if you haven't already read my fanfics on ao3 I shame you because ffnet is a nightmare for me to use and ao3 is sexy.

through thick and thin

It was the annual Vocaloid dinner; an event celebrated every November between the idols. Every year, several Vocaloids would be asked to put on a performance, and this time around, Len was one of them.

It'd been a while since Rin had seen him.

They'd had a falling out a few months back—it seemed the two did have their differences, despite their uncanny similarities. Although they were often advertised as a two-for-one package, recently they'd been going their own ways, and getting on each other's nerves more and more.

Perhaps these things weren't supposed to last forever—people change, she knew that at least, but it still hurt to think about. He had a special place in her heart, despite the bitter taste in her mouth.

She watched as he climbed the steps up to the stage at the front of the venue. Everyone was dressed dashingly for the event—Len wasn't an exception. Tonight he wore a light grey tuxedo and a yellow tie, and a bright, paparazzi-winning smile.

As he thanked everyone for coming, Rin felt someone tug on the sleeve of her dress. She turned to face Miku, who was smiling as if she knew something Rin didn't.

"He cleans up pretty well, doesn't he?" Miku said, twisting a strand of hair around her pinky finger.

Rin glanced back at the man standing at the front of the room, settling himself down in front of the piano. She snorted. "I guess so, but he still has that stupid little pony."

"Oh, you love it," Miku teased.

Her cheeks grew warm and she forced herself to look forward at the stage with a sigh. Ponytail or not, Len would still look good, but there was something about it that was familiar and reassuring. A few years back he went through a phase of short hair, and she found herself missing that extra tuft on the back of his head.

Tonight he had a white ribbon tied around it.

Len hovered over the piano keys, hesitating, before he cleared his throat into the mic.

"You know, this song, it's kind of special to me," he said, a nervous edge to his voice. "When I wrote it, I was thinking about someone. She's very dear to me, even though we have gone through several… rough patches together."

Rin's eyebrow went up. This was new. He had a lover? She glanced back at Miku questioningly, who shrugged at her.

He looked out into the audience, as if searching for someone. Their eyes met briefly, before he moved his gaze back down to his hands.

She didn't know why it felt like someone was squeezing her chest.

"It's called 'orange'," he finished.

Rin sat frozen in her seat as the Vocaloids clapped politely and he launched into the song. The hall filled with the soft melody of the piano and the warm timbre of his voice. His eyes fluttered shut as he sang, and it hit her like an avalanche. Lyrics flowed out from his mouth; down a river, carrying the song along with them.

They swam in her head, and a small part of her heart was saying, hey, those lyrics, I think they're for me.

But they couldn't be. Surely they were for someone else. Some other girl he loved dearly, that he didn't have petty fights with, that wasn't headstrong and stubborn and liked her own way. Surely.

She didn't move as his voice trailed off into silence and the room burst into yet another round of applause. Talented, adored, Len Kagamine . He stood from the piano stool to bow with a pleased expression, his hair glowing gold under the stage lights. As he made his way back down to his seat in the audience, his eyes drifted again to where she was seated, and their gazes met once more.

Her breath caught in her throat as she locked up for second time, unsure with how to respond or anything. Then his gaze was gone, a light breeze against her skin on a sweltering summer day.

"I wonder who that was dedicated to," Miku said from behind her, and eventually Rin turned her head to see her smug expression.

"Well, it wasn't about me," Rin said down to her knees.

Miku cocked a brow. "Oh really? Why? Did you ask?"

"No, I just…"

"Who else would it have been about?" Gumi interjected from across the table, her bracelets jingling noisily as she reached for her drink. "Everyone knows Len's absolutely dry and stone cold when it comes to any other person."

Rin shook her head. "It couldn't have been about me. We…" She trailed off. Everyone knew about their little falling out.

Or, well, big falling out. It was big. Big enough for magazine headlines, apparently.

"Well, Rin, you can ask him about it, because he's headed our way," Miku said, nodding at something over Rin's shoulder.

She turned as quick as lightning in her seat to confirm that, yes, indeed, Len was making his way over to their table across the room. His expression was guarded, she couldn't see through it; what he was thinking. Her stomach churned.

Once within earshot, he stopped and gave a curt nod to the other people at her table in greeting. "Miku, Gumi," he said. "Hope you're having a nice evening?"

"Would rather be anywhere but here," Miku said with a blinding smile. "But yeah, sure, it's good enough."

"Looking forward to the food," Gumi added into her glass of champagne.

Len just grinned at the girls' cynical responses, unbothered, before fixing his gaze on Rin, who was burning in her seat. His voice softened. "Can I borrow you for a moment, Rin?"

She couldn't find the words to say no, and Miku had shoved her up and out of her seat from behind before that, anyway. Soon she was following him out of the hall and into the empty foyer. Her heart was beating so loud, it was almost deafening in her own ears.

Rin opened her mouth to speak, but no sounds could come out.

