Summary: AU. Slightly OOC. Kagome Higurashi used to be such an innocent 15-year-old. When the zombie apocalypse hits, it takes everyone by surprise. She and her friends need to work together to escape the undead. Will they ever find love in such an environment, or will they get infected first?

disclaimer: i don't own anything. :(

~ How to Survive a Zombie Apocalypse ~

numb

Kagome's been acting strange lately.

Ever since yesterday afternoon.

I glance at her with concern, noting how slowly she moves and how dull her eyes look.

I lock eyes with Inuyasha, who looks just as concerned.

Without her enthusiasm, no one seems as motivated anymore. Well, except Kikyo. She hasn't changed one bit, and seems to be even a little bit more happy now that Kagome's stopped pestering her about keeping up.

But during our daily spars, Miroku's been slowing down. I'm not faring too well, either. I'm no longer as accurate. Ayame's been missing all her targets when she practices with her daggers. Even Inuyasha, who seems to be feeling the worst out of all of us, has been getting careless. He was nearly bitten last night.

Kagome's energy kept us going. And now…

I pull Inuyasha to the side after we eat, who is watching Kagome swing her sword around.

"What's going on with her? What happened between you guys in the woods?" I ask him.

"I don't know," he replies, but I know he's hiding something from me.

"Inuyasha," I say, glaring at him. "You need to tell me. I'm worried about her. She's never acted this way before."

"Actually" - Inuyasha winces slightly - "she has. When her father died."

"Really? What happened?"

"She got like this. Numb." Inuyasha turns to watch her again. Kagome stumbles and, losing control of her sword, cuts her arm on the blade. Without thinking twice, he rushes forward and tries to take her arm to inspect her wound, but she slaps his hands away, stands up, and walks to the other side of the camp to treat it herself.

All without losing the dull look in her eyes, or the blank expression on her face.

It scares me.

Inuyasha, looking dejected but trying hard not to show it, comes back and sits next to me.

"What the hell was that?" I ask him.

"I don't know, okay!"

"Well then tell me everything you two talked about while in the woods! And afterwards! Why'd you come out looking so angry? Why didn't she want to be near you anymore? She was fine maybe five minutes prior, when you made her sit on your lap! And when you held her hand! And-"

His face progressively turned more and more red, which I secretly found entertaining. He's so transparent. "Alright, alright, fine! Calm down. I'll tell you.

"The first time I took her into the woods, it was because I knew she was acting weird, and after a lot of prodding, she finally told me about her panic attack the other day. I freaked out, she reassured me it was nothing, and we went back. Then the whole thing with Kikyo happened, and then she pulled me into the woods… I didn't know what was going on, and then she told me not to confuse her anymore. I didn't know what she meant by that, but then for some reason, she was under the impression that I was in love with Kikyo-"

"I'm sorry, what?"

"-but I told her that I wasn't! And it's true, I'm not! I hate that bitch. I like seeing her get riled up, but only because I know it's because Kagome said something to make her so angry. I like when Kagome yells at her. I like seeing Kagome get riled up because she's hot when she's mad. I like when Kikyo tries to say something back but Kagome shoots it down in like, two seconds. I love that Kagome's always got something to say in edgewise, and won't let people like Kikyo tell her what to do or how to feel."

I sigh. He's got it bad, huh?

He suddenly looks sad. "Then she said not to use her to make Kikyo jealous. But she should know by now that I don't- I'd never-"

He runs a hand through his hair, and I feel bad for him. I know he's been in love with Kagome for years now, and I also happen to know that she returns his feelings. But…

"But that still doesn't explain why she's acting this way."

"Right, I was getting there." Inuyasha turns to me, looking more serious now. "She confessed to me. At least, it sounded like a confession."

My jaw dropped, I couldn't help it. Kagome confessed to Inuyasha?

There was no way. "She's more prideful than that," I tell him incredulously.

"I know," he nods. "That's what I thought. But I think it might've been an accident."

"What did she say, exactly?"

"She said stuff like 'Don't do this to me. Stop being so touchy with me if you like her. Don't give me the wrong idea, you know I get attached too easily.'"

I arch a brow. It wasn't really a confession, but with Kagome's pride, it came pretty damn close.

"And? What did you say?"

He flinches. "I… laughed."

I can feel the veins popping out of my forehead. "You… you laughed?"

