Author Note
Oh...It has been long...long time since I updated something and ironically the last thing I updated is the first thing I am updating now. This chapter didn't go as I want mostly, for I wanted it to be full of fun and remarkably light but I couldn't get away from the drama. The coming few chapters will be tragic, though and I am slightly debating on changing the rate of some coming chapters to M because of reasons, I will mention later.
By the way, this is my longest written fiction till now. Seven chapters. Not much but good enough for the time being! Anyway, please enjoy and review because I felt quite depressed at the reviews rate last chapter*wailing like a baby*
If you liked the chapter, it will be nice to tell me and if you don't, it would be nicer to drop by and tell me why..^.^..
Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon.
Kowarete Ita Nani No Tame Ni
Chapter Seven
Friends, huh?
Diving in the changing atmosphere of the fantasy world was one of the few things he managed to feel happy around or rather to feel himself in. The startling truths in the novel he continued reading an hour ago (he wanted to finish reading it last night but couldn't resist sleeping any longer)alarmed him as he jumped literary because of the voices of a quarrel downstairs. He laughed at himself inwardly as his loss in the story distanced him from reality to the extent that he thought the fight in the novel had transferred physically around him. He closed the book, memorizing the page number he was currently in. It wouldn't be polite to mark the page in a book he doesn't own anyway. Stepping slowly out of his bed, he walked towards the door, shrugging off the slight headache he felt.
'Damn it. Come back here bakaa!'
'I am dead both ways so why should I ? '
Kouichi blinked at the voices which started to come closer to the room. He could easily recognize Kouji's threatening voice but he was fairly sure that he never heard the other voice before. The quarrel seemed less serious than the one he used to hear between Kouji and his father…their father… yet that didn't stop his worry of what was coming as hurried footsteps approached his room; Kouji's room. It was not his. He was a visitor or a guest here and that was more than what he could dream of.
The strange movement of the door's knuckle told him that someone was trying to open it. His breaths grow heavier as the door started to open slowly. No matter how unreasonable his fear was, he couldn't get rid of it. There was nothing to be afraid of inside the Minamoto household yet he was terrified.
'Hey there!' the new figure said cheerfully but didn't give him a chance to answer as he closed the door behind him and grinned at the room's keys on the desk.
'Found it!' he breathed in relief before running towards the desk, grabbing the keys and closing the door in less than a minute. He sighed before smiling nervously at Kouichi's blank stares. 'Oh sorry about that, buddy. Kouji can be really our of control when he is angry. That will give him some time to cool down.'
The voice of Kouji's fists knocking on the door angrily made him laugh more nervously,' And I don't think that will happen soon.'
Kouichi looked at the brown-haired guy before taking a step back. The guy rubbed his hair shamefully and apologized.'Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you.'He grinned widely. 'I am Kanabra Takuya and you must be Kouichi, ne? It is nice to meet you.'
The other didn't seem that threatening anyway. He had become really good in feeling how dangerous or bad the people around him. 'But h-how?'
'Kouji told me of course. I can't believe how you look like him.' Kouichi bowed slightly despite knowing that there was no need to be so formal.
Takuya gasped as he came closer, eyes examining Kouichi's face carefully, causing the other to blush and look at the floor.
'Man, you are really shy. You look just like how he described you. Polite and shy and really cute.'
Kouichi's face grew redder as he shifted in his place uncomfortably under the other's eyes who grinned evilly, 'If the girls are going crazy over Kouji in his cold character. What the heck are they going to do if they saw you?'he took few steps towards the nervous boy. It was rather strange and funny to see someone with Kouji's face yet completely different especially someone as nice and innocent as Kouichi looked to him. Despite what Kouji had told him about his new brother, Takuya hadn't get the whole image of Kouji's words. He pointed out. 'I got an idea. Do you like taking a picture?'
'E-Excuse m-me?'
'A picture and as no one knows that Kouji has a twin. they would think he had cut his hair and looked suddenly more innocent than he could ever be.'
'Open the door, idiot! I will kill you, Takuya!'Kouji's murdering voice increased in the volume as he continued hitting the door, ready to break it.
Takuya sat on the carpet in hopelessness. 'He is gonna kill me.'
Kouichi blinked. 'W-why?'
Takuya raised his head and looked at his confused face before muttering to himself in what looked like a drowning person who is clutching a straw's look.'Maybe I am not dead! I know what I should do.' He stood suddenly and grabbed Kouichi's shoulder then stood behind him, making Kouichi completely nervous and speechless. Takuya comforted. 'Calm down. It is all right. He would never hurt me like this.' Receiving a raised eyebrow from a very clueless Kouichi, Takuya explained hurriedly. 'All what you have to do is to stand here. He won't hit me this way.'
