A/N: Heeey… still alive :3
Urgh. Gonna try to keep this short. I've had an immensely rough couple of months. Lots of life changes, issues, depression, hormones like crazy… I'm sorry I haven't felt up to responding to the wonderful reviews I've gotten. (Seriously, some days it was enough to lift me out of my depression. I can't thank you all enough for the love you've shown me)
Unfortunately, my partners and I have also dropped out of the One Piece Reverse Bang, but we'll still be doing our projects for later posting. I also finally got a job (working with Akatsuki Celeste, awwww yisss carpool!) which might actually HELP me focus on my stories again. Hopefully the next chapter will be out much sooner :)
Kurapikababu and Shishiswordsman are ridiculously awesome and I adore them. Have you seen the art they've done for my stories? I am cry. (I will get them back someday.)
Dedicated as always to Beyond Kailani (who wrecks my heart with her stories), and a huge thank you to my beautiful "I know it's like 11 pm and we have to be up at 7 am" backup beta, Akatsuki Celeste.
Bonds of Sea and Fire
Chapter 24: Skeletons In Our Closets Pt. 1
"Go ahead and go," Bay's voice was soft and understanding. Perhaps softer than anyone had heard in a very long time. "They're all outside anyway."
Lami tore her gaze from her arm, blinking up at Bay for a moment before she turned to the door. The rim of a straw hat could be seen in the doorway, and after having observed the brothers together, she highly doubted he was there without at least Ace or Sabo.
"It's amazing they've kept quiet as long as they have, honestly," Bay chuckled. "Just remember what I said about taking it easy."
"I will," Lami promised, pulling the short sleeve down over the bandages on her upper arm. "Thank you for being so patient with me, Bay."
"Hey, you're like the perfect patient," Bay acknowledged. "Besides. I'm a good doctor, remember? I can tell most of the signs of a panic or anxiety attack. You don't need to be rocking back and forth and hyperventilating for me to notice."
Lami ducked her head. "A lot of people get that one wrong. I didn't think you would, but sometimes…"
"Sometimes people just don't believe it or take the word of the person having the attack. I get it," Bay finished for her. "Run along, Lami."
A soft smile touched Lami's lips and she hopped down off the bed, landing nimbly on her feet. "See you at dinner, then. Sit with Haruta and the others - they told me I should and then everyone got suspicious."
"Thanks for the warning," Bay said with a heavy sigh. "Their pranks will be the death of me."
"Pranks?" Lami inquired. When Bay simply shook her head, Lami grinned again. "Well, I'm sure I'll figure it out." She headed out of the room with a quick wave to Chloris and Vere, smiling at the four boys standing in the hall.
"Lami!" Haruta yelped, jumping and nearly tripping over Luffy. "We were just coming to see if you were done!"
Sabo shot him a look, then grinned at Lami. "Half the crew is still on the island so we don't really have anything to do or anywhere to be. Haruta suggested we come show you around."
"That was nice of you," Lami said, looking briefly to Haruta, then Sabo again. "You've mentioned a library. I'd love to finally see it."
"It's pretty impressive," Ace admitted. "Me and Luffy are still learning to read, so we don't spend as much time there as Sabo."
"I don't read very often," Haruta blurted out. "I mean I'm usually training with Vista if I have spare time. I use a sword."
"You're a swordsman?" Lami asked.
"Not yet," Haruta corrected, flustered. "I mean, I'm trying to become one. I'm alright. Just not the best. Yet."
"That makes perfect sense," Lami told him, nodding once. "Just like I'm not a real surgeon yet."
"And I'm not the Pirate King yet," Luffy chimed in. He grabbed Lami's arm to tug her along. "Let's go look at the books!"
Lami hissed in pain, stumbling towards him.
"Luffy, you're hurting her," Ace scolded, though his tone was softened by concern. "Is it your arm?"
Luffy immediately let go, and Lami rubbed her arm with an embarrassed cough.
"Did I hurt you, Lamby?" Luffy asked, peering up at her with wide eyes.
"Just startled," Lami promised. "I had to get a lot of blood work done. And I got shots, too. Try not to tug on my arms, okay?" When Luffy nodded diligently, she turned to Ace, trying not to blush at the fact that every single one of them looked concerned. She wasn't used to having so many people care about her. "You don't need to scold him, Ace. It was a simple mistake and I wasn't badly hurt. But thank you. For worrying, I mean."
"I'm worried too," Haruta mumbled, almost under his breath.
"Okay," Ace offered a hesitant smile again.
"So, library?" Sabo suggested with a touch of impatience now that Lami had confirmed she wasn't hurt.
"Yes," Lami agreed, reaching out to take Luffy's hand.
He paused, staring at their joined hands for a moment before furrowing his brow and looking up at her. "Why are we holding hands?"
Lami froze for a moment, as if realizing what she'd done. She stared at their connected hands, then swallowed. "That's what siblings do, right? I remember I used to hold my big brother's hand all the time."
"I hold my big brother's hand all the time, too!" Luffy agreed. "But I don't have to."
"Yeah, right, which is why you ran off and got lost again," Ace griped.
"And saved Lami's life," Sabo reminded him.
Ace grumbled, but he shrugged and shoved both hands in his pockets. He reconsidered a moment later and hastily snagged Luffy's other hand. Delighted, Luffy began to swing, lifting his feet with a joyful sound.
"Is that alright on your arm? I could take over," Sabo offered.
"It's fine," Lami assured him, doing her best to keep pace. "Somehow, it's nostalgic."
"Does it remind you of something you don't remember?" Sabo asked.
"That doesn't make sense," Haruta said, furrowing his brow as he walked on Lami's other side. "How can you be reminded of something you don't remember? Wouldn't you be remembering it?"
"No, Sabo's right," Lami murmured, smiling. "I can't remember what it reminds me of. But it reminds me of something."
"Oh…" Haruta still seemed a little confused, or perhaps concerned, but if it made sense to them, there was no point questioning it. "Is it a good memory?"
"Yeah," Lami's smile brightened a little. "I think I used to do this with my brother and maybe our mother or father. Maybe when I was Luffy's age."
"Oh, that reminds me - did Bay figure out your age?" Sabo asked, looking over.
"Sort of. She said there's no way I'm younger than twelve, and I'm not fifteen yet. She said if she had to guess my age, she'd go with thirteen," Lami admitted. "I have no idea what age I am."
"Do you know your birthday?" Sabo spoke up again, frowning.
Lami was silent for a few moments before shaking her head. "No."
"Well, regardless, that means you'd be our big sister, and Haruta's little sister," Sabo surmised, looking thoughtful.
"Birthdays aren't usually a huge deal around here," Haruta added. "I mean, with a crew this big it'd be a party every single day. But the Commanders have a party on their birthdays, and there's a party at the beginning of every month for everyone who has a birthday in that month. You should pick a birthday…"
"I figured I'd just keep counting my age at the start of the year," Lami said, looking over at him.
"But that's Ace's birthday," Luffy interrupted, still happily swinging between them.
Ace coughed, glancing away with a shrug. "Other people can have a birthday on that day too, Luffy."
"Well, I wouldn't want to take the day away from him," Lami joked, looking at Luffy. "I'll pick a different one, then let you know."
"Okay," Luffy agreed.
