This chapter is sooooo long...and I just stayed up all night to finish it. I'm not joking, the sun's streaming through the blinds right now...uhg...

Enjoy (ish, this is a pretty sad/depressing/bittersweet chapter haha)

and the story part is 12,800 words, so its the longest chapter I've written too; purely original work.

You all. better. love. me.

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i want reviews on this chapter haha

Enjoy! (I'm gonna sleep half the day now...)

When Mara entered the building, it was shaking.

Never a good sign.

She raced up several flights of stairs, keeping her eyes peeled for Luke. His emotional turmoil was too strong for her to keep herself open to the Force; she felt like if she opened herself up to it, she would get swept away and swallowed whole by his raging emotions. Eventually she came to a flight of stairs where the Force Wind was violent, and she was hardly able to push through. Step by step she pushed through the gale to the floor that housed the source of the violent wind, on her hands and knees by the time she crested the stairs to the level she wanted to be. Her eyes immediately fell upon a terrified brunette boy, and her heart ached sympathetically for the child.

Slowly, Mara made her way over to the young boy, putting a comforting hand on his shoulder. "What happened?" she asked him, shouting to be heard over the roaring winds.

The boy shook his head, covering his ears with his hands. "I don't know," the boy shouted, trying to be heard over the wind. "He rescued me, but someone got hurt, and he got really upset..."

"Is he in there?" Mara asked, doing her best to keep her voice even as she gestured to the room whose door was right next to the small boy. The boy nodded, and Mara didn't wait for anything more. "Stay here," she said sternly, already forcing herself forward into the room. The winds here were so strong, for a moment she wasn't sure that she would manage to even make it past the threshold.

Inside, it was as if chaos had found its center.

The wind whipped around in a dizzying fury, such that Mara had to call upon the Force simply to keep herself in place. Charred debris flew recklessly around the room, and the roaring of the wind was so loud Mara felt as if she would go deaf from being too close to the eye of the storm. When she saw just what lay at the center, though, she knew she could not stay away.

Luke sat in the center of the room, his shoulders shaking violently as he rocked back and forth, clutching a limp form as close to his body as possible. Mara recognized the boots, saw the gray lekkus dangling past Luke's arm, and her heart clenched so painfully she felt as if it would collapse into itself.

Mara gradually pushed her way forward into the room, approaching Luke centimeter by centimeter. Every movement closer to him got steadily harder, until Mara was curled up behind him, braced against the wind in an effort simply to stay grounded and keep from being swept up in the gale. Her hair whipped around her face, blinding her; but she didn't need to see. Gritting her teeth, Mara forced herself to reach out and grasp Luke's shoulder, pulling herself even with the sandy-blonde haired man.

Luke jerked at the contact, but he did not pull away from the figure in his arms. Now, Mara was close enough to see that Jeza was in fact not breathing, her eyes closed so it looked like she was forever in a deep slumber, her mouth curled into a faint, last smile. The sound of Luke's sobbing was drowned out by the wind, but Mara could feel and see his shoulders trembling violently, up and down, wracked with immeasurable grief. His face was buried into Jeza's lean form, completely obscured from sight by both the girl's body and his own mop of hair. Slowly, his head shook back and forth in a sign of denial, rejection, and loss, his hands clenching, unclenching, and re-clenching in the fabric of her clothes. Mara felt tears of her own spring to her eyes and spill over at the sight of his devastation, and she gently moved her hands so that they were tenderly grasping his shoulders. She didn't pull him away from Jeza's body; she was positive that would only set him off. Instead, she pulled herself as close as she could to him and rested her face in his neck, her arms squeezing slightly in a hesitant embrace from behind as she gently rubbed his shoulders. She was close enough now to hear his broken sobs and to hear that there were words to go with his trembling and frame-wracking sobs.

"I'm so sorry Jeza...I'm sorry...I failed you...please, let this just be some horrid nightmare...this can't be real...Jeza, please...I love you..." Luke whispered to himself in between his sobs. He seemed closed off to and isolated from the world around him, unaware of the carnage that he was causing all around in his grief stricken state; Mara doubted he would even care.

Mara squeezed her eyes shut, some of her tears leaking down Luke's neck. "Oh, Luke..." she whispered, her voice warped by her deep set sympathy for him and the pain it caused her to see this. Luke shuddered at the sound of her voice and finally reacted to her touch, slowly lifting his face up and away from Jeza's body. Mara sucked in a breath at the sight of the smeared, tear-streaked face, covered in a mixture of dry and wet-smudged ash, his eyes still a vivid bright blue but full of an agony that rivaled the pain of over five years ago when she'd betrayed him on Byss. His lips were swollen from where he'd probably pressed his lips against Jeza's face and head repeatedly in his grief-stricken state. Out of the corner of her eye, Mara could now see the charred hole in the girl's abdomen; the sign of a lightsaber wound. Luke made a strange sound, like a wild animal caught in a deadly trap it knew it couldn't escape from.

"Mara," he partially whispered, half-sobbed, his voice cracking after the first syllable. Fresh tears spilled over and tracked new trails down his ash-covered face as he sucked in rattling breaths with such effort Mara was sure that breathing had begun to pain him. "Sh-she..."

"Shh," Mara said gently, placing a hand on his cheek and tenderly brushing her thumb along the length of his cheekbone. "You don't have to say it," she told him softly, brushing away several more tears that fell from his eyes. To her relief, the gale started to calm around her as she did her best to ease his grief and turn his mind away from it.

"He killed her," Luke snarled, his voice coming out strange as it was still warped with grief and tears. "He waited till I was somewhere else, helping someone else, and he killed her!"

Luke curled into himself as he shouted the last part, angling his head back into Jeza's body, and somewhere in the building there was a thundering crack followed by the sounds of something very large crashing. He didn't even seem to notice, his gaze hardened with a look Mara had hoped she wouldn't see in his eyes again as he turned his eyes back up towards her. The hard, vengeance-and-blood-thirsting look melted away into broken defeat as he held Mara's sorrowful gaze.

"It's my fault," he croaked, tears flowing freely down his face as he turned away again to bury his face in Jeza's neck. "I shouldn't have left her, it's my fault she's d...my fault sh-she's...gone."

"Luke, it's not your fault," Mara told him quietly, threading her fingers through his hair comfortingly. Luke gave a shuddering hiccup of a sob, shaking his head.

"Yes, it is," he sobbed.

"Luke Skywalker, look at me..." Mara said desperately, leaning in close to his ash-covered face. "None of this is your fault. If anyone carries the blame it's Judro," she said passionately, disturbed by the dark look that flickered across his features at the name. It was gone just as soon as it appeared, he was so emotionally unstable. Mara glanced out at the flaming world of Alderaan, noting that the flames were too close.

"Oh, Luke," she murmured, turning her attention back to him and resting a hand on his cheek once again, her forehead pressed against his. "You've gone through so much more than any man should...Please don't do this to yourself; you know Jeza wouldn't want it. But you have to let her go; you know you do. It wasn't that long ago you were telling some other people you hold dear the same thing. You know..."

Luke shook his head, but this time buried his face in Mara's shoulder. "I can't...I can't, Mara. I-it took her dying in my arms for me to a-accept her calling me father, a-and to finally tell her...tell her that I loved her. Why didn't I before? Why did I have to wait until it was too late?"

