He was waiting for them the minute they stepped out of the Council Chamber. Anakin's fury hit him like a blaster bolt to the chest and Qui-Gon knew immediately that he would have his work cut out for him.
"Honestly, Anakin, I wish you would settle down," Obi-Wan said, his voice more weary than Qui-Gon had ever heard it before.
"You could have at least told them everything instead of dancing around the subject like you always do!" Anakin shot back.
Obi-Wan was irritated now. "And what good would that have done, hmm?"
"I don't know. Maybe they could have, oh, I don't know, gotten you some help?"
"I don't need any help, Anakin. And I told the Council all they needed to know about the mission."
"Right," Anakin replied, rolling his eyes, "and I'm the Galaxy's Greatest Politician. Nice try, Obi-Wan, but I'm not falling for it. You might've been able to fool everyone else in that room, but not me. Not this time."
A light cough was enough to startle them to attention.
"Qui-Gon!" Anakin exclaimed, a touch of relief in his voice. "Could you tell this idiot to let me take him to the Halls of Healing? Better yet, drag him there yourself?"
"I don't need a healer, Anakin," Obi-Wan sighed. "I just need some rest."
"Hah! So you admit it!"
"Anakin—"
"Obi-Wan." This time, it was Qui-Gon who said his name, stopping his Padawan in his tracks. "Now, do either of you care to explain to me what's going on here?"
"There's nothing to explain," Obi-Wan said curtly, "it's all in the mission report."
"Uh, no, it's not," Anakin cut in, earning a lethal look from Obi-Wan.
"I'm sure Anakin can fill you in on anything I missed. Now, if you'll excuse me."
Qui-Gon didn't mean to grab his arm so forcefully, so suddenly, but he was driven by a sinking feeling that the situation was slipping through his fingers. So he acted on impulse in a vain attempt to get to the bottom of it all.
Nothing could have prepared for Obi-Wan's reaction.
A flash of anxiety lit up the Force before fading away almost as quickly as it had appeared. Nanoseconds later, Obi-Wan shuddered violently and jerked away, wrenching his arm out from Qui-Gon's grasp.
And then Qui-Gon met his gaze, though only for the briefest of moments. He would never forget the sight of the pure, unadulterated fear that flashed across his blue orbs.
"Obi-Wan…" Anakin's voice had gone down to a near whisper.
The Jedi in question, for his part, looked utterly shocked and embarrassed.
"Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon said softly, taking on the tone he'd use to calm a frightened Youngling.
"I… I'm sorry," he mumbled, sounding almost breathless. "I need to go."
He broke into a jog and was halfway down the hall before Qui-Gon could even think to follow.
How had everything spiraled out of control so quickly? He'd returned from Felucia expecting a nice few days during which he might relax and spend some rare time with his lineage. Instead, he was caught in the middle of a mission gone wrong, trying to keep himself and his friends afloat in the aftermath of a bad decision.
Oh, Obi-Wan, he mourned as he watched his Padawan disappear around a corner, what have they done to you?
"He won't talk to me." Anakin's whisper shattered his thoughts and he turned towards the boy. "Ever since we rescued him from…" He gulped. "From that horrible place… Besides asking if the colonists were all right and avoiding Governor Roshti like the Blue Shadow Virus, he won't say a word about what happened."
Exasperated, Qui-Gon turned. "What did happen, Anakin?"
The young Knight shrugged. "Rex told me a little bit about it, he was there too, but the rest I can only guess."
Qui-Gon crossed his arms, trying to keep his worry from boiling over. "First of all, are you all right?"
Another shrug. "I'll be fine."
Qui-Gon fixed him with a pointed look.
"Really!" Then, a sigh and Anakin glanced down at the floor. "Well… I'd be better if he'd only let me in—if he'd let me help him. He's so stubborn."
Says the pot to the kettle.
"All right. Second:"—Qui-Gon took a breath—"what happened?"
Anakin massaged the back of his neck, an evasive motion Qui-Gon had come to expect whenever his Grand-Padawan didn't want to talk about something.
"It was… just a mission. We freed the slaves, stopped the Separatists from taking over Shili, and saved the day."
Another look, softer this time. "Anakin, you and I both know anything that involves slavery isn't 'just a mission' for you."
"What do you want me to say? That I wish we could've destroyed the entire Zygerrian Empire? That we should've stopped Dooku before he ever set foot on my Padawan's home planet in the first place? That I was too late to rescue Obi-Wan when he—" Anakin paused his tirade when his voice cracked. "When he needed me… Master Qui-Gon, I… I let him down. I should've been quicker. He was already pretty beat up from his fight with D'Nar… I never should've let him come along."
Qui-Gon briefly wondered how one-sided said fight was before sighing and placing a comforting hand on Anakin's shoulder. "You know he would have gone anyway."
