Author Notes: This chapter introduces some concepts introduced in the Shinsetsu sequel so it might be weird to see them included.
As for the Hair Lords, they seem like the stereotypical weird characters, but they will prove to be a bigger threat soon enough.
Chapter 2: Bobo-Universe
As the group walked through the base, with several cylindrical buildings, Don Patch clung to Yuki, wearing lipstick and eyelash extensions.
"Oh me oh my. I hope that we don't run to any enemies. My manicure can't take it.," he said worryingly.
"Why is he acting that way?," asked Yuki.
She then saw Bobobo dressed up as a ufo inexplicably.
"There might be lunar aliens. Rabbits that will give us bamboo sticks and whack us with them.," he explained.
Yuki looked on in baffled silence.
Suddenly, from around a corner, six figures emerged-
A street bum with several hair tendrils emerging from his back, a narcissistic looking, sparkly blue eyed blond man wearing a suit with long eyelashes, a yeti with elongating foot hair, a brutish caveman with elongating arm hair, an earwig with elongating ear hair a donkey with elongating hair from its bottom and an old man in a martial arts gi with an elongating white beard.
Down on Luck Joe- The Commander of the Green Section.
Pretty Nice Guy Joe- The Commander of the Red Section.
Big-Feet Joe- The Commander of the Yellow Section.
Cave Joe- The Commander of the Orange Section.
Jackass Joe- The Commander of the Purple Section.
Old Joe- The Commander of the Indigo Section.
"Joe...Are they a family?," asked Yuki with a shocked looked as Don Patch looked exasperated in the distance.
"Bobobo, these are the Hair Lords. The top elites of Lunar Hair Kingdom base. Each one is stronger than the III with the Hair Ball. Be careful.," Hatenko said as he pulled out his keys.
Bobobo then grabbed Don Patch licking on a lolipop with a blissfully ignorant expression.
"Go beat on those lunar aliens!," he said as Don Patch was projected at the enemies yelping with a shocked expression.
"He just threw his friend.," Yuki said.
"Yup. That's how he is.," Soften replied, which made Yuki nervous.
"They're just a bunch of yuppies. They won't take me seriously.," Don Patch said with confidence.
"Super Fist of the Eyelashes- Eyelash Alley.," said the pretty boy as his eyelashes divided into countless tendrils and struck at Don Patch.
"Super Fist of the Backhair- Backhair Alley.," said the bum as his backhair split into tendrils as they hit Don Patch repeatedly.
"Super Fist of the Foothair- Foothair Alley.," said the yeti as his foothair spread into countless tendrils that whipped Don Patch endlessly.
"Super Fist of the Armhair- Armhair Alley.," said the caveman as his armhairs branched into tendrils to strike at Don Patch.
"Super Fist of the Asshair- Asshair Alley.," said the donkey as his bottom hairs struck at Don Patch continuously.
"Super Fist of the Beard-," said the old man with the white beard shot into the ground.
Bobobo looks ominously in Jelly Jiggler's direction, who begins to shiver nervously as he slowly backs away.
"Streaming White Dragon."
Bobobo is then hit by a torrent of beard hair in the shape of a dragon.
Jelly Jiggler takes a sigh of relief as he sits on a lounge chair.
I was brought back to be a punch line. No more, I will show them my new and improved Mega Fist...Just like my teacher taught me..., thought Jiggler as he thought back to his training...
Jelly Jiggler's Past...
Jelly Jiggler in a supermarket was having food dye forced down his throat by the exasperated employees for several hours now.
Suddenly, they stopped as they began to eat him...And actually enjoying it for once.
Jelly's eyes watered as he felt pleasure for being eaten and being the number one choice for selling.
Which led to him being sold as a mass-production for a merchandising franchise...
Present
"It was hard, but now I can safely saw I'm the most delightful thing to eat in the universe. Take this! Mega Fist of the Wobble Wobble! Bit Size Me!," Jelly said as he shot out bits of himself into the Hair Lords' mouths.
They chewed...and then gave blasé expressions as they picked their noses with glazed looks in their eyes.
"Kinda meh.," said Jackass Joe as he picked his nose.
Jelly Jiggler devastated, fell to his knees and cried.
"Guess I'm not number one.," he yelled.
Bobobo then appeared as Bobobo headed rocket and landed on Jelly Jiggler.
"You use the Forgotten Fists of the Hair Branches?!," Bobobo shouted.
"Yes, we're survivors of the Hair Kingdom sent to space to avoid the purge. Now we rule with Bababa Baba-Ba-bababa as our redeemer as he will conquer Earth and then the rest of the universe.," said Pretty Nice Guy Joe with sparkles in his eyes as Don Patch laid down as a burnt piece of toast.
"Super Fist of Wiggin Out! Eye Pocky!," Bobobo said he jabbed the pretty boy's eyes as the man rolled on the ground in pain.
"It doesn't matter what you plan to do. The world and the universe belongs to everyone and not for just one person. I'll show you Super Ultimate Fist of Nosehair: Bobo-Cosmos! A Super-D-Duper version of Bobo-World!," Bobobo said as the realm changed into a large cosmic space with several wacky and silly looking faces on planets.
"A Hair Kingdom Heir World technique?! You must be Bobobo Bobo Bo-bobo!," said Old Joe as he stared in awe.
"First we're going down the Milky Way!," Bobobo said as the group then slid down a stream of milk as they were kicked by giant cows. Don Patch, Pickles and Jelly Jiggler got the worst of the beatings, followed by Pretty Nice Guy Joe.
"Then we go to Andromeda!," Bobobo said as they entered an an apartment where an angry house wife hit everyone with a rolling pin, with several of the Hair Lords succumbing to the blows...along with Don Patch and Gaoh.
"Then we got to Betelgeuse!," Bobobo said they entered a convenience store where they arrived in an aisle where giant beetles were buying orange juice. The shop clerk then kicked the group out violently.
"Then we got to Sirius!," Bobobo said as the group were viciously attacked by alien dogs, but Don Patch and Jelly Jiggler got the worst of it.
"Now, we're in a Black Hole!," Bobobob said as everyone was sucked into a blackhole.
"And now the finisher, we're gonna do a Big Bang! Birth of a Nosehair universe!," Bobobo said as a large explosion led to several planets and galaxies being formed as they attacked with nosehairs at the Hair Lords.
"Super Fist of Armhair- Armhair Barrier.," said Cave-Joe as he generated a hair barrier to block the attacks.
"Bobobo! Let's split up and defeat these enemies on our own!," said Bobobo to himself.
"Good idea! Wait?!...Why is there another me?!," Bobobo said as he punched the imposter, who revealed himself to be a darkened, black-afroed version of himself.
"Black Bobobo!," Bobobo said in shock as he saw a black outfit wearing Beauty and a pile of bones sitting in a pair of trashcans.
"Where's Hiragi-," Bobobo asked.
"We ate him.," Jati said curtly.
"Good that you're here! We need all the help we can get to defeat these guys!," Bobobo said as he flung Jati at the Hair Lords.
"You prick!," she yelled.
I'm sorry Jati! You're a Beauty! And that makes it so hard!, thought Bobobo.
"You're the worst. Super Fist of the Cold Straight- Sub-Zero Sane!," Jati said as she slapped Pretty Nice Guy Joe.
"You're a bad bishonen ripoff. You're lame.," she said, which caused Pretty Nice Guy Joe to freeze over in shame.
"That's the punchline.," Jati said before Jelly threw her into a basketball hoop.
"Now we can deal with these five now!," said Bobobo as he wore a turtleneck sweater.
Next Chapter: BoboPick.