Sabo took over leading, glancing over his shoulder every once in awhile to smile at Luffy. It didn't take long to reach the library. As one of the largest individual spaces on the ship, there were multiple doors leading in - they just happened to use the main entrance. The sight stole Lami's breath, causing her to pause in the doorway while the others kept walking. There were towering walls of multicolored books, shelves making precise rows on the first floor - and a second level overlooking the first, each wall overflowing with books and parchment. There were overstuffed armchairs and couches on the second level, with several small tables and comfortable looking chairs on the first.
The only reason Lami realized she'd stopped walking was the tug on her hand, and when she looked down at Luffy's arm, she realized it was stretched at least six feet from where it should have been.
All four of the boys were looking at her, waiting for her to join them.
"Sorry," she hastily apologized as she darted forward to catch up, looking specifically to Luffy as she said it. "I was a little overwhelmed."
"Don't worry about it," Haruta reassured her. "Sabo reacted the same way when he saw it."
"I didn't expect a pirate ship to have a library like this," Lami admitted, pleased to see that Luffy wasn't upset about his arm being stretched - he simply went back to swinging once she was in range.
"This ship has a little bit of everything," Ace said, rubbing the back of his neck with his free hand. "It's home for a lot of different people."
"I can imagine," Lami murmured, finally letting go of Luffy's hand as he struggled to free himself and take off. She watched with an amused smile as he stretched to grab the railing on the second floor, rocketing himself right into a shelf and knocking several books off.
"Ugh! Luffy!" Ace scolded, dashing up the stairs after him.
"This happens a lot," Haruta apologized as Sabo hurried after Ace. Luffy was in no danger in the library, at least. When he rocketed around the deck, there was always a risk of flying over the side. There was usually a mess in the wake of his enthusiastic form of travel, but nothing bad enough to cause complaints so long as someone cleaned it.
Still, dangerous or not, Sabo often followed to help Ace with the cleanup.
"It's nice," Lami commented, watching for a few moments before turning to Haruta. "How long have you all been brothers?"
"Six or seven months now, I lost track," Haruta said, trying to act nonchalant. "They were brothers for a while before that, though. If you ask, Luffy'll tell you they're his special brothers because they swore an oath over sake cups."
"So Luffy, Ace, and Sabo were brothers before they came to this crew," Lami reiterated. "And now they're everyone's brothers?"
"Sort of," Haruta shoved his hands into his pockets. "Sabo seems like he's all on board to join the crew. Luffy keeps insisting he's gonna be the Pirate King so he can't really join…"
Lami inclined her head to him, waiting for him to continue as he tried to come up with the right words.
"Ace doesn't seem ready," he finally sighed, glancing up at the second floor again. "He was against staying in the beginning. I'm pretty sure he wants to stay now, but I can't be completely sure."
"What makes you uncertain about it? He seems to like it here," Lami followed his gaze, watching as Ace smacked Luffy upside the head and started picking books up off the floor.
"Everyone in the crew calls our captain 'Oyaji'," Haruta explained.
"Is that a rule? Bay didn't mention that one."
"No!" Haruta turned to face her now, laughing after realizing how harshly he'd protested her question. "I mean, no. It's definitely not a rule. It's just… habit? Instinct?" Haruta shrugged. "He sees us all as his sons and daughters. That's why we call each other brothers and sisters, too."
"Bay mentioned that everyone in the crew was one of Whitebeard's children," Lami acknowledged. "But it's not mandatory?"
"I don't think so?" Haruta frowned, puzzled. "I mean, I guess it sort of is. We're a family. I've never met anyone who joined the crew and didn't want Whitebeard to be their father."
"Then why can't you be sure about Ace?" Lami questioned. "He looks happy to me. And he's still young, so wouldn't he want to have a father?"
"Actually, I don't think he likes the idea of a father," Haruta answered with a troubled look. "Sabo said it's complicated and I didn't push the issue. But the main reason I don't know how Ace feels is because he still hasn't called Oyaji - well, 'Oyaji'. He either avoids addressing him or mumbles 'Whitebeard' and runs off."
Lami regarded the trio again. "Isn't that a good thing?"
"Why would that be a good thing?" Haruta asked. He held his hands up when Lami looked at him. "I'm not being a jerk, I promise! You're definitely smarter than me, so did you see something I didn't?"
Lami's cheeks colored at his statement - whether it was fact or not, it was an honest compliment that filled her with warmth - and she glanced away. "If he didn't want to stay, wouldn't he be more firm in what he called your captain? It sounds to me like he's trying to work up the courage to call him his father. Especially if he doesn't like the idea of parents or if he had a bad experience with his own. I mean, I could be reading into things too much… I developed a fascination for psychology recently and there were plenty of books on the subject."
Haruta couldn't help but stare at her for a moment before his entire face lit up. "You think so? I mean, Ace has seemed happy here, and he has made claims about getting his tattoo when he turns sixteen, but since he can change his mind whenever he wants, I've been trying to be cool about it…"
"Sixteen?" Lami echoed.
"That's the minimum age anyone on the crew can get a tattoo," Haruta explained. "I was the youngest when I joined, so I don't think it was a rule before I came along."
"So the adults don't think a kid can make up their mind about something like joining a pirate crew?"
Haruta frowned again, but he shook his head. "I don't think that's it. I think the way they see it is we're all a lot younger. Maybe we know for sure what we want to do with our lives, maybe not - but Oyaji's mark is something you take when you're sure. Not because it seems convenient, or you want temporary protection, or because you thought you had no choice. It means you're family forever. I know this is my family - my home - but I've wondered if I really belonged here before, too. I mean…" he gestured towards her. "You don't have to join the crew, you know. Bay just wanted to help you. I think she really wants you to stay, though. I mean, so do I-" he cut off with a flustered cough, looking to his feet. "It's not a bad life."
"I see," Lami murmured with another thoughtful glance at him. "Then how come all the nurses seem to have their tattoos in really provocative places?"
Haruta's entire face turned red. "A-ah, you'd have to ask them. You can put it anywhere, you know? I'm thinking my chest or upper arm would be cool."
Lami was silent for a few moments. Then she shrugged. "Well, that makes sense. I guess I should ask them directly before I make any decisions about the kind of people they are. I'm sorry for being so impolite."
"This is you being impolite?" Haruta joked. "Jeez. You don't need to apologize. Anyway, do you wanna go look at the books? The medical section is up on the second floor."
"Yes," Lami answered, smiling again and heading for the stairs. As she headed directly for the shelves with the books that interested her, Haruta made his way over to the trio.
"Does Lamby like the books?" Luffy asked, disheveled with a book resting atop his head like a secondary hat.
"She just started looking at them," Haruta answered, picking the book up off his head and shelving it.
"I know we said we'd show her around, but maybe we should come back for her," Sabo suggested, glancing over at her. Lami already had both arms full of books, and from the look on her face, it was clear she wasn't going to wait to start reading them.
"Might not be a bad idea," Haruta admitted. "What do you two want to do?"
Luffy opened his mouth.
"We're not going to go raid the kitchen," Ace cut him off immediately, shelving the last of the books.
Luffy closed his mouth with a huff.
"We could go bug Marco," Sabo suggested. "I still really want to see his devil fruit form."
"Yeah, okay," Ace agreed. "Maybe we can get him to take all four of us flying?"
"I'll pass, but he'd take you guys for sure," Haruta chuckled.
"You just love that you've seen his devil fruit form and we haven't," Sabo snorted at Ace.
"It was pretty funny watching you guess," Ace admitted. "But it's not like it's a secret."
"If it wasn't a secret, you would have told us," Sabo argued.
"How can Marco fly?" Luffy argued. "Pineapple-men don't fly."
