Last Kiss

Christian stared at the Christmas card in his hand, one of Anastasia nude in his unbuttoned shirt as it only just covered her nipples. Her long silky brunette hair spanned out behind her on the white bedding, and her hips twisted to the side just enough to cover her naked sex. The hem of the shirt barely left anything for imagination as the tailored shirt accentuated her round ass cheeks against the curvature of her spine.

That lip bite just about brought him to his knees each time his eyes refocused back on her face as they locked with hers through the printed photo. He was hard as a granite just thinking about the position that she was in, even her toes were attractive and a huge turn on for him.

He knew it was lust that he was feeling but he had never lusted after someone as much as he did her. She was so desirable that he couldn't even begin to explain with words in the human language.

The back of the card had a simple line wishing him good luck in the upcoming years in his business and life in general, as well as a kiss with a winking face behind her signature. She didn't even have to spell it out to him for him to know that it was the most invaluable parting gift that she could possibly give him, and he had cherished it since he laid eyes on it.

If he had shown this to his brother then he'd most definitely be told that this girl was looking for an attachment but he was already told in the face that she loved him. The only problem wasn't to do with the fact that he wouldn't be on the East Coast, but more to do with the fact that he wasn't on the same page as her.

It had been a whole year since he brought home one of the best presents he had ever bought for his parents, and he didn't exactly pay money for it.

Anastasia's personalized autographs hang proudly on display in their family room, and his siblings even made duplicates of the original thing and blew it up just so it could be hung on the walls in their room.

It wasn't even his idea to give them something this precious and invaluable but he couldn't help but feel pride when he saw the glee in their eyes and their actions as they skipped over to thank him, as well as forcing him to text her just to express their appreciation for such a simple gift.

He laid the card back down and pushed the desk drawer back in so all the happy memory vanished, leaving him in a cold room surrounded by minimal furniture and the feeling of pure loneliness. He had always been a person that would prefer to stick by himself, but this year he felt particularly isolated.

Elena gave him the money last year under the guise of a Christmas present, but Anastasia's absentminded comment about it being hush money was now at the forefront of his mind as his eyes landed on the copies of other pictures, vividly depicting him in compromising and vulnerable forms, willingly partaking in a sexual act with someone.

He didn't have to return the loan because it wasn't a loan, but he still did, and during his attempt to keep himself out of any kind of debt, he had miscalculated.

When he set out to pursue his own future last year, he envisioned himself to be sitting on a pile of cash not to be buried under. He had failed epically, and the only thing he succeeded in was becoming a Dominant, and even now, he couldn't feel the pride that came with this accomplishment.

He truly thought he could have it all.

Then, when he refused to contract any of the subs that Elena had recommended, and proceeded to cut all ties and sever all communications with her as he paid her the last portion of the hundred grand, she struck again.

This time, she didn't present him with money, instead, she presented him with pictures. It still got his attention just like she did with the cash last time.

Ros was beyond furious that they had managed to squander away the rest of the money once they had paid Elena back without interest. She had told him in not so many words that she'd be returning to school full-time to resume her degree, and if he still wanted to work with her, then he'd better wait until she got her diploma.

To say that he wasn't the least bit welcomed in his family was probably the understatement of the year. He was already on a rocky path when he insisted on dropping out of school without having gained an ounce of his parents' support, and he thought that Elena had his back, but he soon realized that all she had was control over him.

He ran back to her like a bitch when she dangled that hundred grand underneath his nose, letting him get a waft of smell of the greenbacks only to demand that he pay her back with interest.

It was obviously hush money but he had realized it a beat too late, and now that he was facing another dilemma as she played him like a fine-tuned violin by waving a stack of photos in his face. They were authentic alright, and he soon figured out that she had deliberately excluded all the pictures that she had secretly taken from before he reached the age of consent.

He hadn't got a penny left to his name and the only reason he still had a roof over his head was because his brother was kind enough to take him in.

