Kuroo made his way through the glass doors. At a fast pace, he made his way to the desk. The nurse greeted him with a warm smile. Her light brown hair was pulled up tightly in a bun, only a few strands hung loose. She seemed awfully young to be working in a hospital but Kuroo avoided asking. The only thing on his mind was Kenma.
"Hello, I'm looking for a Kozume Kenma," the raven-haired boy gave the nurse a kind smile. Her fingers flipped through the files before stopping.
"He's in room 303," his hands clutched the edge of the desk. Her smile shone brightly. Kuroo smiled and thanked her before making his way to the elevator. He felt his heart rate increase with every step. Though Kuroo knew that Kenma was probably alright, he still had a worried feeling in the pit of his stomach.
As the doors dinged, Kuroo felt his emotions build up. He wanted to make sure Kenma was okay. He didn't even know the guy and yet something made him care so much. He felt something, an overprotectiveness that he'd never felt.
Glancing at the numbers above the doors, Kuroo glided through the halls looking for room 303. His feet moved with determination. His heart beating rapidly, Kuroo finally arrived.
The dark-haired boy poked his head in only to see his soulmate sitting in bed playing some game. Kuroo brought his hand up to gently knock on the white door. Kenma's eyes never left his game.
"Come in," the blond said, still not looking up from his game.
"Is that any way to greet your soulmate?" Kuroo teased. He gave Kenma a smile.
"Oh sorry, I thought you were mom," Kenma put down his game, something that he rarely did. Right now, it felt right for him to put it away.
"How are you feeling?" Kuroo's voice was genuine, his eyes showed worry. Kenma felt that he actually cared.
"I'm alright… I suppose I should tell you why I'm here…"
Kenma was cut off by his soulmate, "You don't have to if you don't want to," Kuroo took a seat in the chair that Lev had pulled towards the bed.
"No no, I should tell you," Kenma took a deep breath before continuing, "About a year and a half ago, right after nationals, breathing became oddly difficult and I eventually sought medical help. The doctors found a cancerous tumour in my lungs. It wasn't big; maybe the size of a grape but it's slowly been growing. Now, it's in my trachea. The tank helps, I barely noticed that I was having trouble breathing," he lied, "Mom was the one who wanted me to come. Turns out she was right. So now I'm here overnight, maybe longer. They're gonna tell me when the other tests come in," Kenma played as though he didn't care but he was terrified.
"You're not alright, I can tell. You're worried. You're overthinking," Kuroo didn't know how he knew this but he did. He felt that Kenma was worried. The blond just looked at him, not knowing what to answer. He was worried; wouldn't anyone be?
"I'm on a list, I'll get new lungs eventually. I'll get bumped up if it gets worse but I'm on a list," Kenma gave a forced smile.
"Can I hold your hand?" The dark-haired boy just wanted to hold hands for an unknown reason. Kuroo felt like it was what he was supposed to do. Kenma nodded, pink dusting his cheeks.
Kuroo reached his hand over, intertwining his fingers with Kenma's. Something about this just felt right; everything between the two felt right. Their hands locked together perfectly; like they'd been sculpted to be together. They fit like a key in a lock.
Kenma's heart beat just a bit faster, his smile was just a bit brighter and his life seemed just a bit better. He knew that he was meant to be with Kuroo. It just felt normal. Kenma felt as though he'd known Kuroo his entire life. There was a lingering comfort between the two. There was familiarity.
This was when Kenma finally started to believe in soulmates. He understood, he knew the feeling. Something about Kuroo made him want to hold on and never let go. He enjoyed being with Kuroo. He enjoyed his presence, the energy was good, the air was clear.
"So Kenma, who was that Lev guy?" Kenma raised a brown and gave a smirk.
"Jealous are we?" Kuroo's cheeks flushed. He knew he wasn't jealous. He just wanted to meet him.
"No, I was just curious. How long have you been friends?" Kuroo just felt like he had to meet him. It was only right for him to meet Kenma's friends.
"I wouldn't say a friend… more like a guy I used to play volleyball with in high school. He kinda gets on my nerves sometimes. Shoyo on the other hand, he's a good friend of mine but he lives a few hours away. I met him playing volleyball in high school. He was from another team," Kenma realized how much he missed Shoyo. It had been a while since they'd talked.
Kuroo saw the expression on Kenma's face. He knew that there was a little sorrow when Kenma thought about his friend."This Shoyo, you miss him?" Kenma simply nodded.
"Yeah, we met my second year. He has such a passion for volleyball. It's like no matter how bad the game is going, he still can't help but stay positive. He sees greatness in the other players. He's in his third year at Karasuno High School. Maybe I'll get to see him during his next break, " Kenma looked down at his hand still linked with Kuroo's. Should he tell Shoyo about Kuroo? He'd want to know. He'd be so happy. He was still waiting to turn 18. Shoyo just couldn't wait for his string to appear. It haunted him not knowing who his soulmate was.
"He sounds great. I wonder if I'll get to meet him. Maybe when you get better, we could get a group of friends to play," Kuroo gave Kenma's hand a comforting squeeze. Kenma's eyes never left their linked hands.
The thought of being able to play normally, like he used to, brought Kenma great joy. That was really all he wanted; he wanted to be normal. He wanted to play again. He wanted to be himself again. Kuroo noticed his blank expression. Placing his hand on their linked hands, Kuroo couldn't help but feel grateful. He had finally met his soulmate. He was holding his soulmate's hand.
