Every day had been a struggle, or so it felt for Remus. Since he'd woken up in the Hospital Wing (post-transformation) he had learnt of the events which had transpired during the evening of the full moon, his stomach knotted in helpless agony. Leila hadn't believed his lie one bit and worst of all, both Sirius and Marlene had agreed that she had suggested he was cheating on her with another girl. If only that had been his dirty secret. The whole night was a bloody disaster from how they told it, the girls had resorted to a memory charm to make Leila forget and Remus' secret was exposed to two friends in the process.
"I don't care." It was Lily, who visited first. Somehow, she arrived bright and early before Marlene had even come (Marlene was always first to see him after a transformation, early in the morning with tea and biscuits).
"You say that but it...it's a terrible...affliction. Something that makes me almost unsafe to be around." Remus was still vulnerable then, weak from his transformation, and in shock from what Lily had shared with him so far.
"I know what people think," Lily told him, leaning in, "but I'm not just anyone you know." She said it with a half-smile, her face full of warmth. All his life, Remus had been moved around and kept away from bonding with other children. Later, he'd come to hate himself too much to try and form real relationships. The boys - James, Sirius and Peter - had put a stop to that. They'd shown him that he could form true bonds.
"I know," Remus had confessed to her, " you're not like that."
Truthfully, Remus had always known Lily was different. There had never been any reason to doubt that she would accept him for who he was. Lily had never been anything but kind to him - even when she had hated James and Sirius. They'd formed a bond of their very own over the years, late nights spent together studying where secrets would inevitably begin to spill. Lily's empathy was predictable really, as she'd never been anything but, and her upbringing in the Muggle world allowed her an open-mindedness on the subject many who'd grown up in Remus' world did not have.
It was not Lily who truly shocked him but Alice. Alice had grown up in the Wizarding World, like Remus, and had been exposed to the stigma around werewolves. She knew all about the existing beliefs, perhaps she even knew people who shared them. Remus could never be sure. He'd only known her to be kind but once a person found out the truth it could change. That had happened before.
Alice arrived around lunchtime. She had tears in her big brown eyes, lips turned down. She was devastated - that Remus had not trusted her enough to tell her the truth even after the time they had begun to spend together. Alice had confided in him more than a few secrets - he was perhaps the only one aware of the full extent of her relationship with Everett Jenkins, whom Alice both detested and missed. All this honesty and Remus had not been able to confide his biggest truth of all...
"You must think quite low of me, to believe that I would ever judge you for such a thing." She sat next to his bed, in the chair which had been occupied by five others already that day. "I would never hold something you can't control against you."
"Oh, Alice…please don't take it personally."
"Of course I don't," she assured him. "I know how hard it can be. Not personally of course but I did some training with the Auror department. We learnt about the stigmas and barriers that prevent werewolves from moving freely through our society-"
"Really?" how had Remus never know this? "You should have said something."
"I wasn't aware that the information was so relevant," she reminded him. They laughed a little and Alice gave Remus's hand a nice long squeeze, a reminder that she wasn't going anywhere.
"Can you be honest with me?" Remus asked her then. "How bad was it? With Leila?"
Alice's face dropped. Remus could tell without a word that he wouldn't like her version of events any more than he'd enjoyed the others.
"I think that she's...well-intentioned." Alice chose her words carefully. "I just worry that unless you're prepared to trust her with the truth, you can't keep dragging her along. She seems too...fragile. I hate to use that word to describe her but it seems fitting somehow. Last night, after what she saw of Peter, she just seemed so…"
"Horrified?" It was how Marlene had described it.
"Frightened," Alice corrected him. That was almost worse.
How could he carry on like this? Lying? Pretending to be the gentleman when truly, he was a beast. The whole thing was despicable.
"You're a good guy, Remus. If you're asking me, I think she's lucky to have you but the question is, what do you want to do?"
