Deidara stared at the bowl of steaming hot herbal medicine in front of her, blinking slowly. Then she glanced up at Rin, who was sitting opposite her with a knowing look on her face, resting her chin in her palm.
Around them, the environment was bustling, people hurrying about the refugee centre's only cafeteria to get the best pickings of breakfast. The overworked serving lady gave the refugees bleary looks, her eyes sunken into her sockets.
"What is this, hm?" Deidara asked, picking up the bowl and sniffing it. The scent of herbs filled her nostrils, and she suspected that it would be a bitter concoction. The bowl warmed her hands, and she had to keep adjusting her hold on it so she would not be burned.
"Well," said Rin, smiling. "It's just something to calm your nerves, but it's also something to make sure that no unexpected surprises happen, if you catch my drift."
"Ah...!" A deep flush spread over Deidara's cheeks, and she closed her eyes, trying to remain a serene countenance. "Thanks." After blowing on the liquid a few times to chase away the heat, she started to take little sips of it. Her cheeks grew rosy as she drank, no longer from embarrassment but from the hot substance she was consuming. As she drank, Daichi, holding Hikari's hand, led them both over to their mother's table, sitting down on her either side.
It'd been a full day since Sasori had left Konoha... possibly for good. But life went on, as it always would. Rin had been afraid that Deidara would close herself off from the her and the others completely, and was thankful that this did not seem to be the case.
In a way, the blonde was more distant and aloof than before, but that was inevitable.
Rin let out a heavy sigh, wrapping her arm around Hikari's small body as the girl buried into her side, eyes half-closed in content. "How are you doing, Deidara?"
Deidara paused in her drinking. "As well as I can be, I guess." She put the bowl down, meeting Rin's gaze uncertainly. "I... I just don't know where to go from here. What's going to happen to us next, hm?"
The brown-haired widow pondered the question for a bit. "I don't know," she confessed, reaching over the table and entwining her fingers with Deidara's. "All I can say for certain is that it's up to us to decide what we do from here. Mebuki-san has given us almost limitless opportunities—we are in charge of our futures. We'll find jobs, proper homes... We'll make a new life. A new future."
Future, huh? Deidara squeezed Rin's hands, glancing up at the white ceiling for a brief moment. Then she met Rin's stare. "I guess I'll start by..." she trailed off. What will I start with? What did she have on her agenda anyway, asides from repaying Asuma for the leg? Rin nodded encouragingly as Deidara deliberated. "Clay," she decided in the end. "I'll start doing my art again—my explosions!" Her voice rose a little from excitement at that. "And then..." She shook her head. "I'll just see where it takes me from there, hm. You?"
"I'm a little unsure myself. For now, I'm just... going to take some time off. To mourn," she elaborated, her smile dimming a little. Then she added, "Did you know they added a grave marker for Obito? I... I think Kakashi-kun had something to do with it."
Daichi, who had been eating an apple, paused. Then he continued eating, his gaze focused on the table.
They ate their breakfast in mostly silence, only talking when others joined them. Laughs were shared, but they were few and far between.
"Why don't we go?" Deidara suggested when Daichi crunched his apple to the core. "Visit Obito, that is. Otherwise he'll get lonely, knowing how clingy he was, hm..." She smiled weakly, and Rin managed one back.
"You're right. Daichi, Hikari, let's go visit daddy, okay?"
"Oh, we're going to see otou-san?" Hikari perked up, eyes widening. "Aniki, did you hear that?"
"Yeah," Daichi said, a little hesitant. "I heard."
"Going to see Obito, huh?" commented Kisame, holding a hot bowl of congee in his hands as he descended upon his seat. "I might go visit the memorial park later, to say hi to Anko." He ruffled Chihiro's hair. The girl was seated next to him, a small smile curling the corner of her lips. "What do you say, kid?"
"Sure, Kisame-sensei!" she chirped. "And then we can go practice some cool sword moves, right?" She snapped her fingers, as if remembering something. "Oh! We should go see Itsuki-kun and Mikoko-san as well..." The orphan grew more subdued and Kisame's brow lowered. "We should get flowers." She blinked her tears back. "Something that they would like."
That's not a bad idea. Deidara turned to Rin, and they both nodded.
"We should go get cleaned up first," Rin pointed out. "Come, kids, to the baths..." The remaining members of the Uchiha-Nohara family exited the room, likely heading for the family bathing room. If Deidara wanted to clean herself, she'd have to head for the ladies' showers.
As the blonde woman left, Chihiro stopped pushing the peas on her plate around and glanced up at Kisame. "Are we going to be okay?"
