he opens an E – mail and pushes the "answer" button.
"Gennai wha – "
"The sovereigns contacted me after the funeral."
I turn my chair around so I can face Gennai properly. Alone the mention of this group of bastards irritates me.
"What do they want?"
Gennai shots me a glance out of the corner of his eye before he sighs deeply:" Well, Phoenix is dead so... we need a replacement."
My frown deepens and I can feel the anger inside of me being awakened:" My brother's corpse isn't even cold yet and they are already looking for a freaking replacement?!"
Gennai sighs again before he shots me an apologetic smile:" I feel very sorry for your loss Alec. But this world needs someone who controls the dimensions."
I grit my teeth in frustration before another realization hits me, fueling the anger inside of me:" They surely will choose Tai."
"Most likely."
My heart beats painfully inside my chest and I grip the chair's handles;" Tai already is overwhelmed by all of this. Giving him such a big responsibility will crush him."
Gennai only shrugs:" It's not for us to decide. Neither do we have a right to question the sovereign's decisions. They await us in Fanglomon's temple today."
I cross my arms and turn my chair around again, willing to end this conversation sooner rather than later:" Cool. Have fun then."
I hear his chair moving and only a second later I feel him staring at me. I shift uncomfortably in my seat, forcing my gaze to stay on the screen of the computer right in front of me where I opened the main security program.
"You have to come too Alec."
Fucking hell? I wasn't expecting that. I didn't think I'd ever see any of them again.
"These sick bastards", I mumble under my breath.
"They specifically asked for your presence."
"Why would they do that? Last time I saw Fanglomon was when I tried to kill him." I still remember how I've felt when my blade was only inches away from Fanglomon's throat, slash it. On that day I almost made a mistake I would've regretted forever. Thank god my little brother was there to stop me then.
Now there's no one who could stop me when I'd lose it again...
As ironically as my life is right now the door opens and reveals the only person who – at least somehow – could replace my brother. I feel my body temperature sink, synchronizing with his in doing so and my heart beat accelerating. I can't help but frown lightly, shooting him a concerned look which he registers, but choses to ignore.
"Tai! How come you're up at this early hour?" Gennai asks confusion visible on his face.
Tai only shrugs before he comes to a halt right next to me.
"I came to find it out myself but since you're here you surely can answer my question", he starts, catching my interest in an instant.
Something is seriously wrong with him. I can see it in his colorless eyes:" Ask then."
"It's about our troops. What are they doing right now?"
Why would he want to know that?
"They are defending our borders, but being pushed back constantly. The dark armies are very strong and after the attack at our base a lot of digimon are still recovering", Gennai answers the question for me.
Tai's expression darkens immediately and he frowns lightly. I can see the skin on his jaw stretching, indicating that he is grinding his teeth.
"You're not content with this?"
He looks down at me again before he slowly shakes his head:" I'm done being defensive. We should seriously take action and advance. I want everyone who is able to fight to go out there."
Gennai's face drains from all color and I myself have to take a deep breath to register the meaning of his words. Advancing at the front would mean a lot of loss for us. As much as I know from Piximon who's right there, there are no chances for us to even hold up our defense.
Advancing? That would be suicide. And he knows that.
I slowly shake my head, mirroring his gesture from before. I grab him by his arm, pulling him down so I can whisper in his ear:" you're obviously in no condition to make such important decisions now."
I let go of him and he slowly straightens his posture. I can see the storm behind his eyes but to my great relief there is no refusal. He knows that I saw right through him.
"Well. Make sure to tell the digidestined. We leave in a few hours", Gennai says the last part to me and leaves us two alone in the command center.
Tai takes Gennai's empty seat and shots me a questioning glance:" Where are we going Alec?"
I turn my chair around again:" How are you feeling Tai?"
He just rolls his eyes and crosses his arms before his chest;" You want to go down that path now? Really? Maybe I should ask you how you're feeling then?"
His colorless eyes blaze in amusement. I can't help but grin lightly:" We have to visit the harmonious ones. Seeing that my brother is dead they have to choose a new "god".
He lifts one eyebrow, annoyance clear on his face:" the AUDACITY!" He throws his arms out in frustration.
"Your brother is dead for what? 5 minutes?"
I can only shrug:" Tell me about it."
He balls his hands into fists, relaxing them, only to ball them again. His chest rises and falls heavily before I hear him mumble under his breath:" maybe we should kill one of them and see how long it will take them to find replacement."
As much as I feel the urge to laugh out loud I can't ignore the fact that these words just came out of Tai's mouth. No matter how angry he is... he would never say something like this.
"They'll probably choose me, right?" He says, looking up to me again. The amused glint in his eyes is gone.
I can only nod:" Probably."
"Great... more responsibility." He rolls his eyes again and leans back in his seat, bending his right knee and placing his crossed arms on it.
"Well. Everyone believes in you and trusts you."
As if someone just switched off the lights inside of him, his gaze turns cloudier:" They shouldn't."
Uh oh...
"What happened?" I whisper, in fear that if I ask any louder he will shut me out completely.
He shifts in his seat and repeats his hand flexing shit a few times before he mumbles an answer that freezes me up in an instant:" I think I might've given in in my dream."
"You had a nightmare?"
He just nods.
Suddenly I am transformed to a lifetime I shut my mind off completely. The days after the demon lords found me. The days when I was fighting against this foreign power inside of me. Up to the moment when I just grew tired of refusing and just embraced it.
As much as I remember, a path of destruction and death followed that very moment. I still remember the deep drive, to cause as much pain as possible, inside of me.
But Tai is... different. He's just sitting there, seeming more thoughtful than he ever was.
If he really gave in, why is this base still intact? Why didn't he try to kill any of us yet? And why isn't BlackWargreymon walking around these corridors?
