Shepard threw her weight against Garrus with all of her might, her body blazing blue. She biotically grabbed Legion and heaved them both off of the edge of the dish plating. The noise was deafening - twisted metal debris rained from the collapsing feed horn of the satellite dish, drowning out her scream of "Just GO!"

Garrus landed on his back on the other side of the walkway attached to the building, Legion fell next to him and rolled to its feet. Both turned towards her in time to watch their Commander pitch herself forward onto the ground, narrowly avoiding a chunk of gnarled wreckage that slammed through the plate she had been standing on. It shuttered mightily and sank a few inches. Shepard's stomach lurched as she skidded with it, covering her head from smaller plummeting detritus.

"Shepard-Commander!" Legion's digitized voice called.

Shepard shrieked and pulled her leg into her body, then slid out of sight as the platform groaned and dropped further, suspended in open air by only the railing to the rest of the walkway. Garrus took off in long strides, but the Geth beat him by a wide margin. Legion dove at the edge, reaching over, his metal chassis screeching horribly along the grating. She clutched the ledge, dangling bodily as it swung in the open air. The robot grabbed her wrist and easily hauled her up into its arms.

"Legion, look out!" Garrus pointed above them. The Geth didn't even glance, just jumped to his feet and they both sprinted across the remaining disk as more pieces fell away. The entire satellite was coming apart in enormous chunks, taking out every piece of suspended catwalk attached to it, falling to the land below. Dust rose in great plumes, causing dirt to settle on the trio.

"Christ, the whole goddamn thing came down," Shepard murmured, her arms clenched tightly around Legion's neck. Eventually, the noise quieted as the last pieces pulled away and plummeted. The Geth shifted, bumping its elbow into a long piece of metal rebar sticking out of her calf muscle. The Commander hissed in a breath as it jostled. Legion turned its light towards the wound.

"Shepard-Commander, you are injured." It set her gently on the decking.

"Spirits, Shepard. Is there a particular reason you have a death wish? You realize we are more expendable than you are?" Garrus growled out.

She shook her head obstinately and swiveled away from him. "Not something I wanna rehash." Legion's light was moving over her leg, contemplating.

"It's not as bad as it looks, it punctured straight through the muscle - I think. Yank it out and medigel will do the rest until we can get back to the Normandy."

"Over here!" A man called through the dust cloud, coughing, his white lab coat coated in a fine layer of aerial dirt. It was the same scientist that had hailed them as they came off the shuttle earlier, Dr. Gavin Archer.

"What the hell is going on here?" Shepard demanded.

He looked down at her, his mouth set in a tight line. "Man's reach exceeding his grasp. Come, I'll explain." He waved them towards the direction he'd come from.

Legion stooped to scoop her up, and Garrus retracted his rifle to clip it into his back holster.

The scientist led them through the base, past consoles, through an open area, and into a medical lab. The Geth set her down daintily on a table.

Dr. Archer turned her ankle and winced while inspecting the bar through her leg. "While I am a doctor, I'm afraid I'm not the kind you need, Commander."

"I am versed in human anatomy and repair techniques." Legion spoke, his head shutters twitching.

Dr. Archer's eyebrows shot up. "It speaks… I thought perhaps you had captured one and were using it as an assistance mech."

"No, he is my friend, and here of his own free will." Shepard probed the end of the bar and winced.

"Amazing. I would so like to study-" the scientist began.

"Absolutely not happening. Now, Legion, let's get this over with. Be quick." She gestured at the bar. The machine wriggled its optical accessories, iris widening as it looked at her. It nodded and put both hands on the protruding metal.

"Whoa, whoa, hold on a second!" The Commander tore off a gauntlet and put the web of her thumb in her mouth. "Okay, do it."

"Shepard," Garrus stuck up his hand to stop them, but Legion had already snapped the object out of her calf with incredible speed. She choked out a muffled cry but pulled up her omni-tool to disperse the suit's medigel. The gush of blood from the wound only lasted a second before the gel kicked in to seal it shut. She dragged a bitten hand from her mouth and laid back, panting.

Garrus turned her leg over to probe both holes through the armor and make sure the wound closed. A talon pushed sweaty sticky hair from her forehead. The intimacy of the gesture unsettled her stomach. She tore her eyes from him to address the Geth. "Legion, you said you knew human anatomy and medicine. Do you know turian or krogan?"

