Prompt : Prompt for HADS: haymich takes peeta out for guys night and they talk about what they all like that their girls do

The Stag Party

"I'm sorry you ain't getting a better stag party, boy." Haymitch offered, taking a sip from his mug. It was sadly lacking in anything alcoholic but the herbal tea was his favorite drink of choice so late in the evening when booze wasn't an option – and with Effie on a rampage about his drinking, lately it wasn't.

Peeta shrugged and flashed him a small smile before moving his bishop. "If I beat you, it'll be worth it."

The chessboard was on a small side-table between their armchairs. Chess was a good way to spend a quiet night, never mind when the company was good and there was a fire merrily cracking in the fireplace, but he wasn't sure it was the best way to spend his last night as a free man.

Katniss, Jo, Annie and Effie were all over at the kids' place having what Effie had called a "hen party" which suspiciously sounded like one of their usual girls nights but since they were sadly outnumbered in the guys department once little Finn had fallen asleep, it had only been Peeta and Haymitch left and no way they could go anywhere or do anything special with the kid under their watch.

It suited Haymitch somehow because he had really been cutting down on liquor lately and he just knew that he wouldn't have been able to resist temptation if they had gone at the bar or done something similar. And it wasn't really like there was a lot of choices in Twelve for that sort of stuff anyway. So they had settled for a game of chess, like they regularly did.

"Never beat me yet." he mocked, ignoring the obvious trap the kid was laying out and moving a pawn.

"It would be a nice gift for my wedding." Peeta pointed out.

"Wouldn't feel as good as it's gonna feel when you earn it." Haymitch countered, finishing the last of his tea. Peeta's was already gone. He nodded to the discarded mug at the foot of the boy's armchair. "Want more?"

"Sure." Peeta shrugged.

Haymitch grabbed the mug and smirked. "Don't touch the board."

"I don't cheat!" the kid protested in earnest.

He snorted on his way to the kitchen. "You think I don't know Jo taught you how?"

Johanna was a decent chess player when she applied herself. The problem was that she grew bored halfway through a game and tended to speed the process up by sneaking pieces off the board when he wasn't looking.

"Jo doesn't respect rules. I do." Peeta called out behind him.

"True enough." he answered from the kitchen.

He refilled their mugs from the tepid teapot, grabbed the basket half-full of leftover muffins from that morning and carried the whole thing back to the living-room where he flopped back down on the armchair. Peeta had yet to make a move. He was staring at the board with a frown.

"You're too good at this game." Peeta complained. "Whatever I do, you're three moves ahead of me."

"You need to see the big picture." He shrugged. He grabbed a muffin and cut a small piece, brushing the crumbs off his lap and immediately brushing them off under the armchair with his sock-clad toes. He didn't want Effie to lecture him. "I almost made it my talent, you know." he said after a long second. "Back then."

He wasn't sure why he was brushing the Games subject. It wasn't a topic they visited often and certainly not in recent years. The rebellion had taken place long enough ago that they had all been happy to pretend that the Games belonged to another life entirely.

"Yeah?" Peeta asked, clearly curious. "What did you do instead?"

A small amused smile stretched his lips. It had been ridiculous back then and it still was now. "Riddles."

"Really?" The boy was trying not to laugh and Haymitch waved him off good-naturally.

"Chaff said it would make for a better show." he explained. "Understood only later it wouldn't have been clever to show off just how good at tactics I was."

Peeta remained silent for a while, watching him while Haymitch pretended to study the board.

"I thought you didn't have a mentor… I didn't know Chaff…" the boy hesitated.

"He took over after I won." Haymitch said. "I needed another victor on the road with me. Escorts are all well and good but…" He shrugged again, uncomfortable now. He cleared his throat. "Anyway. Your turn, boy. Ain't getting any younger here."

Peeta turned back to the chessboard with a small sigh and tentatively moved his knight.

Because it was the night before his wedding Haymitch did the nice thing and passed on the opportunity to finish the game in two moves. He moved another inconsequential piece, leading Peeta to believe he had a bigger plan in mind than the one he was actually going for.

"You're nervous about tomorrow?" he asked, popping another piece of muffin in his mouth. It had grown a bit stale because they had forgotten to put them away in the bread box.

"Not really." Peeta hummed, taking a gulp of his tea. He flashed him a mischievous look, trying to hide his smile. "I'm not sure I've got time to be nervous. It's not on Effie's schedule."

Haymitch chuckled and granted him the point with a brief tilt of the head, munching on his muffin. "She went a bit overboard, yeah?"

He had lost count of the number of fabulous ideas he had been forced to talk her out off – because Katniss had begged. The kids would probably have been happy with a quick trip to the Justice Building, a dinner and a toasting only witnessed by them, Annie and Johanna. Effie had almost had a heart attack when they had told her that and had pleaded with them to be allowed to organize everything. From simple it had grown into overly complicated for something that would have only five guests, one of which was five and very unlikely to really remember the event.