The boys were taken aback when a female voice echoed through the room, "Awn! Kenma, sweetheart! Is this Kuroo?" Both boys glanced up to see Kenma's mother. Both boys felt their faces heat. Kenma Quickly pulled his hand away.
"May I come in?" Kenma gave his mother a nod before looking down at his blankets.
"Pleasure to meet you Mrs. Kozume," Kuroo said as he bowd. He wasn't expecting to see Kenma's mother but he assumed it was for the better.
"The pleasure is all mine," the woman said before bowing herself. She gave Kuroo a warm smile. She hadn't planned to see him but it was a pleasant surprise.
"Are you okay for tonight or do you want me to stay?" Kenma's mother assumed that the boys would want time together. She felt that it was not her place to get in the way. Her boy was eighteen, surely he could make his own decisions. He was under observation at the hospital. Everything was okay, she tried to comfort herself. Though she wanted to give her son space, she also wanted to make sure that he was okay and safe.
"I think I can manage for the night. Dad might need help tonight; you know how he is with cooking. Could you bring me a few things from home?" Kenma knew that his father needed his mother more than he did. It's not like he'd need anything. He wasn't going to make his mother sleep in a chair by his bed. He couldn't ask her to do that. She'd done it so many times. She'd been at his bedside through everything. He was a grown boy, he was okay for a night at the hospital alone.
"Are you sure you'll be alright?" His mother placed her hand on his shoulder. Her touch was comforting. Something Kenma knew he needed but didn't want to admit. Getting told that your cancer has spread wasn't something that you wanted to hear. Kenma wanted to be okay, he wanted to stop worrying his mother. It broke him to see her struggle through this. THis was why he was scared to meet his soulmate. He didn't want to burden Kuroo with this. What if he were to die? If Kuroo hadn't met him he wouldn't be half as hurt when he was gone.
"Yeah, could you just bring me my phone charger, my switch charger, a few sets of clothes and my shower stuff, please?"
"Of course sweetheart, I'll go get that right away. I'll be back in about half an hour," she gently placed a kiss on his head before leaving. Kenma smiled to himself. He knew she cared.
"She seems like a great mom," Kuroo spoke after a long silence. He was right, she was a great mom, no she wasn't a great mom. She was the best mom.
"Only the best," Kenma never understood the others who were embarrassed to say that their parents cared for them. Wasn't it normal for your parents to love you? It wasn't something to be embarrassed about. Sure, Kenma didn't enjoy having any type of attention drawn to him but he never once said that he hated his parents; he thought it was absurd to say such a thing.
Kuroo placed his forearms on the bed and simply watched Kenma. The blond was lost in thought. His eyes looked tired, how was he taking this? How was he feeling? This wasn't something you just grazed over the way he did. Kuroo struggled to know if he should ask or not.
"Kenma?" Kuroo asked, making his soulmate look up. Kenma's eyes locked with Kuroo's, "How are you really doing? Not physically, emotionally," Keroo's voice dripped with worry, his heart ached knowing that Kenma wasn't doing well. He barely knew this boy and it hurt him deeply to see him in this position.
Kuroo had observed Kenma's interaction with his mother. Their relationship was a good one but Kenma held back a lot. Kenma's eyes carried sorrow that his mouth refused to voice. Kuroo just knew, he met kenma a month ago and yet this was it, he felt like he'd known him since birth. Kenma's shoulders carried a weight that most boys his age couldn't imagine. This was something that needed to be talked about. Kuroo thought that Kenma must have been one of the strongest people he'd ever met. To keep all his emotions in, to keep all his fears in, Kenma must be suffering like no other boy Kuroo knew.
"I'm okay I guess. Sure it sucks but it's life. What am I supposed to do? I can't pretend it's not there but I can't just cry every day. Sure, it's hard to get up and roll this thing around every day, sure it's hard to see my mother, it's even harder when I hear her crying, crying because of me," Kenma didn't know why he was saying all this. Warm tears streamed from Kenma's eyes. The blond didn't know why he was crying, now of all times. It was just happening, "Hearing her cry because I am sick, hearing my father worry about him outliving me, sure it's hard to say that I had to drop out of college because my cancer got so bad, sure it was hard to have to tell my friends that I can't play with them because my lungs are too bad, sure it was hard to fake being okay around you and Bokuto, sure it's hard but that's fucking life," Kenma was now breaking out into uncontrollable sobs. He hadn't cried in so long, he talked about this, sure he had therapy to go to but he never had to be this honest. Something about Kuroo just made him want to say what he had to say.
Kuroo reached over, placing his hands over Kenma's. His heart sank through every word. How hadn't he noticed that Kenma was suffering when they played? Why did Kenma have to deal with this? He didn't deserve this. No one did but Kenma deserved it less than anyone. How was Kuroo supposed to fix this? There was nothing he could say right now. There was nothing that anyone could say to make Kenma feel better. Kenma let this build up for years. This was something that he couldn't change by clicking a few buttons. Kenma had to deal with it. The thought of that made Kuroo sick to his stomach. He just wanted to fix it, to make it all better with one word.
All Kuroo could do was sit there in silence, his hands rubbing Kenma's forearms. It was too soon to hug but Kuroo felt that he had to do something. "I'm so sorry Kenma…" was all that the boy managed to say. It broke Kuroo's heart to not be able to help. For now, all he could do was hold Kenma's hands.