AN: OK... I THOUGHT THIS WAS ALMOST OVER BUT I HAVE BEEN WORKING ON THE TRANSLATION AND I HAVE NOTICED ITS NOT QUITE OVER... BUT I AM NOT SURE HOW MANY PEOPLE IS STILL INTO THIS STORY SO I AM THINKING ON WRTING OUT SOME CHAPTERS AND JUST GIVE IT THE ENDING. LET ME KNOW IF THAT IS OK. THANKS FOR READING.

D: LAW AND ORDER SVU AND ALL ITS CHARACTERS ARE NOT MINE.

CHAPTER 92 I TOLD YOU SO?

I lay with the baby on the bed while we wait for Kyle to arrive with the things I've asked for. The atmosphere has cooled down quite quickly, the snow is already falling covering the city in a light layer of white. Christmas decorations are already lighting up the streets in anticipation of the holidays, and the stores have began their year-end sales.

I was planning to go grocery shopping but, to tell the truth, I don't feel like going out in the cold night with my little man. Thank heaven Kyle dialed me to see if we happened to need anything from the store, as he was already there. He has been working more than usual, rehabs because this time of the year people tend to get sicker. In addition, he has not wanted to come directly from his work because he says that he can bring viruses and diseases. He has gotten used to going to his apartment to take a shower and change his clothes before visiting us. Actually, we weren't planning to see each other today, but his timely call has changed plans. So we are waiting for him.

—Where is Phillip?— I cover my face with my hands playing with the little one on the bed.

—There you are!— The beautiful sound of his laughter fills the room, followed by mine.

—Is he still awake?— I notice that Kyle enters the room with the baby's full bottle in hand. I turn to see him and I give him a grateful smile as he hands me the milk. Immediately Phillip demands my attention bringing his little hands to the skin of my face and making a slight noise with his throat.

—Oh, Where is Phillip?— I got back to the game covering my face again. I spy through my fingers to get to see on his face that expression of intrigue that I like so much, waiting patiently until I decide to continue. —There you are!" —Again he laughs, moving his limbs with energy.

—If you keep exciting him he will never go to sleep.— Kyle scolds me as he watches us through the reflection of the mirror. It is then that I realize that he is very well dressed and I notice the aroma of his lotion.

—Are you going out?— I ask him without fully withdrawing my attention from my child.

—Yes, do you remember the nurse I was introduced to last week?— I nod my head remembering that he has told me how his colleagues were in charge of introducing him to a new hospital nurse. —Well, I decided to invite her to dinner.— Something bothers me but I decide to leave it in my interior.

—Good.— I take Phillip in my arms to be able to give him his milk and hopefully make him sleep. But the little one refuses to lie down and rejects the bottle. He prefers to stand in an upright position and play with the strands of my hair.

—I brought you formula milk and more diapers.— Kyle says, pointing to the door to show me where he has left them.

—Thanks. Did you take the money from the table?— I ask him remembering the exact place where I left the money for him. He knows I won't allow for him to pay for our stuff.

—Yes.— He approaches us to give Phillip a kiss on his rosy cheek, who immediately turns to see him and stretches to demand his arms.

—Come here champion.— Kyle does not hesitate a bit to take him off my arms and lift him up in the air making him laugh again. I watch his beautiful eyes fill with light while he enjoys the game. Two small dimples form in his cheeks when he smiles and his short curls bounce on his little head. Right away my heart pounds against my ribs and I can't help but giggle slightly.

—-It's time to sleep! Yes, go to sleep already.— Kyle tells the baby stopping his game. —Go to mom.— He turns him agilely towards me and I hurry to receive him with a big hug.

—Well, I let you two to rest.— He says still smiling at the little boy.

—Drive carefully, there is a lot of snow.— I tell him.

—Sure. I'll call you tomorrow.— He says approaching me to give me a warm kiss on the cheek.

