AN: I THINK THIS STORY NEEDED A LITTLE BIT OF HUMOR. SO HERE WE GO. THIS CHAPTER CAN BE RATED M... JUST TO BE SAFE.
D: LAW AND ORDER SVU AND ALL ITS CHARACTERS ARE NOT MINE.
CHAPTER 81 HORMONAL
He lays me on the bed kissing my neck slowly, touching my skin with his strong hands and placing himself between my legs. Desire takes over my body, asking for it all.
—Do it.— I ask him as my hips roll up in search of his body. And he complies. It takes just one swift movement for him to be buried deep inside me. He doesn't waste any time, his hips move quickly and firmly. His hot lips attack the skin on my neck making the fire run down my spine. He separates his head from my skin allowing me to see his face. I like him, he is very handsome, he always has been. If only he hasn't chosen to be a rapist defender lawyer for a living.
—Do you like it?— His voice puzzles me and then the doubt invades me. What the hell is Trevor Langan doing in my house, in my bed... in me?! If only I could think clearly for a moment, but it feels so good.
I can feel my pulse racing and the covers tangled in my hands. I feel myself fall unexpectedly forcing my eyes open. I listen to my heavy breathing in the dark. I rush to reach my night lamp. Yes, I am in my bedroom, in my bed, but I am alone. No signs of Trevor Langan anywhere near. I allow myself to be enveloped by reality as the dream fades away. The wet dream. I can't help but laugh as I understand what has just happened.
—Damn hormones.— I say out load between my laughter dropping my head again on my pillow.
I asked for the medical license the same day of the incident so I am now officially on desk duty. I have spent my working hours typing every paper work for each one of the cases. Every now and then I help the team with loose ends and interview the victims. But they never let me be near a suspect, or go out to the street looking for answers. Their overprotection begins to bother me. After my last unexpected visit to the hospital, Kyle made sure everyone promised to take care of me, or rather to watch over me.
So I have a lot of time to spare lately. I try to occupy my mind in the book that Melinda gave me, or in the pregnancy magazines that Casey brought me. I sometimes even find time to lie down on the cribs. I have found out that when I keep still in bed is when the little bean decides to wake up and do stunts inside of me. I love to feel it and see how it makes my belly move. Although at night, when I want to sleep, I would appreciate for it to sleep too. Now it's bigger. There is no blouse or t-shirt that can hide it anymore. Not even under a dress.
—Are you asleep?— I ask lowering my gaze to my belly. Lately I have been talking to it all the time. I had already gotten used to talking to myself during my zombie state, but now it's different. I have an excuse to do it. —I think you are.— I uncover and get up without much problem. Kyle says that I should take advantage of this months because later I will have a belly so big that not even sitting will be easy.
I walk to the window and let my thoughts wonder. I feel like a teenager having wet dreams, and the fact that they involve Trevor Langan makes it even worse. Well, I can't deny that he's handsome but I never imagined something like that. My body takes care of playing bad tricks on me with these dreams, and the hot weather doesn't help much. But they are just dreams, it's nice to know that the last man I was really with was Elliot. That is something I will never regret. I look out to the street and I can see the lights of the lanterns and the silence of the night. I turn to see the time on my watch 2:37 am.
—It will be a long night.— I say going back to my bed, and I try to focus my mind on the good stories told by Bernie and the kids trying to make my dreams a bit more normal. Although, wet dreams doesn't seem that bad compared to the nightmares I used to have. I actually don't remember when it was the last time I had one.
—Good morning, Liv.— Samuel says when he sees me enter the station.
—Good morning.— I answer reaching my desk as I notice the pile of papers that are there. —So, he confessed?— I ask him with some strange expression because he laughs when he sees me.
—Yup. We are waiting for Casey.—
—Oh.— I can't say much. I already expected to have the papers soon. They just needed to get the soup out of the man and, apparently, they have succeeded.
—Were you here all night?— I ask him sitting down and beginning to arrange the papers in a chronological order.
—Yes.— Samuel says without much encouragement. —I'm leaving now. Karen and Tania are waiting for me.—
—How is your girl?— I ask when I remember the little baby girl I met a few days ago.
—Fine. Getting bigger and bigger every day.— I can notice the dark circles under his eyes remembering the thousand nights that I was in his place giving my sleep hours to the job.
—Are my papers ready?— I hear Casey's voice behind me.
—Almost.— I say somewhat altered because I haven't even started. She reaches over and bends down to touch my belly.
—How is my baby doing uh? Are you growing a lot little one?— Having people touching my belly and talking like babies before even greeting me is weird, but fun at the same time.
—Wow Novak, I never thought I'll see you baby talking.— I look up to find Trevor Langan entering the precinct.
—Langan. I didn't know you were coming.— Casey says, standing up and returning to her serious lawyer face.
—Do you think I'll leave my client alone with that rookie detective around?— I can see Samuel's anger at the comment but he doesn't say anything, he just takes his things and walks towards the exit.
