This one shot might be a bit confusing if you haven't read my other fanfic "The Price of a Life" It refers to that fic quite a bit in this chapter!
A mention of self harm/suicide implied but mostly just alcohol use.
"Well, how do I look?" Tony Stark turned towards the young spiderling in his flashy suit, it was a big benefit party night and Tony Stark was actually very excited, Pepper was free as well for once so the two were going to have a date night for the first time in weeks now. Sure, it was kind of business- but it was for a good cause! The party would be a formal event, and so not a bad place to have a fancy date night anyways.
"You look like you could own like,a private island Mr. Stark!"
Tony looked a bit taken a back, "I must not be dressed up enough then- I own three of those Pete."
Peters eyes widened, "Why don't we ever go to them?!"
"Because we are either fighting, hurt, on business, or in school- but I will keep it in mind."
"Oh- yea...true! If I don't get hurt for like...two weeks can we go?"
Stark rolled his eyes, "how about, if you stay in one piece until summer break we can all go- Aunt May, you, Pepper, Happy, me, of course- it'll be fun."
The billionaire felt like he had just given Peter a freaking new car by the expression on the kids face, "seriously?! You mean that?"
"Well yea, but you have to get there first."
Peter nodded, looking oddly more determined about living now than ever.
The watch on Tony's wrist beeped signaling 8PM, thus, time to get Pepper and go.
"Now, remember our agreement? No patrolling tonight- none. In fact- no using the suit at all. Ok? Didn't you say it was a-what did you call it..."
"A homework night?"
"Yes! Homework. And if you get bored you can swim, or go to the movie room or-"
"I'll keep busy Mr. Stark! Swear."
"Good. Ok... damn, Pepper should be ready by now-"
"Funny, I was in the other room waiting for you."
Tony looked over to find Pepper standing in the door way, her beautiful lavender dress and floral accents- she looked stunning.
"You clean up nice!" She smiled as she straightened Tony's tie. Tony smiled warmly, "I mean you complete the look, or maybe I complete yours?"
"Hm, both."
And so the two took off, Tony in his gray suit and matching lavender colored tie and pocket cloth and Pepper in her lovely flowing lavender dress and diamonds. The two looked amazing- Happy complemented them as he opened the door to the back of one of the multi million dollar cars parked out front.
Stark gave Peter one last glance before Happy took off.
It wasn't even 9PM yet and Peter had been so hyper focused on his homework- he was actually done with the weeks worth he had. All of it would get extra credit for being early, he got a slight satisfaction at having no extra work other than patrols for the week- although he hardly counted patrols as work, he loved flying through the night and helping people.
He sighed and looked out the giant window view of the cityscape as he put his homework away and set his book bag to the side. "What to do now..." He had to admit, it was pretty lonely in the large building, as nice as it was, it wasn't anything like his cramped and cozy apartment with May.
He had been so stressed lately, with May working doubles and him going back and forth to upstate New York- not to mention balancing school and being an avenger. He had been doing very well at keeping his grades up, not getting hurt- well...lately at least, it had all been so much, he just needed a break. Hence why he had gotten so excited about the possible vacation.
He had felt...alone lately, he didn't want to revert back to months ago- his depression medication had been doing really well and therapy was not as often now. Sometimes he felt like he needed to go more- but he wouldn't dare ask, in fears they would think he was getting worse again. Besides, he had finally gained everyone's trust again, he didn't want to have to rebuild all that once more.
He just wanted a break.
Not like he used to want a break though- not by running away,self harm or dying, he really just wanted to relax. He couldn't seem to let himself just have a lazy day, like his body was too hyper vigilant to allow such a thing, he blamed the PTSD.
He remembered Tony sitting in on some therapy sessions, the man had opened up a bit about his own PTSD and anxiety, how he had turned into an alcoholic because it had taken the stress away. Of course he added that it hadn't been worth it...but what if just once Peter tried it? Just once. It certainly wouldn't make him an alcoholic, and no one was even here! So what would be the damage? Tony wouldn't be back until midnight probably, they were always at the benefits for quite a while.
