A/N: Those who still are, thanks for sticking with me!
Chapter 3
Olivia Benson's Apartment
April 7, 2009
Olivia entered her apartment as quietly as possible. It was 12:30 in the morning but all her paperwork was completed and filed so she could enjoy her day off. She couldn't believe her baby was four years old. She ordered a special doll that looked just like her and they were going to pick it up and have a special brunch with the doll at this huge store, get matching outfits, etc. Liv didn't see the appeal, but she knew her baby would absolutely love it.
After seeing the nanny to the door, Liv jumped into the shower. It was always the first thing she did when she got home, before hugging her daughter if she was early enough or before sticking her head in Serena's bedroom if she was sleeping. She didn't want Serena to touch any part of her that was exposed to the atrocities she dealt with every day. Olivia knew it was a ridiculous notion, but that was how she felt.
When she walked into her bedroom after her shower, she was surprised to see Serena laying in her bed looking at her. Serena was the mirror image of Olivia in miniature form. She had long brown hair that caught waves when it got wet. She sported the cutest set of bangs that Liv kept trying to tuck behind her ears. They never seemed to grow out and Olivia couldn't bring herself to cut them. Her eyes were the exact almond shape as her mother's and the same deep chocolate brown. Her skin was naturally tan and she had perfect baby teeth.
"Hello, sweetheart! What are you doing up?". Liv noticed that Serena seemed deep in thought. Her little eyebrows were furrowed and she wore the oddest expression.
"I couldn't sleep" she said. "I have an important question."
Liv threw on a black t-shirt and green pajama bottoms before crawling into her bed. She sat up and faced her daughter. "It must be very important to keep you awake this late. Or, rather, this early. Happy birthday angel!" She said lovingly as she tweaked Serena's nose.
Serena smiled but it faded quickly. She really did appear troubled and that didn't sit well with Olivia. Serena was an extremely calm and quiet child; one would say her name was perfect. She was always so thoughtful, analyzing everything she saw. Like her mom, she thought of others first. She sported a smile that was infectious and melted the heart of anyone who was privileged to see it. Serena hardly ever cried, even as a baby. She would fuss a bit when she was hungry or needed a diaper change, but outright crying? Nope. Not as long as her immediate needs were met and Olivia doted on her every need. Her baby was just serene. At times, Elliot would remind Liv of the doctor's words, "She's an old soul."
"Tell me honey. What's keeping you awake?"
"We are talking about where we live and stuff. Mrs. Greene said it's important to know our address in case of emergency. She was saying something else too but I was going over my German lessons in my head because I already know all this stuff. You know, some kids just only know that they live in New York?" She said this part with exasperation. Liv had to chuckle. She really was too smart for her age.
"Anyway, I was sitting next to Alice and she knew the street she lived on but not the number. She also said her parents' names are "Just Mommy and Daddy." Lots of kids said that. Then it was my turn and I told Mrs. Greene where I live, your cell phone number, the house number, and the number to your desk and Elliot's. Then I said, "My Momma's name is Detective Olivia Benson of the 1-6."
Serena stopped talking for a moment and looked down in her lap. Liv was listening intently but couldn't see what would make her daughter wake up in the wee-hours of the morning on her birthday to talk.
"I'm so proud you knew all that. I guess being a cop's kid, I went a little overboard making sure you had all the necessary information, especially since your classmates barely know their own last names."
Serena continued. "Right. So after I finished, Owen said that I didn't tell them my daddy's name. I told him I don't have a daddy and he started saying that everyone has a daddy and maybe he wasn't around because he didn't love me cuz I'm a know-it-all." She took a deep breath before asking, "Momma is that true? Who is my daddy?"
Olivia knew this day would come and she was dreading it. She felt guilty and unworthy of this beautiful girl who was her entire world. She tried to stall. "What did Mrs. Greene say to Owen?"
Serena was quick to answer. "She said that everyone's family is different and some other stuff about using nice words that I really wasn't paying attention to because I was thinking. Do you even know who my daddy is?" She looked at Liv with anticipation. Olivia has never lied to her daughter and she didn't want to start now. She always found an easy way to answer honestly.