"Kid," Kisame let out a heavy sigh, "you always ask the hard questions, don't cha? But to answer it..." Discreetly, he looked around the table, where all of their survivor group was sitting. Well, most of them, anyway. Itachi was the only one to glance up from his plate and return the shark-man's gaze. "Yeah," Kisame said eventually, though he could not be certain, "I think we will."
There was a loud squeal of metal as Deidara twisted the shower taps, adjusting the output of cold and hot water. The shower head spat a few drops of water before a steady flow emerged, making the hair on Deidara's head damp and heavy. The water was the perfect temperature, and Deidara sighed in bliss, running her fingers through her blonde locks to remove twists and tangles.
What am I really going to do? she asked herself, the answer stretched out in front of her like the cold, intimidating road to hell. Biting the inside of her cheek, she pushed her hair out of her face, slicking it back to reveal a small, barely noticable widow's peak. What was there to do here? What the hell was everyone else going to do?
Inherently, she knew the answer.
Live.
That was what they had been fighting for out there. The opportunity to live, to not have their final moments being mauled to death by eldritch creatures. She jerked on her hair so hard that she almost winced. Somehow, it felt like she was slowly dying instead, even when others were starting to move on. Starting to live again. She'd seen Konohamaru on her way back from the detainment centre; the boy had been with his best friends, Moegi and Udon, as well as an adult chaperone that Deidara chalked up to being their new schoolteacher. They'd gone to lunch, she had learned the same day, to celebrate their success in winning over the Three Councils. She'd merely watched from a distance, disbelieving and numb.
She couldn't have even brought herself to be enraged that day. In a way, they had won, but...
In washing her hair, Deidara's hand grazed over the black, blocky numbers inked onto the nape of her neck. She froze, watching water drip from her nose for what seemed like an eon. Then she continued, tilting her face toward the oncoming spray of water.
What did I do before him? she inquired then, thinking that it would be an easier question to answer. But perhaps the explosion had addled her brain a little more than she had thought; she could not conjure a plausible answer that left her satisfied. All those things she had back in Akatsuki were gone. Scattered in the wind. Shisui was gone, Obito was gone, the dozens and dozens of civilians that she had been acquainted with were gone. Sasori was gone, too, the Yamanaka Clan were all but extinct, and Uchiha and Hyuuga without heirs—
She didn't want to think about it anymore.
Deidara quickly cleaned herself up, turning off the water and grabbing the towel that hung outside, wrapping it around her body.
It was when an uneven footfall reached his ears that Daichi, leaning against a bare maple tree trunk, turned to see Deidara and his mother heading toward him. His little sister was a slight distance away from him, entertaining herself with the snow around them. She packed the ice into snowballs, a small, satisfied smile on her face as she did so.
"Hey, kiddo." Deidara ruffled his hair, and warmth and affection for her instantly came over him. A small flush reached his cheeks, and he closed his eyes in embarrassment. Noticing, Deidara smiled lopsidedly, pulling him into a hug. "Ready to go, hm?"
"Ready..." Daichi mumbled into her torso, vaguely registering that she was wearing a winter coat over her usual white blouse and green skirt. "Okaa-san, are we bringing him flowers and incense?"
"Yes," Rin murmured, palming his head gently. "Of course we will."
The walk to the memorial park wasn't long. Hikari ran ahead of them most of the way, enjoying the crunch of snow beneath her boots without a care in the world. And why would she care, anyway? The monsters were gone. They were safe now. Everything was right again.
Little florets fell into the snow as the bouquet of flowers in Deidara's arms shifted from side to side. They'd stopped by the florist on the way. Everything was supposed to be right again. Why does this feel like a dream, then? Like some nightmare disguised as a happy world? She watched Hikari throw snow into the air and twirl around the falling flakes of ice, her cheeks flushed with excitement and the cold.
"Hey," Daichi scolded, catching up to her, "stop playing around, imouto! We're gonna go see otou-san, so you can't look so messy. Geez." He proceeded to brush the snow off from the front of her coat and adjusted her scarf. Rin shot Deidara an amused look, one which the blonde returned easily.
"Kids bounce back easily, don't they?" Rin remarked offhandedly, lifting her finger to her lips thoughtfully. "Sometimes, I envy them. But then I remember... that they're going to grow up without a father..." She leaned into Deidara. "But in the end, at least they'll get to grow up. I feel like that's the only think I have to offer them anymore." The memorial park came into view, and Rin chewed on her lip as Daichi and Hikari slowed down, seeming hesitant. "I really wish... that I could do more for them, Deidara."
"I..." Deidara lowered her gaze as they approached the children, who were still staring at the gates of the memorial park. "Yeah." Inwardly, she smacked herself at her lack of tact, but Rin didn't seem to pay any heed to her verbal stumble.