Remus wanted a normal life. He liked Leila, perhaps he loved her, to be honest, he had never allowed himself to believe in such things for himself. With her, he could see a light at the end of the tunnel, something to keep him smiling each day and the truth was, he couldn't bear to confess his darkest truth to her. He would be forever changed in her eyes, ruined perhaps, and he couldn't bear it.
Alice was right, the choice was his, it was just the last choice Remus wanted to make.
One Week Later
Alice stayed in the library until closing hours, desperate to get as much work done as possible. It was a Friday evening and the next day would be the final Hogsmeade trip of 1977, a year Alice rather hoped to forget.
"Time to go," Madam Pince announced sternly. She hadn't come to herd students out until a quarter after eight, which was rare considering how strict she usually was. Alice made quick work tidying up the table she'd been sitting at, hidden five rows back in the stacks.
She had a thousand things on her mind - her final paper due in Charms, her anxiety about the Hogsmeade trip and most of all, her dread of returning home (whatever home was at this point, with the state of her family). It didn't help one bit when Alice hit the Library doors and realized that Frank was just a few feet ahead of her.
She wanted to turn around and hide but Madam Pince was ushering everyone out and it was already past closing hours. Alice had no choice but to follow the other students down the corridor, towards the main staircase. Frank paid little mind to those walking behind him until the group reached the main hall, some taking for the basement, others the dungeons and Ravenclaws made off in the direction of their tower on the first landing. Only then did Frank peer over his shoulder to see who the footsteps behind him belonged to. He was horrified, shocked, perhaps a little annoyed, Alice could never tell these days.
"Hi," she greeted him, rather awkwardly. "I wasn't following you, I swear."
"I know," Frank nodded, face void of any emotion. He's utterly indifferent, Alice thought painfully. Slowly, they both continued up towards the sixth floor landing, Alice keeping a distance of two steps behind him.
"Are you excited for the holidays?" Frank inquired near the fourth floor.
"Not really." Alice was glad she was a few feet behind him, so that Frank couldn't see the agony filled her face. "I suppose it is what it is, nothing can be changed at this point."
"How is your dad?"
The personal nature of the question shocked Alice. "He doesn't tell me, you know that."
Frank knew more than that. He knew better than anyone the impact her mother had on holidays. She'd decorated like a maniac, the whole house covered in tinsel. Once, she had even arranged a miniature Christmas tree in Alice's bedroom, much to her daughter's dismay. Frank had seen the Christmas Eve dinners and Christmas morning gift unwrappings. Once, the year before, he had even brought Augusta along to join them. Without his father, Christmases were pretty lonely in the Longbottom house as well and for that one morning, they had felt like a proper family.
"He just needs time," Frank suggested. He gave Alice a quick glance over his shoulder, a terse smile upon his lips.
"Maybe…" she agreed. He couldn't stand to look at her for more than a few seconds. As they reached the final landing - between the fifth and sixth floors - Alice paused.
"Frank," She stopped him. It took him a moment to properly look at her, his face in its blank mould once more. "I'm sorry, if I've ruined your life…" it was hard to hold back the tears which crept upon her as she said it.
"You haven't ruined my life Alice." His voice was so vacant, no love nor anger. Nothing. The void was gut-wrenching. "Really, I think that it'd be good if we just try to be...friendly, at the very least."
"Yes," Alice agreed. She would take whatever she could get.
"I still need space," he reminded her.
"I know," she assured him, "I can respect that."
Frank sighed, running a hand through his short brown hair. "I don't hate you, Alice," he told her. "In fact, there'll always be a place for you in my heart, even if you did break it." She couldn't help wincing at that. "I don't want to be strangers."
"Me neither."
Frank nodded and climbed the remaining steps up to the Fat Lady, Alice lagging behind. By the time she reached the landing, he had already disappeared into the portrait hole and the Fat Lady eyed her with a sympathetic frown.
"Chin up darling." The portrait swung open once Alice provided the password and stepped through the portrait hole alone, shoulders slumped.
