Evie was sitting on the windowsill, blowing smoke out into the stiff, afternoon air. It was mid-July and she was spending the day in her brother's apartment. Edith Piaf was playing from the turntable across the room, Evie's favourite album, and Franny, her niece, was in the corner, enchanted by the dollhouse her aunt had recently gifted her with.
"Evie!" Her brother scolded her when he entered the room. "No smoking around zee baby!"
"I'm blowing it out the window," Evie shrugged, speaking in French rather than the broken English her brother tried to force her to use. While he had adapted to the language quite easily, Evie had always struggled with it. At twenty-five, she'd given up on trying.
"Dada!" Franny cried from the corner, her voice distinctly English. "Look!" she pointed excitedly at the arrangement of her dollhouse, proud as punch of the little home she'd built.
"It eez beautiful," Alex smiled, planting a kiss on the top of his daughter's head. Evie tossed her cigarette out the window to avoid any further scolding and returned to the couch where her brother sat, a glass of red wine waiting for her. Alex had planned to return home with his wife, Amy, as well, but, as it turned out, Amy was pregnant with the couple's second child and had been too sick to make the journey.
"So, is it official then?" Evie asked, continuing to speak French knowing how much it irritated Alex. He was desperate to perfect his use of the language, especially now that he lived in England. "Your children will be raised English snobs?"
"Oh please," Alex rolled his eyes. "If anyone's a snob it's you." Evie couldn't argue with that. "Besides, they'll have their auntie around to remind them of their roots."
"You and Amy aren't planning to get rid of this place are you?"
"No," Alex assured her, "we'll always have a home in France."
"Good, somewhere for the kids to spend their summers when they're old enough to travel alone."
"Somewhere for you to spoil them you mean."
"Why not?" Evie shrugged, grinning. "Is that not what aunties are for?"
Their conversation was cut short by a knock at the door. "Must be mama," Evie assumed, although she'd never known her mother to knock. "She said she'd be over soon with dinner."
Evie stretched out her long legs and skipped down the hall to answer the door, ready to greet her mother with a kiss on the cheek. She wondered what she'd say about her recently dyed hair, now a soft shade of lavender. She anticipated the horrified expression as she swung the front door open, a cheeky smile on her face.
It wasn't her mother she found waiting at the front door though. It was a man with floppy brown hair and heavy eyes. He gazed up at her in shock, clearly expecting Alex to answer the door, and shoved his hands into his pockets anxiously.
"Hello?" Evie greeted him in French. "Can I help you?" The look on his face made it clear he wasn't native to the country.
"Alex!" Evie cried over her shoulder, her eyes remaining on the stranger all the while. "Someone is here for you!" Her brother was standing behind her within seconds. He wore an expression equal to Evie's and she could see he did not recognize their guest either.
"Alex? I…Um…I'm Remus Lupin," the man stuck out his hand. "We've met a few times but I don't think we've ever been formally introduced—"
"Marlene's friend?" Alex clarified.
"Yes," the man nodded, his head bowed. Something about his manner made Evie nervous. She could see immediately this was no friendly visit. The man had arrived with news, bad news Evie was sure. They sat together in the living room, Evie gripping her glass of wine as she listened closely. She could understand English much better than she could speak it.
"James wanted to be the one to come," Remus explained, his hands clasped in his lap. "He couldn't of course, for obvious reasons…"
"What's happened?" Alex could sense the danger now too. Evie could see the fear in her big brother's eyes. Perhaps Franny could sense it too as she began to fuss, rushing into her auntie's arms.
"There was…" Remus cleared his throat, killing the time before he had to come out with the truth. "There was an accident."
"An accident?"
"Well…an attack…" Evie watched as her brother grew tense, his shoulders rising, his hands curling into fists. When Remus gazed across the couch at Alex, Evie could see the tears glistening in his eyes. "I'm so sorry," he said, his voice trembling. "I'm…" he choked on his words, his hand coming to guard his face as he cracked. "A group of Death Eaters went after the McKinnon family…" Evie couldn't help but gasp, her own hand flying over her mouth. "They were murdered last night."
