Chapter 25: Bella Notte
Things were starting to happen fast.
With my eyes firmly shut and Santana's mouth against mine, I blindly stumbled backwards against my bedroom door frame. Somewhere between the couch and the entrance to my bedroom, Santana had found her way into my arms, her legs firmly wrapped around my hips as I held her up. My fingers were digging into the skin of her thighs, exposed by the shortness of her dress. Her arms were tightly wrapped around my neck, lost in our kissing as I tried to navigate the both of us to the bed.
Finally managing to get through the doorway, I felt my knees touch the bed and lowered Santana down onto the mattress. Without breaking apart from the kiss, I crawled on top of her, keeping myself slotted between her thighs. The months of sexual frustration I had been trying to push aside while we had been together were starting to peak as the desire flooded by body. No matter how much I wanted this, I had been adamant to take things slow for Santana's sake.
I couldn't really remember my first time getting intimate with someone. It didn't matter to me at the time and I didn't feel anything about it. Not like now. Santana meant everything to me. I wanted her first time to be everything she had been waiting for. Not only that, but it was a first for me to. The first time I would be with someone in that way that I had feelings for. The first time I would be exploring this new side of my sexuality that I had only just discovered existed.
I inwardly groaned at myself, trying to figure out exactly when and how I became a better person, pulling reluctantly away from the kiss to hold myself up above Santana. Her hair was messy, cheeks flushed and her eyes were as hungry as I felt.
"Babe.. Are you sure? I don't wanna like… Rush you into this," I stammered, clearing my throat and trying my absolute best to see clearly.
Santana's hands moved from where they were reaching around my neck, to grasp at my shirt, her fingers pulling at the fabric as she nodded purposely, biting down on her lip. There was something about her now. A quiet confidence in who she was and what she wanted. I wasn't the only one that had changed drastically during our time together. Santana was a world away from the stuttering and anxious girl I had first met.
"Yes… I'm sure," Santana confirmed, shy but determined about her decision. "I want this.. And I want you,"
My stomach was in a flutter. I could hardly believe that this was happening, but I was so glad that it was. Everything we had been through had led to this. Every action, conversation and mistake that happened between us was climaxing in his moment. I tried to downplay it in my mind, knowing that this was an inevitability to happen eventually, but it was impossible. I was incredibly grateful and excited.. And for the first time in a long time - nervous.
Lowering myself back down against Santana's small frame, our lips met. Softly at first, but we soon fell back into pace. The feeling of her fingers tangling through my hair sent a shiver of desire through my body, her thighs hot where they squeezed at my hips. It only made me more hyper aware that her dress had ridden up to expose more of her beautiful skin.
Her hands moved from my hair, tentatively moving down my body in search of the hem of my shirt. She toyed with the fabric, seemingly a little unsure in how to move forward with what she wanted. Though her kisses were intoxicating, I still found myself attune to her thoughts. Santana was timid, her body shaking with the apprehension over taking the next step. Pulling myself up to sit back on my knees, I made quick work of my shirt, pulling it off over my head. Feeling my long hair drop back down over my shoulders, I watched how Santana's eyes flickered over my torso. It was a vision I could never imagine getting used to. A carnal need for me, from someone who was the smartest person that I knew. That truly meant the world.
"You're really beautiful, Britt.." Santana whispered, the awe overwriting the anxiety that had been creeping onto her face. Her eyes sparkled, wide as they drank me in. Though I wasn't even naked yet, nor had she seen any part of me that she hadn't already, she was appreciative. That was just one of many reasons why this was set apart from any other encounter that I had experienced with another person.
With a soft smile, I ran my hands up the outside of her thighs until they met the bunched hem of her dress. "Can I?" I asked gently, careful to note the small hesitation that crossed Santana's face. It was gone as quickly as it appeared, replaced with determination.
"Yes. Please,"
She supported her torso to help me as I peeled the dress up. Though more and more skin was getting exposed, I fought the urge to stare. Instead, I focused on my task, moving slowly and carefully to accommodate Santana. After she had worked her arms and head out of the garment, I threw it to join my shirt, finally allowing myself to look over her. With her silky hair fanned out below her, framing her flushed face and parted lips, my stomach lurched.
