Wow, I'm still alive? It's hard to believe, but yeah, I am. If you were wondering where in the world I was, and how I went from consistent updates to going M.I.A. for two months? Well, long story short, depression can go pound sand. But! I got a new AD script, and that gave me motivation to write again. So, hopefully I will finish this story within the month! Now that my rambling is over, enjoy!
"... Monika? What's up?" Sayori asked, her high pitched voice soothing the stressed out brunette more than she could rightfully explain. God, she was a helpless lesbian, wasn't she?
"Hi! Sayori!" Monika said, doing her best to mask her sadness. Her face was still wet with tears, her eyes puffy, but she couldn't help but smile as she heard the ever so relaxing voice of her crush. Was it too early to call her a crush? "I erm... Would you think it would be... Um... Okay if I... Came over tonight? Maybe stay the night..." She trailed off, biting the inside of her cheek.
Sayori was quiet for a moment, which worried the already broken down brunette. She really hoped that she would say yes...
"Um... Wow, I wasn't expecting that, ehehe... Erm... Well, I would love that," Monika quietly pumped her fist in the air, "But, I don't know if my parents would be on board with that, I'll have to ask. Maybe it would help to convince them if you gave me a reason?"
Monika's demeanor changed from victorious to defeated as her shoulders slumped over. Should she tell her the real reason? Is she even comfortable enough to tell her something that heavy?
"Um... I just need a place to work on homework..." She mumbled, making it clear that that wasn't the truth.
"Oh! That should probably convince them, yeah!" The cheery coral haired girl exclaimed, seemingly none the wiser of Monika's obvious lies.
"Oh, that's... Nice. I'll be over in about half an hour, if that's cool? And if it is too much of an inconvenience, I won't intrude on your dinner and eat with you guys," She said, standing up and grabbing a small bag. She knew Sayori wasn't poor, but she knew her parents weren't rolling in money.
"Oh don't be silly! If they won't feed you, I will give you some of mine. You aren't gonna come here and go hungry. What kind of monster do you think I am?" Monika laughed in response, shaking her head as she put the bag on her bed.
"Oh, just the scariest monster known to man. You'd give Godzilla a run for his money," She teased, undressing and tossing her dirtied uniform into the laundry bin. She went back to her closet and grabbed her other uniform, putting it in the bag.
"Raaaaaawrr! Fear me! I am the Demon Queen of Debauchery! I will conquer the world!" Sayori exclaimed, both brutally mispronouncing "Debauchery" and using it without knowing what it means in the slightest.
She grabbed a blue blouse and a pair of black jeans, stuffing herself in them, holding her phone to her ear with her shoulder, "I have no doubts in you, your evilness. But, perhaps you should wait on the whole conquering the world thing for now, at least until you can solve algebra equations," She enjoyed the innocent teasing, smiling as she threw the blouse over her head.
"Fine... Meanie..." She sighed, "Well, I guess I'll see ya when you get here!" She exclaimed, which put a smile on Monika's face.
"I can't wait," She hung up and stared at her phone screen. "The effect this girl has on me isn't healthy... But I can't complain..." She whispered to herself, putting her binder into the bag along with her brush and makeup kit/self care kit and zipped it up.
Okay, step two. Sneaking out. Shouldn't be that hard, right? Her parents were probably in their room talking about how they should kick her out or something along those lines. She quite frankly didn't care.
The rebellious brunette left her room, softly closing the door behind her as she creeped downstairs. She peeked down at the bottom floor, making sure the coast was clear. From what she could see, the bottom floor was empty. She tip-toed down the remaining stairs and quietly made her way to the door. She ever so slowly turned the knob and opened the large door.
'Freedom! At last!' She thought in her head as she closed the door gently, putting her shoes on and rushing out of the yard, not bothering to close the gate on the way out.
She sighed, breathing in the cool air. The sun was already beginning to set, being fall and all, and it was growing colder and colder as the seconds ticked by slowly. She scratched her neck and closed her eyes, cracking her neck by moving it left and right.
Walking in silence, she soon made it to the home she had already been to twice before today, hopping onto the porch and rasping her cold, pale knuckles on the white door. She waited for a moment, hearing some shuffling behind the door.
Soon, it was opened, and standing in front of her was a tall man with glasses and salt and pepper hair. He was a solid 20 centimeters taller than Monika, and he was rather well built. Not a muscle head, but for someone who was an accountant he was buff. "Ah, you must be Monika? Sayori has spoken about you quite positively," She smiled, and Monika bowed.