They walked past the gates, Daichi glancing up warily at the metal above their heads momentarily.
"Over there," Rin said, pointing at two people standing over a grave marker. From the color of their hair, it wasn't hard to tell who they were. Deidara was glad that they were there to act as their beacons of light; she wasn't sure if she could stand searching for Obito's marker.
Naruto and Kakashi turned their heads as Deidara and Nohara-Uchiha family approached them. Naruto immediately grinned, his eyes curving. He lifted an arm up in greeting. Deidara was not blind to the tired lines beneath his eyes. He was grieving, too, she reminded herself, even if he didn't show it. The Uzumaki boy was strong. Stronger than her, she felt.
"Hi, Rin-san," Naruto said quietly, a little unsure about addressing his former boss. "You're here to see boss, too, huh?"
"Hello, Naruto-kun." She dipped her chin at Kakashi, who nodded back. "Kakashi-kun."
"Oh, Deidara's here, too." The blonde in question lifted her arm up in greeting before letting it fall to her side again.
Kakashi, who hadn't said anything yet, moved a little out of the way to allow room for Rin, Deidara, and the kids. Naruto was altogether pushed out of the picture, but he didn't seem to mind, tucking his hands into the pockets of his winter coat as he solemnly observed the quiet grieving.
"Hi, otou-san," whispered Hikari, putting her hands together in a prayer position and closing her eyes. Daichi followed her example, only he didn't say anything beforehand. Every so often, his brow would twitch, and he would mutter something unintelligible under his breath.
Deidara evened out her breathing, vaguely aware of Rin next to her doing the same thing. Then she knelt, the flowers in her arms jostling. She was about to put them down when Hikari pulled on her sleeve, a little sheepish.
"Yes, Hikari-chan?"
"Can... Can I give the flowers to otou-san?"
For a second, Deidara almost choked up. Then she smiled, nodding. "Of course, yeah. Here." She passed the flowers to Hikari, who started to beam.
Daichi made room for his sister. "Put 'em here."
Hikari did. "Do you think otou-san will like it?"
Rin was about to answer when Kakashi beat her to it. "Of course he will," Kakashi affirmed, speaking for the first time since they had arrived. "He'll love it, actually. Obito loved flowers." A chuckle rumbled in his chest. "He was probably the only other man besides Gai that I knew who really appreciated them." And he would deny it every time we brought it up, but we all knew better.
Deidara seemed to share the same thought, her eyes lighting up a little as she remembered Obito's bluster.
"Kakashi-kun's right," Rin added encouragingly. "Go on, my little light."
Hikari hesitated one last time before nodded resolutely, placing the flowers beside his grave marker. "I miss you, otou-san."
We all do, Deidara put in silently. Wherever you are now, you idiot... I hope you're doing well.
"Now," Kakashi broke the silence, "why don't I treat you guys to a snack?"
Kushina slurped up her third bowl of noodles, Karin gaping at her in a mixture of horror and fascination.
"Phew!" Kushina sighed after finishing the broth. "That really hit the spot, ne, Karin-chan?" Karin continued to stare, so much so that Kushina blushed slightly. "Now don't go looking at me like that, 'ttebane!" She wagged her finger in front of Karin's face, the younger female's eyes following the movement. "You didn't even finish your soup!"
"I... wasn't hungry," Karin said lamely. Wow, how can she pack away so much?! For such a small woman, she could give Naruto and Choji a run for their money! Kushina was pretty cool, but Karin was a little embarrassed to admit that.
"Ah, I get you." Kushina let out another sigh, this one heavier. "Everything's been really gloomy lately, hasn't it?" She glanced around the restaurant, where people were talking in mostly subdued voices. The last time she had come to this restaurant, it had been a lot more vibrant. Konoha's wilting, and there's no rain to be seen. Just endless snow. "Especially after the trial. I don't know the whole story, but that heartbroken look on that woman's face made my gut lurch, 'ttebane."
"Maybe that was just the ramen you ate before," Karin joked.
Kushina snorted. "Maybe. But I never get full on ramen, so that wasn't it. In fact, when I saw her face fall..." She rested her head on her palm. "It made me wonder: was that what I looked like when I heard the news about Minato? And if it wasn't... I'm willing to bet it was pretty damn close, 'ttebane. I've heard just as many bad things about Akasuna no Sasori as your average Konoha citizen, but from everything that you and Naruto have told me, and everything that came out at the trial..." She shook her head sadly. "Have you ever been in love, Karin?"
She couldn't help it. Karin blurted, "Yes! I-I mean..."
A sly smile. Karin inwardly cursed. "Ohh~! My cute little niece has a crush? Tell me, who is it, 'ttebane?"