"What was the dream about?" I ask the first question that comes up my mind.
He takes his sweet time to respond, but I am just glad he does:" It was the very first vision I had from your life. It was the day when you were standing on the burnt battlefield and you found your dead team. But this time it was mine."
My breath hitches and once again, my chest tightens in deep pain. That was the day I've found Nadia, dead, in the dirt. This time it wasn't me who caused Tai to see this, which means that they did that. They knew how to drive him to the edge, and it was a sick way of doing it.
I don't blame him for his actions... I did the same.
"We will take care of it", I lean forward and place a hand on his arm, causing him to look into my eyes.
"I will help you, tonight, after the visit with the harmonious ones. Until then I want you to shut your mouth. Don't tell anyone anything; they won't understand."
He stares into my eyes before he slowly nods. The anger is wiped off his face and replaced by something completely different.
He looks terrified.
GENNAI'S POV
If I wouldn't feel their aura, I'd be sure that I am walking through the forest alone. No one said anything since we left the base, not even the Digimon.
Matt, Ken, Davis, Mimi, Tai and Alec are all accompanying me. The rest had to stay behind since the safety of the base is our biggest priority at the moment. There are way too much injured Digimon and the security system is still updating.
The nearer we come to the temple of Fanglomon, the brighter it gets. We left the thick, grey mist and the never – ending night behind us a few hours ago, walking in a more comfortable environment, filled with a lot of green and bright, colorful flowers. I was hoping that at least the blue sky would light up their mood somehow, but I was bitterly disappointed.
Mimi was the only one who commented on the weather, followed by a murmur or agreement. And that was it.
Every one pretty much shared Alec's opinion about the sovereigns being indelicate since they 'dared' to call us shortly after Phoenix' death. I myself have trouble to obey their call, but I can't deny the fact that somehow, they are right. If we leave the dimensions without a guardian, hell will break loose.
Without me even intending to, my gaze wanders over to Tai who is walking right next to Alec. His arms are wrapped around his torso and his gaze is directed down on the ground. His hair falls into his face but I don't have to take a look at his eyes to know that his one brown eye lost its color too. I could tell in the morning already that something elementary changed in that boy. I fear the worst... and I instantly hope that the sovereigns don't burden him with another huge task. Alec was right when he said it would crush him.
Not only that... but giving especially him so much more power? That would be insane...
As if he feels my gaze he slowly lifts his head and nervously runs his fingers through his hair. He shots me a questioning glance out of his ice – grey eyes; I only shake my head and turn around again, ignoring the fact that I feel like I've just traveled in time and met Alec's younger version.
"Gennai, this is it, right? I remember it form last time", Matt speaks up. His gaze sticks to the giant, white gate in front of us.
I give him a quick nod and raise my hand to knock on the door or something since this is the first time I came here afoot, but before I can reach the white wood, the gate opens right in front of us, revealing the broad entrance of Fanglomon's temple.
I take the lead and step foot inside, looking up the stairs that will lead us to the harmonious ones –
"Tai, you okay?" Matt's voice drives my attention back to the others and I turn around.
Matt is standing next to Tai's bent figure, looking down at him in concern. I'm just about to approach him when Alec makes me stop by raising one of his hands. He slowly kneels down in front of Tai and looks him right into his eyes. I don't know what he is telling him but just a second later Tai grabs Matt's hand that was resting on his shoulder and straightens his posture.
"I'm fine Matt, just... don't let go", he says before he clutches the blonde's hand in his. Matt just gives him a nod before he shares a look with Alec. Alec just gives us a smile that doesn't reach his eyes and passes me.
Uh oh…
"Let's go have some fun then."
"I really cannot imagine what you consider fun in this kind of situation", a new voice sounds, coming from upstairs. I look up to the bird – like digimon and feel the cold shiver run down my spine; Zhuqiaomon looks down on us, no emotion visible on his face, before he slowly turns around.
"Follow me. Let's get this over with."
MATT'S POV
My arm is numb, but I choose to ignore it for now. Whatever the hell happened to my best friend; it was enough to scare him, bad.
He's clutching my hand with his right, and now even my arm with his left hand. I can feel him shaking right beside me. His breath is shallow and his face drained from all color, as well as his eyes. His lower lip trembles lightly and I can see him sweating.
"Bro, what the hell is wrong with you?" I whisper, low enough so no one can hear me.
We walk through a rather long, by torches illuminated corridor and it doesn't look like we come to a halt any minute.
Tai takes some time until he responds:" I – I don't know Matt. I don't think I should be in here."
What the fuck?
I knit my eyebrows and look at him in confusion. His expression reminds me of one of a trapped animal. He eyes his surroundings nervously and keeps mumbling under his breath.
"No... No I should not be here."
"Tai listen – "
"I have to get out of here Matt I –"
"Tai!"
"I can't be in here –"
"Hey!" Alec's voice causes both of us to jerk. I look up and see a bright light at the end of the corridor. Alec follows my gaze before he turns towards us again. He grabs Tai by his arm and forces him to look into his eyes.
"I told you to get a grip. It's now or never. If you give them a reason to think something is wrong with you, you give them every reason to lock you away. Or worse."
I stupidly gape at Alec before I shot Tai a questioning glance which he only returns by shrugging his shoulders. Alec shots us one final glance before he follows the other ones into the room. Tai's just about to follow him when I grab his arm and turn him around again, forcing him to face me.
"What happened?" I'm done giving him time and not pushing him. I want answers. Now
"I – I'm not supposed to talk about it but", he looks me right into my eyes:" I gave in, I think."
I hear the blood rushing in my ears and the nausea creeping up but I refuse to let myself slip now:" what do you mean?"