Peter nodded, his mind was made up, and so- he made his way to Tony's built in bar in the main rooms, the window overlooking the city was beautiful, to Peters delight the alcohol bottles weren't locked up like he had expected them to be. His medications had always been locked away since months before, he was slowly working his way to earning the responsibility to take them on his own again though.
FRIDAY had not said anything as he made his way to the mini bar, Peter supposed without Karen snitching there wasnt a huge indicator he was doing anything wrong.
He looked through the hard liquors, there were so many choices and honestly...even though he was a teenager he didn't know much about any of the drinks that were available. And so he picked what labels looked the most appealing and which flavors seemed not disgusting. Luckily there was soda and different mixers in the mini fridge as well.
So, he set off, not entirely sure what he was doing but excited to possibly feel relaxed.
His first try was vodka and sprite- absolutely not.
Second was whiskey and coke- disgusting.
Then came a strong rum and some pineapple juice with sprite- perfection.
The mix was perfect, the alcohol didn't burn as much as the others and it was very easy to drink!
Peter did not know a lot about alcohol really, so when the bottle said 40% alcohol- he hadn't really thought it would be so overwhelming after a few drinks. And yet, as he was on his third cup, he started to grin.
Everything seemed so damn funny, like there wasn't a care in the world to be had, and suddenly the posh couch looking over the city looked amazing. Peter sat in the dim light looking out over the city, he never thought he would up here. In this beautiful pent house, having the prettiest view to be had over the city he loved.
He started to tear up as he realized how lucky he was, to have his aunt, Mr. Stark, Ned and MJ- not to mention his powers. Sure, things got scary and hectic but...this seemed to solidify the worth of it all.
He loved this feeling, craved it even more as the liquid in the big bottle disappeared, he soon made a glass of the vodka and sprite that was once disgusting but now- seemed just fine!
"This is so awesome..." Peter giggled, thats when his phone started ringing. "Mr. Stark?! Ok, ok, act normal, you got this."
"Hey kid."
"Mr. Stark! Enjoying the party?"
"Eh, it's ok, it was a good date night atleast."
"Er...was?"
"Yea...was...have you looked at a clock lately?"
Time had gotten away from Peter, way too quickly, it was 2AM on the large clock sitting at the bar. "oh shit."
"UM- What was that?"
"N-nothing! I was so busy I didn't even realize it was so early- or late I guess...wow that works both ways...time is weird. Maybe that's why they say its relative? Hm-"
"Ok! What the hell did you do? You know what- scratch that, Pepper just went to the room and I am on my way to the elevators- do not move."
As soon as Tony hung up Peter moved- very quickly. "no,no,no..."
He quickly stuffed the bottles in their rightful places- a bit too quickly as the godforsaken whiskey bottle top cracked just enough to cut Peters hand. The teen was so out of it he hadn't even noticed the gash or cracked glass as he scurried out of the main room and ran back to his place at the counter, he quickly pulled out all of his finished homework and made it so he was writing the last answer. He could play this off. He could do it.
As the elevator doors opened Peter finally felt a slight discomfort on his hand- he brought his hand up and cursed to himself as blood dripped on his geography papers. He squinted at his hand, the room was spinning too fast now- shit, how much had he drank anyways? He hadn't sat up from the couch in a while, it seemed being drunk got worse as he had ran.
Tony was suspicious as soon as the phone call had started- but he wanted to see for himself. Sometimes the kid was just anxious and stuttered...but the phone call seemed different then that. So he played it cool,"Sup kid? Still working on homework? Its been like six hours, how much do they give you guys anyways?"
Peter grunted as he stuffed his hand in his hoodie pocket and used his other to hide the bloody papers under a nearby folder. "Too much! Way too much homework, fucking ridiculous really Mr. Stark."
Tony's eyes widened as he got closer to where Peter sat, the kid looked like shit, his hair was a mess and there was a strange sense of confusion in his eyes, "wow there, since when do you cuss with the big kid words?"
Peter panicked, had he cussed? He couldn't even keep track of his responses...he needed to get to his room quickly. "Oh- I guess I'm just frustrated is all!"
