So...like I promised, here's the first of my Phantom Hourglass kiss scenes! But first, the laziest author's note I've ever written!
Phantom Hourglass, like all the Zelda games, wouldn't be possible without the hard work of all the people at Nintendo.
Also, if you like this scene, or have an idea to make better kiss scenes in general, please leave a review down at the bottom.
There! Now, I hope y'all enjoy!
"All right, lads, that's it...Just a little farther…" Linebeck's voice reverberated painfully loudly off the close wooden walls of his steam ship's hold. Near the bottom of the gangway, a trio of dockhands were hefting a large crate, bringing it into the hold. That crate, Linebeck knew, was packed to the brim with vital hardware for maintaining his craft - which really only meant repairing it after encounters with hostile sea life and the occasional run-in with Jolene, the pirate who seemed so intent on making as much havoc of his life as she could.
Fortunately, only the latter of those two problems remained. After the incident where he'd been caught up in that young hero Link's quest to save his lady friend, all the monsters that had been plaguing the seas had rather suddenly disappeared (he imagined that great squid monster's death at Link's hands had something to do with it). In fact, even Jolene wasn't quite as much of a problem as she'd been in times past. She'd been attacking him far less frequently, and the times she did, he'd been able to get away more easily (yet another bright side to ferrying Link around - the lad had quite generously helped him buy several upgrades to the engines of his vessel). Thus, he only needed the one crate.
Said crate gave a heavy thunk! as the dockhands dropped it into place where he'd directed them. With a smile, he placed several rupees in each of their hands, and they went up the gangway, leaving him there in the hold. He stood there a few moments as he heard their footsteps crossing the deck before rattling down the gangplank onto the docks at Mercay's port.
Then Linebeck moved to the crate. As he pried off the lid, he noted with approval how the loose tools had been placed on top of the stacks of planking and jars of caulk; he'd want to hang up those tools right away so they'd be handy next time he needed them. So he blithely set to it, and after several minutes, most of them were in their respective places on the wall of the hold.
He had just picked up the last of the tools - a large, hefty pipe wrench - when a muffled voice came from absolutely nowhere: "This barrel sure is stuffy, y'know."
Linebeck spun, hefting the wrench to ward off what he feared might be an assailant. There was no one in sight, though. He was alone in the hold.
"I'm in the barrel, you goofball," came the voice again, "the one you always hide in."
Linebeck nearly dropped the wrench in shock as his gaze snapped to the solitary, unassuming barrel in that room. Yes, he used it as a hiding place, but only whenever Jolene managed to board his ship. The only person that should even know about it was Link, and that voice sounded nothing like his. Warily, he approached the barrel, wrench still raised for a fight and, ever so cautiously, lifted the lid.
He sprang back as none other than Jolene leapt out with a double frontflip, made even more impressive in light of the fact that the cutlass she wore at her hip should have caught on something mid-jump.
Wait…
Why was it sheathed? Shouldn't it have been in her hand?
But he brushed the thought aside as he weighed his chances should she pull the sharp blade out of its scabbard. She was a bloody good swordsman, far better than himself without a doubt. His only chance lay in swinging the wrench as soon as she drew on him; sure, she could undoubtedly block a strike, but that wrench was probably heavy enough to mess up her blade in one good blow.
And then his thoughts were halted when the tanned pirate said, "Word around the islands says that little bodyguard you took on helped you grow a spine."
Linebeck faltered. What? Did she just...compliment him?
Jolene seemed to sense his confusion and elaborated, "Some fellow down at the pub said he saw that old ghost ship a couple months back. There was some massive squid creature on it, and you and the lad and...a statue of a girl? Whatever...anyway, he said he saw you pick up a fancy-looking sword the boy had dropped and jab it into one of that squid monster's tentacles."
Linebeck's eyes went wide. He remembered the incident all too well. Though it seemed Jolene's source had failed to mention how the monster had quickly overwhelmed and possessed his body for a time. That had not been at all a pleasant experience. But yes, he had actually stood up to the thing. Weakly he nodded, answering, "Well...yeah...that...did happen." His response really sounded more like a question than an actual statement, but it was the best he could muster through his shock and trepidation.
Jolene's glossy black eyes flicked up to the wrench for a moment. "Would you mind putting that thing down?" she asked. "I'm not here to pick a fight."
For a moment neither of them moved. Then Linebeck's mind managed to process what his tormentor had just said, and with a nod he hurried to place the wrench on the pegs he'd driven into the wall to hold it. Then, facing her once again, he gathered up the courage to ask, "Might I ask why you're here? I assume it's not just to tell me you heard about what happened."
Jolene nodded pensively, taking a step towards him. "You're right," she replied. "I also wanted to say...that I'm proud of you. And I suppose I'd better tell you why I've been tracking you down these last couple years."
Linebeck's head was reeling. First of all, hearing Jolene, of all people, say she was proud of him felt foreign to him. And then, he thought he already knew why she was after him. He had made off with a rather valuable jewel when he'd departed her company two years back.
In fact, he now brought this up: "I'm...You're right about one thing. Having Link aboard has been good for me. I...truly am sorry about that jewel now."
Jolene blinked. Then she facepalmed with an exasperated sigh. "I'm not talking about the jewel, Linebeck," she said. "Were you really so oblivious back then? There was something else you took...And no, it wasn't a physical thing. Did you really have no idea?"
Linebeck was beginning to panic now as Jolene was approaching him. "I-i-i-...can't think of anything else, no...What else could I have stolen?"
The pirate stopped just short of him, her expression practically screaming, I can't believe you're this dense. After a few moments, she finally spoke: "Try...my heart."
For a moment, Linebeck didn't get it. He blinked, spluttering out, "What? Your h-...How could I have st...oh...wait?...Oh...But that m...What?!" His face heated up quickly as he realized exactly what Jolene was implying. Of course, that didn't mean he wasn't still utterly baffled.
Jolene rolled her eyes, approaching him again. "Oh, come on," she chided, "it can't be that hard to understand. The two of us, alone together on the high seas, searching for priceless treasure? How is it this much of a surprise that I fell for you?"
"But why me?" Linebeck asked in disbelief. "I was just as much a coward back then as I am now. And even after this whole thing with Link, I'm still scared of a lot."
"Yes, I know," Jolene replied gently, now standing right in front of him, eye-to-eye. "Which is why I want to help you. Even I get scared sometimes, but I know how to deal with my fears. I want to help you deal with yours."
That came as a surprise to Linebeck, who rather shyly mumbled, "Oh...uh...thanks. I...probably need that."
Jolene smirked, glad the man she'd fallen for was acknowledging how much room he still had to grow, and, by the sound of it, accepting her offer of help. "Good," she said simply. "I think I'll start right now."
Without another word, she grabbed the lapels of Linebeck's jacket and pulled him up against her, pressing her lips to his.
It took a few seconds for Linebeck to figure out what was happening, then another for him to decide that a relationship with the pirate might actually be pretty nice. And then he actually returned her kiss, hands coming to rest on her waist.
As they pulled away, Linebeck noticed Jolene had a smirk on her face. Her next words brought a chuckle from him: "Looks like we took care of that fear pretty quick!"