'But. I don't understand Kanabra-kun.'
Takuya giggled at the formal way Kouichi called him with.'Oh come on. Call me Takuya and you don't really have to understand.' The hitting on the door stopped as Takuya wondered about the reason before stepping from behind Kouichi and standing in front of him.
It had been like the silence before a storm. Takuya waited impatiently and Kouichi wondered mentally what kind of people Kouji bring home. Takuya didn't seem crazy but he sounded far cheerful for someone who was going to be slaughtered. The brief period he barely knew Kouji in, he understood how dangerous it was to make him angry or to annoy him and Takuya's character was completely different from his brother's so how would these two be friends? He didn't feel that he was ridiculously jumping to the conclusion of them being friends but if Kouji had told Takuya about him then they were friends or close enough to that level.
He looked at Takuya's sweated face and sighed mentally, knowing that if this guy was the one Kouji talked about with the girl he called yesterday then he would be in trouble. There was no point in walking into a fight between Kouji and his friend but what choice did he have? The deadly silence ended with a low click, declaring the opened door. Kouji stepped in the room, smirking in not so happy face and stuffed the keys in his pocket. Takuya resorted behind his safe shelter and asked in annoyance.'From where did you get those keys?'
Kouji frowned.'This is my room. Of course I have additional keys somewhere out.'He narrowed his eyes when he saw Kouichi's troubled face between them. 'Now let's talk outside.'
'No way.'Takuya shouted, gripping Kouichi's shoulders tightly and addressing the younger twin.'You are gonna kill me. I know that for sure.'
'Because you deserve that, goggle head and leave him alone.'
'Don't wanna!' Takuya sang childishly and teased. 'You can't hurt him to get me, ne?'
Kouji gritted his teeth. 'I said leave him now,Kanabara.'
'No.'
Kouichi who felt completely out of place released himself simply from Takuya's grip, leaving a baffled Takuya and disbelieved Kouji before sitting on the edge of his bed silently and looked at Kouji questioningly. He wasn't the type to interfere in fights or to bear watching them even if they were like children's bickering just like now. It was hard to hide the surprised look he had once he saw Kouji stifling a laugh at Takuya's misfortune.
'Fine but you won't kill me in front of him and I am not leaving.'Takuya sat crossed legged on the floor and challenged Kouji.
'If you are so afraid of me then why did you send that message using my name?'Kouji crossed his arms in annoyance.
'Because you can be a jerk. All those girls who send you an admiration letter are heart-broken because of you so I figured out that it won't hurt anyone to simply reply to one of them.'
'And to tell the girl whom I don't even remember her face that she is pretty but not my type.'
'Well this is the less you owe them. What is the problem in soft words?'
'And you are someone to talk. Shouldn't you stop being annoying to the girl you love.'
Takuya blushed madly and roared. 'Shut up,Kouji. I told you Izumi is just a friend.'
Kouji smirked and leaned against the wall, raising an amused eyebrow.'Who talked about Izumi?'Take this goggle-head...
Takuya groaned and looked away, failing to hide the embarrassed blush. 'That was supposed to be my revenge for telling her about the book and the CD.'
'The revenge which you are going to apologize for once we are back to school.'
'Never.'
'You don't have any other choice, Takuya. I can't stand letting that girl think it was me who replied to her love letter besides how could you sent the message to her if there was no school?'
'Easy. She came to the training to see you despite knowing you aren't even a member of the team.'
'Excuse me...'
It took a whole two minutes for both of them to remember Kouichi's presence. Kouji coughed to clear his throat, mumbling a hurried sorry before gripping Takuya's arm to drag him outside. The brunt protested hotly, clutching the carpet with his nails like a kitty, driving his friend crazy.
That was different. It wasn't the personality Kouji had around him but how on earth could he deal with him in the same way he was dealing with his friend? The memory of Kouji's harsh way in dealing with his own parents had led him to the realization that Kouji was cold-hearted person but…
'I said stand up, Takuya. We have a damn project to work for before the end of vacation.'
'I deserve few minutes break, for God's sake, Kouji!'Takuya whined then glared at Kouichi as if asking for help.
'Damn it! You can get your free time outside!'
'But I want to know more about Kouichi!'Takuya shot back.
Awkward silence embraced them. Kouji looked at his brother who refused to meet their eyes before shifting his gaze to the floor, murmuring in a calmer voice. 'Not now, Takuya.'
Takuya sighed in frustration and sat up, rubbing his head awkwardly. 'I am sorry. Didn't want to be too annoying.'