"Pineapple… men…?" Haruta echoed, all three turning to look at him.
Luffy was picking his nose, looking thoroughly unimpressed. "Thatchy said that Marco's a Pineapple-man cause he ate the pine-pine fruit."
Haruta struggled to keep a straight face. "Oh. Thatch said that?"
Ace coughed into his hand, some of his laughter escaping in a choked gasp. "I-I see."
Sabo was the only one who genuinely seemed to have his expression under control as he smiled down at Luffy. "So, you think he turns into a giant pineapple?"
"Yeah," Luffy nodded earnestly, turning to Sabo. "And everyone rides on the fronds while he bounces. That's how he took everyone down the mountain, right?"
Ace burst out laughing, clutching his stomach. "A giant pineapple that bounces around?!"
Luffy's cheeks puffed in annoyance and he put his hands on his hips. "What's so funny?!"
"You don't think the idea of a giant pineapple bouncing around with people riding it is hilarious?!" Ace's laughter only increased at Luffy's indignance. "Just- a giant pineapple with Marco's face on it?!"
Sabo choked, his shoulders shaking as the image came to mind and he found himself struggling to hold his laughter in. "W-we should go tell him this."
"You want to tell him this?" Haruta echoed with a snort.
"It's not gonna be our fault," Sabo reminded him with a sly grin. "Remember, Thatch is the one who told Luffy."
"Oh, you're right," Haruta realized. "I'm in."
"C'mon," Ace laughed, grabbing Luffy's arm and hauling him up onto his back in one fluid motion. The indignance completely vanished as Luffy wrapped his limbs around Ace's upper body and happily settled in. "Let's go find Marco."
Lami noticed their departure, but just as predicted, she'd already settled in with stacks of books and showed no signs of being ready to leave. A simple wave indicated she'd be fine on her own or just hang out until they came back to find her.
"What do you guys think of Lami?" Haruta blurted out once they were in the hall.
"She seems nice," Sabo answered, cocking his head to the side.
"Lamby is nice," Luffy said. "She gave me her food!"
"Do you think she'll stay?" Haruta asked, fidgeting. "She seems like she'll stay, right?"
"Probably?" Ace shrugged. "Why do you ask?"
"No reason," Haruta shrugged it off with a nervous laugh. "It's just… nice, you know? Having more people around my age. Like you guys…"
"I already said we were staying," Ace reminded him, raising an eyebrow.
"Yeah, I know," Haruta's nervousness faded and he gave a genuine smile at Ace. "Still set on getting a tattoo on your chest?"
"I think it'd probably be the best place to show it off," Ace agreed with a nod.
"I still think it'd show up more on your face," Luffy chimed in with an impish grin. "Curry has his on his face!"
"Curiel told me not to do that," Ace said with a snort. "And I'm not getting a tattoo on my face!"
"I'll just get mine wherever Ace gets his. I can't make up my mind," Sabo chimed in. "So I'm in agreement - don't get it on your face."
Ace rolled his eyes, tuning out Luffy's chatter as his rubbery passenger started going on about the benefits of facial tattoos and how everyone would be able to see them. When they reached the deck, he set Luffy down and grinned, seeing Marco at the chair Whitebeard always lounged in. Of course, Luffy had no problems rocketing right over and crashing their conversation while his brothers made a slower approach
Whitebeard's booming laugh echoed as he easily caught Luffy in one hand, setting him down on the armrest. "Eager to leave the ship again?"
"Not really!" Luffy chirped, bouncing on his heels and tugging his hat down a little more securely. "But Lamby's busy with all the library books and I wanna ride the giant pineapple."
"The… giant pineapple, yoi?" Marco echoed, raising an eyebrow.
"Yeah! We were talkin' about your abilities," Luffy explained. "And we wanna take a ride! Ace said if we asked, you might take us flying. I've never seen a flying pineapple, but it's gotta be awesome!"
Marco twitched. "Did Ace say I transformed into a giant pineapple?"
"No, Thatchy did," Luffy supplied, tilting his head to the side. "You okay, Ossan?"
Whitebeard snorted into his hand, clearly struggling to keep him from laughing in Marco's face. He intended to laugh after Marco had gone. It was only polite, after all. "Just fine, Luffy," he answered, clearing his throat.
It was at that moment that the others caught up. "I didn't tell him you were a pineapple!" Ace burst out.
Sabo clasped both hands behind his head, grinning cheekily up them. "I guess it's time we saw your Zoan ability, Marco. To clear up this misunderstanding, of course."
"Yeah, you should take them flying," Haruta added. "Show Luffy where to hold on if he can't find the fronds."
"I can find the fronds," Luffy argued.
Marco exhaled, shaking his head, but it was Whitebeard who spoke. "You won't be joining them, Haruta?"
"Nah," Haruta shoved his hands in his pockets. "We were showing Lami around but she got distracted in the library. I figure she'll still need to be shown around once she's done, and I don't want to be gone when that happens."
Whitebeard nodded, regarding Haruta with a curious look before inclining his head towards Marco. "Well, then. I suppose you wouldn't want to keep them waiting…"
"I could have stayed on the island," Marco muttered under his breath. "Pretending to get drunk and not having to convince anyone I don't turn into a pineapple." He plucked Luffy out of Whitebeard's hand and hopped down off the armrest. "Come on. I'll show you why they call me 'Marco the Phoenix', and not 'Marco the Pineapple', yoi."
...
"I can't believe you knew all this time and you've been keeping it to yourself."
"Are you still complaining?" Ace gave a cocky grin over his shoulder, bumping slightly into Luffy's arm. "I already said I was sorry."
"Yeah, and no one bought it," Sabo retorted.
"Why would anyone buy a 'sorry'?" Luffy asked, pushing his face up against Ace's so that their cheeks were pressing together.
"He means no one believed me," Ace snorted. "Oi, Luffy! That's too close!" Despite his protest, he didn't really seem to mind it.
He'd been in high spirits ever since Marco had taken them flying, and once Luffy had gotten past his severe disappointment at the lack of of pineapple-powers, he'd seemed to have the time of his life as well. Of course, it had taken the constant vigil of both brothers to keep him from jumping right off the phoenix, but that hadn't diminished their enjoyment in the slightest. Marco hadn't gone for any fancy maneuvers, of course - the kind Ace always goaded him into when they went flying together - but the sky had started to darken and he must have circled the area at least two dozen times before they'd landed. Most of the pirates were back, some carrying crates full of liquor, and soon it would be time to gather in the galley for dinner.
Luffy had initially wanted to go straight to the galley, but he'd changed his mind the moment they'd realized Haruta and Lami hadn't come to greet them, and asked if they could go to the library instead. Neither brother had questioned it - if Luffy was choosing to track people down instead of go right to the food, then it was clearly important to him.
They found Haruta standing outside the doors to the library, hands tucked behind his head as he leaned against the wall with his eyes closed.
"What's wrong with Haruta?" Luffy asked.
Haruta's eyes snapped open and he pushed away from the wall with a yelp, stumbling. "Oh! Hey! You guys are back!" He smiled at them, but his embarrassment was obvious enough that even Luffy seemed to notice.
"Is Lami still in the library?" Sabo asked with an impish grin.
"Yeah," Haruta answered quickly, fidgeting. "I didn't want to bother her but she's been in there a while, yeah?"
"Yeah, we were gone for hours," Ace raised his eyebrow at Haruta, letting Luffy down.
