Author's Note: Okay so this one-shot was inspired by Yagami Yato's My Hero Academia ASMR videos on YouTube, taking place somewhere between Part 13 and "True Love's Kiss" of Deku's episodes. The universe she built around what started out as improv Character x Listener videos has created such a following and expanded universe that I couldn't help but be enamored by her story-telling. Go check her out! She's an amazing voice actor, and she builds really compelling stories and characters from an already amazing anime series.
Also, would like to point out that my OC, Alyssa Blake, for this story is dealing with a slight AU versus my "Muse" canon (my other story, if you want to check it out). This version, Alyssa went to UA in General Studies as an exchange student and is Quirkless, the latter which the Yagami Yato videos suggested the listener was. I'm just applying her character traits over the SI listener, which I hope gives her more personality than the self-insert lol.
Late Night Muse
When I was shaken awake by feelings of sorrow and cold dread, I half-expected to hear the sounds of distant machinery. Instead, I was greeted by the sounds of wildlife and the hum of space heaters. It was jarring, to say the least. The warehouse we had been staying in up until now had no windows and was fortified like a military bunker thanks to all the additions and modifications by our benefactor and leader, Tomura Shigaraki. It was by all definitions a safe house, but being that most of our motley crew never left it outside of special missions, it often felt more like a cage. The isolation didn't bother me much, having lived a quiet, introverted lifestyle most of my life that could be quelled by drawing books and internet access, but the same couldn't be said for the man sleeping soundly next to me.
Even while asleep, I could tell the isolation and stress over the past year had taken a toll on him. He hardly ever slept, and when he did, he was often plagued by nightmares. You could see it on his face, the bags under his eyes, the furrowing of his brow and soft distress that crept into his expressions when he thought no one was looking. However, tonight was the one exception. Through the efforts of Shigaraki pulling a few strings and calling in a favor from Kurogiri, Izuku and I received some fake IDs and managed to get away to a remote hot spring in Hokkaido. I didn't know where it was exactly, somewhere in the mountains, but the Crait Hot Spring staff had been incredibly accommodating. Now Izuku was resting soundly and I was the one left lying awake at night. The shoe was on the other foot.
As the duvet fell away from my bare shoulders and I pressed my face into the palms of my hands, I was made plainly aware of the chill in the air by the goose-pimples forming on my skin. Was it already winter? It was difficult to keep track of the days lately. Time was just a series of random events that blurred together for me now. That thought and the nip of the cold shot a pang of loneliness through me as I carefully moved towards the futon where Izuku slept, overcome with a desire to feel his body heat, to know that he was real. I took great precautions at making sure not to disturb him, scooching very subtly until I was curled up under the duvet with him. I was greeted by the pleasurable sight of his bare muscular chest, his kimono lying discarded in a pile somewhere next to mine, leftovers from hours earlier. An inviting warmth came off of him in waves as I curled into him. It was like sleeping next to a radiator- was that part of his Quirk or was that just him?
I thought of making an offhanded joke about the comparison of temperature and the attractiveness of my husband that would have probably left him a blushing mess, had he been awake for it, when he sucked in a sudden breathe and had me reconsider if mind-reading was one of his Quirks as well. Naturally, I froze in place as he stretched his arms outward, but rather than wake up like I had initially feared, he unconsciously tugging me closer so that his head rested on my chest and snuggled me like I was some sort of oversized teddy bear. After a tense couple of seconds of me being positive that he wouldn't stir again, I relaxed and gently began running my fingers through his messy moss-colored hair and inhaled. No matter the circumstances, his scent always smelled a little bit like mint to me. Even after a dip into the mineral hot springs, the scent of his hair was still so calming and familiar to me. How was it possible to smell this good all the time? It wasn't fair! His hair was amazing too, the perfect mix of tousled and bedhead that took almost no effort to style. The softness, the way his hair curled under my fingertips, it was hard not to be enamored by it. My nacre wedding ring glinted in the nightlight as it tangled with the longer strands of hair. A promise ring sat opposite on my other hand, a heart shaped band with a mood stone set in the center that was green like his eyes and just as bright. I hadn't taken either of them off since receiving them, hence why the mood-stone was now broken and permanently frozen in time.