"Yeah… But that still doesn't account for the fact that he and Rex were forced into slavery because I messed it all up. Me!"
Ah, Qui-Gon thought, his stomach churning at the news, so that's it, then.
"I thought I had it all under control. You know," Anakin went on, shifting his rapidly blinking eyes towards the ceiling, "for so many years, I wanted—no, needed—Obi-Wan to understand me; to truly understand what it felt like to have someone you hate hold your life and the lives of everyone you love in their cold hands. And now that it's finally happened… Force, I never should've wished for something so incredibly stupid!"`
As if to emphasize his point, Anakin smacked himself on the forehead. Qui-Gon held back a wince.
"And now that it's happened…" Anakin continued after a moment, "I want nothing more than to turn back time. I've never seen him so broken and it's… it's…"
He trailed off, swallowing hard.
And it's breaking you, Qui-Gon finished silently. Oh, Anakin.
He felt a sudden rage at the Council for allowing this mission to happen, at the Zygerrians for abusing his Padawans, and at the Separatists for even starting this blasted war!
"This isn't your fault and it will never be your fault, no matter how hard to try to make it so. Obi-Wan is very stubborn," Qui-Gon said, purposely keeping his voice neutral lest he unfairly subject Anakin to his rising anger. "But, then again, so are we. And your young Padawan, she's stubborn as well. Together, we'll be able to heal him."
And each other, he mused as Anakin slowly nodded.
"Well," Anakin began, "we need to get him to see a healer, for starters."
"Easier said than done," Qui-Gon said with a hum. "We'll have to handle this carefully…"
Another nod from Anakin.
"But first…" Qui-Gon fixed him with a stare that held no room for negotiation, "you have to tell me everything."
"You mean about the mission, or…"
"Everything."
Anakin shrunk back a bit.
"From start to finish, every detail you can remember about the mission. From Shili, to Zygerria, to Kadavo. Everything."
Reluctantly, Anakin agreed.
"Good."
As they started their walk down the Temple halls, Anakin recounted every horrific detail and Qui-Gon found his anger growing.
Anger leads to hate, he reminded himself, and hate leads to suffering…
"If you could've seen Obi-Wan when he walked out of that tower," Anakin was saying. "It was like he didn't even bother fighting back."
Suffering.
"And Ahsoka's face Rex flinched away from her."
So much needless suffering.
"I couldn't do it, Master. I knew it would blow all our covers, but I couldn't swing that filthy electro-whip."
The sharp pain digging into his palm pulled his attention off Anakin and onto his clenched fist.
So much for releasing your anger into the Force, Qui-Gon.
Well, he would just have to try again later—after Anakin had finished filling him in
"I could've killed them all," Anakin admitted towards the end of his story. "Every kriffing one of them."
"Why didn't you?" Qui-Gon probed, keeping his voice calm.
"Ahsoka stopped me, I guess. And Obi-Wan.'
Obi-Wan…
They'd arrived at his door.
For a long moment, Qui-Gon reached into the room with the Force in an attempt to gauge his Padawan's mental state. It wasn't looking good—things seemed too calm, too quiet. Obi-Wan still had his shields firmly in place, but after more than twenty years fighting beside his former Padawan, Qui-Gon had learned how to pick up on the subtle details about Obi-Wan that most people missed.
And despite the shields and the pretense of serenity, he felt tiny trickles of anxiety, guilt, and fear seep through their bond.
Hold on, Obi-Wan. I'm coming.
Beside him, Anakin was capping off his tale. "And he hasn't been to see a medic since then. We both know a few measly bacta patches aren't going to fix days of suffering at the hands of a Zygerrian slaver."
His last words came out as a growl and Qui-Gon knew right then that he needed to see Obi-Wan first—alone.
Anakin was still too high-strung and emotional from the memories his mission had no doubt brought to the surface of his mind. Why the Council ever thought sending a former slave on this kind of mission is beyond me.
And he would certainly be exchanging a few choice words with them about it as soon as he'd finished cleaning up their tangled mess that had just arrived back from Hell.
He turned towards Anakin when he realized the young man had gone unusually silent.
"You're going in alone, aren't you?"
Qui-Gon smirked. "Well, someone has to check up on Ahsoka."
"Yeah, I guess so, but—Ah," Anakin said with a knowing smirk of his own, "I see what you did there."
"I promise I'll send for you soon. I just… need to talk with him."
"But you said you would help me, not the other way around."
Qui-Gon gave him a look, eliciting a sigh from the Knight.
"Fine. But call me the second you've made some headway, okay?"
"Of course, Anakin. And let Ahsoka know that it's going to be all right."
"Sure, Master."
I hope, Qui-Gon couldn't help but think as he watched Anakin dash off in search of his Padawan.