It wasn't like he hadn't meant to ask her, he just hadn't meant to ask her like that. Not with every eye in the room on him and not like such an idiot. He was never going to live this down. Not at work and definitely never at home.
It was the last big staff meeting before Christmas and Billy had started to wrap up with the last item in the agenda, which was the vacation schedule for the following week. Lee had only been listening with half an ear to the usual backpedalling from everyone who didn't want to have to work over Christmas. For years, he'd been the go-to guy but oddly, no one seemed to be expecting him to work this time.
"Scarecrow, you've got the seniority – I don't expect to see you on the roster," Billy said gruffly. "Or you either, Francine. The youngsters can pick up the slack."
The so-called youngsters – all agents in their late twenties - scowled slightly at that but looked resigned. It wasn't like they hadn't already been aware that they were likely to be stuck with it.
"Oh you can put me on the list if you need to, Billy," said Francine. "I don't have plans to go out west to see my parents this year, so I'll just be kicking around town anyway."
The younger agents had just started to look hopeful that Billy would take her up on that when Lee found himself blurting out, "You should come to Christmas dinner with me and Amanda."
Every head had swiveled to stare at him, including Amanda – he could see her mouth open in an "O" of surprise out of the corner of his eye. It wasn't that she was surprised by the invitation – they'd discussed it after all – but even she hadn't expected him to do it so publicly or in a way that made them sound so much like a couple.
"I should come to Christmas dinner?" repeated Francine slowly. "With you and Amanda?"
"Um, yeah… I mean, she's invited me again this year and uhhhh, you could come as my backup," he said wildly.
"Your backup?" Francine echoed him again. She beamed as if he'd just handed her a box of chocolates, then attempted to look serious as she leaned across the table and asked in a mock-serious stage whisper, "My God, Lee, just how bad is Christmas dinner at Amanda's house? Do I need to have guys in a truck outside as well? I mean, it's not like that hasn't happened before. I heard O'Malley spends so much time in that water company truck on Maplewood Drive that he moved his wife and kids to Arlington just to cut down on the commute time."
He could feel Amanda starting to shake beside him, and knew it was only a matter of time before she started to laugh.
"Not backup. I didn't mean backup," he managed to get out, weakly. "I meant... like as my date."
This time it was the hastily bitten back yelp of laughter from Billy that made Amanda start to shake harder. He was surprised she wasn't rattling the table.
"As your date?" Francine glanced at Amanda and her smile broadened; whatever she'd seen there, Lee could tell he'd be getting no help from that department. "Okay, so let me make sure I have this straight..." Francine continued. "You want me to come to Amanda's house. With you. For Christmas dinner. With her family. As your date?" Francine was milking this for all it was worth – she knew he and Amanda were involved, although not how much – and in a funny twist of fate, this appeared to be all her Christmases come at once.
The entire room was watching them, apparently holding their breath to see how this was going to play out, when Amanda finally rescued him.
"I think that would be lovely. The more the merrier, really," she said cheerfully. "My ex-husband and his new wife are coming, so we already have a crowd. And you won't want to miss Aunt Lillian's chocolate yule log – it's positively decadent."
"Well, if you mean it…" Francine began.
"Of course I mean it," interrupted Amanda. Their rapt audience had just started to relax thinking the entertainment was over when she added, "You two can keep the boys company at the kids' table!"
That really did set Billy off, wheezing with laughter, along with the rest of the room. He finally managed to calm down long enough to dismiss everyone and they'd all stood up to drift back to their desks, laughing and looking over their shoulders with grins that told Lee that the whole Agency would know about it by lunch time. He'd given Billy one last look as he left the room and Billy had met his eyes, gasped out "Backup! She can come as your backup!" and dissolved again, leaving Lee to slink out of the room after Amanda. He knew it wasn't even going to be five minutes before Billy was on the phone to Jeanie to tell her all about it.
"I wish all our meetings were as much fun as that," commented Amanda as they walked across the bullpen. "But maybe next time you could just perform some card tricks instead."
Francine was waiting for them at the elevator. "Don't worry, Amanda, I know you can't possibly have meant Lee to invite me. We can just tell people he was trying to bug me."
"Actually, he was supposed to invite you - just not like that." said Amanda promptly. "We'd already discussed it – I would have mentioned it myself but I thought he must have by now." She paused to punch Lee lightly in the arm, while he nodded confirmation. "You have to come - you're practically family after all. Besides, if I'm inviting my ex, Lee should get to invite his too."
"Come on, it'll be cozy," Lee teased her. "And I really do need backup – Dotty and Lillian are exponentially worse than Dotty alone."
"Well if you really mean it…" Francine almost sounded wistful.
"Francine!" Amanda reprimanded her. "You have to come – poor Lee can't have just made a complete fool of himself for nothing!" She paused, small furrow in her brow. "Except…"
"Except?" Lee and Francine said at the same time.
"Mother has a mind like a steel trap for some things," said Amanda, seriously. "So we are definitely going to have to come with a story about what happened to your chimp, just in case."
"Chimp?" asked Lee, completely thrown off. "What chimp?"
"My chimp. We'll explain on the way up," laughed Francine, pushing him into the elevator.