Len swooped in first, turning on his heel to face her. He wore a serious expression. "Are you still mad at me, Rin?"

She fumbled with the hem of her dress's collar, a sinking feeling in her chest as she tried to force something from her mouth. "No," she croaked. It was true—she wasn't mad at him, she was never mad to begin with. Just upset. Frustrated. Sad. But never angry.

His gaze grew soft, and his hands sunk down into his pant pockets. "You looked mad during my performance."

"I did?" she wondered aloud, weaving the fabric of her dress around her fingertips. "Well, I wasn't."

Len took a step forward towards her. Rin didn't move back. "Were you jealous?" he asked. He looked her in the eyes; his own were dark in the dim light, yet still sticking pins straight through her heart.

"Jealous," she echoed with a scoff. "Of course not. Me, jealous? I would never."

His solemn look cracked as his lips curved into a grin. "Who else on earth would be so dear to me, Rin?" His fingers reached out to trail along her jawline, before stopping at her chin, thumb tucking under to force her to meet his gaze. "Who else on earth has been by my side this whole time, through thick and thin, my shadow and my support?"

Rin pulled a face, fighting back the urge to say, Me . She didn't know what he was getting at, but she'd rather he'd just get straight to the point. "So?"

Len rolled his eyes, dropping his hand and stepping away. "Come on , Rin," he said, a hint of annoyance in his tone. "How many months haven't you talked to me? How long are we going to do this for? It can't last forever."

She rubbed at her chin, skin burning where he touched, and glowered. "You haven't been talking to me either , Len. Stop trying to put the blame on me."

"Yeah, well, maybe I haven't," he acknowledged with a shrug. "But you started it first."

Rin folded her arms over her chest.

He sighed, defeated. "Look, I get it, okay? We're a team, and me going off and signing all these contracts to perform with others looks like I don't want that anymore. That's not true, Rin." He stepped forward again, lowering his voice.

"All those people in that room—" He gestured to the door of the hall they'd just walked out of moments earlier. "—they don't mean as much to me as you do. You're just as important to me as they are. Just because I'm agreeing to collaborate with other Vocaloids, doesn't mean I want to replace you or anything like that."

She looked down at her feet, suffocating in her tiny high heel shoes saved especially for these kinds of occasions. Usually, she'd wear anything but this kind of uncomfortable footwear. And right now, she was really regretting her decision of not bringing a more favourable change of shoes.

"I know," she mumbled. "I'm just stupid."

Len shook his head. "No you're not, Rin."

"I am," Rin argued. "I'm just afraid you'll find someone who's less stubborn and annoying and much easier to work with, and want to move on from me. That's all."

He chuckled, a hand resting on her shoulder. She looked up to his face. "I would never," he said. "As much as your stubbornness and all can get on my nerves, it's also what I appreciate about you. You're never willing to give up without a fight. I like your tenacity."

"I don't know why," she said dryly.

"Seriously." He leaned in close. "Who else would I write that song about?"

The heat flowed to her face as she averted her gaze, his hot breath tickling her cheeks. Fine. She let out a shaky sigh. "I'm sorry for being jealous and doubting you, Len."

Len paused, surprised by her apology, wavering. Then his face broke out into a warm smile, that wrapped its arms around her heart and pulled it into a comforting embrace. "I forgive you," he said. "I'm sorry, too. For not trying to understand how you feel."

Rin lowered her head, blood rushing to her cheeks. She'd known him for almost all of her career life. For so long . And yet that smile of his still made her feel like a hopeless school girl in love. She was wrapped around his finger, although that was a forbidden secret no one could know. Not even him.

"So can we still be partners in crime, Rin?" he asked, hand trailing down her arm to intertwine his fingers with hers.

She bumped her forehead into his shoulder, avoiding his eyes. "Of course, Len."

"Or maybe…" he trailed off, pulling back. She finally lifted her gaze to meet his, and that was when he cupped her cheeks in his hands. He lowered his voice to a whisper. "Maybe we could be more than that?"

It was just them, alone, in the foyer. The dim, orange lighting flickering, and the muffled sound as another person gave their performance. It was a sad love song. But this— them —they didn't have to be.

Rin's heart fluttered in her chest as she stood on her tiptoes to press her mouth against his, planting her hands on either shoulder. His lips were warm, soft, and oh so very familiar; it felt right, it felt Len.

He relaxed into her mouth and let his hands roam to cradle the back of her head, the arch in her back, pulling her close. There they stood, in one another's arms, listening and swaying to the music until it faded out into applause.

epilogue

When Rin and Len walked back in with their hands interlocked and lips swollen, Miku shot a sly look at Gumi, and they discreetly fistbumped each other under the table.

"Should we say something?" Gumi hissed while pretending to take a sip of her drink.

Miku just smirked to herself, eyes half-lidded, watching as Rin made her way back to their table. "No. Let her think that it isn't blatantly obvious and everyone doesn't know."