"Maybe she's lost," Luffy decided, darting right past Haruta and into the library before anyone could stop him. The crash of what they could only assume to be Luffy's rocket colliding with a table and several books echoed through the library and into the hall.
With a groan, Ace hurried after him, Sabo and Haruta on his heels. Lami and Luffy were still crawling out from under the pile of books when they reached the second floor, the table overturned and adding extra weight to hinder their escape.
Haruta and Sabo grabbed the table to move it off of them - it was actually heavier than it looked, as all the furniture was to keep it from sliding around too much during a storm - while Ace grabbed Luffy and yanked him out of the pile with a sigh.
"Are you okay, Lami?" Haruta asked as she dusted herself off, coughing.
"Yeah," Lami answered, a little breathless as she pushed her hair off her face and blushed bright red. "That was an odd way to wake up."
"You were asleep?" Sabo picked up one of the books that had landed near the railing.
"I must have dozed off," Lami murmured, ducking her head. "Is it dinnertime?"
"You're not hurt, are you?" Haruta blurted out, stepping closer. "Your hand's shaking."
Lami quickly shoved both hands in her pockets. "It's probably my blood sugar. I wasn't eating very well on the island."
"Oh…" Haruta looked relieved. "Well, it is time to eat."
"We'll clean up the mess," Ace offered with a sigh. "Since Luffy made it."
"It was like this when I got here," Luffy decided, looking away with a half-hearted whistle.
Ace rolled his eyes and looked at Sabo, only to pause. Sabo was watching Lami with an unreadable look on his face, almost like something had passed between them that no one else had noticed. Before Ace could call attention to it, Sabo turned and flashed a bright grin. "Why don't we all clean up?" he suggested. "We'll stack the books so Lami can pick up where she left off later."
"That's a good idea," Lami quickly agreed, bending down to start picking up books.
For a moment, Haruta hesitated, looking like he wanted to protest, but he eventually changed his mind and knelt to start picking up books. Even Luffy helped without complaint, until the table had been righted and the massive stacks of books had been neatly organized.
"Now can we go and eat?" Luffy whined when the last book falling into place hadn't spurred them into marching to the galley or magically summoned food to the table.
"We would have been out of here faster if you'd been more careful with your rocket," Ace scolded, smacking him lightly upside the head.
"But we can get out of here now," Luffy complained.
"I'm famished," Lami cut in before Ace could retort, offering a neutral smile to both of them. "I don't remember the way, though. Luffy, can you show me?" When she held her hand out, Luffy snatched it and immediately started off.
Lami easily kept pace with him. While none of the others believed she'd honestly forgotten the way, a simple white lie to keep Luffy focused on a task wasn't hurting anyone, and it did stop him from complaining.
Dinner was relatively uneventful, at least by the Whitebeard Pirate standards. While most of the crew appeared to be drunk, the volume and antics really weren't that different from any other night. Lami seemed to take it all in stride, observing everything from the drunken pirate sing-alongs to the prank that caused neon green gelatin to coat half the room. Even after they tried - and failed - to clean the gelatin off, the meal resumed as if they'd barely noticed the prank.
Just as dinner seemed to be winding down and multiple pirates were stumbling to their quarters to sleep it off, Thatch came out of the kitchens. At first, people were wary of a second prank, but they relaxed once they realized the large object he was carrying happened to be a cake on a giant silver platter. He took the cake to the table the younger group had converged on, setting it down and beaming.
"I thought I'd do something special for dessert, to celebrate Lami coming aboard," he explained. "It's a special kind of cake made with alcohol - but we're going to burn the alcohol off."
Luffy, who had started to lean forward to bite the side of the cake, paused. "You have to burn the cake?"
"Yep," Thatch grinned down at him, then looked to Ace. "I thought it might be more exciting if you lit it for me."
It was brief, a mere flicker in Sabo's eyes, but it was enough to draw Lami's attention to him just moments before Ace ignited the cake. The rush of fire was meant to be a spectacle, a showy presentation for the cake itself. There were claps, a few 'ooh's and 'ahh's, and even a shout of delight from Luffy that brought a look of pride to Ace's face.
Even Sabo clapped, shooting Ace an approving look as if he were the one behind the cake's creation and not Thatch - but Lami had seen his fear. The way his eyes darted back to hers for another brief moment gave them both away. She couldn't pretend she hadn't seen it, and he couldn't pretend it hadn't happened.
Neither of them spoke of it, though. Thatch started slicing the cake, Ace barely held Luffy back from jumping right into it, and the happy atmosphere settled around the group like a blanket.
Without bothering to try it - and a promise that it was only because she'd eaten so many rich foods and didn't want to make herself sick - Lami quietly excused herself and slipped away from the table. It wasn't until she made it to the door that she saw Marco's gaze on her, and she realized that perhaps she hadn't been the only one to notice Sabo's reaction.
The only difference was, Marco seemed to understand exactly what it was he'd seen - and Lami was still trying to figure it out.
...
The most comforting part of waking with sleep paralysis was knowing that she couldn't scream or cause enough of a scene for anyone to come check on her. Even with her heart racing and her muscles screaming to move, to break free of her invisible bindings, Lami took comfort in knowing that no one else was aware of her struggle.
There was nothing she could do to break herself out of it, so she settled on trying to ground herself to sensations that took her away from the source of her nightmares. The steady rocking of the ship clashed with the memory of the solid, unmoving rooms in the facility. The snores and murmurs of the medical staff reminded her she was no longer confined to a silent room where her every breath and heartbeat could be monitored through sound, and the mingling scent of alcohol conflicted with the clean, sterile scent from her nightmares.
By the time she was able to lift her arms again, the frantic racing of her heart had calmed to a steady beat, low enough that she wasn't worried about hyperventilating or panicking as she crawled out of bed and located the clothes she'd worn the previous day. She left her hair down, combing her fingers through it briefly and making her way to the door. No one noticed her departure.
It wasn't difficult to find her way to the deck, even with most of the lights out. The salty smell of the sea nearly overwhelmed her as she pushed the last door open and the wind instantly whipped at her hair. Despite the sting and instinctive need to shield herself from the onslaught, the sensation brought a smile to her face. The open sea, the exposure to the elements… it meant freedom.
The first few moments were blind stumbling. It was dark, the ship rocking on the waves, and she'd never wandered around on a moving ship before. Even in the blank, early years of her life, she doubted she'd ever been on a ship. The first had to have been the one she'd stowed away on in her escape from the facility - but unlike the Moby Dick and all the freedom she had to wander as she pleased, she'd spent that journey hidden between cargo boxes, paranoid everyone on the ship would hear her breathing.
"Can't sleep either?"
She jumped, but it was more reflex from being addressed than actually feeling startled. Her eyes flickered to the source, and she was surprised to see none other than Sabo standing at the railing. He looked a little strange without his hat and goggles, but he was smiling, and despite having only known him a short time, his crooked grin was endearing and familiar.
"I suppose not," she answered, making her way to his side and placing a hand on the railing. "Night terrors. You?"
"Sounds about right for me, too," Sabo admitted. "Well, nightmares, anyway - not sure how it's different. I still get them every once in awhile, but not as much as I used to."
"There's not much of a difference, and I have nightmares too. Do you want to talk about it?" Lami wasn't sure what had compelled her to ask, but something about the way Sabo seemed to be shrugging it off had her concerned.