Mara gently cradled his head to her shoulder, running her fingers through his sandy mop and letting him cry as much as he needed to while tears of her own fell upon his head. She faintly heard her com going off, but ignored it. Around them, the Force Wind was finally calming and coming to a gradual end as Luke let everything out, turning into Mara's arms for comfort and some form of reprieve. His body shuddered against her chest, her shirt now damp from the tears he had shed in a matter of seconds. She gently rocked Luke back and forth, making soothing noises low in her throat and holding him as tightly to her form as she could with Jeza's body still in his arms.

Somewhere in the room Luke's discarded com buzzed a shrill whine, but they both ignored it. A chunk of the ceiling fell in a few paces from them; Luke remained unfazed, but Mara was done hanging around.

"We have to go; the flames are too close now and the building's crumbling around us. We've run out of time," Mara said in a firm yet gentle tone of voice.

"I won't leave her," Luke forced out, pulling away sharply.

"I never said you had to," Mara replied gently, giving him a tender kiss on the cheek before she stood up. "I'll go get your little charge."

Luke jerked again like he'd been shocked, and a fresh wave of guilt—a different kind of guilt this time—washed over him. "I forgot about Zane," he murmured, turning back to Jeza. He seemed loath to move, and when he gathered her up in his arms to carry her out, he was deliberately slow and took his time. Before he left the room, however, he looked around, a light of fear in his eyes. "Wait; where's R2?"

A shrill whistle came from the barred closet, and Mara closed the distance in four quick strides, hefting the large beam aside so that the astromech could wheel out of the room with several grateful yet sad chirps. Luke had a strange look on his face, and he was clutching Jeza a little tighter to him.

"She must have hid him before Judro attacked her," Luke murmured. R2 wheeled up beside Luke, bumping into his leg with a low, sad whir. He gave the astromech a small, broken smile. "I'm glad you're safe R2," he whispered.

Mara's com continued to go off, and she continued to ignore it. "I'm sure that's the Falcon; we've spent all the time we can here. We need to go now."

"I'm coming," Luke assured her, though Mara didn't miss how his pace was slower than normal, and grief still clung to him as much as the dark side once had. Mara shivered at the thought, and re-entered the hall where the boy—Zane—was waiting for them. Hesitantly and wordlessly, the boy attached himself to Luke's leg. "Don't worry...I'm sure your mother's still outside waiting for you."

Mara's step faltered slightly. "Oh, the woman outside was his mother?" she asked in surprise. Luke nodded in confirmation. "I sent her ahead to the Falcon before I came in. She was so grief stricken; I think she thought you two had been killed..." Mara said slowly, talking as if her words could set Luke off again; she wouldn't be surprised if they did.

Luke's face became stoic, a sure sign that he was attempting to hide his reaction. There were cracks in his normally perfect mask though, and Mara felt bad for bringing the pain back already as he winced. "Then we better hurry back," Luke said softly. "Mara, can you carry Zane so we can move faster?"

"Of course," Mara said softly, kneeling down to pick the small child up and letting the little boy bury his face in her shoulder. Luke cradled Jeza's body closer, giving her a kiss on the forehead before he nodded slowly, his gaze never leaving Jeza's limp form.

"Let's go."

"Try her again!"

"She's not answering, all right? I can't help that! Maybe she just can't reach it at the moment."

"Han, something happened to Luke; I need to know that he's all right, but neither of them are answering!"

"Leia, please; you know Luke and Mara. They'll show up, I know they will."

"I know how they are Han, but something—"

"If something did go wrong, then they will find a way around it. They will be here Leia, I promise."

"Han...we're running out of time; we've got all these people on board, even more trying to force their way past Chewie..."

Han stood up from his pilot seat, resting his hands on his fiancé's shoulders. "He will be fine Leia. And we'll wait here for them until we can't wait any longer. I'm not about to leave Luke either."

Leia sighed, allowing herself to be drawn into Han's embrace and burying her face in his chest to hide the tears that made it past their defenses for Luke and for the burning Alderaan they were being forced to leave behind. Han felt deeply for her; she was seeing the planet destroyed a second time, and up close this time too.

After several moments of Han cradling Leia's slightly shaking form to himself, nervously watching the flames get steadily closer outside of the cockpit, Han's com went off. Leia snatched the device off of Han's belt before he could even reach for it; her and those Jedi reflexes...

Chewbacca's growls and roars reached them before Leia even said who was answering. Immediately Han crumpled in relief when he heard what his friend had to say. "You see them? Good, make sure they get through and onto the ship, then we're out of here," Han said tersely. "I'm glad we managed to keep enough room for Luke, Mara, and Jeza; barely, but still."

Leia handed the com link to him, already turning in a flash of brown and white to leave the cockpit. "I'm going to go see him and find out what happened."

"I'll catch up to you whenever we're in hyperspace," Han called to her retreating back even when it disappeared around the corner halfway through his sentence. He turned back to the controls and waited a full minute before he started to lift off the ground. When he received no protest over his com, he continued with the departure from the planet. "Let's get out of here," he murmured to no one in particular, angling the ship away from the burning surface of Alderaan.

It was hard to push past the crowd of people that were still trying to find a spot to get comfortable on the Falcon, but Leia managed to struggle past the worst of the crowd so she could approach the landing ramp. The first thing she noticed was that Chewbacca wasn't making a sound; something that worried her immensely. The next thing she realized was that Mara was in front with R2 at her side, her shirt soaked in some strategic spots, and ash speckling her face. Her eyes were red, like she had been crying.

As soon as Mara caught sight of Leia swiftly approaching, Mara stepped right into her path and opened her arms to restrain her, holding her back. Leia felt an immediate flash of indignation and hurt at the action, shooting the red-head an annoyed look. "Mara, please move, I have to see Luke," Leia said firmly.

Mara solemnly shook her head. "No, not right now, he...he needs some space."

Leia froze at her tone of voice. "Mara, what..."

She trailed off as over Mara's shoulder, just as the Falcon started to rise off the ground, Luke appeared, Chewbacca closely behind him. Leia didn't register Chewbacca lowering the ramp, though she did hear the Wookiee's mournful howl, the little brunette boy practically attached to her brother's leg, and...and...

Leia let out a small, quiet exclamation of surprise and horrible understanding as she set eyes upon her brother, taking in his ash-covered, tear-streaked face, the sag in his shoulders, the slow, almost forced forward pace he moved with, and the body he held in his arms, clutched lovingly and sorrowfully to his chest, his eyes never moving from the peaceful features as he moved by memory through the Falcon. Leia stared mutely at the scene, the sudden grief and sympathy she felt for her brother swelling far beyond words as she let Mara pull her back away from him. When Mara spoke, her voice trembled.

"He...he needs some time," Mara stated weakly. "Judro...Luke went to go rescue that little boy, and while he was gone...Judro came and..."

Tears filled Leia's eyes as she realized just what she had felt earlier. "Force...why her? Why him?" she asked no one in particular.

Mara sighed, looking back in the direction Luke had disappeared, most likely to the bunk room he and Jeza had picked out for the trip back to Coruscant that was going to be untouched by the people they evacuated. "He just needs his space right now, I mean..." she trailed off and shook her head, looking down at the ground.

"I think this might have been too much for him," Mara whispered.

Luke didn't really remember much of the trip to the Falcon; he hardly even registered anything as he boarded. He just knew he felt hallow, numb, and devoid of...well...anything. He couldn't take his face away from Jeza's, knowing that eventually he was going to have to tear himself from her side. He didn't want to, and his heart—or what was left of it—twisted painfully at the thought. He found himself at the bunk room he was supposed to share with Jeza too soon, slowly getting down on one knee so he could situate the girl onto the bottom bunk, folding her hands together over the lightsaber wound so that it looked like she was asleep. Gently, he brushed the tips of his fingers against her cheek, another sob bursting out of him. As it echoed around the room, he couldn't help but notice that it was the sound of a broken man. He would know; he'd been broken before.