'I-It's O-Okay.'
The two friends gaze moved to the raven haired boy who was playing with finger in nervousness. ' It was nice to meet you.'
A proud smile lit Takuya's face as he poked Kouji in the arm. 'I told you. You shouldn't prevent me from meeting him.'
Kouji looked away and muttered in deep concern. 'He was sick.'
'But he looks good to me.'
'Whatever. I will bring our notebooks here. We might finish the project here in case he didn't mind.'
Kouichi nodded a bit enthusiastically as Kouji left the room silently. Takuya walked towards him on the edge of the bed, smiling encouragingly.'He really cares about you.'
Kouichi raised his head.'Kouji?'
'Yeah. I have always wanted to meet you, you know. I mean you are the only one who managed to puzzle him. He is really confused when it comes to you. But you mean a lot to him…You gave him hope to be himself gradually. I admit that I changed him but it took months to befriend him and believe me, I don't know if I succeeded in being real friends with him. He is quite secretive about his feelings but I assure you…he wants to be a good brother more than you think.'
Takuya's words were so sincere that he couldn't help but believe them. Kouji was a source of fear to him…Despite the two sweet dreams he had about Kouji being nice to him which part of him begged to believe in their reality. The cold shiver shook his frail body as his eyes dared to control few tears while looking at the ground. It hurt to have a caring brother as much as it hurt to be with someone who didn't want him. He was scared to believe in the brightness of his coming days despite his heart's plead to forget the painful past and turn a new page.
However, believing in the future means clutching with a hope that was much ruthless than the scary wind outside. The reason he kept living for was his hope of a better life and when that life became ready to use colors in them, he was terrified of collapsing all over again. He had never imagined a whole family even in his wildest dreams. He wished he could have someone who cares a bit about him…who would give him a dignity life and normal circumstances but now and out of no where…he had a rich father, a good, nice woman as a foster mother, a brother who is trying to be nice to him and even a cheerful guy who wants to be his friend after few minutes of seeing him.
It was simply too much for him.
And that scared him more than those deadly sleeping pills.
'Anno!Kouichi! I mean Kouichi-kun. Are you okay?' Takuya's hand waved in front of his blank face as the sound of a thud awoke him from his wonder. He blinked weakly, feeling himself about to faint because of the rushing blood to his heart suddenly. Once his thoughts re-organized themselves, he found himself under the gazes of the other two. Takuya's face was full of nervous confusion unlike Kouji's who was stricken with worry. He shook his head to clear his mind, feeling the red color on his cheeks before smiling tiredly.'I am sorry. I am fine.'
An identical sigh escaped both of them as Takuya's gasp followed his previous sigh.'Kouji?'
Kouji's grip refused to leave Takuya's collar as he hissed dangerously, momentarily forgetting Kouichi's presence. 'What the hell have you done to him?'
'I didn't do anything. I swear. He just spaced out suddenly. I freaked out too!'Takuya fought to breath for few seconds before Kouji let go of his collar, leaving him to cough violently. 'What had I done to deserve this, Kouji?'
'Oh Shut up!'
A small smile covered Kouichi dizzy face. It was surprising to see Kouji apparently caring but he couldn't ignore how shameful he felt for spacing out and freaking the poor Takuya, leading him to earn a scolding anger. He had been supposed to defend Takuya and to apologize for causing trouble but he couldn't stop his heart from being slightly happy at being under the pure worry of the strangers who are starting to deserve places in his heart. Kouji will always remain an enigma for him but for the time being, he could enjoy seeing Kouji's real personality around him and others.
'So, Kouichi, Do you like to play some video games? We can finish the project later. We have plenty of time.'
'I-I don't know any video games.'Kouichi apologized shyly.
'You don't have to know them actually. I can teach you how to play some, right Kouji?'
Kouji ran a hand through his hair, shooting Takuya a death glare and mumbling his agreement.
'But, before playing. Do you really know five languages including Italian?'
Another death glare fired towards Takuya but he ignored it and focused on the embarrassed eyes of Kouichi who gave a small nod.
'Izumi will like talking to you. She is already bugging me what kind of person you are.'
Kouichi raised his head towards him, questioningly. 'The girl who owns that book.'
A grin answered him.'Yep. I hardly managed to survive her anger because of that book.' He paused then added to himself, 'Let's hope, she would forget about making me apologize in front of the whole class. That is embarrassing!'
'You deserve that!'
'Just stay out of the problem, Kouji!'
'After you put the book in my backbag, forget it. And if she forgave you, I won't.' A smirk annoyed Takuya despite how clear it was that its aim was to lighten the mood as well.