He refused to return to Harvard not only because his ego wouldn't allow him to, but he still stood by his statement when he said that college was a waste of resources and it would be a stupid idea for him to go back when he could have all the money in the world if only he was given a second chance.

There were a few people that he knew of would have the kind of money to support and fund him, and the easiest and most obvious option was his parents or grandparents, however if he did grow a pair and went to them knowing he'd face more than just criticism, disappointments, and quite possibly rejections, he'd have to explain how and why he and Elena had a fallout.

Or more importantly, why nothing worked out, and why he failed so epically.

If he had managed to obtain a new investor, he wasn't quite sure if Elena wouldn't act on her threat to expose him and his heavy involvement in the taboo lifestyle by leaking the images. He couldn't trust her to take care of his nails let alone his entire life.

However, if he actually thought about it, there was one more person that he could turn to if only he could swallow his pride.

And, said person was currently on TV with an interview from some time ago playing in the entertainment section of the program.

Pride or ego, he would have to swallow it in order to get rid of the thorn in his side that had the name of Elena Lincoln, and after weighing his options, he realized that the only person that would never ever pass a single judgment no matter how pathetic he had been would be this celebrity currently promoting her latest project and wishing everyone a Merry Christmas.

Fucking festive motherfuckers! He cursed in his head as he growled to himself when he saw everyone else letting loose after a year of stressful hard work. They had all accomplished something, even if it was just a small portion to their end goal, but he had been moving backward, heading in the complete opposite direction of where everyone else seemed to be going.

He felt like an utter loser.

Picking up his phone, he let his finger hover over her contact information as he hesitated. He hadn't talked to her in over half a year, and he didn't even know where she was or what she was doing for the holiday. Hell, he didn't even know what to say to her, where to start with his situation.

She had so much faith in him before they parted ways but he couldn't even locate even just one percent of that confidence at the moment to tell her that he could succeed if he had the money. He was looking at one of the highest paid actresses in the country, and the finest model that happened to fashion brands.

After three shots burnt down his chest, he dialed the number.

…

"Kate!" Anastasia screeched when her childhood best friend and roommate barged into her room without so much as a verbal warning let alone a knock.

"What? It's not like you're masturbating or having some guy over."

The brunette rolled her eyes as her hands subtly covered the festive card on the table and quietly moved it until it's in her drawer. If Kate had seen anything, she didn't say it.

"What are you doing?" She asked warily, they were in New York on Christmas Eve not because their family was there but because they thought they could surprise Ethan and spend the holiday with his new family.

However, what they didn't count on was him taking his new family out on a vacation to somewhere tropical.

"What are we going to do for Christmas? My parents are asking because my grandparents asked," Kate rolled her eyes at her overbearing family members. They were paying extra attention to her after her brother got married last Thanksgiving, and now had a child on the way.

Not a shotgun wedding my ass.

"I don't know," she shrugged. It wasn't like Anastasia had been spending more time back home in Seattle lately anyway, her job had been pulling her by the nose forcing her to basically live in New York just because most of the shit was taking place there.

She had even thought about asking her agent if she could just move to Hollywood, but nope, each time she wanted to say just stay in Los Angeles when she was there, they got a call to invite them to some shit over at the Big Apples.

Kate had wanted to relocate to New York after they both graduated from Harvard since it was one of the busiest cities in the country, and she loved crowds.

"Should we go somewhere last minute? Have like a destination vacation?" Kate threw herself on her sofa and her fingers drummed against the leather armrest.

"Where? I want to go somewhere tropical and warm if we're traveling."

"Do you want to go out of the country or stay in?"

"I don't mind," she shrugged. Now she just really wanted her blonde friend to get out of the room so she could work on the only card that she hadn't sent out even though it probably wouldn't even arrive on Christmas Day at this rate. She was just hesitant.

"Okay, I'll think about it," Kate took the hint that she was no longer welcomed in the room. "Holler when you come up with something."