He took so long to answer Shepard sat up on her elbows to see him. "No," he answered hesitantly.

Garrus and she shared a look.

Archer wrung his hands. "Commander, you've bought us some time, but I'm afraid not much. This isn't over yet."

"And who are you exactly?" She sat up and swung her leg off the table, gingerly testing her weight on it.

"As you know, Dr. Gavin Archer. I'm the chief scientist at this facility… and probably the only one left. This is Project Overlord, an attempt to gain influence over the Geth by interfacing a Human mind with a VI. The results have been… less than satisfactory.

Shepard snorted. "I'd hate to see what you'd call a disaster, considering I just destroyed an entire communication disk to keep it from uploading itself to the extranet."

"You can't dismiss the whole project. We succeeded, at least partially," the man watched as both Garrus and Legion began traipsing around the main room, scanning and moving the bodies of Cerberus science officers that were scattered about this portion of the base. "My brother, David, volunteered to serve as a test subject. But his mind couldn't handle the VI connection." He walked through the lab door and out to a console with the Commander right behind him. "He's like a virus now, infecting our network and seizing control of any technology he finds. That's why you had to destroy the dish. Imagine if his program had gone off world."

"How is he taking over electronics?"

"This is a hybrid intelligence, the likes of which I've never seen before. I don't know where the man ends and the machine begins."

"So, worst-case scenario is a technological apocalypse. Especially if he makes it to the extranet."

"Exactly. Davi… the VI has fortified itself down at Atlas station. To enter, you must manually override security from our Vulcan and Prometheus Stations." He brought up a map that showed glowing dots representing the other facilities, not too many clicks out from the current building. "Normally, all three project leads agree to cancel lockdown protocols. I can give my confirmation, but you'll have to reset the other two yourself." He tapped a few buttons on the console display and a large cylinder pushed itself out of the terminal. He turned it sideways and re-seated it, turning a blip green on the map.

Shepard folded her arms. "And what happens if I have to kill your brother?"

Dr. Archer plopped wearily into a chair. "Let's hope it doesn't come to that."

"Fair enough. Tell me about the other stations."

"Vulcan is our geothermal plant, it powers all the stations. Prometheus is a crashed geth ship full of dormant machines we use for our experiments. This is Hermes station, our communication uplink with the wider galaxy. Atlas station is where we hosted trials. And where my brother became… something else."

"And how did you get into this mess?"

He leaned forward and rubbed his temples, elbows rested on his knees. " David volunteered to interface with the VI. Theoretically safe, but… with artificial intelligence, nothing is safe."

She nodded. "And you wanted to influence the Geth?"

"Yes. We wanted to turn the Geth's religious impulses into a weapon. When we saw how they followed Saren, we realized we could sway them. With a proper figurehead, a virus with a face if you will, we could control the Geth."

"That's awfully ambitious."

"It would be the perfect weapon! Victory without casualties! We could avoid war with the machines all together." He stood and stepped closer to her. Legion very audibly reloaded its assault rifle, and the scientist nervously stepped back again. "There is transport on the ground outside the docking bay. The other stations are within driving distance. Good luck, Commander."


"HOLY SHIT. GARRUS. What is this?!" Shepard kind of ran/gimped up to the vehicle the Doctor had spoken of.

"NO," her grumpy turian answered.

"I'm sure it's got a better name than 'no'!" She threw him a dark look before turning lovingly up at the large hovercraft on the landing pad.

"This is an M-44 Hammerhead," Legion answered helpfully.

"The Hammerhead… we could pick this thing up with the Normandy, couldn't we? Sometimes I realize I really was dead for two years. Tim will let us have it, I'm sure…"

"Shepard, no. I'm not getting in there with you driving. I've still got a sore spot in my back because of you and the Mako," Garrus made an interesting thrumming noise from his chest while he spoke.

"Shepard, YES! It's too late, I'm keeping it!" She found the lever for the hatch release and hopped inside happily. It was only a second before the hover jets roared to life and lifted the hull off the ground, her mischievous cackling ringing out from the cockpit.

Legion looked at him, slowly undulating his shutters.

"Don't give me that look. If you are shaken into a pile of bolts… it wasn't me," he sighed and pulled himself up into the shuttle.