The wedding gown alone had cost a ridiculous amount – and he would know because he was the one who had paid the bill since it was apparently their wedding gift to Katniss. He wasn't sure how much Katniss cared for whatever she was going to wear but when he had asked her about it, she had gotten a dreamy look on her face that had almost made the price palatable to him. As long as his girls were happy…

He had been forced to tell Effie that the release of a hundred butterfly when the children would exit the Justice Building was over the top. And she hadn't been keen on abandoning that idea.

"She just wants everything to be perfect for us." Peeta's smile softened. "You know she cried for fifteen minutes when we went to get the suit?"

He wasn't surprised. She had been a nervous wreck for a couple of weeks. He had told her she was putting too much pressure on herself with organizing this wedding, that nobody expected anything extraordinary and that she was stressing herself over nothing. She was overwhelmed by the whole thing, kept saying their kids were all grown up as if they hadn't been living together for five years as it was…

"I bet she ain't gonna last five minutes tomorrow." He snorted. "She's gonna be in tears well before Katniss comes in."

"Probably." Peeta admitted. "But it's nice. That she loves us so much."

The boy moved a piece a little at random but Haymitch didn't comment, knowing his thoughts had turned to his own mother, the same way he had caught Katniss with a brooding look on her face a few times lately. Effie might have been behaving like a hysterical woman over that wedding but at least it showed she cared. He doubted Peeta's mother would have shown the same enthusiasm and Katniss' mother had declined coming back to Twelve to attend even though she had sent her good wishes.

As far as Haymitch was concerned Effie had been more of a mother to those two than their real ones ever were. He wouldn't say it out loud because he knew it might cause unnecessary drama but he also knew he wasn't the only one with that opinion.

"So." Peeta said with intent, a forced grin on his lips. To switch to a more joyful subject probably. "Any last advice before tomorrow?"

"Stay alive?" he joked, washing a piece of muffin with a mouthful of tea. "What do I know, kid? Ain't married."

"Any plan of correcting that any time soon?" the boy smoothly asked.

Haymitch almost choked on his muffing and spared his former tribute a short mild glare. He wasn't fooled. Not fooled at all. And the grin still tugging at the corner of Peeta's mouth confirmed it all. "What did that question cost you?"

"The butterflies release." Peeta offered, unrepentant. "Make sure to mention I asked, please."

He shook his head, a smile tugging at his own lips. Never underestimate Effie Trinket. Never. It was a shame she wasn't into chess because he was sure she would be a worthy opponent. Always a couple of moves ahead.

"You're as good as married though." Peeta pointed out. "You've been together how long?"

He didn't need to do the math, he knew the math. "Fifteen or five years. Depends how you want to look at it."

Apparently not sure he wanted to open that can of worms, Peeta leaned back in his armchair. "What's the best part about married life?"

Resisting the urge to deny being married for a second time – because the boy had a point – Haymitch talked without thinking. "You rarely have to use your own hand again."

The boy immediately made a face. "Thanks for that image."

"You're welcome." he taunted. "Checkmate."

Peeta stared at the board in dismay. "I want a rematch."

Haymitch glanced at the clock and figured that it was early enough that the girls would be busy for a while yet. Their girls nights tended to turn into a drinking frenzy – although with the wedding the next day, Effie might put a damper on the festivities. "Try to pay attention from the start this time."

He started arranging the pieces back into their proper spot while Peeta cradled his mugs between his hands.

"Sex isn't everything." the boy commented.

"Depends for who." Haymitch snorted. "Black or white?"

"Black." Peeta answered mechanically, watching Haymitch switch the board around and making his first move. "You can't have a whole marriage based on sex."

He glanced up at the boy and grabbed his now very lukewarm tea. "It's a big part of it. I mean…" He took a sip to give himself time to think, shrugged and then winced a little. "Without sex Effie and I wouldn't be together now. For sure. The feelings, the settling down part… It came after that."

Peeta toyed with one of his pawns before moving it. "Yeah but… It's not a good basis for…"

"Ain't saying it's a good basis." he grumbled, moving another pawn. "Wouldn't say we're a good example of what a stable couple should look like."

The boy scoffed incredulously. "You're the most stable couple I know."

"Sad for you." Haymitch deadpanned and then made a small face because he hadn't meant to be so harsh. "It ain't the same for everybody, kid. We have different histories."

"True, I guess." the boy commented. "I mean, sex with Katniss is great…"

"Ah, ah." Haymitch immediately cut him off, lifting a preventive hand. "I so don't wanna know that."

"But I wouldn't say it's why I'm marrying her." the boy continued. "I'm marrying her because I love her, all of her. I love that she always hums in the shower, that she will eat anything with cheese in it, that she always smiles when the sun hits her face just right…" Peeta shrugged, a bit sheepish. "It's the little things, you know?"

Haymitch's lips stretched into a smile. "Yeah. I do."

For him, it was all about the way Effie denied drooling in her sleep even though he found it adorable, the laugh she couldn't help when he told her a particularly terrible joke, the way she would smile at him after he planted a kiss on her lips for no reason at all…

"Maybe you're right, after all." he granted.

He would never know what would have happened to them in a world where he would have been allowed to fall in love with Effie first and fall in lust with her later. It hadn't been an option.