Behind him, Zane stood quietly in the doorway, waiting for him. Once more, Luke nearly forgot that Zane was there before he managed to scrounge up enough strength to pull himself away from Jeza's side and come to the boy's side. Gently, Luke reached down and picked the boy up. "Come on...let's go find your mother," Luke said, his tone empty. Somehow, leaving Jeza's side, leaving her in the bunk, made him feel even more broken then he already was.

Luke wound his way through the Falcon's corridors towards the cargo hold—which had been cleared and filled with blankets, pillows, and the sort for the rescued—where he was sure that Aama, Zane's mother, would be. As soon as Luke was sure Zane was back with his mother, Luke would retreat back into the bunk and back into his grief.

The cargo hold was packed with all sorts of people, and Zane and Luke scanned the room; Zane had a much hungrier, needful look on his face as he looked for his mother, while Luke's expression was understandably rather half-hearted.

Suddenly, Zane perked up in Luke's arms. "Mommy?" he called, his eyes riveted somewhere in the room. Luke followed Zane's gaze, and sure enough, there was Aama, her head whipping around at the sound of her little boy's voice. Luke sat Zane down so that Zane could rush into his mother's waiting arms, watching from a distance as mother and son shared a tearful reunion.

"Oh, Zane, I thought I'd lost you," Aama wept, clutching her little boy as close to her as physically possible.

"I was so scarred Mommy," Zane whispered.

"I know baby, I know," Aama said in a soothing tone of voice, tears leaking from her closed eyes. "You're safe now though, I promise."

Zane nodded. "No thanks to Luke."

Aama pulled away with a frown. "Luke? Luke who baby?"

Zane turned to look at Luke, a small smile on his innocent face. "That Luke; the man who saved me."

Luke cast his gaze and head down as Aama looked his way; he was in no state for this. He didn't think he could take the thank you he was sure he was about to receive...

Aama approached him, oozing fervent gratitude through the Force. "I cannot thank you enough for saving my little boy..." she started to say, but when Luke looked up and she caught sight of his face for the first time, her whole demeanor changed as shock and recognition flashed through her, followed closely by potent anger and hate.

Luke tensed on instinct, completely confused by her reaction for only several heartbeats.

"You!" she breathed before her hand shot out and smacked Luke across the face—hard. Luke's head snapped to the side, and he could taste blood on his lips. All around, people stared in shock at the unexpected turn of events, and further surprise that Luke did not react to the abuse. He took it wordlessly and without complain, like a kicked pup that was used to being abused or just didn't care anymore.

"I thought you were exiled!" Aama exclaimed while Luke licked the blood from his lips; a useless endeavor, as he simply continued to bleed. Zane stood in confusion between his mother and rescuer as Aama worked herself up to a fury. "I was watching the news that day, I saw you put on the ship—how are you here?"

Luke didn't offer her much of an answer. "I...received a pardon..." he whispered.

"Why would they give a monster like you a pardon?" Aama all but shrieked, and Luke momentarily recoiled before just standing there and letting her shout at him. "You took my daughter away from me!"

Luke stopped breathing, and his eyes misted over as he felt as if the galaxy was pressing down on his heart. "I-I-I'm so sor...sorry," Luke managed to force out. Aama let out a harsh laugh.

"Sorry? You're sorry? Sorry won't bring my daughter back! You'd have to know what it feels like to be sorry, and you don't! You know nothing of the loss that I went through because of you! I don't care what you did to receive your precious pardon, because I see what you truly are, and you will never redeem yourself in the eyes of those whose lives you've destroyed!"

With that, Aama grabbed her little boy's wrist and pulled Zane as far away from Luke as possible. Luke stood there in shock, feeling the blade of her words twist and cut him to his already damaged heart and soul with devastating force. He stood there for several long moments, uncaring of the stares he was receiving as hot tears welled in his eyes and burned their way down his cheeks. With the gasp of a suffocating man, Luke turned on his heel and left the cargo hold as fast as humanly possible.

He didn't remember finding his way back to the bunk room, and he didn't remember sinking beside Jeza's bed. All he remembered was holding her unresponsive hand tightly in his own, sobbing uncontrollably and earnestly wishing to die before unconsciousness took him and he sank into dark, unfeeling nothing.

Mara had seen the ordeal with Aama, but had been stuck applying pressure to a nicked artery and had been unable to make her way to Luke. As soon as she was able to find someone else to take her spot applying the much needed pressure, Luke was gone, but she made her way over to Aama, a fresh fury alight in her eyes.

Aama sat in a corner, holding Zane close to her in a possessively protective embrace, a faraway look in the woman's eyes. Mara stormed up to her, determined to give the woman a piece of her mind to put the woman back in her place before Mara went looking for Luke.

"What's wrong with you?" she growled at the woman once she was toe to toe with her, glaring down at the woman. Aama stared up at her blankly.

"What are you talking about?" Aama asked with the audacity to sound offended. Mara growled and stepped a little closer.

"Luke," Mara snarled. "That's what I'm talking about. He just saved your boy's life, and that's how you thank him?"

"He doesn't deserve my thanks," Aama shot back, rising angrily to her feet. "What he deserves is to rot in a cell, or better yet be put to death for all the families he's destroyed."

It took a great deal of strength for Mara not to punch the woman so hard she'd be knocked out, her sole restraint being the fact that Zane was attached to his mother's leg.

"Didn't you see the look on his face? In his eyes? He's not the man that killed your daughter, and he's completely repentant of what he did five years ago. He knows what it's like—" Mara started to say in a forcibly calm tone, trying to retain some sliver of decency in the conversation.

"He knows nothing of the pain he put this family through," Aama said hotly, but Mara cut her off with a shout that rang through the entire cargo hold and made everyone go silent.

"He just lost his daughter not even an hour ago! Not even an hour!" Mara shouted in Aama's face. "She was murdered just because she called him Father. And you have the audacity to say—"

Mara broke off with a frustrated cry, turning away for a moment. "That girl was his entire world; and she was just murdered in cold blood while he went to save your son, simply because she was associated with him. Don't you dare try and say that he doesn't know, that he doesn't understand, that he doesn't feel; he knows all too well what it's like."

Mara didn't even wait for a response. Instead, she forced her way out of the cargo bay and charged onwards to Luke's room. How had all of this happened? Just a few hours ago they had all been happy, together, laughing, whole; now...

Mara stopped outside the door, leaning her head on the cool metal and taking several deep breaths to calm herself before she walked inside, bracing herself for whatever lay beyond.

When she saw Luke lying unmoving on the floor, she felt pure panic and fear race through her, immediately assuming the worst. When she knelt down beside his form, though, she saw that he was breathing, and was immediately cured of her worst fear. Fresh tear trails were on his face, blood was still trickling across his mouth, and his hand was loosely intertwined with Jeza's; a sight that broke Mara's heart. She tenderly wiped the blood from his lips and then slowly gathered Luke's lean and powerful form into her arms with some help from the Force and lifted him up into his bunk, crying silently and openly for him the entire time. Instead of just leaving him in there all alone, however, Mara crawled up onto the bunk with him, holding him close to her in comfort when she lay down beside him, head resting lightly on his chest and an arm around his middle. She wanted to take all the pain he was feeling away from him, but she didn't know how.