"I will!" Anastasia promised and watched her best friend close the door behind her before picking up the card to put on the finishing touches.

Her phone rang right when she lifted her pen away from the card after one final stroke, and she answered it thinking it was just another associate of hers calling to wish her a happy holiday.

"Hello?" She said into the device held against her ear as her eyes scanned the Christmas card from head to toe.

"Ana…" the voice. That voice, she froze.

She wouldn't mistake it anywhere for anyone's. It had been a year since their arrangement ended but she couldn't control her feelings no matter how much she wanted to move on.

She had been waiting to hear his voice, to hear from him, in any way she could even if it was through the television news, to hear about his success but he never called. She contemplated texting him over Thanksgiving but thought otherwise. She didn't want to hog his time as she had always been the one that had strong feelings for him and not the other way around.

Her lips still tingled whenever she recalled that last searing goodbye kiss they shared at her apartment door in Cambridge, but she knew that she couldn't just sit around and wait for him to turn around because it may never happen.

She wasn't trying to forget him but she had been trying to cultivate relationships with other people. It just never felt right for some reason.

"Christian," she breathed his name, the first time she had said it out loud in over six months. "Are you okay?" You don't sound happy, she frowned with concern.

"I'm…" his automatic response would be dismissing anyone's worry because he was starting to think that everyone around him was trying to pity him as the kid who failed his ambitious and unreachable plan, and wasted all the money he ripped off from his parents.

"Christian?" She prompted softly, her heart jumping to her throat with anxiety and excitement. "Where are you?"

"Seattle."

"Are you drinking, Christian? It's three in the afternoon over there."

"I failed, Ana," he whispered after he threw the rest of the dark liquid in his glass down his throat.

"What are you talking about? Are you alone?"

"Ana, I'm so sorry."

"I don't understand, Christian. Are you okay? Are you hurt? What's going on?"

She was met with silence, and she wouldn't be surprised if she started hearing the beep indicating that he had hung up in the next second.

"Christian, you called me, so talk to me." She prodded gently just enough to make him feel her beseeching him, hoping he could feel that she cared and she would never judge him but only support him in every choice that he was making.

"Can I tell you something?"

"Of course."

"Will you judge me?"

"Never, Christian."

"Here's the truth, Ana. I'm broke and being blackmailed."

"You're being blackmailed?"

"Did you also not hear that I'm broke?"

"Yes, but why are you being blackmailed?" She asked carefully, hoping that she wasn't being stupid for missing a detail so that he would have to repeat himself.

She knew that the business world would be ruthless, and there would be no friendship, only benefits and personal gains. You could only make enemies or acquaintances, there wouldn't be a teammate. You were all on your own.

"Elena."

She was confused now. She would've thought he got fucked over by some bald callous ruler of some shitty ass empire that they call a corporation, making him lose everything that he had worked hard for.

"What did she do?"

"Ana, you can't tell anyone about this. I'm sorry I called you on Christmas Eve when you must be with your loved ones celebrating and relaxing, but you're the only one that knew about the true nature of me and Elena's relationship…" he rambled on and she didn't know if it would be polite to interrupt him with her reassurances.

"I'd never sell you out, Christian. There is a reason why no one knew that we're even friends."

She could hear his heavy breathing on the other end, and she could almost feel the loneliness seep through the speakers as her heart clenched for him.

"Just tell me, Christian. I can come over if you want me to."

"No," he declined quickly. "I can never ask you to do that, you've already done so much for me… don't think I've overlooked all the small gestures from you."

She smiled at the memory, little did he know, she'd do anything for him if only he said the words. She was in too deep, and she had tried to refrain herself last year, but she couldn't help but cross the line and into girlfriend mode from time to time just so she could take care of him.

