Chapter 5: A Change of Plan

"Stop laughing at my brother," Edyth scolds, smacking Thorin's nephews in the arm as she passes them. "You've all given him an overwhelming night."

Fili chuckles, leaning back against the wall with another tankard in his hands. "Sorry lass," he grins. Kili grins at his brother, leaning next to him then changes his mirthful expression to Edyth.

"It was pretty funny though," he snickered. The pair hold their laughter, waiting for Edyth to break her glare. Their faces eventually do and Edyth shakes her head in disapproval of her own growing smile.

"It wasn't," she denies but she barely convinces herself. The brothers snicker. "Stop it. You're making me feel awful." Huffing, she places the newly washed bowl on the stack with the rest of the utensils. "Alright, it was utterly hilarious. I've never seen him so pale."

Her brother has taken refugee on a large chair, a cup of tea that Dori made in his hand. Gandalf was speaking with him, attempting to convince him to sign the contract. Edyth is conflicted. These Dwarves want help. They need help and her brother has the power to offer it. But the idea of her brother joining on a dangerous quest across to the other side of Middle Earth without her is terrifying.

Edyth sighs, leaning against the doorway as Bilbo refuses Gandalf. "Sorry, Gandalf, I can't sign this. You've got the wrong Hobbit." He rises to his feet, discarding he empty teacup. Edyth sighs again as he saunters past her silently, trailing up the stairs towards his bedroom.

Edyth waits a few minutes, thinking very carefully over her current decision. Releasing her tightly squeezed eyes, she marches forward to Gandalf. "You asked the wrong Hobbit," she declares, capturing the attention of not only Gandalf but Balin and Thorin as well. "Bilbo may refuse but I can also do this."

Gandalf shifts his feet, shaking his head with squinted eyes. "No, my dear. You are not even of age."

"I'm thirty-four, old man," she quips. Thorin and Balin come to their side, intrigued by the conversation. Gandalf peers sceptically down at her before shifting his eyes to his hands, doing the calculation on his fingers. As he counts, she shifts her attention to the two Dwarves. "I can sign the contract."

Balin smiles sympathetically, lying a hand on her arm. "Lass, this is no light journey. I do not think Bilbo would have faired well, let alone a Hobbit lass."

"I know that," she breathes. "But you need a Hobbit. And I'm here right now offering that to you."

"Bilbo will come around," Gandalf counters. "He just needs to find his sense of adventure again. He's a Took, it's in his blood."

Edyth places her hands firmly on her hips, flaring her nose. "He lost that urge long ago," she proclaims. "I have not. I am of the same blood, yet you do not offer me the same opportunity."

"And why," Thorin speaks up for the first time, "do you want to help us."

"Because I want to help," she answers within an instant. "If I'm being frank, which I think this night calls for, I'm not particularly fond of you Oakenshield. But what I do know is that you lost your home, you lost your throne, and most importantly, you lost a part of yourself in Erebor." She raises one brow, cocking out her leg. "Besides, you wouldn't be responsible for my fate, just as you wouldn't have been for Bilbo's."

Thorin holds his arms crossed over his chest. They stare at each other, willing the other to break. She holds it firm, not having any desire to back down but she cannot deny that his eyes are beady and hard to hold. Finally, Thorin glances to Gandalf for his opinion.

Gandalf shrugs slightly, leaning against his staff. "She seems quite adamant," he admits. "I did not consider her before because I thought she was not of age, but time seems to have escaped me."

Edyth smiles in victory as Thorin's eyes travel back to hers. "I'm not exactly fond of you either Miss Baggins," he growls. "I'm already predicting your tendency to annoy me. The same conditions apply to you as they would have for the other Hobbit." He grits his teeth, changing his dark glare to Balin. "I cannot believe I am allowing a woman on this quest," he snarls before stalking off to another room.

Balin holds a small and sad smile still, nodding to Edyth. "I'll bring over the contract." Edyth mouths her thanks feeling Gandalf's eyes on the side of her head. Once Balin leaves, she braves herself to face them.

"I can do this Gandalf," she whispers. "You know I can."

"It is not what you can do that tickles my fear, but what this can do to you," he confesses. "You will not be the same when you return, if you return at all."