It really wasn't as bad as the mako. He was loath to admit it, but suffering Shepard's maniacal driving was much easier without the need of a ground facing suspension system. Vulcan station had some fringe raising moments through a lava flow but went generally well. The geth ship's enormous turret was terrifying at Prometheus station. He lost years of his life as the lasers grazed the crappy kinetic barriers of the Hammerhead when Shepard moved just a touch too late.

"David Archer is autistic?! That son-of-a-bitch! He said his brother 'volunteered'. How much did David even understand? He used his own brother." Shepard angrily smacked the button to power down the console mid log. Her tirade dragged him from his thoughts. "I'll never understand people who get the precious gift of family and just… use it and destroy it."

"Many organic tendencies confuse the Geth consensus as well." Legion was walking along behind her.

"Tell me about it," she rolled her eyes.

"We also do not comprehend the organic fascination with self poisoning, auditory damage, and sexually transmitted disease." The machine's iris widened as they roamed through the darkened halls of Atlas Station.

Shepherd's bark of laughter echoed in the emptiness. "We'll hafto take you for a party sometime, Legion. It might make more sense then. Also, that statement was made in sarcasm. I don't actually need you to tell me about all the stupid shit organics do. For the most part, I'm well aware." Her lip twitched into a grin, the little ring catching the light. Garrus was embarrassingly distracted by it for a few moments.

"Acknowledged, Shepard-Commander."

"Garrus, do you think you can get this lift working?" She pointed at a bank of consoles.

The sniper kicked a panel off and stuck his head up under it. "Maybe, none of this looks too charred." A few minutes of 'spirits' and other miscellaneous curses her translator did not work on, and the elevator light came on, whirring as it moved up to their floor.

"Brilliant as always, Vakarian!" She trotted down the stairs to stand in front of the doors, favoring her injured calf still.

"You realize we have a built in hacker for these things, right?" He motioned to Legion.

She shrugged. "Old habits die hard. Besides, you get grouchy if I don't exercise you."

"I do not get grouchy." The lift dinged open and deposited five Geth out into the room as he replied. They dispatched them quickly enough, but when they stepped into the lift, the AI blared more of its unintelligible digital speech.

Legion whipped his headlight back and forth. "Shepard-Commander, using a lift that can be controlled by a rogue A.I. does not seem to be the most pertinent decision."

"Well, I sure didn't see any stairs so what choice," she trailed off as the lift dropped suddenly out from under them. Luckily, it only moved a few floors before screeching to a halt. The three crashed loudly into the floor.

"Warning, this elevator is not in service. Please contact facility support." The automated VI spoke before they plunged, careening all the way to the bottom of the shaft. Shepard managed to catch them all in a hastily thrown together pod of biotic energy that lessened their fall.

She sat up off the floor, groaning. "Are you guys okay?"

Garrus was patting his fringe tips. "I think I'm still in one piece."

"No lasting physical damage acquired, Shepard-Commander."

She dragged herself to her feet.


The trio fought through rooms of A.I. commanded Geth before eventually coming upon the server command console.

"Fucking finally," Shepard breathed. She darted up to the computer and set all five fingers on the circular menu dial. As soon as her gauntleted digits touched it however, a verdant flash engulfed her form, lighting up her omni-tool and quickly replacing its orange glow with green. The A.I. screeched through the speakers, but she could feel the sound vibrate through her molars.

"Spirits, Shepard, are you alright? The damn thing shorted out this console," Garrus moved up to inspect the little plume of smoke that came from the seams of the metal covers.

The Commander stumbled around the computer and took some jerky steps toward the door. It opened, but she lost her footing and knelt in the opening.

"Shepard-Commander? Are you experiencing distress?" Legion's voice wasn't intelligible to her.

She blinked her eyes open, not realizing she'd closed them. A digital overlay of data cascaded down the surrounding walls, completely encasing her as the imagery met in the middle of the floor right under her feet. "What?"

He spoke again, but a holographic image of three humans strode through the doorway and disappeared in the darkness in front of her. What the hell was that? She stood to follow.

The door slammed shut behind her.

"Shepard! NO!" Garrus threw his weight against the cool metal. Legion's chassis battered against the offending device as well, clattering loudly.

What the fuck is happening? Shepard thought to herself as she staggered around following the digital apparitions. Did this A.I. take over the techno eyes Cerberus gave me? A Geth appeared, brilliant white in her computerized prison. She stared dumbly at it. Is that thing real? It shot her, bouncing a round off of her kinetic shield. She took cover in the doorway she'd just walked through.

