Hey guys!
It's not December 25th yet, but I might miss the chance of saying it in the future, so...Merry Christmas! I'll be going overseas soon, so there might be no updates around Christmas and New Year period.
First part of the chapter is inspired by SentinalSlice's review. Thanks for the reviews!
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or Nasuverse, except for Foam-Excalibur.
Warning: a very, very traumatising nightmare, poor Archer—wait, no, take that back—, Shirou and Archer bonding (oh, wow. Very much wow.) and a cliff-hanger.
April, 1980
Archer blinked.
He was standing on familiar sand. Sounds of grating gears reached his ears, and the smog impaired his vision as usual. Letting out a heavy sigh, he turned—
To see a red-haired baby.
They both blinked.
Spluttering, Archer quickly checked on his body—and yes, he was also a baby, identical to the one in front of him, down to the pudgy limbs and chubby cheeks. The only difference was their surrounding; the ground was similarly coarse, but there were no accompanying smog and gears. He let out a high-pitched groan. Fuck you, Alaya.
But his nightmare had yet to end.
Glaring at each other, they shifted their stances, hands ready to call for swords. However, instead of the familiar sturdy hilts of black and white married blades, their hands gripped on something soft and squishy—
...Archer dared not to look at his own hands. Fuck, Alaya, don't you dare—
But in his twins' hands were familiar identical foam swords. Foam-Excaliburs…
Why Foam-Excalibur?! That's his! Not this infuriating bastard's, he already got his own wand, Faker—
Wait.
Gulping, Archer tore his eyes away from his twin, hoping against hope to see metal and very pointy blades in his Reality Marble…
But, foam swords. Everywhere, everyplace, as far as his eyes could see, he couldn't spot any of his lethal blades except for his Foam-Excaliburs, dotting his Unlimited Blade Works—
"PUG YOU, ALANYAAAA—"
"—AAAAAHHHH!"
Archer jerked awake, breathing hard and sweating all over. From the corner of his eye, his twin did the same, his face pale and truly horrified. Their eyes met, widening in understanding, before scrunching their eyes shut so that they could check on their precious Reality Marble, oh please Alaya have some mercy—
Foam-Excalibur!
...Was there, standing erect beside the real Excalibur in all its glory. Hrunting, checked. Caladbolg, checked. Kanshou and Bakuya, checked. All checked; all of his swords were here. Safe and pointy.
Sighing explosively in relief, Archer slumped in their crib. Shirou did the same after finishing his own check to his version of Unlimited Blade Works.
Glancing at his twin, he moved to gave Shirou a pat on the back. Shirou pat him back.
God, that was scary as hell.
.
.
.
The nightmare was too real to be just a dream.
Archer was scared shitless. Why did it happen? Was it a premonition of an imminent disaster in the future? Was it because he selfishly took Foam-Excalibur first? Wait, no; his twin's Reality Marble was also filled with foam swords, not the magical girl wand. Was it because of his aria?
Inwardly, he began to recite his aria. Just to make sure.
I am the bone of my sword. Steel is my body and fire is my blood...
Magical energy began to gather in his body.
I have created over a thousand blades...
Blueprints of legendary swords appeared in his mind.
Unknown to Death, nor known to Life…
His twin shrieked in alarm, yet Archer ignored him.
Have withstood pain to create many weapons…
Yes, no problem so far...his aria was almost finished—
Yet, those hands will only hold Foam—I mean, will never hold anything, fuckkk—
Archer began to bawl pitifully.
.
.
.
'what's wrong with him?'
Wrote Rin on the piece of parchment Arthur had given him, together with the crayons. To prevent the 'Shame on You' disaster from happening again, the adults put Danny, Jo and the visiting Anna inside the playpen, away from the pristine wall. Arthur had made sure of that.
Shirou "hmm?"ed, took a glance at his moping twin, before scrawling something on the same parchment with a red crayon.
'dunno,' it said as the boy shuddered. 'maybe nightmare'.
Rin frowned at the two. Shirou, and surely Archer too, were hardened men tempered in war and blood. Even in their previous world, any nightmare that Shirou might have had never affected him this way. What kind of dream could reduce them to this?
Shirou noted her baffled expression, for he wrote something else.
'foam excalibur only in ubw. no NPs. foam only.'
Rin blinked. Foam Excalibur?
'what's that?'
Shirou scowled. 'Archer's sword'.
What.
Then, he traced a familiar foam toy sword, before quickly dissipating it. Archer whined in the background. He'd purposely left the sword in their crib because he didn't want to be constantly reminded of his dilemma early this morning.
Rin snorted, before laughing so hard she wheezed. She could totally imagine only this toy sword in Unlimited Blade Works. Served them right for being so overpowered.
Shirou only grumbled, letting it go only because she was his girlfriend (not that he'd say that out loud, especially not in the vicinity of James Potter), but Archer wasn't as patient as him. He huffed, annoyed at the baby girl in front of him.
However, he didn't have much blackmail material at the moment, so Archer couldn't really turn the table on her. So the next best thing he could do was to divert her laughter to his twin.
He snatched the green crayon in Rin's hands, before writing something on the parchment.
'at least, i have sword,' he wrote. Then, he pointed at his twin, smirked, and continued. 'he gets the magical wand.' For good measure, he traced Shirou's pink wand and presented it to her.
Shirou sputtered, scrambling to seize the wand from Rin so that he could hide it. Rin's face was torn between amused and, curiously, embarrassment. Archer wondered why…
A memory niggled at his mind. Something Zelretch had said decades ago, but for the love of UBW he couldn't remember what…
Maybe next time.
.
.
.
Shirou and Archer stumbled over each other in panic when their mother's water suddenly broke.