Clearly bullshit. Kid was out of it. Tony gave Pete a chance though, to fess up."Ah...ok...well, is this really all you have been doing?"
"Yea! Pretty much my night right here."
Time to come in for the kill. "And that's why you are slurring your words too?"
Tony could see the panic and confusion increase as Peter tried to come up with an excuse."Oh- well I kind of have a weird headache that's been coming on strong- making me kind of dizzy actually..." Peter wasn't lying there, suddenly his vision started shifting way too much and gravity seemed to be swaying all around. It seemed the more he tried to focus on one thing, the more his vision spun.
He didn't realize Tony was holding him by his shoulders as he leaned too far forward, the alcohol on his breath was evident. "Ok kid, what did you drink and how much?"
"Drink?! I didnt! I...I- um.."
"Cut the bullshit, your breath says everything you actually have been doing the past several hours, so lets take a field trip and figure out how much is in your system before we go to the med bay and take your BAC."
"I...o-ok..sorry."
Tony didn't think the kid would have that much- he was pretty sure Peter had drank maybe once or twice in his life and he was willing to bet it didn't take much to get the kid hammered. But as the two approached the built in bar in the other room Tony found he was mistaken. He kept stock of his alcohol, he didn't drink as much now but he knew damn well what was stocked and how much. So when he picked up the empty rum bottle he became worried- then he found the vodka bottle that was half gone and started to feel sick. He then took inventory of everything else and found it was fine- except a cracked open whiskey bottle that had dry blood on the top of it. His mind reeled too fast, coming up with the worst scenario.
It had been months since the kid had any self harm episodes...
"Where is the shard of glass?"
"I- what? I don't have glass..."
"Peter, damnit, where is it? You need to give it to me, you cant go back to cutting you have gotten so far why would you-"
That's when the tears started and Peter felt gravity once again smack him over, except this time Tony was too far around the bar to catch him. And so he slammed to the ground, that's when the heaving started and the inevitable stream of vomit began. Tony cussed as he ran around and held Peter on his side. "Jesus Christ kid, you drank way too much. FRIDAY what the hell?!"
No such voice activated to respond back, "FRIDAY!"
Nothing.
"Great time to malfunction...I should have checked...I should have gotten Bruce to keep an eye on him damnit I should have-"
"Mr..Stark- Imok, just- dizzy..." That was the last of Peter as Tony cradled his head from falling in his own vomit. Tony got out his phone and speed dialed Bruce, "I know you're on vacation and all but Peter-"
"I'm on my way." Bruce didn't really ever need an explanation when Tony called, usually if it involved Peter it was something that needed to be addressed, he had actually just gotten back home from his trip so this had to be some kind of twist in fate.
It didn't take any time at all for Bruce to come into the med bay, Tony had easily picked up the kid and brought him to a medical bed, got him cleaned up and nervously paced back and forth the bedside.
"What do we got?"
"He drank tonight."
"- ok...drank as in?"
"Drank too much- as in almost a bottle and a half of hard liquor."
Bruce nodded solemnly, we'll need a blood sample quickly and I'll determine how much alcohol in his system.
Soon enough the results came in, causing immediate action to take place. Peter had regained consciousness two times before they got the results in. He didn't say much, mostly slurred sentences of nonsense then his eyes would flutter back once more leaving him silent.
His heart rate and blood pressure were too high, his breathing seem to be more and more strained by the minute. His heart was working to fast, and too irregular. Even Tony could tell something was very wrong as the heart monitor beeped.
"Ok, we need to get him an IV ASAP, we'll put him on oxygen, we will try the mask but we might have to switch to intubation if his breathing doesn't stabilize."
"Whats his BAC?" Tony asked, he knew alcohol poisoning, he knew every level of the blood alcohol symptoms."
Bruce looked apprehensive to say, as his medical team arrived he sighed, "Its .4 Tony...hopefully with his increased metabolism we can get him to more stable vitals but...for now please just try to relax and let us help him.