Immediately, he becomes defensive. "Well fuck, Sango, I don't know! I've loved her for, what, six years? And finally, finally she's shown some attraction towards me! I was fucking excited, okay? And I didn't know what to say, or how to respond, so I just…"

We go silent for a few seconds as we ponder the situation.

"She probably thought you didn't take her seriously."

"Yeah, that's why she got mad and came back here. I was coming after her, but she wouldn't listen, so I got mad."

"It can't have been that," I say thoughtfully. "She's not the type to go silent after something like that. It must have been after, when you guys were yelling at each other at the campsite. And something tells me you know exactly what it is."

Inuyasha looks at the floor. I knew it.

"Well? Spill."

He sighs. "Our conversation at the fire was short. After you all had left, Kikyo was still at the fire, watching us. I was about to tell her to beat it, but Kagome whipped around and did it for me. Then I was in the middle of telling Kagome that it hadn't been necessary, and that I was going to tell her to get lost. But she interrupted me, filled in my sentence with something completely outlandish-"

"What did she say?"

"She thought I was going to say that what she did was uncalled for. Then she justified it by saying that Kikyo had told her to kill herself, and she had said that, but Kagome had always talked about how she wouldn't let Kikyo's words get to her..."

"And?"

"That's what I said."

"Wait a second-"

I thought about what that must have sounded like to Kagome.

She told me to kill myself.

And?

I clench a fist, trying with all my might not to slap that stupid look off his face. "You… blubbering… moronic… completely socially inept…"

"What the fuck, Sango?"

"You complete idiot! Why would you say something like that!"

"I explained right after, I promise! I apologized, said it came out wrong, and kind of went on a tangent because I was so panicked, but slowly I started to notice that her arms and legs stopped shaking, and her scent went from scared to hurt to nothing."

Inuyasha slumps over slightly, his eyebrows creasing in fear. "Sango... I can't pick out her scent anymore. That has never happened before."

"You can't… you can't smell her?"

"No, that's not it. I guess that wasn't completely true. I can still pick out her natural scent. You know, how everyone has their own scents. But I can also sense people's emotions because those tend to intertwine with their natural scent. Like you, for example. You're on edge. I can smell it. Get it?"

I nod.

"But Kagome… I can't smell any of that. I only smell vanilla and sakura. Usually I smell her happiness mixed in with that, or content, or calm at least, but there's nothing. Like she doesn't feel anything at all.

"She panics when she gets hurt. Not a lot. There's just a slight, fleeting half-second where immediately after she gets injured, I smell a hint of fear. But when she cut herself on her sword earlier… nothing."

I stare at him, dumbfounded. "And this came from… what?"

"When her father died, she became like this. But I was still able to sense her emotions. Very faintly.. as if they were disappearing. But now I can't."

"Somehow, you being a complete and utter asshole to her was worse than her father dying," I tell him flatly. "I really, really hate you for that, you know."

His ears droop slightly, and I feel awful for him despite myself.

"But it probably isn't that," I tell him honestly. "It probably has to do with the fact that you helped her out of it. Because you did, didn't you?"

He falters slightly, but nods.

"Before the apocalypse, she was telling me a bit about the walls she built up around her heart after her father passed. Losing the people who are precious to her is one of her worst fears. She told me about how you managed to tear the walls down, and brought her out of the state she was in. She said that no matter what, she'd always be indebted to you for it. She said something really mushy, too.. Something about how you taught her how to love again or whatever."

I lock eyes with him (and notice he's blushing like a schoolgirl. What a loser) and say seriously, "You've changed her. She's back to the little girl who lost her dad, only now she's afraid she'll lose the guy who has been there for her since day one. This numbing thing… it's probably some sort of coping mechanism. She's trying to protect herself, trying to prepare herself for the day you say, 'I've had enough Kags, it's best if we keep our distance'."

Inuyasha's eyes widen. "But I'll never-"

I put a hand up, and he stops talking. "I know that, Inuyasha. Everyone does. Even Kikyo, as much as she hates to admit it. Everyone knows - except Kagome. You need to prove to her that you'll never leave her, and maybe that'll break her out of the shell she's in right now."

He stays silent as he thinks about what I've said.

"Listen," I say, and he looks up. "From what I've learned in my psychology class, this kind of stuff tends to get worse with time. Whatever you plan to do, you'd better do it fast."

That's all the convincing he needs. Once those words are out of my mouth, he nods his thanks, and up and leaves, making a beeline for Kagome's tent.