Sabo hesitated. He tucked a bit of hair behind his ear - it was getting long enough that the sides had to be tucked back or they'd annoy him - then shrugged, glancing back out over the open sea. "I guess. What about you? You were having a nightmare when Luffy woke you up in the library, weren't you? Have you ever had anyone to talk to?"
"I guess it's been a while," Lami cracked a small smile and nodded to confirm what he'd already figured out. "I still have them quite often. I used to talk to Dr. Aldo, but I never told him about my nightmares. There wasn't much point… most of them were about the facility, and he worked there."
Sabo frowned. "The facility?"
"The place I was before," Lami clarified. "The reason I'm terrified of the World Government. It was like a hospital, but the doctors were more interested in experiments and test subjects."
A scowl crossed Sabo's face. "Was he really a doctor, then? I mean, if he worked in a place where you had such a bad experience…"
"He made it more bearable," Lami amended. "I can't remember much of anything before the facility. I wasn't even viewed as human there. Dr. Aldo was the only one who treated me differently." She rubbed at the bandage over her left wrist. "To most of them, I was a number. An experiment. He tried to give me a name and see me as a kid, not a test subject. In any case, he's the only reason I'm alive now."
"I didn't mean to speak badly of him," Sabo apologized.
"It's alright. Without context, I'd have thought the same thing." Lami smiled down at him. "So… your nightmares. Are they about fire?"
Sabo tensed, trying to play it off with a cheeky grin that didn't quite meet his eyes. "Come on. My brother is fire."
"When he lit that cake at dinner…" Lami trailed off and his shoulders slumped. He already knew she'd seen it, but a part of him had hoped she wouldn't bring it up. "Your scars look fresh. Like they're not even a year old yet. They're from being burned, aren't they?"
Sabo's hand came up, fingers brushing over the scar surrounding his eye. "It was awhile ago. I thought I'd gotten better at it."
"At what?"
"At not jumping every time I saw fire. Hell, Ace told me he wanted those abilities so all three of us would stop being scared of fire, and most of the time, it doesn't bother me… but sometimes I still jump, or I still flash back to being burned. It's annoying and frustrating." Sabo lowered his hand. "I want it to stop."
"That's perfectly natural, though," Lami said, regarding him with a curious look. "Why don't you tell me about how you got burned. Were you in a burning house? Was it an accident while making a fire to keep warm, or-"
"It was no accident!" Sabo snapped, his voice coming out harsher than intended. When he caught sight of Lami's hesitant expression, he blushed, chagrined. "Sorry. I didn't mean to yell at you."
Lami's eyes filled with understanding, and she smiled. "It's alright. I'm blunt and straightforward about most things, including my own traumas. I didn't mean to sound insensitive, either."
Sabo's shoulders sagged a little, and then he was smiling at her again. "Don't worry about it. I guess I'm still angry… and I'm still ashamed for anyone to know where I come from. It's a little different on the ship where everyone comes from all over the world and it's nothing special, but when I'm talking to just one person, it feels less like my past can fade into the background. If that makes sense."
"It makes perfect sense. Besides, I'm also new to this place, so you might be worried about how I'll view you once I found out, or if I'll react poorly," Lami reasoned, ticking the options off on the fingers of her left hand. "I understand, Sabo. If I thought life could get any worse than what happened to me at the facility, I probably wouldn't be so open about my past, even around pirates."
Sabo nodded to show he understood where she was coming from, then looked to the sky. "I was born noble," he said, and the words still tasted like poison on his tongue. "I ran away from them once and had my first taste of freedom. For five years, I lived in a trash heap outside the kingdom. It's where I met Ace, and later Luffy." He paused for a moment, a smile softening his features. His expression hardened a moment later. "We were only brothers on that island for a short time before my birth parents found out I was still alive. My birth father basically threatened to kill Ace and Luffy if I didn't go back. I had no choice."
"And when you escaped the second time?" Lami prompted, reaching out to put a hand on his shoulder.
"There was a fire," Sabo explained. "A fire all the nobles knew about. It was meant to clean up Goa Kingdom - burn down all the trash they dumped outside the walls, and all the people with it. They were preparing for a visit from a tenryuubito. Do you know about those?"
Lami shuddered. "I've never encountered one, but I've heard rumors - so yes, I know of them."
"Let's hope you never meet one," Sabo muttered, his expression dark. "After the fire, I tried to escape the island. I knew I could never be free if I stayed there. I was going to use the tenryuubito's visit as a distraction to steal a fishing boat. Anywhere in the world would have been better than staying there."
They stood in silence for a moment, riding out a particularly rough patch of waves that had water splashing all the way onto the deck. Lami absently rubbed her arm, wondering if she should suggest they go inside to warm up, but quickly dismissed the thought. It seemed neither one of them wanted to feel confined, and a little cold was a much better alternative.
"I was almost home free when I heard Ace shout my name. He was yelling at me to jump. Didn't think or question it at all - I jumped overboard and barely avoided having my face blown off in the explosion." Sabo met her inquisitive gaze and sighed. "The tenryuubito shot at my ship. Ace pulled me out of the water before I could drown but I'd already gotten burned."
"Do the scars cover your entire left side?" Lami asked. "From the patterns… ah, sorry, I was doing it again."
"It's okay," Sabo reassured her, chuckling. "It's on my shoulder and side, yeah. The upper part of my arm, too."
"So you were nearly killed in an explosion that scarred you less than a year ago, and you're frustrated fire still makes you jumpy?" Lami asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Well, when you say it that way, it sounds kinda dumb," Sabo admitted. "But it's more than that. Ace… he wanted those abilities so we wouldn't be scared," he repeated. "And Luffy isn't anymore. Luffy was never scared of the fire when it came from Ace. I touched the fire because I trusted him, but some of my nightmares…"
"Are they about fire in general, or the explosion?" Lami asked.
"Sometimes it's the explosion… lately, it's been about Ace turning into fire and asking me to trust him," Sabo mumbled, his voice barely audible. "And I refuse."
"Do you see Ace's expression after you refuse in the nightmare?"
"Yeah," Sabo made a bitter sound in the back of his throat. "That's the worst part."
"I think that's completely separate from your fear of fire." Lami braced herself for his incredulity, but to her pleasant surprise, he simply bowed his head.
"I guess I didn't want to admit that, either."
"Is Ace afraid of being rejected?" Lami guessed.
"I don't know if that's the right word. Afraid," Sabo echoed the word, troubled. "It's more like he expects it, and anytime he isn't, he's surprised by it. If he ever thought Luffy or myself might reject him… I can't even imagine what that would do to him."
"Haruta mentioned that he seems hesitant to stay here," Lami recalled. "But it's more that he's afraid of not being allowed to stay here, isn't it?"
"How did you figure that out?" Sabo asked, looking up at her with a suspicious frown.
"I'm fascinated by psychology," Lami said, tugging him away from the railing and towards the upraised areas where they could sit, closer to Whitebeard's giant chair. For a moment, Sabo thought she was changing the subject to avoid having to answer him. "So I make guessed based off my observations and the observations of others." She smiled at his frown. "I'm not going to try and tell you dreaming about butterflies means you have a fear of change or anything like that, but I am going to guess that your nightmares are because you're worried about Ace."
"Do dreams about butterflies really mean a fear of change?" Sabo couldn't help but ask, using playful sarcasm to hide the fact that he was dreading what she might have to say about his real fears.
"I don't know, I made it up," Lami grinned sheepishly at him. "Because of their cocoons, and the chrysalis stage of their lives. Sorry, I guess I have a strange sense of humor because I spend all my time with books instead of people."