Once, Lily had been filled with excitement at the thought of returning home for Christmas. Home during the holidays meant her father's off-key carolling, the smell of her mum's baking, and a feast for Christmas dinner. Her father would prepare the mashed potatoes every year, Lily's favourite, rich with garlic and butter. Since his death, the holiday had lacked a certain element of joy. The year prior, the first spent without her dad, Lily's relatives had descended upon their home, staying from Christmas Eve to New Year's Day. Lily could only pray this year was quieter.
Fat chance, with Petunia in wedding mode her sister was certain to be a total bridezilla. If the summer was any indication, Lily would spend most of her time out of the house and probably with James, who had made it very clear that she was welcome at the Potter's manor. At the very least, there was James' New Year's party to look forward to, which Lily had only attended once before.
When she had been dating Fabian last Christmas he had insisted she attend the party. Lily dreaded the event but James proved an extremely adequate host, and less of a menace than he had been in previous years. It was mad to think that one year later she would be attending the same party as James' girlfriend. He had planned a whole dinner their first week home at which she would meet his parents, his mother eager to lay eyes on the girl her boy had spent years talking about. They were big shoes to fill.
Luckily for Lily, it was another week before the holidays officially began and today was the final Hogsmeade trip, not to mention the first that James and Lily would spend together. Many firsts. The two of them were still caught up in the excitement of it all, the blissful joy which existed every time they were together and the heat they had for one another. Lily could barely go an evening without him and James was always doting. He'd cared for her since the abduction and somehow, in only a few weeks, made it feel as though she were safe again. There was no one else Lily would rather return to Hogsmeade with, for the first time since the abduction had taken place there.
Lily wore a warm yellow, tartan dress with thick straps and a black polo-neck beneath. She wore dark tights to protect her legs from the cold and a pair of black Chelsea boots. The dress had been a Christmas gift from her mother two years ago, a good purchase at Marks & Spencer's.
Someone rapped at her door as Lily gave herself a final look in the full-length mirror she kept in her room.
"Come in!"
"Is this outfit too much?" Marlene asked as she came trotting in, fiddling with the belt cinched around her waist. She wore a cream coloured cotton sweater tucked into a brown, button-down, corduroy skirt, which cut off an inch or two above the knee.
"Casual but chic," Lily nodded approvingly. It was hard for anything to appear too much on Marlene's figure. "It's for your date with Henry I suppose?"
"I'd rather we didn't call it a date." Marlene glanced herself over in Lily's mirror, the redhead stepping aside.
"It's going to be fine Mar, in fact, I think you'll be coming home with an extra pep in your step." Lily had not seen Marlene commit to any guy in at least a year. Lily worried that she guarded her heart too closely sometimes.
"I just…" she fiddled with her hair anxiously, running her fingers through the long strands of it. "I don't want to come off as some immature schoolgirl, I want him to find me genuinely interesting and yet I feel like I haven't an interesting thing to say about myself."
"You're too harsh on yourself," Lily sighed, settling on the end of the bed. "You're one of the smartest people I know. Everyone likes you. You're a universal taste." That got a laugh out of Marlene. "If Henry is not in love with you by the end of the day there's something wrong with him."
"I should hire you," Marlene smirked, "to hype me up."
"You couldn't afford my rate."
Marlene and Lily made for the Great Hall after that, to get breakfast before the carriages left.
"So is it official?" Lily whispered to Marlene as they made their way down the main staircase, steps in synch.
"Remus and Leila? Yeah. He's basically letting her believe that he's cheating on her."
Lily's stomach sank. "It's such a shame…"
She'd been worrying about Remus since the full moon when Lily and Alice had learnt the truth. Lily saw more clearly now the strain Remus' secret took on his body, his health, and most unfortunately, his relationships.
"I just hope he can live with that decision."
"I just hope she doesn't start snooping around, looking for answers that don't exist."
Remus' dilemma reminded Lily that some things were worse than a Christmas with Petunia - shocking as it was. She said a silent prayer for Remus, as she did most days now, and hoped for the best.