"I-I—"
"Hey, kaa-san!" Naruto suddenly appeared at their table, making Karin squeak. From all the chakra signatures in the restaurant, she had completely overlooked Naruto's approaching one. But now that she was tuned in, she noticed that Kakashi, Deidara, and Rin and her children were coming toward them as well.
"You idiot!" barked Karin, shaking her fist at her yellow-haired cousin. "Don't just pop out like that out of nowhere! Geez! You almost gave me a heart attack!" Secretly, though, she was glad for Naruto's interruption.
"Aw, sorry, Karin-chan." Naruto chuckled, rubbing the back of his head. "I thought you would've seen me comin', though. Aren't you a sensor, 'ttebayo? Were you talking about something really secret? Is that why?"
"Sh-shut up, Naruto-boke!" Karin harrumphed and turned away from her cousin as Kushina laughed heartily.
"I don't get it," Naruto was saying as he was joined by the rest of his party. "What did I do wrong?"
"Oh, my son," Kushina chuckled, wiping a tear from her eye. "You have a lot to learn about women, 'ttebane!" She put her arm around Naruto's neck, yanking him toward her. "C'mere, you!"
"Waaahahaha!" Naruto laughed as he was noogied. "Kaa-saaaaan!"
"Oi, Naruto, how old are you?" Kakashi teased.
"Not too old for ramen, that's for sure!" the blond retorted, trying to pry himself from his mother's vice-like grip.
Soon, all of them were seated, Naruto squashing a pouting Karin against the wall as he made room for Deidara and Kakashi. Rin, Daichi, and Hikari occupied the opposite seat along with Kushina.
"Oh, boy, I'm starving," Naruto said.
Deidara chuckled. "Seriously? Breakfast was two hours ago, hm." She flagged down a brown-haired waitress. "Sumimasen!" She glanced around the table. "Who's paying, hm?" Her eyes landed on Kakashi, who quickly whipped out an edition of Icha Icha and buried his nose into it.
"Me, of course," said Kushina, sounding almost offended. "It's my treat, guys," she winked, "I'm the one with the moolah here. Eat as much as you want, 'ttebane!"
From how frazzled and tired the waitress looked, Deidara almost felt bad for making her take another order, especially one as large as the one they were currently giving her. Naruto, naturally, was ordering five large bowls of ramen, and the rest of them weren't exactly eating small either. The amount of sweat cutting through some of the heavy make-up on her face also gave her a dirty, hassled appearance.
Had Deidara flared her nostrils, she might have picked up on the underlying scent of dog on the woman.
Lunch passed by similarly to breakfast. They made some small talk, Kushina and Naruto contributing most of it. Karin interjected rudely or sourly sometimes, and Kakashi politely responded to everything in a way that made him seem more irritating than ever.
Everything was...
As Deidara drank her tea, she noticed Daichi scowling as Rin lifted more noodles into his bowl with her chopsticks, the boy telling her that she needed to eat more than him.
... Surprisingly normal.
So normal that it almost physically hurt her. But she kept her cool, closing her eyes and smiling into the brim of her cup, even when her fingers were clutched so tightly around the glass that the joints in her digits were starting to ache. She willed herself to speak to them, alternating between amused and haughty, as she'd once been.
Wasn't this what I wanted? Wasn't it?
"Deidara." Kakashi's low voice broke her from her thoughts. "You alright?"
It was such a meaningless question.
"Yeah, I'm fine. It's kinda hot in here, though. I think I'll go out and take a walk around." Deidara stretched in her seat, starting to stand. "Thanks for lunch, Kushina-san."
Kushina smiled warmly at her. "It's no problem. But you're leaving so soon?"
She nodded tightly. "You guys go enjoy yourselves, hm. I just need some air."
As Deidara exited the ramen shop, she missed the way that her friends stared at her retreating back, their brows creased in a mixture of worry and sympathy.
"Sir, I didn't—"
"You did! I know you did, you damn, dirty whore!" the drunk slurred, bringing back his fist. "Give it back, thief!"
There was the sound of a loud, painful slap.
As she lay in a heap on the ground, dazed, the man spat at her.
"That'll teach you—ARGGHH!" he screamed in agony as he was suddenly bowled over by a large, growling shape. The drunk's eyes widened as he realized that he was suddenly face to face with fierce, angry dog, drool dripping from its jowls.
"Genmaru!" the woman shouted, pushing herself up and wincing. "Genmaru, don't!" The dog snarled at the assailant's face one more time before whining, jumping off the man's body.
The drunk, experiencing coherency for the first time, shot a terrified glance at the woman and her dog before dashing off.
