The English docks were bustling with more people than I'd ever seen in one place. Hundreds, thousands of people bustled around.
I stopped at the end of the gangplank, staring at the swirling crowd. Behind me, people pushed and shoved.
"Hurry up!" Yells Sean, angrily, "We don't have all day!"
I look back at him, and then at England, who's ahead of me. He looks infinitely more relaxed now that he's on his own land.
He smiles encouragingly at me, "Don't worry, everyone gets nervous when they first leave their own countries."
They do?
He leans forward and grabs my hand, pulling me gently towards the dock, "It's okay, Terra, you'll be fine."
I take a step forward but freeze before I step onto the docks. I can feel the presence of England's land ahead of me.
It's not welcoming like Father's land. It's smaller, I can tell that much, but it's so much fuller. Every inch of soil is overflowing with stories.
England tugs gently on my hand, "Come on, Terra, it won't hurt you."
I take my first step onto English soil.
My first impression is how busy it is. Thousands of feet tramp on the land, and I feel every one. There's so much noise, and it's not at all like back home.
At home it's all harmonious, and I know the song so well I can sing along. The kookaburras and magpies sing, the kangaroos drum the ground, and the leaves rustle.
Even the people are in harmony, fitting perfectly in the system. They only take what they need, and give as much as they take.
Here, it's all discordant, and out of rhythm. Somewhere an animal squeals, as it's life's cut short. The sound echoes, joining with the thousands of other animals. How can one place need so much meat?
The people stomp the ground to dust, killing it slowly. I feel every step like a knife to my heart. It hurts... I try and break the connection with the land, but it refuses, pushing even more sensations onto me.
A woman screams...
A man swears...
Rats scurry through holes far below the ground...
A man's being killed in an alleyway, his lifeblood spilling to the ground...
England pulls me out of the way as the rest of the crew tramp off the gangplank. He draws me to his chest, letting me listen to his heartbeat, "Shhh, it's okay... I know it's overwhelming now, but it'll get better, I promise."
I can't believe that it'll get better. How does he cope with all these feelings?
"Terra, just focus on my voice, it's okay, just let the feelings subside... ignore the people and connect to the land itself..."
I take a deep breath and try and connect again. The land is still overflowing with people but I ignore them, and push past the human sounds.
Under the ground I feel animals, and shovels hitting the earth. A wooden box hits the ground and I feel so much sadness around it...
The earth is overflowing with bodies!They're decomposing and staining the earth with their rot. I can feel their blood and bile all around.
The entire land is saturated in blood and death. It's sticky, and stains my mind. So many people have died here, and they all left their mark.
A man being hit in the head with a rock...
A woman drowning in a bog...
A child falling to the ground, it's head rolling towards me...
A deafening bang and a man is hit with a round rock the size of his head. It goes straight through his abdomen, his insides painting the men behind him...
A woman screaming as she burns alive, "Dear sweet God, you have been with me always, be with me now through the darkness! I never meant to hurt anyone. Let none be hurt for me!" The flames lick hungrily at her hem, charring her legs, and she lets out one final shriek, "Long Live France!"...
I pull myself back into my mind, shaking like a leaf. I clutch England's coat, "Why is th-there so much blood?..."
He shakes his head, humming softly, "You saw blood?"
I nod, still clutching his coat, "Th-there was a man and he was hit in the head, and then there was a woman drowning in the bog and a child without a head..."
I cut myself off, burying my face in his shirt. He smells of salt and sweat, but it's better than the rusty smell of blood.
He gasps, clutching me close, "You saw all that?"
I peek up at him, noting the way his thick eyebrows are creased in horror, "Was I not supposed to?"
He looks down at me, "No... but none of my other colonies have ever seen those before."
"Does that mean that I...?" I don't know the English word for what I want to say, "Did I do something wrong?"
He shakes his head, and presses a kiss to my forehead, "No, Terra, you did nothing wrong. You're just unusual." He wraps his arms around me, squeezing softly.
He isn't as good at hugging me as Father, but it's still nice. I wonder how France will hug me. England said that he was the best hugger...
Wait. The burning lady was screaming France's name as she burned. Something about her wanting him to live for a long time. Why would she do that?
"England," I ask, looking up at him, "Why was the lady burning?"
"What lady?" He asks.
"She was one of the land's memories. She was burning and screaming something about wanting France to live for a long time."
England gasps, going as white as sea foam, "What did you see?" He grips my shoulders tightly, "Tell me exactly what you saw."
"Umm... she was tied to a pole... like a mast, and she was screaming."
"What did she say?" Asks England, knuckles turning white as he grips my shoulders.
"Dear God, you've been with me always... I don't remember this part, and then she said 'with me through the darkness. I have hurt none, and let none hurt for me? And then she yelled, Long Live France."
He gasps, hands gripping even tighter, "Jeanne."
"Huh?" My shoulders are going to bruise if he doesn't let go, "Who's Jeanne?" I stumble slightly over the unfamiliar name.
"Jeanne was my greatest mistake, and France's greatest love." He says, his eyes going the same way that Father's used to when he talked about the Bunyip.
I wriggle against him, trying to get him to let me go. His hands go slack, and I extract myself from his grip. He stays bent over, and staring at nothing.
I tug at his coat, "England, are you okay?"
He finally snaps out of his daze, straightening up and brushing off his clothes, "Yes. Of course I am."
He doesn't sound okay.
He grabs my hand and leads me down the street to where a carriage is waiting. He opens the door for me and lifts me up into the carriage. I arrange myself on the seats, which are far too soft for my liking, and wait for him to sit.
The coachman flicks his whip against the horse's flank - a barbaric practise I can't stand - and we set off.
Once the sounds of the docks fade, England rests his hand on my knee, leaning in close, "Terra, I need you to promise me something."
"What?"
"Don't tell France what you saw." He's deadly serious, "Don't say anything about Jeanne, or burning women, or anything."
"Why can't I tell him?"
England stares out the window at the busy streets, "Jeanne... Jeanne was France's greatest love. Until I killed her... and France never forgave me for it. We get along okay now... but if you bring it up it will dredge up bad feelings."
"But won't lying to him bring up bad feelings too?"
He looks at me with sad eyes, "Terra, there are many things you have yet to understand. One of those things is that sometimes you have to do bad things for good reasons."
He's right; I don't understand. "But won't he get mad if he finds out you lied to him?"
England shakes his head, "What he doesn't know won't hurt him. So don't tell him."
Scared of what he might do if he gets mad, I stop questioning him, and stare out the window.
—-
Author's Note: There are various accounts of what Joan of Arc said as she died. The quote; "Dear sweet God, you have been with me always, be with me now through the darkness. I never meant to hurt anyone. Let none be hurt for me." Is from the 1948 movie Joan of Arc starring Ingrid Bergman.
Most accounts seem to agree that she shouted Jesus' name as she burned, though the amount of times is unclear. However, I have decided instead to have her shout "Long Live France" as that felt more patriotic. And Joan, no matter you think of her, was undoubtably loyal to France.
Also, I needed to have her shout France's name so I had a reason for Australia to bring it up to England. Yay for angst!