"Oh, Luke," she whispered into his chest. "Don't give up on us...you're not alone. Just hold on, and things will be made right again; I promise. I would know...I've seen it before."

Leia re-appeared in the cockpit a few moments after they'd jumped to hyperspace, just as Han was getting ready to leave. It was strange that Chewie hadn't come to the cockpit as soon as he was on-board, but Han figured he was busy fixing something or whatnot. Han checked the navi computer one last time, hearing Leia's footsteps behind him.

"Hey, I sent Anakin a transmission so he'd know we all made it out safely; the others and he will meet us at the Temple hangar. Are the kids all settled?" he asked. When she didn't respond he frowned and turned around to face her. "Leia?"

He was startled to find her still standing in the doorway, crying. She took a ragged breath. "Han..."

He was across the cockpit in a second, pulling her into his arms. "Leia...what's wrong? What happened?" he asked in shock. "Is the Kid all right?"

Leia shook her head avidly against his chest. "N-no Han, he's not."

He felt like ice had been poured down his back, and he instinctively held Leia a little tighter. "What happened?" he asked, his tone strained with worry.

"Judro killed her Han," Leia whispered, and Han stiffened.

"Mara?" Han asked. Leia shook her head and Han sucked in a sharp breath. "Jeza?" he asked, his voice tight. Leia nodded in confirmation, a new sob escaping her.

"You should have seen him Han! I-I haven't ever seen him like that...maybe, maybe back on Byss but..." she trailed off, crying softly into Han's shirt.

Han swore under his breath, rocking Leia back and forth soothingly while he gently rubbed her back. "Kriff...why did it have to be her?" he murmured to no one in particular. His heart went out to his future brother-in-law and he closed his eyes, allowing Leia to cry into his chest until she was all right again. Leia hiccupped a little.

"I knew something was wrong Han, I knew something terrible happened, but I would have never guessed..." she trailed off.

"No one could have seen this...even with those Jedi Magic Tricks of yours," Han murmured into her ear. Leia pulled away, trying to straighten herself out.

"I need to contact Father...a-and tell him...tell him what's happened."

Han shook his head. "I'm afraid that will have to wait until we land; the communications system kind of...exploded on the way out."

Leia gave an exasperated sigh. "Of all the times for your ship to fall apart Han!"

"Hey, it's not her fault," Han said, patting the controls affectionately before he sobered again. "We'll just have to try and get off the ship first to tell Anakin so that it's not...as much of a shock."

Leia chewed on her fingernails—something rather out of character for her. "Han...I'm scared of what's going to happen to Luke...what this will do to him..."

"The kid's tough he'll...he'll be all right," Han said, cursing himself silently for the unsure note in his tone.

"You didn't see him Han," Leia whispered. "You didn't feel...a mere shadow of what he felt when she died."

"This line of thinking isn't going to help any," Han pointed out, gently caressing her cheek with his thumb. "Right now, he needs his space, but we'll all make sure that he knows we're here for him,and that he still has a loving family when he needs us, all right?"

"Hold me," Leia whispered, wrapping her arms tightly around Han. He didn't say anything, simply wrapped his arms around Leia in response and gently patted her back in comfort.

"He'll be all right Leia...you'll see."

The starfighters were the first to arrive at the Temple, where Padme was waiting anxiously for the news of what had happened. She was quick to inform Anakin that the Organa's had made it out safely, and Anakin grimly informed her that they had managed to drive Judro's forces back, but there was already so much damage to the planet it would be a miracle if enough of it survived for Alderaan to continue to be habitable. She asked about the others, and for the first time, Anakin hesitated.

"What? Anakin, what is it?" Padme asked fearfully. Off to the side, Galen and Juno approached from where they had landed the Rogue Shadow during Anakin and Padme's solemn conversation.

"Han...says that they're all fine, but there was an...incident. I don't know what, but...something happened with Luke," Anakin said slowly.

"I felt it too; on the other side of the planet," Galen chipped in as he came to stand beside Obi-Wan and Ahsoka a few paces away from Anakin and Padme. "Did they not contact you to explain?"

Anakin shook his head. "I don't think Han knew either; he just said Chewie had said he'd seen them and they were leaving. Nothing more. They might not have even reached the ship yet when he contacted me. Did they contact you?"

Galen snorted. "If they didn't contact you, they didn't contact me."

"What kind of incident, Anakin?" Padme asked, her tone somewhat sharp as she called her husband's attention back to her. Anakin chewed on the inside of his cheek, trying to think of a way to gently explain it and not get Padme too worried.

"There was...a very strong sense of pain and anger that we could sense from him through the Force," Anakin explained slowly, all the while thinking how pain and anger was an understatement. He looked up at the sky, sensing familiar presences enter the system. "None of us know what happened, but I'm sure we'll know when they touch down. They're in the system, they should be here any moment now."

Padme's forehead was creased with worry, her mouth curled into a concerned frown. "Anakin..."

Anakin sighed, pulling his wife into his arms. "What matters Padme, is that they're safe. Whatever happened, we'll work our way through it, like we always do."

Padme didn't argue, leaning lovingly into Anakin's embrace while they waited patiently for the Falcon to arrive. Anakin met the other's gazes over Padme's shoulder, a silent understanding passing between Obi-Wan and Anakin. The two elder Jedi were almost positive that something unexpected and possibly tragic was going to greet them, though they had no idea what that was going to be. Still, Anakin wanted to keep the hope and relative calm alive as long as possible before whatever revelation the Falcon held was dropped on them all.

Finally, the familiar ship appeared on the horizon, and the small group shuffled off to the side to allow the relief team in the hangar to escort the battered and emotionally strained refugees to safety. Chewbacca stood at the bottom of the ramp, helping some of the weaker beings on their way down and handing them off to the Padawans that were assisting with the relief effort before he moved onto the next. Anakin sagged in obvious relief when he saw Leia and Han take up the rear of the group, Leia's eyes doing a quick sweep of the room around her. When her gaze landed on her parents off to the side, Anakin immediately knew that something was terribly wrong. It was in her red eyes, and the way that the air suddenly seemed thick with sorrow. Even the assisting Jedi who weren't attached to the Skywalkers could sense it, though not nearly as strongly as the group that shared such deep bonds.

Leia rushed towards Anakin, throwing her arms around his neck as soon as she was within reach. "Daddy," she whispered into his chest, trembling.

Yes, something was horribly wrong.

"Leia, Princess, what's wrong? What happened?" Anakin asked in worry, tipping his daughter's head up to search her chocolate gaze. A tear slipped out of her eyes. "Where's your brother; is he all right?"

Leia's bottom lip trembled. "Father...it's Jeza," she whispered, causing Anakin's heart to clench in fearful anticipation. "She..."

Leia didn't get to say much more, because at that moment several gasps went through their small group, and Anakin heard the tears that warped Padme's voice. Looking up sharply, he saw a sight that he knew would be burned into his mind forever.

The first thing he thought of was when he was twenty, all the way back to when he'd gone to Tatooine...and his mother had died in his arms...and he'd carried her in his arms back to the Lars' to be buried...

Luke was slowly descending the Falcon's ramp, Jeza held in his arms the same way Anakin had held his mother in his arms that dreaded day, staring unseeing in front of him as he walked mechanically forward. Anakin involuntarily shivered at how cold and...empty his son felt at the moment and he took a step towards the young man, noting there were unshed tears in Luke's eyes and that he was still filthy and covered in ash from the burning planet. Mara Jade stayed firmly by Luke's side, and it seemed almost as if she was guiding him along, coaxing him forward and getting him to keep putting one foot in front of another.