'Anyway. Kouji, Could you bring us some cookies. Minamoto-san had made some before leaving, right?'
Kouji groaned and rolled his eyes. 'Help yourself!'
Takuya pouted and turned to Kouichi who was left out of their conversation and smiled at him. 'I'd like us to be friends, Kouichi. In case this idiot did anything wrong this time, you can always tell me.'
'Hey!'
Kouji's flushed protest died quickly as another strange silence sealed the atmosphere. Kouji kept his gaze away from his twin. He knew that Takuya was trying to help them to be closer but he couldn't lead himself to take any meaningful steps. Heck, he didn't even ask Kouichi to sleep last night when he kept reading till after midnight and he was thankful that Kouichi wasn't a light sleeper or else Kouichi would see him, covering him with the blanket and putting the book on the side table when he slept. Sighing mentally, he wished he could have Takuya's courage to correct his mistakes or to apologize for them. His father hadn't returned from Tokyo yet and Satomi was spending longer time outside as if avoiding him. Was it a bit hectic for his best friend to ask for his vulnerable brother's friendship he didn't know. From the corner of his eye, he saw Kouichi's painful expressions at the request. He exchanged a look with Takuya who was taken aback by the odd reaction.
'Kouichi?'It was Kouji who dared to call him, feeling the other's internal turmoil. He bit his lip as Takuya's apologetic look torn him. Maybe it had been too irresponsible to take such a step.
A Friend?
Kouichi could hardly stifle a hysteric laugh, fearing it would turn into a broken cry. His tears mesmerized in his eyes as he bit his lower lips harder…He never had someone who he was able to call a friend.
No…He had but he simply lost whenever he felt close to them till he gave up trying to accept someone else…not that someone had ever tried so hard to befriend him. It was life. Always taking those he loved and cared about so maybe it would be wrong to accept this chance. A friend was supposed to mend his broken heart, to give him a life but he was fearful that his already broken hurt would be completely devastated this time. He wished to scream. Maybe to let them feel his pain…his fear but his shaky, shallow breaths and cold shivers paralyzed him from responding that begging scream or to even react to Kouji's shake and Takuya's frantic calls of his name.
He really wanted someone he can trust but that one is Kouji's friend so losing this new life means losing someone else outside this small family. In front of the outer world, he and Kouji weren't brothers so what right did he have to interfere more in Kouji's personal life? But the brown haired guy: Takuya, he reminded himself of the brunette's name, didn't ask for his friendship in a matter of pity or sympathy. So a chance wouldn't hurt but it might kill him in the end and he had lost enough. His head hurt and the dizziness feeling overcame him as his body gave up gradually. It was a shame how weak his body and soul were. Whenever he was lost, his body would react physically as well as emotionally. He had to be strong if he wanted to be normal and to give his heart and body some time to recover.
'Kouichi?'The cry was more tense and the shaking grow till it painfully hurt him. He forced his eyelids to response shakily.
Kouji's face hovered over him in deep worry and a badly hidden fear before it calmed in relief once seeing him back to consciousness. He helped him to lye down on the bed. He sighed and looked at Takuya apologetically before addressing his sick brother calmly. 'You'd better get some sleep.'
He pulled the blanket tightly over Kouichi and offered a small smile.' It will be fine.'
Kouichi nodded and looked at Takuya who was now watching the carpet absentmindedly. 'G-Gomen.'
Takuya barely nodded at the whispered apologize before standing up and collecting the notebooks, Kouji had thrown them on the floor minutes ago then ran downstairs in few seconds, slamming the door shut with a loud 'bang'.
Kouichi's tears broke free at the scene of his supposed new friend. He had hurt someone who he was supposed to be in his dept for asking for his friendship. He had simply troubled him and turned that cheerful personality to a guilty one. Takuya wanted to help but he was too scared to accept this opportunity.
It is my fault. I hurt him because I am a coward.
'It is not your fault!
His eyes widened at Kouji's ability to understand his thoughts.'Takuya would understand that you need some time.'
He sat up and walked towards the door. Kouji turned to look at him in sympathy and controlled calmness. 'All of us need time. But at least you know he will be always here when you need him.'
Kouichi raised his spinning head from the pillow weakly, begging Kouji silently to look at him directly. His voice trembled. A-And y-you?' He took a shaky breath and added painfully. 'Will y-you...be...here if I..n-needed...y-you?
Kouji breathed heavily, closed his eyes and reopened them slowly to look at the other's tearful face softly. He murmured gently. 'I will.'
To Be continued
