Chapter 13 (Kumiko)
Thirty years later…
Life fucking hated me.
These were the words I repeated in my head ever since my daughter had decided to join the Gotei. It was what I told myself now as I stared at her transfer request file. I had gone through thousands of the these over the years, and recognized a few faces from my childhood and from the Rukon. But none of them held the same weight that hers did.
Yumichika sat before me now, his brow nearly as furrowed as mine, "So…what—"
"If you ask what I'm going to do now, I'm going to hit you over the head with a brick."
"You say that and yet the worse you could do with your arsenal of paperwork is a papercut."
Despite myself, I chuckled. Yumi's sarcasm was a Godsent, especially at times like this when I need it most.
I set the folder down. She had done exceptionally well, better than me. She excelled in Kido—which came as no surprise since it seemed to be a family trait—and had been in the Top Five percentile of her zanjutsu combat classes. Her hand-to-hand combat was the lowest score, but she had still had a high enough grade to land a spot in a specialized division like Squad Two.
A good number of students graduated like this and so it wouldn't have stressed me as much had it not been for the fact that she had achieved her Shikai. This, along with the families she came from, made her a shoe-in for any Squad. Squad Eight and Squad Two were particularly interested in her, which raised some suspicions. What had she done to catch their eye? I had already fended off the other fourth-seated officers who wanted her for their captains, but it wouldn't be for very long.
"What am I going to do?" I groaned as I rested my head on my desk.
"That's what I was saying!"
Ikkaku, who had been standing quietly until now, came to Yumichika's side, "Is there nothing your family can do?"
It was hilarious that they suggested it. Growing up in the Rukon had taught me that they all hated nothing more than someone who got a free pass in life. It was why I dreaded the option of pulling my family ties to keep Shizuko safe. But it seemed to be the only option I had.
"I'll be back," I picked up her file and headed to Squad Six.
"How have you been, cousin?"
Byakuya looked up at me with a disdainful look. He glanced at the squad member that was standing next to me—the one who was supposed to stop me from disturbing him. I walked into the room and knelt beside him. He calmly poured me a cup of tea.
"What are you doing here?" He asked, dismissing his subordinate with a flick of his fingers.
I passed him Shizuko's file. He leafed through it while I spoke, "I need to know that she'll go to a good squad—"
"You want her to go to a squad where you can control what missions she's sent on."
I nodded, "Yes. So that means she goes to Squad Eleven or Squad Six."
"Why would I want her in my squad?" He asked like he hadn't just read her file. "This is between your daughter and yourself—speak to her about putting a request to Squad Eleven."
"You know how wilful she is, Byakuya. She does what she wants—and I need to know that she's safe," I gritted it out, "I didn't sign my soul over to Central Forty-Six just to have her go and get herself killed by some Hollow."
"You underestimate her—"
"Am I? How would you know? You haven't reached out to us in decades, Byakuya," When he said nothing, I moved closer to him. I was desperate for him to help me, and he could see, "Please, Byakuya."
"It's immoral—"
"Was it immoral when you pulled strings to keep Rukia safe?" His eyes widened a fraction and I sat back in my seat, "We all know what you did. A girl like her doesn't end up in a Squad with no rank. Not with her abilities and especially with her noble affiliation."
"She won't accept my transfer."
"I'll make her—"
"The last time her family manipulated her did not go well for any of us," He noted, "I'm afraid that your daughter no longer has the faith in me that she once had."
"Maybe this would be the prime opportunity to restore it."
I stood up and left her file with him. He said nothing and I suspected that his grief had paralyzed him. I know mine still did.
In many ways I could understand why Byakuya had become the way he had. I had become bitter since Kisuke left, but at least he was still alive. I couldn't imagine the devastation I would feel if I ever found out that he was dead. Byakuya knew that kind of grief, and it was only natural that he had become distant to the world.
So when I went to the office the next day and found that Squad Six had put in a request for Shizuko, alongside my squad and Squad Two, I felt a weight lift off my chest.
"You're welcome," Yumichika said as he peered over my shoulder.
I swatted him away but couldn't wipe the smile that spread across my face. Just then, Shizuko came through.
She was a vision of beauty. Like all graduates, she wore a black, unmarked Shihakusho. They ran around the Seireitei and did small jobs for each Squad, in order to get a feel for how each Squad ran.
Her hair was pulled back into an elegant, blond bun. She looked like a doll, with her bright blue eyes and rosy, freckled cheeks. My mother and I always teased her for how the boys all drooled when she walked past, but I was filled with so much pride for my girl. She was everything I had imagined her to be, and so much more.
The only flaw was her ability to drive me up the wall with her defiant wilfulness. If I had it my way, she would have stayed out of harm's way. But she was like her father—someone who wasn't so easily bossed around, especially by me.