The woman lowered her gaze. I bet he's going to tell my manager. I'll be fired again. She'd only lasted two days. Letting out a deep sigh, she palmed the head of her dog, practically feeling guilt tangled in his fur. "It's okay, Genmaru, it's not your fault. You were just protecting me." The dog yipped. "Why did I let him hit me?" She smiled wryly. "I guess... I felt like I deserved it."
Rubbing the red slap mark on her cheek, the woman undid her apron just as the drunk came around the building with the manager in tow. She didn't even listen to them as she walked over to her outraged manager, holding out the apron to him. He snatched it from her, yelling obscenities that she didn't really care for. As she turned her back on them, she covered her ears, a strained smile on her face. Even with her hands over her ears, she could still hear them. Feel their hatred.
Genmaru nudged her, whining again.
"You're right," the woman said, nodding. "Do you wanna go to the park?"
Genmaru led the way, his owner trailing not far behind. But then the dog stopped hearing his mistress's footsteps behind him, and the twisted his head around to see her with her face buried in her oil-stained hands. His wagging tail drooped sadly, padding over to his master to comfort her.
"I'm sorry, Genmaru," she wept. "Just give me a moment..." By the time she finished crying, all of her makeup had been washed off her face, revealing two red, fang-shaped tattoos marked on either of her cheeks. Anxiously, she spun, bumping into a girl and knocking her on her ass. "Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry—"
"Hey!" A smaller version of the girl she had knocked over yelled at her, and the woman almost flinched. "Watch where you're going!" Hyuuga Hanabi turned her back on her as she helped her sister up. "Are you okay, Hinata-nee?"
"F-fine, Hanabi-chan." Hinata smiled, brushing dust off her baggy jumper. "It was my fault as well, nee-san," she said, referring to the woman, who was taken aback by the elder sister's polite, forgiving demeanor. A rare thing to see in these times. "We were in a hurry to see our cousin. I'm very sorry for the inconvenience."
"I..." Inuzuka Hana had to keep her mouth from gaping open like an idiot. "I'm sorry, too. Er, I'm Hana." Damn! Why did I tell her my name?
"Oh! You are of the Inuzuka Clan, correct?" Hinata asked, smiling again. "My name is Hyuuga Hinata, and this is my sister, Hanabi-chan."
Is she happy to meet another member of a clan? Hana had immediately pinned the girls as Hyuuga based on their eyes and silky hair. She smiled wretchedly back. "You must be new around here." Of course she is. She must have escaped Ame and come to Konoha recently. "The Inuzuka Clan... there are so few of us now, that we are no longer considered a noble clan."
"What?" Hanabi raised a shocked eyebrow. "How come? They can do that to clans here? Strip them of their noble status?"
"Yes, when it calls for it." Hana reached up to touch the clan markings on her face. "There are only... three... of us now, so hardly a clan, let alone a noble one. The dogs don't count, you see." Otherwise there'd be five of us, not three. "I doubt that your clan is going to be recognized as a noble clan either."
"That doesn't matter to us, Hana-san," Hinata assured. "All we want is for our family to be together again." Her gaze darkened surprisingly at that, and Hana wondered if this had anything to do with their 'cousin'.
Hanabi nodded in agreement. "Right. We should go now, nee-chan. We have an appointment with the doctor later, remember? If we want to see Neji, we should go now!"
"Oh! You're right!" Hinata flustered. "It's good to m-meet you, Hana-san, but I'm afraid we must get going now."
"Ah..." Hana watched them go, looking a little lost. "Goodbye!"
"Dammit!" Shikamaru inched back as Ai Wei slammed her fist on the board, sending the pieces flying everywhere. She glared intensely at the Nara, seething. "How are you so good at this?! I've only won against you twice!"
Shikamaru couldn't help but smile. "All those tactics you've used... I've seen my father use them before. I've gotten over thirty-thousand ryo from you now. Are you ever going to pay up, you troublesome brat?"
The Nara and the red-haired girl were sitting under a tree, dressed in their winter coats with scarves, though Ai Wei was pulling hers off now as had grown warm from fuming.
"I want lunch," the girl said. "Since you have all the money, you're paying."
"Excuse me? You haven't paid me a single ryo of the amount that you owe me. Do you even have any money?"
"Argghh! Don't argue with me!" She pointed at him, grinning obnoxiously. "You may be my senior in age, but you're still an immigrant! Therefore, I exercise seniority."
Shikamaru yawned, stretching in his seat. "Go ahead, then. Seniors are the ones who are supposed to pay for their junior's food anyway..." A familiar chakra signature had him stirring and looking to the left, ignoring Ai Wei's ranting. "Hm? Deidara?"