Sirius' mood was soured by nine a.m. when he saw Marlene McKinnon enter the Great Hall with Lily dressed for her date that afternoon. She looked beautiful, anyone would be forced to admit as much, and Sirius was well aware who she was trying to impress. James had been keen to repeat to everyone how wonderful it was to have Marlene find someone.
The Hogsmeade trip did not fill Sirius with its usual excitement. James would be off with Lily all afternoon, Marlene was on her date and Remus was still in the dumps, recovering from his breakup. He had informed the group yesterday that he had made plans for the afternoon with Alice, his new best friend. That left Sirius and Peter, a sad pair, sitting alone in their usual corner booth at Donovan's. The pub was empty, except for the two of them and a heavily bearded fellow sitting up at the bar.
"One pitcher of butterbeer," Don announced, setting the pitcher down on the table with a wink. He'd always been good like that, slipping the boys spiked drinks like an uncle at a family Christmas. Once, it had been all four boys sitting around the booth, their own private gang, but now there were only two. Sirius couldn't help but sulk.
"Since it's just the two of us," Peter went on chatting away, hardly noticing the shift in Sirius' mood. "What has Remus told you about the breakup?" Peter was always good for one thing: gossip.
"He told her that things were moving too fast for him and he needed a break, to...be alone." Sirius had done his best to mask his happiness when Remus announced it was over - Leila hadn't been his cup of tea - but his friend's melancholy state was dreadful. The worst bit being that Leila had no idea what the truth behind their split really was. Instead, Remus had gone along with her fear - that he might be sneaking about with someone else - so that she might really give up on him.
"It seems a waste, doesn't it?"
"We all knew it would happen sooner or later."
"One day though, he'll have to be honest. It hasn't worked out too badly so far?" Peter suggested optimistically.
"Except that Remus himself has never been honest with anyone about his situation. We confronted him about it."
"What about Marlene?"
"James practically put the words into his mouth."
"Still, I don't think it's good, to keep things like that inside. He needs to be honest, not only with her but himself."
"Quite the Guru you are, huh?" Sirius teased him.
"I just want to see him happy," Peter shrugged, sliding down the booth a little. "He seemed to really care for her…"
"Yes, well, it's easy to care for someone in the beginning," Sirius huffed, "before you know the details of another person, before you witness them at their worst."
"Have some experience you'd like to share?" Peter was always nosy.
"No," Sirius rolled his eyes, "I've witnessed enough tragedy to know I never wish to partake." That was a lie, he did wish, he just knew, against his wishes, that it could never be true. He could never be the guy on the date, the one Marlene put her best skirt on for, he could never truly explore what it was he felt for her, that magnetic pull that seemed so irresistible. Sirius would be the guy she told horror stories about in a few years, whose prior acquaintance she dreaded to reflect upon.
"Well, I wouldn't mind falling in love," Peter said. "It seems nice."
"You say that now…"
"Don't you think it would feel better having someone? Not always being so alone?"
The bell at the front door jingled and the entrance of James and Lily rescued Sirius from the conversation. Snow blew in with them as Lily pushed the door shut and James unravelled the red scarf around his neck.
"I nearly froze to death making that journey across the village," Lily announced when they made it to the booth, their cheeks rosy from the cold. Sirius poured them both glasses from their pitcher.
"This will warm you up," he promised Lily, watching her eyes widen in shock with her first sip.
"Now I understand why Donovan's is so popular with you lot."
"Has anyone seen Marlene?" James asked. "I wonder how her date is going."
"What about Remus?" Sirius attempted to change the subject. "Anyone spotted him and Alice?"
"They're only friends you know," Lily reminded him curtly. "They're both healing."
"And rebounding," Sirius added, much to Lily's dismay.
"I don't think Remus can think about anyone other than Leila right now," Lily told him, "as for Alice, I think if anything she'd want to patch up her relationship with Frank." Sirius disagreed but he didn't bother saying so, arguing with Lily was folly. Instead, he finished off the pitcher, refilling everyone's glasses, and flagged down Don for a second round.