—Okey. Have a good... time.— We accompany him to the exit door to lock it properly. Before he leaves my hand flies unconsciously up to his arm stopping him. He turns to see me with doubt and the truth is I have nothing to say to him. I cannot ask him not to leave, even if he wanted to. Selfish. I could invent any excuse for him to stay. My selfishness is too much. I can't make him cancel his date.

—Liv?— He asks me without taking his gaze from my eyes.

—Ahm... Good luck on your date.— I tell him trying to hide whatever I am feeling.

—Thank you.— I release his arm and let him go. A frustrated sigh leaving my body as soon as he closes the door.

—Let's sleep sweet boy.— I tell Philip while he looks around intrigued. I know he is looking for him and I know the emptiness he feels every time he leaves. I feel the same. —I know baby.— It's a fact that Kyle became part of my life some time ago. It wasn't planned, it wasn't even thought, it just happened and I'll be forever grateful. I don't even dare to imagine what would have been of me without having him by my side during that period of pain. And now, he is not only part of my life, but also of Phillip's.

—Come on my love, we'll see him tomorrow.— I'm in charge of getting to his room and preparing his crib. We go back to my bedroom to take the bottle and I start to walk around the apartment until I can get him to snuggle into my arms and start drinking his milk. I try to focus on his calm breathing while I dare to probe a bit into the feeling that continues to invade me. Maybe I'm just worried that he is this late on the sold streets. What if a strong storm falls again while he is in a restaurant with the nurse. What if he stays with her all night? Hell... who am I kidding.

—Yeah, sure Olivia.— I tell myself a bit annoyed. I go to my phone and decide to dial him. I don't know what for but I do. I wait impatiently for him to answer while I start looking for a good excuse to justify my call. But he doesn't answer. I take a deep breath and walk to Phillip's room, lean him on my shoulder so he can get out the air he needs, and as soon he does he falls asleep soundly.

I shouldn't even allow myself to feel what I am feeling. It is selfish enough of me to monopolize most of his time to want him to be with me even more. Besides, I want him to be happy, right? Maybe he finds his soul mate in this nurse, and decides to make a life of his own away from me. Or maybe not with this nurse but... he deserves someone. If something I have to face is that at some point a woman will come into his life and he will have to leave mine. And, selfishly, I don't like the idea one bit.

I decide to put all thoughts out of my mind and focus all my attention on my little one. I carefully place him in his crib and make sure he's comfortable. I pull the sofa in the corner near his crib so I can watch him sleep. I focus on the photo that adorns the wall above his crib and let out a big sigh.

—What should I do Elliot?—

"I settle into the car seat looking for the most comfortable position I can get. We have been standing here for more than five hours waiting for the suspect to leave his house, but there has been no movement, and I honestly think that there will not be until dawn, so I do not see the case that we are here wasting time when we could be investigating the other leads at the station, or resting. But the captain has given the order and we have no choice but to obey it. I let out a heavy sigh, perhaps in frustration, and turned to see Elliot. In his expression I can see the discomfort that the situation also causes but he has not said anything in what seems like an eternity. In fact neither of us have opened our mouths at all, silence has been our companion all along.

He turns to see me and a twisted smile appears on his face. He raises his hand and places it on my knee, as a sign of companionship. He knows we are stranded here until further notice and I suppose he has noticed my displeasure as well.

—Get some sleep Liv.— it's strange to hear him speak after so much silence, but I have to say it's nice. I've always liked the sound of his voice. I remember that it was one of the first things I liked when we started working together... two long years ago. The thought makes me smile a little. —What?— He asks.

—Nothing.— I say listening to how scratchy and tense my voice is. —You sleep. I'm fine.— He smiles and doesn't answer anymore. He turns towards the house just to see there is no movement.

—I do not think he will come out at this time.— I say highlighting the obvious. I throw my head back and close my eyes trying to relax.

—Neither do I. Yet, you never know.— I can feel that he has turned his gaze towards me, but I don't even make an effort to open my eyes.

—What happened with Cassidy?— He asks what I know he has been wanting to ask for a while. He is just trying to bring it up casually. — Have you talked to him?— Honestly it doesn't seem appropriate. It's been several months since Cassidy left the unit and to tell the truth... I'm glad.