He takes a step forward and places his hands on either side of my face. I can see his eyes glistering suspiciously:" Whatever the hell happens today, or tomorrow, or whenever this power inside of me will kick in – and trust me, it will – promise me you keep the others save."
My first instinct is to refuse, to tell him that he lost his mind. My second instinct is to drive my fist into his face as hard as I can and hope that it will get him back to normal. But this is not the time to trust in my instincts now. I've known this man in front of me for so long now that I trust in every word he says. I know I used not to... but I learned to. And I never regretted it until now. This is why I give him a nod. There's no point in arguing now anyway.
"Whatever it takes."
ALEC'S POV
I nervously look at the entrance and let out a sigh of relief when I spot the last ones entering the hall. I focused all my attention to Tai and Matt's whereabouts so I had a reason not to face any of the harmonious ones who are all gathered in front of us on their respective seats.
Fanglomon is sitting in the middle of them, flanked by Zhuqiaomon and Ebonwumon on his left, and Azulongmon and Baihumon on his right side. Each of them looks at us with an unreadable expression. I feel Davis shift uncomfortably next to me.
"What is it, kid?" I whisper as quietly as possible.
"I don't know man... I don't feel too comfortable here", he whispers back, looking around nervously. His gaze sticks to Tai who comes to a halt right next to me, flanked by Matt who refuses to leave his side. Judged by Matt's expression I can tell that Tai told him the truth. He glares at me before he turns his attention to the five holy digigods in front of us. I chose to ignore him for now... it is pointless to cause a scene in front of them. The less they know, the better.
I feel Fanglomon's gaze on me but I focus all my attention to the bright floor. I have to pull on all of the strings of my self – control to not lose my shit right now. The room is dead silent, the only thing I can hear are our respective breaths and some of the digidestined shifting their weight every now and then. But they don't say anything... neither does Gennai. I don't know why but I feel like they are somehow waiting for me to break the silence. Which I will certainly not do.
"Long time no see... you traitor", Baihumon speaks up, causing everyone to jerk and turn to me, since I am the one who was addressed.
I slowly lift my gaze and give my best to hold eye contact with Fanglomon. His expression does not give away anything of what he must be thinking right now.
"Mind to tell me what is so funny?" Ebonwumon asks, literally piercing me up with his eyes.
I didn't even notice the grin on my face until now. I give my best to suppress it somehow and clear my throat, choosing my words wisely...for now:" Memories. I think. I feel nostalgic all of the sudden."
There he goes again, digging his own grave. Great move Alec, awesome... really.
"Did you hear that Fanglomon? He seems like he misses the old times", Zhuqiaomon spits, his voice dropping several tunes, indicating that he is getting angrier. I don't blame him... I'd probably look at me the same way.
"You sure deserve to be killed right here and now", Baihumon says, narrowing his eyes.
His words hit me like lighting and suddenly I feel the control over my mouth slip away:" If any of you thought I came to apologize then I have to disappoint you. Definitely. Not. Happening."
"You never really did anything but disappoint us anyway", Azulongmon joins the conversation. I feel Davis shift next to me and out of the corner of my eye I see him exchanging confused glances with his teammates. They obviously didn't see this side of Azulongmon yet.
The meaning of his words however slowly sink in, only fueling the anger I was desperately trying to keep at bay.
"Same goes for you though", I mumble under my breath, but they heard me just well.
I feel a hot gust of wind blowing in my face and after taking a look at Zhuqiaomon who's angrily adjusting his wings I know why:" You little – "
"ENOUGH! We are not gathered here to discuss our old matters", Fanglomon speaks up for the first time. He doesn't bother to look at me; instead his gaze is directed at the digidestined and Gennai.
"You're right. Our biggest priority is the safety of this world and its dimensions", Gennai says, stealing a glance at a very pale looking Tai. His arms are still wrapped tightly around his torso... and his eyes look like two ice cubes.
"You're right Gennai. At this point... Alec, I am very sorry for your loss." Fanglomon's words feel like someone just splashed ice - cold water into my face. I feel the shiver go down my spine and a weird sensation of sadness wash over me again. I've felt miserable for most of the time right now but hearing Fanglomon say this just took my grief to a whole new level. I feel my sight blur and my chest tightening again but I resist the urge to just give in to my emotions. I am not like that. I will not let them see me like this... it was bad enough that the digidestined did.
Remembering that I still have to react somehow I just nod, waiting for them to continue.
I feel the gazes of the digidestined on me and Tai's hand brushing my arm. I give him a small smile which he only returns before he whispers, so only I can hear him:" Don't worry... I don't think that will take too long."
I imploringly hope you're right boy…
"We lost somebody, yes. Nonetheless we need someone who takes care of this very important task", his gaze wanders over each of the digidestined before it sticks to Tai who seems to literally shrink under the digigod's eyes. He's trembling lightly and I clearly see him grinding his teeth. The longer we're in here, the more I start to think that it was a very bad idea to bring him with us.
If even Davis, an absolutely normal digidestined, does not feel all too well in here... then how must a corrupted one like Tai, feel?
"Fanglomon, please hear me out", Gennai starts but Baihumon only raises one of his paws, silencing him.
"We didn't choose the bearer of courage, if this is what you're worried about Gennai", Azulongmon says, causing literally all of us to gasp in surprise.
As if he just got slapped Tai's head shots up and he stops to tremble in a heartbeat. He slowly lets his arms sink and knits his eyebrows in confusion. I don't really have to make an effort to feel him getting pissed. I grab him by his wrist and whisper as low as possible:" Why does that piss you off?"
He turns towards me and looks me deep into my eyes:" They obviously don't trust me."
I'm just about to answer when I hear everyone gasp, again. I look up to the five digimon and realize that they're all looking at me expectantly. Confusion spreads through me and I look at the others, hoping for any explanation.