Something about the sight stopped him. He remembered how he had felt when his mother had died. He'd been torn between wanting to be left alone and wanting to be held, but no comfort in the world could provide what he needed. Some little part of him whispered that Luke needed to be left alone, that Mara was the one that Luke needed to be with at the moment. Anakin would have his opportunity to be there for his son, but right now...right now Luke needed space, and the woman that was able to keep him moving even now.

Padme also took a step towards her son, looking ready to fly into full mother mode, but Anakin stopped her, pulling her into his arms. "Give him time..." Anakin murmured, his voice dripping with raw emotion. "Just...let him have his space..."

The relief team and the refugees stared as Luke and Mara went by, and not a word was said in the hangar. Anakin held Padme close to him as she cried into his chest, and Anakin looked up at the sky, closing his eyes as the image of Luke smiling and happy again with Jeza on one side and Mara on the other came to the front of his mind.

Why do you do this to him, Anakin asked the Force in a bare mental whisper. Why have you taken his happiness from him yet again?

He didn't expect a whisper back, but he didn't like the answer he felt in his heart and mind either.

Patience...there is a reason for everything. All in time, it will make sense; her death was not without purpose.

The funeral was that night. It wasn't at the Jedi Temple, as Jeza was not Jedi and Luke wasn't a member of the Order. Still, with the many family connections they were able to pull enough strings to set up a quiet funeral in a small corner of Coruscant, where they were able to set up a funeral pyre for Jeza. Well, Luke was able to set up the pyre. He arrived long before anyone else, spending as much time with Jeza before she truly was gone as he could. No one had seen him since he'd departed from the Falcon other than Mara, who was almost constantly by his side. Apparently, he'd asked for the time constructing the pyre alone, and for some alone time with Jeza's body before the small funeral as well. Anakin had images of Luke, sobbing as he constructed a pyre of wood in a thinly forested area, hands trembling, a gray skinned twi'lek's body in the background...

There was quite a few people coming; the Organas, who were on Coruscant, were coming, of course the entire Skywalker family, Galen, Juno, Han, Chewie, Obi-Wan, Ahsoka, Kuroth, even Windu, Shaak Ti, and Aayla Secura came to pay their respects to the girl.

All thoughts left Anakin's mind as they finally came to the spot where the pyre was constructed. Luke stood, a single lone figure dressed in black, in front of the pyre, a lit torch stuck straight up in the ground at his feet. Jeza's body was already set up on the pyre, looking for all the world as if she was simply sleeping. One by one, everyone slowly approached.

Luke couldn't feel the cold wind around him, or really hear any of the animal life that made the sounds of nature around him. He could only see Jeza, his beloved daughter...in a place he had seen one too many loved ones, with a fate one too many people in his life had met as he said one too many goodbyes. He wasn't sure if he could even find it in himself to speak anymore. He'd poured out his heart and soul to the girl before everyone had arrived; he'd said his painful, agonizing goodbye, and he didn't have it in himself to speak anymore. He just felt...broken down and empty.

He sensed the others approaching, his vision blurry with more unshed tears. He felt estranged from the galaxy, separate from those around them, even as the familiar faces took varying spots around the pyre. No one said a word; there were no words to be said, as most of them were Force sensitive and could simply feel everything that had to be said. Also, it seemed everyone knew that Luke had already said his goodbyes and that, with as fragile as he was, he couldn't take one more in any shape or form.

His father appeared at his side first, and wordlessly pulled Luke in for a tight hug. Luke closed his eyes, letting his father's strong and steady embrace wash over him. It didn't do much to help the emptiness in his heart though, he was loath to admit. Anakin didn't seemed bothered by it though; he seemed to understand perfectly. Luke shook himself mentally. Of course Anakin understood; he'd lost Luke to the clutches of death twice—of course one he'd only thought he'd lost Luke, but that was beside the point.

His mother was right after Anakin, and she tenderly pulled Luke into her petit frame. Luke gratefully buried his face in her neck and hair, allowing his mother to gently rub his back and whisper words that normally soothed and comforted him. Once more, it didn't quite give Luke what he needed, and he began to wonder if anything could. Still, he was grateful towards her for trying, but that gratefulness was quickly squashed once more by the emptiness that had been his constant companion.

His sister and Han appeared next, with Leia pulling him close to her in a bone crushing embrace. Leia had always been a source of comfort for Luke, including in his worst moments like Bespin. But now, he couldn't even bring himself to give her the small reassuring smile he would give her even if things weren't all right. Han clasped him on the shoulder, giving him a brotherly squeeze before he allowed Leia to pull him elsewhere, and Han held Leia close to him while everyone waited for Luke to move forward. The torch crackled beside Luke while Luke stared at Jeza's body. He didn't think he could do this anymore; he didn't want to do this, he wasn't ready to say goodbye. Not now, and not ever. How many had he already lost? How many more did he have yet to lose? When would the Force finally decide that he had lost enough?

As these thoughts swirled in his mind, he didn't notice, but a strong gust started to pick up. Before it could reach the same intensity that it had back on Alderaan, however, gentle, loving hands ran up from the middle of his back and settled on his shoulders, drawing his attention away from the pyre in front of him and quelling the wind. Mara stood beside him, her hand trailing its way up the back of his neck and tenderly threading through his hair. Blazing blue eyes met emerald green eyes, and Luke felt completely exposed under her gaze; like he couldn't hide anything from her. Like she could somehow take what he felt from him. Of course she couldn't...but he liked to believe that she could.

Her eyes shone sadly, and the meaning in her gaze was clear and obvious. It's time, her eyes seemed to say. He gave the most imperceptible shake of the head that was only caught by a few onlookers, to which Mara's gaze softened even further and she nodded. She wiped a tear from his eyes before it could fall, disguising the action as a gentle caress of his cheek. Luke didn't want her to let go; he wanted her to stay, and he wanted Jeza to open her eyes and laugh, to call him Father again and ridicule him for being so reckless, or for getting lost in his thoughts again, or for worrying about her so much...

"Luke..." Mara whispered, and Luke knew he couldn't put it off any longer. Ever so slowly, he picked up the torch and hesitantly placed it to the pyre in front, watching as the flames ate at the wood before they reached Jeza's body. It was so final; new tears leaked out of Luke's eyes. Padme and Anakin were in each other's embrace, with both of them shedding tears. Leia had turned into Han's chest, unable to look as Jeza was surrounded by the flames. The Jedi Masters' eyes flickered from the burning pyre to Luke and Mara, though Luke ignored them. Kuroth stared mournfully into the fire and gave Luke several long, sympathetic looks. Chewbacca howled low sad notes to the sky. Galen held Juno in his arms, his gaze see-sawing between Luke and the pyre like Kuroth's gaze. Obi-Wan and Ahsoka stared solemnly into the flames for a long time before they turned pity-filled, sorrowful gazes onto Luke.

Luke's eyes never wavered from the flames. Mara leaned her head on his shoulder, and he found himself inclining his head just slightly to rest his head on top of hers, Mara's arm wrapped around his. They stayed like that for a long time. One by one, the attendants began to trickle away, leaving the family to grieve. Eventually they, too, left the pyre, giving Luke his space once more. Mara stayed with him for a long, long time until she picked up the sense that Luke wanted a little more space. She kissed him lightly on the cheek.

