(hii this fic is a bit different to the others, as it's more on injury and injury recovery and a different side to Aaron, so I understand if this isn't what everyone likes, so if you don't just don't read it lol. But for those whose it is, enjoy :)
It had been 7 months since the accident had changed Aaron's life, he was no longer the BAU's section unit chief. He didn't even know who he was anymore.
During a case, Aaron had been involved in a serious car crash which had almost killed him, he had been told over and over how lucky he was to still be here. He wasn't so sure if he'd call himself lucky to how he was now.
He had suffered a traumatic brain injury which had left him in a coma for 3 weeks. It had affected his speech, motor skills and memory. He was emotional, he lashed out and had frequent mood swings that wasn't like him at all, but he wasn't able to control it. He was left dependent being able to do nothing for himself, which was the thing he hated the most. The thing he'd always valued the most was his independence and his pride, which were both stripped from him. He had spent months in rehab and was coming home today, to his wife Emily. Who hadn't left his side once.
The accident had left him with little to no motor skills, over the months in rehab he had managed to lift a few things but it was no use. He was told these things could take months, if not years. His speech was worse hit, when he first woke he hadn't able to string together a few words. Even though he knew what to say, whenever it came out it sounded like a bunch of stutters, mumbles and jibberish. He wasn't able to remember much short term, he forgot a lot of things and couldn't process new information. He remembered his life, but anything he was told that day he would forget by the night. But as he was constantly reassured, it may get better in time. The 'may' always stood out to him, the thought of being like this forever scared him.
He hated being like this, the doctors treat him like a child learning basic skills that he knew how to do, he just couldn't do. The only person pulling him through this was Emily. She was quite literally his rock, he used to cringe at people saying that but he now understood the reason for it.
It was his first official night home and it hadn't gone great,he was irritated and in pain the whole night. If he wasn't moaning in agony, he would have fits of emotional tears, which was never how he used to be. Since his injury, his emotions had been uncontrollable and he felt powerless, useless. He didn't know why Emily would of wanted to stay. She had her job, her freedom, she didn't have to be tied to him. But nonetheless she stayed through it all. She was used to his mood swings now and didn't ever judge him, she never treat him like a child or like he was useless because she knew he wasn't.
Emily was getting Aaron dressed, he had tried to do it himself and managed to pull down his shirt from his head, and although it wasn't much. It was progress.
"What would you like for breakfast?" She asked softly, as she helped him into his wheelchair.
"A- anything." He said with a small shrug.
When he had woken, he hadn't able to chew solid foods and a few weeks ago he had just been taken off a feeding tube as it was huge struggle through recovery, he had found it difficult to swallow and chew properly. But he was getting better at it.
Emily placed his chair at the table and poured him a glass of orange juice with a straw in so he could move his head forward and drink it himself. She placed the glass in front of him and went to make some oatmeal.
When she had finished making it, the glass was nearly empty, "You were thirsty" she chuckled a little.
He nodded, she stirred the oatmeal and looked at him. "Do you want to try?" She asked, handing him the spoon.
He exhaled, shakily taking the spoon and putting a small amount of oatmeal on the spoon. He slowly, shakily put in his mouth, smudging a bit on his upper lip as he swallowed it. Emily handed him a napkin, which he slowly wiped his lip with.
He looked at her, smiling a little, he'd never successfully done it before.
He shakily took it again, as he attempted to feed himself once more. As it spilled onto his lap before he took it to his lips, he groaned in annoyance.
She gently cleaned up the oatmeal with her napkin, "It's okay, small steps remember?" She said, kissing his cheek and taking the spoon from him, feeding him the rest.
After breakfast, Emily had started cleaning it all up whilst Aaron was watching tv. His physical therapist was coming round later, and each time she came, he dreaded it. It was just another reminder that he couldn't do anything.
"Jack's round tonight,remember?" Emily said, coming next to him.
He shook his head, he didn't remember, since his accident Haley and Emily had arranged for him to see Jack every other Wednesday. It was emotional for them both, Jack didn't recognise the man who was now his dad and Hotch's emotions flew all over the place when Jack was around. Due to being sad he couldn't be the father to his son that he once had been and anger that he couldn't.
"Emily.." Aaron sunk, swallowing.
"What's up?"