"Wow," was all I could manage to get out, my eyes slow on their mission to absorb all of her. From the softness of her stomach to the contrast of pale blue underwear against olive colored skin. It was an incredible thought that she wanted to be with me. She chose me above millions of other better people to give her heart and body to.
She giggled softly, making the move to reach up to my face and pull me back down, connecting our lips with one another. Swiping my tongue over her lip, I thought of all the times I had dreamed or fantasized about getting to be with Santana in this way. It had become an obsession to wake up in the mornings thinking about her, and how it would feel to have her in every possible way. I had never been good with using my words, but my actions could speak for themselves. If I could show her and pour every ounce of myself into being with her in this moment, then maybe she would truly understand how much I adored her.
I peppered kissed across her jaw to her neck, breathing in and allowing myself to get intoxicated by her scent. Sweet cherry blossom and vanilla tones flooded me as I kissed, savoring how she hummed below me. It was only when I found a spot against her throat when she let out a soft moan, the sound ringing in my ears like a siren's call.
Her hands began to fumble with my jeans and I kept my attention to her neck. I allowed her to work without the pressure, only stepping in to push down and kick them off when she was unable to do more. Her arms wrapped around me, keeping my close as her bare legs finally tangled together. It felt natural to be touching, my skin on fire yet bursting into goosebumps at every movement. The excitement of the embrace bubbling inside me. Her fingers started to trail over my sides and back and I gave my body to her.
The nerves and awkwardness had been thrown out of the room, giving way to the want that we both shared. My hips rolled doan against hers, met with likewise movements of eagerness. My body was burning but even still, hers felt warmer where we touched. Santana's grip was tight against my bicep, feeling how my muscles tensed with the strength I had to hold myself up above her. It was effortless for me, fueled by the sweet taste of her tongue against mine.
She slipped down the straps of my bra, the clasp following soon after. I welcomed her explorative touch, arching into her hands as they moved across my chest, the swell of my breasts. I moaned softly at the feeling of light fingertips brushing against my nipples. It was more than I could have ever imagined. Much more than I could have ever dreamed or deserved. She marvelled at my body, touching me as though I could break at any moment. She treasured every piece of me.
I was next to make my move, reaching behind her back to snap the clasp. She helped me work off the item, her shoulders curling as she looked up at me beneath those dark lidded eyes. My mouth curled into a soft smile, the palm of my hand falling delicately against her collarbone. She relaxed beneath me, nervous but not ashamed of her nudity. That was something I would vow that Santana should never feel. She was ethereal. Her visually flawless tanned skin felt like silk below my roughened fingertips. My very own treasure.
I kissed her softly, allowing my palm to glide over her skin. Her breasts were impossibly even softer and her body vibrated beneath mine at the touch. I gave into my desires, my lips moving from her lips to her neck, moving down further to drink up as much of her as I could. Her fingers threaded lightly through my hair, guiding me as I kissed, sampled and glided over her chest. I was overloaded with fulfilling desires I hadn't even known I possessed.
The trail of my lips was broken by the fabric of her underwear and my eyes flickered open, looking up at her to meet her gaze. She nodded and I wasted no time in peeling the material from her thighs. No amount of my imagination could have prepared me for the sight of her splayed out of my bed. A low breath escaped my lungs, my brain knocked off balance by the wonder that was Santana.
We had shifted, my back against the pillows as she straddled my lap. Our foreheads were resting together, a beautiful smile dancing on Santana's lips. It was a comfortable silence of gentle touches, chests brushing together, my lower stomach coiled in anticipation.
"You're so… Gorgeous," I whispered, breaking the soundtrack of our steady breathing. She brushed her nose against mine, tightening her arms around my neck in an attempt to keep my close.
"Just kiss me.."
Santana's wish was my command and with a tilt of my head, my lips were against hers. We were slow, shaking with the unspoken prelude to where we were heading. My hand travelled slowly between us, over the dip of her navel and between her thighs.