They however just eye me with equal surprised expressions.
"Well... I didn't expect that", Mimi whispers.
"I – I thought you hated him?" Davis asks, confusion clear in his voice.
I exchange a glance with Tai who only shrugs and turns around to Matt for any explanation. The blonde is just about to open his mouth when Fanglomon speaks up again.
"As much as he deserves to be locked away, or even killed; there is no one who could do this better than Phoenix' older brother."
Realization hits me and suddenly I feel kind of light – headed. I stumble backwards and only inwardly register that Tai and Davis got a hold on me. My sight blurs again and suddenly I feel very far away. The voices are hushed what makes it harder for me to hear anything they're saying. Everything goes in slow motion.
What the fuck is happening?
All of the sudden I feel a stinging sensation on my left cheek. As if someone just turned up the volume I hear the digidestined calling out my name. I slowly lift my hand towards the aching spot on my face and look up into ocean blue eyes. Matt is still standing in front of me, an apologetic smile on his face.
"Sorry. You just lost it man."
"I know this must be very surprising for you." Fanglomon speaks up again, catching my attention all at once.
"That is the understatement of the year", I whisper more to myself than to anyone in here.
Me? Choosing especially ME for that task? Who on earth told them it would be a good idea to give me more power than I already have? Wasn't it enough that I tried to kill them?
"Alec, this is a good thing", Gennai grabs me by my shoulder, forcing me to look at him. He shots me an intense glare which I can only return in confusion.
"How on earth is this a good thing?!" I reply, not hiding the urgency in my voice anymore.
He drives me closer so he's out of earshot:" If you refuse they will surely choose Tai anyway."
I steal a glance at Tai who's eyeing me nervously. The color of his eyes reminds me of what he confessed to me earlier and suddenly I feel the immense urge to get him out of here as soon as possible. I can deal with this shit later.
I turn around to Fanglomon again and reach out for the digicore he is holding in his hand. The immense sparkle of it reminds me of the one Phoenix had what makes everything only worse. Images of my brother pop up in the back of my head and once again I feel the lump in my throat.
As soon as my fingers touch the core its color changes and resembles a giant ice cube before it vanishes in front of our eyes. I can feel the power run through my veins, strengthening every cell inside of my body. I take deep breaths through my nose in an attempt to ignore the nausea caused by the two completely opposite powers clashing against each other inside of me. Whereas before I could easily ignore the voices coming from the power of darkness they suddenly got louder, clouding my mind once again.
"You'll be okay." Fanglomon assures me.
"You can leave now", Ebonwurmon says, turning away from us already.
"Eh sorry?" Ken speaks up for the first time, driving their attention to him. The digidestined eye him with confused glances.
"I still don't get why you chose Alec over Tai. No offense Alec", he adds the last part directed at me. I just wave him off. That is something I wonder about myself anyway.
There's a rather long silence during the sovereigns exchange a few glances.
"We took everything into consideration and came to the conclusion that Alec would be the best choice since he has more experience", Azulongmon answers.
Bullshit.
"Oh okay – ", Ken says before he gets interrupted by Tai who obviously is fed up with being silent.
"You don't trust me, right?"
Uh oh... bad move. Very bad move.
Zhuqiaomon looks at him bewildered before he answers:" You proved us that you are a very powerful and trust – worthy digidestined Taichi... but nonetheless you're a risk factor."
"He's a what?" Agumon calls out, anger clear on his face.
"How dare you talk to him like that?" Mimi adds, not less angry.
"After everything he went through because of your damn world!" Davis balls his hands into fists, taking a step forward but Tai grabs him by his shoulder, preventing him from doing anything stupid.
I'm too stunned to act right now. So, I chose to stay silent for now and watch Gennai trying to soothe the angry digidestined in front of us.
Try to kill them and they'll forgive you... but offending their leader? Oh boy...
"Guys, let's just go", I find my voice again and grab Tai by his wrist, pulling him out of here. The sovereigns don't even bother to answer, let alone take another glance at any of us. Gennai grabs Davis and Matt and pulls them out too. Ken and Mimi follow us reluctantly but not without glaring at Fanglomon and the others one more time.
I can feel Tai trembling next to me and the anger he is feeling is accelerating my own heart beat too. It almost feels like electricity is running through my body. I give my hardest to focus on our way out of here and sigh in deep relief when the giant gates open up in front of us.
I let go of Tai and make sure that everyone leaves the temple. The gates close right after I stepped out and only a second later I hear a bone – crushing sound that sends shivers down my spine. I turn towards Tai who's glaring at the gates with hatred filled eyes. The skin on his knuckles ripped open because of the force with which he just hit the gate.
"Tai – ",
"Did you hear what they called me?!" He interrupts Gennai. He's controlled by deep anger what makes this whole situation only more dangerous for all of us. I take a step towards him and earn an angry glare while doing so.
"Trust me, I've been called worse. What they think should not bother you that much."
"Easy for you to say. They choose you to be the ruler over the dimensions. You literally stole Tai's job", Mimi counters, her arms crossed before her chest.
"W – What?!" – What the fuck?!
"Yeah you – ", Davis wants to add but gets interrupted.
"Guys! He's not the enemy", Tai says, his voice much calmer now and I can feel his heart beating steadily again. He shots me an apologetic glance before he takes a deep breath and faces his teammates again.
You sure change your moods fast...
"We should go back to the base. This place is messing with our heads...at least, with mine." With that he grabs me by my arm and pulls me with him to the front of the group, taking the lead. The other's eye their leader with confused glances. Matt is the first one who sets in motion, causing the rest of them to follow us. The blonde joins Tai's other side while Gabumon and Agumon walk in front of us.
I can sense that Gennai is not pleased at all, neither by the outcome of this meeting nor with any of our behavior. But much to my surprise he is staying silent. Davis and Ken are the only ones who are engulfed in a conversation with each other.