It seemed Remus and Alice were the only two in the castle not enthused about the final Hogsmeade trip of the season. Remus had felt rubbish all week and the Saturday of the trip was no different. He had spent his time, since the previous Sunday, wallowing in self-pity and guilt, having pulled the plug on his relationship.
The decision had been made after his stay in the Hospital Wing post-transformation. How could he face his girlfriend and pretend everything was okay? Leila had literally needed her memory wiped because she was so distraught over his lies. It wasn't easy, but Remus knew it was the right decision, to call an end to things before anyone wound up more hurt than they needed to be. He simply told her that things were moving too fast. He couldn't handle it. The conversation had not gone smoothly.
"I don't understand," Leila had repeated. "Why're you doing this?" They'd been standing outside the entrance to the Hufflepuff basement. Remus had thought it best to be close to Leila's comfort zone, so she might run away from him when the whole thing was finished.
"You deserve someone better than me," Remus told her, head bowed shamefully. "I can't let things continue when I know that…"
"Have you done something?" Leila had inquired, voice thick with emotion. "Is there someone else?"
Remus wished the answer were that simple. He wished those were the problems which plagued his dreams at night.
"It's me," Remus had insisted, "I'm the problem."
"This makes no sense." He could see the fury in her hazel eyes. "Just a few days ago everything was fine." Her voice cracked on the final word.
"I'm sorry." What else could he offer? More lies? A poorly worded cover-up? Nothing would soothe the pain. Not for either of them. So, Remus had left it at that and abandoned his one chance at love, with a girl he had truly come to care deeply for…
That was why, both recently single and heartbroken, Remus and Alice had decided to spend the day together, wallowing in self-pity. It had been a good choice. Remus didn't find it as easy getting into the nitty-gritty of his feelings with the boys. Sirius was uncomfortable with too much emotion and James was rarely around these days anyway, wrapped up in his new relationship with Lily. None of them would be able to understand his heartbreak, not the same way Alice seemed to - going through one of her own.
"I can't help feeling angry when people suggest to me I'll get over this like any other break up," she complained to him, "Frank wasn't just any boyfriend. He was the guy I wanted to spend the rest of my life with…" There was lots of pity to go around between the two of them.
Once in Hogsmeade, they had hit HoneyDukes first, loading up on their favourite candies, and then made for an isolated park Remus passed frequently on the way to Donovan's. Hogwarts students rarely visited it as it lay beyond the shops and restaurants. There was a children's play structure, with a sizely tube which served as a tunnel from one half of the structure to the other - where a slide lay. Inside of it, Alice and Remus found a hidden pocket of warmth and began sharing their candy as they chatted away.
"What's it like?" Alice asked him halfway through a bag of jelly slugs. "When you have a transformation?"
"Awful," Remus answered honestly. "The days before it happens are filled with dreadful anticipation. Then, when it happens...well at first it's rather strange and painful. Then I lose everything. Faint patches will come back, like a dream you can only remember in bits and pieces. The worst is when you can only remember a feeling - fear or even anger - those are the nights you know something terrible has happened."
"You've been managing that since you were five?"
"I had no choice." Remus could hardly remember what it had been like as a "regular" little boy. How it felt to live in a body one didn't resent and to not fear the repetition of the moon cycle.
"Still, the fact that you're here today, it's very brave Remus. You might not realize it but you're paving the way for another child, down the road, who might be facing a similar challenge."
Truth be told, Remus had never so much as considered that. He hated his werewolf form and never thought very kindly of those who shared his trait. It was a fellow werewolf who had vengefully turned Remus as a child and, if the whispers were true, Fenrir Greyback was also a strong supporter of Voldemort's cause.
It's kind of you to have reacted so…"
"Respectfully?" Alice offered. "I don't agree with all the stigma around magical creatures. I think it's wrong and its part of what allows Voldemort and his lot of goonies to carry on as they do." Remus laughed. He'd known Alice seven years and yet, only in the past few weeks had he learnt what an invaluable friend she was to have.