—See you later Liv.— He says goodbye and disappears. I try to stay focused on the paperwork on my computer and avoid the memories of my strange dreams, his presence doesn't help much, though.
—I was waiting for you and for my papers.— He says, keeping his eyes on me.
—It won't take long.— I say again without even turning to see him. I can feel his proximity and the images come back to my mind.
—How far along are you, Benson?— He asks pointing to my belly.
—Six months and three weeks.— I answer, concentrating on separating the papers he needs so that he can get out of here as soon as possible.
—Can I?— He brings his hand to me leaving it centimeters away from actually touchin, waiting for my answer. I turn up to try and give him an annoyed look but I instantly regret it. Looking at his face so close to mine only makes my body react.
—Sure.— I try to think of other things but it is impossible as I feel his warm hand on my belly. He smiles at the sensation making him look extremely handsome and I am glad he can't read minds. I rush to take the papers from the printer and put them in a folder.
—Pregnancy suits you, Olivia.— His big green eyes frozen on mine.
—Here.— I offer him the folder trying to get him to separate from my body. And thank heaven he does.
—Thank you.- He gets up and walks towards the captain's office. I unconsciously let out a big sigh when I see him disappear and I put my head on my desk.
—Damn hormones.— I complain without even bothering to separate my face from the cold material.
I hate Kyle at the moment, he has taken very well care of me. He has told me each and every one of the symptoms that I should expect to have in each of the stages, but why the hell did he forget to mention this?! If it weren't for Melinda's wonderful book I would have had no idea that hormones would go haywire at some point. I would be thinking I am insanely in love with that bastard. Oh, you will listen to me Kyle Beresford.
—Ready for the ultrasound?— Kyle asks, moving the familiar device towards me.
The last time we saw the little bean it has its legs crossed as if It didn't want to let us know its gender. But lately it has been moving so much that I am sure this time we will be able to take a pick.
—Yes.— My mind keeps working on ideas so I can talk about this new symptom with Kyle. But it's not as easy as I thought. I don't know why, but telling him about my sudden sexual urge causes me some embarrassment.
—Hopefully we'll see more.— He says, starting to place the cold gel on my skin. Just what I needed, more sensations in my body that won't let me think clearly.
—I hope so.— I try to stay as normal as possible while he moves the cold material around. I focus my attention on the monitor, hoping to find the bean figure. Well, it doesn't look like a bean anymore.
—And there you are.— Kyle's habit of talking while doing ultrasounds is funny. —Look at it Liv. Can you see that?— He says pointing to the monitor enthusiastically while I continue in my search for my baby's shape.
—Wait.— I demand.
—There is the head, the arms, body, legs. See? He points everything quickly helping me.
—Now I see it.— I assure him.
—Well, now look here.— His finger points into a shadow on the monitor.
—Take away your hand so I can see.— I complain as he complies and laughs at me.
—Can you see that spot there?— His patient is such a great virtue. Of course I already saw it, but it has no shape. I approach the monitor lifting my body a little and forcing my eyes.
—It's... oh.— I finally understand.
—Congratulations, Liv. You are having a baby boy.— And the wave of feelings attacks me. The tears in my eyes no longer bother me so much. They are tears of happiness. I immediately picture a beautiful baby boy with his facial features and those huge blue eyes.
—A little man?— I ask him without looking away from the monitor.
—Yes. Your little man.— I can notice that he doesn't take his eyes off me. Surely my face is full of expressions that reflect the ocean of feelings in me. Soon I start crying without being able to stop myself.
—I'm sorry.— I say wiping the tears from my cheek, noticing the smile on my face.
—You don't have to apologize every time you cry, Live.— Kyle says, separating the device from me and handing me a couple of tissues.
—I'm sorry.— I apologize for apologizing before. He is amused and I start to laugh with him, causing the little boy to kick hard.
—Do I woke you up my little man?— I say taking my hand to my belly to feel his movement.
—Of course. His senses are quite developed by now. He can hear many things...— and so the doctor's speech begins. —...If you place a direct light on your tummy it is possible that the baby opens his eyes, and if he could talk to you he would say: turn off the light mommy, I'm trying to sleep!—
—Your baby voice is quite a show.— I tell him. —Silly.— I laugh harder this time.
—I am pretty sure his favorite sound is that of your laugh.— He fixes his gaze on me and makes me blush a little. —You should let him listen to it more often.— I look down thinking that I don't really laugh much, but I've never been a woman who laughs through life. It's not as if my life is very funny.
—You're going to make it to the third quarter in perfect health, Livie.— He starts putting away his equipment. —The symptoms have been good with you lately.—
—Yeah, sure.— I say out loud without even thinking about it. I realize when he sees me with some concern.
—Have you felt bad?— He asks approaching to help me get down the examination bed.
—Ahm... not exactly. It's just that you forgot to mention one particular symptom.— I give him an annoyed look in a funny matter so that he would notice it's not something serious.
