August 26, 2004

Harry's p.o.v

"Harry."

My hands clenched my hair. It wasn't the first time they did that today. "I know!" I yell. "I know but I'm still so angry!"

The doctor's office was a calming blue but it might as well have been Gryffindor red for all the fury I felt.

"It's okay to be angry Harry, as long as you don't put yourself or others in danger," Dr. McDouglas replied. "Could you tell me what you're angry at?"

"Everything!"

The doc nodded and wrote some things down. "And what exactly does that include?"

"I-I..."

The doc closed her notebook and stood up, grabbing something from her drawer on her way. "We need to understand what you are angry about Harry. There's so much anger that's been buried, it's all become tangled up and you don't know how to express it. It might even be possible that this is what keeps you from finding 'Just Harry'." She stood up and extended her hand to me; in it was a brown journal.

"I want you to write down everything that makes you angry. Doesn't matter what it is. Waiting in line for coffee, the telly not having your favorite show, even the color of the sky. If you're sad write it down, if you're scared write it down. Anything that makes you feel something, I want you to write it down.

"You don't have to show it to me or anyone else, but knowing what gets through the famous persona will let you know what makes 'Just Harry' tick."

I grabbed the journal. The last journal I'd held was Tom's Horcrux. At least this one was brown. And made with synthetic leather. "Will it actually work?" I ask.

The doctor smiles. "For some it does. For others, it can be frustrating but we'll never know unless we try it. You said you don't have a lot of close friends. I think this," she taps the journal, "could help you express yourself when you feel you're screaming into the void and not getting any answers."

I flipped the journal in my hands. It was man-made paper, not parchment. And it was spiral, not bound leather. "I'll try it then."

"Good."

"Can I decorate it?"

"However you want to."

Astoria's p.o.v

I stared at the gift basket. Then at the woman standing on my doorstep. Then at the gift basket again.

Granger stood in front of my door looking just as confused as I did.

"What did Draco do now?" I ask her.

"It's more of what I did actually."

I open the door wider. "Head straight then take a left. He's in the living room."

Granger stepped into the house and looked at me one more time before following my directions.

You leave the country for a week and the Golden Trio break up, your son makes a new friend, and your husband's schoolboy crush/archenemy shows up at your house.

"I'm buying a damn portable floo," I muttered to myself.

I moved into the kitchen and grabbed the tea set from a house elf's hands. Might as well figure out what I missed.

I stayed outside the living room while the two started talking.

"- I can always buy another one. Or pick something else if that buys your forgiveness," I hear Granger say.

"What in damnation is that Granger?" Draco responds.

"It's an 'I'm-sorry-I-was-a-total-Witch-with-a-capital-B' gift basket."

A what?

"Yeah; no. I'm not accepting that."

"Why on God's green are you saying no?"

"I thought you couldn't take your God's name in vain."

"Draco," she warned.

I stepped inside before she could start hexing. "I bring tea and confusion. Could someone explain why Draco's schoolboy crush is in our house?"

Hermione looks at me all confused but smiles as Draco started blushing.

"Schoolboy crush?"

Draco glares at me then at Hermione. "Well, you were passably pretty and powerful, so just shut up."

Hermione starts smirking more. "No, please! I want to hear more about this crush of yours."

Draco glared. "I will end you, Granger."

Setting the tea set down I sit opposite to Granger. "We can embarrass Draco later. I want to know what on earth I missed this week."

Draco sighs and sits back down. "Hermione, this is my wife Astoria Malfoy née Greengrass. Astoria, clearly you remember Hermione."

I smirked. "Clearly."

"A pleasure to meet you Astoria." To Draco she says, "how did you get so lucky? She's too good for you."

Draco slumps in his seat. "This is why I didn't want to introduce you two."

I poked him. "Explanation please." I poked him again.

"Stop poking me, woman!"

"Start talking then." Poke.

"I exploded on him and Scorpius."

"I pushed you too far Granger, I'm not taking anything personally when you're like this."

"You mean while I'm mentally and emotionally unstable?" She shrugs when Draco stares at her. "I'm woman enough to admit I'm not okay Draco."

"Wow", I say, "that explained exactly nothing."

Hermione sighed. "It all started when I came back. People aren't happy with my disappearing act and combined with my mental weakness-"

Draco cuts her off. "You're not mentally weak."