"Thank you for allowing me into your home, Mr. Takahashi," She said and stood up, taking her shoes off and putting them next to the three pairs that were already near the door.
Sayori's father moved out of the doorway and allowed Monika to enter, which she happily did as her fingers were about to freeze off. She stepped into the warm home, Sayori's father closing the door behind them. "Please, make yourself at home. Sayori is up in her room, I'll go get he-"
"MONIKA! YOU'RE HERE!" Sayori exclaimed, cutting off her father and rushing down the stairs, rushing at the taller girl and jumping on her, wrapping her arms around her shoulders, her legs in the air forcing Monika to hold her up by her hips.
"Woah! Yes, I'm here Sayori," She giggled and let the girl down to her feet. "Dummy... You could have knocked me over, what were you thinking?" She asked sweetly, ruffling her already messy hair.
"I'm sorry, Monika. I just missed you so much!" Sayori clapped her hands together, a huge smile plastered on her face. A smile that made Monika's chest feel so warm.
"You saw me literally two hours ago... Silly girl," She shook her head, and sat down. She looked around the living room, her eyes scanning the small room. It was nice, and cozy. Much smaller than her own, but it had a lot more charm to it. And it smelled like Sayori...
She noticed that her dad had seemingly disappeared, which kinda creeped Monika out that such a large human can sneak out of a room without making a sound. "So!" Sayori said, plopping herself down next to her, "Like I thought, mommy is going to make food for you too. She is in the kitchen making food right now. Daddy is probably helping her," She hummed, patting her thighs with her hands and swaying side to side.
"A homecooked meal...?" She almost laughed at the thought. "I can't remember the last time my mother made food, let alone my father. We either get something from a store, or someone cooks it for us when we have a chef in. It's good food, but it isn't homecooked food with that special charm..." She sighed, her shoulders slumping. She can't seem to get off the topic of her parents, huh?
"Oh, yeah... You did mention that they weren't home a lot. Must suck... I'm sorry Monika," Sayori patted her back, and Monika glanced at her from the side, and scoffed.
"At this point," She whispered, "I don't think I would give a damn if they left and never came back," She seethed under her breath, as to make sure her voice didn't carry to the kitchen.
"Monika!" Sayori whisper-yelled, "Don't say things like that!" She frowned, "You only get one set of parents you know..." She looked away. "Not everyone has them anymore..." She trailed off, and Monika raised her eyebrow. That was weird, Sayori never got like that before. Sure, she got serious before, but Monika couldn't remember a time when she was so somber and defensive.
"Er... Yeah, you're right. Sorry, I shouldn't say things like that, I'm sorry," She put her hands on top of her head and closed her eyes.
Sayori just sat there quietly, rubbing her feet together idly as a blanket of silence covered the room.
"So... What's your mother making?" Monika asked, getting a little uncomfortable with how quiet the room had gotten.
"Oh uh... Miso... It's her favorite, and mine too if I am being honest. I had it a lot growing up, and I know that people always say that if you eat something a bunch of times, you end up hating it and whatever. I've always loved Miso, and I don't think I would dislike it if I eat it a billion times!" She smiled, which lightened the mood in the room.
"Oh that's yummy! And I agree, Miso is amazing. But maybe I would get slightly sick of it after a billion servings..." Monika laughed, which got her a poke in the side.
Sayori rolled her eyes, "Your loss," She sighed and leaned back on the couch, the room reverting back to it's original silence. Monika wasn't happy with it, but it felt like a more comfortable silence than it was earlier.
Suddenly, she heard shifting to the next to her, and soon there after felt Sayori's head on her shoulder, looking forward, not daring to say a word. Monika felt her chest contract as her heartrate started to gradually go up.
Okay she just figured out she was gay a couple hours ago, cut her a break for not knowing what to do okay?
She just held her tongue, and let the coral haired girl lean on her, her soft breaths being the only sound audible in the small, silent room.
After a few moments, the door opened that lead to the kitchen and a black haired lady peaked out of it, "Dinner is ready on the table, girls," The woman who was presumably Sayori's mom said in a soft voice. She was about as tall as Monika, with brown eyes and slightly wrinkled skin. She seemed more account-like than her husband, that's for sure...