A sleepy smile stretched at the corner of his lips as he let out a soft sigh into my ear and neck, causing a slight shiver to go up my spine. Having him be so close and affectionate even in his sleep, I felt the warm tightness in my chest expand and was suddenly overcome with affection and an ever increasing desire to protect this man's smile. The dream from earlier only exacerbated that feeling, magnifying the intense fear and despair I had felt earlier when I stared into Dream Izuku's empty and cold, death-like expression. He tried so hard not to be his father that he ended up becoming him anyways, a shell of a man that had been left broken and unfeeling, damned to live a miserable life of loneliness and a hollow existence, one of his own making. Unwilling tears began welling up in the corners of my eyes from sleep and sadness and love as I began memorizing the intricate details of his face. The cluster of freckles on his cheek were like little diamonds, tiny stars that made up an entire galaxy on his skin. Unable to keep my impulses in-check, I began tracing new constellations on his cheeks like he was a human connect-the-dots.
"Mmmmm tickles..." the former pro-hero murmured.
"Oh no, did I wake you? I'm sorry, Izuku."
"..s'fine..." His mouth stretched into a wide yawn before blinking owlishly down at me, asking in a sleepy voice, "When did... you... get here?" After finally understanding that he meant ending up in his bed and not arriving at the hot spring like I had just jumped off of a plane to come visit for the night, I shrugged.
"I got cold..."
"Oh...? Then... let me... warm you up," he slurred, stretching his arms around me and covering both of us with the duvet like a bird swaddling their young. "Better?" I nodded and closed my eyes, reveling in the sensations as my lips met his in a slow, sleepy kiss, moments that I absolutely lived for. "I like... waking up to you like this..." he hummed smilingly into my neck before pressing a soft, lazy kiss against it. I almost shook with relief. This was him, the man that I loved, not that thing that had appeared in my nightmare, something I was desperate to forget. I must've made some sort of outward motion or noise to indicate distress because the soft kisses trailing down my neck suddenly stopped. "Alyssa...? Honey, what's wrong? Are you alright?" Izuku asked, his voice steadily growing more clear with concern. "Did you have a nightmare?" That last statement hit home as I felt my throat close up, trying to choke down the rush of tears that were quickly rising to the surface. I nodded.
"You want to talk about it?" I considered for a moment but shook my head instead. It wasn't the nightmare itself that scared me. It was the feelings that it had left behind, the worst fears I hadn't realized until now come to life: an uncaring Izuku Midoriya. The thought was honestly more heart-breaking than it was terrifying to me, and the likely chance of it coming to pass made it hard to contain the tears any longer. "Come here," he said before pulling me in a tight, all-encompassing hug that I loved so much. The man really gave the best hugs in the world. His hand rubbed soothing circles into my back while the other wiped away the stray tears that ran down my face. "You know you can tell me anything. You don't have to burden yourself like this."
"I know... It's not that... It's just... It made me realize something. What you said, back when you were sparring against one of the Nomus the other day," I struggled to keep my voice steady as I carefully chose the next words to come out of my mouth. "It... it bothered me a bit."
"What? What was it that I said?" Izuku said, his expression pensive as he tried to think back to what exactly it was he had said that had made me so upset. "Was it that I wanted to take those guys' Quirks and give them to you or was it something that had to do with... me? Do you have... regrets, being married to someone like me?"
"What!? N-No! No! Not at all! Don't you ever even think that, okay? I forbid you from ever thinking that again, ever." I frowned, adamantly shutting down his chaotic spiral. Through circumstances I didn't think was possible, Izuku somehow had worse self-esteem than I did and that caused him to have a lot of self-doubt. He was such an incredibly positive person that most people wouldn't believe that every day that he was bright and chipper, he would have two more where he would be dark and depressed, constantly fighting his inner demons. The last couple of years had also not been great for his mental health either, timed with dealing with the Hero Association's corruption and survivor's guilt after causing the deaths of many our UA classmates that caused him to question his own beliefs, it had been a veritable snowball effect of stress and anxiety that had warped him far beyond the naive middle-schooler that wanted nothing more than to become the number one hero.