"You know,"Alice began, "there's no reason to believe Leila wouldn't react the same as me and Lily…"
"I couldn't…" just the thought made Remus' heart race with anxiety. "It would ruin the way she looked at me."
"Could it be any worse than being broken up?"
"Yes," Remus insisted, "she could tell someone." It was his worst fear. Not only would it destroy his chance at a life after Hogwarts, but he would also be betraying Dumbledore - who had created a safe environment at the school, one that allowed for Remus to grow up free of stigma.
Alice quit the subject, suggesting instead that they crack open their bag of pink coconut ice, her favourite. They stayed there for a while longer, huddled together, and eventually agreed it was time to find a warm building to sit inside, perhaps with a cup of cider.
"Come on, we'll go to Don's. No one ever goes there."
"Anywhere warm," Alice had agreed, pink from the cold. They moved quickly towards the main road, Remus pausing to offer Alice his gloves as she ran her red hands together in an attempt to warm them.
"Bless you."
The moment was tender, and entirely platonic, the blooming affection of a close friendship formed through shared heartbreak. The moment should have been heartwarming but instead, they were interrupted by a group of girls. Three girls, one of whom Remus recognized as Leila, hidden beneath a thick fur hood.
"I knew it," Leila seethed, her friends whispering to one another. "I knew you were sneaking about with her!" Leila pointed accusingly at Alice.
"Me?" Alice was shocked.
"Leila - you've got the wrong idea," Remus began to protest.
"Oi, mate, you got no right telling her what kind of ideas to have after you broke her heart," one of the girls, with pink hair in pigtails, snapped at him.
"You've been screwing each other! It's why you and Frank broke up, isn't it?" Leila demanded, arms crossed.
"No-"
"You told me that she cheated on Frank, didn't you Remus?" Leila's eyes narrowed in on him.
"I told you that in confidence-"
"To turn me off your scent!" she bellowed furiously.
"Leila, I swear to you, Remus and I are nothing close to that-"
"Forgive me if I don't take the word of a lying whore." Leila's words were acid, even Remus was shocked by the cruelty of them.
"That was unnecessary," he stepped in, Alice gone pale as snow.
"What's going on here?"
In the heat of the confrontation, no one had noticed the two people walking down the road towards them - Mary and Emmeline. It was Mary who had stepped forth, looking suspiciously from the gang of girls to Remus and Alice - who both looked rather shocked.
"Nothing," Leila spat with fury, "absolutely nothing."
"Your friends over there are lying cows is what's happening," the pink-haired girl snapped.
"Oi!" Emmeline jumped in.
"Come on," the third girl - who was wearing a red, wool hat, said to the others, "let's get out of here. They're not worth it." The other two conceded, Leila passing Remus and Alice a final glare before stomping off with her friends.
"Alice…" Remus began, not quite sure where to begin. He felt terribly responsible for it all.
"She's going to tell everyone," Alice said, horror in her eyes, "isn't she?"
"Tell everyone what?" Mary asked, coming to Alice's side.
"That I'm a dirty, cheating whore." Alice broke into tears, falling into Mary's arms. Remus just stood there, helpless, entirely responsible for the pain that had been caused.
"What on earth happened?" Emmeline demanded, violet eyes turning to Remus.
"I told Leila why Alice and Frank broke up while we were still dating," Remus explained, "now...she thinks it was me Alice was cheating with."
"Merlin," Emmeline put a hand to her head in pain.
"We don't know for sure she'll say anything," Mary was comforting Alice, whispering in her ear.
Remus prayed she was right. He was the one who had created this whole storm and suddenly Alice had been dragged into it, just as she was getting her feet back on the ground. It seemed cruel. Was heartbreak not enough?
Marlene had worried that she and Henry were going to end up at one of the typical date spots Hogsmeade had to offer, where her fellow students would be ready to stare and whisper about Marlene's mystery man. With that in mind, she had taken one of the first carriages down to the village and arrived at Donovan's before the pub had even opened, Henry unlocking the front door for her.
