I honestly don't know what to think about this fic, but hope you like it! :)

There are some canon bits of dialogue in this, and I've tried to follow the canon events as much as I could, whilst adding in my own bits.


Not Just a Werewolf


The trio turned and headed back towards the castle, walking slowly as to keep themselves hidden under Harry's cloak. It was getting darker quickly, and they were still in shock about Buckbeak's execution.

"Wormy, keep still," Ron hissed, grabbing for the small creature in his shirt pocket. The insect was wriggling madly. Ron came to a quick stop, trying to push him back in.

"Stop it you stupid - OUCH! He bit me!"

"Ron, be quiet," Hermione urgently whispered. "Everyone knows that worms can't bite - they don't have teeth."

"But he did," Ron whispered, whimpering softly and cradling his injured hand with one hand, and clutching the worm with the other, as the worm wiggled, trying to find his way to freedom.

"Look out," Harry shouted, spotting the small dog that had been haunting his nightmares slink towards them.

Hermione and Ron turned to look at the dog. "Harry, that's a shih-tzu," Hermione laughed. "What's it going to do?"

As though it felt a need to prove itself, the dog launched itself at Ron, grabbing him and using all of its might to drag him towards the Nagging Nutmeg tree. Harry and Hermione watched without moving, utterly amazed at the dog's show of strength, and wondering why Ron hadn't pulled free.

"Help me," Ron shouted. "It's dragging me towards the Nagging Nutmeg. It sounds like Hermione!"

"Surely he can get away from a little dog by himself?" Hermione said, starting in the other direction at the comment. Harry was relieved that Hermione hadn't hexed him for that, after all, she did punch Draco Malfoy, and girls can be violent.

"But we're his friends," Harry said.

"After that comment, I think we should let that dog eat him," Hermione replied frostily. "If he can't get away from it, he deserves to be eaten. Survival of the fittest and all."

Harry could see her point.

"After all," Hermione continued, looking around and lowering her voice to a whisper. "He does support Chudley Cannons." They both shivered at the name.

"I wouldn't feel right, letting a tiny dog eat him," Harry finally said. "The Weasleys have been so nice to me, and imagine how they'd feel telling people that their son didn't die heroically - rather that he was eaten by a tiny dog."

Hermione nodded. "Right, let's get past the tree and save Ron," she said. "But if he says anything about my nagging again…"

Harry gulped. He had heard Hermione's nagging before, and didn't want to be there for when Hermione started on Ron about his behaviour.

"Lumos," Harry said, withdrawing his wand and wrapping up the cloak. In the darkness they began to make their way towards the tree.

"Wash your hands," the tree shouted, making the pair wince. "Shine your shoes, blow your nose. Did you do your homework?"

"Cover your ears," Harry shouted.

"Look, it's dragged him under the tree," Hermione shouted in return. The pair watched in amazement for a moment as Ron's legs disappeared.

"What time do you call this? Dinner was on the table an hour ago," the tree roared. "Well, you can just eat it cold, can't you?!"

Harry trembled at Hermione's side, as she led the way from the branches waving the ends at the pair, as though scolding them.

"You need to brush your hair - it's like a bird's nest," the tree roared at Hermione.

"It most certainly is not," Hermione shouted back. "It's just wild."

"You should make a bigger attempt to look presentable," the tree continued.

"You can talk, look at all of these fallen leaves, it's like you're not even trying to make this area look nice," Hermione retorted.

The tree was stunned silent, and Harry dragged Hermione to a small hole in the trunk. "Did you just out-nag the tree?" he asked in amazement.

Hermione stayed silent at his side, and they began to walk to the tunnel. "You know, this tunnel seems to lead to Hogsmeade," Harry murmured.

Hermione nodded, clutching Harry's arm as they stumbled through the tunnel, bent almost double.

Finally they reached an opening, a small crack of light above them. Harry pushed the trap door open and climbed up, his wand out. Satisfied that the place was empty, Harry reached his hand down to help Hermione up.

The pair looked around, noticing that the dirt that layered the floor had been disturbed through the room and out into the shadowy hallway.