The blonde woman was leaning against a tree a few metres away, seemingly lost in thought. Her chin was tilted toward the sky, and her eyes had this faraway expression.
Ai Wei's round face obscured his view. "Hello?" She turned to where Deidara was standing. "You know her or something?"
"Don't you?" Shikamaru retorted halfheartedly.
"I..." Ai Wei squinted before she cringed slightly. "Yes. Yes, I do. Wasn't she that killer's mistress? The one that got executed? How can she show her face in public like that, huh?! We should teach her a lesson!"
A muscle in Shikamaru's cheek twitched. "Oh yeah? Like what? Are you going to beat her up? Because I can bet all thirty thousand of those ryo you owe me that she'll kick your sorry ass, kid."
"What?!"
"Don't be annoying, Ai Wei." Shikamaru scowled.
"Eh?! Why are you suddenly so mad, huh?!"
"I'm mad," Shikamaru said lowly, "because for someone so smart, you can't seem to get your facts right." He spun around, his countenance darkening. "Let me get you started by telling you that no one was executed on that day. If you read the paper, then you would know. If you even took the time to get your head out of your ass and listen for once instead of talking, then maybe you would know better."
"... You're being really mean today, y'know." Ai Wei muttered out her response, her fire gone. Upon looking closely, he could see it in her eyes how uneasy and upset she was about his reaction.
"... Sorry." The Nara let out a small sigh. "Lunch is on me." He started packing up the shogi board and the pieces. "C'mon, let's go."
"Um...!" Ai Wei lowered her gaze as she fiddled with a piece before flicking it to Shikamaru's waiting palm. "I'm sorry, too. But... did you really mean what you said?"
He didn't hesitate, answering as he popped the shogi board and pieces into a scroll. "Yeah. I did. Now what do you want—noodles or rice?"
"Uh, rice today! At Tomoko-oba's, of course. No one does fried rice better than her."
"'Kay. You go on ahead, I'll just be a moment." Tomoko's was just around the corner, anyway, so it would be fine.
"Mm! But don't take too long!"
As Ai Wei scurried away, Shikamaru approached Deidara, who didn't seem to have noticed him, his grip on the scroll tightening as he neared her. When he got within a five metre radius from her, she finally turned to his direction, her blue eyes gleaming.
"Shikamaru-san," she greeted. "Hey."
"Hey yourself. What are you doing here?"
Deidara had seen Shikamaru coming from a mile away. Had known he was there with that little girl since she had arrived. It was almost unavoidable, from how heightened her senses had become after crawling out from a living nightmare. She'd learned to recognize their familiar, warm chakra signatures, identifying them from a sea of strangers.
"Hell if I know. I just needed to get away, hm."
Shikamaru glanced up at the sky, where the sun was just barely visible behind the clouds. It was getting close to mid-afternoon already. "If you have nothing to do right now, you should head over to the Gazette."
She perked up in interest. "Gazette?"
"Aa. The Leaf Gazette, where Fatso works. I was supposed to attend a job interview today to officially start working there, but I can't be bothered to go."
"Tch! Typical Nara, hm?" She tossed him a slight grin. "But why exactly do you want me to go there?"
"Isn't it obvious?"
"Shikamaru." Deidara's playfulness was gone, as well as Shikamaru's honorific. "I'm not a mind reader, so stop beating around the bush. And make it quick—isn't that kid waiting for you?"
"Today, three o'clock. Go to the interview in my place." Deidara's eyes widened slightly in surprise at how quickly he changed from musing to straightforward. "I'm not one to say please, so... Let me just say this bluntly. You're not in a good place right now. Everyone seems to be adjusting as best as they can, but you're the one that's most out of place. You know this, too." She stared blankly at him, but he knew she was paying close attention, even if she didn't want to. "I don't know what happened down there in the caves. I don't want to know, frankly. I'm not telling you to forget what happened, because I know you can't, but if you want to move forward, this is the first step." In the distance, they could hear Ai Wei call for Shikamaru. The younger teen started to backpedal. "Think about it."
It was only when he was gone that Deidara got her lips to move. "You..." What the hell, Nara? Should I thank you or bury you alive for that? She narrowed her eyes, glaring at the sky stretching out in front of her, taunting her with the illusion of endless possibilities. Then she relaxed her shoulders, pushing herself off the tree and walking off, her legs moving on autopilot. The Gazette, hm?
Sometimes, Deidara wondered why things turned out the way they did. Why good people died ("Why do the good people like otou-san die, okaa-san?" "When you're in a garden, which flowers do you pick?" "The prettiest ones."), why life was so fragile, so fleeting ("And when you pick them, what happens?" "They wilt faster."), and why bad things happened ("Why did you pick the flowers, musume-chan?" "Because they looked nice. I don't know. Is that bad?" "No. But sometimes bad things happen for no reason.")