It was the insignificant things that she did that she thought he wouldn't notice, like how she would offer to refill his coffee cup whenever he was over even though he was perfectly capable of walking the few steps to the kitchen; or she would always reserve that same mug for him. The more significant one being giving him the autograph of his favorite actor on a DVD. She could easily secure the resources but it meant so much more to him.

"What did she blackmail you with?" She asked gently, her voice soft like silk and he felt so much safer being wrapped in that texture.

"Pictures. She has photographs of me."

"Of you… as a sub?" She articulated carefully, choosing her words with utmost cautious as to not cause him more distress.

"Of me in compromising and vulnerable positions, exposed to anyone who looked at the frame."

"Is she in any of them?"

"No, just her dungeon."

"I'm so sorry, Christian…" she sighed with regret, her heart sank further down to her stomach as her eyes glanced at the card on the table. It now seemed childish and stupid as she wished him a Merry Christmas but he was stewing in his own failure all alone. "Do you want me to come over?"

"I'd never ask you to do that, Ana. You should enjoy the holiday with your friends and family."

"My family is in Seattle, baby," she bit her lip as the term slipped out of her mouth. She just felt so bad for him that all she wanted to do was hug him and cuddle him until he felt better.

"Will you be visiting them over the holiday, then?"

"Yes," she agreed readily even though that wasn't the plan. "Yes, I will be visiting."

He nodded but she couldn't see him, and he made no attempt to verbalize his gesture.

"Christian," she called after a moment of silence.

"Hmm?" Even his voice shook, his vulnerability couldn't be more on display, and she was glad that he was willing to let his guard down around her.

"Are you still drinking?"

"No," he lied just as he poured another two fingers into the glass.

"Okay," she believed him and that suddenly made him feel like the biggest jerk in the world, so after a beat of internal debating, he poured the liquid back into the tumbler, ignoring the fact that it was unhygienic.

"When will you be here?"

"Boxing Day. I'm taking you gift shopping." In Vancouver, Canada. She smirked, knowing that he was in for a surprise.

"Ana…" he wanted to remind her that he just lost everything, and he didn't even plan on showing up at his parents house in spite of the wholehearted invitation from them.

He was ashamed of himself and the last thing he could do was sit there and eat everything they've prepared for free, feeling like he was taking advantage of people that didn't deserve to be used like that.

"Deal or no deal?" She challenged, and even at his lowest, a small smile tugged his lips upward as he imagined the look in her eyes as she feigned a glare at him daring him to deny her.

"Deal," he whispered back with a light chuckle.

…

If he could, Luke Sawyer would really want to knock it in her head that she couldn't just up and leave in a day's notice to fly across the country for some guy she hadn't seen in a year, and never reciprocated her feelings.

He really wanted to scream in her face and point out just how pathetic it would look, but he had learned it the hard way that when it came to this particular man who was nothing special, there was no stopping her.

"You're in too deep, Ana," he shook his head and sighed.

"Don't you think I know that?" She rubbed her face as she pulled her hood over her head and shrank into her seat.

"You're only nineteen."

"But I have the ability to help him. I'm capable of offering him a springboard that's called a startup capital."

"Are you seriously going to coddle him? What if he squanders away your fund, too? Are you going to throw in more? You only make so much, Ana."

"I know that, but I believe he can do it the second time. If he can't then I'd leave knowing that I'd at least tried and contributed my worth."

"Just to sooth your conscience?"

"Whatever…" she mumbled, because truth was, she had no idea if it was healthy for her to become this obsessed. "Has anyone recognized me yet?"

"No, there will be a car on the tarmac waiting for us."

She lifted her head slightly at her security.

"Since when do I get the royal treatment?"

"Since your campaign for whatever your latest hair product was went viral." He rolled his eyes sarcastically, he was going to rub it in her one more time by telling her that because her last minute decision didn't leave him enough time to arrange security, he had to call the airport for clearance.

"It did?" She knitted her eyebrows together in confusion.