Alex didn't move. He sat there, frozen, staring at Remus as though expecting more. She realized, with dread, that her brother would not understand until it was stated quite bluntly that his wife was dead.
"Amy?" Alex asked hopefully. "Did Amy survive? Is she okay? Can I see her-" he was on his feet, ready to grab his jacket and rush to his beloved's side. Evie clutched Franny closer to her chest, turning her head away so that she didn't see what came next.
"I'm sorry," Remus shook his head, not looking Alex in the eye. "There were no survivors."
"No, she…she can't," Alex shook his head in denial. "I received a letter from her just yesterday, she was fine—"
"It was late in the evening," Remus informed him. "No one could've known…"
"You must be mistaken," Alex was insistent. "Amy can't be dead. It isn't possible I…I would know if my wife was dead. I think I would know if my own wife was dead!" He was pacing the room, fingers tugging at the ends of his hair. Franny fussed in her auntie's arms, watching as her father began to lose control. Nothing will ever be the same for you, little one...
"Evie?" Alex paused, looking at his little sister with desperate eyes. "It can't be true?" his voice was shaking. "Please don't let it be true…" his chin began to wobble and suddenly he was sobbing. He fell to his knees, hands cupping his face. Evie thought she might be sick.
"Dada!" Franny shrieked, crying with her father now, "Dada!"
In between his sobs, Evie could hear as Alex whispered, "Amy," over and over, as if saying it might bring her back. With tears rolling down her cheeks Evie picked her niece up and carried her away. Franny had no clue that her entire life would be changed forever. She would never remember the kind mother who had loved her so well.
"Mama," Franny whimpered, burying her face in her aunt's chest. "I want Mama!" Evie felt as though her heart would break.
"There's no Mama mon amour," Evie choked. "Not anymore…"
Marlene was drunk, drunker than she had been in a long time, and the happiest she'd felt in months. The strap of her red dress slipped off her shoulder as Sirius twirled her around, catching her in his arms. They were at a club in Paris, disco music pulsing through the building, making everything vibrate. Sirius turned towards the bar and began to order their third round of shots. It was the first time they'd acted their age in months.
Paris had been a spur of the moment decision. Both Sirius and her family recognized how withdrawn Marlene had become in the months since Dorcas' death and everyone had agreed a trip was long overdue. Marlene hadn't argued. She'd gladly packed her bags when Sirius had announced the plan and had been thrilled to spend a weekend hidden away in Amy and Alex's apartment. Paris had always been her favourite city.
"Cheers," Sirius said as the bartender slid two shots of tequila towards them, "to being young and reckless."
"Cheers." Marlene was so drunk that she barely tasted the alcohol, wiping her hand across her face before drawing Sirius back onto the dance floor. They spent another hour there, dancing, with the occasional smoke break in between.
They only left when it became entirely clear they couldn't keep their hands off of each other. The alcohol made Marlene feel light as she went running through the streets of Paris, hand in hand with Sirius, taking breaks along the way to make out against closed up storefronts.
They didn't even bother to turn on the lights when they returned to the apartment. They began on the couch, moved to the bed, and by the end of it, they were fucking right against the bedroom window, not caring who saw. They lay on the bed now, naked, Marlene drawn into Sirius' side. Both catching their breath.
"What're you thinking?" Sirius asked. Marlene had been dozing off, her eyes closed. When she opened them she found Sirius watching her, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.
"That this is exactly where I'm meant to be," she replied, drawing his hand to her lips for a kiss. He didn't look as enamoured by the comment as Marlene had expected.
"What?" She asked, rubbing her thumb along the inside of his palm to catch his attention.
"Nothing I just…" his eyes fell, "I was remembering something my mother said to me once." Uh-oh. Marlene knew that nothing from the mouth of Walburga Black could be any good.