"I get the joke," Sabo relented, some of the tension draining as he managed a smile. "I'm the library type too. I love learning - on my terms, anyway. Not when my parents were forcing me to learn what they wanted so I could impress other nobles."
"You're always welcome to keep me company in the library. I have a feeling I'll be in there a lot," Lami joked.
"Sure. It's hard to find time to read these days. I thought Luffy was a handful on land, but on a ship?" He whistled.
"I can't even imagine," Lami teased, pulling her knees to her chest. "And I've only known him for a day."
"That's all it really takes to know him," Sabo teased right back. They lapsed into a comfortable silence after that, with Sabo waiting to see what Lami said next. So far, he found himself intrigued by her insight, and if he was completely honest with himself, it was easier to admit his anxieties to someone closer in age who had no preconceived notions about the kind of person he was.
"I think it's Ace," Lami broke the silence with a thoughtful look. "And it has nothing to do with fire. That's a completely separate issue."
"So, Dr. Lami, why am I having nightmares about Ace, then?" Sabo asked.
Lami cracked a grin at the title, but then her expression turned serious. "Because Ace must be worried about something. You're protective over him, so you're dreading what's going to happen if his worries become realities. You're scared of him losing his trust in you for any reason, which is why you're making yourself panic about the fire. Because, one of the first things you told me when you were frustrated was that your brother is fire."
Sabo looked to his lap, done cracking jokes. Reading books about psychology sounded a lot more important if someone who barely knew him or his brothers was able to pinpoint such an acute, specific fear.
"I wish I knew something I could say to help you, Sabo," Lami sighed when his silence verified her guess as accurate. "You know your brothers better than I do. Do you think anything could ever truly come between you? I don't mean a spat or sibling rivalry - I mean truly come between you and break the bonds you have?"
Sabo didn't even hesitate to shake his head. "Nothing can break our bond. We'll always be brothers."
"Then I think you should talk to him about your anxieties, or if he's up for it, the skeletons in his closet," Lami said, nodding with a sense of finality.
"The skeletons in his closet…?" Sabo echoed, shooting her a quizzical look.
"It's a saying," Lami explained. "You know… like a secret?"
"I don't… why a skeleton? Is this secret supposed to involve covering up a murder?" Sabo blurted out.
The sudden, raucous laughter had both of them jumping, Lami stumbling to her feet and Sabo reaching for a weapon he hadn't brought with him. It took them both a moment to realize they recognized the voice, and that the source was a lot closer than either of them had noticed.
Rakuyo practically fell backwards down the railing towards them, having been on the other side while they sat on the steps. He hung by his knees, cheeks flushed and hair springing wildly around him from the force of gravity. "Have ya never heard that phrase before, lad?"
"So? I've heard it now," Sabo muttered, scowling at having been caught off guard - and worried Rakuyo had heard more than he'd wanted.
"Oh, relax," Rakuyo assured him, waving a hand and sounding a bit tipsy. "I was just checking the safety of the ship. Makin' sure no one drunkenly wandered off the Moby again."
"Again?" Lami echoed, eyebrows raising.
"Anyhow! I didn't hear what you two rascals were whispering about," he teased, and his tone had Lami blushing despite the fact that his implications were completely off base. "I came in at the end of it."
"So you chose to interrupt?" Sabo asked with obvious irritation.
"I came to lighten the mood!" Rakuyo corrected, grasping the rail and swinging himself over it, somehow landing on his feet. "Now then - first off, let me say that we all have skeletons in our closets-"
"Meaning you all have secrets or you've all killed people?" Sabo retorted, rolling his eyes.
"Rude," Rakuyo huffed. "I mean we all come from somewhere, lad. We all have things we don't want to talk about or remember - sometimes they come out at the worst possible time, but it's nothing special. Everyone's runnin' from something. That's how you stay free."
"Is it?" Sabo asked, giving Rakuyo his attention again. "Running is how you stay free?"
"I don't mean literally," Rakuyo corrected, lowering himself to sit at their level. "There are people running from their pasts, their old families, their obligations - some people simply run from the idea of a boring life. The point is, every single member of this crew has something in their past they wouldn't talk about unless someone asked, or it came up in some shocking revelation. Ace has nothing to worry about." He smiled when they both sat down again, even if Sabo still seemed skeptical. "It's like you with your past as a noble, or the lass with her mysterious amnesia and aversion to the World Government."
"Technically speaking, I'm not sure if it's amnesia. I definitely lost my memories, but it doesn't present as typical amnesia, medically speaking," Lami pointed out. She rubbed the back of her neck when they both turned to her. "But he is right, in a sense. Everyone keeps asking me about my past and why I can't remember things, and I answer pretty bluntly… but if no one asked, I doubt I'd be so open with all of this information. And the only reason I'm not guarded about it is because I'm not afraid of pirates selling me out to the World Government."
"Aye, lass," Rakuyo chuckled. "It doesn't matter who you were before you came to us. When you take Oyaji's mark - even if it's just on a shirt or a piece of jewelry because you're too young for the tattoo - you're telling your past if it plans to cause trouble, it better be ready for retaliation from the most powerful crew in the world."
"So if the government found out I was still alive and wanted to kill me…?" Lami inclined her head towards him with a curious look.
"They'd have every single one of us to go through," Rakuyo chuckled. "And some of us could use the exercise." He patted his belly as an afterthought.
"If it helps, you seem to be in peak physical condition," Lami offered, trying to act nonchalant about his claim. The idea of no longer facing her fears alone… it filled her with warmth. "You only feel bloated because of the alcohol, and probably the feast we had for dinner."
"Pfft, feast," Rakuyo laughed. "Thatch and his division are always trying to fatten us up. But thanks, lass. Peak physical condition, eh?"
"What if the thing Ace is running from can't be fought?" Sabo finally asked, his voice low.
"Ah, it's one of those," Rakuyo sighed, slinging his arm around Sabo's shoulders. "We don't fight those kinds of skeletons, lad. We welcome them and make 'em ours."
"I thought I was the optimistic one about all of this… I keep reassuring Ace…" Sabo trailed off with a heavy sigh. "He told Marco, you know."
"Doesn't surprise me. Everyone tends to gravitate towards Marco," Rakuyo agreed. "He was the first, you know. By now, no one really cares what order we got here or how long we've been around, but everyone remembers the first."
"So if Marco knows about this secret and he's okay with it, isn't that reassuring?" Lami questioned.
"Yes and no," Rakuyo answered before Sabo could. "Marco's smart and patient - also one of the most trustworthy members on this ship. He's not the norm, lass."
"So you mean some of the crew might not be as understanding," Lami translated with a slow nod. "I can see that."
"In any case, if it's important, I'm sure we'll hear about it," Rakuyo said, moving his hand to Sabo's hair to ruffle it and ignoring Sabo's indignant swatting. "Hells, some of the crew still hasn't accepted Bay as a Commander simply because she has a pair of tits. Er, boobs. Breasts," he tried to correct himself. Lami and Sabo exchanged glances and shrugged, unfazed by his language, and he sighed. "Just don't tell Kingdew I talked like that in front of you. All I'm saying is, we don't all have to like each other to be a family, and everyone takes time to adjust. Some more than others. Everyone eventually comes around, though."
"I hope so," Sabo murmured. "Because if Ace decides to leave, we all go."
"Everyone knows that already," Rakuyo pointed out. "And trust me, lad. No one wants any of you to go. Unless Ace is secretly some kind of tiny marine spy who plans to assassinate Oyaji… ya know what, no, I'm pretty sure Oyaji'd let a few assassination attempts slide, too."