He nodded and turned his head to the aisle, indicating that he was done talking to her. She scoffed, they had more of a sibling relationship than an employer/employee relationship as they had been working together since she was a teenager, and he was a friend of her father's.

"Stop fidgeting, Jesus, Ana!"

"You're so cranky today, Luke."

"Of course I am! You specifically told me that you'd be staying in the apartment the entire Christmas, and here you are making a trip across the country a day later."

"You're just pissed that you've missed out on hot girls," she huffed. "Don't tell me you're still seeing that chick from two months ago."

"Her name's Hannah and I asked her out, and we made plans to go to a carnival today yet I'm being dragged to the opposite coast early in the morning. I didn't even get a chance to tell her in person."

She stared at him, and watched his expression carefully, because the last time he gave her an impassioned speech about some girl to guilt trip her into doing something, she gave in only to realize that it was a prank.

"Show me the tickets you bought for the carnival."

"I swear to god, Steele, I am absolutely serious."

"Does she know that you work for me?"

"No, and don't even think about sending her something on my behalf. You are not allowed to reveal your identity."

She scowled at him in annoyance, mostly at his tone than anything else.

"Well, what can I do to make it up to you then?"

"I'll think of something," he shrugged.

She narrowed her eyes at him skeptically, but when she saw his phone light up with a notification informing them that the car on the tarmac was ready for them, she saw a selfie of him and a girl together. That was when she realized that maybe he really did like the girl.

"Do you know where Christian lives?" She asked once they were in the car en route her parents' place.

"For fuck's sake, woman, stop stalking him and just ask the guy!"

"I did! Oh my god, will you please stop yelling at me! I get that you're angry at my last minute change of plans and I promise I'll stay put on New Year's Eve just so you can fly back and surprise your girl."

"Just give me the address."

And the conversation was over once again with her handing him her phone.

"What does Hannah like?"

"Shoes."

"Stilettos?"

He nodded as he relayed the address to the driver.

"Give her one of my gift cards to Prada or whatever brand she likes since buying her a pair would indicate another level of commitment. Put it in an envelope and include a card explaining why you bailed."

…

Christian's eyes kept darting to Sawyer who had been trailing behind them in a casual outfit.

"Are you really uncomfortable with his presence?" She linked her arm in the crook of his as they navigated their way through the crowds, no one paid them any attention as their eyes were all focused on the sales.

He didn't say anything but his eyes were still darting from one designer brand to another without showing any interest.

"You know this could be you in the future, with all the power in the world and your own team of experts to protect you because you're just that important."

"Don't give me false hope, Anastasia," he chastised her lightly. "My hands are tied."

"Why, because you don't have the money to start again? Have you been looking into starting over?"

He nodded, he had been doing everything he could to cover all the bases pretending he had enough budget. The failure had hit him hard and he wasn't nearly as confident in his own ability as he was before, and he didn't want to try anything until he was a hundred percent sure that it would succeed.

However, there was a certain number of risks that he would just have to take if he wanted to make more money than other average businesspeople.

"It's not just about the money."

"Then what? Is it something that I can help with?"

"I doubt it."

"Well, you can still tell me."

"Elena gave me a deadline to pay her back."

"Didn't you already do that?"

"I paid her exactly a hundred grand but she wanted interest citing inflation as the reason behind this demand."

Anastasia huffed and rolled her eyes. It was one year, inflation my ass.

"What happens if you don't pay her back?"

"She leaks the photos so that I'd have no chance of ever starting my company, and I'd drag my family through the mud. She can literally fabricate any story with the pictures."

"Why don't you enlist your family to help you then?"

"Are you insane, Ana?" He glared at her. "I can't let my family know. I'm already a disgrace for dropping out and squandering away all the money now that I'm in debt, there's no way I'm telling them that I've been having an affair with a married woman for the better part of my teenage years."

"Easier said than done, I know, but if you bit the bullet and came clean to your family, there is a chance that they'd support you."