"It was how... willing you were to hurt people for me. Hearing you talk about how you'd rather let the world burn and forsake everyone else so easily if it meant I'd smile ... it... it scares me, Izuku. It honestly terrifies me to think that I'm the only thing in your life grounding you."
"Oh..."
"Don't get me wrong. I appreciate that you care so much about me and that you were willing share something like that with me, since I want you to not be afraid to tell me things. This isn't about me being afraid of you, 'cause I'm not. I'm afraid for you. Being the sole tie to someone's sanity, that's so much responsibility to have. What if something bad happens to me?"
His emerald orbs locked onto mine as he rolled over so that he was leaning over on top of me, his expression sharp and brimming with dark determination. "I won't let that happen. I'll protect you."
"But what if something does? Despite your insane amount of rule-breaking powers, you're not God, Izuku," I said stubbornly, matching his intense stare with one of my own. "It doesn't even have to be a villain. Literally anything could happen, to either of us, at any point in our lives. What if I choked on a piece of steak or- or got eaten by a... a polar bear or something?"
"...I don't think polar bears live in Japan," Izuku mumbled with a perplexed expression that struck me as cute in the moment, which was aggravating and distracting.
"That's not the point, Izuku. The point is that I love you, and I want you to be happy, but I want there to be things and people in your life that make you happy other than me," I pouted, wanting in earnest for him to take me seriously. "I don't want to be your only pillar of support. One pillar does not a house make. I want you to be able to rely on others. I want you to have interests that don't revolve around me and this hot mess we live in, and most importantly, I want you to want that too. You've given up so much for your dreams and doing what you believe is right. I just don't want you to throw your life away and lose yourself in the process. I mean, what if somewhere down the road, we end up having a kid?"
"W-What?" Izuku stammered in a wide panic, giving me the realization that that was the exact wrong thing to say as he appeared more alarmed by the second.
"I mean, I'm not saying that to suggest that I'm pregnant! I just meant, they would be important to you too, right? And raising a kid takes a lot of work and outside help, and I just want that support for you-" I rambled, trying desperately to backtrack and do damage control while the tiny me inside my head panicked and kept slamming the abort button, "-and I know that I'm just going on side-tangents a bit and getting off topic, but I just want the best for you, Izuku. You deserve to be happy just like the rest of us."
"I... didn't know you felt so strongly about all this."
"I know that's a lot for you to handle and that trusting people hasn't been the easiest thing lately, and that I'm probably incredibly selfish by asking you to do all of this, but I want you to be happy too. Whether we live sixty more years or sixty minutes, I want you to keep going and find meaning again, and whatever you do, don't ever stop caring about people. It's your heart that I fell in love with, not this muscly, all-powerful Quirk-stealing hero." Unable to contain myself any longer, I placed both of my hands on the sides of his face and squished them in an effort to get him to look at me. "Can you promise me that you'll do that for me? Live, try, and love, even if it's hard?"
"I..." He paused for a moment as the rest of him caught up with what I was saying. "Okay, I promise, I'll try." His arms then pulled me into a hug and I sighed into his chest.
"Thank you. That's all I ever wanted." We laid like that for a few moments, just taking in each other's breaths, steady rising chests and the soft thumping of our hearts. Then his chest stilled, as if to contemplate on whether or not he wanted his next breath to come, before I felt his voice rumbled softly, "...you still like the muscles though, right?"
I looked up at him with a bemused smile and let out a chuckle before nuzzling him in reassurance, relieved that he wasn't taking everything I said out of context. "Yes. Very much so, although I can't believe that's what you took out of that conversation," I gave him a kiss square on the jaw. "You're so cute when you're concerned."
His lips pressed into a small pout as he mumbled, "I'm not cute," in that adorable way of his when he sulked, most of the time when I had gotten the better of him in our teasing matches, most of which I had remained supreme reigning champion over.
"Yes, you are."
"No, I'm not," he reiterated with a huff, "I'm cool, not cute..."