Sabo cracked a grin at that. It wasn't like Ace had never tried to kill someone who ended up loving him in the end - Luffy was a prime example.
"Now!" Rakuyo slung his other arm around Lami. "We need to lighten the mood and get you rascals back to bed. No more talk of secrets and darkness and bad memories. I say we talk about a more suitable subject - like your brand new life of piracy."
"Are we not behaving like pirates?" Lami joked, finding she didn't mind his lively demeanor.
"You should try talking like one," Rakuyo decided, letting go of Sabo to rummage around inside his shirt. "Ah, here we go." He removed a small black object and fixed it over Lami's head, nodding with satisfaction as the eyepatch settled over her right eye. "Now, try saying 'yar'!"
"Y-yar?" Lami echoed, reaching up to fumble with the strap of the eyepatch before it caught on her hair.
"Terrible," Sabo shook his head. "Not convincing at all."
"Say it with conviction, lass! C'mon Sabo, show her how," Rakuyo urged.
Sabo shrugged, deciding there was no other course but to simply go with it, and he found his mood lifting as he caught Lami's eye. She looked as threatening as Luffy when he tried to puff himself up to show how 'dangerous' he was. "Well, okay then. Let's practice your piracy skills, Lami."
...
It never ceased to amaze Sabo how often his stealth skills failed to work with his brothers. Even when he knew he wasn't making any sound at all, it was as if his presence alone could rouse them from the deepest sleep.
Luffy didn't seem to be aware of why he was up, simply flopping into Sabo's arms while Ace turned on the light.
"Where were you?" Ace asked, rubbing his eyes while trying to stifle a yawn.
"I was up on deck," Sabo answered, scooping Luffy up and draping him over one shoulder. "Did I wake you guys?"
"I guess," Ace shrugged. "Couldn't sleep?"
"Yeah, went on a walk to clear my head," Sabo answered. "Help me get Luffy back into his bed?"
"Good luck with that, he was clinging to me right before you came in," Ace snorted.
Sabo shifted his weight so he could get a look at Luffy, grinning when it earned him a loud snore right in the face. "Well, it's fine. I don't mind. Anyway, I ran into Lami and Rakuyo on deck and we were chatting. Rakuyo even got her to wear an eyepatch and practice being a pirate."
Ace raised an eyebrow, then shrugged. "Well, sounds like fun." He moved to turn the light off again, and Sabo's stomach clenched as the serious side of his conversation with Lami came rushing back.
"Wait," he hurried forward to stop Ace, Luffy's head flopping a little on his shoulder. They both paused to see if Luffy had woken, but Luffy's response was only to wrap around Sabo as much as he could in his sleep and resume snoring. "Sorry… can we talk for a second?"
"Sure," Ace headed to the bottom bunk and sat down, yawning again as Sabo joined him. "So, what's up?"
"I've been having nightmares," Sabo admitted. "That's why Bay gave me medicine to sleep."
"I already knew that," Ace muttered.
"I had a feeling, but I didn't want you to think I was trying to hide it. I mean, I was trying to hide it, but not because I didn't trust you or anything. It's just-"
"You don't have to justify yourself to me," Ace cut him off. "It's fine."
"It's not fine, Ace," Sabo protested. "Just hear me out, okay?"
Ace crossed his arms over his chest to try and disguise his awkwardness, but he didn't interrupt again.
"I don't like feeling weak or powerless. I know, I know, none of us do… but I didn't even know how powerless I was until I was back with the nobles. Even then, all I managed in the end was to try and run away, and if you hadn't been there…"
"I hate talking about that time," Ace muttered in the silence that followed.
"So do I." Sabo looked to his feet with a sigh. "Anyway… I guess it was important to me to hide it, because I felt like I was the only one who wasn't getting stronger."
"What are you talking about? We're mostly even with matches still, and Luffy always loses-"
"I don't mean like that," Sabo interrupted with a frustrated huff. "I mean… you actually told Marco your biggest secret, the thing that freaks you out the most-"
"Because you convinced me I should, and I was being unfair to Luffy."
"-and Luffy doesn't even get scared about being kidnapped by Bluejam, or fire, or any of that stuff anymore," Sabo raised his voice a little, scowling at Ace's interjection. "And I couldn't even admit that I'm still afraid of fire."
Ace deflated. He looked down at his hands. It took Sabo a few moments to realize that the reason Ace hadn't wanted to talk about it or let him finish might have been because he hadn't wanted his own fears confirmed.
"Ace," Sabo reached out to put a hand on his shoulder, causing Luffy to flop again. "I'm not nervous or scared when it's you, okay? I might jump at first, but once I see it's your fire, I can calm down. The reason I insisted on talking to you about this is because I want to make sure you understand that."
"Did Lami tell you to say that?" Ace mumbled. "So it'd make me feel better?"
"You really think I'm only saying something because someone else told me to?" Sabo asked, and the sharpness of his tone had Ace drooping.
"No. I'm being a jerk. Sorry," Ace lifted his head, studying Sabo's expression. "Did you ever try that medicine Bay gave you? To help you sleep?"
"A little," Sabo shrugged. "I didn't like it. Made me too groggy, and if I did have a nightmare, it was harder to wake up. It's not like I'm having them every night or anything, either. The last few months, it's only been a handful of times."
"You should wake me up when it happens," Ace decided. "So you have someone to keep you company."
Sabo smiled. "You sure?"
"Thatchy, food…" Luffy mumbled, causing them to turn their attention on their younger brother and make sure he hadn't actually woken up.
"Is he chewing on you? And yeah, I'm sure," Ace said with a wary glance at Luffy's head.
"Only a little. Doesn't hurt," Sabo joked. "Let's try to go back to bed. If Rakuyo was any indication, half the crew is gonna be hungover in the morning and I foolishly agreed to deck-cleaning duties with Fossa's division first thing."
"Wow, sucks to be you," Ace teased, getting up and grabbing the bottom of his bunk so he could simply pull himself up and avoid having to climb the ladder.
Sabo snorted in response, carefully prying Luffy off of his shoulder and settling him on the bed. Once he'd turned out the light and joined him, he pulled the blankets up over Luffy first, settling for having them stop at his mid-chest instead of his chin from the way Luffy rolled and latched onto him. A smile crept onto his face at the way Luffy clung in his sleep and he slid his arm under Luffy's neck to help cushion him, settling his hand on Luffy's upper back.
"Thanks for telling me, Sabo."
Sabo looked to Ace's bunk, smile widening. Ace was just out of sight, but he didn't need to be able to see his freckled brother to know what he must have looked like in that moment. Arms folded behind his head, pensive look on his face… of course he'd wait to say that until he was safely hidden from view.
"You can always ask, you know," Sabo reminded him in a light tone. "We're brothers. Special brothers if you go by Luffy logic."
"Maybe just this once, we'll use Luffy logic," Ace chuckled in response. "So, do you think Lami's sticking around?"
"Yeah," Sabo closed his eyes. "An eyepatch really suits her."
Ace snorted. He stared at the ceiling for a few moments before speaking again. "Hey, Sabo?"
"One of these days, Luffy's going to wake up while we're talking and complain that we're having big-brother-secret-conversations again."
"Tell him he can join in when he's our big brother."
"Yeah, sure, make his head explode, got it," Sabo retorted.
"Do you think I should tell someone else?"
