The Substitute Teacher
Chapter 4
xXx
Figuring he could always say he went to take a look at more books, Ichigo crouched down in front of the bottom shelf and slowly reached towards the album. He snorted when he noticed that his hand was trembling with anxiety, knowing he could get caught. But then again, along with the album, there was a whole set of Encyclopedia on that shelf. He pulled out an A-C volume just to be on the safe ground in case Renji walked in on him.
Okay, now he could take a peek. He cautiously took the album from the shelf, settled down in Indian style and placed it in his lap. Opening it on the first page, he saw several baby pictures, all taken in some sort of a kindergarten. The baby in the photos had bright auburn hair, so it must have been Abarai-sensei.
Flipping through the pages, he saw baby Renji with several different ladies, surrounded with other children, small and bigger. None of the ladies resembled him in any way and Ichigo began to wonder. Maybe it was a kindergarten album or something like that.
But then he saw photos from birthday parties, little Renji blowing out candles, grinning into the camera, surrounded with those same ladies and other children. Ichigo turned the page and felt his throat tighten. One big photo was taking up the whole page. Those ladies were standing in the middle of a playground, along with a dozen children and Renji among them as well. In the back there was a nice, big house with a plaque by the front door. 'Miss Saiko's children's home'.
Ichigo felt like crying.
In a second, he forgot all about his curiosity over the mysterious 'B'. Not wanting to intrude even more and risk crying like a little girl, he quickly closed the album and pushed it back onto the shelf, along with the volume of Encyclopedia. He got up and went to the sofa just in time to sit down when Renji came out of the bedroom, angrily shoving his cell phone in his jeans' pocket.
Ichigo glanced at his sensei and suddenly felt relieved for not being caught. "Um, sensei... Are you okay?"
Renji granted him with a tired smile. "Yeah... Jus' fine. Don't worry 'bout me."
The teen wondered if the lazy drawl was because Renji was upset and didn't care about the pronunciation, or because he was at home, not trying to set a good example for the students.
Trying to lighten up the atmosphere, Ichigo smirked. "Wanna talk about it?"
"Smartass," Renji barked a laugh.
After the initial shock, Ichigo joined in the laughter, although a bit more reserved than Renji.
xXx
Soon their pizzas arrived and they've spent a several moments just eating and watching TV. After a while, Ichigo kept glancing at his teacher and, remembering the photos of the little child with auburn hair, he couldn't but wonder.
"Sensei, do you dye your hair?"
"Heh," Renji chuckled and licked his fingers clean from pizza sauce and grease. "Yeah... I'm not naturally so red."
"So, you're more like... what?"
"Hmm, more like orange-brown. The first time I dyed my hair was on a dare when I was sixteen and I kinda liked it. Been like this since then."
"Do you have a photo?"
"You mean from before? Sure, wait a sec," Renji got up and went to the bookshelf, taking the same photo album that Ichigo was looking through earlier. He opened it from the back and took one loose photo, showing it to Ichigo.
The teenager in the photo was grinning at him the same grin he often saw on his teacher. Ripped jeans and a studded leather jacket, accompanied with the long loose hair that fell onto his face made Renji look like a teenage rock star.
Ichigo stared, wondering how he would get along with the teenaged Renji. Well, he wasn't so much older than him... Ten years, tops.
"How old are you now?" Obviously, his mouth decided to ask the question before he'd allowed it to.
"I'm twenty-six." The redhead grinned, guessing what was going through Ichigo's head while looking at the picture. "So tell me, orange-brown or fiery red?"
"Uhh... Either," Ichigo glanced from the photo to Renji's face and back.
"Gosh, you're a real help," the older man teased, relaxing his hands and letting the album lie on his lap. Both he and Ichigo glanced down at the other photos visible on that opened page. There were more photos of the sixteen year old Renji and some other kids, and one where he had his arm around a small woman. Ichigo recognized her as one of the ladies on the older photos. He took a deep breath and decided to test the waters.
"Who is that," he asked softly, pointing at the lady.
"That..." Renji smiled gently, looking at the picture. "That's Miss Saiko."
Ichigo remained silent, watching as Renji flipped through the pages, revealing more pictures with Miss Saiko and others.
"I grew up there," the redhead said as he came to the big group photo that Ichigo had already seen.
The teen glanced at the picture and then at his sensei. There was a mix of sadness and concern in his eyes, making Renji sigh.
"So, I guess this is the reason I want to take care of kids and found a youth center," he smiled, trying to lighten Ichigo's mood. "Please don't give me that look. I grew up happy, having everything I needed, all thanks to these kind ladies. Don't feel bad for me, okay?"
"Okay... I'm just... I'm sorry..."
"Thanks... Ichigo."
Renji smiled as the teen's brow smoothed and a little smile appeared on his lips. He knew he had to get more familiar with Ichigo for the boy to actually open up completely and they were on the good path. Calling him by his first name gave away his friendly affection and he hoped it would encourage the boy to see him as a friend, not just a teacher.
xXx
That night, Ichigo cried himself to sleep. He cried for the little baby Renji who grew up without real parents. He cried a little for himself as well, for his mom who died saving his life. So often he thought if it was worth it. Why his life was more important than hers? He could still see her worried face as she pushed him out of the way with all her might. He could still see what happened next. The whole horrible accident was engraved in his mind and he hated himself for not being able to do anything about it. Maybe, if the car hit him, he would have had more luck and then she would still be alive. The myriad of 'what if's was constantly buzzing in his mind and sometimes it was easier just to shut his brain off and spend the day on 'auto-pilot'. Get up, eat, school, home, shower, sleep. That was the most common pattern since the whole thing happened, but he noticed that lately, his days had become more fulfilled, and maybe, just maybe, a tiny bit happier.
xXx
A week later, Ichigo was sitting in his place, waiting for the class to start. As Renji came to the classroom, the students grew a bit quieter, but there were still whispers and hisses among them.
"He's so sexy..." He heard a girl behind him talking to her friend.
"I saw him in a t-shirt the other day. He's got tattoos on his arms. I wonder where else..." The other one giggled.
"He's like a tiger... Or a lion... Look at his hair... You think it's natural?"
Ichigo suppressed a chuckle. He knew all those things. And it kinda felt nice. He felt like he was privileged to know all that. Then the comments went on.
"I love when he's concentrating and his brow furrows just a bit... He's so handsome... And his voice... I could listen to him all day long...I wish he stays in our school after Ochi-sensei returns..."
"I wonder if he has a girlfriend."
Ichigo stared, listening to the girls' chatter. That's right, he'd completely forgotten about 'B'. It would be devastating for the girls to hear about Renji having a lover in Paris, waiting for him and asking him to go there.
When he thought about it, Ichigo wouldn't want him to leave either. He began to really appreciate the connection that had developed between them and it would feel like losing a real close friend if Renji left. He figured he should try to find out more and at least stop the process of getting attached to the redhead if there was any chance he might leave. There was no way Ichigo would let someone else as close as he let him.
As he kept looking in Renji's direction, their eyes met and the redhead smiled and winked at him. Ichigo wasn't completely certain, but he believed that his heart had skipped a beat at that moment.
xXx
To be continued...