"Out with it."
"Oh just the usual," Sirius sighed, rolling onto his back, "just that I was a vile, ungrateful boy," it was the milder of his mother's comments, "and that no one would ever be able to love someone like me." Marlene couldn't imagine hearing that from her own mother, the person meant to love you most in the world. "I told her I didn't care, as long as I didn't spend another day in that house."
"Then came you," Sirius added after a short pause.
"I hate to break it to you but I was around long before then." Marlene could still remember being furious with James for befriending a Black and then realizing, rather quickly, he was nothing like the family she had been warned about.
"I know," Sirius agreed, gathering her in his arms. They were facing one another now, noses nearly touching, an intimate posture that had become so familiar to them, two people who had once sneered at the sight of one another.
"I love you," Sirius whispered.
"Say it again."
"I love you," he took her face into his hands and pressed his lips against hers. She never wanted to leave. Home no longer felt so safe. Their friends were dropping like flies, they came closer and closer to a Death Eater victory every day...
"Let's stay here," Marlene blurted out.
"What?"
"What if we just didn't go back? What if we just…what if we stayed here…" Why had she never thought of it before? Getting away from it all? It wasn't as though they'd never return, not as if they wouldn't make frequent visits back home to see friends, but why stay? Their group was fractured and Marlene doubted even James and Lily would be tempted to remain in Godric's Hollow once the war was over. There was nothing left for them there…
"What about your family? What about James?" Sirius asked as though she'd gone mad.
"We have magic don't we?" Marlene ran her finger along the side of his arm, picturing it. They could find an apartment of their own, bigger and better than the current bachelor pad they lived in. Marlene had done it before, uprooted her whole life, and this time she'd have Sirius by her side.
"Our whole life is in England." Sirius pulled away, pushing himself up into a seated position. "My whole life is in England." Ouch. Marlene looked away, hiding her disappointment. "I didn't mean it like that." Sirius sighed. "Is that really what you want? To run away from it all?"
Was it? Or was Marlene simply using it as an excuse to run away from all her problems? The woman she'd killed, the friends who no longer looked her in the eye. A fresh start would be so easy compared to facing the music.
"No," she was overcome with disappointment but Sirius was right, they couldn't leave. They couldn't abandon their friends, especially not James and Lily when they needed them most. Marlene had promised Caroline on her deathbed that she would never leave James again.
"Marls? If there's something…you can tell me if something is on your mind." She looked towards him, a lump growing in the back of her throat. Could she tell him? Could she admit that for weeks she had been lying to him, sneaking out of their bed at the crack of dawn to track Severus Snape's movements? They'd promised each other no more secrets and this, Marlene knew, would sting.
"Sirius I—" Could she?
Luckily for her, the confession was cut short. What first appeared to be a blue orb moving towards them from across the room revealed itself as a hummingbird. Alice's Patronus.
"There's an emergency." The hummingbird opened its mouth and out came Alice's voice. "You must return home immediately."
"You've got to be fucking kidding me," Sirius cursed under his breath.
"Moody needs you to be at the safe house by dawn." The hummingbird danced around a little more and then disappeared, falling apart like mist. Neither Sirius nor Marlene spoke. They sat there in silence, neither wanting to move for they knew after that they'd be forced to pop their serene bubble.
"We should go," Marlene finally managed. "We should go now." She rose off the bed, blanket wrapped around her bare shoulders.
"We don't have to leave yet," Sirius protested. She was already rummaging through her suitcase, throwing on clothes.
"It'll only be harder if we wait."
It was the warmest day of the year and James and Lily had decided to make what, under their circumstances, qualified as a family outing. They'd packed up Harry's pram and made the trip five doors down to Bathilda Bagshot's cosy home. She had a garden much larger than the Potter's and she enjoyed occupying Harry's attention with children's toys she seemed to have a closet full of (although Lily had never heard any mention of Bathilda having children of her own?)
