Out of Mirkwood
Scribbles-on-Parchment
October 19, 2019
Chapter 15 – The White Tree
Kélion leaned his head against the rough bark of the tree and closed his eyes. He had never imagined that he would ever live to see Legolas's funeral. This was not right. None of this was. Anger suddenly overwhelmed him. Kélion punched the white oak tree that stood in front of him, not noticing as the rough bark tore into his hand causing it to bleed. He did not care about anything anymore.
FLASHBACK
"Where are you, you little orch?" Kélion grinned as he slowly began to pick his way up the tall oak tree, "What will adar say when I tell him where I found you? You know you should not be in here without Êmand, nor are you allowed to be so high in a tree. You should thank the Valar that it was me that caught sight of you and not adar. He would not be as kind to you and I will be."
There was only silence. The smile on the prince's face was slowly replaced by a frown. Usually that threat would make his little brother protest immediately. Was the elfling so upset that he did not care? But what could have happened to cause this?
The Sinda shook his head and continued nimbly up the tree.
"Legolas, why would you not answer me? Have I done something to make you upset at me?"
Kélion had been surprised to catch sight of his brother. The sunlight filtering through the branches was causing his golden hair to shine.
You never were very good at hiding, the ellon thought a smile flitting briefly across his face.
He swiftly scampered up the last few branches before coming to rest on the same one as Legolas.
"Penneth, what is wrong? You did not answer my calls."
The young prince did say a word but stayed where he was looking out between the leaves over the surrounding forest. His face showed no emotion.
Kélion quietly sat next to him, realizing that the elfling was not ready to talk to anyone just yet. The two of them sat in silence, listening to the wind move through the branches of the trees. After a while, the eldar looked over at Legolas and to his surprise, he saw silver tears glistening on his brother's face.
"What is it muindor nín? Why do you weep?" Kélion began to gently wipe away the silent tears that had fallen.
He had rarely seen his young Sinda cry and he was worried as to what had caused this.
"Tell me, have I done something to cause your heart grief?" Kélion wished that he would turn to look at him or give him any clue as to what had happened.
Below them the older elf could hear Êmand calling for the young prince and he know that his time with his brother was growing short.
"Legolas…" he abruptly stopped as the elfling suddenly threw himself into the ellon's arms.
Kélion was startled but quickly wrapped his arms around the young elf, who was now openly sobbing.
"Are you hurt?"
The golden head shook back and forth, however, this did little to relieve the prince's worries. He did not want to pressure his brother if he was not yet ready to speak. So instead he started humming softly hoping to soothe Legolas.
"Why does adar hate me?"
Kélion went silent, confused by the question, "Adar does not hate you, penneth."
"He does hate me."
"No, he loves you. He just does not know how to show it to you at times."
"But you love me," the young ellon looked up at his older brother, "And I know that you still love me even when you get mad at me, yet it is not the same with adar."
"And why do you say that?" Kélion's heart was breaking at the hurt look in the elfling's tear-filled eyes, "What did adar say now?"
Legolas was silent for a moment, "I told him that I wanted to go out into the forest by myself. I told him that I was old enough now, but he got mad and said that I am too young and vulnerable to leave the palace on my own. So I told him I was strong enough to protect myself and he shouted at me that I should just go out there and get myself killed. That he didn't love me anyway."
The Sinda broke off and buried his head back into his brother's lap. Kélion gently ran his hand gently through the elfling's soft golden locks as he waited for the sobs to die down.
"He does love you penneth; more than life itself. He is afraid of losing you which is why he does not let you leave. He lost naneth and he cannot bear to lose you as well."
Legolas finally turned his tear-streaked face towards the prince, "I can care for myself. Adar doesn't understand that I am not an elfling anymore. I am all grown up now like you."
The eldar smiled sadly and hugged his brother to him, "You are still but an elfling, however, there is no shame in that One day you will be as old as I am and you will wish that you were young once again," the young ellon looked at him skeptically as he continued, "Adar would not be able to live with himself if you got hurt or killed while you are still so little. He is only trying to protect his heart. You must come to realize that he does not mean the harsh words that he says when he is angry. Adar says them because he does not know what else to do. Hanna?"
Legolas wiped the tears from his eyes with the back of his hand, "Ú-chenion. But adar is not afraid of anything and neither can you. Le maethor veleg a gornui."