"No baby. I don't. I may not know who he is, and we will discuss that more when you get older, but I am eternally grateful to him because he gave me you and you are so loved. Never, ever forget that." Liv was ready for more questions, confusion, perhaps a bit of a breakdown. None of that came. Instead, after a moment's contemplation, Serena looked up at Olivia with her big, beautiful smile. Now, Olivia was confused.
Serena giggled. "It's okay Momma. That makes me feel better. If you don't know who my daddy is, then how am I as'post to? And our family is perfect anyway. We have Carmella and Elliot and Uncle Fin, and Uncle Munch. Even the captain treats us like a daddy. Nobody else has a family like that!"
Olivia let out the breath she had been holding and had to chuckle herself. Today, it didn't matter if she never pursued her partner in her rough night of sex. Melinda tried to get her to report the drugs and bruises, but Liv couldn't, wouldn't put her sex life under that kind of scrutiny with the people she worked with. With the people Serena (and she) considered family. Today, her daughter was happy and logical about the whole thing. Today is what mattered.
Liv turned off the light and cuddled up with her baby. When she heard the deep breathing, cute little snores coming from the bundle wrapped in her arms, she renewed her vow to be both a good mother and father. Her daughter would never want for anything.
-SVU-
"Come on, baby. Let's go!" Olivia started shouting to her daughter as she rummaged around the living room. "Where the hell are my keys?" she mumbled. "Serena!"
Liv didn't notice that her daughter was standing by the front door, having been ready to leave for the last 20 minutes. Serena was the ultimate girl. She never wore pants, not even pajamas. She loved making her skirts, dresses, and nighties swirl around her and her shoes had to be shiny. Today was definitely no exception. She had been waiting to wear her birthday dress since Liv bought it over a week ago. It was lavender with white ruffles. She wore white tights and black Mary Janes. Her hair hung loose down her back while the front held two ponytails to keep it out of her face. Olivia thought she was too cute for words.
She even carried a small pocket book that held some crayons, pencils, stickers, and paper. Serena was extremely bright; she could read on her own before most children could form a full sentence. She was always coloring or writing and had no interest in television. Her current concentration was languages. She wanted to work for the United Nations when she grew up and of course, she had to speak every language on the planet. She had Uncle Munch to thank for the subscription to the children's version of language CD's that she listened to every night. The thing is, she was good at it. It was like her brain just absorbed the information while she was sleeping. She could even do pretty good accents. Her nanny, Carmella, has been speaking Spanish to the child since Olivia went back to work. Serena was three months old and she understood both languages completely. Naturally, in her brilliant little mind, other languages should be as simple. Elliot laughed and Liv of course went along with it. Uncle Munch however, took full credit and encouraged her every whim.
"Momma, relax. Your keys are on the counter, but your gun is still in its box." Olivia's hand immediately reached to her side holster. Of course, her daughter was right so she spun on her heel and ran to the bedroom leaving Serena still waiting patiently by the door, with a smile on her angelic face.
-SVU—
Once they got off the elevator, Serena let go of Liv's hand and ran into the squad room. They had to stop there so Liv could re-sign her last DD5, but the child didn't mind. The 1-6 was her favorite place to visit. As soon as she ran in, she ran straight into Elliot.
"Ooof! I'm sorry. I...Elliot!" she shouted as she lifted her arms and jumped up high, knowing he would catch her.
"Hi baby! Happy birthday!" Serena, like her mother, had a calming effect on Elliot. She would always bring an immediate smile to the faces of all the guys in the unit. "Let's see...are you one?" he teased as he simultaneously blew raspberries on her neck while tickling her sides as he counted. "Are you two? Are you three? Are you four?"
"Yes" the child could barely get the word out between fits of laughter. "But you know that a'cause you were there!" The story of her birth was her favorite at bedtime. She knew she was so loved by the men her mother worked with. They were the only family she had, and in her world, all she would ever need.
"I wouldn't have missed it" Elliot confessed as he pulled her against him for a real birthday hug.
"You almost did" interrupted Fin. "My hand is still recovering and my manhood cringes every time Liv screams at someone. Now, hand her over" he said as he took Serena out of Elliot's arms. "Happy birthday, baby girl."
