The Sky Is Empty
After Father Morton's sermon at Mass, Jean spent all of Sunday thinking about the nature of sin. That story he told about adultery, about posing as a perfect housewife and Christian while sinning in private. Jean, of course, could not identify with that. Adultery was not a sin she herself had ever engaged in.
But she was not above reproach. She held her head high and went through her life proud of who she was and secure in the fact that she was an upstanding woman. And for the most part, that was correct. That pride, though, was the downfall of far too many. Sitting in Mass and hearing Father Morton talk about adultery, thinking all the while that she was so much better than the woman in his story, that was prideful.
On Monday morning, first thing after breakfast, she walked to Sacred Heart to give confession. It had been so long since she had done so, she did not quite recall what her last confession had been. There had been a time when she went to confession every two weeks. But life had not allowed time for such rigidity anymore. Life with Lucien was far too unpredictable for her to attend church other than for Mass each week. And even then, she was not as regular about it as she had once been.
Life with Lucien. That had certainly made her prideful. It had taken her quite a while to be proud of him. He was drunk and foolish and erratic and selfish, and the things he'd done to ruin his reputation and that of his father's had wounded her to the core. But he had softened. He had learned. And Jean had gotten to know him. He was no longer a source of shame for her but now a source of pride. He was a good man, her employer. He was a good man with an important job and Ballarat had grown to respect him, if somewhat reluctantly. And he had instilled pride in her. He had included her in his work, asking her advice and her assistance. And she was proud to provide it. She was proud to be a part of all that he did.
Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.
It was right there in the bible to taunt her. Jean sighed as she approached the church with its imposing edifice. It was certainly time for her to go to confession.