The A.I. manifested itself in a digital window, still screeching. It's last words made sense to her, though. "...make it STOP!"

"David," she whispered. There was no answer. She pulled her shotgun up and rounded the entryway to blast the geth trooper. It exploded into little cubes with a sound like breaking glass and dissipated. Maybe it was real? And if so, where she was was still real. Her gun was outlined in a brilliant bright blue to her eyes. She continued on with her new shuffling gate. Shepard hopped through a window and into a lab. A holo superimposed itself on the glowing lines of code that built the room, building a picture of a Geth strapped to a chair, with Gavin standing over it and David rocking back and forth on the ground.

"The square root of 906.01 is 30.1. The square root of 912.04 is 30.2…" David chattered on. He was a mathematical savant. Shit. Suddenly this whole A.I./ human intelligence thing seemed plausible.

"Time is running out. How do I get the geth's attention?" Holo Dr. Archer spoke.

The Geth in the holo made the same digital cadence they always did, but shockingly, David answered back in its language. He turned to his holo brother. "The robot says 'hello'."

Oh. Shit.

"Eureka, David, you are a miracle worker!" Dr. Archer exclaimed as the hologram petered out.

Two Geth primes stood in the holograph's place. They lit her up, dropping her shields before she could dive behind what she assumed was a low table for cover. They both stopped to eject thermal clips, so she launched herself at them in a flash of bright light. Huh. So her biotics still worked here.

"David, are you trying to tell me what happened?" She called out.

"MAKE….MAKE IT STOP!" The A.I.'s harsh, choppy voice pushed through digital static.

"Just hang in there, David, I'm going to find you!" There was no answer that time.

She pressed on, and was shown more holos, veneered over the lab outlines. The story grew darker as David's mind was obviously deteriorating, and Gavin's desperation mounted before Tim pulled the plug on the whole thing. Shepard came up in a large windowed hallway that overlooked what seemed like a large shielded memory core. To her left a door opened and she could see what looked like a cargo lift, running down into the room with the core. She walked over towards it and pushed the call button.

"Warning. Elevator exceeds weight capacity." A chipper female VI spoke.

"Fuck!" The Commander barely threw herself behind a console before the lift arrived, releasing a whole slew of Geth rocket troopers and hunters on top of her. Where the hell had Garrus and Legion gone?

Shepard was greatly outnumbered, and took quite a few rounds to her body when her shields were down, but she dashed through cover, ferociously gutting and blasting the robots one at a time. Only once the room was quiet, other than her exerted breathing, did she finally step onto the lift and rode it down to the core. Digitally imposed light flowed through cooling hoses to a computer core hidden behind a kinetic barrier and physical metal shielding. A few minutes of contemplation brought the answer she needed.

"Node acquired. Normandy SR2 within range. Attempting to establish upload link." The pleasant VI voice came over the facility speakers.

"Oh no you fucking don't! EDI, there's a rogue A.I. attempting to upload into the Normandy!" She yelled into her com. A beat passed. "Again."

There was no answer.

"EDI, are you there? Come in Normandy." There was nothing but a slight humming of static coming back through her communicator. Well, the old-fashioned way would have to do.

"Fuck this," Shepard tore through the tubing to the core with her blade. A screeching alarm blared as liquid poured over the floor from the lines.

Geth flowed out of the woodwork and the torn hydraulic ducting reeled back the physical shielding to expose the core. She fought madly, biotically charging into primes, hunters, rocket drones, and regular combat units. Shepard reached into the neck apparatus of a Geth soldier and ruptured its conduit with an armored hand, coating herself in their white, oily coolant before pirouetting into a prime, omni-blade drawn. Each unit shattered into thousands of little squares in her augmented vision, tinkling like chimes as the pieces bounced to the floor. She pumped her shotgun into the core as often as she could as she dashed by it on her way to another target.

Gavin Archer's voice broke over the airway. "Commander, I'm trying to pull the plug, to disconnect Vulcan station from all power! David, you must stop this!"

"DAVID DOESN'T WANT TO BE HERE ANYMORE!" The A.I. shrieked.

She tried to reply to Dr. Archer, but her com was still just static.