The farer we get away from the temple of Fanglomon the calmer I feel Tai getting. The mist appears again and the forest thickens, welcoming us back to our all too familiar, depressing surroundings. The sunlight is long gone and replaced by the heavy, grey clouds and I inwardly grab the handle of my dagger again.
"Guys... I might sense something", Mimi speaks up in a low voice. It is enough for every one of us to hear and to stop right in our tracks. Palmon eyes Mimi nervously before she lets her gaze wander over the thick bushes.
The mist is too dense and with the lack of any sunlight we're practically blind in here. I focus on my inner voice that is telling me that – yes – Mimi is right. Just when I come to that conclusion, I sense the attack already coming at us. And I am obviously not the only one.
"Guys! DOWN!" Tai calls out, throwing himself over his digimon partner.
"THUNDER BREATH!" The fire blows over my head, lighting up the whole area before it vanishes as suddenly as it appeared.
I jump up to my feet again, my dagger already in my hand. I stare into the darkness of the forest before I spot two all too familiar eyes staring back at me.
"Leviamon."
I hear the bushes rustle and an ice – cold gust of wind blows in my face before Leviamon reveals itself in all of its glory. I inwardly take a step back and gulp. I've forgotten how damn big his mouth was. His red skin shimmers in the darkness like blood. His blue spikes on his back look like flames coming out of his body. The perfect, damn long, row of his teeth makes me shudder and take another step back, causing me to bump into Tai who just stares at the demon lord in front of us.
"It's good to see you Alec." His voice reminds me of endless dark nights I thought I was living my best life... when in reality I was ruining it. Of all the demon lords, I considered Leviamon a true friend. We were always together whenever I went on a rampage. Never did he ever ditch me. When I needed to get away from somewhere fast, he was the first one who went after me. If the demon lords didn't share his opinions, I was always there to support him.
You could say we were best friends. Back then.
"Why couldn't you wait until the end? We might've even spared your life."
He opens his giant mouth, laughing out loud at me. His laugh nearly blasts my eardrum and the sight of his thousand teeth makes me shrink. I was never one of his opponents up to this day... and if I could choose, I'd rather not be. I sure as hell had my good reasons to be friends with him.
"Who said I would've spared yours? THUNDER BREATH!"
I feel the heat of the fire before I actually see it coming at me. I am too stunned to move. That's why I gasp in surprise when I feel someone pushing me down on the ground. The impact drives the air out of my damaged lungs, leaving me light headed on the ground. I register blonde hair and only a second later Matt grabs me by my arm and lifts me up to my feet again. Out of the corner of my eye I see several bright lights coming from the Digimon's attack's clashing against each other. The blonde presses his hand against my chest and I desperately pant for air, determined to get my lungs to work again. Whatever was destroyed back when I fought with Dylan, it must've been something that would accelerate my healing process, that much I know for sure now.
"Alec! Come on get a grip man. We don't need another one down!"
Another one?
He doesn't have to mention his name. My gaze flickers over to Tai's crouched down figure; he's trembling hard and his hands both grip his head. Gennai and Davis are both by his side, trying to get anything out of him. Agumon is standing right in front of his partner; his paws lay on Tai's knees but not even his Digimon partner seems like getting through him.
I don't have to make an effort to sense the change in his aura. Whereas before I could feel him holding onto his courage, I can literally see how it's slipping away from him, being replaced by something darker.
"DESPERADO BLASTER!" Paildramon's energy bullets fly over my head and connect with Leviamon's giant body. But it doesn't really look like they did any damage really.
"SHELL SHOCK!" Leviamon's giant jaws open and snap at Paildramon, missing him only by a few inches.
"METAL WOLF CLAW!" MetalGarurumon sends his ice – cold attack against the dragon, freezing him up completely.
What only lasts for about two seconds before the ice shatters and Leviamon glares angrily at all of us. Smoke is coming out of his nostrils and his blue spikes blaze dangerously.
I hurry over to Tai who didn't move an inch. As soon as Gennai spots me he straightens himself and grants me access to Tai's right side. I slowly knee down next to him and place a hand on his back. I can hear him mumble something under his breath but even if I ignore every other sound around me I can't make out anything of it. I look over to Agumon who is still clutching his partner's knees in his paws, worry all over his face.
I honestly don't know what we could do to help right now. The presence of a demon lord caused his state to worsen... that is a fact that doesn't really surprise me. But why –
My thoughts are interrupted by a woman – like Digimon who catches me completely off guard by falling on top of me. Rosemon immediately gets back on her feet, lifting me up while doing so.
"I'm sorry Alec!"
Damn what is it with me getting knocked over today?!
"Oh it's fine..." I trail off since she already flew off anyway. I nervously look over to Tai and chose to put that issue to the back of my mind right now. We will take care of that later... like we agreed back in the morning.
I grab the bow on my back and take an arrow out of the quiver; aiming it directly at Leviamon's left eye. Years of hard training have prepared me perfectly for this kind of situations.
Paildramon, MetalGarurumon and Rosemon all dance around him, sending several attacks at him which he either dodges or sends back at them. He's constantly moving what makes the whole thing in hitting his eye a whole lot harder. I let out a deep breath and narrow my eyes, bending the bow and sending the arrow flying at one of my oldest friends.
And miss him by a few inches.
Dammnit!
"FORBIDDEN TEMPTATION!" Million rose petals are sent towards Leviamon, destroying bits of data of his body. He screams out in pain and I register in surprise that there are several wounds on his body left from Rosemon's attack. I can't help but grin at the sight; who would've thought that roses could harm that big fat boy?
Rosemon for her part isn't done yet. Instead she spreads her arms and sends her next attack:" IVY HUG!"