On this particular afternoon, Bathilda had put her sprinklers on and Harry was able, for the first time, to make use of his swimming trunks. James held him, running through the sprinklers as Harry giggled endlessly. He always loved playing with his Dada.
"More!" Harry clapped his hands together and demanded every time James tried to take a break. Lily watched the two of them from a few feet away, stretched out on one of Bathilda's lawn chairs. At one point, when James attempted to stop and hand Harry off to his mother, the little boy fussed and, before either of his parents knew what was happening, the garden hose came loose, spraying James right in the face.
"Stop laughing!" he complained as Lily chuckled helplessly. "Just wait till he uses magic to get his way with you."
James sat on the end of Lily's chair, grumpy and soaking wet.
"Should we put Dada out of his misery?" Lily asked, kissing Harry on the cheek. She couldn't help but feel a little pride in the first signs of her son's power. She pulled her wand from her back pocket and pointed it at James, drying him off.
"What have I missed?" Bathilda stepped out the back door with a tray of lemonade and biscuits.
"Harry just used magic for the first time."
"Really?" she gasped. "What a clever boy!"
"Yeah, he's clever alright." James was still rather unimpressed with their son's first display of talent.
"Oh, soon you'll miss the days when it was just a little soft magic." Bathilda sat on the lawn chair across from them, levitating a glass of lemonade towards herself. "I remember when my nephew Felix's son used magic for the first time. He sent me a howler! Too excited to even write it out himself. Quite a thrill that gave me." She smiled nostalgically.
"Is that your nephew on the mantle?" Lily had been curious about the photograph since she'd first noticed it, sitting there on Bathilda's mantleplace gathering dust.
"Felix?" Bathilda shook her head. "No, that's his son Gellert. A handsome young man, wasn't he? Just fifteen in that photograph." Bathilda stared off into the distance, her eyes falling. "I always had a soft spot for Gellert…"
"He was a friend of Dumbledore's wasn't he?" James asked.
"Yes," Bathilda smiled fondly. "I introduced them you know?"
"Were they close?" Lily pressed. "Gellert and Dumbledore?"
"Inseparable," Bathilda nodded. "You hardly ever saw one without the other. Of course, after Arianna passed away everything changed. Albus was never quite the same..."
"Ariana?" Lily didn't recognize the name at all.
"The youngest of the three children," Bathilda explained. "Albus, Aberforth, and Ariana. She was always a fragile little thing though…" Lily found it difficult to imagine Dumbledore as anything but the old, Headmaster of Hogwarts. She couldn't picture him sitting around the table for a family meal or fighting with his younger brother over who got to play with a favourite toy.
They moved on after that, Bathilda's concentration waning, although Lily could've gone on hearing tales of Albus Dumbledore's youth for hours.
James and Lily returned home to their cottage after dark, a sleepy Harry tucked away in his pram. Bathilda had made them a lovely roast for dinner and made sure to serve it with Lily's favourite bottle of red wine. It was always a treat, being able to enjoy someone else's cooking for the night.
"What do you think Dumbledore would say if he knew the stories Bathilda told us about him?" James and Lily were sitting on the couch together, reading. She had her legs in James' lap, her head rested against the arm of the couch.
"I'm sure he wouldn't like it, particularly the stories about Grindelwald," James replied, hardly looking up from the page he was reading.
"Grindelwald?"
James looked at Lily as though she were mad. "Bathilda's great-nephew?" He reminded her. "Gellert? The one she was just speaking about." Lily still couldn't understand how James had known Bathilda's great-nephew's last name. What was she missing?
"What?" Lily demanded as her husband continued to stare at her as though she were a complete lunatic.
"You really don't know who he is?"
"Should I?"
James closed his book, sliding it onto the coffee table. "Never thought I'd see the day Lily Evans needed me to explain something that was in the history books," James said smugly.