—No.— I answer without even opening my eyes.

—Monosyllabic Benson.— He dares to call me by that name he has come up with months ago wanting to have more information.

—There is nothing to talk about.— I comply. —That was over long ago.—

—I'm glad.— His words strange me. It was obvious that he was upset when he found out that I was sleeping with Brian, but I never thought it bordered him so much for been glad it was over. I turn to see him with an expression of doubt demanding that he say more.

—Glad?— I insist repeating his words in the form of a question.

—Yes. I don't think you were happy with him.— He says explaining his point. —He was... not good enough for you Liv.— I let out one more sigh, knowing that his words are full of truth. In fact, I always knew it myself.

—Sometimes I think there really is no one for me.— I accept with a bit of disappointment.

—Of course there must be someone. And when you find him I will let you know myself since you are somewhat blind.— He jokes making me laugh a little.

—Hey!— I complain —I'm not blind. I think even quite the opposite. I can see a defect in everyone.—

—Yes.— He accepts. —Still, let's make a bet.— He says amused, in his expression there is no more boredom or frustration, in fact I think the environment is no longer stressful.

—A bet? With my love life?— I ask faking annoyance. But I do want to know what nonsense has occurred to him. —I'm listening.—

—The day you find a man who deserves you, respects you and loves you...—

—Wishful thinking.— I interrupt earning a grimace from him.

—Would you let me talk Benson? When that day comes I will be honored to give you an "I told you so" without any complain and you'll have to accept I was always right. Always.—

—And, if it doesn't happen will you accept I was and will be always right?—

—Sure I will. I love there is a lifetime to prove you wrong.— He says with his cocky grin on. —You will remember this day, Benson.—

—Well, If it ever happens I am sure my insane partner will scare him and make him run away for the hills.— I secretly love we talk about the future picturing each other as partners.

—Of course he won't. Because when it happens your insane partner here will be a very happy man because his best friend found someone good to live with.— It is strange to hear Stabler speak, letting out his feelings a bit. I take care of recording his words in my mind, hoping that one day he can really tell me an I TOLD YOU SO with a triumphant smile on his face."

A strange noise awakens me. I look around discovering that I am still on the sofa next to Phillip's crib. I observe him carefully making sure that he is still asleep. I move to reach my cell phone that continues to vibrate on the small nightstand. I look at the screen to discover who is calling me at this time and I hasten to answer.

—Hello?— My voice sounds sleepy.

—Are you all right?— He asks with a slight tone of alarm in his voice.

—Yes. Why?— I get up stretching a little and I bend down to cover Phillip.

—I had a missed call from you, Liv.— His words remind me that, indeed, I dialed him before I fell asleep.

—Oh, yeah. Everything is fine, I dialed you by mistake.— I lie... terribly.

—Okay. How is little Phillip?—

—Asleep.—

—Good. ahm...— I'm on my way to my apartment. I must accept that I am glad to know that his date has had an early end. Maybe I should ask him how it went, but I'm not the least bit interested in hearing how wonderful his night could have been. —Then... see you tomorrow?— He continues when he doesn't see an answer from me.

—Yes, of course. Here we will wait for you.— I have noticed that the mere fact of knowing that tomorrow we will see him has managed to get a big smile on my face, which I suppress immediately.

—Good Night, Liv.—

—Thanks. Good night.—I wait for him to hang up the phone. I take care of tucking in my little bean once more and leave the intercom on before getting to my bedroom. I drop onto the soft mattress and slide to cover myself with the covers. I verify that my intercom is on and I listen to the baby's soft breathing through it.

Soon I find myself remembering my dream. I don't know what to think, is that a kind of sign? Elliot would really be happy to see me happy, wouldn't he? I do not know what to do.

—Is this your way of telling me TOLD YOU SO, Stabler?— I complain looking up at my ceiling.

TO BE CONTINUED...

AN: STAY SAFE.