Vines appear from the ground and tangle around Leviamon's long body, tying him down on the ground what gives the others enough time to gather enough energy to send their respective attacks towards him.
"GRACE CROSS FREEZER!"
"ELECTRIC BOLT!"
Paildramon's and MetalGarurumon's attack combine and hit Leviamon at full force, leaving him panting hard on the ground. Seeing the remains of Rosemon's vines causes an idea to pop up in my head and I look over to Mimi whose gaze is fixed on Tai who's still clutching his head in both of his hands.
We don't have time for this now...
"Mimi!" I hiss, hoping that I don't drive Leviamon's attention to me. She jerks before she turns around, shooting me a confused glance. I only gesture on the ground under Leviamon and that is enough for her to understand; her brown eyes start to shimmer in that familiar greenish light before she slowly rises her hands, causing massive roots to appear from the ground, wrapping themselves around Leviamon and leaving him complete immobile; a perfect target for me.
I don't waste another second and send the next arrow at him with the only difference that this time the arrow directly hits his left eye, causing him to scream out in pain one more time.
"WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE HUH?! – TAIL STRIKE!"
His long, split tail moves in high speed over the whole field, catching all of us off guard and sending us flying against the nearest trees. I hit my head on hard wood, causing my sight to blur for a moment before – once again – nausea kicks in. I feel the ground vibrating and force my eyes to focus on the scene right in front of me. Leviamon is trembling heavy because of the electro shocks he's receiving from Matt.
Paildramon and Rosemon look quite worn out already, what only leaves Matt and his partner.
And...
I take a deep breath and slowly get back on my feet, walking over Tai who's kneeling on the ground. His hand hangs low and Agumon is still right next to him.
"Please Tai, please let me digivolve!" The little dinosaur begs the brunette. Tai for his part violently shakes his head.
"No!"
"Tai please I – "
"I said no Agumon."
I come to a halt in front of them. Tai slowly lifts his head up and stares right into my eyes. I can clearly see the fear I saw before shimmer in his gaze. I know exactly why he is not letting Agumon digivolve. And I also know that there's not much time left before he loses every bit of self-control and turns into a bigger threat for us than Leviamon.
We have to end this here. Fast.
"Matt!" I call the blonde who is still standing straight, his hands raised, shielding us from whatever might come.
"What is it?" He looks over to me and obviously understands without asking too many questions. He just gives me a nod before he gestures for his partner to end this. As fast as possible.
"METAL WOLF SNOUT!" MetalGarurumon sends another attack against Leviamon but before his opponent can react and dodge Mimi is already pinning him down with her roots again.
MetalGarurumon's attack hits the dragon at full force again, but not causing any more damage. For what I can see there is not really much left in him, but he's fueled by anger. And anger can make you keep going... for a hell of a lot time.
"I'm not done yet... DESPERADO BLASTER!" Paildramon, although he doesn't really look like he can keep that up much longer, sends an attack against Leviamon who only grins at him. With one, swift, powerful move he frees himself from Mimi's roots and flies up in the air, dodging Paildramon's attack easily.
"DUO – TAIL – STRIKE!" His two tails come down like lighting, hitting Paildramon at full force and causing him to fly over the field, dedigivolving while doing so.
Damn...
"You snake! ROSE SPEAR!" Rosemon also flies up into the air, mobilizing her last strength and drives her rapier into Leviamon's undamaged eye, blinding him completely.
"You little bitch! Do you really think that could somehow stop me from killing all of you?! SHELL SHOCK!"
Although he doesn't see anything anymore, he snaps at Rosemon, and to our all shock, actually gets a hold on her. She screams out in pain as soon as Leviamon's teeth sink into her body, before she loses consciousness completely. He hauls of with his mouth before he throws her down on the ground right before Mimi's feet where she dedigivolves into Tanemon.
"So... where's the wolf at?" Leviamon looks around, obviously trying to get MetalGarurumon to move so he can hear him. But after glancing at MetalGarurumon who is giving his best to stay on his paws I don't dare to get my hopes up anymore –
"I'm your opponent now", a new, foreign but at the same time damn familiar voice sounds, sending ice – cold shivers down my spine. I hear the others gasp in shock. I don't really have to see BlackWargreymon to know that it is him. The digidestined's pale faces speak volumes.
"Tai... what – ?" Davis stammers, looking at his long – time mentor in pure shock.
Said mentor however only looks up to the pitched – black armored digimon who glares angrily at Leviamon. His expression does not give away anything he must be feeling right now.
"You hurt my friends. Now I'll hurt you: TERRA DESTROYER!" A giant, black energy ball forms in BlackWargreymon's hands before he sends it towards Leviamon who obviously doesn't see it coming. The attack sends him flying towards the nearest trees, similar to what he did with us only a moment ago.
BlackWargreymon for his part doesn't waste another second before he launches himself at him again:" BLACK TORNADO!"
"THUNDER BREATH!"
"Oh no... You don't", I hear Tai speak up before he takes several steps forward and with one swift motion of his hand he sends Leviamon's hellfire back to him again. BlackWargreymon's tornado combines with the fire, blowing hot wind against our faces and nearly burning up my eyes, but also Leviamon's whole core.
Tiny bits of data flow in the air and I am ready to build up the shield because of the spore attack that will surely follow. But as soon as I raise my hands, I feel Gennai grab my arms, lowering them again.
"Gennai what is it?"
"He's taking care of it", Matt answers for him, a sleeping Tsunomon in his hands. His gaze is blank and full of pain at the same time.
"Oh no Tai...", Mimi whispers next to me. I finally look over to the boy, whose arm is stretched out, absorbing every bit of Leviamon's last attack. I gulp before I take several steps forward, shielding the digidestined of whatever might come now.