He looked handsome - as usual - an untucked blue button-down over faded black jeans, frayed at the ankles. His hair was unstyled and floppy, tufts of it slipping in front of his green eyes, just tempting Marlene to reach out and smooth them away. She hadn't known how to greet him, standing there awkwardly on the front step, unsure whether to lean in for a hug, or a kiss on the cheek. He moved first.
"It's good to see you again." His arms opened and Marlene stepped into them. "You're freezing!"
"It's a bloody long walk," she reminded him, stepping inside.
"I know," he smiled, "I've made it a few times myself. This way." Henry motioned for her to follow him behind the bar.
"The only bit of this place I've never explored." Henry led her through a small back kitchen and to the very back where an enclosed staircase lay. Marlene realized then where it was they were headed.
"I thought you might like to spend the day away from the crowds," Henry explained.
"Yeah," Marlene was eager not to have to deal with school gossip. "That would be really lovely."
"The apartment is much nicer than the entrance I can assure you," Henry chuckled, perhaps noticing Marlene's apprehension when looking up at the staircase. The steps were dark wood and worn.
"Don lets you live here for free I presume?"
"Oh yes, he's a kind fellow."
Henry motioned for Marlene to take the lead and she climbed each one of the creaky steps up to the front door.
"It's unlocked," Henry informed her.
Marlene pushed the door open, stepping into Henry's bachelor. It was much nicer than she had expected. Just one room, though it had the advantage of natural light with three large windows along the right wall from the entrance and quite the view of the village. Henry had a small kitchenette in the back corner and a stovetop with a kettle on it. His bed was positioned in the corner across from the kitchenette - tucked away. Along the wall facing the door was a fireplace, with a white mantle filled with picture frames. Marlene approached it immediately, curiosity getting the better of her.
She knew little to nothing of Henry's family. Come to think of it, anything she really knew about Henry she'd learnt in the past month or overheard her sister saying. In the photo Marlene looked at first she found three women arranged, all standing together as they grinned and giggled, their hair up in pin curls.
"Who are they?" Marlene asked. Henry came up from behind, peering over her shoulder.
"My mother and her sisters," he informed her. "It was taken just after the muggles' second war ended. My mum's sister, Shireen, served as a nurse." Marlene looked back at Henry, who smiled fondly at the photograph. "It was very controversial, for a witch from a well-respected family to get involved in muggle affairs."
They both turned to the next frame, in which Marlene recognized Henry right away - just as he had looked when she'd known him. His hair had been shorter, and always styled sharply. He'd been lankier then too, less manly.
"What are their names?" Marlene asked, pointing out the two she assumed to be his parents.
"My mum's Jecca and my dad is Tom. The little twerp next to me is Joni, my little sister."
"She's adorable." The girl beside Henry in the photograph had rosy cheeks and blonde pigtails.
"She's older now - she's at Hogwarts actually."
"Really?"
"Third-year Ravenclaw."
"I've probably seen her in the corridors without knowing it." Marlene made a note to keep an eye out.
The other photos were of Henry with mates and one with him and Joni alone - her riding on his back with a big grin, front teeth missing.
"Cuppa?" Henry asked once they'd looked at all the photos.
"That'd be lovely," Marlene nodded.
As Henry fixed the tea, Marlene drifted towards his turntable. It sat on a wicker table in a corner near the windows. Beside it lay a black milk crate full of vinyl. Marlene browsed expecting the usual male collection - lots of Dylan, Lennon, and some Leonard Cohen if she were lucky. Marlene was shocked when, a few records deep, she found Henry's collection of Joni Mitchell albums.
Marlene pulled Blue from the stack and put it on, flipped to side two. It had been the first album she had ever purchased for herself, age eleven. Her own copy was so scratched up on the second side that she could barely play it anymore - loved to death. The opening of California began and Henry turned around, grinning.
"I love this album."
"Big Joni Mitchell fan I see?" Marlene couldn't help but be impressed.