They were made even more hopeless when Arthur quickly put them in their crib, not that they could do anything helpful in this situation. All they did was to get in the way of their father as he scrambled to carry Molly to St Mungo's Hospital through the Floo.
The rest of the Weasley were left behind in the Burrow. Bill, as the oldest, gathered his siblings in the living room and comforted the younger ones who were confused over what was going on. Bill cuddled with Archer and Charlie with Shirou, while Percy hold Fred and George close—then, they huddled together, waiting anxiously for their parents' return.
It was truly the first time Shirou and Archer felt so useless; not even when they were futilely trying to help Saber in the Fifth Holy Grail War did they feel this miserable. For all the weapons in their arsenal, none could help ease their mother the pain of childbirth. Hell, they even doubted that magic in this world could help much, considering they could remember the pale and very exhausted Molly upon their births.
A few minutes passed by in silence, broken occasionally by Fred or George whining. At one point, the Floo flared to reveal the Potters (and the Weasley children quickly deflated upon realising that it wasn't their parents) whom Arthur had asked to help look for his family in the Burrow. Rin was there too, quickly huddling together with the Emiya twins to offer comfort. For once, she didn't care who she hugged between the twins.
Five painful hours of sitting around doing nothing—and finally, Arthur's face emerged from the Floo (prompting Rin to splutter), happy with the good news.
"The baby is born," he exclaimed joyously. "Come to St Mungo's, kids. Time to see your newest sibling!"
And so, ten minutes later, they met one pudgy, red, crying infant named Ronald.
He was fascinating, no matter how ugly Ronald was at the moment. Emiya Shirou was a Sword, someone who expertised in saving people and killing people. But it was their first time meeting an innocent babe up close, one of their own blood to boot; someone who deserved to be protected at all cost. Remembering Ilya and her horrible fate, Shirou and Archer swore there and then to be a good older brother to little Ron.
.
.
.
May, 1980
But there was only one Ron.
One Ron, for the both of them.
Obviously, they'd compete for the title of the best older brother. Not to mention Bill, Charlie, Fred and George were also there. It'd be a fierce competition between the brothers.
Luckily, their parents gave Shirou and Archer a chance to try be older brothers first, since the rest had done the same when the twin Emiyas were still babies. Though, that didn't mean they could not watch how the one-year-old twins interact with ickle Ronniekins. Behind the ajar door, Fred and George were on the floor while Percy was above them, followed by Charlie, Bill, Molly and finally Arthur with his ever-present camera—all peeking inside.
"Ohh! The Muggle baby rattle! Jo's going to use it!"
"Wait, wait. Which one is Jo again?"
"...For now, let's just assume the right one is Joseph, and the left one Daniel."
"Ah, Ronniekins laughs! One point goes to Jo!"
"Danny doesn't seem to like losing against his twin—Ooh! The Pygmy Puff Plushie!"
"Why do they keep using the muggle toys? They should've used the Farting toy! Ron's gonna love it!"
"Fart! Fart!"
"The Farting toy is behind Jo! Just a little bit…"
A long, hearty fart echoed throughout the room.
"Yes!"
Daniel snorted, before bursting out laughter.
"...By Merlin's ba—I mean, beard, his lungs are atrocious beasts! His laughter echoed so loudly!"
"Oh! Ron laughs too! Whose point is this again?"
"Danny's, I think—"
A big teddy bear suddenly appeared in Ron's crib, prompting the baby to cry out in delight.
"Where did that come from?!"
"I think Jo did that, judging from his...smug gummy smile."
"Accidental magic?"
"Nevermind that; another point goes to Jo!"
Unnoticed by their parents, both Fred and George eyed the teddy bear. Oh, how they want one too! It's not fair Ronniekins got the teddy bear before them!
Suddenly, the teddy bear turned into a giant spider. Ron was startled, before bawling very loudly.
"What—spider?! That's going to traumatise him for life!"
Molly was about to barge into the room when Arthur stopped her with a hand on her shoulder.
"Wait," he whispered, before nodding his head at the younger twins in the room. "Leave it to them."
Molly frowned at him, before finally relenting upon noticing that her youngest son's cry had died down. Joseph immediately threw the giant spider out of the crib, away from Ron's sight, while Daniel calmed their baby brother down. They worked together in lifting his mood up, even going as far as squeezing the Farting toy repetitively just to make Ron laugh again.
"...I've recorded it! I've recorded it!"
.
.
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June, 1980
Once again, Fates reared its ugly head.
It was Archer's luck acting up this time. At least, their family was spared from the worst of their horrible luck.
It all started when baby Ron fell sick.
The reincarnated Emiyas felt useless once more. Newborns falling sick was common, but that didn't mean it was less terrifying. Shirou almost traced Avalon in an attempt to heal his baby brother when Arthur beat him to it.
"It's alright, Danny," he soothed Shirou, who, for once, didn't automatically protest that he was Joseph. "Mummy and Daddy will bring him to the hospital, where the healers can make him better."
However, Shirou and Archer refused to be useless anymore. They tugged at their father's sleeves, asking to be brought along to St Mungo's. At least, they'd be there for Ron.
Arthur conceded, and carried them in his arms ("Oof! You two are getting heavy!") while Molly held a feverish Ron. They went through the Floo Network to arrive at St Mungo's, slightly blinded by the fire (and its ridiculousness. The twins did wonder how did Rin react to the magical teleportation method) but otherwise fine. They were disappointed when Arthur left them in the waiting room on the fifth floor, specially provided for children whose parents have to see the healers.
And there, inside a very big but old fashioned playpen, was where they met her.
Saber of the Fifth Holy Grail War.
Arturia Pendragon.
Soon, people, soon.
Thanks for reading!