When I'd be in his place, I'd die to have someone protect my loved ones from me.
As soon as every bit of the spores is gone he lowers his arm and stumbles back lightly before he lifts his head, smiling at me:" Guess we waited too long huh..."
"We'll get through this Tai", Matt says, handling Tsunomon over to Gennai before he slowly approaches his best friend.
Tai's expression turns from slightly derisive back to terrified. He raises his hands in defense and walks back:" Matt. Don't come near me, I don't know what I'll do."
"You won't do anything. I know that."
"Matt!" I call out for him, causing him to stop in his tracks and look back at me. I slowly shake my head, gesturing for him to come back.
"Alec, he needs our help", he hisses angrily.
Tai suddenly falls down on his knees again, wincing in pain and clutching his head.
"Matt!"
The blonde jerks by the mention of his name and crosses the last few meters that were separating him and Tai. He kneels down to Tai's level and places his hands on the brunette's shoulders.
"Tai come on get a grip man."
My mind is working in high speed. Several images from the past come back all at once and suddenly I am not looking at Tai and Matt anymore. Instead it's me and my brother. My brother who desperately tried to keep me. Who tried to hold onto my old self...tried to damp down the fire that was roaring inside of me, what only resulted in him getting terribly burnt.
Tai's painful cry snaps me out of my self-misery and I quickly turn around to the digidestined:" Listen guys... whatever we might do now. It is only for his best, okay?"
Mimi, Davis and Ken eye me nervously. While Ken and Mimi don't really look that confident, Davis looks back at Tai before he slowly starts to nod.
"Tai trusts you. That means I do too."
Ken and Mimi eye Davis with confused looks. Mimi's gaze jumps from Davis to the two boys farther away and back to Davis again. She grinds her teeth in frustration before she closes her eyes for an instant – almost looking like she's begging him for forgiveness – before she nods too:" If Tai trusts you... then I do too, of course."
"So do I", Ken says.
And I don't need more to act. I quickly approach Matt who is trying to hold onto Tai who as much as I see it, is long gone already. His greyish blue eyes are two stiff dots and I can feel the anger boiling deep inside of him. We have to stop him before he loses it completely.
"Matt, we have to knock him out."
"What?! What the fuck man? Why would I want to do that?"
"Look into his eyes. Do you see him? I mean... do you really see him?"
Matt eyes me with a confused glance before he slowly turns towards his best friend again. Tai is completely stiff whereas his eyes lost every glint they once had. Matt's hands are still on his shoulders while Tai is gripping the blonde's elbows with such a force, that I see his knuckles turn white. He stares into the brunette's eyes for a little while longer before I see his own eyes start to glister suspiciously.
He sniffles lightly:" Why did they take you away from me?"
I nervously eye Tai who remains silent. He didn't even twitch. His gaze is still as dull as before. He looks like a freaking statue. Damn.
"Matt", I urge him on but I already know that there is no way he could harm Tai right now.
"Please, come back to me Tai." He slowly shakes him by his shoulders and images of me doing the same with my brother flash before my inner eye, making me shudder once more.
Stop that. Tai is not dead for fuck's sake!
I take a deep breath and pray to god for forgiveness for my next move. I push Matt aside before my fist connects with Tai's chin, knocking him out immediately.
TAI'S POV
The last few hours are nothing but fuzzy images in my head. Everything happened in a blur. Every sound was kind of weird and I could not understand a thing that was said to me... or about me. I felt them holding me. I felt him begging me to come back to him. And I felt being bought down here.
But I didn't really feel it happening. Does that make sense? Probably not. But nothing really makes sense anymore anyway.
I don't trust myself anymore... and I know they do too. Otherwise I'd never be left down here, alone.
And they'd never took my partner away from me.
But they did.
Because I gave them a reason to.
The memory of being separated from him comes back painfully clear and I feel the anger take over again.
Fuck this. Fuck them! I don't need them. I don't need any of them!
The heat in my chest increases immediately as soon as the thought crosses my mind, daring to literally burn me up alive. I look down at my palms and realize only now that I was balling my hands into fists the whole time. Deep, red marks cover my hands but that would not disturb me so much if it weren't for the purple shimmering aura surrounding them.
The rustling of the door snaps me out of my daze and I lift my head up after what feels like hours. The moment I do so however I instantly regret it. Puffy, sad crimson eyes stare at me through the bars of the cell I am currently sitting in. She's wearing one of my hoodies and tights that make it painfully obvious that she got thinner since we came here. Her hair is a fiery mess and she's not wearing any make up.
She never needed that stuff anyway.
Her lower lip trembles lightly and she's clutching one of the bars harder than necessary. But I can see her shaking... if from anger or sadness I'm not really sure.
"It kills me seeing you in here" – ok, sadness it is.
I stare a while longer into her eyes before I slowly lower my head again. I can hear the voices clear in my head... screaming at me to hurt her. They want me to hurt her so bad. I silently bit on my lower lip to prevent me to say anything I might regret. Because if I open my mouth, I will regret every word I'll say.
I can't control myself, but she doesn't know that. None of them does... this is why they think I am doing what I do intentionally. But I don't... it's that damn drive that comes from the power of darkness.
"Tai", the longing in her voice drives me crazy. I can feel the power of courage trying to fight against that giant inside of me, but it takes the power of darkness exactly one wave to damp out every bit of positive energy I've felt inside of me. I can feel my body temperature sink even more and the darkness slowly fueling the anger inside of me.
HURT HER DAMN IT!
"Tai don't do this to me. I lo –"
It's too much. I can't keep my mouth shut anymore. It's like I am pushed back behind a curtain and someone else just took over my body.
"Do you?" I interrupt her without even wanting to.
Her eyes get wide immediately and I can clearly see her hurt expression. Something inside of me feels satisfied. But my heart cracks.