Harry made to walk towards them, but Hermione grabbed his arm. "I think we're in the Shrieking shack," she whispered.

Blood was splattered on every wall in the room.

Harry looked around again, before agreeing with Hermione. His eyes fell on something orange on the table, and he frowned.

"Ghosts don't wear orange," he replied.

"Ghosts don't actually wear anything except what they died in," Hermione replied.

"Oh yeah," Harry muttered. "Do you think Ron could have dropped it?"

They stared at the scrap of orange material.

"He wouldn't have been anywhere near that table," Hermione whispered, as they heard a creak overhead.

They headed out into the hall and walked up the staircase, impressed that the tiny dog had managed to drag a tall boy up the stairs. Clearly the dog was some sort of super-dog or something. Harry wondered if he could somehow keep the dog as a pet.

They approached a door at the top of the stairs, hearing Ron's groan from behind it, and Harry snuck forward and kicked the door wide open.

On the floor, his leg stuck out at an odd angle, was Ron.

"Harry, run, it's a trap," Ron sobbed. "He's not a dog, he's an Animagus."

"That explains the strength," Hermione muttered as the door closed again, revealing a hidden. exhausted looking man who had his hands on his knees and was panting. "Hold on," he said, raising his hand. "Still catching my breath."

The pair waited patiently, and when the man straightened up, they gasped.

"Sirius Black!"

"Expelliarmus," he croaked, through a shallow breath, pointing Ron's wand at them. The two wands quickly flew to Sirius.

"I knew you'd come and help your friend," he said, hoarsely.

Harry shrugged. "We couldn't let him get killed by a little dog, that would have been embarrassing," he replied. "Almost as embarrassing as turning into one!"

The man cracked a smile, before chuckling. "You know, your father said the same thing to me. We were friends, you know - he would have come to save me too."

The mention of Harry's father, made anger boil up inside Harry. He threw himself forward, but Hermione pushed him back. "Are you stupid?" she hissed. "You're thirteen, and he's from Azkaban. He'd probably snap your neck like a twig."

"He killed -"

"Let's hope you're not violently murdered, too," Hermione snapped.

Harry was shaking with anger, but tried to listen - after all, she was the smart one for a reason.

"If you want Harry, you have to kill all three of us," Ron shouted, standing up and grabbing Harry's arm for support.

"There'll be only one murder here tonight," Sirius said, his grin widening at the thought.

Harry blacked out, shouting about his parents and the muggles, when he came too, his hands were hitting at Sirius, but Sirius' own hand wrapped around Harry's neck.

Sirius Black let go with a grunt as Hermione's foot swung out of nowhere. The wands fell to the floor, but as Harry dived, he missed them. Clearly his skills only worked when he was on a broomstick.

He managed to grab his wand and pointed it at Sirius.

"Going to kill me, Harry?"

...oOo...

"We're up here," Hermione screamed as they heard footsteps downstairs. "Sirius Black is here! Help us!"

The door flew open, leaving Remus Lupin standing there. His gaze moved over the group, where Hermione was cowering near the bed, to Ron who had passed out from the pain of a broken leg, to Harry, whose wand was raised in Sirius' direction, and finally towards Sirius Black.

He looked the escaped prisoner over, licking his lips in the process, a flicker of a smile appeared on Sirius' lips.

It was seconds before Remus had taken the wands. "Where is he, Sirius?"

Sirius slowly lifted his hand, pointing at Ron.

Remus Lupin stared at Sirius so intently, that Hermione and Harry felt like they were intruding on a private moment. It was the way the older boys looked at their girlfriends or boyfriends before disappearing for hours.

"But then… why hasn't he shown himself before now? Unless he was the one… unless you switched without telling me?"

Sirius nodded his head, his eyes never leaving Remus'.

"Professor?" Harry interrupted.

Harry never got to ask anything else, as his eyes widened at the sight of Remus lowering his wand, the Professor's eyes fixed on Sirius. Remus walked towards Sirius, his hand out. He pulled the man up and embraced him.