"I'll be by the speeder," she said softly, squeezing his hand before she turned and made her way in the general direction of the speeder that Luke had taken. He made no complaint.

Once she was out of sight, Luke sank to his knees beside the pyre from his crushing grief and sobbed, staying there until all that remained of the grand fire and burning pyre was burning embers. His throat raw and his body aching with the grief he was feeling, with no one else around to hear him but the Force itself, he simply whispered two words to the pyre.

"I promise..."

Several days passed. There weren't even any whispers of Judro in those days, and his fleet was mysteriously absent. Everyone seemed to be waiting in fearful anticipation of the moment when he would appear again and rain some new devastating terror down on the Republic. The planets that had joined Judro—especially after the Alderaan demonstration—had not shown any dissatisfaction though, so the Republic knew something was coming.

The war was just a little rain outside the window for the Skywalker family. All their concern was centered around Luke, who spent most of his time locked away in his room. The air all around felt as if there was a storm brewing, but they hadn't sensed anything that they were afraid they would. Darth Eius had not reappeared, though Luke's presence was...different, at the same time.

Mara went in often, as did Anakin, Leia, and Padme, though Mara was in there the most. They wanted to make sure he ate and that he was taking care of himself, hoping that he hadn't let himself go. Mara told them he had stopped crying; the weight of grief was still there, but not as prominently as it had been several days prior.

Today, four days after Jeza's passage, found Mara stretched out on Luke's bed, watching him sit on the ground and tweak his lightsaber in silence. He'd just come out of a deep meditation, and had gone straight to adjusting the weapon. Mara watched him closely, studying everything about him. After the funeral, Luke had developed a...stoic calmness to himself that left her on edge. He seemed perfectly serene on the surface, but below...it was like there was a constant fire of danger, like he was ready to lash out but had the control to wait for the right moment. A hidden danger, a sleeping dragon, a nexu waiting to pounce.

It was as alluring as it was frightening, and it was frightening because it was Luke. She didn't want him to cross back into the Darth Eius area either, and the danger that simmered underneath the surface worried her.

Luke finished tweaking his blade, nodding in satisfaction when the blade sprang to life without a problem. It might have just been her imagination, but Mara thought the blade looked a deeper, darker green than before. Stretching, Mara slid off the bed and approached him, her hands placed gently on his shoulder.

"Looks like it still works," Mara said with a small smile, placing a tender kiss on his cheek. Luke deactivated the blade and balanced the hilt in his palm.

"It should work better now," Luke murmured. He turned his head, giving her the faintest of smiles; it was better than nothing. Luke inclined his head, leaning forward to give her a slow, relished kiss on the lips. "I have to go now," he said once he'd pulled away, getting to his feet and grabbing his black cloak off of the bed. Mara frowned, standing up as well.

"Go? Where?" she asked curiously, her eyes studying his every movement. Luke paused, inclining his head slightly in the direction of the hallway.

"The Council summoned me, while you were helping my mother in the kitchen. They want to speak with me...and I them," he said, tagging the last line on with a low mutter.

"Can I come with you?" Mara asked before she could even think about what she'd just asked. Luke gave her a strange look.

"I don't know if they'd allow you to," he said doubtfully. "It's the Council we're talking about, and I don't think they'll see a reason for you to come...especially since you left the Order."

Mara arched a challenging eyebrow. "If I want to come, I'll come; and I'd like to see them try to stop me."

She was pleased to see Luke's lips twitch towards a real smile; it didn't quite make it there, but it was more than he'd done the past four or five days. "I'll take your word for it," he said softly. "If you want to come you can...but please remember that I'm the one meeting with the Council, okay?"

"What's that supposed to me?" Mara asked curiously.

"It means I know you tend to voice your opinions on something you don't like rather strongly, and I want you to let me handle whatever happens in there."

"So you don't think this Council meeting is going to go well?" Mara falling into step beside him as he exited his bedroom and started down the hall.

"I think it's going to be rather unpleasant," Luke said in a tone that told Mara he really didn't care anymore. Once more, she felt that burning worry for his wellbeing, and she put a hand on his shoulder to show her support.

"Well then...I guess I'm coming for moral support. That's good enough of a reason, don't you think?"

Luke spared her a glance, his eyes full of a deep emotion that threw her off for several heartbeats. "More than enough."

There it was; the soft, gentle Luke she knew so well. It was just a flicker, but it was enough, and it caused a smile to grace her lips and comforting warmth to enter her heart. The pair crossed the living room and approached the veranda and the speeder, drawing Padme's attention.

"Where are you two going?" she asked curiously, her gaze never leaving her beloved son. He'd hardly come out of his room, and when he had his mother had drank him in but respected his space, doing what she could without disregarding his wishes to be left alone and giving him as much support as he let her.

"The Council wants to see me; I'm headed there now," Luke said in a soft voice. Mara knew that Luke was well aware of how much everyone wanted to help him, as was he aware of how upset they were that they couldn't and how concerned for his well-being they were. He didn't acknowledge it though; he stayed brief, and he kept his distance. Still, they all respected him for it.

"Oh...okay then...Tell your Father to be home in time for dinner tonight, all right? He's been late the past few days," Padme said, struggling for a lighthearted tone and casual conversation.

"I will," Luke promised, drawing his cloak close around him but leaving the hood down. He offered his hand, and Mara gladly accepted, letting him lead her to the speeder and help her inside in a rather gentlemanly fashion. He started the speeder and took off with a well-practiced, instinctual ease. Mara watched him closely as he directed them through Coruscant's traffic, noting how he seemed deep in thought and even a little tense.

"What are you going to say to them?" Mara asked suddenly. Luke stiffened a little in surprise.

"What?" he asked, though Mara knew that he'd heard her just fine. Still, she repeated her question, and Luke shook his head. "I've come to some...conclusions and several discoveries the past few days...I'm going to share them with the Council. If they take it, that will be great, if not, then I'll do what I must.

Mara cocked an eyebrow. "Sounds like some serious stuff, Farmboy."

Luke let out a sight, exhaling slowly through his nose. "I know what I'm doing...even if no one else thinks I do."

Well, you have been wallowing in misery the past few days, you're not exactly thinking clearly, Mara thought to herself, but she didn't say anything. She wasn't insensitive to his pain, not at all; she just knew that Skywalkers tended to be a little...un-rational in their grieving states.

She just hoped that Luke would beat out that reoccurring family theme, just this once.

When they arrived at the Jedi Temple, Luke pulled his hood over his head, hiding his face in the darkness that the cowl supplied. He interlaced his fingers together just as he had when he'd entered Jabba's Palace in another life, taking several calming breaths so that he could find his center again. He did all of this in the short space of time it tok to reach the entrance to the temple, and with Mara shadowing him, he stepped into halls he hadn't walked in years.

Of course, he'd been in the Temple itself recently, but either he was unconscious, or in the same straight path from the Halls of Healing to the hanger, or in the hangar alone. Now he walked freely through the halls, no guards surrounding him, able to go wherever he pleased. Of course, some of the Temple inhabitants wouldn't like seeing him, but that was beside the point.

As Luke made his way down the main hall, stares from every pair of eyes that he came into range of were pulled to him. Whispers echoed around, with no one bothering to hide what they were saying while Luke kept his gaze trained straight ahead, hood pulled low over his face and his pace unfaltering.

Whispers of Mara Jade, the Knight who left the order to search for the place of her lover Luke Skywalker's exile.