"Hey, Yumi," She waved. Yumichika and Ikkaku were like uncles to her, as they had joined the squad around the time she was six and my mother would take her up to the Seireitei to visit me.
"What's up, my sweet?" I braced myself on my elbows. She passed me a form that turned out to be the same one I had just been reading to Yumichika a few minutes earlier. "These are the squads who've placed an interest in you?"
"Interesting how two of the three are family," She had raised a brow at me but it didn't work. I had a master pokerface and I'd be damned if my daughter saw through it.
"Well, it's only natural I would put in a request," I grinned, "You would fit quite well in this Squad—and you'll be close to your old mom."
"Plus, we need more femininity," Yumichika pitched in, "Your mother isn't quite making the cut. However, your beauty may just compliment mine—"
"And you're a brilliant fighter, Shizuko. Why would you waste your talents at a place like Squad Two? They're a bunch of snakes."
"My father was from Squad Two though…"
I cleared my throat, "Do I really need to say anymore? Besides, your father transferred to another squad. Is there anything else I need to add, Yumichika?"
While he prattled to Shizuko in what was a surprisingly excellent sales pitch, I tried to even my breathing. How had she found out what squad Kisuke had been in before Squad Twelve?
Although I knew that she was old enough to handle much of the truth, I still worried about her finding out. She thought so highly of him, despite him leaving us here, and I didn't want to taint that. She was so much like Kisuke and she had recognized that in herself—wouldn't finding out the truth behind his disappearance harm her more than anything else? I didn't want her looking in the mirror and realizing that she looked a lot like a man who was questionably a monster.
Most in the Soul Society had pieced together that Shizuko was Kisuke's child. The resemblance in not only their looks but the raw power and brains was too obvious to ignore. Perhaps it had slipped from one of them.
Turning back to the conversation, I took control of the direction again, "What about Squad Six?"
"What about it?" She asked quietly.
"Have you thought about joining it?" I sighed when she didn't answer, "Shizuko, it's been years. Surely you can put behind what happened between you and Byakuya?"
"It's not that simple," She gritted out, "He's a coward. He let them ruin my reputation as a geisha—I was married because of him! How could I ever forgive that? Why would I ever forgive that?"
"Because he's family," I said simply. She only stared at me with those blazing, blue eyes and I was reminded that not everything about her was like Kisuke. "I know that I haven't set a great example of forgiving. I will never forget the suffering that your father's actions have caused us—but I have forgiven him, Shizuko."
"I can't forgive him," She whispered. I wasn't sure if she meant Byakuya or Kisuke. I'm quite sure that she didn't know either.
"You'll have to eventually. We live too long to hold grudges."
She finally sat down and I took another look at the form. After much discussion, she decided to put in a transfer to Squad Eleven. I wasn't going to complain, though I knew she only chose it because she was hiding from Byakuya and knew joining Squad Two would not sit well with me. I could say that I felt guilty but I didn't. I knew the kind of heartless shits that came from Squad Two—I refused to have my daughter become one of them.
As she prepared to leave with the transfer form I had filled out for her, I grabbed her hand, "Shizuko."
She looked up at me as I came around to her side of the table, "Yeah?"
"I'm so proud of you," I kissed her on the crown of her head. She wrapped her arms around me and I hugged her tightly, "You've accomplished so much in such a short time—and I don't want you to ever think that anyone can take that away."
"I love you," Her voice was muffled because she had buried her face into my uniform.
"I love you…" I paused after a moment and said hesitantly, "He would be proud of you too."
She looked up at me with wide eyes, "Kisuke?"
I nodded, "If you want…I could—I could take you to meet him."
The silence from her was like a tidal wave of emotions—profound and powerful. I watched as her eyes grew bright, just like they had when she became a geisha or stared at her zanpakuto for the first time. This had been something that she had wanted for so long, and after decades of denying her, I finally saw how much this meant to her.
So it surprised me when she shook her head, "No. It's alright."
I stumbled over myself, "Are—are you sure?"
She took her forms from my hands and smiled, "I don't want to be disappointed. And that's what he'll do when I meet him—the man who gave up on me before I had even been born."
She left before I could correct her. And for the first time, I was riddled with the most crippling guilt I had felt. I had slowly given her bits and pieces of the past, but I had denied her the truth that had mattered the most. The truth that Kisuke had never willingly given her up—because he never knew that she had existed.
I was so busy convincing her that he wasn't worth her time or effort that I had ignored that she might feel that she wasn't worth his time or effort.
WELP
It took us a while, my friends, but we finally hit the point where the time lapse has taken a pause. Thank you for being patient and keeping up with the fast-paced chapters!
Also glad to hear from our dear Kumi-kun lol
I hope you enjoyed the update! I'll see you all again February 16th!
To any of my Americans, happy SuperBowl! *cough* go forty-niners *cough*