The pair were stunned into silence by the hug, and even more so by the way Sirius Black's hand moved down to squeeze their Professor's arse.

"I don't believe it," Hermione screeched, getting up from the floor and storming over to them. "You… you and him!"

Her gaze fell on the hand on her Professor's behind, before she moved her accusing eyes back up to him. "I didn't tell anyone, I've been covering up for you!"

"Hermione, calm down! Listen to me, please. I can explain -"

"I trusted you, and you've been his friend."

Hermione, Remus and Sirius all looked at Harry.

"You're wrong," Remus said softly. "I haven't been his friend in a very long time. Let me explain -"

"Trust me, I'm a lot more than that," Sirius croaked, laughing. "Not much to explain really, apart from we like to shag each other… a lot."

"That is highly inappropriate conversation around a thirteen year old," Hermione retorted. "Harry, don't trust them… Professor Lupin has been helping Black get into the castle. He wants you dead too. He's a -"

"Werewolf?" Harry asked.

"Worse," Hermione whispered. "He's a Chudley Cannons fan!"

There was a ringing silence and everyone stared at Remus, who looked quite calm, though rather pale.

"Still?" Sirius croaked out, removing his hand. "And we were doing so well to get you to support the Magpies."

"I'm sorry," Remus whispered. "When I lost you… I couldn't help but take up the old team again." He turned to Hermione. "I'm sorry, Miss Granger. You're not up to your usual standards. You have that wrong!"

"Wrong?" Hermione shouted. "I'm never wrong."

"I have not been helping Sirius get into the castle, and I certainly don't want Harry dead." An odd shiver passed over his face. "But I am a supporter of the Cannons. How long have you known?"

"Since Professor Snape set the quiz that had nothing to do with either potions or Defence Against The Dark Arts," Hermione said. "The 'how to spot a Cannons fan' quiz. At first I was worried that people would find out about Ron, but then… It started to make sense. You kept disappearing on the evenings when they were playing their games. You seemed so upset after each one, which made sense, considering they lost so often."

"You are the cleverest witch of your age I've ever met," Remus told her with a forced laugh.

...oOo...

Ron, Harry and Hermione each clutched their wands, staring at Remus in suspicion. Ron had only just woken, and wasn't sure what was happening, so he just trusted Hermione's suspicious glare.

After all, she was the smart one.

"There. You're armed, we're not. Please listen to us. I followed the map -"

"You know how to work it?"

"Of course," Remus said. "I helped write it. I'm Moony."

"Moony because of the full moon?" Harry asked.

"Harry, people don't care I'm a Werewolf. It's quite obvious with me going away for the full moon, honestly, I think you're the last person to work that one out. No, it's because I moon over my favourite team."

"So… Padfoot, Wormtail and Prongs?"

"Padfoot - that's me," Sirius replied, proudly.

"I watched you on the map, when you left Hagrid's, you had someone else with you. I thought the map had broken, but I watched as the two of you were dragged by Sirius under the tree."

He turned to Sirius. "Nice work," he said, impressed.

Sirius preened at the compliment.

"Prongs was the third member, that was your father, Harry. The last… well, that was Wormtail - Peter Pettigrew. Ron, could I take a look at your worm?"

"What kind of question is that, you're a Professor," Ron squealed.

Remus looked repulsed. "I meant the pet worm that you are carrying around with you."

Sirius glared at Ron, making Ron cower. A protective arm was wrapped around Remus' waist in a loving gesture.

"Oh. Right." Ron withdrew the worm. "He's a bit squashed I think," Ron said, holding up the worm and frowning. "What has Wormy got to do with anything?"

"That's not a worm," Sirius croaked suddenly. "I'd recognise that worm anywhere. He's an Animagus by the name of Peter Pettigrew."

"Wormtail… is a worm?" Harry whispered. It all began to make sense.


Bad Movie Tuesday - Parody, "Let's hope you're not violently murdered, too."

Ultimate Battle - (Normal) Vegetable Wings price: 500 words or more of crack

Game of Life - Hidden

Quidditch Pitch - Blood was splattered on every wall in the room.