"Well, are you going to explain it to me or not?" Now he was just getting on her nerves. Lily sat up, drawing her knees into her chest.
"He tried to organize a rebellion that would see an end to the International Statute of Wizarding Secrecy. It was quite the scandal at the time, people were terrified it would be the end of the Wizarding world." Lily recognized the story, something Professor Binns had probably rambled on about in one of the History of Magic classes Lily had napped through.
"So he wanted to blend the two worlds, wizard and muggle?"
"In a sense. What he really wanted though, was to force muggles into obscurity. He wanted a world in which Wizards held all the power." Lily imagined the world she had grown up in, the one in which magic did not aid day to day tasks and magical beasts belonged only in fairytales, squandered. It would mean the destruction of so much...countless lives ruined. She shuddered at the thought.
"He was power hungry. He wanted more, more than a world in which muggles and wizards exist in harmony. He wanted to control everything. Mum always said she thought Voldemort got some of his inspiration from Grindelwald."
"And Dumbledore was friends with this guy?" Lily gawked.
"So Bathilda says," James shrugged. "How much can she really know? Maybe Dumbledore was keeping Gellert close so that he could keep an eye on him."
Lily still found it hard to wrap her head around. Dumbledore had once lived in this very town. Lily wondered how many times he and Gellert had walked the same streets as she had, or enjoyed a chat on the same park benches. She pictured them, discussing the future of magic, sharing ideas about muggles and wizards and the new world that they might create. How much did any of them really know about Dumbledore? The man in whom they had placed all their trust?
"Blimey, and his little sister, did you know about her too?" Lily asked, still in shock.
James shook his head. "Dumbledore is and always has been a mystery. Part of me thinks it's better if we keep it that way."
Lily was about to ask him what else he knew when the doorbell rang, making them both jump.
"Do you think Dumbledore has come to wipe our memories?" James teased.
"If we're lucky it's Bathilda showing up with some more juicy gossip."
It wasn't Bathilda though. It was Alice, standing on their front step, an apologetic look upon her face.
"Sorry for intruding."
Lily's face fell. "Bad news?"
"It's not good."
"Bugger," Lily cursed. They'd had such a wonderful day, filled with sunshine and Harry's joyful laughter. She'd hoped for an equally blissful evening but when had any of Lily's hopes panned out?
"A threat?" Maureen McKinnon repeated. She was sitting in the big armchair, arms crossed, mouth set in a heavy frown. The sun had been rising when they landed outside of the safe house, the first time they'd done so in months. Now Sirius couldn't tell what time of day it was, the windows of the house so heavily curtained. Moody was always paranoid.
"There was an anonymous threat sent into the Daily Prophet," Dumbledore attempted to continue, his voice calm as ever while the rest of the room erupted into chaos. The entire McKinnon family was there, Danny included for the first time, The Longbottoms, even Augusta was present.
"Saying what exactly?"
"Well if you'd all keep quiet maybe he could tell you," Moody snapped. He always got so impatient.
"I'll read it out," Dumbledore suggested, flashing Moody a pointed look. Marlene was sitting beside Sirius on the couch, her face white as a sheet of parchment. Part of Sirius wondered whether she could hear anything being said.
"The following families are known blood traitors. This behaviour is treasonous and the consequences will be severe. If they care at all for the safety of their loved ones they will cease this behaviour and join the Dark Lord's honourable efforts to cleanse the Wizarding World."
"And who are the families?" Augusta asked. She barely batted an eyelash. If she was afraid she didn't let it show, her expression made of steel.
"The Longbottoms, the Potters and the McKinnons," Dumbledore confirmed.
"That's all?" Augusta clarified as if it mattered. Sirius was watching Maureen's expression as she sunk back into her chair. He didn't think he'd ever seen her so quiet.
"Yes," Dumbledore confirmed. "Only those three."