She didn't like how these thoughts consumed her, as they had been doing lately. Before, she hadn't had enough time to do everything she wanted, so she spent the time she did have more on producing results rather than thinking about these pointless things.
Recently, time seemed to stretch like an endless, meandering road in front of her. There was suddenly so much of it, and she had nothing to occupy the space with. There was... simply nothing to do.
Which was why she found herself in a cluttered office, sitting in-between two other people. All three of them were facing none other than Akimichi Fatso, the atmosphere tense.
"Sir?" the girl on her left said hesitantly.
Deidara hadn't been expecting to be hired on the spot, but now that she thought about it, Shikamaru had probably planned this with that irritatingly big brain of his. She was thankful for the opportunity, but being shoved into a situation like this had her feeling off-kilter.
How had she ended up here anyway?
"You three... Pass!"
"What?" Deidara blurted as the girl beside her cheered, and the other candidate smiled. She ignored the girl, turning to the only person she was truly familiar with. "Choji?"
The chubby boy smiled sheepishly. "Ah, you see..."
"I'm so excited!" the girl next to Deidara babbled, her eyes like stars. "T-This is my dream job! Thank you so much, sir!"
Deidara sighed into her palm. "This was planned, wasn't it?"
"Well..." Choji hesitated. "Yeah, it kinda was."
Knew it. Everything went too well. Fatso hardly interviewed me, and he acted like he already knew the outcome before we even started. She wasn't sure how to feel about this. For her, things weren't supposed to come to her like this on a silver platter. Everything she had had up to this point, she had worked for it. Earned it. Having a job so easily handed to her... it left a bad taste in her mouth. But the job offered new opportunities—things that she definitely wouldn't have been able to secure without outside interference. Stability. An income. Reintegration into society. A future.
Deidara took a deep breath. "Thank you, Choji. Fatso-san," she acknowledged, "when do I start?"
"Today, of course! Your training, that is. We can't have you three wandering around the block without a clue of what to do or how to do it." With a great heave, Fatso placed a typewriter on his desk, papers scattering all over the place. "This here is what we use to write. It might look simple, but you have to learn how to use it with maximum efficiency." With a wave, he allowed them to admire it and touch it.
Intrigued, Deidara put her face close to the keys, noting the different kanji, hiragana, and katakana notations, each key numbered. Underneath the pale sunlight flitting through Fatso's blinds, the typewriter gleamed a proud, warm bronze.
"Amazing," Deidara's new female colleague said. "Are you going to teach us, sir?"
"No, no, I'm afraid not. I'll have to leave it to my assistants and others to help you. Speaking of, they should be coming very soon, so sit tight."
For the first time since she had arrived, Deidara allowed her mind to be filled with wonder and awe as she was guided through the use of the Leaf Gazette's gleaming typewriters. It was like the time she had watched and listened to Asuma tinker with the mechanics of his metalwork, the sight relaxing her and the sounds of tiny gears—or, in this case, tapping keys—soothing her being. Fatso had described them as simple, but Deidara found out that it wasn't so simple, and was astounded that she managed to grasp the general mechanics of it before her new colleagues. Prior to this, Choji had only been helping out his uncle with mere paperwork, and was completely inexperienced. The girl was learning faster than him, but tended to mix up her characters and made a lot of typos.
Deidara inched ahead, but by the end of the afternoon, the other two had almost caught up, their fingers trembling and their wrists aching. But it was a pleasant pain, they found, one that came from hard work.
"Good work, everyone!" Deidara glanced up from the tome she had been reading and translating its contents to its kanji variant as a practice exercise. They'd been placed in a room full of books and tables immediately after Fatso had dismissed them from his office hours ago. Now the broad Akimichi had appeared again, and looked quite pleased with the progress they had made. "Why don't I treat you all to dinner? My treat!"
"Ohh!" Deidara's new girl colleague—she had learned her name was Fumiko—beamed, completely erasing the tired, overworked expression she had had moments ago. "Thanks so much, sir! Come on, guys, let's go eat!"
"Sure, I'm down for it," Choji said agreeably. "Yakiniku Q again, Fatso-oji?"
Fatso let out a hearty laugh. "Of course! They serve the best barbecued meat in Konoha City! And you, Deidara? Would you like to come?"
"I…" Deidara glanced back at the translations she had been doing, sheets of typed up characters scattered all over the place. "Thank you, but I'll have to skip out, hm. I already made dinner plans, and I should clean this up." Bring it home, more like. It'll give me something to work on.