"If I told them what happened, then they'd just disown me officially."

"I'm sure that's not going to happen. I mean, your brother let you stay at his place asking for nothing in return even when you're penniless."

She was trying to coax him into thinking about confessing because the one time that she had met with his family told her that he was loved, he just didn't know that he made a mistake but it wasn't one that was unforgivable. Besides, it wasn't even his fault that he got involved with an older lady because she seduced him, but she wasn't going to tell him that knowing he would never accept that notion.

"Do you still want to start your own company?"

He nodded, his head hanging in defeat even though that was still a dream of his.

"If there's no Elena and you have an investor, is there anything else that's holding you back?

"No."

"Can we make a pact then?" She stopped, in the crowded mall, halting all the traffic and earning every glare from passerby as they bumped into Sawyer so they wouldn't reach her as they walked around the couple.

"I don't know."

"I will be your investor under the following conditions. Go to your parents and come clean to them about Elena before her deadline, and tell them that she has compromising photos of you that she's holding for ransom. If it works out," which I'm sure it will, she added in her mind confident that his parents would be supportive no matter what kind of sexual lifestyle he was into; that was a personal preference after all. "Then you'll have all the backup that you'll ever need to wipe Elena out."

"If it doesn't? What if they kick me out completely?"

"Then I'll pay the ransom money for you, and you'd still get your startup capital."

"Ana, no, don't do that."

"If it's money you're worried about, Christian, then you can forget it. I make millions every year since half a decade ago, I can spare a quarter of it for a good investment."

"You don't know what you're doing, Anastasia."

"Maybe not, but I'm young and reckless, and I have all the money in the world with no one to share it with. I'm not majoring in Accounting Finance and Economics to hoard my cash."

"Let me think about this, Ana. I can't ever ask you to do this. It's too much, I can't accept it."

"Sleep on it, then," she acquiesced. "Just so you know, you were fifteen, and fifteen year-olds are dumb."

"The age of consent in Washington state is sixteen."

"A year isn't going to make them any wiser, smarter or brighter, Christian."

She grazed her nail around his chin and scratched over his stubbles lightly, letting out a small giggle as she watched his face morph into different expressions and finally settled on confusion.

"Come meet my little brother tomorrow, and you'll see just how young and stupid they actually are. It's really eye-opening," she added teasingly as she recalled her brother's boneheaded antics.

He nodded numbly, momentarily paralyzed under her touch.

"Let's go buy you a Christmas gift before Luke throttles me."

…

New Year's Eve got here before he could wrap his mind around the events in the past few days that he spent with Anastasia. He felt like he hadn't even decided if he was going to confess to his parents or not, but tonight was his last chance.

They were welcomed by a young boy skating down the slope of their driveway when Anastasia pulled the car into park.

"You're going to run over him," Christian snapped at her.

"Relax, he's my brother."

He said nothing and really studied the little boy that was only five years younger than him, yet he seemed so carefree and… unattached to anything. He barely paid attention to the car as he skated past it.

"Luke's here, Timmy!" Anastasia called, and the boy flipped her the bird without sparing a glance in her way, but when Sawyer got out of the driver's seat, the boy charged toward him, promptly abandoning his skateboard as it rolled down hill and into a bush.

"Who's that?" He pointed at Christian who had just got out on the other side, and before Anastasia or Sawyer could get a word in, the boy sprinted back to the house. "Mom, Dad, Annie brought a boyfriend home!"

"In your dreams," Anastasia hissed at his brother, ruffling his hair in the process as she stuck a leg out in front of him purposely tripping him over, and catching him at the very last minute, softening his fall to the ground. "Go get your skateboard."

"Introduce me to your boyfriend first," he puffed out his chest with his hands on his waist. He was trying to look buff but no matter how much muscle he packed Anastasia would always find him ridiculously adorable.

"I will when I get one," she patted his head with a giggle before making her way deeper into the house.