She whimpered against my lips at the touch, mirrored by my own gasp of marvel at the feel of her. She clung to me, rocking against my body in a wordless urge to go on. Though this was my first time, the only thing that was playing on my mind was Santana. Giving her everything she deserved and wanting to do right by her.
I swallowed every moan, moving with her as she chased her first taste of intimacy. She gripped at me, squeezing my shoulders as we moved together. Her noises were the sweetest sounds I had ever heard and I already knew that I would never grow tiresome. I wanted more and more - as much as she would be willing to give me. Nothing else in that moment mattered nearly as much as Santana did. The world could explode and burn around us and I wouldn't notice.
She started to shake, her kisses becoming more desperate and messy before she gave up entirely to set a preference to hide against my neck. Her hot, breathy panting caressed my neck and I held her against me. I couldn't help but voice my own pleasure, gently coaxing her into letting go.
When she did, every atom stopped. Her hips bucked against my hand, her body tense yet soft as she reached her apex. I followed her through gently, watching her throw her head back, eyes clenched shut. I couldn't have been more mistaken. This was far more beautiful than anything else I had ever seen. Santana was a Goddess.
With a breathless moan, Santana's eyes finally fluttered open to stare at me. Though she was in shock, her face was flushed and joyful. She was smiling, her lip pinched between her teeth to hold herself back from a grin. I smiled in response, heart aching with how fast it was pounding against my ribcage.
"I-... Woah," She panted, chest heaving and shining with miniscule beads of sweat. There was no trace of the anxiety or reservation that I had grown so accustomed to with Santana's persona. She was almost glowing, basking in the aftermath of pleasure.
"Was that… Okay?" I asked, the smallest hint of a smirk tugging at my lips with the shameless pride I felt by being the reason for her awe. To put it quite simply, I felt on top of the world.
"Oh yeah.. More than okay," She nodded, cupping my face with her hands, her thumb lightly tracing my lower lip. "That was amazing…. You're amazing,"
I chuckled lightly, basking in the light of this new-found confidence that was glowing from Santana. I was the reason for that, and no awards or achievements could ever come close to touching that.
"I know," I couldn't help but add with a flash of my teeth, causing Santana to laugh along with me, the palms of her hands hot against my shoulders.
"You're ridiculous," She smiled softly with a shake of her head. There was a glint in her eyes and before I had any time to question her, she was pushing me down against the pillows and kissing me.
When I stirred awake, I was pleased to see that it was still dark outside. Morning wasn't close to peaking, and I wasn't sure I ever wanted it to. Naked beneath my sheets, Santana's sleeping form was curled tightly against me. Her head was nestled into my shoulder, blissfully unaware of anything other than her dreams.
Santana wasn't my first kiss. She wasn't the first person I had been with in the most intimate way but she was the only one that mattered. My first love. I loved her above all else and I could perhaps never find the words to more accurately express the feelings inside of me when I thought about her.
"I love you,"
Though she was asleep, I needed to admit that. Even if it was just to myself. So much of my life was chaotic, but my future with Santana was bright. I knew that, as long as I had her in my corner, everything would turn out okay. She made me want to be a better person - the best version of myself. She had truly worked her way completely under my skin and into my soul. Her name was written all over my skin now, and I wouldn't know where I would be without her.
I felt her stir against me, her hand moving to lay against my chest and my heart skipped a beat. She nuzzled into me, finger tip gently tracing the shape of a heart against my skin.
"I love you, too,"
A/N: And that was a wild ride. I just want to say thank you for each and every single one of you that has stuck with me through this crazy journey. I am truly appreciative of all the love and support, and I hope you enjoyed it. I am currently in the process of editing this into a novel, so wish me luck!
And yes, there is a sequel planned! I hope to see you all there when we start that journey together. This isn't the end of their story AT ALL!
If you have any questions, queries, know more about the Sugar Rush novel or just wanna be friends, head on her to luthorquinzel on Tumblr and say hi!
You all have my heart. Thank you, thank you THANK YOU!