"The biggest."
"I think I might have you beat there," Marlene warned him, the kettle ringing out to interrupt. As Henry busied himself making tea, Marlene settled into one of the two chairs tucked in at the small wooden table in the centre of the room.
"How long have you been living here?"
"Since July." Henry was always quick when the questions got too close to his work.
"And in-between being a bartender you find time to chase down Death Eaters?"
Henry froze, his back, turned to her as he poured milk into the mugs. "Something like that."
"So...are you an Auror?" Marlene continued to press.
"Not quite."
"Are you training to become an Auror?"
"No," Henry told her, approaching the table gingerly, so as not to spill the tea. "My work is separate from the Auror Department. It's also much more dangerous." He set down a mug with a picture of Santa Claus waving on it in front of Marlene. "There are lives at stake and people I need to protect."
"Sounds like fun," Marlene teased - though she was only half-joking. She knew that whatever work Henry was doing, it involved trying to take down Voldemort's army and she wanted in, especially after what she'd experienced with the abduction. "I'd join if you'd let me," she went on, Henry smirking.
"Give it six months," he winked.
"Does that both you?" Marlene asked him, moving on. "My age?"
"Not if my age doesn't bother you," he countered.
"It doesn't bother me. It intimidates me perhaps."
"Don't let it. I'm a very simple guy."
"You don't appear simple at all." Marlene didn't know whether that left cause to run for the hills, but she couldn't help it, Henry was enticing. An old childhood crush, back to sweep her off her feet at the exact moment she needed it.
"What about you?" Henry inquired, leaning in towards Marlene, his green eyes twinkling. "Are you complicated?"
"Just a simple lass," Marlene assured him, though that was far from the truth.
"What about you and James?" Henry pressed. "I always thought you two were maybe…"
"No!" Marlene insisted. It had never been like that between she and James. "We aren't anything like that," Marlene told him plainly, "though we can be...complicated."
"Meaning?"
"Family is complicated, isn't it? That's what James is to me. I've known him for as long as I've been alive and so in a way, he's become a part of me. An extension of my own existence. Am I blabbing?"
"No." Henry didn't look bored in the slightest, his lips turned up. For a moment it seemed as though they would kiss but Marlene pulled away, the truth catching up with her.
"There is something though," she went on, "something you should know." Something that might make me too complicated in your eyes. "Sirius Black and I…well, we have had a bit of a history."
"Mmm."
"It's over now," Marlene swore, "but it went on for a little over a year. All in secret, no one else knows. Not except for my little brother," Marlene chuckled to herself.
"Why'd you keep it a secret?"
"I suppose neither of us was quite prepared to commit to anything serious and we didn't want all the expectations and questions that would arise if we did make it known. Then, also, there would be James…"
"Who's complicated?" Henry clarified.
"Yes," Marlene nodded, cheeks going red. "Is it all a bit too much for you?"
"No, it all sounds quite...manageable. That's the thing about my work, it makes every other problem in life very easy to solve."
"Shall I throw you another curve ball then?" Marlene asked, spirits rising.
"Go for it."
"How would you feel about being my date to James' New Year's party?"
"At the Potter's manor?" Marlene nodded. "Will Alec and Caroline be there?"
"Yes, but they usually stay up stairs with Mimsy, their house-elf."
"As long as it isn't too odd, my appearance at a party full of teenagers."
"It's not all teenagers," Marlene rolled her eyes, "Lots of graduates attend."
"Really?"
"Oh yeah. James is fucking loaded," Marlene assured him, "it's always one hell of party."
Marlene could feel herself falling, again, for Henry Fawley and his big, stupid, dreamy eyes. She leaned forward, reaching out one long arm and swept a strand of brown hair from his eyes.
"That's better," she smiled approvingly.
"May I kiss you?" Henry asked politely. He was a gentleman, more so than any guy Marlene had known before. She nodded and, as their lips met, her stomach filled with butterflies, hopeful for the new future developing ahead of her.