"Thank you, Uncle Fin. How come you call me and Momma 'baby girl' when neither of us are babies? I'm four now, you know."
"You're both special, that's why. Besides, you both love it." He was validated when Serena threw her arms around him as Liv flashed him a huge smile as she looked up from behind her desk.
"Playing birthday hookey?" asked Munch as he and Cragen walked out of the captain's office. "What's on today's agenda?" he inquired as he walked over to where his partner held his favorite child and rubbed her back while kissing her cheek.
"Momma won't tell me" she confessed with the saddest pouty face any of the men had ever seen. They all turned to look at Liv as if she committed the gravest of offenses.
"It's a surprise!" Olivia said, suddenly on the defensive. She started to walk over to claim her daughter and continue her special day. This morning was rushed due to Serena's late-night Q&A. They both slept in causing the mad run around in the living room.
As Serena was midair between Liv and Fin, Cragen interrupted. "Sorry Olivia, but we have a vic down at St. Catherine's. She'll only talk to a female detective. I wouldn't ask on your day off, but the MO fits the midnight rapist. I need you to go down and get a statement, then the guys can take over."
Liv's face fell. She loved being a mom so much that she considered this her special day as well. The victim may have needed a female, but Serena needed her mother. However, the child being the way she was, chimed in.
"Can I wait here with Elliot?" Olivia's heart melted. Any other kid would have thrown a tantrum, but not her baby.
Liv looked towards Elliot who just stood there holding his arms out with a smile on his face. Whenever she brought Serena to the station house, the child's feet never touched the floor. The squad adored her, they just couldn't help it and they loved to show it. Liv once again faced Serena. "I'm sorry baby. Statements like this don't take long. I'll be as fast as I can so we can still have our day."
"It's okay, Momma. Go help the lady. Me and Elliot will have fun while we wait." She hugged her mother and Olivia returned the hug fiercely. "Momma, you're squishing my lungs" Serena chided.
She trusted Elliot implicitly, especially given how much he loved Serena, but she never left her daughter with anyone except Carmella. Ever. If the kid didn't mind, then why should she? Liv handed her little girl over to Elliot as she continued kissing her face, well after she was back in Elliot's arms. Cragen cleared his throat and told Munch to go with her. Out of the three men, he was the least intimidating, but just as competent. John grabbed the keys to the squad car as he tried to get Liv to leave.
"That's my heart, my life in your hands, El" she said as she walked backwards. The room turned quiet. She didn't have to say anymore. Elliot nodded and held Serena tighter as Liv was led out the doors.
"Can we get something to eat? Momma was rushing this morning and I only had a toaster pocket. She said we'd eat wherever we are going, but now I'm hungry." Serena put her little hands on Elliot's cheeks to get his attention as his eyes were glued to the doors.
"We sure can," he said as he gave Liv's little girl his full attention.
-SVU—
It was 90 minutes later when Olivia and John finally left St. Catherine's. Liv was beyond pissed. The girl wasn't raped. She was having rough sex with a frat brother and cried rape when her boyfriend got suspicious when he saw her bruises. The midnight rapist has been all over the news so she ran with it. It was actually John who called her out on her lie. He could see the rage rolling off Olivia. Her day off was half gone, her time with her daughter ruined. He jogged to keep up with her stride and was silent as she pulled out her phone.
"Hey El, is Serena okay?" She didn't offer pleasantries, not today.
"Of course," he replied. "Hold on" he told her as he walked around to her desk and put the phone against Serena's ear.
"Hi Momma." To Liv, her voice was a calming melody. "Are you coming to get me now?"
"Yes, baby. I'm on my way. Whachadoin?" Liv kept the conversation going as John started the sedan and began to navigate their way back to the station.
"Coloring. Uncle Fin said my last picture was 'lonely' and needed some company on his fridgerator. He's so silly" Serena stated as she started to giggle.
"Yes, Uncle Fin is very silly. I..." Olivia's sentence was cut short when she heard a bang and a commotion on the other end of the line. She listened as chaos reigned and she was stuck in the car with Munch. "Serena?! Baby answer me!" Liv screamed into the phone. "John drive faster!" She continued to scream, beg, and plead for her daughter to come back on the phone.
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