Finally, the last enemy fell. Gasping for breath, her sweat poured down her suit neck. She'd torn her fresh wound back open - blood oozed from the hole in her leg armor. She limped up to the core and drained multiple thermal clips into it. It exploded like the geth had, in a blinding flash of light and millions of small cubes. The digitalization of her vision faded as the core shield faded. Shepard blinked, trying to clear the red dots left over from light too bright in her field of view.

And there was David. Rigged up by wires and hooks into the computer console, tubes shoved down his throat. His eyelids were pinned open by an apparatus that encircled his shaved head and was stuck into his flesh. He was held aloft in a gruesome crucifixion pose, his naked weight hanging from his spindly arms. Grimey tear tracks covered his sunken in cheeks and ran down into a metal collar clamped tightly about the poor man's neck.

Shepard gasped in a ragged breath at the sight. "Christ. Holy fuck. I'm… I'm going to get you out of there, David," she called shakily.

"Commander! Commander, I'm begging you, wait before you do anything rash!" She spun when she heard him, and sure enough, Gavin Archer ran through the doors from the lift. Had he been running along behind her this whole time? She pounced as soon as he was near, putting a fist through his mug and dragging him to his knees by his coat collar.

"PLEASE! Commander!" He wailed.

"Rash?! Like forcing my own brother into a torture experiment?!" She screamed in his face.

"I know how this looks, but I never intended any harm come to him. You must believe me!"

"I don't have to believe shit!" She grabbed a handful of his hair and forced him to look up at David.

"I didn't plan this! It was all an accident. Seeing David communicate with the geth… it all seemed harmless."

"And before you knew it, you were running your own private hell?!"

His face screwed up in anger. "I had no choice! The demands were incredible! The Illusive Man doesn't broker failure! I had one chance to avoid a bloody war!"

"Of course you had a choice! I don't care what the fucking Illusive Man wanted, it didn't give you the right to play god! I'd die before I tortured my own kin!"

"People like you are too afraid to make difficult decisions themselves. Everyone relies on men like me to make the tough choices for them!" He grabbed her hands and tried to pry them off.

Shepard slapped him hard, the force jerked his head to the side. "You know NOTHING about me! You'd sacrifice your brother's happiness for your own ambition. LOOK AT HIM! He'll never be the same after your betrayal! Cerberus will never stop hunting him! He'll be a lab rat forever!"

David was swiveling his eyes helplessly. "The square root of 906.01 is…" his voice was modulated through the console's speakers.

"30.1." Archer answered, his own eyes wide, darting back and forth over David's limp body. Minutes of silence passed. He spoke quieter this time. "What I've done to David is unethical. If he dies, it's unforgivable. Please, let me take care of him."

Shepard released his collar, throwing him to the ground. "I've seen enough of your cruelty to know he'll never be free of it. He's coming with me."

"NO! Leave him! He's too valuable!" The stupid prick stood up and took a pot shot at her with a pistol he drew from his belt.

The Commander's rage fanned higher. She took one step towards him and in a blur she'd hiked him against the wall above her head, her body roiling blue energy. She snatched his weapon and pressed it into his forehead, the red hot barrel searing into flesh. He sniveled miserably.

"If you even think about coming after him, I will personally hunt you down to the ends of the galaxy and make sure this bullet finds you." She pulled her arm from him and let him drop into a crumpled heap.

"Where will you take him?" He mumbled.

"Somewhere that can help him. Minus the torture." Shepard ejected the heat sink and dismantled the pistol, letting the pieces clank to the floor. "The Illusive Man can fire me for all I care. Joker, can you hear me now?"

"Yes, Commander."

"Send Dr. Chakwas and Dr. Solus down in the shuttle and prepare for pick up. I've got a Hammerhead to bring home." She sank against the opposite wall from Dr. Archer, keeping her shotgun well trained on his form.

Shepard activated the medi-gel dispenser on her suit again. The puddle of blood she was resting in was getting decent sized, and she didn't need Chakwas yelling at her instead of helping David. He'd been speaking through the console, alternating between reciting square roots and begging them to make it stop. Archer was sitting quietly, his head buried in his arms. How much time had passed? It felt like an eternity. Grunting, she stretched out her now stiff injured leg. Always, as soon as you stopped moving, it would all catch up to you. She tried to glance at her omni-tool screen, but it swam in her vision. She dropped her arm again and sighed.