"I need to go.." he said, going red. Despite her helping him before, it never got less embarrassing for him. At the start, he was in colostomy and urostomy bags, but when he entered rehab he had been upgraded to some sort of diaper. Which was just as embarrassing, if not more but he sometimes couldn't tell when he had to go and it avoided accidents this way. He hadn't had one in a while, but at the start of rehab they were common and it ended in Aaron getting upset.
She nodded, and wheeled him to the bathroom, she knew how embarrassed he got by this. She helped him onto the toilet and let him do his business, helping him back up into his chair. "Could you feel that one more?" She asked.
"Yeah, I think it's getting better..hopefully I won't need, these, soon" he said, referring to the diapers.
"Yeah. That would be good." She said kissing his cheek.
"How's the team?" He asked.
"They're good. They miss us"
"When are you- going back?" He asked, swallowing. The thought of him having a caretaker didn't sit right with him, he should be there with them.
"Not for another few weeks, don't worry."
He nodded softly, he didn't say much these days, to save himself the embarrassment of stuttering and because he never knew what to say.
—
The evening soon came, Aaron's physical therapist had really pushed him today. Maybe too far because it ended in him in a panic and quiet for the rest of the day. But his therapist said he was making progress, and she said it wouldn't be long till he could replace his wheelchair with a Walker. Aaron didn't believe her. The visit had tired Aaron out for the rest of the day and he had spent the rest of the day asleep.
Aaron awoke to the sound of Jack running in, "Daddy!" He said, jumping onto his lap which caused Jack to wince.
"Hey..buddy" Aaron said tiredly, after all he'd just woke.
"Emmy said we may be able to get ice cream, can we?!"
Aaron looked at Jack and chuckled softly, "Yeah..if that's what you want."
—-
Emily was wheeling Aaron's chair as Jack ran ahead in front, although he liked seeing Jack happy, he hated the stares he'd get from people. The look of sorrow, people feeling sorry for him and wondering how he ended up there. Sometimes he'd have nightmares of the crash, he thought about the crash a lot, maybe if he did things differently. But Emily had told him there was no point in reflecting on the past, he has to focus on getting better.
"Do you want one?" Emily asked, as she got herself and Jack an ice cream.
Aaron shook his head, it saved him the embarrassment of having to be fed in public. In Rehab, the nurses had took them out for lunch and it had ended in Aaron refusing his meal. He hated people seeing him vulnerable, and that was about as vulnerable as it got in front of people.
When they returned home, Emily had started cooking dinner whilst Jack read to Aaron. Although he loved the fact his son could read, which was why he would read to him to help him improve, he felt like he was failing at the fact that he couldn't read it to Jack. The doctors told him his linguistic skills would take time. He was seeing a speech and reading doctor who specialised in TBI's twice a week, he had improved on his hand writing but reading was going to take a little longer.
"Dinners ready!" Emily shouted, as she went to wheel Aaron in.
Aaron sighed, picking up the fork shakily, he wanted to prove to his son he wasn't so weak. He managed a few mouthfuls by himself, spilling some down his chin which made Jack laugh, but embarrassed Aaron.
After the 5th forkful, which was better than anytime before, he gave up frustrated.
"It's okay, Aaron." She said, wiping his mouth.
"No it's not." He said, tearfully as tears threatened to fall.
"Don't get upset, daddy" Jack said, looking at him.
"I'm not- I just- I'm okay..Jack" he choked, holding in his tears. He wanted to control his emotions.
"You'll do better tomorrow, you did better than this morning." Emily said, placing a hand on his cheek and helping him eat the rest.
Soon after dinner, as much as Aaron tried to resist, he ended up falling asleep whilst they were all watching a movie.
Emily heard a knock on the door, "That'll be your mom." She said softly to Jack, "Kiss your daddy goodbye, don't wake him he's sleepy"
Jack nodded, softly kissing Aaron on the cheek and running to the door.
"Hey" Emily said quietly, smiling at Haley.
"Did you have a nice time Jack?" Haley asked, smiling at Emily.
"Yeah, daddy's asleep now." Jack said, playing with his hands.
"How is Aaron?" Haley asked, sighing.
"He's...doing better. There's good days and bad. It's just- hard." Emily shrugged.
Haley nodded, "I know, I can Imagine..especially for a man like Aaron."
Emily nodded, she knew Aaron valued his independence and he was the typical alpha male man as Reid would say.
"We just have to..take it each day." Emily said with a small sigh. She was going to be there for him every step of the way, however long that took.