"Okay, thank you Ms. Takahashi," Monika nodded, and lightly shook Sayori's leg, "C'mon, let's go get some food, okay?" She said and Sayori looked up at her with tired eyes, but a bright smile despite them.
"Sounds like a plan Stan!" She exclaimed, getting off of her and standing up, stretching her arms. Monika soon followed suit, following the girl as she walked through the door to the kitchen. She looked around the kitchen as they passed, admiring how tidy it was despite it's smaller size. She wanted a house like this in the future, not one like she lived in now. Living in a big house sounds nice, until you're alone 90% of the time and it's cold and lonely...
The brunette followed her through another door which led to a dining room. The walls were a dark yellow, except for one which was white, which made Monika think that it was an extension, or just a really poor design choice.
In front of her, there was a circle table in the middle of the room, with a candle set in the middle and a lamp above it, the light set very dim. There were a few decorations around, with a cabinet with fine china being the staple of the room. Some of the set was missing, which guided her eyes to the bowls that sat on the table, which matched the set in the cabinet.
The table was covered with a crimson colored tablecloth, four chairs sat around it and four bowls sat in front of them, with a spoon next to them. Two of the bowls had wine glasses filled with wine, while the other two had wine glasses as well, but Monika could tell it was grape juice inside.
In all honesty, she was surprised. She didn't think people that weren't stuck up asshats ate like this. She was expecting something far less formal than a candle lit dinner with wine and fine china.
"Ah, please have a seat Monika darling," Sayori's mom said, gesturing to one of the seats. Monika nodded and sat down, Sayori following suite, sitting in the seat to the left of her.
She scrunched her nose up slightly, glancing at the wine glass that sat next to the bowl to the right of her, which was Sayori's father's. She didn't particularly enjoy the smell of wine, nor the taste. It wasn't retched, and depending on the type it was enjoyable. But... From the scent she could tell it was cheap wine, and she didn't want to imagine how it tasted.
The soup though, looked and smelled absolutely delicious. She hadn't had Miso in a long time, and the last time she had it homemade? She couldn't remember. She picked up her spoon, but noticed that everyone at the table had their heads down, their eyes closed.
Monika cocked her head to the side, and raised a brow, being confused for a moment before it clicked; they were praying.
Okay yeah now Monika was uncomfortable.
She put the spoon down gently and lowered her head glancing side to side, waiting for someone to say something to break the silence. It may have been nice for them, but the silence was extremely awkward for her. She had never done this before, not to mention with a group of people...
"... And in the name of the son, the father, and the holy spirit..." Sayori's father suddenly said in a quiet voice, making Monika jump a little.
"Amen." Sayori and her mother said together, Monika trying her best to recover and say amen directly after them. Hoping they didn't notice that she didn't partake in any of what just happened, she picked up her spoon as Sayori did, her mother saying, "Let's enjoy the food now."
Now that one of the most awkward moments of her life passed, she proceeded to enjoy her food. Which... Was absolutely amazing. She was hoping she didn't look like a hog as she ate, quickly scooping it into her bowl and into her mouth as elegantly as she could. She stopped every few minutes to drink from her glass.
The family plus Monika ate in silence, the only sounds being the clicking of the metal spoon against the fine glass. She couldn't help but look around at everyone while they ate. Sayori was acting surprisingly... Well, she was eating like a human and not a vacuum cleaner. As she looked away, she couldn't help but notice that they always held their glasses wrong. Instead of by the base of the neck, they held the bottom of the cup or the top of the neck. She figured if they ate like this all the time, they would know that.
Or maybe her parents pretentiousness is rubbing off on her, and she is looking too deep into small errors like they are cardinal sins. She hated herself so much...
Soon, they all finished their meals and their drinks, and Monika stood up along with Sayori. "Don't you girls worry about the dishes, we'll handle them. You go up to Sayori's room and get your work done, okay?" Sayori's mom said kindly receiving a nod and a smile from the brunette.
"Thank you, Ms. Takahashi. The meal was delightful and your hospitality even more so, I am in your debt," Monika said politely, bowing. She followed Sayori out of the dining room, and followed her up the stairs to a door with a paper taped to it that said "Smile! Today is another day!" in hardly legible purple crayon.
Monika thought it was cute, and she giggled a bit as Sayori opened the door, "Hey, what's so funny?" Sayori pouted, and Monika playfully poked her side.