Whispers of Luke Skywalker, Fallen Jedi Padawan who became the bloodthirsty Sith Lord Darth Eius, son of Grandmaster Anakin Skywalker, supposedly redeemed from the dark side of the Force.

Whispers of how Luke Skywalker had fooled so many; how he was still an agent of darkness that would turn on them the moment their guard was down.

Whispers of how the rescue of the Chancellor was staged, and that Luke Skywalker and Judro were actually in league.

Whispers of the Council meeting that was being held to decide Luke Skywalker's fate.

Whispers of a disturbance from Alderaan, so powerful and filled with emotions of grief and hate; could Luke Skywalker have been the source?

Whispers wondering the nature of the relationship between Mara Jade and Luke Skywalker; there were many different whispers here, ranging from beliefs she was his dark apprentice to his personal courtesan because Sith felt no love to several other demeaning, terrible, derogatory theories.

Luke's jaw tightened imperceptivity beneath the hood as he walked, but not because of the jabs at himself; it was the rumors of Mara that riled him, that stirred a deep set anger inside of him. He managed to clamp down on the feeling though, and continued forwards through the halls, ignoring the stares and never-ending whispers as he made his way to the Council Room. Mara's annoyance was a little more obvious in her expression at the rumors and undisguised whispers, but she managed not to say anything about it the whole trip to the Council Room.

When they arrived, Luke came to a fluid halt, closing his eyes and taking several steadying breathes in preparation. He could sense his father in there, of course, and Obi-Wan. He tried to get a feel of what was going on behind those doors, but he only came away with a feeling of tension. Yes, this was going to be an interesting Council meeting indeed.

The doors started to open, and Luke glanced at Mara, placing a hand on her arm. "Perhaps you should just wait outside..."

Mara flashed him a disdainful look and stepped inside, slipping around the corner to stand by the doorway. Luke shook his head slightly at the rebellious action, stepping in himself with a fluid motion and instinctively moving to the center of the Council Room. The last time he'd been here...

"Because of Sidious' dark power, merge, he could not, however. Help us with young fallen Luke, he will, to heal the divide in the Force."

Luke pursed his lips slightly at the memory. Now wasn't the time to fall back into the darker memories from five years ago; right now he needed to focus entirely on what was going on around him. He needed to focus, put his grief aside...

Luke stopped the thought there before it could progress in any unwanted direction, taking the last step and removing his hood in a single, swift motion. His gaze fell on his father first, a gaze of longing and sympathy on the older Skywalker's face before Luke's gaze wandered over the other Council Members.

He was sure everyone could sense the new embittered taint in his soul, and the tired light in his eyes.

"You wanted to see me?" Luke asked, his voice calm, one eyebrow raised as his gaze settled once more on his father.

"Why did you bring Jade with you, Skywalker?" one of the Jedi Masters Luke didn't recognize asked. Luke made it a point to ignore that same icy Jedi Master who's purposely been causing problems for quite some time now—who he still did not have a name for—and inclined his head towards the Master that spoke.

"She asked to come, and I wanted her to," Luke said simply in response. The Jedi Master didn't seem to like that answer, but she didn't push him for a different one. That one troublesome Jedi Master, however, decided to voice his opinion.

"She has no business here; she shouldn't be allowed to stand in," he argued, glancing around the room. Anakin and Luke didn't even spare the man a glance.

"She can stay," Anakin said in a tone so final no one argued further.

Windu leaned forward in his chair. "Skywalker, we want to ask you some questions before we get to the matter at hand, all right?"

"Go on," Luke said in an emotionless tone, meeting Windu's gaze straight on. Windu nodded.

"On Alderaan," Windu started, and Luke visibly stiffened, "many people all over the Galaxy sensed a powerful release of anger and grief into the Force in the form of a Force Scream...we just want confirmation that it was indeed you who was the source."

Luke nodded stiffly. "Yes, I was."

Windu steepled his fingers together. "I see...The times you've seen Judro...what has he said to you?"

"He's extended an offer to join him, and tried to enforce that same offer. As well as threatened everyone close to me if I refuse." Luke was silent for a few moments. "A threat that he has recently started to carry out."

"Just where, exactly, does your allegiance lie at the moment? Some of us find that a little...unclear, at the present time," said the icy Jedi Master. Luke stiffened and turned to face him fully.

"Not with Judro, if that's what you're asking," Luke said sharply, eyes flashing momentarily. Behind him, Mara stifled a smile at how quickly he had shot down that accusation before the Jedi Master could even fully make it.

"So, given the chance, you would help us in the effort to protect the Republic from this war Judro's declared on us?" a female Falleen Master asked him.

Luke turned cool eyes on her, speaking in an unwavering voice. "This war isn't what you think it is. This is a war on me veiled by a war on the Republic." He let his gaze sweep over all those in the room, holding each of their gazes so that they could see that he meant every word that he said. "It was a one sided war until a few days ago."

"What are you suggesting?" The Falleen asked in an even tone.

"I'm saying that this entire time Judro's target hasn't been the Republic, it's been me. He holds a personal vendetta against me; one he will stop at nothing to sate. Even when the Chancellor was kidnapped and he basically had the Republic by the throat, he told me that Chancellor Kuroth was just a small, side achievement. That I was the real prize he was after. Ruling over the galaxy is just a sub-plot for his true schemes. What he really wants is to bring me under his heel or have my head on a pike; he hasn't seemed to have decided yet," Luke said dryly.

"If all he wants is you, then instead of running the risk of you falling again—as I personally believe you will—and turning against us, why shouldn't we just hand you over?" that one Jedi Master asked. Anger flared in several spots in the room, but it was the fiery red-head that was observing that snapped at the Jedi Master first.

"How about we send you to him, hmm? In fact, we can send you there in pieces in indivi—"

"Mara," Luke said sharply, cutting her off and turning to give her a hard look. Her mouth snapped shut, though the venomous look she was giving the Jedi Master remained. Luke turned a hard gaze on the Jedi Master that had constantly pushed for the worst when it came to Luke, meeting his gaze with a calm he was sure infuriated the man. "I will not turn; not again. Back to the matter of why I'm here in the first place; I know that it's to hear the decision on whether or not I will be accepted back into the Jedi Order. No matter what the decision is...I'm not coming back. At least, not anytime soon."

Surprise flickered across several faces, but Luke continued before anyone could stop him. "There's too much I need to do, too many amends I have to make before I come back. Most of what I need to do, I can only do outside of this Order. Truthfully...I'm not ready to come back, and even though part of me does want to return...after everything that's happened, I'm not entirely sure that I ever truly can. I highly doubt that I'd be warmly welcomed by many if I do decide to return, and my return might even drive more people away from the Order." He turned his intense gaze on his father, willing the older Skywalker to understand his decision. "For the most part...there's some things that I have to do first before I even let myself consider coming back."

Several long beats of silence followed Luke's revelation before Master Mundi leaned forward. "What of the information that you hold; your father informed us that you told him there were traitors within the Jedi Order. Will you not share that knowledge with us?"

Luke shook his head. "As I remember them, I will give my father names. I don't have to be a part of the Order to provide that information, though I have to remember before I can impart what I know."

"One last question then," Windu said emotionlessly, fixing Luke with an unwavering stare that Luke held with an expression of ease. "Does the dark side still have any amount of a hold on you?"

Luke was silent for several long, tense moments. Luke cast his gaze to the floor, thinking back on the past few years. "It's a strong, seductive tempter...and I find myself walking the line more often than I care to admit...but I am not Eius, not anymore. I won't willingly go back down that path."