Hermione gives him a look. "...and combined with my mental state at the time, I was not in a good place." She continued, "Malfoy helped me, we became friends, I screwed up and here we are."

I was still in the dark about a lot of things, that explanation was too brief to tell me the itty bitty details but I had a Plan.

I stood up and grabbed Hermione. "We're going out and you can tell me what happened. It sounds like you need a woman's ear that is unrelated to the problem."

I pulled her out of the room with me. "We just met!"

"Nothing creates friendships faster than spending money and eating our feelings!"

"At least let me grab my cloak!"

I wave her concerns away. "We won't need it," I tell her.

"Draco!"

"Bye Granger! Keep her from shopping us out of a house won't you?"

I threw floo powder into the fire. "Couturière de l'île." I pushed Hermione in and stepped in after her.

We landed in the heart of magical Paris in one of the most expensive clothiers. We're greeted by an array of staff, clients, and fabric flying all around.

"Astoria what the hell?" Hermione hisses in my ear, "I can't just floo outside the country!"

"Oh please, you're Hermione Granger. You can go as you please," I replied.

"No, I can't. I have a daughter!"

"You have a what!?"

My question seems to calm her down a bit. "I have a daughter. The whole country just found out."

I gape at her. "Just what the hell did I miss?"

"How do you not know? Where the hell have you been?"

"Where have I-? I was in Australia for M.I business!"

"I thought Draco was in charge of Malfoy Industries?" Hermione asked.

I waved the thought away. "No, Draco's studying psychology actually. But let's go back to you having a daughter. Who's the father? Why haven't we heard anything? What kind of rock did I live under that I missed this piece of news?"

"You really don't know anything," Hermione said with surprise. "I thought Draco hadn't told you about me because of my mental breakdown."

"You had a what now? You know what? Don't answer that. This requires wine."

I grabbed her hand this time and pulled her gently out of the store.

"I know we haven't talked before but I would really like to be your friend. I don't have many of those," I said; "The Slytherins all do try to keep out of each other's way to avoid suspicion, and the other Houses tend to avoid Draco and me at all costs."

Hermione stared at me for a moment but then wrapped her fingers around mine and smiled. "Oh, what the hell. We're already here, might as well make the best of it."

"That's the spirit!"

We walked out of the store hand in hand and started looking for a suitable drinking spot.

Keelan's p.o.v

"This is a beautiful day Lolly! Have the elves prepare Hermione's favorites and tell Momo to gather our best flowers. I want them to adorn every inch of the house!"

I look up from my reading. Neville was in a really good mood. "May I ask about this sudden euphoria of yours?"

Neville turns beaming at me. "Hermione's finally getting the help she deserves. What's not to be happy about?"

I smile too. I set down my book and give the Assistant professor my full attention. "That is good news! Imagine how much happier she'll be when she can unburden herself."

Neville began to frown. "Her problems are not a burden."

"You misunderstand. Hermione's problems are real but we're all too close to the problem, have too much interest in them, that we can't give her the support she needs to let everything out.

"When she's with us, Hermione feels this need to reach this unattainable image she thinks we have of her. She has to be "quote-unquote", I make the air quotes, "perfect."

"Hermione has always been a perfectionist." Neville tries to defend.

"Grabbing tea with a friend shouldn't be an all or nothing proposition," I replied.

I see some of the happiness leave him as the truth sets in. "I know you're right. I just wish I could solve all these problems for her."

"Hermione must walk her own path, Neville."

He gives me a wry smile. "Stop being so good at calming people down. We're all going to come short when you leave otherwise."

I give a chuckle. "I'm sure you'll survive."

Neville gives a dramatic sigh. "With great hardship perhaps; but we will survive."

Dear Headmistress McGonagall,

My name is Master Keelan Azikiwe. I am writing to you in regard of a possible research opportunity with the centaur tribe that resides in the Forbidden Forest...of course I understand I must also ask the Scutum tribe for permission to access their lands...

...access to the library would be helpful for research purposes...

...more than willing to perform guest lectures this upcoming school year...

I have published works in Journals like...

...free of charge...outside arrangements...

...references include... Mistress Hermione Granger, a close friend of mine coupled with Master Doniscous of South Africa...

I understand that it is late to ask but I would ask that you would still consider my request.

Kind regards,

Keelan Azikiwe

Master Magizoologist

Congo Basin Head of Magical Habitat Conservation

Head of Zimbabwean Nundu Conservation