"Would it be worth it if I didn't? You used to tell us children stories of Middle Earth and now the chance has been laid before me on a silver platter and you expect me to say no? I have not grown into a refined mature Hobbit as my brother has. He took the place of my guardian after our father died and allowed me to remain as I always have been." She licks her lips, pouting and sending her pleading eyes to Gandalf. Though Thorin has given his blessing, it is Gandalf who she respects. "I am going to sign that contract."

On cue, Balin returns with the contract which is once more folded along with a quill already dipped in ink. Edyth takes them both, staring at Gandalf as she lowers the quill to the paper. Gandalf sighs. "Oh alright."

Closing the rest of the gap, Edyth places the paper on her raised thigh, pulling it taut and finds the line for her signature. The ink touches the parchments, bleeding slightly as she runs it over, curving her letters. It is slightly wonky from the angle but nevertheless, on the line.

It is done. She has signed it.

"Oh my," she gasps. "I need to tell Bilbo."

He certainly isn't going to take this lightly. Balin opens his eyes wide. "I wish you luck there, lass. I don't know much about Hobbits, but women are precious to Dwarves and frankly, I'm quite surprised that Thorin agreed to your company."

"Probably because I'm no Dwarf woman," she reasons. "I'm not your kin so he has no need to worry. We have agreed that he is not responsible for me or my fate. Nobody in this company will be."

Balin tightens his lips, placing his fisted hands in his hips. "Responsibility is not limited to words on paper. Neither is a sense of duty."

"I'm not entirely sure I understand what your implying," Edyth drawls. Holding her lips between her teeth, she sends a fleeting glance towards the stairs. "I need to talk to him."

Balin does not say anything more so she takes his silence as a confirmation of her excusal. Slowly, and quite reluctantly, she makes her way to the stairs. Her hand rests on the railing, fingers slowly drifting over the polished wood as her feet slowly tap on each step.

As Edyth reaches the top, she finds Bilbo's bedroom door already open. Bilbo himself is sitting on the edge of his bed, hunched over with a troubled expression. "Bilbo?" she calls from the doorway. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, yes. I'm fine," he replies in a tone that suggests otherwise. "I just want to…sleep this day away."

"It's been an adventure of its own," she agrees softly, joining him on his bedside. "But… Maybe helping them wouldn't be such a terrible thing." She screws her lips around, trying to think of the correct wording. "What if we did help them? We would be the talk of the town for a century," she adds with a chuckle to lighten to room.

"Which is exactly what I don't want," Bilbo protests to her dismay. "And there's no 'we' in this. They asked me and I am politely declining." Bilbo pushes off the side of the bed, walking to the door but turns to face her. "Tomorrow morning we are going to the markets, borrowing Wilkin Torrens cart because spirits know we are going to need it with how much we need to replace. And then we are both going to go about the rest of our lives knowing that I made the right decision."

"They lost their home, Bilbo. Centuries of history, culture. Their people are buried there in tombs. What if someone took the Shire away from us? Bag End? And someone had the ability to help us, but they chose not to. Thorin doesn't strike me as the type to come to another race for help if he knew he wasn't desperate. Dwarves are prideful and the fact that there are thirteen in our house right now with the hope that a Hobbit can help them… does it not tug at your heart as it does mine?"

She is pleading by now, also joining her brother in a stand. Her nose stings, being followed by water filling the bottoms of her eyes but she hastily pushes them back down. Bilbo also has red rimming his waterline, but he shakes his head.

"I can't do it," he mumbles, barely audible. Edyth knows then that there is no way she would be able to tell him through words. "We belong here, Edyth. In the Shire. We're Baggins of Bag End. We are well off and respected. I-I can't risk losing that for either of us. If I left than people would start rumours and you would have to face them. And what if I don't return?"

"What if I left?" Edyth hints. "I could help them as well."

Bilbo quickly shakes his head in a short motion, tossing his loose brown curls over his face. "No. Absolutely not. No. And don't you even think about entertaining that idea." He chokes out a sarcastic laugh. "Could you imagine yourself travelling Middle Earth with a band of Dwarves? You'd march home within a week."