"Would you like a scroll?" Fatso produced one from his pants pocket. "You can use this to store up your typewriter." She blinked at him as he shoved the scroll into her hands. "Don't look so surprised, it's yours now, Deidara-san. Take care of it, won't you? Those things don't come cheap. And turn off the lights when you're done."
With that, they were gone. Only Choji had glanced backward once before leaving with the rest. As she organized her translations, Deidara could hear more voices joining Fumiko's and Fatso's. Humming quietly, she popped the now organized papers into the scroll, followed by the typewriter. Before she did, she admired it one last time under the yellow artificial light, tracing the pattern on the side of the machine that resembled leaves and flowers blooming in the spring. Then, with a small puff of smoke, she sealed it into the scroll with the papers.
Holding onto the scroll, she switched off the lights before exiting the building, which was gradually darkening as more and more people left their offices. There were some people still there, of course, working overtime; Deidara could see the lights of their working rooms left on. They'd likely be there past midnight.
As soon as she left the building, she was greeted by a strong gust of wind that whipped her hair back and chilled her cheeks. It had her throwing her coat on, buttoning it up expertly while somehow keeping hold of the scroll.
The moon was visible tonight; winter was going to be spring in a few weeks. Deidara tilted her chin skyward, gazing up at the white circle behind wispy clouds. From how large it hung in the sky, she felt as if she could almost reach up and snatch it from the air.
It was so close, yet so far away.
Her shoes tapped on concrete stairs as made her way back to the refugee centre, taking the rarely used route by the river to avoid the crowd.
I wonder what you're doing now… Danna. It'd only been a day since they had parted, yet it felt like it'd been so much longer, especially when she added up the week she had spent without him before the trial. She didn't like tempting fate, but Deidara had to silently ask, When am I going to see you again, hm?
She paused then, noticing the moon's reflection on the river, its waters flowing gently, lazily lapping at the bank. Then Deidara looked around, finding no one else present except her. She turned back to the water.
What an underappreciated view. Maybe it was old habit, maybe it was something else, but it had her reaching for her clay pouches, abruptly freezing when she realized that they weren't there. Deidara forced herself to relax, to calm her racing heart and loosen her grip on the scroll a little. Nothing's wrong, she told herself. There was no one here to kill her, no monsters here to tear out her viscera. Everything was fine.
Deidara took a step back, nearly biting her tongue when she walked straight into someone. A yelp sounded, and a female shout. She whipped around, meeting dark brown eyes that were widened in surprise. As if time had slowed down, Deidara reached out to grab her and make her upright again. She missed by inches, and the woman she had bumped into fell onto the path.
Before either of them could even say anything, the air was suddenly filled with barking, and a large dog with a grey pelt and creamy white underbelly stood protectively in front of the brown-haired woman. Deidara grimaced.
"Genmaru, down! Down!" The dog stared threateningly at Deidara for a few moments longer before backing away, whining.
"Sorry," Deidara reached out an arm, "I didn't see you there, hm."
Inuzuka Hana stared at the hand she was offered. Then, hesitantly, she took it, Genmaru watching their every move to make sure that the blonde wouldn't hurt his master. "Thank you," she said hoarsely.
Deidara tilted her head. "I remember you. You were the waitress at the ramen place."
Hana chuckled dryly as she patted down the front of her worn shirt and pants. "Not anymore. I was fired," she elaborated when Deidara looked at her confusedly.
"Your face is bruised, too," Deidara said bluntly, examining the hand-shaped mark on her cheek. And are those tattoos a clan sign? They seemed like such, and she wondered why a noblewoman would have been working such a dirty, common job. She'd been abused as well, clearly.
"Ah…!" Embarrassed, the Inuzuka woman waved her hand dismissively. "It's nothing, I was just clumsy. I should go now, if I want to have a place to sleep. Goodnight, Deidara." She started to walk off, her dog loyally padding after her.
How—? "Wait! How did you—?"
"I heard someone say it in the restaurant," Hana said over her shoulder.
"Then what's your name, hm?"
Deidara couldn't see it whatever expression the woman's face wore, but she could see the lines of her body tense up underneath the moonlight. She narrowed her eyes, crossing her arms. In the cold, her leg began to ache, but she was barely aware of it.
"Hana." The name was nearly lost in the wind. "Just Hana."
Deidara watched her leave, watched her disappear around the corner. Then she frowned and exhaled, a wispy white cloud escaping from her lips. It's getting late. I should go home.
The dirt crunched beneath her boots.
Hey, Danna. I got a job today, you know. Shikamaru and Choji pulled some strings. When I have money, I should buy them a present for helping me.
She glanced up at the moon one last time.
What did you do today, hm?
A/N: Gee willikers, it's been a while. As you can see, we see defeated!Hana in this chapter...