RORY REWRITES HISTORY
Krypto barked his approval when Rory showed the shiny diamond ring to his dog. Krypto didn't even berate Rory for missing his Saturday walk! Krypto knew some of the peculiarities of human beings; love, engagements, and weddings. After all, Krypto remembered some sort of noise about Ethan and Sarah the year before.
Rory was atypically cautious with the diamond ring. He looked around the room, and quickly locked the ring in his bottom desk drawer along with some blueprints he had been working on the week before.
Rory's home office was the smaller of the two bedrooms, and opened on a tiny balcony just big enough for the propane barbeque Rory had been thinking of getting (barbeques are what Canadians often use their balconies for, even in walk-up apartments).
It was a little work renting a plane this time of year, not to mention doing it online on a Saturday night. But Rory was able to get a two-seater at an aerodrome near Barrie. And he got a discount! The two-hours rental was costing him "only" $250.00 for two hours flying time.
"I hope Dad never comes around and audits this weekend" Rory told Krypto wryly.
That had Rory thinking. Rory had previously mulled calling his pals for advice; he knew they (Benny especially) would suggest girl-winning techniques. But Rory was so head-over-heels in love with Natalie he decided that it was just wrong to talk things over with his buds (in spite of the fact Natalie's brother had butted in already). It was Rory and only Rory who would be proposing to Natalie!
"Yeah, anyway" Rory added aloud to Krypto. "Ethan works so slow that it took him almost two years to ask Sarah out. That happened before I got you pal! And Benny . . . his advice almost never works for me. But what about Mom and Dad? I gotta tell them what I've been planning."
Krypto knew the words "Mom and Dad". He stood on his hind legs and licked Rory's face.
"That's right, dude" Rory said. "Mom and Dad. But I think, uh, Dad instead of Mom."
But even Rory knew you don't talk proposing to your girl with your Mom.
Rory first tried to contact his Dad by Skype. He couldn't. Rory remembered his Dad usually turned off his smartphone on long weekends.
With a frown, Rory dialed his old landline number. Luckily, it was Rory's father who picked up the phone.
Rory mentally pictured his father (a recent family photo alternated in a digital frame on the wall, so Rory needn't have made the effort). A now white-haired man with glasses, auditing the boring books of boring bankrupt companies. And writing reports so full of pointless figures that it made your eyes bleed reading through them.
Rory had inherited his near sightedness, asthma, and looks from his Dad, but his energy came from his Mom. While Rory loved to talk sci-fi with his Dad, most of the time, Rory knew, the elder Mr. Keener was a calm, quiet man.
Rory, characteristically unsmooth, bluntly introduced the big news.
"Dad" said Rory eagerly. "I'm going to propose to the girl of my dreams on Monday!"
There was a pause.
"Dad?"
"Are you joking Rory?"
"No, Dad" said Rory. "Seriously. Did you get my text and my email?"
Another pause.
"Tell me about her, Rory."
Rory did, carefully leaving out the part about sleeping with her the night before. And the confrontation with Natalie's brother. Though, for all Rory knew, his Dad may have guessed one or both.
Rory's Dad did little but listen, except audibly coughing when Rory mentioned the price of the engagement ring.
"You went by the two-month rule" he said.
"Yeah, that's what they said I should do at the store."
"Do you know her ring size?"
"I went by my pinkie on my left hand" said Rory proudly. "I figured that out on my own."
Finally, Rory's father gave his advice.
"I fell for your mother like you fell for Natalie" said Rory's father at long last.
"When she saved you from being beat up" said Rory eagerly, as he loved the story. "With her awesome right-hook. Man, I wish I could punch like that!"
"I wish I could too . . . but I waited almost two years before I proposed" said Rory's father reflectively.
"You were still in school at Western" Rory reminded his Dad.
"Don't you think you're going too fast?"
"No way! I love her . . . more than any girl. I feel like I already know her. You can't imagine how much fun we're having together! Besides, Dad . . . she's the hottest girl I've ever met."
"It takes more than hotness to make a marriage."
"But she's . . . awesome."
"I know you Rory" said his father with a sigh. "You feel you have to ask her now. If the girl is everything you say and she says, I think she will say yes."
"Awesome!" said Rory.
"But Rory. . . she knows you have a good job" said Rory's father. "Have you considered that she might want to be with you for your money?"
"THAT's BOGUS . . . uh, Dad!" said Rory, who was so agitated he jumped up off the chair and surprised Krypto.
"You might consider it" said Rory's father.
"It's just because you deal with balance books all the time!" Rory objected.
"It's a lesson in life."
"But Dad! I could hear this stuff if I asked Brunner for advice instead of you."
Rory silently steamed as his father warned of child support, spousal support and division of the matrimonial home.
"I hope she's the one" said Rory's father at last. "But forget there is such a thing as divorce for a minute."
"You didn't mention anything else but divorce!" said Rory petulantly.
"Rory! Just ask yourself again if you're sure that this is the girl you want to spend your life with?
"Yeah it is!" said Rory. "Just looking at her . . . just talking to her . . . makes me want to float on air."
Krypto looked at Rory.
"And there's nothing weird about it" added Rory, petting Krypto. "I don't mean it literally."
"Then there's nothing else that I can do but wish you good luck on Monday."
