Beware: Puns and dad jokes. Puns and dad jokes everywhere.
June 8, 1874
The next few days were filled with awkward tension between Sweeney and Johanna. Both of them were still uneasy around each other, but Sweeney had been attempting to work up the nerve to connect with her.
It was an unexpected joke that ended up bringing them together.
After the shops closed for the night, they were all gathered in Mrs Lovett's parlor, where a nice fire had been built in the fireplace. Mrs Lovett and Toby were on the floor, working on writing lessons, while Anthony sat nearby and watched them.
"Does 'necessary' have 2 c's, or three?" Toby asked.
"Two, I think." Mrs Lovett responded. "Maybe one?"
"I think it's just one." Johanna interjected from her space on the sofa.
"I've seen it spelled with two." Anthony added.
"Nuh-uh." Toby made a face.
"Does anybody want to look it up?" Mrs Lovett asked. "There's a dictionary on that shelf over there." She pointed.
"I'll do it." Johanna got up off the couch and walked over to the shelf. "Dictionary..." She spotted the book, pulled it off the shelf, and flipped through it until she found what she was looking for. "Here we go, 'necessary'."
She brought the book over and set it down in front of Mrs Lovett.
"Oh! You were right." The baker's eyebrows rose in surprise.
"Yeah, it's just got one c."
There was a brief lull as Mrs Lovett instructed Toby to write the word.
"I guess you didn't 'C' that one coming."
Everyone turned around, startled. Sweeney was perched on a chair near the back of the room with that day's newspaper and a straight face.
"That was a good pun." Johanna congratulated.
"There's plenty more where that came from." He smirked. "I guess you could say I have a 'pun'-tiful supply."
A wide grin broke out across Johanna's face as she stifled a laugh.
"That was bad." Mrs Lovett let her face fall into her palm.
"I'll admit, that wasn't one of my best." Sweeney folded his newspaper and placed it on his lap. "What can I say? It's late."
"It's never too late for puns." Johanna responded.
"You're right. I just hope I don't 'pun' out." He grinned.
"Stop." Mrs Lovett cringed. "Your puns are terrible. Half of them don't even make sense. I'm not even sure most of them even qualify as puns."
"Really? I guess the fact that I keep making them proves that this is news to me." Sweeney held up his newspaper. Johanna started to laugh.
"I'm leaving." Mrs Lovett got up and left the room. "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the kitchen."
"We'll try not to cook up any mischief while you're gone!" Johanna called after her.
"Ugh!"
"Now that's what I call a pun." Sweeney looked proudly at his daughter. "That was good. I'm impressed."
"Funny, you don't look flat."
It took Sweeney a moment to figure that one out, but when he did, he broke out in a wide grin.
"I see what you did there." He got up from his chair and sat down on the other side of the couch. "Where did you learn how to do that?"
"There wasn't much to do in the last few years aside from my tutoring and some small crafts, so I read a lot. It's funny, the judge never had much skill in wordplay."
"It's not that surprising. He doesn't strike me as particularly creative." Sweeney placed his newspaper on a nearby table. "Besides, wordplay is one of those skills that runs in our family."
"Really?"
"Definitely. Most men develop this skill when they enter fatherhood, but I'm positive that everyone in my mother's side of the family was born with it."
"That makes sense."
Anthony quietly watched this exchange from his spot on the floor by the fireplace. He was glad that Mr Todd and Johanna had finally found something to talk about, as this meant that things would finally start to become a little less tense. Johanna had confided in him about what she had found out, and he'd been just as surprised as she was. He'd had no idea that it was even possible; they were just so different. However, now that he looked at them side-by-side, he could definitely see a resemblance between the two of them. Johanna had inherited Sweeney's eyes, mouth, jawline, and even his height. It was also quickly becoming apparent that they had a similar sense of humor.
A wave of fatigue suddenly began to wash over the sailor, and he yawned.
"Well..." He stood up and stretched his aching back. "I think I'm going to call it a night."
"What are you gonna call it?" Sweeney responded without missing a beat. Johanna snickered. "Sorry. Go on, we'll be quiet."
"That was awful." Anthony sighed and shook his head. "I'm going now. Good night." He turned around and headed in the direction of the guest room.
As the voices of Johanna and Mr Todd faded, Anthony yawned once more. He was exhausted. He had been very quiet that night, with the exception of a few quiet conversations with Johanna, and by the time Mr Todd had spoken up with that pun, he was struggling to stay awake.
He closed the door behind him and kicked out of his shoes. As he changed into his nightshirt, he tried not to think about the fact that his stomach had taken on a barely perceivable curve.
Right before he climbed into bed, he retrieved his journal and a pencil and began to write an entry.
June 8, 1874: Still feeling bad. Threw up twice this morning before Johanna woke up. Very busy day, whole body hurts. Starting to feel a strong craving for fish and chips, hopefully this goes away soon.
Anthony closed his journal around the pencil and placed it back on the dresser before climbing back into bed. He was asleep within about 20 minutes.
Yeah, not gonna lie, I'm actually really proud of myself for coming up with all these puns, even if they are terrible. I probably should have asked my old roommate to help. She's pretty much the king of puns.
Sorry this took so long to write. With graduation and my work schedule, getting my thoughts out on paper has been really hard lately.