"Tai what – ",
"Do you really? Because by now, I am not so sure about that anymore", the words come out of my mouth before I even have the time to collect my thoughts. What on earth am I saying?!
She stumbles backwards as if I just slapped her right into her face: "B – Babe... how can you say something like that?"
Please Sor... just go. Go, otherwise this will end worse than it already is.
"Tai – ", she starts but somehow I regain control over myself again, just enough to tell her what I want from her.
"Leave Sor."
She shuts her mouth almost immediately and looks down at me with that freaking pained expression of hers. I am dying. I am literally dying... and deep down I'm sure as hell crying. But my face feels like stone, like a damn cold mask that won't fall, no matter how hard I pull on it.
"Y – You don't mean that", tears start to fall down her cheeks.
"But I do. I want you to go Sora. Now."
My tone is final and she gets it. Thank god... she gets it. More tears fall but instead of trying again to somehow reach out to me, she turns around and walks up the stairs again.
I'm left alone in the dungeon again... or so I thought.
"You didn't have to be that harsh to her! For fuck's sake Tai she loves you!"
Her voice – different from Sora's – wakes in me the deep desire to break something. Whereas before I could keep the anger inside of me at bay it breaks loose as soon as I feel her presence in here. I turn around and scowl angrily at the angel – like woman sitting across from me. Her brown hair is bound into a high ponytail and her emerald green eyes glare back at me with the same intensity as mine must glare at her.
"What do you want from me? You left, remember? You promised to be there and then you left the moment I set foot into the base again. So what on earth makes you think that I want you to be here now?" My voice drops several octaves and sounds more foreign to me than ever before.
Her eyes widen lightly and she shifts uncomfortably:" Tai listen –"
"No Nadia. You promised! And not even an hour later you left. Why. Are. You. Here.?"
She shakes her head slowly, obviously not believing what she's seeing... or hearing for that matter.
"I asked you a question."
"Honestly? I don't know", she slowly gets up on her feet and shrugs helplessly. She looks ridiculous...and it pisses me off. Her answer pisses me off...everything pisses me off!
"Then go."
"Tai I can't leave you alone in this state I – "
"LEAVE! I DON'T NEED YOU. I DON'T NEED ANY OF YOU!" She stumbles back and vanishes in front of my eyes, her horrified expression burning itself into my memory.
That's it. I just lost it. Completely.
"Uh oh... someone is a grumpy gills", his laugh echoes through the now completely empty dungeon and feels like razor blades on my drumhead.
"What the fuck is this? Party in Tai's cell?" I get up and walk over, leaning against the iron bars.
Alec eyes me with a mixture of amusement and deep worry. He has dark bags under his eyes and his hair looks messy, as if he was running his hands through them, like I do most of the time. He's dressed completely in black and I can see the fresh bandages on his chest shimmering through the thin fabric of his shirt.
"Well judged by your mood it is more like Tai's funeral, don't you think?" He says before he leans against the opposite wall.
"Alec... I don't need – "
" – Me to be here. I know. But I don't have to be needed, to be there, you know?"
He looks at me, the corner of his mouth slightly bent as if he is suppressing a grin. Although he went through a lot today he looks calmer than ever. And somehow his calmness starts to piss me off.
"How can you be like that Alec?" I knit my eyebrows, thinking about how he must be feeling after everything that has happened.
He slightly frowns at me but I see that he didn't quite understand my question.
"I mean... the first time I saw you I was deeply impressed. You even scared me a bit... but now? You're not more frightening than a kitten."
Why on earth am I purposely pissing him off?
He raises an eyebrow at me:" Why? Because I am not destroying everything I encounter?"
I lean forward so I can look him right into his eyes. Although the place here is poorly illuminated by a few lights I can see the anger shimmering in his eyes. It's the same as I am feeling. Although he received a new holy task and although he left his old ego behind... we still share the power of darkness together. That is where this certain anger is coming from.
We're angry. All the time.
"Alec, they killed everyone you cared about. Your fiancée, your whole team... even your kid!" I see him flinch by the sheer mention of his son.
"They killed your brother only 48 hours earlier and you're seriously still here?! Checking on me? Why on earth don't you seek revenge?!"
His gaze turns empty and his eyes resemble two ice cubes again... like every time when he tears up:" Tai... if you're seeking revenge, dig two graves – one for yourself."
Ugh.
"At least you can rest in peace knowing that you killed the murder of them. How could you forget that they killed your son?"
I'm taken aback by the force with which he hits the iron bars of my cell. The sound echoes through the whole room, nearly blasting my eardrum. I stumble backwards and stare at him, clearly surprised by his sudden outburst.
"How dare you impute that I forgot what he did?!"
He's right… I was thinking about all of them when in reality it all comes back at him. He caused Alec so much sorrow. He pulls the strings, although he is not the leader of them. He drove me away from the only one I really loved by giving me this power I vehemently tried to fight off. And failed. I failed so miserably...
The sudden urge to strangle someone overwhelms me. I want to kill.
No. I want to kill him. But I can't do it alone.
"If you didn't", I start, slowly approaching the bars again and lean against them, being only inches apart from Alec's face :" Then you and I should go and hunt that motherfucker down."
He takes a deep breath but stays silent. I can clearly see the inner fight between his rational, phoenix – like self and his old ego. The color of his eyes intensifying however is answer enough for me.
"Let's go then."
END OF CHAPTER 17
Again, I am very sorry that it took me too long.
What do you think of the events? Did you see anything coming? Did you like it? Hated it? I'd love to find out!
I'll try to speed up with the updates again but please forgive me if it'll take me another two months again.
Oh and if you'd like some updates on how the chapters are going or something just follow me on twitter Sor8.
THANKS.
