I don't really have much to say, so, enjoy the chapter. (Oh, but I guess I should clarify: They are living in Japan, the characters besides those who are specified are Japanese born.) Enjoy chapter 6 of 'Deserving?' titled 'Disaster'

'Love'

The word plagued Monika's mind, like an annoyingly catchy song that refused to exit your mind despite how much you try to shove it out. Or like the drunken party boy who gets overly inebriated at every event, and refuses to leave despite no one wanting him there.

"No..." She muttered to herself, shaking her head, "I'm not in love," She stated defiantly. "I am not some fool who falls in love so soon..." She put her hands in her face and groaned, wanting to scream as loud as she possibly could.

"It's just a crush... Yeah... It'll go away and I'll forget those feelings even existed, just an everyday crush..." She laughed slightly, "On a girl..." That was the other thing, she had never once been attracted to a female before. She had never given thought to her sexuality, she had just naturally assumed she was straight and only preferred men. But, that of course conflicts with her current feelings.

Why did things always have to be so complicated? Why couldn't life be simple and easy? She just wanted to live life happily, have parents who treated her well, have nice friends, have hobbies that she enjoyed, and none of the other complicated stuff that took years off of her life. But, that isn't how life goes, is it?

"I have more... Important things to think about..." She shook her head and tried her best to push the thoughts of Sayori into the back of her mind, and her thoughts now went to the confusion that is her heart, to the disdain that was her home life.

She did her best to enjoy the rest of the walk in the semi-cold weather, but of course, like everything good in life, it ended too soon. Her vision was overtaken by her large house. She sighed, and made her way to the front gate. As she reached for the gate, her hand stopped.

The light in the kitchen and living room were on.

Her parents would never leave the house with the lights on like that, the few times Monika did it, and even Minori, they scolded them harshly, even on one occasion grounding the two for leaving the house with all the midfloor lights on.

She retracted her hand, and shakily made her way to the two door garage, and she opened the gray keypad and punched in the code, the white steel doors opening up, and as they slid up, her blood ran cold, and shivers slithered down her spine.

Her parents cars were there, sitting perfectly still in the cold garage. She stepped back and let the garage doors fall.

They weren't ever home this early... Why were they here so early? Monika felt as if there was a 10000 kilogram weight on her back as she stared at her once welcoming home, which now looked foreboding, and terrifying.

She wondered if she should sprint away, and just let her problems disappear. But, she knew that was an awful idea, and in all reality she had no place to go if she did choose to. Well... She could always go to Sayori's, but, the idea of spending time with her after her discovery of her feelings felt like an even poorer decision.

Monika slowly walked to her front gate, and opened it. Closing it behind her, she made the slow walk to her door, each step landed with a dull thud, as if it were weighed down with a million kilos. She made it to the door, and looked down on the porch. Her parents shoes sat there perfectly straight against the house, confirming that her parents were here, as if there was a chance they were gone.

She slipped her shoes off and placed them next to her parents, and breathed deeply, reaching a shaky hand towards the knob and slowly turning it, opening the door and walking inside.

The air in the house was tense, it felt like a dark cloud, whirling around with disappointment and disdain. She felt like vomiting as she closed the door behind her. She shrugged her bag off of her shoulders, and the moment her bag hit the ground, she heard the thing she wished she didn't.

"Monika, get in here. Now." Her father said in a stern, deep voice.

She walked into the kitchen, her eyes glued onto the floor, refusing to look her parents in the eyes.

"Monika." Her father said once more, "Monika, you will look at me while I talk to you."

Monika begrudgingly looked up, and much to her expectations, saw both of her parents sitting there, looking at her with nothing but disappointment laced in their eyes.

"Take a seat," Her mother said, but Monika shook her head quietly.

"I-I'll stand... Please..." She croaked, barely audible to her parents.

They nodded and Monika felt her shoulders relax, albeit slightly.

"Monika, what in the world were you thinking?" Her father asked after a few moments of silence, "First, you don't do any of the chores you were supposed to yesterday, you didn't even seem to read the note we left you. Then, you leave the house hours before you are supposed to, without telling anyone no less, then you say something that vulgar and spiteful to your mother? Even through text, that behavior is utterly unacceptable," Her father scolded harshly.

She stood there, clutching her left hand in her right, shaking ever so slightly. She was scared, she didn't know why, she knew her father would never lay a finger on her, but... It was just the feeling of being in the sight of two people who she knew wanted nothing to do with her, and the pit in her stomach that gave her.

"Do you know how appalled I was, Monika? To have my daughter send me something so vile in my place of work no less? Your sister-"

Monika felt something snap as soon as her mother mentioned her sister. Her hands fell to her side, clenching her fists so tight her knuckles became a pale white. She was over it, she was at her breaking point.

"Will you..." She cut her mother off, "Shut. The. Hell. Up. For ONE second, and reflect on what you say to me? And that maybe instead of being appalled over the way I said something, actually think about WHY I said it?" She snapped at her mother, who looked thoroughly taken aback by her previously timid daughter.