"So what do we do?" It was Alice who asked. Her voice quavered and Sirius could see the terror in her eyes. She had a son at home, not even one year old, and she was responsible for putting him in danger. Frank's hand slid across her back instinctively, drawing her into his side.
"Obviously we will take every precaution to keep you all safe," Moody piped up, "but we're not going to lie to you either, without the Order we are vulnerable." Sirius and Marlene bowed their heads shamefully. They knew, while none of their friends would dare to say it, that they were to blame for the Order falling apart.
Sirius heard a quiet whimper and when he looked up Amy was sitting on the edge of the couch, hand pressed over her mouth. Alex wrapped his arm around her, whispering something into her ear. Sirius could see the terror in her eyes, not for herself perhaps, but her children. Franny wasn't even five yet. Amy and Alex had a baby on the way, a baby whose life was now in jeopardy.
By the time they left the safe house, assured by Moody that they would be taken care of, everyone was drained. There wasn't anything left to be said. It was a beautiful day, clear blue skies and sun blazing. Just a few years ago they would've been soaking up the sunshine, playing a game of Quidditch or going for a dip in the river down the hill from the Potter's manor.
Now, Sirius was sitting on the front steps of a beaten down old farmhouse, his head pounding from too much alcohol and no sleep. Marlene looked just as rough, large black shades guarding her blue eyes.
"I think you should move back home," Maureen announced. Marlene and Sirius were sitting on the steps, the rest of the McKinnons standing around them. The Longbottoms had already left, Alice and Frank both anxious to return home to Neville.
"Mum," Marlene began, resistance in her voice.
"Amy and Alex are moving into their new place soon so there'll be more room. You can have your old bedroom back if you want, or Amy's if you prefer."
"I already have a place," Marlene reminded her mother.
"This way we would all be close together," Maureen stressed. "I'll worry, having you all the way in London, alone half the time, living in Diagon Alley of all places. You're not safe there—"
"And I won't be safe at home either with a target on all of our backs," Marlene said shortly.
"Maybe we should talk about this later," Alfred suggested to his wife. "We're all tired and in shock."
Sirius had never seen Maureen play the part of the anxious mother so well. She was usually the one who held it together, the person who assured them all that they were simply overreacting. Not now though.
"I'll take care of her," Sirius promised. He knew it would bug the hell out of Marlene, to suggest she needed his protection, but it helped release some of the stress on Maureen's face. "Nothing will happen to her Maureen, I swear to you."
"Okay," she finally agreed, taking everyone by surprise. "I trust you." It was the highest compliment Maureen McKinnon could've paid him. Sirius bowed his head and watched as the rest of Marlene's family apperated home, leaving the two of them behind.
"Take care of me," Marlene rolled her eyes. "Fucks sake."
"Cigarette?" Sirius pulled the pack from his back pocket. He'd been itching to have one from the moment they'd stepped outside.
"You know my grandmother had the sight," Marlene said as Sirius lit her cigarette with the tip of his wand. "My mother always told us it was a load of bollocks, that she was really just going senile, but I think now…" Sirius watched Marlene's face closely. Her lips were pressed together, forcing herself to hold back her emotions.
"It's real, don't you think?"
"I don't know," Sirius shrugged. He wasn't being entirely honest. He'd grown up in a superstitious family himself. His mother had been obsessed with prophecies. She'd had a woman who came to the house once a month and read her tea leaves. Sirius and Regulus had always watched, hiding behind doors and peaking their heads about to get a glimpse of what took place. Some of what the wise woman had told his mother had been closer to the truth than Sirius had ever imagined possible…
"I have these dreams…"
"They're nothing Marlene."
"I saw the accident at Donovan's. I saw it before it even happened."
"That was a coincidence." He wouldn't humour her. Not when he knew some of what she'd seen. It left a vile taste in his mouth.