"Shepard!" Garrus's agitation was apparent in his tone before he even sprinted into her field of view from a different doorway than she and Archer had traversed. His dual voice boxes vibrated erratically. Legion was right behind him.

"Shepard-Commander, is your damage significant?" They both ran over to her, Garrus dropped to a knee and brought up her suit readouts like he wasn't about to believe whatever answer she was going to say.

"Physically, no, mentally, maybe." She motioned up to where David was fastened to the computer. "Legion, you said you know human anatomy, can you give him a preliminary and see if you can't determine the best way to remove him from there? Chakwas and Mordin should be here soon."

"Acknowledged." The geth moved over to inspect the apparatus hooked to the man.

She locked eyes with Garrus.

"We had to go through a maze of labs in a whole other part of the building, clearing out Geth, or we would have been here sooner. We heard you call for evac - I was afraid you were requesting Mordin and Dr. Chakwas for yourself. We couldn't raise you before that."

"I think I got… hacked by the A.I. My communicator wouldn't work and it took over my eyes," she mumbled.

"Your… eyes." Garrus spoke slowly.

"I guess Cerberus's bionic eyeballs arn't all they're cracked up to be if they can be overtaken." A shiver rolled down her spine. What more of her body could be hacked? And when would Tim use it against her? She rotated her head up. Yeah, that look on his face was about how she felt about it. Terrified. He must have put two and two together, his good mandible wavering.

"Keep an eye on Archer, will you? I'm fighting off sleep desperately here. I went a little ham on the biotics." She asked.

Garrus nodded.


The shuttle ride back with David, the doctors, and Garrus was rough. She'd immediately wished she'd piloted the Hammerhead to the Normandy instead of leaving it for Legion. Garrus was shuffling around and glaring at her. She was starting to recognize these particular growling sub vocals were 'upset'. Chakwas didn't seem bothered, but Mordin was glancing between them while Shepard pointedly ignored the turian. David laid sedated serenely on a stretcher.

"Commander, I'd better see that leg in the med bay when we get back." Dr. Chakwas gently chided her.

"Of course. I've got to speak with Legion anyway, we'll make it a party." Shepard bent forward to rest her chin in her palm, her elbow propped on her knee.

The shuttle rocked as it set down inside the Normandy's cargo bay. Shepard poised herself to leap out as soon as the door opened.

Just as it did though, a taloned hand clamped around her bicep. "Shepard, please."

Thankfully, Mordin herded the rest of them out quickly. She sighed and dragged every ounce of self-control she could muster together. "What, Garrus?"

"You said you were hacked? Is that why you ran off by yourself?" He muttered.

"I really don't want to do this right now Garrus." She walked out of the shuttle and made for the lift. His heavy boot falls tapped along behind her. The door opened as soon as she hit the call button, Mordin, in his infinite wisdom must have sent it back down. Bless that Salarian. They both loaded in and the doors closed.

"Shepard, you almost got yourself killed," he murmured, his sub vocals changing pitch.

"Garrus, I nearly get myself killed on every mission we go on. That's pretty normal."

"Not like this. You weren't as reckless on the SR1. You aren't expendable, Shepard."

She was silent, fists balled at her sides.

He tried a different tactic. "And if you are hackable… what does that say about Cerberus's plans? What did they do to you?" The doors dinged open on the crew deck. She stormed out of the lift and across the mess, Garrus right on her heels.

"Shepard!" He barked angrily, his vocals dropping back down dangerously.

Oh. So he wanted to do this in front of a room full of people. Jack, Jacob, Samara, Tali, and Thane, along with a smattering of crew, were all present. Alright. She whirled around on him and stuck a finger in his face. "NO! I tried to talk about this! I tried to warn you! You don't get to be a piss ant about it now. YOU were too busy drugging yourself out and fucking around with that goddamned gun to listen!" She shouted.

The room went silent promptly. They stared at each other for a moment, both drawing themselves up to their full heights. Garrus took a step toward her, bumping his keel into her chest plate. Thane jumped up from the table and moved towards them.

"Uh oh, Mommy and Daddy are fighting." Jack called out.

Shepard gave the biotic her best death glare from over Garrus's shoulder while Thane circled behind her. Generally, the turian was easygoing. It was unusual for him not to defer to her, and even more unusual for him to be combative. Something clicked. She squared her shoulders. "Did you take a stim before we left? Is that why you are so pissy?"