Edyth licks her teeth behind her lips, choosing to ignore that remark. Instead of speaking, she takes two steps to close the gap between them and winds her arms tightly around his waist. Eyes clenched shut, she digs her forehead into his shoulder, relishing what may be their last embrace for a long time, if not ever. It takes all she has left from that day not to speak and admit what she plans. Edyth doesn't think she could refuse him if he pleaded with her to stay. It appears Bilbo felt just in need of the support as he holds her tightly back.

Finally, she pulls back, sniffing but holding herself together. "I'm going to make sure they all find somewhere decent to sleep that's not on my bed," she manages through a mirthful smile.

Bilbo nods. "Remember there are some spare blankets in the downstairs cupboard if they need them."

Edyth smirks tiredly, punching his shoulder with extreme softness. "Look at you. You're already fond of them."

"Barely," he scoffs. "I just won't have them babbling on about our lack of hospitality on their way out tomorrow."

"Don't worry. I'll see to it."

Edyth walks to the door as Bilbo makes his way back to the bed, completely unaware of her goodbye. She doesn't take her eyes off him until the door clicks close, like a knife to the string attaching them both. Now alone, the water floods back to her eyes as she falls against the wall of the hallway. Desperate not to be heard, she cups her mouth, willing her chest to stop convulsing.

Taking a long draw of air, she pushes off the wall, wiping her eyes with the sleeve of her undershirt and goes back down the stairs. The entire ground floor is dim, much unlike it had been before Thorin's arrival. A few Dwarves are strewn about, mostly still with drinks, talking with their friends or family. Edyth silently brushes past most of them until she reaches a room with Thorin, Dwalin, Kili and Bofur. The younger two are joined in conversation, leaving Edyth to only need to interrupt Dwalin from Thorin.

Dwalin scowls as she wanders closer. His eyes first watch her then move to Thorin. "If we weren't certain of failure before, we certainly are now," he growls. Thorin doesn't answer his remark, instead, focusing on Edyth's approach.

"What did your brother have to say?" he questions.

She knows she has to tread lightly. If she is deducing right, the men in Dwarvish families are the head, and their decision goes. Though in the ways of the Hobbits there is also that sense, it is not an ingrained belief, but more of a fall of duty that naturally is bestowed. If she tells them of Bilbo's restraint for her departure, it will give them all the more reason to refuse her.

"He's sorry that he cannot do it" – Dwalin scoffs at this –"but I'm ready." There is technically no lie in her words. Thorin tightens his lips, clasping his hands at his front.

"Very well," he drawls in the same tone he has had for most of the night. "We'll see to it that you have the proper supplies in the morn. Otherwise, get a night of good sleep, it'll be the last one in a proper bed that you'll have for a long time."

The pair leave, not without Dwalin managing to scowl at her one last time. She has a feeling that it will not be different for a long time between them, if it ever changes. Edyth bites the inside of her cheek, twisting the skin on her wrist as she thinks everything over once more but two shadows loom over her, breaking those thoughts.

"I hear ya' coming with us, lass," Bofur smiles. "Won't lie. I'm looking forward to the female company."

Edyth tips her head to the side. "I'm not sure whether I should be happy to hear that or not," she muses but smiles, nevertheless. Bofur has the air around him that she loves very much already. She can tell he will be the light-hearted one of the group, much the opposite to Dawlin and Thorin.

"Are you sure you're up for it?" the other Dwarf asks. Edyth turns her head the other way to Kili who is watching her intently. "You won't have the comforts of home."

Edyth smiles to the ground. "If both your uncle and Dwalin could not convince me otherwise, I doubt you can."

Kili laughs softly. "I'm not trying to convince you not to," he counters. "I just want to make sure you know what you're getting into." He lays a heavy arm around her shoulder, guiding her forward to her living room where she can see the outline of the rest of the Dwarves, soft orange glows lighting their fronts. His presence is heavy – as odd as it is to describe it that way. It just feels like he is very much there and she would be blind to miss it.

"I don't think any of us really know," she murmurs through the quietness of the smial. "I just hope that I won't remain the outcast for the entire thing."

"Outcast?" Bofur repeats. "Nah, lass. Not with me at least."

"You can ride with me and Fee," Kili grins tauntingly.

"Ride?"

"Yeah, on the ponies."

Edyth begins to regret her decision.