A/N: Faster than usual! This is the penultimate chapter.
Amanda's eyes flicked to the closed door of Cragen's office every few minutes. The paperwork she was supposed to be filling out was interminably dull and she desperately wanted to know what was being said between her girlfriend and her boss. But before Olivia could step out into the bullpen and recount the conversation to her, she and Fin caught a case.
By the time she returned to the precinct with the victim's partner to conduct a more comprehensive interview, Olivia herself was out at a crime scene with her partner, Nick. At least the two of them already had established working relationships with other members of their squad, Amanda mused to herself. It wasn't as if they usually worked cases together, and when they did, it was more in a supportive capacity. For the most part, they rarely found themselves together without any other colleagues around them.
It was their judgement, she knew, that NYPD would be concerned about. In a life or death situation, when a split second decision had to be made, their minds had to be clear and unobstructed by such pesky things as emotions. While police partners had been known to become incredibly close, there was a general understanding that sex complicated matters further. And even partners who weren't sexually involved deemed to become too close could be split up. Like Olivia and her former partner. The brunette had confessed that to Amanda the previous day, as they lay in bed talking about how they would come clean to Cragen. She and Elliot had been separated for exactly that reason, if only for a short period of time.
Amanda considered herself to be a well-trained, by the book cop. She was committed to doing her job well and put the welfare of those she was employed to protect above all else. But she had to admit to herself that if she thought Olivia was in danger, her actions may be influenced by that fact. The thought of something happening to that dark-haired beauty sent a shot of anguish through her heart.
As she gathered the paperwork she needed for the interview, she glanced at her cell phone. No message from Olivia to let her know how her talk with Cragen had gone. She'd have to be in suspense for a little longer.
Focusing instead on the partner of their latest victim, Amanda ensured she was present in the interview and not only asked all the necessary questions but provided the support they surely needed after what they had seen. By the time they had finished, her stomach was grumbling, requesting some lunch.
"I'm gonna grab a sub and I'll be right back," Amanda said as she and Fin returned to their desks. "You want anything?"
"Meatballs, extra cheese," Fin replied.
But before Amanda could shrug on her coat, their boss appeared in the doorway and asked her to come inside. Fin raised his eyebrows before offering to do the lunch run himself.
"Thanks. Tuna melt, please," Amanda replied before removing her winter coat and making her way into Cragen's office and shutting the door behind her. Well, she was expecting a conversation but she wished she had had the chance to speak with Olivia before this moment.
"Take a seat, Rollins," Cragen said, gesturing to the chairs on the other side of his desk to where he himself was sitting.
Amanda sank into the closest one, not wanting to say anything until she could gauge how the earlier talk had gone.
"I suppose you know that Detective Benson talked to me earlier?" Cragen began. Amanda nodded to confirm. "She's told me about your relationship and has assured me that it won't affect either of you in terms of your work. Is that true of you as well?"
"Absolutely, Captain," Amanda nodded. "You can rely on me to be completely professional here. No one need know we're together and we'll try to avoid drawing attention to our relationship at work. This job means the world to me and I don't want to jeopardise that."
Cragen hesitated for a moment before continuing. "We also talked about how we can approach this in terms of the two of you being in the field together. Now, I know most of the time you work with Fin and Olivia works with Amaro but there are occasions when you two will find yourself without other cops around. This is something we need to address."
When there was nothing else said, Amanda tentatively spoke: "Ok, and how do we do that?"
"I'd like to send you both on a training refresher for high-pressure situations. Our job can be intense at the best of times, let alone when you add the sort of emotions I can already see the two of you have for one another into the mix. I need that training to be front of mind, regardless of who's around you."
"I understand. Whatever you need me, us, to do, we'll do it. I … what did Liv say?"
"I'll let her fill you in on our conversation," Cragen replied. "Just because I know you two are involved, that doesn't mean I'm going to treat the two of you in relation to one another any differently. I wouldn't tell you what Fin or Amaro said to me during a private meeting and I won't tell you what Olivia said either."
Amanda blushed, feeling as if she had already demonstrated a way in which their office dynamic was going to change. "I'm sorry, you're right. That was unprofessional."
Cragen paused for a moment before taking pity on his newest hire. "Amanda, I'm happy for you. I've known Olivia for a long time and I can tell you make her happy. Sure, your relationship complicates matters a little here and as your captain, my priority is your safety and the safety of the civilians in New York. I don't deny that I anticipate this being a headache in the future but I trust Olivia's judgement implicitly. You, I don't know as well. But from everything you've shown me so far, plus the fact that I know Olivia would not have come in here this morning if she wasn't confident in both of your abilities when it comes to remaining professional at work, I'll willing to trust you too. Just don't let me down, ok?"
"Of course not, Captain. You can trust me, I promise. I'm solid."
"I don't doubt it. Right, that's all I wanted to say. Once you've finished up that tuna melt, I'd like a brief from you and Fin about this case."
"You got it. Thanks Captain."
"You're welcome."
Amanda got to her feet and made for the door but before she had left, Cragen spoke once more.
"Don't hurt her, Amanda."
She turned, her eyes meeting those of the man whom, she suddenly realised, represented the father figure Olivia had never known. He was so much more than her boss, her mentor.
"I won't, I promise."