Sabo was silent for a moment, the weight of that question hanging in the air. He knew exactly what Ace meant, and the fact that Ace was the one suggesting it had his eyes widening in delight. "You want to?"
"Not really… but we've been on this ship for like seven months. I thought, maybe if I told Thatch or Izo, since they were also the ones we met in East Blue…"
"I think it's a great idea," Sabo immediately reassured him. "Even if it takes the next seven years, I think you should tell them as soon as you feel comfortable - or as comfortable as you can get. There's also Haruta. He's closer in age and spends the most time with us."
"I want to tell Haruta, and the others… and Whitebeard. I just… don't know," Ace finished lamely, closing his eyes. "I feel like I trust them enough, but I'm not naive enough to think everyone's going to handle it the same way Marco did."
"We're heading for the next island, right? Let's wait until we dock, and then you can try telling one of them. If they take it badly, we ditch them and stay on whatever island it is," Sabo reasoned.
"You say that like you know we won't be leaving," Ace muttered, opening his eyes again.
"I trust them, Ace. But I trust you more, so if you ever change your mind about staying, I'm on your side."
"What about Luffy?" Ace asked.
"Oh, please," Sabo almost snorted, which had Ace's cheeks burning.
"Yeah, even I felt dumb asking," Ace admitted. He waited to see if Sabo had anything else to say, but within a few minutes, Sabo's breathing evened out and it seemed Ace was the only one left awake. He sat up halfway to glance at the bottom bunk, smiling at the sight of Luffy draped across Sabo and both boys fast asleep.
The thought of being rejected hurt more now than it had in the beginning and he wondered how Sabo had picked up on his fear. The last few months had been spent carefree and almost perfect, but he'd still skirted around calling Whitebeard 'Oyaji', even when there was honestly no one else Ace could think of who would make a better father.
He wanted to trust them. He desperately wanted to feel the same way he'd felt when he'd told Marco. Whitebeard had called him his son, and everyone treated him like family. He should have told them all in the beginning, before he'd gotten so attached, just in case he wound up losing them.
Two weeks, he reminded himself, closing his eyes and listening to the sound of Luffy's snoring. I'll tell Thatch in two weeks.
...
Koala had never looked at her mother as if she were looking at a stranger. Not even the day she'd been returned, after years of struggling not to forget her face - her voice, her touch… Koala had been certain nothing would ever make her feel as if her own mother was foreign to her.
It was a sickening thought as she looked into her mother's eyes and realized she didn't see her mother anymore. She saw a woman whose actions, while arguably spurred by good intentions, had been wrong. A woman whose frightful whispers to cover her back and stop talking about the Fishmen had been born of both fear for Koala's safety… and guilt.
How foolish she must have seemed to the adults. Their anger at her willingness to flaunt the things they wanted to keep hidden seemed so obvious in hindsight. They were all in on it. For all her dreams of helping the world become more tolerant, less ignorant of things they didn't understand, she had been the ignorant one the entire time.
"It's all true, then?" Koala's voice shook, but she needed to get the words out. She needed to hear it, even if she already knew the answer. "You traded Uncle Tiger's life for mine?"
"Koala," her mother reached for her, but she didn't see anything comforting about those arms this time. She recoiled, as if she thought they might burn her, and her mother's eyes swam with tears in response. "Koala, please, we didn't have a choice-"
"Didn't have a choice? Didn't have a choice?!" Koala echoed, her voice pitching with distress. "You always have a choice!"
"The world isn't as simple as you might think!" Her mother's composure snapped, desperation in her voice. "You would have gone back to being a slave if we hadn't made that deal-"
"And you think it's okay to kill the one who saved me?" Koala argued.
"I am your mother! Of course I would!"
Koala closed her eyes, clenching both fists as the bile rose in her throat. She understood. She truly did, and no matter how angry she was, how betrayed she felt, she couldn't blame her mother for the choice she'd made. It wasn't her mother's hand that had killed Fisher Tiger. It was the world, every stupid rule made by the world that had led to his death.
The adults who had gotten fed up with her brazen attitude and revealed the cause of his death to her - they weren't at fault either. They feared her tattoo because of what it represented. A world where pirates were the heroes and the world government could condone the slavery and torture of anyone, so long as the tenryuubito branded them.
How could she allow herself any sort of peace in a world like that? Would she someday have children of her own, watch them be taken away, and make choices like the ones her mother had made to get her back, all the while helpless to do anything with her own two hands?
No. Once upon a time, that could have been an option, but Koala had seen too much, lived despite all the odds, and she couldn't bow her head and tell herself everything would be okay. She couldn't squander the gift the Sun Pirates had given her and turn a blind eye to the suffering of others simply because she was no longer suffering.
Koala's eyes opened. "I forgive you, mom," she murmured, looking away at the hopeful look that appeared on her mother's face at those words. "I understand that you felt you had no choice."
"Koala…" The relief in her voice was almost tangible, thick enough to choke on.
"But I can't forgive the world," Koala continued, turning away. "I can't stand by and accept it anymore."
"What are you talking about? Koala-"
She evaded her mother's grasp, shaking her head. "It's the world that needs to change, and if I don't try to change it, I'm part of the problem. I'm leaving. I can't live here anymore."
Koala winced as her mother made another grab at her, one hand locking around her upper arm like a vice.
"Koala, don't talk like that! What do you mean 'leaving'?! You're just a child! Only twelve years old-"
"Old enough to be a slave," Koala snapped, jerking her arm away. "Old enough to be considered a liability. Old enough to be the reason a great man is dead." She softened her voice a little when she saw how desperate her mother looked. "I still love you, and I'll always love you, but the only way I can forgive you - this island, myself - is if I know I'm doing something about the real problem."
"Where will you go? How? What if you're taken away again?!"
Koala shook her head. "I'm not a little girl anymore, mom. I haven't been in a long time. I learned a lot while I was with Uncle Tiger and the others. I promise I'll be okay." She turned to the stairs, and the sight of the sun emblazoned on her upper back, peeking out over the top of her dress, had her mother reaching out one last time.
"Koala!"
Koala pulled away, meeting her eyes with determination. She had a stronger will, a stronger calling - and even if she wound up locked in her room or chained to the fireplace, she would leave. The only difference would be the terms she left on.
Her mother saw it too, swallowing another protest and pulling back. "Just don't leave tonight," she pleaded.
"The merchants are leaving tonight and I'm going to buy passage on their ship," Koala answered softly, looking away. "If I don't go now, it could be months before another non-marine ship comes."
"You don't have to make such a hasty choice-"
"I can't look at anyone on this island right now," Koala argued. "I've been trying to help them understand, to teach them about what happened to me and how the Fishmen shouldn't be feared just for being Fishmen - and this whole time, everyone knew! Everyone whispered behind my back because they knew I was the only one in the dark. I can't stay here another night!"
"At least stay for dinner," her mother pleaded in a last ditch effort.
"It should only be a couple of weeks to the next island," Koala murmured, climbing the stairs without looking back. "I'll write to you."
When she reached her room, she had to close the door and lean against it, tears stinging her eyes. The sound of her mother weeping at the bottom of the stairs was enough to shake her resolve, but the angry accusations of the woman whose children she had been discussing her tattoo with were still ringing in her ears. It was loud enough to drown out almost anything else.
...
A/N: Thanks for reading, and once again, sorry I wasn't able to reply to the reviews. I loved reading every single one of them, but my brain is a scumbag sometimes and just won't let me communicate like a person.
~Mithril