"Yes, you are, Izuku Midoriya- if anything, you're both, and you'll not convince me otherwise," I said with a slightly stubborn edge in my tone, still unable to comprehend on why men didn't like to be called cute. It's not like being cute made them any less manly or attractive. If anything, it was a term of endearment to show that we women found them appealing and had plenty of affection to give them as a result. At least, it was in my case. "It's what I love about you. Besides, I'll take cute over cool any day." Unsure if Izuku was fully convinced by this, I tilted his head towards mine and said "hey" before pecking him on the cheek and whispering "I love you" with a goofy smile.
"I love you too... dummy," he murmured finally before going in for a kiss, this time on the lips. Five years together, and he still could make me melt and steal my breath away. Once he pulled away, he rested his forehead against mine for a moment, just taking it all in. Then the next few words out of his mouth dropped the moment on its head. "So... you want kids?"
I blinked up at him in confusion for a moment, still reeling from the sensations his kiss had brought me and the conversational whiplash that followed. Well, this certainly hadn't been how I thought our night would go. So he was still thinking about it. Great. Nice to know that in the midst of all my word vomit of heated, heart-felt declarations and fears, a subject both of us had missed bringing up during the duration of our entire relationship decided to pop up, one that we now decided to have that conversation about only after we had gotten married. Better now than later after popping out two kids with a third on the way, I guess.
"Well, obviously not right now, but in the future, yeah. Maybe," I shrugged awkwardly with a bashful expression. "I mean, I definitely wouldn't mind starting a family with you, having a few more little heroes running around with freckled cheeks to kiss and tease and love." It wasn't something I actively tried to think about, but I would have been lying if I had said it hadn't come up. In fact, it was sort of a fantasy of mine. Most of my life, I had thought about having kids but never considered the consequences until I was older. The reasons against having them were valid: I was too selfish to become a parent. Pregnancy sounded like a nightmare to have to live through (especially when you had anxiety). I wasn't financially stable at the moment. My family had a series of health problems and mental disorders, including alcoholism and cancer. The question of citizenship and growing up in a bilingual household. Terrible genetics- most of all, the incredibly likely chance that our child would end up being born Quirkless and having to go through the hardship and suffering both Izuku and I had faced dozens of times in our lives, something I wasn't willing to let my child face and fully prepared to prevent if I could help it.
Despite all of this, Izuku was probably one of the few men in the world I was willing to go through all of that uncertainty for. It was my walking through fire moment for him. The maternal desire to have children was still there, and if Izuku honestly wanted them, I would gladly give him one. During all of this internal debate, the green-haired vigilante had remained eerily silent, which was concerning since normally he would be a frantic mess right now. In all of this mental back-and-forth, it had never occurred to me the possibility that he might not want kids at all. Being a hero had been all that Izuku wanted in life, and being the number one hero had a cost. No doubt that there would be danger and many nights where I would be left alone with the kids, Quirkless and defenseless. If that was the issue, I would gladly set aside my pride in being Quirkless and take Izuku up on his offer if it meant protecting my family so that we could live in peace.
"Why? Do you not want kids? I mean, it's fine if you don't. I understand the risks and-" Izuku on me in seconds, his forceful lips cutting off whatever thought I had and causing it to fade into the foreground. The steeliness of his eyes and the hardness of his chest as he pressed up against me, I interpreted that as he did, in fact, want kids. The way his hands crept down the familiar pathways down my lower back and thighs gave me the sudden realization that he not only wanted kids, he wanted them now.
"W-Wait, right now?!" I said after regaining some lucidity enough to break away from the heated kiss.
"Yes."
"But- we literally just got married and-" I stammered, trying to be the voice of reason despite it quickly slipping away at his touch, "It's a terrible time to have a kid-!"
"Sixty years or sixty minutes, right?" Izuku growled in a low voice, his eyes holding a certain level of desire and possessiveness that made me melt. "We don't know what tomorrow brings. There is always going to be risk, whether it's me being the number one hero or being on the run from the heroes. Worst comes to worse, we can leave the country and fly back to your family in the states and live there. All I know is that I want you, whatever that entails, and that I'm tired of people telling me what I can and can't do and leaving me with nothing but regrets. I'll be damned if we spend the rest of our lives walking on eggshells because of it."
After such a strong declaration, all I could whisper was, "okay" before everything slipped away in a series of exchanges of soft moans, kisses, and laughter.