"What if it wasn't?" He could hear the fear in her voice. Her hands were shaking, the ash from her cigarette falling all over her shoes. "I thought I'd have more time…"
"You do - hey," he forced her to look at him, "I'm not going to let anything happen. Do you hear me? No bloody dream is going to stop me." Marlene cracked a slight smile.
"You can't fight fate," she told him.
"Fuck fate. When have we ever done what we were supposed to?"
Remus was woken up by Alice, shaking his shoulder delicately until he roused. He didn't notice the tears that stained her cheeks at first, expecting she had woken him to announce that he'd over slept.
"Something's happened," she announced, her voice trembling, before informing Remus of the threat that had been made. He saw fear like never before in Alice's eyes that morning. The kind of fear one only had when there were lives, more important than their own, at stake. He'd almost forgotten what that felt like.
"Please Remus," Alice begged, sitting there on the bed with him, "please make it right with Sirius and Marlene." He hadn't seen either of them since Dorcas' funeral since he'd vowed to expose them for the traitors they were. Time had not mellowed his feelings.
"Divided we are weak."
"We're weak with a spy leaking our information too."
"Do you care about me, Remus?" She looked up at him, tears clinging to her dark eyelashes. His head fell shamefully.
"Of course." At the moment, Alice was perhaps the person he cared most about in the world. He'd lost Dorcas, lost his closest friends; she was all he had left. Alice had protected and cared for him at his worst, he couldn't betray her now. Yet, how could he work on a team with those he was certain would betray him?
"I'm not asking you," Alice continued, "I'm begging you. As a wife, a mother, I'm begging you to swallow your pride and do this for me." Remus had let down many people in his life but he couldn't bear to disappoint Alice. She'd put a roof over his head and food in his belly when he'd he'd needed. She had stood by him even when she hadn't agreed with what he'd done. If he let her down now he might as well just leave and never come back.
"Okay," Remus agreed. "I'll speak to Dumbledore."
X
A meeting was arranged for later that night at the safe house. The last time Remus had been inside that house had been the night Dorcas died. It still sent a shiver down his spine when he remembered her lifeless body being carried over the threshold.
"Good Evening Remus." Dumbledore was sitting in the armchair by the fireplace, his feet toasting by the edge of the hearth. He had a teacup and saucer in his hand and motioned towards the pot still steaming on the coffee table for Remus to join him.
"I was glad to receive your letter," he said as Remus settled into the couch. "I've been hoping to speak to you."
"Oh?"
"I didn't get a chance to pass along my condolences after Dorcas passed away."
"Thank you." Remus' eyes dropped to the tattered carpet under his feet.
"I heard there was quite the scene at her funeral." When Remus looked up, mouth agape, Dumbledore was watching him over the top of his half-moon spectacles. It was a look that assured Remus he need provide no explanation for his actions; Dumbledore already knew everything there was to know. Part of him wondered whether the old man knew what he was going to say before the words even left his mouth.
"Not my finest moment."
"Grief brings out the worst in us," Dumbledore assured him.
"I…um…I asked to meet with you today because I wanted to speak with you about the Order."
"Ah."
"I know why it is we broke apart," Remus continued, his throat like sandpaper, "but I think, under the current circumstances, it is best for everyone if we were to reform."
"Is that so?" Dumbledore lifted his teacup slowly to his lips, the sound of him sipping filling the empty space between them. "Alastor and I had the same thought," he went on, leaving long pauses between each sentence just to make Remus sweat. "Of course, we always come back to the same problem."
"The spy."
"Indeed," Dumbledore nodded. "What is a team when one cannot tell friend from foe?"
"A train wreck," Remus muttered under his breath. He saw the corner of Dumbledore's mouth twitch as he fought off a smile.
"You think it's Sirius I suppose?" Dumbledore inquired. He didn't ask it with the same dread the rest of Remus' friends did, half hoping his answer would not be the one they'd come to expect.
"Yes, sir." Remus couldn't lie to Dumbledore.