There was a beat, then Cragen nodded once and returned to his paperwork as Amanda slipped from the quiet office and back into the communal bullpen, just in time to see Olivia and Nick walking back in. Olivia raised an eyebrow at the woman, asking a silent question. Amanda answered by jerking her head towards the break room.
"I'm gonna grab a coffee. You want one?" the brunette asked Nick who was already striding towards his desk to get started searching for a suspect based on a description a witness at the scene had given.
"Sure," Nick replied.
Olivia reached the break room before Amanda who entered seconds later. Mercifully, there was no one else inside.
"Hey, you got a new case?" Amanda asked.
"Yeah, college campus rape. Usual story. We're heading out to the frat house later. What did Cragen say?"
"I guess he just wanted to hear from me that our relationship wasn't going to be a problem, professionally speaking. He seemed pretty accepting. I figured you'd laid the groundwork for me. What was your conversation like with him this morning?"
Olivia flicked on the coffee machine before answering, remembering that she was going to have to deliver the hot drink to her partner. "You know, it didn't go like I expected," she mused, leaning against the counter.
"In a good way or a bad way?" Amanda asked, crossing the room to stand beside the woman, but making sure to keep a respectable distance between them.
"I don't quite know."
"Was he mad?" Amanda pressed, now a little concerned. From her own interaction with their boss, she had thought the man seemed relatively on board with their relationship. Or at least as on board as they could expect him to be, given the circumstances.
"No, he wasn't mad. The opposite, in fact. He seemed … happy for me, for us," she added.
Amanda smiled softly. That made a lot more sense to her. "No, Liv, he was happy for you. Cragen's known me for five minutes. He's worked with you for over a decade. It makes complete sense that he's happy to see that you're happy. I mean, assuming you are happy."
The hasty addendum made Olivia roll her eyes. "As if you don't know, Amanda. Of course I'm happy. I'm more than happy. You … look, we're at work, we can't talk like this otherwise Cragen's acceptance is going to be hastily reversed. But let's just say I'll show you just how happy you make me this evening."
Suddenly all the air seemed to have been sucked out of the break room. Amanda opened her mouth to say something but no words formed. Olivia smirked in satisfaction and set about making a coffee for herself and her partner. A third for Amanda was made when the blonde finally managed to nod that yes, in fact, she wanted a coffee too.
"So, when you manage to remember how to speak again," Olivia said as she poured milk into two of the mugs, "I wanted to ask you about your holiday plans. I know we're at work and we've got bad guys to put away but it's something that I was thinking about over the weekend. And, well, now we're public at work, I was thinking maybe we could take a trip somewhere."
Amanda beamed at the older woman. "I'd love that. A romantic getaway somewhere sounds perfect. But I kinda already told my mama I'd come home for Christmas. The holidays are a big deal in my family and I promised my sister I'd be home too. Without both of us there, my mama is a bit too much to deal with. But the two of us can weather the storm better."
"Sure, totally understand," Olivia said, forcing down the disappointment which bubbled up inside her. "No problem. Maybe we can go away some time in the spring."
"Or," Amanda said slowly, "I mean, do you wanna come with me?"
"To Georgia?" Olivia's eyes widened. She had contemplated exactly this situation but had never really thought it would happen. At least not so early on in their relationship. "To meet your family?"
"Just my mama and sister. My pa ain't around any more," Amanda replied. "No pressure. I know it's fast. Just wanted to offer. I'd like to spend the holidays with you so, yeah, if you're game, come to Georgia. We'll show you how Christmas is celebrated in the South."
Already, Olivia could feel herself more than tempted. "Are you sure? You really want me to come?"
"Completely sure. I truly want you to come." At that second sentence, the blonde winked, causing Olivia to roll her eyes at the double entendre.
"I mean, if it's ok with your family, then yes, I'd love to join you. Thank you for the offer."
Amanda beamed wider than ever and stepped forwards before remembering where she was. Planting a kiss to Olivia's lips mere minutes after promising their captain their relationship wouldn't be obvious at work was a bad move. But it was certainly what Amanda wanted to do. And Olivia knew it, judging by the way her eyes darkened.
"I wish we weren't standing in a room with windows onto the bullpen right now," she murmured.
"Me neither," Amanda replied. "So let me just say that if we weren't, I'd be wrapping my arms around you right now and kissing you so hard you'd forget how to breathe."
Olivia let out a little chuckle. "Well, I'll just have to wait until our shift finishes I suppose."
"And we've got the holidays to make up for lost time," Amanda added. "I planned to fly down to Atlanta on Friday night. You're off then too, right?" Olivia nodded. "I'll book us both tickets then. Just four days. That ok?"
"Perfect, but only if your family is happy for me to come. I don't want to intrude on a family Christmas."
Amanda shook her head. "Don't be silly. You're my guest. The more the merrier anyway. My mama always cooks as if we're a family of eight anyway. I can't wait for you to try her pumpkin pie."
"I can't wait to see your home," Olivia replied.
"It's not much, but yeah, it's home."
"It's where you were from, Amanda. It's where you grew into the woman you are today. It's everything you are and that means I want to know everything about it. I want to understand where you came from, why you're the person you became, the person I ... I want to know everything, Amanda."
A/N: The next chapter will be the last chapter and it'll hopefully be published on Christmas Day … if I have time to write it!