"Monika! How dare you spe-"

"No dad, how dare YOU let her speak to me like I'm trash? How dare you speak to me like I'm trash?" She spat, "God, I would think Minori is a deity with the amount of worship you give her, as if she was the messiah. And who am I? The lowly disciple who was just a fucking failure," That marked the first time she had ever cursed in front of her parents, and by the looks on their faces, you could tell.

"Oh gods how you just go on and on about how amazing she is. It's almost like you don't have another daughter, if no one asked they probably would never know! Since I do nothing of note and am just a failure, of course, OF COURSE, you wouldn't want to mention me! Don't want to sully that good name, huh? Not like you would have anything to boast about, considering you know NOTHING about me!" She let the years of pent up aggression and sadness pour out of her, the hours of crying feeling as if she wasn't good enough, the suicidal thoughts...

"You never, ever compliment me for anything. I never get a "I'm proud of you Monika!" or even a damn "Good job!" No, I get "You should do better," and "I'm disappointed." But, I would bet you tell Minori how proud you are of her over the phone at least twice a week, over the most arbitrary of achievements. Hell, you probably talk to her more than you talk to me, and she doesn't even live with here anymore! I am so done with this stupid crap, I am so done with you telling me how shit I am, telling me how I should live MY life, telling me who I should be, then getting butt hurt when I call you out on it," She felt tears welling in the corners of her eyes, she knew she should stop, but she couldn't.

"Do you even know anything about me? Do you?" She shook her head, "Hmm? Name one of my friends. Name one, go ahead, try," She egged them on, and she could tell by the exchanging glances they had nothing, "Oh! What a surprise! But, I bet you can name every new friend Minori has made at Uni, can't you?"

The stayed silent, "Tch, of course. Tell me, what do I do in my free time? What are my hobbies? What's my favorite school subject? What's my favorite color? Half the time I'm convinced you don't even remember my birthday!" She yelled.

They only looked away. "Can't even look at me, can you? I bet you just wish I left, and never came back. Just so you could pretend that you only have one daughter who is this amazing godly person, instead of having two daughters, and one of them being some failure, being some utter stain to the family name that you don't care about," She felt tears streaming down her face, "You know who I had to go to when I was feeling depressed? Or when I had a falling out with a friend? Or was stressed out because of school or school drama? Or when my damn cat died? If the guess is no one, then you are spot on! I have had no one to rely on, no one to talk to, no one to comfort me, not that I didn't want someone, it's just my parents couldn't care less about their daughters suffering unless it involves your fragile self-image." She shook her head, "And if I even dare attempted to come to you, I was scolded for being too soft..." She seethed, her eyes laced with anger.

"Is it so hard? Is it really that much of a strain on your pride that you can't bare to ask me the simplest of questions, to at least PRETEND to be interested in my life? In my interest? Half the time I feel like I'm just a squatter and you guys don't even know I'm here, just living in a house with two people who could care less about your existence, and only cares if your existence makes them look bad."

"Do you know where I am after school, do you?" She asked her voice still filled with venom, expecting the wrong answer.

After a moment of silence, her mother spoke up, "You... Are the president of the debate club... Right?"

"You know, I am surprised that you even remembered that. But no, I dropped the debate club and I'm now running a literature club. But you never asked me what I do at school, so of course you wouldn't know that," She shook her head, her face wet with tears. "I don't even know how many times I've been hurt because you had better things to worry about than your daughter," She turned around, refusing to look at them.

"Is this your whole plan, perhaps? Push me aside, make me feel so much inner pain I can't handle it anymore? Maybe so I'll just end up offing myself, so you could come up with an excuse as to why I am such a failure, because I have some secret mental disorder that you chose to keep from everyone and 'did the best you can' but nothing could help? At least that would give you a damn reason for treating me like this..." She sobbed, knowing full well she was going way too far, that she was saying things that could cause major damage with her parents. But... She didn't care anymore.

"Monika..." Her mother said softly.

"No! Leave me alone! You are already amazing at that, why can't you do it now?" She started for the stairs, but stopped, "You know what the worst part is? I am going through one of the most confusing times of my life, and I can't even trust you enough to confide in you..." She whimpered, tears streaming down her face as she ran up the stairs, wiping them away with her sleeve. She made it to her rooms floor and rushed towards her door.

Suddenly, she smashed into something and fell back on her behind, hearing a loud yelp as she reached for her head, "What the hell...?"

She looked in front of her, and much to her surprise, she saw a girl, around her age, with light blonde hair and dark brown eyes, dressed in full black, with a long sleeve button up shirt with a collar and a skirt that went to her knees. That was the outfit our maids are supposed to wear...

The girl frantically looked up at Monika, and quickly went to her bag that was hanging on her shoulder, digging through it. "Who are you?" Monika asked, looking the girl up and down.

The girl stopped and looked up, her face a red mess. "Uh... Fish bubble!" She said randomly, out of the blue in a strange accent...

"What...?" Monika cocked her head to the side in confusion. Was this girl mentally unstable?