"You~" She said and slipped past her into her room. She looked around, and sighed. The floor was a mess of dirty clothes and stuffed animals that fell from the pile next to her unmade bed which was next to her nightstand with three half filled bottles of water.
"S-Sorry about the mess... I didn't think anyone was going to see it, you know?" She laughed sheepishly, turning her head away, her cheeks tinted red.
"Ah, don't worry about it. It just screams you, you know?" She teased, sitting on her bed.
"H-Hey! That's not very nice..." She sat down next to her, and Monika ruffled her already messy hair.
"It is though, because even though this room is messy, it has a charm and a feeling of warmth that you can't get anywhere else! So, just like you!" She smiled, which got an even brighter blush from the red head.
"T-That's... You're... Natsuki's right, you are a dummy..." Sayori said in a quiet voice, a smile on her face.
"Using Natsuki as inspiration now, are we? That's an all-time new low for you, don't you start going around all moody all the time. I'll have to knock some sense into you!"
"Uh-huh, sure. And how are you going to do that? You wouldn't hurt a fly!" Sayori shot back, sticking her tongue out at her.
"Your funeral," She said and quickly grabbed a small white teddy bear and proceeded to lightly hit her on the head with it.
"H-Hey! Stop using Mr. Snickles as a weapon!" She covered her head with her arms. "I'll save you from the evil witch Mr. Snickles!" Sayori exclaimed, moving away from Monika and grabbing her arm with both of hers, pulling on her arm.
"S-Sayori, if you keep pulling we are going t-" She was cut off as she felt herself get tugged off of the bed, falling onto her back. And a split second later, a small red head fell on top of her, her butt landing on Monika's stomach. "Fall..."
"Monika! Are you okay?" Sayori looked down, but Monika was just smiling like a fool. She poked her back and shook her head.
"Tsk tsk, you are such a goober Yo-Yo... But a brave one, you seemed to have freed Mr. Snickles from my grasps," She said and pointed to the white bear which laid on a red tank-top.
"Yay! Justice for Mr. Snickles!" She giggled and got off of Monika, helping her back up to her bed. "Hehe... That was fun, but you should really get started on that homework before it gets late, you know?"
Monika blinked for a moment, before remembering that the excuse she made to come here was because she needed a place to work... Yeah she had no willpower to do anything besides play with and talk to Sayori. That, or crying/sleeping.
"Can I be honest for a sec?" She said, her face a little red from the fall she just had, "You know how I said I needed a place to do homework? Yeah, that was a lie... I just um... Wanted to come see you, y'know?" She said quietly. Okay, that wasn't a total lie, she did want to see her regardless of her parents being jerks.
Although she didn't like the weird feelings in her stomach she's had the whole time she has been here.
"Monika..." She glared at her and shook her head, "... You should have told me that, I would have liked to know that I was lying to my parents..." She looked to the side. "... But... I guess I should confess something too..."
Monika raised a brow. What in the world did she have to confess to? It's not like she's said much of anything since she got there...
"My um... Parents know who your dad is, and they know that you have a lot of money and stuff... So um... When I told them your name, they got all nervous and they made sure to set up the table really nice and stuff... You know, that was the first time my mother used that china since her mother died? They really wanted to impress you. I think they are hoping that you'd say something nice about them and your dad would help them get their own accounting firm they've dreamed of... I'm sorry Monika..." She said quietly, and Monika sighed.
Even when she runs away from them, her parents shadow always loomed over her. "... Don't worry about it. Everyone does that. Your parents are in a long line of people who are just waiting to impress my father. Too bad for them my dad doesn't have a soul, and doesn't care for anyone but his family name," She rolled her eyes, and laid back on the bed.
"I'm still sorry Monika..." She laid next to her, and Monika smiled. She leaned closer and stuck her tongue out, lightly licking the tip of her nose.
Sayori blinked twice, confused and trying to process what happened in her head. She quickly turned red and she looked away, "You're so gross..." She mumbled, and Monika couldn't help but laugh.
"What can I say? You have a very lickable nose," She poked her back a few times, laying behind her, softly humming.
"Hey... Monika um... I noticed at dinner that... Well... I noticed you weren't exactly comfortable with praying and... I'm sorry, we shouldn't have put you in that position..." She apologized quietly.