"That's not an answer to his question," the icy Jedi Master pointed out. "It's a simple yes or no."

Luke looked up, his jaw set in stubborn determination. "Not really, no. Not when your entire worlds gone from black and white to gray. No, the dark side does not control me, but yes, I do struggle with it from time to time, much more often than any other point in my life." Luke sighed, shaking his head slightly. "If that is all, Masters...I'll take my leave now," Luke said, already turning for the door.

Before he could leave, his father's voice reached him. "Luke...whenever you want to come back to the Order...we'll be waiting. The door is open for you, should you decide you do want to return."

Luke turned his attention to his father momentarily. "Thank you," he said honestly. "But don't bet on my return. I'm not so sure if it's for me anymore."

With that, Luke turned away, gesturing to Mara and placing a hand on her back as they walked side by side out of the Council Room. The doors slid shut behind them and Luke lifted his hood once more, shielding his face from any prying eyes. Mara was smiling faintly at him, and Luke gave her a strange look.

"What are you smiling about?" he asked curiously, his voice low as they made their way through the Temple halls.

"You," Mara said simply. "It was nice to see you stand up for yourself and turn them down. I saw the Luke I've been missing reappear in there."

Luke cast his eyes towards her happy expression and the twinkle in her eyes, a pang going through his heart. If only she knew...

"It had to be said...and I don't think I want to be in there much longer; I don't know if I want to be here much longer," he muttered in reply.

"We can go home right now, we don't have to linger here," Mara said softly. Luke nodded.

"I know; that's what I was planning."

Mara wound her arm through his. "At least you don't have to worry about operating under the Council and can move at your own pace this way. You can spend all the time home with your family that you need."

Luke forced himself not to react to her words. "Yes...I guess so," he said vaguely. He did his best not to think of how, soon, his true motives would be revealed. By the time that happened...

Well, he wouldn't have to worry about that for a while.

Night fell on the Skywalker home sooner than Luke had expected it would. Padme and Anakin were asleep in their room, Mara once more shared a room with Luke, and Leia and Han were elsewhere at their own apartment. While everyone else was asleep though...Luke was not. No, Luke was up and about, moving with the practiced ease of silence that allowed him to move about without disturbing anyone. He was fully dressed in his Death Star clothes, a pack with a few changes of clothes, enough credits to get by, and a few other miscellaneous items was slung over his shoulder. He paused before he left his room, staring down at Mara as she lay, peacefully asleep in his bed. For a moment, his heart ached, and he took the time to cross the room and place a chaste kiss on her lips before he pushed the feelings aside—before they could change his mind—and he left the room.

It was the middle of the night, and the lights of Coruscant shone all around the apartment in a light that rivaled the stars. Luke didn't care though. He crossed the room and softly laid his holodisk with his pre-recorded explanation on the kitchen counter in plain view, making his way to the landing pad and the speeder. He paused at the veranda, giving his home one last sweep to commit it to memory.

"Where do you think you're going Skywalker?"

Luke closed his eyes and heaved a sigh, dropping his chin to his chest. He should have known he'd wake her up; it would have been better if he just left.

When Luke didn't answer, he heard shuffled movement, and Mara approached him with a look of concern. "Luke...what's going on with you?"

Luke finally turned to face her, his expression completely stoic as he took a seat on the couch's armchair. "Mara...before all of this happened...I had a dream—a vision, though I didn't acknowledge it as one at the time—that I finally understand."

Mara frowned, coming to a stop in front of him. "What are you talking about?"

Luke sighed. "In the dream...there was darkness, and two people calling out to me, asking where I was, and then calling for my help. I tried to, but I couldn't. A man whose face I couldn't see, but his eyes I could killed them while I struggled to break free. One of the people that called for my help...was Jeza," Luke said softly, his eyes becoming unfocused as his mind thrust him back just a few days prior; painfully forcing the image of Jeza's unmoving body, her whispered last words, to the front of his mind.

Mara's gaze softened, and she gently touched Luke's arm. "Luke..."

Luke looked up sharply, catching her tone of voice. "The other was you," he said firmly, with an intensity he knew threw her off guard. Gently, he clasped her hand inside of his own. "Mara, he'll come for you next; I know he will. That's why I have to go; I can't let that happen. I can't lose you too."

Mara yanked her hand back, a look of hurt and shock flashing across her face. "And you think leaving is going to help anyone? Do you really think that's going to help? Judro will still come after us to draw you back out; you won't be able to disappear."

Luke cast his eyes away from her face. "I don't want to disappear, I..." he momentarily lost his voice, staring at the ground below. "I'm going to him."

Mara froze, trying to catch his eyes and see the true intent behind his words. "Y-you're going to join him? To save me? To save us?"

Luke still wouldn't look her in the eyes. "No, I'm going after him; I have to face him...and I won't let him get away with what he did to J...to Jeza," he said, starting out firm before his voice trembled and broke. He gathered himself again, his gaze flickering up towards her eyes. "This is something I have to do alone as well. I knew none of you would understand that, so I didn't say anything, and I decided to leave while no one was watching."

"You weren't even going to say goodbye?" Mara whispered. "Luke...the last time you faced him you were almost killed."

"Not this time," Luke said with a vehemence that obviously alarmed her. He calmed his tone. "Not this time...and whether I have your approval or not, I'm still leaving."

"Please Luke, don't go," Mara whispered. "There's plenty of other ways this can happen, you don't have to go to him alone—"

Luke stood up sharply from his seat on the arm. "That's not true and you know it," he said firmly. He took her hand in his once again, gently rubbing little circles on her knuckles as he spoke in calmer tones. "I have to do this on my own; please Mara, you must understand that. This isn't just for me, either...it's for Jeza, and to protect you. This is one of the paths I have to take alone, and I want to take alone; you know that's true, I know you do."

Mara searched his gaze for several long moments, and Luke didn't break eye contact, staring right back, willing her to understand, to let him go...

Something in her eyes shifted, and Luke felt Mara come to a decision. "I love you..." she whispered softly.

Luke sighed long and low, holding her hand close to his heart as he leaned down and gave her a slow kiss on the lips, letting the sensation last as their mouths moved together in perfect time and pure emotion for perhaps several minutes. Eventually, Luke pulled away, running his free hand through her hair and gazing upon her face in open yet pained adoration. "Thank you for understanding," he whispered. "I love you too."

With that, he leaned down and planted one last kiss against her smooth cheek, letting his lips linger before he pulled away again, letting go of her hand as he turned to walk away. Mara didn't let go, and they clung to each other's fingertips until Luke took the step that broke the contact and carried him out of Mara's reach. He heard her make a soft, pained sound when his fingers pulled away, but he didn't acknowledge it. He crossed the rest of the distance between himself and the speeder, slinging his pack into the passenger side and then taking off without a backwards glance. He knew if he did look back, there was a chance he would turn around and come right back to Mara.

He was doing this for her...for Jeza...for himself...

He knew he needed to.

There wasn't a doubt in his mind.

He was leaving for a purpose.

You got your wish Judro...you have me.

Now I'm coming for you, just like you wanted.

Back at the apartment, Mara watched the dot that was the speeder until Luke was long out of range, her heart aching painfully. Was this the last time she'd see him? Would he come back? If he did come back, would he still be Luke?

Mara took a shuddering breath, hugging herself and staring up at the sky as she whispered out a soft plea.

"Please...come back to us safely Luke..."