"Thanks Dad!"
"Whatever you do, don't elope" added the elder Mr. Keener. "Your mother will kill you if you do."
After the call, Rory stretched and looked very confident.
"Everything's set up" Rory said. "And you know, my Dad's really cool. Mom too."
Rory considered his long-weekend "game-plan". Another day of fun at Niagara. A flight on Victoria Day with the ring. Was there anything more to do, to say? No, Natalie even knew about the monster hunting and Team Sabre! Well, sort of. Rory's life story was an open book . . . except . . . ."
"That's ancient history" Rory sulkily told Krypto. "By the time I got you, Lucifractor-explosion-night was four months old . . . and I was long back to normal already. All you ever knew of me as a bloodsucker was that pair of dirty socks I had way under my bed. And because you've always been an awesome evil-detecting dog, from a puppy, you smelt the vampire sweat on them and ripped them to shreds."
Krypto whined.
"I know" said Rory earnestly, petting Krypto. "I couldn't help smelling like a vamp, and you wouldn't have been able to help chasing me away. Well, I can have a secret . . . even from Natalie. Who says I can't! I'll just ask no one to tell her. And . . . someday I'm even going to show her the Team Sabre case-files."
Rory rifled into a desk drawer and pulled out a flash-drive.
Some months after the Lucifractor sent its dark-energy destroying wave through Whitechapel, Ethan had suggested putting all their cases on file. Short summaries as to what supernatural creature or force they had dealt with, what it was doing, and how it was defeated. Once in a while it was someone or something supernatural that needed to be helped instead of defeated, but the idea of recording their particulars and the adventure's outcome remained sound.
"There's a secret manuscript Ethan keeps to himself" Rory told Krypto, as he cruised the summaries down to a very short, cryptic note labelled "Case of Counterfeit Curses: Stephanie/Witch/Sale of Soul/ Demons /Evil Twins/Deadly Invisibility Spells/ Wyndego / Jesse Black/Pocket Dimension. "This paragraph just says that all that evil was pwned by the forces of good. But Ethan's real long record that says everything. Hidden somewhere. Some hundred or two hundred pages of what happened those weeks; the second time he got turned into a werewolf. I mean, I understand the dude. I remember how gnarly that was for Ethan. We both remember, Krypto. It took a lot out of Ethan . . . he doesn't think about it, or talk about it. Not to me, not to Benny, not even to Sarah. I think not even to Benny or Sarah. Even though Benny was a brain-munching zombie the whole time Ehan was a werewolf."
Krypto didn't understand what Rory was talking about, so he simply looked at his master.
"You know, it would have way been more cool for me if I had fought side-by-side with my bros and Sarah from the very start" said Rory, wistfully. "As Human Rory. Sometime Natalie's going to know we really do fight supernatural monsters. And I'm going to show this to her. But I'm going to change the records – they're not going to say I was ever a vamp. I'm going to rewrite the first year and ten months of our monster-fighting history. First with my copy, then maybe I'll change the shared file online."
Rory was slightly disappointed when Krypto lay down and seemed to go to sleep.
"At least you're still here, Krypto! Well, listen to this, dude! I never looked through the first twenty-six summaries. Man, this is going to take some work to sort out."
It wasn't as hard as Rory expected. Ethan had written most of the briefs. Ethan hadn't any interest in repeating over and over that Rory had been a vampire. Ethan didn't mention it at all (nor did he like to mention Sarah had been a vampire) - except for where it was important to the story.
"Ethan liked to pwn Erica though" said Rory, mystified. "That's not like you buddy? Oh yeah, I remember why. When you were writing this, Ethan, you were still angry-bitter about Erica sabotaging your first date with Sarah!"
But Rory, to his disappointment, discovered he hadn't even been involved in several of the adventures of the first two years. Or, at least, he had played only a minor role. Even now, Rory was unclear about some things.
For example, Rory burst into laughter when he discovered Benny and Ethan had disguised themselves as girls to spy on the cheerleaders and "protect" Stephanie from Erica. Yet Rory still didn't make the connection between Benny and Betty and Ethan and Veronica. Fortunately, Rory had long forgotten his brief crush on "Betty".
One of Rory's faults was that although he could be self-effacing, he also liked to brag. Especially if he wanted to impress a girl. And this seeped through to Rory's "updated summaries".
Rory's largest rewrite was on the very first adventure. In Rory's new version, he had still been invited to Jesse's mansion for the party. Rory had still gone. But now Rory was a spy, who knew something was off as soon as he got there.! Rory tried to alert Erica, but she stubbornly ignored him as an insignificant "Grade 9 newb." The last Rory saw of her, she was leaving the room with Gord! Yet, Rory knew he couldn't go home, although he was in mortal danger! His job was to stay and listen! He eavesdropped, undetected by Jesse. You could imagine Rory's shock when he discovered his host was a vampire intent on reanimating his evil undead followers! Rory snuck out without being bitten, and reported everything to Ethan and Benny. Rory was introduced to Sarah, and swore vengeance on Jesse for what he had done to her! Team Sabre plotted, and they met the vamps on the field of battle at the Westdale Theatre.
And on it went . . . .
Rory finished his "updates" about an hour later, figuring this was a perfect end to a perfect day.