"Timothy Steele," he held out a hand waiting for a man hug but all he got was an utterly amused Christian taking his hand for a shake.

"Christian Grey," he mimicked, and Anastasia couldn't help but giggle to herself as she watched her brother looking at the man like a deer caught in headlights.

"Go get your skateboard, fat ass," she chucked a ball of tissue paper at her brother's head to shoo him away before he forced a hug on Christian, freaking him out with foreign touches.

"How old is he?"

"Just turned fifteen two months ago."

"Christian and Ana sitting on a tree… F-U-C-K-I-N-G!" With rhythmic beat, he stomped back into the house obnoxiously loud with his skateboard in hand, completely disregarding the fact that they had a guest.

Anastasia pinched the bridge of her nose when she realized that he showed up not a minute after he left.

"Luke brought it over for you again, didn't he?"

"You know it! He's my man!" He brought his fist to his pectoral and then produced a peace sign when he extended his arm pointing at his sister before looking down at his phone.

"Where's Mom and Dad?"

Timothy shrugged without even glancing up from his phone as he walked toward the double doors leading him into the kitchen, no doubt looking for a snack.

"Don't know, don't care."

Christian watched as he neared the door, and wondered if he should warn him that he was about to walk into a pillar but decided against it so he would sound cool.

"Ow! Fuck!"

Christian covered his mouth with his fist stifling his laugh as he watched the teenager's head bounce off of the wooden frame. He then watched the kid kick the door frame as if it would make his head hurt less. He finally lost it when he saw the boy limp into the kitchen mumbling every curse words he knew.

Anastasia was right, what do fifteen year olds know? Witnessing her younger brother's behavior was comedic but also sobering. He looked just like he did, except that he had a darker shade of copper than Timothy, and slightly less built than the little dude.

"Your brother's funny," he chuckled humorlessly, trying to take the edge off of his nervousness as he sat in his parents' driveway.

He had been sitting there for almost half an hour attempting to muster up enough courage to head in there only to deliver the worst news on the last day of the year.

Anastasia sat by him, patiently waiting for him to gather all his wits and energy.

"What's your favorite song?" He asked out of the blue, and she stared at him for a beat before answering him, deciding to let him utilize every method known to men to distract himself.

"Charlie Puth's My Gospel. That's one of my favorites."

"Why that song?"

"I like it when a guy is fully devoted and dedicated to me, it makes me feel cherished and wanted. If I wouldn't get hounded by the public, then I'd have no trouble publicizing my relationships because I'm proud of it."

She humored him as she observed him carefully, her eyes darting to the digital time on the dashboard thinking of a way to give him a much needed push.

"What does an ideal date look like for you?"

"I'm not the dinner and movie kind of girl, but if I'm really into the guy then I'd do everything and enjoy it."

"Then, what would you prefer?"

"Anything casual that doesn't have a dress code. We can fly to Paris and stand on the top of the Eiffel Tower or we can spend the night in a casino, or stroll the street while we get tacos from the truck. Literally anything as long as it's with the right guy," she shrugged her dainty shoulders and pursed her lips. "So, surprise me," she added in a softer voice as her eyes met his. She didn't know what he was trying to achieve with the line of questioning or if this was just him trying to distract himself.

She secretly wished that he was fishing for information for future references.

"What would be your dream boyfriend?"

She was silent for a beat, not because she was shocked speechless by the question but more because she had no idea how to answer that question. She wanted to say something, anything to keep his mind from stressing out the impending confrontation.

"Appearance wise or personality?"

"Both. Do you have a type?"

She giggled. "If you haven't figured it out, I like male attention, I'm just picky about the kind of men that pay them."

"Describe someone then."

"I wouldn't know until I meet him," she revealed demurely even though she was coming up with phrases after phrases describing the man sitting right next to her. "I only just turned twenty, I'm not in a rush."

"Are you looking then?"