He snarled at her, mandible pulled back, baring teeth and everything. "Oh, yes, I know I'm a fuckup but Spirits forbid, I can't just be livid because the woman I mourned- no, the hero I mourned for two years has got such a hang up about being alive that she is actively trying to get herself murdered on every mission I've been on!" The look on Shepard's face sent a burn of satisfaction through his chest. His eyes flashed back and forth between her and Krios behind her shoulder.

She really, really wanted to just deck him and duke it out right there in the mess. Since when did he think it was okay to openly challenge her? "You can kindly see yourself, THE FUCK away from me Vakarian," she rumbled out, her own voice low with warning too.

Garrus stood over her, the growling noise vibrating through his chest for long enough she thought they really were going to just come to blows right there. Eventually he decided on reason, spinning on the ball of his foot he stalked back to the battery. Shepard stomped into the infirmary, tearing her hard suit armor off as she went. She peeled her under armor off and threw herself petulantly on a bed.

Chakwas had to hide her grin behind a data pad. The great Commander acting like a mad four-year-old was a bit… endearing. "Are you alright, Commander?"

She exhaled loudly. "You heard all of that, I assume."

The Doctor nodded. "Unfortunately." She gingerly prodded the wound from the metal bar before flicking open her tissue scanner.

"I want you to know I was thinking of you when I decided not to beat his peanut ass into pulp."

"Much appreciated, Commander. Patching you up is enough of a full-time job." The humor in Chakwas's voice disarmed her a bit. Mordin strolled over, his scanning tool beeping.

"How's David?" She asked.

"Mental and physical trauma significant. Unable to determine extent, so for now he is sedated, currently on a painkiller and nutrient drip." Mordin rattled off while tapping furiously on a data pad.

Chakwas moved over to her terminal. The salarian put the pad down next to Shepard on the bed and folded his arms across his chest, blinking at her.

"What, Mordin? You look like you have something on your mind." She pulled her hair down out of its ponytail.

He sighed. "Aware that... mission is dangerous. Different species react differently to stress."

Shepard mumbled an agreement while dragging her nails over her scalp.

The Professor plowed on. "Sexual activity normal stress relief for both humans and turians. Still recommend caution. Warn of… chafing."

She was gaping openly at him by the end of that doozy of a sentence. Chakwas had conveniently ducked her face behind her terminal and coughed suspiciously. Mordin, to his credit, was blinking at her with his professor stoicism.

"Whoa, whoa Mordin, what the hell?"

"Turians based on dextro-amino acids, human ingestion of tissue could provoke allergic reactions. Anaphylactic shock possible. So don't…. ah… ingest."

"Ingest. Good god Mordin, where did you come up with this sex talk all of a sudden?"

"All of a sudden?" He opened and closed his mouth a few times, eyes wide.

"Did you not just hear us out there? One step from beating the absolute shit out of each other? Did you hear him growl at me?!" She swung her legs off the bed and stared at the salarian incredulously.

He brought a slender finger up to rub his chin with a bemused expression. "I did."

"And what? You thought that was some sort of, I don't know, mating dance?" The old salarian's wrinkled mouth pulled into a grin.

"Okay, don't answer that. Karin, help me here."

Chakwas stood up and walked back over with a chuckle. "He's braver than I. Take this as advice from an old friend. Lighten up, Commander." The Doctor bent to run a tissue regenerator over the wound.

There was still a curl to the salarian's mouth as he spoke. "Human socio and religious complexes around sexual intercourse do not extend to other species, happy to give recommendations as doctor anytime. As I said, sexual activity normal. Will forward advice booklet to your quarters, valuable diagrams, positions comfortable for both species, erogenous zone overviews. Can supply oils or ointments to reduce discomfort. Gave EDI electronic relationship vids to use as necessary,"

"You gave EDI porn? Wait a minute, Mordin, you're just fucking with me arn't you!"

"Shocking suggestion! Doctor - patient confidentiality a sacred trust! Would never dream of mockery." He managed to look offended.

"Joker has an extensive pornographic library if you are looking for something specific, Commander." EDI cut in.

"Et tu EDI?" Shepard dropped her head into her hand. Chakwas didn't even try to hide her laugh.

"I do not understand the correlation between Joker's library and a reference to the play Julius Caesar."

"Never mind, thanks EDI. I'll ask you if I need help with anything."

"Logging you out."