—What is it?— But he does not remove concerned his expression. And then I realize I can't really tell him what it is, for some reason, I'm embarrassed to tell him that my hormones have been trying to control me lately. I can feel the anger from this morning disappear. He doesn't really need to know. There's nothing I can do about it anyways. Is there?
— It's nothing, forget it.—
—I'd rather not. You can tell me anting.—
—It's silly, actually.— I can't help but smile like a fool, but he insists with his serious look —ahm... let's say that lately my body asks for things...— I can't explain it to him, it's terrible. It's never been difficult for me to talk about sex with anyone. For the Christ's sake Olivia, you are an SVU detective!
—Things.— He tries to encourage me but I can't say anything else. —I see.— I suppose he notices the difficulty I'm having to be able to say it and he gives me the easy way out.
—Yeah, I've read about it.— I try to make no big deal. —It is normal and it will go away. So there is nothing to discuss really.—
—Yes, it is normal. Your hormones are a bit excited.— I let out the air that at some point I had retained while I walk to take my things. He walks to the back side of his desk in order to take his stuff as well. We've agreed to have bubble tea for dinner. It has turn into some kind of habit for us now. I really hope he doesn't try to talk about this any further. —You have several options.— But apparently he will not forget it soon.
—Yeah, no... I don't want to talk about it.— I say getting to the exit as fast as I can. He just laughs silently turning off the lights in the office behind us.
I savor my tea while I play with the funny tapioca balls. I can't stop thinking about the little man on the monitor screen. I am anxious to tell others about the news. A baby boy. Bets reappeared at the station, there are the ones who thought it was a girl against those who thought of a boy. I can imagine Munch's happy face knowing that he defeated almost everyone.
I also want to tell Bernie and the kids about it.
—What's in your mind?—Kyle asks, putting his straw aside.
—Elizabeth called me last week to see if we could go out soon.— I answer.
—She wants to go to the hot dogs.—I like that he remembers the things that I have told him.
—I hope so. She has to gather with her siblings.— He nods and takes his drink again taking a sip before talking.
—Can I ask you something?—
—Yes.— I say with a little doubt.
—When will you tell everyone who the father is?— It seems he has his mind occupied as well. I don't want to think about that. That topic is supposed to be well-guarded in the back of my brain.
—I don't know.— I answer with the truth. —I suppose they will have to find out eventually.— The very few dreams I have had with my baby always shows a baby with very particular traits of Elliot, so I hope these gives them a clue and spare me the annoyance of having to tell. — It's not of their business anyways.—
—Maybe not but, I think you should at least tell...—
—The people that need to know already knows. Please, Kyle, asks something else because that topic is not very pleasant to me.— I interrupt him.
—Okay. That sexual tension really has you in a mood uh?— He begins to laugh without any regret managing to get another withering look from me and a big straw to crash on his face.
—I'm sorry.— He tries to apologize without stoping his laughs.
Although I try to maintain my anger it is difficult for me, as his laughter is contagious. One of the reasons why I have stayed so close to him. Sometimes I tend to think that he is like the star that appeared in the middle of my dark night.
—Enough. That's exactly why I didn't want to tell you.— I complain already laughing.
—It's okay, it's completely normal. And if you want my opinion...—
—No, Kyle, I don't want your opinion.— I cut him off.
—My medical opinion.— He insists with his eyes. I doubt a little before answering.
—Okay, just pure medical opinion.— I allow him to continue.
—The question I receive most frequently regarding sex during pregnancy is whether the baby can be hurt, and it all depends on each case. For example, for you who do not have any complications, sex is safe.—
— Good to know.— I answer sarcastically. —Not that it matters anyway. I am not planning to have sex anytime soon.—
—Why not? It could be the best sex of your life you know?— He get out of the medical opinion quiet soon. —Medically talking of course.— But safes his ass.
—I doubt that, because I am sure that I've already had the best sex of all my life which, by the way, is the cause of the best thing that has ever happened to me.— I answer pointing to my baby belly. —And I don't want to talk about it anymore.— I take the straw from where it had landed before on the table just to throw it to him again.
—Okey, we should better talk about controlling your emotions.— He says mockingly.
—Mean.— I tel him while getting the straw again and placing it in its proper place to keep drinking my tea.
—That's not healthy.— He says but doesn't dare to stop me.
—Leave me alone.— I ask him with fake annoyance. He laughs and decides to stop focusing on his own beverage.
Suddenly my cell phone starts to vibrate followed by the tone, so I choose to put the fight aside and take my attention to my phone's screen to see who it is and the surprise invades me when I read it.
Elliot
I am paralyzed noticing that in fact the tone is the one that I had set for his contact so long ago. I haven't heard it for so long...
TO BE CONTINUED.
AN: THANKS FOR READING AND PLEASE LET ME KNOW YOUR OPINIONS. STAY SAFE.