"Not really," she shook her head but the only reason she gave that answer was because she still wasn't over him. "I like my man witty, loyal, and can get their priorities right."

He glanced at her just in time to meet her pointed glare, and he knew that his time was up. He had to stop stalling, whether it was because she didn't like a man who procrastinated or the fact that he really had to get the show on the road, he knew that he just had to get out.

"Okay, let's go. I'm ready."

The moment he said the words, he trembled. He was not ready, he would never be.

A hand slipped into his and shoved the car door out of his hand as it clicked shut a moment later.

"Do you want me to stay with you?"

"Ana," he stood at the hood of the car, he grabbed both of her hands forcing her to face him. "I can't do this."

"What can I do?"

His lips quivered and his teeth chattered, but it wasn't because of the cold. His jaw was shaking uncontrollably and his brain couldn't recall a single word let alone string together a sentence.

"Will it help if I tell you that you're already a quarter of a million richer?"

With all the adrenaline rushing through his veins, this little snippet of information was just a little too much to handle that he felt like he could faint. Taking a deep breath, he nodded numbly and robotically.

"Good," she brought his hands up and pecked the back of each. "You can do this."

…

Anastasia turned on the television in his room finding the channel live streaming the Time Square Ball Drop before turning her attention back to the man pacing the length of his childhood bedroom.

"Are you sure you don't want to join them? They're not mad at you."

"I don't want them to be mad at themselves either! How can they blame themselves for this?"

She lowered her head to stop herself from voicing her opinion, as she wondered why didn't the parents really ponder the drastic change overnight in their son. She could understand that it would be a huge burden lifted off of their shoulders when Christian started to behave, but shouldn't they at least look into the stimulus behind it so they could encourage the behavior with the right stimulation later on.

"Can we watch the fireworks from your rooftop?"

There was no sound from him, not even an acknowledgement of her question.

"Or in your room? Do you know a good spot?"

She was still met with his silence and pacing and hair-pulling.

After a deep breath, she closed her eyes briefly to suppress the raging irritating anger that she knew she should not project on him in a time like this.

"Christian," she tried again.

He stopped in front of his window and took a seat on the balcony.

"I don't want to talk about it, Anastasia."

She nodded, and she completely understood that he might need some time to process the information from tonight because to him it was unbelievable that they embraced him instead of calling him filthy and throwing him out. Her eyes returned to the TV screen and she briefly wondered if Luke had taken her advice and took the gift card or if Hannah was actually happy to see him showing up unannounced.

Her eyes glued to the digital screen, and watched the people inside dance to the music playing at the Time Square. All eyes focused on the ball lit up by its LED lights. In the past, she could feel the energy from the screen when she turned the volume up with her parents if they weren't in NYC, and they would dance in their living room, however this year, she couldn't even feel the joy let alone hear the cheers.

"Christian, the countdown is starting…" She tried one last time.

"Five!"

"Four!"

"Three!"

When he still wouldn't budge, she leapt out of the bed and in two swift strides, she was standing in between his slightly parted legs.

"Two!"

Her hands cupped his face, forcing him to lift his head up to look at her.

"One!"

Before he could protest, she pressed her lips to his and her hands slipped into his hair as she pulled his head down and closer to hers.

There was no way that she'd ring in the New Year without kissing her favorite man.

"Happy New Year from the Big Apple," she whispered to him. Her lips hovering over his and his forehead resting against hers.

He couldn't remember how the rest of the night went, her existence was only reaffirmed when he saw a Christmas card laying on his nightstand next to his phone the next morning when he woke up in an empty bed.

It was a picture of her in a high neck wide leg jumpsuit, showing off her petite figure as she laid on her side, her upper body propped up by an elbow with the other hand holding the stem of a single white tulip covering half of her red lips.

Turning the card over, in addition to his address and her signature, it read

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year from the Empire State x

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Same time, same place, see you tomorrow.

X

Saph T