Trauma

Requested by someone anonymous from Wattpad

TW: PTSD, abuse

The sound of the television playing bounced from the walls of Jay's apartment. The next day was their day off, so Hailey and Jay decided to cuddle up on the couch and watch some TV. Jay was switching the channels, trying to find something to watch, while Hailey was resting her head on his chest. She could hear his heart beating, while Jay's other hand played with her golden locks. The news channel suddenly came on, and the sound of the reporter's voice filled the apartment. The reporter was a woman who spoke with much calmness in her voice like she has been doing her job for a very long time. "At this point, the police were able to intervene before the parents could do more harm to the child," the reporter said. The reporter's voice started to fade as Hailey focused on what was happening in the crime scene. The reporter was standing in front of an average looking home where swarms of police cars and ambulances were surrounding it. A police officer can be seen cautiously carrying a little girl with blond hair out of the house. She looked so frail due to her sickly body. Hailey was so focused on the scene playing on the television that when Jay switched the channel, her head shot up from his chest. Jay snapped his head towards Hailey. His concern was evident by the way his eyebrows furrowed and the way his eyes bore into her soul. "What's wrong?" he asks. "Switch it back," Hailey says about the news channel. Jay followed Hailey's request as he didn't know what triggered herto act that way since he wasn't focused on what was playing on the television a while ago. "The child's identity will remain anonymous due to her age, but right now as you can see, she is being transported to the hospital to be examined," the reporter's voice once again echoed through the apartment. Jay finally knew why Hailey acted that way, but he didn't know why she was sitting straight up and had a focused look on her face.

"That's the latest news for now on this current case. Going back to you now, Marty," the reporter said as she ended her segment and the broadcast switched back to the main studio. Jay looked at Hailey. The way she stared blankly at the television screen told him she was lost in her own thoughts Out of the blue, a lone tear fell from Hailey's left eye. "Hail," Jay's concern and soft voice can be heard over the sound of the news. This snapped Hailey out of her thoughts. "Hm," Hailey says as she turns her head towards Jay. It was clear that the news segment pulled her past demons back to the surface of her mind with how emptiness replaced the usual sparkle in her eyes . "Anything you wanna talk about?" Jay asks. With how Hailey's selflessness and caring behaviour rubbed on Jay, the couple was able to build their trust and strengthen their relationship with late night disclosures of their fears and past traumas that haunted their whole beings. Being in a relationship with Hailey for almost two years, Jay had no doubt that Hailey's past memories are taunting her right now. He thought that it would be better for him to wait for her to talk about it with him rather than pushing it. "I was almost like that little girl," Hailey pauses and a light tremble in her voice escapes her. "I was in grade school when I told my English teacher about what my dad was doing. She called my parents, but they just told her that I was crazy and that I just needed attention. When I got home that day, my mom was somewhere in her bedroom and I was sure she was trying not to cry from what she knew was gonna happen to me. My dad was on the couch with beer bottles littered across the living room. He was waiting for me. From that day on, I never told another soul about what was happening in my home," Hailey chokes out. He appreciated how Hailey was trying to open up to him about her past but to see her like this, trying to force it out, he couldn't bear it. "Hailey," Jay mumbles as he brings her into a tight embrace. They stayed like that until Hailey calmed down from the flood of tears that came rushing from her eyes. Hailey's sniffles slowly stopped, then she broke off her hug with Jay. She stared at the man who she called as her lover. She couldn't push down the ever growing love for this man. The way his eyes softened every time he looked at her. The way his touch shoved away the haunting voices of her past back to their prison. The way his heart would continue to seek for her. She found herself falling deeper and deeper into the abyss of his love, she knew she wouldn't ever be able to climb back out. She found herself giving a small smile to Jay. "Wanna go to bed?" Jay asks. Hailey nodded and the two went off to prepare for the night.

The rough winds of the desert were blowing. Grains of sand striking against his face. Jay looked at his surroundings, then at himself. He saw the camouflage sleeve of his uniform. The sound of continuous gunshots from assault rifles filled the air. Screams filled the battlefield. "Halstead! Get a move on!" Jay hears someone shout, but he couldn't see who it was. He was led to a doorway. Everything around him suddenly faded as he saw the same 8 year old dark-skinned little girl with a beautiful face that he sees every time he has this nightmare. The doorway flashed in front of him. He knew what was going to happen—what was on the other side of that closed door. He didn't want to open it, but he couldn't control his arm as it moved towards the doorknob and he saw the kid. A gruesome scene of the death of an 8 year old girl flashed in front of him. "Jay," he hears a very familiar voice. His head snapped around as he tried to look for the source of the sound. "Jay," he hears again. The sound was coming from a woman, but he didn't know who it was. "Jay!" the woman said louder than before. The surroundings went black, then his eyes opened to the sight of his bedroom. He was sitting on his bed as the sound of his panting breaths filled the silence of his bedroom. He felt a hand gently caress his back. His body suddenly lost control of its reflex as it snapped towards where the person was and immediately grabbed their hand.

A gasp broke out of him and his hand trembled at his action. "Hailey," he says out of breath as he sees Hailey wearing one of his shirts. Hailey gently wrapped her hand on Jay's tight hold on her. Through the years of their partnership, Hailey knew exactly what the look on his face meant. Jay's grip immediately loosen around Hailey's. His shocked expression turned into an apologetic one. "I'm… sorry," Jay tried to find his words. The heat from her hand on his cheek brought him the warmth he needed to calm down. "I'm good, I'm good. Anything you wanna let out?" Hailey's loving tone registered into his mind. Jay started to blankly stare at the opposite wall as he recalled the events of his nightmare. "I had a bad dream," Jay mumbles . "I was brought back to the day… the day that I saw that little girl…" his voice faded as he pictured the little girl again. Although she knew how these nightmares mocked him every night, she was willing to fend them off even if it would take her whole life. The couple sat on the bed in silence for a while as Hailey gave Jay time to bring himself back to the present.

After a while, Jay's heavy pants slowly faded as he finally gathered his composure. Hailey's wandering eyes landed on Jay with relief settling on her. It was hard to see Jay like this even if she sees it every other night. She rubbed Jay's back telling him that she was still there after all the years that passed. Jay's green eyes found Hailey and the feeling of gratitude washed over him. Jay felt her lean arms wrap around him. "I'm here and I'll always be here," Hailey's reassuring voice gave Jay a sense of protection against his demons. "Me too," Jay says as his lips met her head. His strong arms wrapped around her waist, showing her how thankful he was for her. She never left him even though he had troubles dealing with his past. The blonde woman was the one responsible for getting him out of the dark hole he was digging for himself. She was his anchor and he was hers. They were keeping each other from sinking back to rock bottom.