"That would be the most obvious answer," Dumbledore agreed, leaning forward to slide his teacup across the table. "Alas, I'm sorry to say I don't believe you've pegged the right man."
"Do you know who it is sir?" Remus felt the colour drain from his face.
"No, not yet, but I'm certain it isn't Mr. Black." He gave Remus a long, hard stare, "and I'm certain it isn't you." Well, that was a relief.
"I'm also certain that spy or not, we are weaker divided. Don't you agree?"
"Yes, sir."
"So it appears our next choice is easy if you agree to work as a team and put your differences aside."
"What other choice do we have?" Remus could not sit idly by and watch as every person he loved was picked off, one by one, until there was no one left. It would mean this whole bloody war had been for nothing. Alice was right, he would need to swallow his pride, shake Sirius' hand and agree to work together rather than against each other.
It was the first time James and Lily had been out of Godric's Hollow together in months. They left Harry in the care of Maureen and Alfred, who were more than happy to look after him as though Harry were their own grandchild. James and Lily travelled beneath James' invisibility cloak to the safe house. Dumbledore and Moody had insisted that every member of the Order of the Phoenix be present for this meeting.
It was the first time James had seen the whole gang gathered together in months. Remus and Peter on opposite ends of the room to Sirius and Marlene. Alice, Frank and Emmeline all squeezed on to the sofa. Dedalus Diggle and Hestia Jones standing across the room sipping on cups of tea. The room was packed and James and Lily were not even the last to arrive. They stood against the back wall with Kingsley who looked in higher spirits than James had seen him in months.
"Something good must be happening if we've managed to get those three into a room together," he said only loud enough for James and Lily to hear. James could hardly believe it himself. The last time he'd seen Remus he'd been kicking him out of his house for the rubbish he was spewing about Marlene and Sirius.
"Welcome, everyone." Dumbledore took his place before the fireplace where he could be seen clearly by all. "Thank you for gathering here today on such short notice." James' stomach was in knots.
"Alastor and I have spoken to many of you and have both agreed that it is of the utmost importance that we reform the Order of the Phoenix." The room went quiet for a moment. No one spoke, as if waiting for someone to protest. A few pairs of eyes shifted towards Remus, Marlene and Sirius – the three most likely to oppose – but no one said a word. Slowly, starting from the couch, a round of applause worked its way through the room and suddenly everyone was cheering for the return of the Order.
It was the first time in months that James had seen a glimmer of hope, a chance that things might change for the better. Without the Order, their cause was lost. There was no real fighting force around to oppose the Death Eaters. Now, together again, they could work as a team. They could have a fighting chance.
"Things will be different of course, different but better, we believe." James didn't care. Anything, anything, was better than being held on house arrest, waiting hopelessly for a war he could no longer play any part in to end. Lily must've felt the same. She took his hand and drew it to her lips, smiling.
"This is good," she whispered to James, "this is a good sign." It was the first time in months anyone had looked hopeful, that any had felt as though there was something worth being optimistic about.
Dumbledore and Moody informed them of the changes that would be made to the team. Things would be done under a veil of secrecy now. No one would know anything about the movements of their teammates and they would alter their network of communication. James only half listened. He knew there wasn't a chance in hell Lily or he would be allowed out on missions. He was jealous of course. He missed the fight, the adrenaline rush he got after every brush with death.
After that they gathered before the fireplace, shifting the furniture to the sides of the room, for a photograph. Sirius came over to James, grinning with excitement. Everyone squeezed in together, James and Lily still clutching hands. He was sure he looked like a deer in headlights, still shocked by the turn of events, by the excitement that suddenly flowed through his body.
"On the count of three," Kingsley told them, rushing back to the group to ensure he was in the picture as well. The camera, levitating in the middle of the room before them all, flashed in three seconds, capturing the long overdue reunion of the Order of the Phoenix.
"It's all going to be okay," Marlene said, wrapping her arms around James as the room began to clear. "We're going to be okay."