The girl searched through her bag once more, and proceeded to grab a small book, which only strengthened Monika's suspicions.

She was about to reach for her phone and call the police, but, before she did, she got a good look at the front cover of the book and it's title, "English to Japanese dictionary: A simple guide to common Japanese phrases and words." it read in English, and everything clicked for Monika.

"I..." The girl said slowly, squinting at the page, "Am... Sorry..." She said and looked up at Monika expectantly, her large dark eyes staring at her.

Monika, despite the fact she just had the biggest argument in her life, potentially ruined the weak relationship with her parents, and was feeling utterly dreadful, let out a small giggle.

"I speak English, you know," She said in English, which made the girls shoulders relax, and a sigh coming from her as she hung her head.

"Thank goodness..." She mumbled, this time in a clear American accent, putting the dictionary away in her bag, "I thought I was doomed... Ahaha..."

Monika giggled again and stood up, walking over to her and helping her up, "I have been taught English since I was six, I'm pretty much fluent in the language," Monika said and crossed her arms, glad that this girl wasn't some psychopath who broke into her home. She hoped...

"Ah! I heard that a lot of Asian children are taught English, but I didn't know if it was true or not," She said and rubbed the back of her head, laughing slightly.

Monika nodded and looked her up and down, "Now, I would prefer if you explained to me why there is an American girl on the second floor of my house," She said and the girl looked at Monika confused.

"Huh...? Did... Did your parents not tell you?" She cocked her head to the side, "I'm the new maid, your parents posted something online that they needed a new one, and I got the job. Weird that they didn't tell you..."

Monika rolled her eyes, "I'm not surprised. They would have kept me in the dark until I saw you after I came home from school and called the police," she rubbed the back of her head, scowling at the thought of her parents. "Well, I guess that explains the outfit," She said and smiled, extending her hand out to the girl, "My name is Nishimura Monika, may I know yours?"

"Oh!" She quickly took Monika's hand and shook it, "I am Katelyn! It is a pleasure to meet you, Monika!" She said in a delightful tone.

"Pleasure to meet you as well, Katelyn," She said and looked her up and down, "You don't look much older than me, how is it an American girl like yourself who knows next to no Japanese is in, well, Japan?" She questioned, curiously.

"Oh, I was accepted into Uni here, and I'm starting in a few months. I decided to come here before school started so I could get accustomed to the way of life and stuff, and y'know... Learn Japanese," She laughed and rubbed the back of her head. She seemed to have a habit of doing that...

"Well, Japanese isn't exactly easy to learn in a few months but... I have faith in you..." Monika said half heartedly. She was really not feeling conversation right now, and this just felt like it was dragging on...

"Awe! Thank you! Well, I don't want to bother you anymore, and I have work to do. Farewell!" She said and waved as she went to the flight of stairs that led to the third floor.

"Thank... God..." She muttered, and went to her room. The new maid, Katelyn... She wasn't awful, maybe a bit odd, but, she isn't from this country so it's to be expected that she act strange in Monika's eyes. Hopefully she didn't notice her traces of crying... But she looked like she was too worried about knowing Japanese than Monika. Anyway, she seems to be better than the last one, Suzutsuki, who was and old bat who was nothing but rude. Not to mention she was stealing from them the entire time...

She grunted and opened her door, slamming it behind her as she flopped on her bed, and the wave of pain and sadness that was being held back was poured onto her as her eyes filled once more with tears, and sobs escaped from her lips as she cried into her pillow, letting it all out as she laid there.

She thought of how her parents treated her, she thought of her sister, she thought of how hostile she was to her parents, and despite not being the best to her, how they didn't deserve that.

She thought of Sayori and her confusing feelings that she didn't understand, and how they plagued her, despite her only figuring them out no more than an hour and a half ago.

After what felt like forever, her tears slowly began to abate, and she wiped them away, looking to the window, seeing the sun was starting to set. She sighed and rubbed her temple. She didn't want to go downstairs to eat, she didn't want to see her parents right now. And, seeing as they didn't come up to check on her, she was certain they weren't fond of the idea anyways.

She needed to do something, though. She was starving, she didn't eat lunch in class, she didn't have the mental power to work and eat at the same time...

"Work... Oh gosh dang it..." She muttered, remembering her paper she needed to turn in by tonight. She was definitely not in a mental state to work on homework...

Then, an idea hit her. "Maybe..." She felt her heart pounding in her chest as she picked up her phone with a shaky hand. She didn't know if she had the strength to after the walk home but...

She slowly opened her contacts and scrolled through until she landed on the name she was looking for, "Tanaka Sayori..." She mumbled the name and clicked on the name, her phone indicating she was calling her.

She put the phone to her ear and gulped, waiting...

She heard a static noise, and for a moment, silence. The only noise being the sound of her heart pounding in her chest.

Then... "Monika?"

And her sadness flooded away.

Hope you guys enjoyed the chapter! Please, review or DM me if you have any thoughts or concerns! Love you!