And at the highest of their sex affair, they hadn't been the healthiest people for each other. They had exchanged angry words instead of love declarations, bite marks instead of kisses, bruises instead of caresses…

"I've known I wanted to spend my life with her since the first time I saw her." Peeta confessed.

The chessboard was abandoned between them but Haymitch didn't remind the boy, he looked happy enough to talk about his bride to be.

"Must be nice." Haymitch mused, slouching a little. "That certainty."

Although he had been certain too once, hadn't he? When he had been sixteen and madly in love with his girl… He had been so sure he would marry her and they would fight through life together… The two of them against the world…

That dream felt so distant now. He hadn't even thought about her in ages.

"Like you're not certain of Effie." Peeta teased.

"If there's one thing I'm never certain about, it's Effie." Haymitch snorted. "She never does what you expect. She's been turning tables on me and leading me around by the nose since the day we met."

He didn't mind admitting it now. He had denied it so many times when Chaff had accused her of doing just that… But now… He could be the bigger person and admit that, as much as he protested, she was usually the one getting her way in the end.

"What's the first thing you thought when you met her?" Peeta asked curiously.

Haymitch supposed he didn't often allow that kind of questions so the boy was taking advantage. He wasn't sure what was bringing all that out that night. Maybe it simply felt cozy in his living-room and it invited confidences.

"I was drunk as a skunk." he recalled. "I think I called her ugly." Peeta laughed but didn't look particularly surprised. "Then I sobered up and I realized she had a nice ass."

Peeta clearly didn't appreciate the anecdote. "Is your mind always in the gutter?"

"When it comes to Effie?" He chuckled. "Always." He shrugged a little. "Almost always anyway. Told you. Ours ain't a big love story, kid. We're more the… passionate kind."

The boy shook his head but there was an amused smile on his lips all the same. "Is that how you call all the fighting?" Haymitch snorted and toasted him with his mug of tea. Peeta turned a little serious but he seemed to hesitate a little. "Do you… have any regret?"

"That's a serious question?" he deadpanned.

The boy winced. "No, I mean… On the big marriage things… Like… Do you ever regret not having children?"

He took a long mouthful of tea and moved a piece on the chessboard in hope of bringing Peeta's attention back on the game but no luck. He could sense there was a latent anxiety under the question. He knew the children question was a problematic one. Katniss was unwavering on the issue and Peeta… Peeta wanted them but he loved Katniss more. Hopefully.

"I never wanted them. Wasn't even an option for me." he said slowly. "Effie, now… I don't know. You'd have to ask her. I think she'd have liked it. Having babies of her own, yeah. Wouldn't have been that easy though… She's got… a medical thing or something." He shrugged. "Maybe I regret she didn't get to experience it but… She knew what she was getting into with me. She knew kids were a deal-breaker. It was always clear. She chose me anyway." He took another sip of tea. "Not having kids in itself though… No. I don't regret that. I've got you and the girl and that's enough for me. You ask me, that's enough for Effie too."

Peeta opened his mouth and closed it when they heard the front door opening. They listened to the clicking of heels coming closer. Haymitch was already smirking by the time Effie leaned against the doorframe. Her make-up was a little smudged and she had that wild spark in her eyes that told him she would regret her night in the morning.

"Hello, dears." She flashed them a grin. "Did you have a good night?"

"Less fun than yours, seems like." Haymitch teased. "I'm so gonna give you hell tomorrow for being hangovered on the kids' wedding day."

She pursed her lips and planted a hand on her hip. "I am barely tipsy. I paced myself."

"You're heading to bed?" he asked, stretching his arms over his head. "Wouldn't mind calling it a night too. I can beat Peeta's ass at chess another night."

"One of these days I'm going to win, Haymitch…" the boy warned with good humor. "I'm going to go to bed too."

The boy would be spending the night in their guestroom per Effie's insistence – something about not seeing the bride before the wedding.

"Do you have everything you need, darling?" Effie asked, wrapping an arm around the boy's shoulders when he walked in front of her. She was even more affectionate when she was drunk, which Haymitch had always found very funny. Clingy or upset, those were her two drunk moods.

He was happy to finally get into bed a few minutes later. It had been a long day and the next would be worse…

He was even happier when Effie snuggled close to his side.

"You know…" he mumbled while she reached over him to switch the lamp off. "You want to propose, you don't need to send the boy as a messenger."

She chuckled and burrowed a little against him to find a comfortable position. She ended up like most nights, with her leg hooked over his hip and her heel digging into his thigh – he had a perpetual bruise in that particular spot but he never told her off about it. "You saw through that cunning trick, didn't you?"

"Bit obvious." he mocked. "I take it the boy doesn't know I had already talked you out of the butterfly thing when you two made that deal."

"You know me, I have never been able to resist a cheap deal." she replied and then paused. "I was mostly joking."

"Mostly." he repeated.

"A girl can dream." She pressed a kiss against his shoulder. "Do not worry, I had my full of weddings for a while."

He wasn't sure if he was worried or not.

He wasn't sure if he truly would have minded it.