"..ok..." Tony took a heavy seat in a chair outside of the busy hospital room, his mind reeled, why would the kid do this? He had gotten so far with recovery. Had this been an attempt? Did he take anything else? And what of the shard of glass that was missing?
An hour passed and finally Tony gathered up the courage to round the corner and sit beside Peter, he had ended up not needed to be intubated- yet at least. His vitals were slowly getting stable but his heart had taken a hit due to the increase in blood pressure. For now, they would have to monitor and keep him hydrated. Tony knew how shitty it was to have alcohol poisoning...but he had to admit he had never had it this bad before. Of course, he knew a little more about his limits than Peter.
Bruce came in half an hour later to check in, "he managed to get by without intubation, but he will be on oxygen for quite a while so please make sure he keeps that mask on if he wakes up while you're here. Oh- and i found this in his hand..."
Bruce held up a baggie with a chunk of glass in it, Tony immediately grabbed it.
"Was he hiding this?"
"If by hide you mean it was lodged in his hand then yes. It looks like it was an accident, the wound is jagged, not straight and with the amount of alcohol he had- im willing to bet he hadn't even noticed."
Somehow that brought relief to Tony, knowing that it likely was not intentional. But still..."He has been doing so well, why this?"
"Hes never really done this before...not in this way. Maybe he really was just trying to take some stress away, he doesn't know anything about alcohol so he probably didn't realize how much to drink and likely drank it too fast."
"I hope its that simple..."
"I don't think this is a suicide attempt if that's whats going through your head, this just seemed like he was trying to find a quick fix to his anxiety. Its a little step back but...he likely didn't self harm, and he likely didn't do this as an attempt so as frustrating as it is...its progress."
Tony sighed, silently praising Bruce for his clear headed perceptions, "I just need to talk to him, just to be sure."
"Definitely, he should be up by morning, he will probably feel like death but we will monitor him overnight and keep him on fluids. In the mean time...get some rest."
Soon 2am came and went, then 5am, then on to 11am, finally at lunch time Peter woke up and decided to freak out about the mask on his face.
"Hey! Wow kid, stop, you need that to breathe right now. You're oxygen still isn't normal."
Peter calmed down as he looked over at Tony and squinted, Stark turned the lights to a dimmer setting and crossed his arms.
"I wont full on lecture you right now because I know you feel like shit but I need to know a few things. Ok?"
Peter nodded, terrified.
"Was this an attempt?"
The response was instant and pure, the kid shook his head quickly and ripped his mask off despite further warning not to. "I-I will put it back on but- I swear this was not an attempt, I really...well..Its been hard to relax lately. And I know you said stay away from alcohol but in some of our therapy sessions you said it did help you feel relaxed- even though you said it wasn't.. worth it. I just figured...that...maybe-"
"Hold on- put this back on, your gasping. Let me talk. I get it now, ok? You were just trying to relax- but we can get you a PRN for that. I know we were trying to avoid them but I think it would really help you not be as anxious. Alcohol is a depressant too, meaning it wont help your medications work whatsoever, and you know that I have said hundreds of times that it really isn't worth it. But...I get it, just this once, I get it. I understand you were just curious and everything- but damn how much freaking alcohol did you think it to to get drunk?"
Peter looked down embarrassed and shrugged.
"Also, how the hell did you manage to get stitches in your hand?"
That seemed like news to Peter as he brought his shaking hand up and looked at it amazed, "I...don't remember that."
Tony sighed in relief, the story had finally been pieced together, the kid had gotten black out drunk and sliced his hand trying to hide everything. "Figured."
As Peters monitor started to show an increased heart beat again, Tony decided the kid needed alot more rest, and so did he. "We'll talk more but for now- just know that we can always work through what ever you have going on, you have to trust me though. You have to trust all of us. We know you are trying, and honestly Bruce brought up that this is slightly progress considering you didn't turn to self harm. So...just rest, ok?"
By the time Stark had finished his sentence Peter had drifted off, leaving Tony to finally go get rest on the couch across the room, he hadn't really let himself sleep until he had talked to Peter so now- now was crash time.