Kélion could not help but chuckle at this, "Everyone is afraid of something mell muindor nín. Even me."
The bright blue eyes of the young prince looked at his brother questioningly, "What are you afraid of?"
"I will tell you another time Legolas. Come let's go and find Êmand before he tares the entire garden apart trying to find you."
END FLASHBACK
As the memory faded Kélion felt hopeless wash over him yet again. He let out an anguished cry and slumped against the tree letting himself slide to the ground.
"I am afraid of losing you, Legolas. I am afraid of all the joy being sucked from my life. I am afraid of having to face a world without you in it, and now all my worst fears are coming to life, penneth. Yet this time there is no one for me to turn to."
"Ion nín."
The prince looked up to see the tall, elegantly robed figure of his adar standing in front of him. He quickly dried his tears with the back of his hand.
"Yes, hîr nín?"
The eldar was surprised to hear the elven king's next words.
"It is alright to shed tears, just do not let the grief settle too deep into your heart and over time things will get better."
A tear trickled down Thranduil's cheek as he said this. The sorrow of the day weighed heavily on him. They had buried his beloved son next to his wife under the white oak tree in the garden; the very one they sat under now. He had always anticipated his sons having to bury him, not the other way around.
The Sinda lowered himself down next to Kélion. He understood why the ellon had come here as this had been Legolas's favorite tree as a young elfling.
The king closed his eyes remembering the young, bright-eyed elf that had been the joy of his life for so many years. This was the Legolas he would always remember, not the cold lifeless body they had buried.
"Adar, what are you afraid of?"
Thranduil opened his eyes and looked at his son. It was an odd question, but he answered it nonetheless,
"I am afraid of losing someone I love. The pain in my heart I can withstand, but the regret and hopelessness I will have to live with forever."
Êmand sighed. The funeral for the young prince had been almost too much for him to stand. Though it had been several days since Legolas's death, he still felt as if he were in a dream... no, a nightmare. A piece of his heart had been torn out and it could never be replaced.
The funeral had been solemn and long; had Legolas been there he would have hated it. The deathly quiet that settled on all the eldar gathered made Êmand want to go mad. This had not been the elfling's life. He had been full of life. This was not the way to honor him.
The Silvan paused as he walked past the empty room that had belonged to the prince. No voice called out in greeting as he pushed the door open and walked in. Everything was just as it had been when Legolas had left. Thranduil had forbidden anyone from changing anything, for to him it was like the last remnant of his son; the small ray of hope that Legolas would still come back.
Everything in the room reminded him of the young ellon. The pile of clothes on the floor, the arrow fletchings scattered on the desk, the crumpled bedsheet. Êmand frowned. The room was too dark. Why were the curtains drawn over the windows? Legolas never liked to close them.
The Silvan marched over and flung the curtains open, letting sunlight spill into the room. He sighed and found himself looking down into the garden. A small smile slowly formed on his face as he caught sight of two figures sitting side-by-side under the white oak that stood tall. It was Thranduil and Kelíon.
The only thing that Legolas would have enjoyed about this day would have been seeing this. He would certainly have grinned at the sight of his adar and brother. However, as he thought of this the smile quickly vanished from his face. The elfling would never get the chance to see this.
Once again overcome with grief Êmand quickly turned away from the window, the pain in his heart doubled. Legolas would never get to see any of this again.
The ellon marched across the room, regret and anger building in his heart. None of this was fair. The Sinda should still be alive and would still be alive had he had done things differently. In that moment Êmand wished that the arrow had struck his heart instead of his leg; that he would have died that day in the forest. He could have died satisfied that he had done his duty and saved Legolas.
At least then I would have been saved from the pain of failure.
The arrow.
The Silvan stopped in his tracks. Everyone had forgotten about the attack in the woods and the arrow that he had stopped from hitting Legolas. Surely this could not have been a mistake. Someone had fired that at them on purpose; he was sure of it. An assassination attempt or a warning?
The ellon frowned. Everything about this situation seemed so wrong. He stalked out of the room, a new sense of determination in him. He was going to find whoever had shot that arrow.
Elvish Translations:
orch – orc
adar – father
penneth – little one
muindor nín – my brother
naneth – mother
hanna – understand
Ú-chenion – I don't understand
Le maethor veleg a gornui – you are a mighty and brave warrior
mell muindor nín – my dear brother
ion nín – my son
hîr nín – my lord