Damn it, so they did notice. "I-I um... It's fine, Sayori. My parents never taught me any sort of religion. My grandparents were Shintoist, but my parents didn't seem to care to teach me anything about it. So, I've grown rather cynical to it... And well, I've never seen Christian-style praying before, so I was kinda freaked out to be honest." She sighed, "I don't really know if I believe in a god Sayori..."
Sayori turned over, and shrugged, "You know, I don't think I do either. No, wait, I do believe there is a god. I just... Think that he gave up on us a long time ago." Monika frowned, and put a hand on Sayori's side.
"Are you okay? You've been really quiet and somber ever since I've been here... And that... Doesn't sound like something you would say... At all..." Monika asked, concerned as she stared into the sea blue eyes that were a mere centimeters away.
"Oh uh... It's nothing, don't worry about it. I just... Was really happy all day today, guess it drained out all my happy juice!" She exclaimed half-heartedly, making Monika even more concerned than before.
"Alright..." She said warily, eyeing her for a moment. "Then maybe we should get to bed? I know it's only 8:30 but I woke up super early today and I am pretty tired..." She laughed slightly.
Sayori nodded, "Yeah, I'm pretty tired too..." She hopped up off the bed and went to her closet, picking a pair of pajamas. "Oh, will you need something? I have a kimono, but it may be a little small... But it would probably be more comfortable than jeans..."
Monika was so distressed she completely missed packing anything to sleep in. Or a pillow and blanket for that matter. Hopefully they had something she could use... "Oh, yes, please and thank you!" She stood up, and cracked her back.
Sayori dug through her closet more and pulled out a white kimono, and tossed it over to Monika. "Okay, I'll be in the bathroom. I need to brush my teeth, so I'll just get dressed in here. Don't burn my room down while I'm gone!" She skipped out of the room, leaving the door cracked open.
Monika sighed, and unbuttoned her jeans. Today... Has mostly sucked. But, all the time she got to spend with Sayori today, walking her to school... Hanging out with her at the club... Walking her home... Eating dinner and staying the night at her home... It was all too much for the poor brunette. She was still so confused about her feelings, but every single part of her wanted nothing more than to make this girl happy and feel loved.
And she didn't mind that want.
She got dressed and folded her clothes, putting them on Sayori's desk next to her computer. She looked around the room, wondering what she should do while Sayori was in the bathroom.
She could just sit down on her bed and wait patiently...
Or she could sift through other peoples belongings.
She thought for a moment...
Sift through other peoples belongings it is.
The brunette decided the closet would be a good place, and she looked through the clothes that were hanged up. They were all... Really Sayori. They were mostly one size too big, and had weird but cute little designs on them of trees or vines.
She looked down at the bottom, noticing a few boxes lying on the ground, she curiously crouched down and opened one up, taking a look inside. There wasn't much stuff that was interesting, a few children's books, baby and toddler clothes, small shoes, some toys... It made Monika smile like a buffoon, imagining a tiny Sayori wearing these cute little clothes...
Gods she was gay.
She closed the box and was about to stand up, but she noticed a few of the baby clothes were in a pile behind the box. She just figured that they fell out awhile back, and that Sayori was too lazy to put them back into the box. "I have a crush on the laziest person on the planet, don't I?" She grumbled to herself, picking the clothes up with the intention of moving them to the box.
But to the box, they never went.
Instead, they fell to the floor as Monika stared at what once laid hidden beneath the small articles of clothing.
A brown, tattered rope sat there, tied neatly into a hangman's knot.
It was a noose.
Sayori had a noose in her closet.
Monika was beyond shocked. Her eyes were wide, and her mouth slightly parted as she looked at the knot that had killed so many people before. She leaned down, and picked it up with shaky hands.
It was tied tight, and Monika gulped. It may have been the hysteria in her mind, but it looked like it would fit right on Sayori's small neck...
She wanted to vomit, she wanted throw this evil thing away and pretend she had never seen it.
She was so entranced by the rope, she didn't hear the door open.
"Okay Monika! I'm re-" Sayori stopped in her tracks as she saw the emerald eyed beauty standing there with the noose she had hidden in her closet.
A sad smile reached her lips, and she sighed, "Well... I guess I need to learn to hide things better..." She said, her tone dark as they both stared at the crude knot in silence.
Hi! I hope you enjoyed! This chapter was a little crappy in my opinion, but that is for you to decide. Please, leave a comment with any thoughts or suggestions! Have a lovely evening, and happy holidays.